To the sister on this story: yes, your grandparents, uncles/aunties, mother, and father were all cowers and sh*tty. And you were brought up with no adult guidance. But when you realized that you were on the wrong path - you have many choices to navigate a prosper and happy life here in America. STOP reminiscing impossible dream. STOP chasing men that are garbage. STOP blaming your past. Seek mental and emotional counselor and learn to forgive yourself. I am confident that when you look outside of the box with open heart. You will see the hundreds, thousands, and millions of men on this earth who can help heal your pain and lift your soul. So, that you can move on and finally enjoy life with real love and happiness. Please women up and reach for the gold! Good luck to you!
@neauchiapajchia2525 ай бұрын
well life is what you make of it, sad story and you were dealt bad cards but but change ur mindset and move on
@missysmart86205 ай бұрын
Your life is what you make. Think positive and move on
@YeebLauj-tb3cw5 ай бұрын
Niam laus aw ua cas es koj txoj dab neeg nim zoo li kuv txoj thb o
@youavu14335 ай бұрын
Move on with your life, find happiness. Life is short.
@meemeeh335 ай бұрын
Gosh, this story is so depressing. Sending light and love!
@Shoua6085 ай бұрын
I’m sorry your life is so sad. Sister, you have choices, choose happiness. Stop living in the past. Move on. Sending you love and encouragement.
@tshausxyoojchannel38925 ай бұрын
tu siab kawg os mi muam
@Nobodyxxx6515 ай бұрын
You only have regrets because your life was not good.. you keep thinking that if you got him your life will be better but honestly it could be worse too..
@alisonyang66985 ай бұрын
The amount of confidence she exudes to think that her ex would come back to her is astounding. Let him live his life.
@sunflowers25335 ай бұрын
At first, it was a sad story but after she talking about her ex. Sound like she desperately want him back. That’s not going to work. He move on that is why he blocked you. Stop xa xov to him.
@TouMobile-cf6ih5 ай бұрын
Lawv aw thaum pom luag thov txhob thuam nb sib sib hlub os
@jackieyunan48994 ай бұрын
Khaws luag qub hluas nkauj los ua neej ces yeej tsis tau txoj kev hlub raws siab xav nawb cov kwv tij hmoob aw...
@m468hue55 ай бұрын
Tim koj niam tais thiab koj niam lawv txawm koj txiv tsis lees koj los lawv yuav tsum qhia koj tias koj yuav tsis tau xeem twg thiab xeem twg no paub koj niam los yeej liam hos koj niam tais los yeej phem thiab liam yam thiab nas txhob tusiab tias koj niam tais tsoo koj lub qe zoo dua thaum lawv paub qhov tseeb ces haj yam nyuaj rau koj nawb mog
@songyang81155 ай бұрын
We will never be able to find another love so loving again. Nothing compares to such a beautiful love. Kawg ua ib siab li koj hais xwb os mog. It's not your fault that they didn't inform you from the beginning. They hid it from you that's why koj thiaj ua yuam kev os. Only the broken hearted will understand the pain that you have to carry inside for the rest of your life. Hnub twg es yus lub qho muag qi mas yus mam hnov qab xwb.
@myprecious67515 ай бұрын
Sister, you need to stop obsessing over your ex, who is your same last name. It wasn't meant to be. STOP BLAMING your mother. She has her own miserable life. Your life isn't based on your mother's choices and decisions. Everyone makes mistakes. She's paid and suffered enough with her choices and decisions already. You need to let go and live your life. Your life is based on your own choices and decisions. Let go of your obsession. Love yourself and respect yourself. You can be happy without all that Hmong bs in your life. Your ex-husband is an A-hole. He knew your past and your love story. He still chooses to marry you. For him to keep harboring on you and holding your padt against you. He's not a real man. It's not like he's a freaking virgin. Count your blessings and celebrate that you divorced that p.o.s....with your current husband, you need to choose yourself over misery. Go build your life with your children and for yourself. Divorce your husband. He's not faithful to you, he doesn't respect you nor does he love you. Why would you want to hang onto misery? SISTER, YOU CAN BE HAPPY BY YOURSELF. ITS NO STRESS, NO HEADACHES
@simvang71015 ай бұрын
Txob tu siab os mog, kuv tseem hlub thiab nco koj os me nkauj hmoob. Es txua yam tseem nyob hauv kuv lub siab nawb mog.
@Mamakhaa5 ай бұрын
Omg 😭 hai tau tu siab kawg os…
@zoolikuv5 ай бұрын
This lady is trying so hard to get back with her ex-bf. Move on, stop living in the past. We cannot blame other people for our own actions.
@lillyheu19315 ай бұрын
Actually my thoughts
@nkaujsaiszimwang69904 ай бұрын
I would of said the same thing
@oppocsc4 ай бұрын
😢
@user-zj8cs5bi5d5 ай бұрын
Move on let go of everything in the past so life can bring you sunshine instead of past memories
@yilengyang33255 ай бұрын
Ua li koj niam tais hais koj yeej Liam li koj niam koj thiaj tau lub niag neej tsi tsheej ua rov ua rais mus txoj kev twg los mus tsi tau ntag lau
@missysmart86205 ай бұрын
Omg! That’s what I was about to say! Yog kawg lios.
@leelaiyah7895 ай бұрын
Twg tsis kom nws lam tau lam yuav txiv a, kuj maj ma nrhiav mam tham kom tau tus nws nyiam thiaj tsis yuav ke.
@yilengyang33255 ай бұрын
@@leelaiyah789 Yog kawg Peb ua neej nyob Txhob mai maj Txhob vwm Txhob xaiv tus ua los neeg xwb yus yuav Tsum xaiv tus yuav los nrog yus us neej es thiaj kawg tus poj hmoob Nov nws yeej tawv ncauj tsi mloog nws niam tais hais nws tsi mloog nws niam tais qhuab nws thiaj tau lub niag neej dev neej npuas lis nws nrog nws qhov muag puab Txhob muab liam rau txoj hmoo vim lub lub niag siab tsi tu ua dab tsi neej thisj tsi tsheej
@denisya49555 ай бұрын
😢😢😢😢😢
@maixiong94055 ай бұрын
Hoyo xab maim no tseg kiag yus tus muam thiab tus nus hauv tsev xwb mas
@xeevnploojxyooj23765 ай бұрын
Stopping regrets it, because wouldn't makes other happy any more, sorry doesn't so problem ok.
@Nana-ss1hy4 ай бұрын
Mloog zoo li koj tu x twb tsis k koj lawm os
@user-od4cw8tz3k5 ай бұрын
Nej comment ntawv hmooob es peb thiaj nyeem tau
@user-sb2jv3xw9v5 ай бұрын
Txhob tu siab os tus viv ncaus aw muab tso rau txoj hmoo os mog ❤😢😢
@genuanneli4 ай бұрын
Quit blaming your mom! It was your DAD that abandoned you two!!
@pajthao48135 ай бұрын
Txhob nkim koj lub neej rau ib tug neeg tsis hlub yus ma paub tias nws tsis hlub yus ces tso nws mus yus mam nyob nrog yus tej menyuam xwb mas cas ho tseem nyob yuav ib tug neeg es luag muab yus so taw xwb tsis tsimnyog qhov koj nyob uv ua mob rau yus
@Mai1nOnly5 ай бұрын
Your grandma should of told you from the start of your mom’s life. But I think it’s wrong to name your kids after your ex 😂
@MyConfessions5 ай бұрын
What a miserable life! Always living in the past. You need to learn to love yourself and move on from your ex husband and your ex lover. See the positive in life.
@cheexiong16345 ай бұрын
😢what a sad story
@pajrosedawb80475 ай бұрын
Can’t play victim all your life. Take accountability for the choices and decisions you make. Stop blaming others for your poor decisions and bad conduct.
@user-wy2us8ng2e5 ай бұрын
Me Viv ncaus aw, mus ua neej lawm ces tsis txhob nco 2 tej me qub lawm os, tau tus twg lawm ces hlub 2 tus ntawd lawm xwb es lub neej thiaj li zoo os mog.
@kouavang59285 ай бұрын
Lady, why stopping yourself to be full and happy just because of other peoples around you who destroyed your way of life. You can change to be the most happiest and successful person by not thinking about other people. You hold on too much and too long on this missing lover. He is just a person, which there are billions on earth. Move on. You destroyed your own life, other peoples only influence your life.
@toojlor88915 ай бұрын
🎉
@KosYaj-it6et5 ай бұрын
Hai tau tu siab ua luaj
@covfefesmama4 ай бұрын
Girl!!! Stop it 😂🤦🏻♀️
@Love98fire5 ай бұрын
Please stop.. stop blaming your mom for your failure and your divorce. Take ownership of your own life and faith. If you live your life blaming your mom you will never be happy. Just be happy your grandma took you in and love you.
@chialee34595 ай бұрын
So us hmong we have only 18 last name but it's okay for us to marry our 1st cousin, niece, and uncles just because they have different last names. That is too close instead of marrying the same last name. So why does it matter. Love is love.
@yerthor42075 ай бұрын
Ab ca kuv ho xav txawv as thaum yua paub hai tia Yog yu lub xeem lawm ce yu txaj muag thiab xu siab lawm Tsi nyiam nw lawm os ghov ua neej Tsi ntseg vim tham kiag Xwb twb muab niam tai rau lawv saib lawm ua raw nraim li Koj niam ne ce thiaj taug Koj niam txoj kev os txua tu thiaj yoog noob no vim tu twg lo tib yam ne Tsi tim txoj hmoo os tim yu Tsi ceev yu lub cev nkauj xwb xwb os mog
@Heartsdouna5 ай бұрын
Txhob tu siab os tug sister aw peb ua neej nyob ces xaiv tsis tau los yug os ua Ib siab tso koj tug hlua nraug tseg Kam tsi nyob yus Ib leeg thiaj tsis mob siab ntxiv lawm xwb os.
@tabathayang72175 ай бұрын
Tsi pub luag thaam ces kuj qha ua ntej thaum ntxub pob? Ua caag tug tais yuav phem ua luaj es txhooj kum tsi qha rua tug ntxhais tas nwg thaam tsi tau nwg xeem nua maj? Tim cov nam laug xwb mas
@pajthao48135 ай бұрын
Cas zoo li koj tseem pheej yuav nrhiav es rov tham Kom tau koj tus nus lod tsis tsimnyog koj ua li ko koj twb los yug tau ib pab menyuam lawm es xav zoo2 mog seb puas tsimnyog koj tos ib tug neeg uas luag twb mus ua neej zoo2 lawm vim luag yuav tsis tau ib tug neeg uas yog luag lub xeem vim yeej tsis yog lawm Cia nws nyob raws nws lub neej zoo2 xwb yus lub puas xwb txaus lawm mog
@sircha53045 ай бұрын
Kissing/loving cousin xu2 siab. Plenty of fish in the sea.
@su68005 ай бұрын
Someone once told me, families comes 1st. 🤷♀️
@saykaomee5 ай бұрын
You reminisced about the past and him, but does he care and feel the same? Your life is what you make of it, don't blame others and txoj hmoo.
@musibsim21515 ай бұрын
Yog yus hlub leej twg lawm tsis muaj leej twg hloov tau nyob hauv ntiaj teb no li os yuav tsum yog nws xwb mas thiaj hloov tau
@cookingcutiepieAI5 ай бұрын
What a sad story 😢
@nkaujsaiszimwang69904 ай бұрын
Move on woman. You can’t be living in the past like that.. you need to find someone who cab love you and accept you for who you are..
@waatchdogs61845 ай бұрын
Bogus! As long as he's not your blood brother you can date or married whoever! Is not ok to marry your 1st cousin!
@baylaoyang4455 ай бұрын
Taboo . Is good.
@oppolaos75895 ай бұрын
Txhua yam yog tim koj niam tai tsi qhia koj thaum ntxov koj lub neej thiaj yuam kev tag
@christinabthao88255 ай бұрын
Yog tshaj os
@caaspasvang74275 ай бұрын
Sister tos koj cov txiv tsi hlub koj los koj pheej coj koj lub siab nrhiav qub hluas nraug li koj ko ne
@nickiengiayang5 ай бұрын
Get over it! You will never be happy if you dwell on the past!
@dangyang26835 ай бұрын
Tus ntxhais no tsis muaj kev txhaum. Qhov teeb meem no tim tus niam tais tsis txkawb nqa thiab tsis qhia nws xwb. Us li cas tsis pub yuav xeem ntawd cas tsis cob qhia tus me ntxhais thaum nws yuav nto nkauj es yuav pib nyiam hluas nraug ntawd. Yog li tus tub hais lawm tsuas yog me nyuam hluas nraug xwb , saib ntaub ntawv tsis yog yus xeem ces yuav tau xwb. Cas yuav muab tus me ntxhais rhuav ua nws lub neej nyob txom nyem siab ntsws ua luaj.
@dinayoung47975 ай бұрын
Tus viv ncaus aw tus yus tsis tau ces txhob khwv xwm vim Neb yeej tsis yog txoj nkawm thiab tej zaum koj tau nws los koj yeej yuav ua poj nrauj nawb ces txhob vwm vwm koj tus qub hluas nraug tsam neej rov puas dua nawb
@pangvang23045 ай бұрын
Hlub tus koj tau thiab yog koj tus txhob muab tus yus tsis tau coj los ua kev muaj mob vim yeej tsis yog hmoov
@solomoua55205 ай бұрын
You should never marry your last name It’s wrong!!!👊 The one that marry their own last name is crazy 🫵🏼
@samlao24895 ай бұрын
Plab twb txaij npaum zaj lawm ces ua ib siab mas..
@Lisa_X55 ай бұрын
Get over your brother. Find your own peace and stop trying to find your peace in him.
@kuexiong14985 ай бұрын
damn all these years she still wanna taboo. wanting to get some loving from her own bro 😂. shitz is crazy
@ambervang80745 ай бұрын
The elders are to blame. They should have told you from the beginning instead of when it’s too late. Grandma told you when it’s too late and still blame you.
@yiatho88305 ай бұрын
Nrog koj tu siab ua luaj li thiab os es koj niag txiv nim xyeej tias koj tsis dawb huv es tsis hlub koj no es nws nim dawb dawb huv huv los nws nim tsis tau nrog hluas nkauj li os . Yog nws twb tau ua lawm thiab ces kuj sib phim xwb . Txiv neej hmoob no phem dhau lawm
@kenxiong55405 ай бұрын
PEB los kuj muaj tej zaj dab neeg li thiab tab PEB tsis tham xeem nawb tus xeem ces tham ces yeej yuav muaj kev tu siab thiab yuav nyuaj heev yog kuv xeem Lawm ces tseev nws zoo nkauj li nawb kuv yeej tsis Xav txog qhov yuav tham li
@minili8375 ай бұрын
Oh yo ua cas hais tias tsis thab lawv tej txiv los tseem xa tsab xov no thab lawv tej neej thiab lau. Tej zaum luag kuj mus ua lawv ib tus txiv tsev zoo es tsis yog neeg liam os. Tus qub hluas nraug aw, yus mus ua neej ces ua tiag tiag os. Hlub tus los xiam roj xiam ntshav yug tej pab niag menyuam rau yus xwb os, es thiaj li zoo nawb.
@maylovang18805 ай бұрын
Koj pheej hais rau rau nws es nws puaa mloog thiab puas hnov koj os me koj niam aw.
@yoglis93215 ай бұрын
Your story is sad, but your grandma is right married. Your own last name is not good. It is a shame I hope you will find someone who truly love you.
@mauziewowzie5 ай бұрын
Please make it make sense. Hmong people cannot marry people who share the last name, who is NOT related. But allow them to marry their own blood relatives of a different last name. Very dumb rule 🤦🏽♀️
@nkaujntse51965 ай бұрын
The title already tells me she is a stalker and crazy. Move on lady. Love yourself and your children.
@mayhlilee7465 ай бұрын
Is it just me, or did the title not match the story?
@pahouaxiong61425 ай бұрын
Tus leej niam koj twb hais tias koj tsis xav rhuav nws lub neej no? Uas cas tseem yuav sib tham sib paub nyob Facebook thiab? Yog twb txawj xav lis koj, ces nyob twj yam xwb, txhob cias koj txom nyem zaum 3 ntxiv lawm?l
@pkcyang29105 ай бұрын
Cas koj lub neej yuav tu siab ua luaj os tus viv ncaus aw. Lub neej cai xeem tsuas yog Hmoob xwb. Neb twb ua nkauj nraug pw2 uake lawm yog tiag ces yeej yog txij nkawm lawm. Neb kev hlub tsis loj txaus Neb thiaj tsis sib tau. Twb ua ntev2 lawm ces tig tsis tau sijhawm rov qab lawm ua ib siab lawm xwb
@maichang73385 ай бұрын
Please seek therapy to move pass this mental state of mind you are in. You are capable of being happy. There is nothing wrong with getting guidance to open your eyes to your life’s potential. Stop showing your kids that they need to bare the bad until the day they die. Hmong 75people mentality of “its destiny” and “baring the bad” is so destructive to one self.
@MissPeachie5 ай бұрын
I think you would still be divorced if you married him because as you both age, he will acknowledge that it’s a taboo. His parents will not accept you. It’s not your fault or his but it wasn’t meant to be so keep moving forward. I’m sorry you had a rough upbringing because of your parents’ dumb decision.
@MrsKervang5 ай бұрын
Your destiny is within your control! Stop dwelling on the past!🤦♀️
@tiachang-sn5ic5 ай бұрын
Sister stop 🛑 Move on stop waste ur life for other people don’t love u If they love u they will live by ur side If not it mean u nothing for them
@hlubyang40725 ай бұрын
Koj tu niam tais tsev neeg lo yeej khib xuab kawg li tiag...lawv twb paub tias koj tu hluas nraug thiab koj yog ib xeem lo tseem tsis cheem neb thaum pib thiab....tim koj niam tais lawv xwb
@missysmart86205 ай бұрын
Grandma did that’s why she couldn’t marry him.
@DandelionsrukMHI5 ай бұрын
You won't let go. It also seems like you need to take accountability for some of your actions, too, because not everything is entirely your "parents" fault. You complain about your new husband spending time with his ex and kids, yet you daydream about another man. Move on and focus on present time you, and your family. Don't waste your entire life dreaming about a married man.
@rosemaryyang40715 ай бұрын
If they were honest with her and gave her her rightful last name from the begining all this could of been avoided. It is the family fault she in this situation.
@samlao24895 ай бұрын
Nej cov poj niam nas....thov tsum nej lub maib ko thiab lau..tos lawv tsis hlub koj nas....get over with....damn....hahaha
@caaspasvang74275 ай бұрын
Sister so sad but Koj twb paub hais tias koj tus qub hluas nraug neb yog ib lub xeem xwb no you don’t need to msg him you guys nasty stuff for him
@user-zi4ck8bt7t5 ай бұрын
😢😥
@hova64215 ай бұрын
Niam laug ntsuab teev cag hmoob Mika eg yuav sib Nrauj sib Tso ua luaj thiab og cag yuav ua laib ua luaj thiab
@lubsiabzooyang28065 ай бұрын
Tsis yog Hmoob miskas xwb neej thiaj li puas thiab sib nrauj xwb. Lub ntiaj teb no yeej tseem ua lub neej sib nrauj sib tso. Lawv tseem ua yam phem thiab qias neeg tshaj Hmoob miskas lawm deb.
@pataoxiong5 ай бұрын
You lost Your first love due to others. Why did you force yourself to go with your 2nd man that you claimed you don't love and live a miserable life like? Maybe you're a confused woman 😢
@user-go7fd3ev2o5 ай бұрын
Taboo xwb txob sib yuav os.yuav tau txaj muah tawm rooj.yog neb tseem sib yuav ces koj tau los ua pojnrauj lawm thiab . Tseem yuav haj yam txaj muah.
@ThePrincessWorrior5 ай бұрын
Yuav tuc niag cousin ex husband ntawd mas thiaj yog taboo pob. That same last name lover was a stranger, it’s nothing tabooing
@kyoxi87365 ай бұрын
Lady, you an over thinker and can’t move on from your past, your feelings and emotions. When you really think about it, it’s NOT the man you missed, it’s how he makes you felt then. STOPPED trying to be a home-wrecker and tried to awaken an ex to give you hope or for him to come chase you, it won’t make your life any better! Be a better person and move on!
@user-kv4ey9ku9j5 ай бұрын
Sounds like a headache story, thanks for all the comments, will be skipping this one.
@ncouazooxwbya15525 ай бұрын
This is a Country of greatest opportunity and improving life for the better lady!! No wonder your life has changed because you live your life in the past!! Please move on forward and stop the regret of the lost boy friend of you. Just be happy for who you are holding right now and make a happy marriage with your man! stop missing that boy friend!! Stop lecturing him but look into yourself and fix your own heart!!
@chuvang54875 ай бұрын
Cov neeg hlwb tsis txwm 100 li koj ces txawm yuav pes tsawg tus txiv los lub neej yuav tsis tsheej tsis txog qhov twg ? vim koj muaj ib tug kab mob sawv nram tuab nruab siab ces koj yeej tsis xav los tab cuab vij zeej, tsis hais pojniam los sis txiv neej yeej tib yam nkaus. koj tus maum nkais ko tsis txhob khuv2 xim koj tus qub hluas nraug yog neb los sib tau ces xyov koj twb zoo li cas lawm ? tsis txhob muab liam rau txoj hmoo yog tim koj niam lub siab xwb. Hmoob twb ib txwm haistias niam txaij pliag ces nyuag txaij taws, lub txiv yeej poob tsis deb ntawm lub hauv paus ntoo, vim koj yog koj niam li roj ntsha ces neb thiaj li koom ib lub siab coj ib tug cwj pwm.
@flryprn7455 ай бұрын
Why old people have such hard time moving on?? Maybe find some hobby in life and don’t drill so much on love. There’s more to life than love.
@nkaujhmoob86jual725 ай бұрын
I feel that you had made a very poor choice from the beginning of your life. I think you blame others for your poor choices one after another. Peb ua neej nyob yog yus made wrong turn at the beginning then we lightly will take detour forever. Sounds like koj yog ib tug woman that tsis leem cai like your grandma said. Move on don't drag on the past.
@wiivang94885 ай бұрын
Stop this taboo nonsense
@sunnygirl9735 ай бұрын
Ntuj aw, zaj no mas so stupid. Koj lub neej puas yog Tim kojbxwb os. Txhob muab liam rau txoj hmoo os. Yus tsua nros yus ua yus xwb ne. Ruam tiag tiag. Txhob xav xav hais tias yog yuav tau koj ib xeem es yuav zoo zoo thiab no os. Ntshe yim huab txaj muag es yuav khiav nkaum lis khiav nkaum xwb xwb lis os. Kav tsij ua poj nraub twj ywm xwb os. Yog koj mus tham hluas nraug thiab yuav txiv ces lawv yuav nug koj lub paj vav ua ntej nawb. Ces txiv neej yuav tsis hlub koj nawb.
@YajMorey815 ай бұрын
You guys weren’t meant to be, move on geez.
@XxBubblegumxXthebest5 ай бұрын
koj lubn neej tsi muaj tus hlub tiag los vim koj tseem muaj txoj kev zais li ko. hnub koj yuav txiv lawm yuav tsum tso txhua yam kev nkauj kev nraug tseg es mus ua neej thiaj li zoo. kuv ntseeg tau tias yog koj tus txiv thib 2 no hnov koj zaj neej neeg tag ces koj kawg yuav rov ua poj nrauj dua nawb. Peb hmoob txiv neej lub siab txawv lwm haiv neeg lub es thov txhob hais txog nej tus qub hluas thiab txhob nco lawm thiaj li tsi mag ua poj nrauj dua nawb.
@elizabethvang1085 ай бұрын
Aub.....ntsej muag aub....aw cas tsis yuav txaj muag tiag2 li nawb koj mam lub ntsej muag tuaj plaub kiag li aub lub
Me ntxhais aw koj hais rau niam tais hais tias tam sim no yog tiam 21 lawm peb cov twb yuav thiab tub mus yuav nyab yog peb xeem ntxhais mus yuav vauv yog yus xeem .dab yuav quaj qhov twg tuaj.
@lubsiabzooyang28065 ай бұрын
Dab yuav tsis quaj qhov twg tuaj tab sis muaj ib hnub twg txoj kev ntxhov siab yuav tawm tuaj thaum lub neej muaj tub muaj ki.
@qaibhmongvaj5 ай бұрын
Get over it girl. Stop blaming your sgitty life on this relationship slipping
@bluewhisper50085 ай бұрын
In this day and age, there's no problem with same last name as long as you aren't related. It's not your fault you didn't know.
@maximuszone87215 ай бұрын
It is still a taboo today. It’s just that now a days the young people don’t care but just because they don’t care doesn’t mean it’s accepted
@bluewhisper50085 ай бұрын
@maximuszone8721 I don't see it as a problem because if they aren't related by blood why not? It's because hmong people aren't educated so they won't want to change but a lot of people are changing.