"A lot of kids grow up managing their parents emotions." So true! This is why healing is so important and taking the time to process our emotions and self-reflect/course-correct is so important before getting into a relationship or having kids. This is the exact reason why children grow up and have to seek therapy to recover from their childhood because two parents didn't heal before having them.

This is why I keep my legs closed. Men don’t understand me when I tell them I’m good on having casual sex or just sex in general. I will never have kids. And I’m not even sad at that. I rally behind marriage. But unfortunately, I don’t think I’ll get married personally but I think I’m good even on that too. People can pick their partners but the kids can’t pick their parents. I’m very self aware of these curses in our community. This is sad.

That little child must’ve been so frightened and utterly confused. Those parents are childish as heck!

I don’t think they realized that makes the child feel unwanted 😢

You have to love your children more than you dislike the other parent

You said it: one of the things I hate most about toxic relationships is the fact that the children have to manage the parents emotions. A lot of parents out here having children and don’t even like children!!! 🤦🏽‍♀️😡 Make it make sense!!!! Just out here perpetuating the same ole toxic BS. And the children end up carrying all of that. Aren’t y’all tired of the dumb stuff?! I blame US, black people - not the white man, white woman or anyone else. We have to take responsibility for our own dysfunction. We gotta HEAL 🙏🏽

Throwing a child back and forth like it’s a hot potato. And I doubt whatever the father had planned was more important than his daughter.

Tony Gaskins is a black man who is married, believes in God, speaks on relationships and made an important video directed at men about how they are living and what they can do to improve our community. Please have a look and share because it is an important message, you both are vital to the survival and healing of our community!!

I've done some stupid things, but getting pregnant wasn't one of them!

“We have met the enemy and he is us."

I keep saying this and people look at me crazy when I say I don’t want any kids 🙄

My momma did the same thing with me and my little sister. We lived in Dallas and our dad lived in Oklahoma. She drove all the way there, dropped us at the door, and sped off. He spent that summer agitated and we spent that summer uncomfortable.

I'm a substitute teacher and I'm hurting for the youth.

Thank you so much for continuing promoting family especially the Black family

This is why i am not having children.

It’s really sad. Little kids might not understand words and intentions but they understand moods and vibes. God forbid this little girl will grow up thinking she isn’t enough and seeking male attention, all because her parents put her in this situation.

I’m glad you have this channel. Hopefully some young men will find it.

I don't know where and why BP went so wrong with family

The broken cycle syndrome. I learned the hard way too and am a woman. Broken but not Destroyed.. Healing self

I hate toxic relationships because of this very reason. The poor baby doesn't know how to respond 😢

We arectoo selfish as humans. One of the things I always thought of was is this the man that I want to he my child's father. Can I depend on him to be there if I can't. It's all nice to say we're young and having fun but all our actions have repercussions. Stop robbing children of a healthy and normal life

This is crazy, I would never, ever leave my baby in this manner. It sounds like the father doesn't really care for her either. This is deplorable 😤

As an adult who comes from a family that put the dys in dysfunctional, I have been a very intentional parent. Both of my children are accustomed to being adored, valued, loved, guided, and accepted fully. They are well-rounded, confident people who know their immeasurable value. I made a point of parenting 180 degrees differently than what I experienced. Both parents came from ishy families and worked hard to keep that trash in the past. When you become a parent, your life is no longer yours. Whatever you desire for yourself takes a backseat. It is your job and primary function to nurture that little human you've brought here. You are charged with ensuring that these children are: Loved, fed spiritually, mentally, and physically; safety and security are not optional; understand that you are a living example to these young ones. It is not about perfection. We will never achieve that. Still, we can always do better. Having had a terrible childhood is no excuse for not doing the work on yourself so that your children do not carry family trauma and curses that you should have ended.

That’s so sad smh.

So painful to watch...messed up.

I totally agree with everything you said. To me it’s an all around sad situation, for both the parents and the child involved. I’m not excusing the parents behavior and neither am I justifying it but I try to look at things in different perspectives to “understand” why people do and think the way that they do. I see within this context, the parents who are unknowingly carrying and living out traumas that they have learned and picked up from their childhood that they have not yet acknowledged, accepted or properly healed from. Those same habits and behaviors that are within them are being subconsciously passed to their child in which she will also grow up believing is normal when in reality it’s not, thus the cycle continues. But there is hope! Healing can occur and you said something that was key which is having a relationship with God. He is the foundation that can take your broken pieces and make them beautifully whole again. I was once upon a time broken too but when I went to Him I became whole. We gotta pray that people seek Him because when they find Him, they find themselves . ♥️

My parents used to be like that. They were unable to talk or be in the same room after their divorce. Dad used to not even drop me of in the right street but one street behind it so he would be 100% sure he did not have to see mom. When he came to pick up me and my sister up he first drove by the house and then parked his car way out of sight again. It was super stressful. Children don’t understand that stuff and start to get a dysregulated nervous system/ problems sleeping/ lack of focus in school/ less able to form stable friendships and relationships. I’m chronically ill now at 29 and I’m not sure I would have been sick if I did not have so much stress in my childhood. Thanks for speaking up and focus on the children.

To all the single mothers. I understand it’s hard having deadbeat baby daddies but do not I repeat do not ever force these childish toxic asx ppl to be in your children’s life. These ppl will emotionally, physically & mentally abuse your children. Trust me it is not worth it in the long wrong. As a single mother who myself has this toxic ex I’ve learned that you just have to sacrifice a lot if you truly want to break the generational curses that these ppl can lay upon your children. If they don’t want to help raise their children fk them. Let them vibrate away, put them on child support and raise your children correctly & lovingly. Good things comes to those who wait. God just may send you an amazing wife or husband who will love you and care for you and your children. Just sacrifice don’t force these toxic connections.

Amen. The Children matter too. People sometimes get so selfish that they make the situations they're in about themselves and the person they have a problem with. And the child is left to put together the pieces of what's going wrong in their lives, instead of getting the full support they need.

Praise report! My daughter headed out the door to school asked me, "Mama, what's the name of that KZfaq channel you had on?" (referring to your channel) She was in a hurry & didn't have time for me to write it down as she had to catch the scho bus. I told her I will text it to her. By the way, she's an 18 yr old senior in high school. Just sharing to let you know that your messages are not falling on deaf ears. May God give you strength & self control & passion to keep doing what you're doing.

Merry Xmas 🎄 blessings and peace ya'll thank you, for your inspirations

Many of these are in 2 parent households

This needed to be said. Thanks for sharing!

*this is how kids become angry with the world or end up unalive cause of rage if a mother or father doesn't want a child/children THEN DON'T FORCE IT!!!! too many people end up snapping and take it out on the kid

And if it just doesn't work out, you have a way better chance of being very successful co-parents.

It appears that way but I have seen plenty of people from all backgrounds walk away from toxic people. Family and all. Because breaking the cycle is more important than proving to other adults who choose to remain unhealthy who matters more to you. My children,their peace and protection is my main goal. That doesn't change with age. Now that mines are adults I wouldn't allow any form of abuse in my life or home. That way I don't risk their lives,mines,or anyone else's. Who I bring into my life affects my adult children as well. I am allergic to destructive and unhealthy friendships or relationships. I prefer to remain single and have 1 true friend. Before I settle for hazardous conditions.

I didnt answer the door one time when my daughter's Dad was bringing her back. I was tired hungry dealing with losing a job due to childcare issues and was tired of him saying hes babysitting. He beat my door down. It hurt me to watch him take his neice and nephews to their events but deny anything extra with ours. Fast forward to now. We still cant discuss the needs and desires of our child in life and opportunities we want our child to have and she gonna be a Jr in High School. Shes embarrassed by the way he overlooks me when shes celebrated/ rewarded for her academics at school. She like well i guess ima have 2 graduation parties and have 2 cars cuz i already know... I feel like i failed cuz she living the l never wanted MY child to have. I even went as far as staying local so he couldnt use distance as another dismissal. So shed know her family. But i wonder if it has stunted us in one way or another. She live like a Queen with him while i struggle. I don't ask for anything except collaboration and that aint even money majority of the time cuz i can go get that. My kid made the honor society and he would even stand in her other side to take a picture. That shit hurts me. She says its ok but what kid really thinks thats ok except one thats settling for whatever they can get.

Crazy circumstances, but unfortunately this happens when so called men aren't handling their responsibilities!

Parents need to be adults..

No mother should have to do this

So childish! Doesn’t even care what message she’s sending to her young child! 👎🏽

That woman had to run because if she stayed as usual, he would have hit her, attacked her or otherwise abused her. Her ch8ld is being FORCED to be there with the abusive father. We all know what is going to end up happening. We just don't know if it will be the mother, child or both that he will eventually kill. We literally see this every day and no one ever helps the mother and child.

Just keeping it real. I have had to do that with my youngest son. I have had to drop him off and pull away. It is sad and terribly ridiculous, but this really happens. It's deeper than the video can get into. There is no seeing both sides in many of these instances.

👍🏼💯

Women like that are stupid and immature..and just to think her kid had to watch this behavior. Just horrible.

The title already has a like. I hate that’s all I can do is “like” .

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Bro stop stealing my video topics ..hahahahaha