there's a lot we need to talk about and i'm really really scared lol

Рет қаралды 80,809

Ай бұрын

Heyyy friends. Firstly I just wanna say thank you all for sticking around and for all the nice messages asking about where I've been lately. Secondly I want to apologise for the fact that I haven't regularly posted for the longest time and just kind of left you guys in the dark about a load of things, but hopefully you can understand why this update was quite difficult to film/post and why it's taken me so long. I genuinely just want to have a fresh start with everything again and I've been managing to do that with my 'real' life behind the scenes, but I haven't felt like I've been able to dive into creating content again without at least giving you guys some kind of explaination.
It's been a rough couple of years! And there's definitely some things in my life that still need ironing out (adulting is the worst) but I truly do feel like I'm in the best place that I've been for a long time and I'm just so ready (well..not ready, but ready enough lol) to just build on that again. Even if we've never spoken or met, you guys genuinely mean so much to me and I basically feel like I've just been a really bad internet pal as of late and I'm sorry. But I'm not going anywhere! I'm gonna be 87 years old with 7 face lifts, still chatting away to a camera I'm sure.
Obviously now it's just me doing all of this it might take me a couple weeks to get back into a full routine of filming, editing and uploading, but I can't wait to get stuck back in to making content again like the good old days. I'm hopefully (as long as it all goes to plan) working on a new series for this channel that I hope you'll love. It's gonna be something quite different but it should be a lot of fun and hey, if it flops then WE MOVE! I just wanna create fun/inspiring/entertaining content for you guys and hopefully we can figure it all out together. I've missed you, I love you and thank you again for being so patient and just fantastic internet mates. Here's to doing this all togeva 🥂
(Jeez I'm nervous about posting this hahah but YOLOOOO)
PRODUCTS USED:
By Ellie Brow Texture byellie.co.uk/products/brow-t...
ABH Magic Touch Concealer tidd.ly/3Vuupbt
Pink Honey BFF Bronzer tidd.ly/4c5snWq
Laura Mercier Powder tidd.ly/3KOBJK9
Too Faced Bronzer tidd.ly/3z4ZyuL
MAC Mineralize Skin Finish tidd.ly/3KNmscn
Doll Beauty Blush tidd.ly/4cr2KPo
Ofra x Steph Toms Highlight tidd.ly/3xmVqWi
Missguided Freckle Pen www.superdrug.com/make-up/fac...
Urban Decay All Nighter tidd.ly/4bb3nMe
17 Lip Liner in Dusky Pink tidd.ly/3WfodX2
Huda Beauty Life Liner in Brown tidd.ly/4c5zIVM
L'Oreal Telescopic Mascara tidd.ly/4cr30Om
SUBSCRIBE: bit.ly/1KZZQ3e
TIKTOK: / itsstephtoms
INSTAGRAM: / itsstephtoms
TWITTER: / itsstephtoms
DISCOUNT CODES 💸
- Up to 20% off Cult Beauty (USE 'STEPHXCB') - tidd.ly/3UN5zTl
- 20% off WILD Deodorant (USE 'STEPHTOMS') - tidd.ly/3JvYAZU
- 10% off www.solotica.com (USE 'STEPHTOMS') - I wear Ocre usually!
- 10% off www.fluxundies.com/steph (USE 'STEPHT')
- £££ off www.illamasqua.com (USE 'STEPHTOMS')
BUSINESS ENQUIRIES 📧
stephtoms@mcsaatchisocial.com
PO BOX 📬
Steph Toms
c/o M&C Saatchi Social
36 Golden Square
London
W1F 9EE

Пікірлер: 1 500

@stephanietoms Ай бұрын

Guys I am genuinely OVERWHELMED (in a good way for once hahah) with all the comments and love. I took 20 minutes out to have a cup of tea and 3 bags of crisps (#eatclean) and came back to so many comments that I can't even keep up with replying! But I'm gonna do my best to respond to every single one 💖 thank you all so so much. It definitely feels like a huge weight has been lifted off of my shoulders and I know I wasn't ready before, but this is all something I should have done so much sooner because the responses and support has honestly shocked me. Like I knew you guys were KOOOOOL but wow ur all rly rly cool. I dunno what else to say but I really do feel like this is the start of a new chapter with a lot of things and I can't thank you enough for sticking around and just making me feel so loved tonight. Love you all xxx

@niamhgibson2932 Ай бұрын

Love you xxxx

@inesmartins7854 Ай бұрын

Ok... I'm very sorry for your lost Steph 😢 I genuinely didn't knew all of that. When it comes to you, being offline for a few months... well I have to be honest... I didn't forget you, you are my favorite influencer and I still love you and suport you and I'm always anxious for a new video. And I'm 100% sure that your grandparents and your Mom are insanely PROUD of you. Big kiss from Portugal 🇵🇹 and we are here for you, every time you need

@charlottedownes3790 Ай бұрын

U are amazing ❤

@inesmartins7854 Ай бұрын

Modest opinion... you are beautiful, strong, inteligente, funny... so we are here because you are one of us Steph, because we love you and nerds never leave one of their own behind, so we will never leve you behind

@jordanwig1 Ай бұрын

❤

@niamhgibson2932 Ай бұрын

There’s so many KZfaqrs out there with the fancy setups and cameras and doing makeup… they aren’t you! We watch you for you!

@sammypayne07 Ай бұрын

👏🏻

@stephanietoms Ай бұрын

aw man why has thissss comment made me almost well up! thank you so so much babe xx

@kimboyd2549 Ай бұрын

I know what you mean when you pull away. I close myself off as well. Thank you for coming to us. I will be an ear to listen. Mental health is something we all deal with and I am glad that their are people like you who help others in ways you may not know.

@liya_xx Ай бұрын

Exactly! I'm not into make up that much, I just love her, the calmness that comes from her and her voice 🤭

@courtneylia7383 Ай бұрын

@@stephanietomsAnd that is exactly why we love you 😊💛

@nickyleng6917 Ай бұрын

I've never commented before on your videos, I'm 62 year old woman who likes make up but rarely wears it. So why do I watch your content? Simply because of your authenticity as a person. I'm so pleased to hear you say that you are realising that you are enough. Chant it like a mantra to yourself everyday, because YOU ARE ENOUGH! You have experienced so much loss and grief in such a short time, and yet here you are, unafraid to be vulnerable and that, darling woman, takes true, deep strength.

@staceysteinhart1359 Ай бұрын

I fully agree. You are a beautiful person inside and out. You are so authentic. That’s why 500k people follow you.

@amy_333 Ай бұрын

this is why you’re successful - because of your authenticity & honesty. we love you no matter what queen, sending you so much love 🤍🤍

@stephanietoms Ай бұрын

ohhh my love thank you so so much xx

@MaxineGeorgina Ай бұрын

Steph I'm a silent watcher but I've had to comment today. I'm a 54 year old woman who was full of self hate from a young age just like you. Bullied for looking nerdy (glasses and big teeth) in 2020 during lockdown I started my KZfaq channel. It's a tiny channel compared to yours only 4.5k subscribers so far but I keep going because like you I've realised people actually like me for me and its a nice feeling isn't it. You steph are beautiful funny talented and the world is definitely your oyster. We are all here for you and always will be. I know this video was tough for you sweetheart but trust me when I say things can only get better. You are quite a bit younger than me but your videos helped inspire me to start KZfaq so thank you for that and thank you for just being you. Sending you lots of love positive vibes and blessings for what's to come. ❤❤❤❤

@mllekatrin Ай бұрын

🫶🏻

@Martina010 Ай бұрын

❤

@mrussell3264 Ай бұрын

OOOh...I'm coming up for 50 in July so have subscribed to your channel too, I only just found Steph's!! @steph that's a lot to go through at such a young age and we all make mistakes at any age, you've got yourself together from that, now you've dusted yourself off and gotten back out there, it takes guts especially to come back to social media and being an influencer, good luck girl ❤

@tashaleeman Ай бұрын

Subscribed ❤

@MaxineGeorgina Ай бұрын

@@tashaleeman thank you so much ❤️❤️❤️

@darchangel8675309 Ай бұрын

The reason I started watching you is because you’re hilarious, you’re smart, snarky, and self-aware. Those traits are *you*, Steph. Before the 4K camera, before the brand deals, before the ultra boujee PR-there is, was, and always will be you. I remember watching you put on bright blue eye shadow with Primark palettes, and that Steph is the Steph I’m still rocking with years later. 💜

@juliaspoonie3627 Ай бұрын

Same ❤️

@alaskajadesmith4503 Ай бұрын

Same here 🥹❤️

@tashaleeman Ай бұрын

Yes yes yes 🙌🏻

@Gallusticket Ай бұрын

Maaaaate, I feel like you are the wee English ADHD counterpart to my huge, autistic Scottish ass except you HAVE the balls to do this. My chest hurts from watching this because I’ve been through everything you’ve been through too, you are a fkn champ for putting in the work and coming back vulnerable but stronger and more determined than before. You are an inspiration and I’m sure I speak for many of your followers when I say I’ll be watching and supporting the Toms no matter what. Unless you become a light coverage/skin tint girly, that’s where I draw the line ❤️

@francescabrooks4494 Ай бұрын

People dont buy into brands, they buy into you...the person who keeps it real, who still shows up even when life is shite.i saw you once in debenhams in truro when i worked there years ago ,you were down to earth and youve not changed.your authenticity about who you are can be a lot for some people (i know this about myself😂) but you keep being just that!the ones who love you will continue to do so❤

@emmagrant689 Ай бұрын

"There's gunna be a lot of tangents " The adhd side quests 🤣🤣🤣 (I'm still watching but I did giggle at that) xx

@stephanietoms Ай бұрын

hahah LITERALLY!! everything i do/say takes 5 times longer i swear because of the tangents 😂

@emmagrant689 Ай бұрын

@stephanietoms 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 you're not alone my friend!

@daisyo.6666 Ай бұрын

ADHD squad unite!

@ebeb657 Ай бұрын

Omg! There was a reason I loved your vids. ADHD peeps seemed to find each other. Diagnosed 6 months ago and it’s a ride!!!!! Welcome back. We missed you!

@emmagrant689 Ай бұрын

@@ebeb657 we're packs ✌🏻 I am 8 months diagnosed 🫶🏻

@sammypayne07 Ай бұрын

Im a silent watcher, and I can confirm I do watch the videos for makeup. But let's be real, we come for the makeup but stay for the personality. To add to the list of clichés, what doesn't kill you makes you stronger... right? I'm sorry to hear that life has shit on you from a great height for many years. And never apologies for the way you feel. Your feelings are just as valid as anyones. Never compare your struggle to anyone elses. You are valid. You are enough. I hope it is all on the up from here. Girl, you deserve it. Love ya lots. Xx

@lindasalfen7879 Ай бұрын

Ohh don't - I can't tell you how many times I have heard that - :( lol

@annabel5411 Ай бұрын

I can see at the end of the video how PHYSICALLY relieved you look for getting everything off of your chest. You’re such an inspiration.

@crystalcoates Ай бұрын

Legitimately, the way you speak about life topics and balance your thoughts and feelings is the most relatable thing I’ve heard from someone, in a way I’ve never really heard from someone else before. Like being scared of nothing but everything at the same time? It’s hard to explain but internet friends can be like, such a significant part of making you feel less weird and okay about yourself. So this was a great video! Hope the cockroaching keeps on the roll 🐾

@wondrousjaguar8907 Ай бұрын

Came for the makeup, stayed for Steph…. Self acceptance is so difficult and i commend you for laying it bare. I adore you! Have for years. You (and itssabbrina) are the only makeup girlie i follow.. for the makeup initially… now I rarely even wear makeup.. but im still watching you!! Proud of you and so is your mum xxx

@alexandrarix3573 Ай бұрын

Can confirm I just like you. And I’ve liked you for years. And I’ll continue to like you for years. And if you pop off for a bit then come back - I’ll watch and I’ll still like you. And I think I speak for a lot of us when I say that there’s no pressure from us to show up 100% of the time or to be 100% consistent.

@jennilovegrove Ай бұрын

Here here! Well said ❤

@ktjbudgie1114 Ай бұрын

I don’t care what you post, I just enjoy your content because of your personality. I’ve been watching you since 2014 and every time I see a new upload I click straight away. Love all the way from an Aussie ADHDer.

@TwoFourJoy Ай бұрын

“In your bins” 😆😆😆 that properly made me laugh. What a genuinely touching and tough video to make, I think you’re very brave. Sending love and positivity to you and all your new chapters.

@michellex999 Ай бұрын

I’ve been watching you for years when you only had a few hundred subs, and I’m still excited when I see you posting. I am so proud to see the woman you became and seeing the woman you are becoming. You’re real and I really appreciate that. Thank you for being you!

@lilmissfloyd Ай бұрын

So refreshing to hear someone be so honest about these things. Really brave of you to open up about all of this. Id personally watch/listen to whatever you do ❤ x

@andreapocze1929 Ай бұрын

This was quite relatable. The inability to no feel your worth is so painful, unfortunately a lot of us feels the same. I think it is important to talk honestly about these stuff.

@uhmmmm411 Ай бұрын

You are so strong ❤ I cant wait to see what's next for you! You've inspired me to start working on a few things for myself again after being in a hole too.. thank you for being so open and genuine, I've always loved your personality over everything 🥰

@Hfin1072 Ай бұрын

As someone who is recently diagnosed with ADHD and recently lost a close relative, you are like a superhero in my eyes for making it here!! You are such a strong, wonderful human bean. Not only from the shite youve waded through but for opening up about said shite wading. Not a single thing in this world lasts forever, not the stars in the sky or the flowers on the ground. The bad times will pass, sad memories will eventually bring a smile to your face and dreams will come true that you havent even thought of yet. Reach for the sky sweet angel, it may be a bumpy journey but its your journey! I bet your mum would be so proud; being vulnerable and making yourself open to the INTERNET, come on, whats more bad ass than that. And p.s. id watch you all day, any day, doing absolutely fuck all 🤍✨

@TheOriginalBethan Ай бұрын

My opinion isn't worth much, but I found your videos like 8 years ago when I was overwhelmed and lonely at uni. Idk who I really am a lot of time, I get you there, but I know you're my comfort videos. What other YTer would apply makeup with nuggets??? Looking forward to where you take your videos. You're a legend, thank you for adding light to some dark times x

@beckiimlach3248 Ай бұрын

A lot of what you talked about, I am still going through. Thank you for your honesty, and I know that when you make your brand you’ll do a banging highlight 😊

@mandyhonline Ай бұрын

Thank you so much for being honest and open ❤ I'm so sorry for everything you've been through.

@ejmsj94 Ай бұрын

I’m so sorry you’ve had to go through all this and fair play for sharing with us! I don’t often comment on KZfaq however I really appreciate videos like this as it helps us all realise that shit happens to all of us! Also been through a lot of loss in life as many have and it can feel so isolating. You’re doing an amazing job, I find you really relatable and enjoyable to watch so what ever you choose to do I’m certain we will all be here cheering you on ❤

@kkirsty7905 Ай бұрын

Im 21 mins in, and this is how my 13 year old daughter describes herself. I tell her daily that none of this is true. She was diagnosed with autism during lockdown. I cry often because of what she says. Thank you for posting this. I'm going to show her this, and hopefully, she will see that she is not different, not on her own. Thank you

@Stephilou Ай бұрын

26 and diagnosed Autistic 2 weeks ago! Tell your daughter she is beautiful, she is amazing and we rule! The community is always here to support! I hope she never feels alone! Plus being geeky is the best! I love being a nerd and so does my girlfriend! Sending lots of hugs and hopes she sees her worth soon! Being different is really fricken cool! 💜

@hannahpearce4241 Ай бұрын

Silent watcher! Cornish gal, 39 and love your videos! I lost my mum 3 years ago and felt every word you said. It’s wonderful to hear you being so honest and looking after yourself x

@serenaconnollyy Ай бұрын

so so proud of you. i used to watch the lockdown twitch streams, i’m so here for it returning !!! need to see you on sims, supermarket simulator and minecraft asap. also i’d love to see some fashion content too, hauls, chatty get ready with me kinda vibes. take your time, we will be waiting patiently.

@hannahreynolds179 Ай бұрын

I'm in my 40s and you make me laugh every time I watch you. Seeing you just be yourself is very refreshing. That includes you trying to do your job while everything's burning. I think most of us can relate to that. There's no need to know where you're at. Endless possibilities never stop feeling scary but this whole process will be worth it 😘

@hannahwaring6281 Ай бұрын

I love how relatable you are and how real you are. I am so unbelievably sorry for everything you have been through. Just remember it’s ok to laugh when something is funny and cry when you’re sad. Your Poundland video is my go to when I need to laugh, that foundation shade and your facial expressions genuinely never fail to make me absolutely howl 😂. Love you lots mate x

@sujinabegum9580 Ай бұрын

Thank you for sharing ❤ You got this girl! And we are right behind you... we are here for the hyper you, the chill you, just you as you are! Onwards and upwards 🥰🥰🥰

@user-hy9mu4dg5v Ай бұрын

I wish you could see yourself through your viewer's eyes. You are the reason I watch KZfaq. Your videos make me happy,and have helped me through the last six years since I had my stroke. You are such a beautiful person inside and out.

@connorsmith7092 Ай бұрын

Hey steph, my mum passed 4 years ago aswell to cancer, its the most aweful thing to go through! You dont know me but i am always here! I get it. You have helped me in my darkest times and i would love to be uere for you aswell! ❤❤❤

@stephanietoms Ай бұрын

first of all i'm so sorry you lost your mum too :( it's just awful and i hope you're doing okay. you just commenting something positive is absolutely enough! thank you so much xx

@gingerbreadloverjulie8609 Ай бұрын

Wow Steph I can relate to u alot of this feeling off losing everyone. I am an only child I have lost mum and now dad and it terrifies me that I will loss my partner. I am waiting to speak to someone as I defo suffer some PTSD of finding my dad passed. And I defo have death anxiety.

@kiraaa89 Ай бұрын

Sorry for your loss x

@44LillPuffin Ай бұрын

@gingerbreadloverjulie8609 I think I know what you're talking about. I watched a few videos from palliative care nurses talking about how a lot of their clients see their family members, that have already died, before they pass. Like they will tell the nurse "my sister is here, she said she's coming back on Wednesday" then they die on the Wednesday. I don't believe in heaven and souls. But this really has been making feel comforted. I've watched people I love die. One of them, they woke up for a while and when I think back, they where saying things that I now think someone was there to take her. Now I look forward to seeing if my dad is going to come. I've always been atheist byw. So this is weird for me.

@samanthanellist7252 Ай бұрын

I would love to see vlogs and Pokémon card openings 🙌🏻 tbh I just enjoy watching you, not really fussed what the content is

@courtneywagner7653 Ай бұрын

You are enough girl!!! I love watching you. When I have a bad day, I can’t wait to watch your videos. You can lift a persons spirits!!

@suzannecarden4330 Ай бұрын

Good on you girl! ❤ You’re magnificent 😊 what a warrior to be able to pick yourself back up after going through all that. Looking forward to seeing what the future brings for you xxx

@christielarke3498 Ай бұрын

Oh, sweet baby girl! I felt the same way until I turned 50. I went through similar things. I'm 57 and so comfortable in my own skin. As far as people liking me, now I don't give a flying fig! You are enough! I enjoy watching you, and you will find your footing!

@grendels-mother Ай бұрын

Joining the rest in sending a lot of love beforehand before watching the full video. Thank you for your honesty and great vibes over all these years and I can only hope the good things will find you again soon as well 🫶

@stephanietoms Ай бұрын

thank you so so much! honestly overwhelmed by all da lurveee xxx

@jessicalowe-ic3zi Ай бұрын

So much respect for you posting this & going into so much depth, i can relate to a lot of this & you speaking out has opened my eyes and put things into perspective, we all love u so much honestly ❤❤❤

@amybradley4034 Ай бұрын

Mate you're so loved! You'll smash your come back! Wishing you a tonne of happiness and peace 💜

@wilhelmina3433 Ай бұрын

Im so sorry about what you have gone through. After watching I just have to say that I have never related to a video by an influencer more. Im a long time fan, i found you with the makeup but stayed for you! I really like you! I just want you to know that. You have been a fave and inspiration for me for so long, theres not many influencers I can watch and see myself in and relate to the way I do with you. I love your style and personality. After this vid I cant believe how much we have in common.. I have similar experiences with alot of it youre talking about, and just remember its so valid. And Im so sorry for you, just know youre not alone and nobody can take away those feelings. They are valid because all of it are real big and are traumatic things for anyone. Also just have to add ( the body dysmorphia is so real). I was bullied as a child and the way you talk about those feelings are the realest thing. The reason i got into makeup and fashion was mostly because I never felt pretty enough or cool/good enough because of it. I really get it. I guess we both have this year as a fresh start in many ways. I wish all the best for you going forward from now! I will be here and I will be watching and remember we love u ❤

@Luxeria Ай бұрын

We love you Steph! And will always watch 🖤🖤🖤🖤

@stephanietoms Ай бұрын

i love YOUUUUU!! can't wait to meet you some day and kiss ur face gout xxx

@missmissay27 Ай бұрын

Happy to see you back! :) i'm so sorry you had such a horrible long stretch of life really lifing. In listening to your whole story i would have 1000% felt the exact same way. I'm so happy to hear you are feeling better and doing better! Can wait for more videos!

@amiedwards993 Ай бұрын

It was like listening to myself for most parts! You are incredible, this isn't your whole story just a chapter and how amazing is it that you can write so many more amazing chapters in your life ❤

@NoriGrace Ай бұрын

I’m usually a silent watcher but sending all my love, Steph! It really sounds like you’ve been dragged through the shit and you deserve to feel so so proud of yourself ❤️ Heck yeah the world is your oyster girl!! Xx

@stephanietoms Ай бұрын

awww well i'm glad you're here today! thank you so so much xxx

@katieperx Ай бұрын

Oh bless you.. it’s hard losing people you love especially those closest to you. I lost my 3 year old son and it’s the harder thing I’ve ever been through. That was 2018 and I’m still suffering now.. stop beating yourself up. We all deal with things differently and you should be proud that you’re coming out the other side. We all love you. You say it’s cringe but you do feel like a friend and id love to meet you! Take care of yourself and remember you are enough ❤

@jesuisaimeex Ай бұрын

I lost my 6 year old in 2016. My heart is with you mama❤

@katieperx Ай бұрын

@@jesuisaimeex same to you ❤️

@AumendJoy5962 Ай бұрын

I started watching you because I've felt like I could relate to your natural rambling, thoughts, ideas and even your comment a few years ago about wearing interesting T-shirts just to create a conversation starter in a public setting. It was a lovely idea and it helped me relax and you've given new perspectives on things about life in general bc you're so kind and you almost think the way I do and it makes watching your videos so relatable and comforting. Thank you.

@6Jillybeans Ай бұрын

You've got the realest and most fun personality. You've always been memorable for me since I discovered your channel. So sorry about everything you've been through and it's A LOT. I wish nothing but the best for you regardless of what that may be in the future x

@amyf1084 Ай бұрын

I’m just about to watch this video so I’ve no idea what’s in it or what it’s about but I just wanna say as a nearly 40 year old you are 1 of my fave people to watch and I genuinely laugh along with you. Xx

@stephanietoms Ай бұрын

oh mate thank you so much!! this video isn't the most funny thing in the world hahah but i hope it's something! thanks for sticking around xx

@amyf1084 Ай бұрын

@@stephanietoms it’s true and it’s from the heart which in my eyes makes you even more amazing. Xxx

@TracyAli83 Ай бұрын

Ive got ADHD, OCD and Anxiety and i get seasonal depression. Its a struggle but i try and see the positive in things. We each have silent struggles we don't talk about.

@SMKNGRL420 Ай бұрын

Yasss me too sending love ❤

@Intrusiviteayoucantsipwithus Ай бұрын

Thank you for posting this, I know it’s not the same but I go to psychotherapy and saying these things out loud is so hard but also really worth it, but please don’t invalidate your experience, there is always someone worse, but that doesn’t mean you can’t feel how you feel when bad stuff happens to you, I’m so proud watching you say all of this, and I’ve absolutely missed you! I can’t wait to see you back on here and reinventing & rebuilding! You’re wonderful to watch and thank you for being so authentic ❤❤❤

@swarner79 Ай бұрын

You are amazing, you've got this. I can totally relate to so much of what you just shared. And honestly, you have inspired me. Sending love your way

@tinashort9098 Ай бұрын

The first thing that needs to happen is for you to gain control of your mental health. I just came to your channel yesterday to see if you had uploaded and I maybe missed it. I haven’t been at my best the last few months and haven’t been on here allot. My grandson left for the US army in April and my granny heart has been through some shit!! Depression is an absolute bitch!!! As an old granny I feel like I just wanna hug you and squeeze all the bullshit that’s hurting you away!!!! I will be here with you as long as you’re here!!!!❤❤❤❤❤

@stephanietoms Ай бұрын

oh for suuuure! that's what i've been trying to work on the most lately - just doing everything bit by but. i'll always take a granny hug! hope everything is okay for you my love ccc

@mikaelawestin5644 Ай бұрын

Babe, I can relate to 90% of what you went threw the past 4 years 😢 I’m actually in hospital right now bc of depression and alcohol abuse! I drove drunk on Monday night and crashed my car in to a fence.. I’m so happy no one else was in the accident but me, and that I’m alive 🥺🙏🏽 You are my number one “best makeup friend” when I sit down to do my face, you’re keeping me company and make me laugh better than any of my irl peeps 🫶🏽🫶🏽 If you want to visit Sweden and our peaceful nature, I got a spare room with your name on it 🌲🌻👯‍♀️

@annihilxte Ай бұрын

I’m a heroin addict and have been sober 5.5 years. I wish you all the best in your recovery! I promise you life is so much better sober. Next time you could kill someone, or yourself, so please don’t drive intoxicated again 😢 you can do this and you are so much stronger than you think!!! I promise you are. One day at a time ❤ not at all judging btw, I have a DUI from like 7 years ago and still don’t have my license back. Working on it though! Addiction is a horrible disease and I pray you find your way out ❤

@kirstyalcock2401 Ай бұрын

Sending all the love and positivity yoir way! ❤ Congrats on carrying on and being so vulnerable it's not easy x

@Samlovest. Ай бұрын

Oh steph honey. Feel your pain,I nearly ended up being sectioned recently, trauma messes us up luv. We know you care ,I hope you can find the space and time to fully heal. Thank you for being so raw and vulnerable,thank you for just being you, sage your house and manifest . Love ya girl. You got this.❤❤❤

@yvettewan9821 Ай бұрын

I never really comment or anything, but I feel the need to confirm all the things you’re coming to terms with right now: you truly are enough and we really do love you for you. I’ve kinda fallen of out love with makeup, or at least don’t invest as much in it anymore but I’ll never stop watching your videos. You’re just so entertaining, also very relatable to me personally and seem so real, as sad as I get listening to you think negatively of yourself, you’re making your page a safe space to be true to yourself and I can’t put into words how much I appreciate that. I truly truly hope everything will finally work in your favor and genuinely believe you couldn’t deserve it more

@Lissy255 Ай бұрын

Honestly this is one of the most relatable videos I’ve watched. I’ve not experienced the losses that you have but I am fairly certain I have ADHD and everything leading up until this point, all my struggles etc make so much sense. But I feel like the older I get the more I struggle and the more I feel lost in who I am, what value I bring to this world etc. I go through phases of really low confidence and feeling really down and isolating myself and lately it just feels more confusing, because my brain seems fickle and I don’t know what thoughts to trust. Thanks so much for opening up on this, it is more helpful and relatable than you know ❤️

@hannahmatts1746 Ай бұрын

Honestly love you so much, you are more than enough 💖 So proud of you for posting this as it must have took balls, please know we are all here for you and appreciate you. Your videos have been my go to for so many years and have always made my day. Looking forward to you being you 💖

@alexandrahindley Ай бұрын

I'm ready and I'm listening to the very end. As long as you're healthy and happy that's all that matters it really is all that matters. You have taught me a lot about make up and you made me laugh on the days when I was suffering with depression. I've got a lot to say thank you for. Now it's our turn to listen & help you if we can xxx

@stephanietoms Ай бұрын

depression is a BIIIAAATCH so i get it! so glad i could maybe help even in the tiniest way on your worst days. you got this. thank you so much xx

@gheanoviar6185 Ай бұрын

no, literally i really wanna give you a big hug!!!

@stephanietoms Ай бұрын

awww same!!xxx

@BlepBlep-mz6xe Ай бұрын

Ive just recently started watching your videos as a way to cope with my own struggles and self doubt in my life (some alot similar to yours) and u being honest with it as a creator ive felt a strong connection to so quickly not just thru the love and therapy of makeup but also just personality wise, this video truly means a lot as someone whos always healing or trying to from a bunch of trauma and stuff life just hits u with, the utter clutter of everything and just trying to explain it in one take, is difficult in itself. I respect u so much for sitting down and doing it, tho its totally parasocial, doing my makeup while having ur videos rolling have literally been some of the best self healing/care ive done for myself, steph u are so unbelievably cool no matter what and u deserve to know ur content (no matter how much or little) have had a really positive impact on my life especially when ive felt utterly alone, u have felt like an internet big sister i could do my makeup with!! Love u and support u all the way ❤️ guts for laying everything out for strangers like me but it truly means the world, even if its just a small part of it.

@nicolebester7486 Ай бұрын

I just recently found you and I have to say your humor and cheeky commentary I find so refreshing in a world where every influencer says the same exact thing… you are real and honest and down to earth , just the fact that you are willing to let us all in and share this super vulnerable part of you shows how genuine you are and how you are desperate to relate to all of us…. I celebrate your bravery and transparency and respect the hell out of you for that!!! As a late in life adhd -er as well thank you for making me feel like I’m not alone in my crazy feelings as well …. Your inspirational gurl #follower4life❤

@bluemouse5 Ай бұрын

This looks serious, hope you're ok. We all love you lots xx

@stephanietoms Ай бұрын

it is a bit but i'm doing so much better now, thank you!! love you too xx

@bluemouse5 Ай бұрын

@stephanietoms mate you could be talking about soil 😅 I watch because I like you. I recognise so much of what you say in myself, I lost my Dad at 13 and undiagnosed but almost certainly have ADHD. You may feel uncomfortable saying you like to be liked by randoms on the Internet... but it's just as weird to feel like you are friends with someone you watch 😅 honestly, keep being you. Do what is best for you and those that are worth it will support you 😘 xx

@cerievans1980 Ай бұрын

I hope your doing well Steph, I’m sorry you have been going through this. And sorry for all of your loss. You have ever right to complain about losing money, reality is it was not just money you lost, it was your hopes and dreams, because you had plans for the money. I really hope your starting to feel better. Do what makes you happy, create what content makes you happy, what is the worst that could happen, you might lose a few followers who only hope in for make up, but you gain others that prefer a different content. I know you did not like doing them but I loved your vlogs. Xx

@stephanietoms Ай бұрын

thank you so much! yeah it's been a rough old ride but i'm so glad i'm out the other end of things. funnily enough i actually did like the vlogs but i just overthink too much with them 😂 maybe i'll bring them back when i'm back in a routine! sending love xx

@cerievans1980 Ай бұрын

@@stephanietoms you have been through so much, so much more than most can bare, so try not to be to hard on yourself. I’m so glad you are starting to feel a bit better. Your blogs were fab, overthinking is worst, it means we can talk ourselves out of anything, and miss out on the good. Seriously Steph, have some faith in yourself, you are great at what you do, and that’s down to your personality, not your make up skills, though they are great to be fair. Xx

@user-jg1rf1nn8j Ай бұрын

You are definitely ENOUGH! I love watching you because I learn new things (57 years old) and I laugh my ass off! I'm so sorry you've gone through so much, but also very happy and proud for you! Love from Texas, USA

@laurasommer3447 Ай бұрын

You are incredible. Thank you for being so honest and raw. It’s refreshing to see someone not hide the non aesthetic side of life. Just know you’ve become so many people’s hero by just being you and truthful ❤

@TheLoyloy88 Ай бұрын

Great to see you (and the boys) back 😊🐈 you can do anything you put your mind too. Yours and Michael's face has made my night ❤

@roguec4172 Ай бұрын

Love you Steph! I'd watch you do anything! You are my favourite KZfaqr and I was so relieved to see your video tonight (I've been checking everyday for an upload). I'm so, so sorry that life has been so chaotic-honestly I feel the nicest people end up dealing with an unfair amount of trauma. Onwards and upwards ❤.

@popbay1986 Ай бұрын

Bless your heart! Been here nearly 8 years watching. You are fab and you can keep going no matter what. Sending all the love ❤

@poppinpinkchampagne4948 Ай бұрын

gosh i love your strength!!! you’re only a few months older than me and i thought i had it bad but omg my heart aches for you. i cried so much watching this :: sending love to you and your family ♡ and wishing them alll so much happiness and peace and comfort ♥️

@bissybooooo Ай бұрын

I have watched you since pretty much the start, I hope you feel better for coming on here and speaking out. Good luck xx ❤

@jadehenderson1999 Ай бұрын

So so proud of you, however many breaks you need, I will always be around to watch and support❤️

@stephanietoms Ай бұрын

thanks so much jade, means a lot xx

@rangoooo2312 Ай бұрын

Literally would watch any video of yours because you’re so funny. Put you on after bad days at work to cheer myself up. Love you Steph

@amberbelcher1704 Ай бұрын

I’ve missed the authentic you ❤️ keeping you and your close ones in my prayers. Thank you for your openness. Always make the videos when your cup is overflowing (if that makes sense) ❤️ so much love

@shelbyrenner Ай бұрын

I'm so sorry you've been fighting through all that for so long. Happy to hear you're taking care of yourself. I feel like you've explained so many things that we all feel like about ourselves and about life in general, so never feel alone in that. ❤ We love you and your channel, no matter what you're talking about! Thank you for sharing and I pray that you make it through each day knowing that you are loved and appreciated.

@sophiematthews5265 Ай бұрын

Steph I’m sending you so much love! As someone who has also struggled with losing a few close people in a short space of time (also at a relatively young age), I know it can hit hard - I’d love to see you with some fun and chill content to lessen any pressure, but I also know you’ll still bring the badass makeup looks along with it!! The twitch deffo needs a comeback, and from a personal perspective I just love chill and ‘real’ content, nothing too polished - more of a ‘chat with a friend’, unedited ramble vibe😂 We love you for you, and I feel like this new era is going to be a time of healing and happiness, and I for one am super excited to see all of your new content and ventures going forward💖

@katierose4128 Ай бұрын

I’ve been with you from the start and I have always loved how authentic and real you are, how relatable and YOU that you are. Literally think you’re bloody wonderful. ❤

@kell0125 Ай бұрын

I LOVE when you do the vlogs and the makeup. I look forward to watching your videos I go back and rewatch your videos. You for me feel like a someone I could just hangout with and just chill. You are amazing. you got this babe 😘

@charlottesmith7845 Ай бұрын

Literally love your videos Steph. I’ve been watching you for years and we adore you. Life is so tough and can be so cruel but you have made everyone happy by just being you. Xx

@sarahunsworth9721 Ай бұрын

I love you so much! You're amazing and so inspirational. You should be so, so proud of yourself for having the strength and courage to do this video ❤ xxxx

@peace-love-on-the-right Ай бұрын

I'm here and have always been her because of you! I really like you as a person. I'm so sorry for all of the compounded losses you've been through. It's definitely way to much for a single person in a short period of time. It sounds like your finally getting to know your true self. It takes a lot of time for people to reach that point, if they ever do. Please be kind to yourself and give yourself a lot of grace. Many positive vibes are being sent your way sweetie!!!!! 🥰

@klhowardd Ай бұрын

I needed this video more than you’ll ever know! I relate to you so much! Makeup aside, you’re the reason I watch YOU!

@jodiegraham8298 Ай бұрын

i’ve been subbed to you since i was in college and i’m 26 now. from one former nerdy loser teenager (also seeking a late adhd diagnosis! watching you talking about your journey with it gave me the confidence i needed to investigate it for myself) to another, everything that makes you ‘weird’ makes you so so wonderful to us. thank you for still being here. we love you so much!

@starnights6295 Ай бұрын

It takes so much courage to put yourself out there, whether it is us on the Internet or in real life. You are an amazing person, and you see stronger than you think. Also, I have just become a new mum to a 9 week old ginger boy, and I love him and he is fitting in with my other 5 furbabies. Xx

@kazachick Ай бұрын

Been here from the start you’re genuine and human and that’s why I send you a ton of love 🫶🏻❤️🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿

@elliebrown18 Ай бұрын

Always loved you and your honesty and openness makes me love you more! ❤ sending you all the love and hugs. Be kind to yourself, you absolutely deserve it xxx

@abbiestandidge6878 Ай бұрын

Thank you so much for sharing this!! It’s refreshing to see this type of video and it’s nice to be reminded that influencers are just normal people with issues going on in their personal lives🥰 don’t think I’ve interacted with you on here before (maybe on instagram!) but feel like this video deserves it💕 I’m glad you’re doing better x

@Tanya291459 Ай бұрын

Your honesty is so brave 🥺 i’m defo more of a silent watcher but im always watching because your videos are my comfort - I would love to see you doing some gaming though that would be so much fun! ❤

@kerrygreen5342 Ай бұрын

Thankyou and you are more then liked, you are loved by so many and don't ever think that you are not enough, you are enough, stay strong and keep being you, you have a fantastic personality from what I see and I wished I had a friend like you xxxx

@BeautyInBing Ай бұрын

Hey girl....hey Silent subscriber here and have been a scriber for many, many, many yrs. I am so beyond proud of you. Thank you for opening up and we have your back. New beginnings are scary but if you dont try your failing. You can do this and we believe in you, I believe in you always. 🥰💜

@lisapierzyna2073 Ай бұрын

I have been watching you for a long time and I genuinely wish the best for you and that things get even better than they have been before everything fell apart. Life is crazy like that sometimes but the most important thing is that you took your time off and reset yourself. Social Media is wild but I think that you could literally post whatever you enjoy and your followers will still watch it since we love you for your personality and not the type of content you film or the setup you have. You could literally open a gaming channel and I'd be hooked 👀 All the love and to a new start 🙌🏼💖

@Racheel24 Ай бұрын

Literally love you so much, watched you for years and always felt a connection with what you were saying. I have recently been diagnosed with ADHD and lost my mum 15 years ago now. You are an inspiration and I see a lot of myself in what you say ♥️♥️ thank you

@alexishawkes Ай бұрын

I’ve discovered your channel in the last day and this is my first video however, I wanted to share the love with you ❤ Well done you for all of your disclosures and for getting help. I too have been dependent on alcohol or cope with my emotions and know how hard this is xx I can totally feel you on the ADHD, losses, stresses etc xx

@bethwednesday3679 Ай бұрын

YESSSS STEPH! 🥳 Just sat here cheering you on and rooting for you SO HARD. I’ve watched you for years and this actually made me so happy for you. You’re so strong for coming out the other side so positively and I know you’re about to have the biggest life glow up ❤ So excited to see what’s next for you 🎉

@sophietucker1834 25 күн бұрын

Thank you so much for being so open and refreshing Steph, i have very recently lost my Mum too and feeling totally lost, so seeing your bravery and strength after going through those traumatic things is really admirable ❤ xx

@brookieleighj.2422 Ай бұрын

I feel you Girl! I also had a deep 2 month depression that I almost didn’t make it out of… your openness is appreciated and relatable on a whole different level I wish you nothing but the very best You deserve it ⭐️

@xanthehawksley-walker2591 Ай бұрын

I started watching you for the tutorials and reviews - you’re great at them - but you’re basically the only makeup KZfaqr I still like, because you’re authentic and funny and charming 💕

@coleoftheball Ай бұрын

Steph the way you act in your videos as your true self was a huge part in me deciding how I wanted to be in my own videos! Sending you lots of love, do what is right for you not what is right for everyone else ❤

@rlschmeltz Ай бұрын

Thank you for being you! I’m sure I’m not alone in saying I can relate to you. From feeling like the ugly duckling and not fitting in growing up to losing a parent way too soon, I related to the feelings and thoughts you talked about. It’s nice to know we aren’t alone and your bravery in putting yourself out there will help others not feel alone. I’ll be keeping you in my prayers and am excited to see all you will do!