I remember about a decade ago I was at a show and overheard some people talking about FFDP. One of the women there explicitly said she would sell her soul to/for Ivan Moody… my heart goes out to her and hope she’s turned her life around lol

It's unfathomable to me how successful these guys are while I watch talented bands struggle.

"This is their 9th album/hate crime" as a person who enjoys some five finger death punch that shit made me giggle like a little school girl 🤣🤣🤣

Heavy music for people that watch the Grammys

As a young teen, I can say I liked 5FDP, which i quickly grew out of once I discovered bands like Cannibal Corpse and Immolation. Their music is not just trash, but the entire landfill of garbage.

Thank you for your sacrifice to bring us this review. Much love to you guys! Stay safe seek therapy if needed, mental health is important. Looking forward to the next one 💜🤘🏽

I was in my local record shop today and somebody's poor mother was in there picking this album up for their son.

I know you guys suffered a lot by getting through this whole record, but these negative reviews are so much fun to watch xD What band discography are you guys ranking next? \m/

Have y’all noticed the skulls on your table look like the skull on the afterlife cover?

Well. Out of morbid curiosity, we KZfaqd the album after watching your review. Around track 5, my wife went to another room to watch cartoons with my little boy. I survived to track 7 before I broke. I salute you guys for suffering through the entire thing. I just can't do it.

Hey guys! Actual FFDP fan here and I can fully agree with this review. It is sad to see how hard this band has fallen off even if they never were really that great of a band to begin with. I am on the subreddit and the album leaked back in June and all the fans were in pure shock at just how bad the album was and most saying they liked 4 songs at best. It’s blatantly obvious this band is horribly toxic and can’t stand being in the same room as each other and they are just trying to cash in till Ivan pulls some other shit because Sobriety clearly has not calmed him down.

Came here after your references in the Sleep Token review to relive this fun 😂

Hey guys, thanks for this video. I’m in the hospital for vitamins and to rehydrate so the content really helps and keep me laughing. All is well though! On the mend. Just thank you guys from the bottom of my heart, without being able to mix music or watch reviews I would lose my goddamn mind in here. Peace! 🖤

I'll always have an interesting relationship with FFDP. In 2007 when I was 13, their debut album really opened my eyes to harsh vocals and heavier metal in general. Such potential. It really is a shame that they've become a parody of themselves. I do believe they're all pretty damn solid on their instruments! I've never even had a problem with Ivan Moody's voice. He's got a great, husky baritone and can be pretty versatile. It's his lyricism that has destroyed all of this band's integrity over the past 10 years... I can do without his big dumb mouthy meathead attitude and antics too. Dude's a serious clown. Though I still do find at least a handful of decent songs on each new record they drop if I feel like shutting my brain off and feeling like an angsty shithead for a few minutes... 🤷

I’m so sorry guys. I’ll send flowers to each of your families.

I salute you for having the courage to actually listen to that whole album

I know they're a joke now, but there was a time when 5FDP made at least respectable music. War is the Answer is actually still one of my favorite albums, and I'll defend it and The Way of the Fist. Like, you can't say that the lyrics to Far From Home aren't pretty great, (and leagues better than anything they write now). But yeah, 5FDP are taking cringe to whole new levels nowadays. I just try to remember what was and ignore what now is.

I hope this album is as great as Six Feet Under - Nightmares of the Decomposed. That album was a MASTERPIECE 👀🙃

Love the shirt, Jon! RIP Riley Gale.

Oh man, I haven’t laughed so much in a while. I really was in tears during this review. Thank you for making my day. I have not heard a single note from this band. They just look like something I would never be into. After listening to you guys, I have a morbid curiosity to check them out 😬

I knew there was a reason I love this channel. Great accurate review.

I was at Walmart the other day and saw an exclusive Walmart blue pressing of this album. It was the most FFDP thing I’ve ever seen

Great review 😂 Fortunately, I’ve never listened to FFDP because I can kinda tell what it’s gonna sound like based on their looks and the look of their fans 😵‍💫😅

I 100% have no idea why some bands like this get so many fans when there are so many more better metal bands, who can play better, do better vocals and write intelligent smarter songs that get close to no attention, it literally blows my mind. I once had an argument with a 5fdp fan where I was told if I like pantera I should like 5fdp because they sound pretty much the same, I don't know how many drugs and monsters he had consumed that day, 😂

There were so many quotable one liners in this review that I legitimately fell over from laughter. FFDP are an enigma to me and I'm puzzled how anyone likes them. To each their own I guess. Thanks for this review - it was pure comedy gold. 😂

I always wonder how really good musicians feel when they join a bad band. Like John 5 with motley crue

I was in high school when these guys were coming up,. There was one point in my life that I actually thought that FFDP was a halfway decent band. Now that I look back on it, I do not know what I was thinking. This is like music that is like "I am so tough. This is what metal is and should be." I am sad to admit that I found these guys before Pantera, Lamb of God, Machine Head, Down, Cannibal Corpse, Decapitated, Possessed, etc. Around 2013, something happened where I started to discover all of these amazing metal bands and I realized that FFDP puts on this facade that they are a metal band for real metalheads...and they're not. I don't know what I was ever thinking. I put on this new record and I turned it off. It's an awful, overproduced, crappy lyrical mess that I will never listen to again. If you are a fan of this band, cool. For me, I am glad I discovered all the other bands above and I left behind this joke of a band. P.S. I still watch Thralls of Metal every week. Work has made it to where I cannot view the live premiers. However, you guys still rock. Keep rockin' and giving me awesome metal videos, but please not with this band ever again hahaha \m/ \m/

I've missed your trolling. Obviously I love your normal content, hence why I keep coming back, but seeing you guys talk shit about bad albums is genuinely fucking brilliant. After watching you guys rip the fucking shit out of this album for 20 minutes I can honestly say this is my new favourite video on your channel. I didn't think you could shit on anything in a review as much as you did for Six Feet Under, but I was sorely mistaken! Fucking bravo guys, fair play for getting through the whole thing. I look forward to the next actual review where hopefully you can put this absolute travesty out of your heads 🤣

My sister has been trying to get me into FFDP for years, and I have disowned her every time they release a new album. Looks like she is gonna have a lonely Christmas this year.

If a tree falls in the forest and no one is around to hear it, then have we found the perfect location for a Five Finger Death Punch concert?

I'm glad I finally watched this video. I, of course, have complete disdain for this band, but you guys saved it. Very funny stuff! I spent a decade as a strip club DJ in Flint Michigan and had to play plenty of this awfulness. Every time I dropped the proverbial needle, I exited stage left and burned a left-handed cigarette. They owe me pot, too!

I forgot to say in my first comment that you guys earned a sub, you got a great sense of humor and good chemistry. Keep doing what you're doing brothers! And nice maiden flag, up the irons 🤘

The last three FFDP albums were an absolute *DUMPSTER FIRE!* Also, I saw FFDP twice, first time was at the 2013 Mayhem Festival with Amon Amarth, Mastodon and Rob Zombie [who headlined] and second time was in Abbotsford in 2016 with Papa Roach [who were ABSOLUTE SHIT!] Toward the end of Papa Roach's set, a dude to the right of me in my section was both hammered AND high! During the intermission between Papa Roach and Five Finger Death Punch, the dude *PUKED HIS GUTS UP* on the floor in my section and the dude's sister came around, helped him out of his seat and took him home. By the way, this sucks more than anything that has ever sucked before!

I was waiting for the 5 stars. You got TWO of the red handprint skull things from the cover on your table

LMAO. I dont even think its 5FDP music I hate. Its not good at all, thats for sure, but I believe its the fan base that has made me despise this fucking band more than anything. Edit: No, I hate Juggalos more than anything, but 5FDP fans are a close second.

Listened to this, lyrics are shit indeed. Had to listen to the sick the dying and the dead to get some form of appreciation of life again

Would you believe this is the review that helped me find this channel. I'll just say this, in terms of five finger death punch, I like their first 2 albums, but going into the 2010s they fell off hard. This video is still hilarious months later. Also poor Andy James

Also Nick's Ivan Moody impression was spot on 😂

I still enjoy the first 2 albums from this band, what a shame they never returned to that sound

Welcome to the Circus contains the lyric "Hang your hat and hate at the door"

I remember hearing my first 5 finger song and it was happily my last, not sure which song it was. It was on some video and I voiced my dismay only to be confronted with die hard fans stating that they liked heavy music and I somehow was not part of the club. Amen

Ok, hear me out; Would you rather listen to AfterLife, OR listen to a Graveyard Classics record where SFU just covers songs from St. Anger, Illud Divinum Insanus, AND a FFDP song or 2 as a bonus?

Any thoughts on the brilliant new Five Finger Death Punch album?

This reminds me of how I felt about Korn in the late 90s ... not the music, i mean your review. I haven't listened tot he music. i think i heard one of their songs once, but this is so far out of my proverbial wheelhouse, and, I suspect, that of most metalheads as well. Do you guys legimiately have fun doing these kinds of reviews? if so, cool. I sort of question why metal fans even bother talking about music like this. i was struck though by something you guys said -- is this really what the average person thinks metal is now? I always thought of metal as being very literate, mostly made by people into interesting cult genre stuff, ancient history, and the like. Not ... whatever this is. Also, I enjoy you guys a lot, but I'm afraid to hit the like button on this video because I know I'll start seeing this band showing up everywhere afterwards thanks to the algorithm.

This review is a work of art. It's your Mona Lisa. Well done.

Is it weird that I now want you to rank their full discography ? Great video, guys !

Bollocks. FFDP are quite good. I thought you'd both be wearing your FFDP t-shirts for this video?

Is it possible that Five Finger Dick Punch In the Fart Box actually is a laxative orchestra? Like, that’s their whole purpose? If so, you have to review their "music" from another perspective.

If this "band" is the best that Vegas can do, then Las Vegas needs to stick with gambling and casino buffets

It’s ironic that you have the five finger death punch skulls on your desk but you are shiting on the band

I was listening to a song on KZfaq, it was so terrible KZfaq recommended Nickelback and (I can't believe I'm saying this) I enjoyed the new Nickelback song way more that one. My point, I admire your strength having to suffer and deal with this stink hole of an album just to bring us this review.

I tell ya, they're okay sometimes, but unfortunately, they should not be in the same category as those of Megadeth and System of A Down, but that's me🤷...if y'all are interested, one of the greatest metal songs I've ever heard is "Cities of Smoke" by Soothsayer

I come back to this video every couple of weeks and recommend it to every metal fan I know. It is the GOAT of trolling reviews 🤘

Still waiting for Megadeth to say "we're not actually opening for these guys this fall" 😭😭😭😭😭

Is it weird that the skulls on your table look like the skull on the album cover

How do we get in touch to have you guys review our music? We just finish collaboration with Tim Ripper Owens!

I remember discovering ffdp back in 2007,their first album was good I used to listen to it non stop...The second album was good too but from there it went downhill..

I feel like Alex Jones wrote the lyrics for this album

Can't wait for the 5 Finger, Stained and Nikelback tour.

Jon: "mr. all of you." 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 Best line ever.

Y’all crack me up lol I was laughing my ass off driving home listening to this review 😂

Me and my friend are dying laughing at this review 🤣🤣

Now, are you rating this trash because you don't like it or because the whole scene hates Ivan Moody?

Oh man that Jammin Jon shirt... Definitely one of the biggest losses in metal over the last years! :(

Bro metal

My buddy asked about seeing Megadeth, but I didn't want to spend $100 if Five Finger Death Punch was headlining (I just don't know anything about them). Sounds like a dodged a bullet. Weird thing is I CONSTANTLY get articles and interviews about them showing up on social media for whatever reason.

I can watch this review forever. Never laughed so hard in my life. Well done, b'ys...

5 finger death punch is a band someone gets into when you don't have an older brother or sister to help guide you. Or no friends. FFDP is what school shooters listen to. I use powerslave to cleanse my speakers.

"Five Finger Cousin Fuck" 🤣

Options ..everyone has one.. I respect yours …but that’s yours not mine

This has to go down as the absolute greatest album review in the history of mankind. If you guys weren’t legends already, this got you there. Well fucking done boys, I salute you! CHEERS!! 🤘🏻🤘🏻

BWAAHAHAAAHAHAAA!!!!! That is the best score I've ever seen for an album. 👏 👏 👏 A 2 liter of dip spit, and Jon, "I was molested. In the ears. By this band." Haha!!!! I'm dying you guys. 🤣 I give your review of this album a Spine Tapping 11/10. 🤘

This has nothing to do with the album but I thought you might like to know (Ted Kirkpatrick from tourniquet passed away yesterday)

I’m seeing both nights of metallicas 72 season tour First night with mammoth and the pantera celebration was fantastic. All 3 bands killed it. Zakk is a shred God. Dime would be proud and Phil sounded fantastic I enjoy ice nine kills, but since my dad doesn’t care for them, we’re arriving right as their set ends. Unfortunately we’ll have to put up with a whole hour long set of ffdp before Metallica. I’m ready to laugh

I thought they looked like a street gang from a Sherlock Holmes adaptation from The Asylum

Never heard the band. Really. It appears not many like this band. The band did play a free concert June 2010 at my Army base in Germany. They even let German locals come to the concert. I didn’t go, as I was getting ready to go to Afghanistan. At least they did something nice for the troops.

Would love to know what that song was in the beginning of the video

Only have been a fan of a few select songs (popular ones, Wash it All Away, Bad Company, Jekyll and Hyde, Wrong Side of Heaven) but even with no thoughts before hand and open mindedness I've still come to only enjoy 2 songs, Welcome to the Circus and Roll Dem Bones. Not even lyrically, just instrumentally. Normally when I listen in to an album, worst case scenario I enjoy half the album, but this is just so much worse and liking the popular songs so much I expected better.

9:29 The next FFDP album should be titled "Edgy As A Beach Ball".

Just when you think it can't get any worse something wonderful happens..it ends

Five Finger is one of the biggest embarrassments to all of us that live in Las Vegas. one of the lamest bands ever.

At least with Nightmares Of The Decomposed by Six Feet Under, most of it was so bad that it became unintentionally funny. This album on the other hand is not funny whatsoever. It's just off-putting and makes you genuinely angry. I'll never understand how this band has such a big following. So much "Bro" bullshit with them, just can't stand it 😒

The only band I hate more than Nickleback . As bad as suicide silence and asking Alexandria.

Me being a FFDP fan I find this hilarious seeing as FFDP brought awareness to veterans, and did alot for them. But it's there opinion not mine. P.S I like ICP Also I do agree, there old stuff was way better. But Wrong Side Of Heaven was amazing. Sadly Afterlife feels like a parody, there new stuff is ass tho

I’ve had this album on repeat for about 2 weeks so damn good

Butt country... Florida Georgia Line. They're basically the 5FDP of country. Either band is most frequently heard blaring from a Carolina Squatted Ram diesel with the tow mirrors permanently flipped up. Also... Five Finger Death Punch sounds like a weird sex thing. "Gave my old lad"y the five finger death punch last night.

Nick: “I legit thought I was listening to the beginning of an ICP album” shit had me dying 😂😂😂😂😂😂 that’s great🤣 fuck this band bro

I feel bad for Andy James, but I’m happy that he’s getting a free paycheck.

So, what actual problems do yall have with the music? Because I'm hearing a lot of petty insults but not much actually about the music

The Billy Madison reference, outstanding. 🤘

Nope. I'd rather listen to Fran Drescher screaming the Sanskrit slphabet after a 6-week helium binge. Yall are twice the man i am.

Ill be honest i dont think I’ve listen to any of their albums before. Really don’t know much about them. But they do have a shit ton of hit singles that are like top whatever on the music charts or whatever ya call it over the years.

My condolences to you guys for listening to this album. I wouldn’t be able to make it through it. I’d rather spend over 40 minutes enjoying myself watching this review back to back, rather than waste over 40 minutes listening to this album. I haven’t had any interest in this band since I was back in high school, and it’s going to stay that way.

Well, not all Kyles. I couldn't name a single 5FDP song. How bad could it be really. Is this album worse then Lulu or Risk or even Twisted into Form.

Yes I did enjoy this! Whenever I need a decent laugh, I'll put this video on because it's hilarious. Listening to you guys trash this awful record makes my day! 😆😆😆

I'll force y'all to listen to it again

I'm not sure you guys are qualified to review an album by a band you legit hate. You're always going to have the biased opinion regardless of how "good" or "bad" it might be. I liked FFDP's early albums. Though I was put off when I saw them live in 2013. They played all their melo stuff instead their hard hitting bangers that would get a pit going. Very lame show. So I agree with most of this. But one thing you've both inspired me to do is give Avenged Sevenfold a chance. I view them in the same light you do with FFDP. The Justin Bieber of metal in my opinion is Avenged Sevenfold. But I will listen and see what the fuss is about. Still a ripoff of the Overkill logo.

Lol....another great review to brighten my day! Thank you!

So sick of feeling like a metal elitist when I cringe at "metalheads" liking this band. If they have never heard a good band in their lives I could understand but some people that listen to actual metal enjoy this butt metal. Its just insanity!

OMFG I can't wait!!!! 😆🤣🤣🤣