Txhob tu siab os txiv ntxawm aw koj cov me tub me ntxhais lawv twb yug tau ib leeg ib pab me nyuam thiab os mog koj cov me nyuam hlub koj li cas lawv cov me nyuam yuav hlub lawv ib yam li lawv hlub koj thiab os mog ntshe lawv tseem yuav txom nyem tshaj koj 100 npaug os mog

He has a lot of anger and resentment for having to bear the responsibility of being a father and dad at a young age. Put yourself in his shoe. He deserves happiness for once.

Koj hais yog kawg...koj cov me nyuam dev ntawv tsis txawj xav yog lawv ntshe lawv twb ua tsis tau npaum koj...I feel you!!!

Sad on all sides. Sounds like the mom and dad are glue together for the sake of the kids. Parents are aging and will be gone forever when their time come. Love and appreciate them the best way you can as life is indeed too short.

This guy is so full of BS. If you don’t love her, don’t mistreat her. Let her go.

I understand this story very well. My parents are in the same boat. My dad got forced to marry my mom, who was the brother's wife. My uncle passed away during the Vietnam war and my dad was forced to marry my mom. My mom was also forced to marry my dad. The cousins/relatives and family wouldn't allow the both of them to marry someone else. Whenever my mother tells her side of the story, she is still sad to this day. When my dad tells his side of the story, it's exactly the same like this guy who's telling this story. It's very true, if they both didn't get force to marry each other, they both would have had a better marriage or know to love the other. For the longest time, my dad was exactly like this guy who's telling this story. When you are force to marry a person without love and commitment, the relationship/marriage will always be rocky, tough, and suffering inside. Both of the party deserves happiness. It's very very hard when you see the good, bad, ugly of both your parents. Trust me, I'm the child, so I know what it feels like. I ask and wish that this tradition STOPs because it effects the whole family. No one should be force to marry the other if one of you or the other don't have love. My father finally stopped pursuing other women because he's now older and realized that we kids stressed him out enough already. There is no happy ending. I'm sure this guy deserves his happiness and the girl deserves her happiness too. I'm sorry this happened to you and to both my parents. I pray that one day your kids will realize and learn to you love. as for our family, We as the children love both our parents regardless because we understand it's very hard.

Those sons should understand how he been through his life not getting the one he loved and yet he still loves them and taken care of them until they become adults so don't disrespect their fathers cause what go around come around so don't think of the past......

Why stay with someone and have five kids? Nobody is holding a gun to your head to stay and make all those kids. It is partially your fault so if your kids don’t love you it’s your own making.

Koj pheej hais tias koj tu siab rau txoj kev niam tij txis kwv, es koj puas paub tias koj tus niam tij los yeej tu siab ib yam thiab na. Nws los tsis xav yuav koj ib yam tabsis vim raug cov laus yuam ib yam koj. Yeej tsis tsim nyog koj ua phem npaum no rau koj tus pojniam. Koj lim hiam tshaj plaws.

It goes both ways. He thinks he’s suffering but he didn’t think how much suffer the wife is also. He should have love the wife as she loved him too & quite complaining.

You use your anger and selfishness to cheat all your life and yet you're still upset that you didnt get the life you wanted. Your wife had no choice and no say for her sadness and anger, but yet she chose to love her kids and stay faithful for you. That's the difference that you will never understand as another ignorant hmong dude. Your kids are not wrong, don't blame them.

Brother I feel your pain and disgust. Your children are wrong and ungrateful and selfish. But alot of it is due to their mother who made them like that. God sees all brother. He'll deal with karma on those kid's. You are right in all that you said. No need to cursed them they'll meet their dimises...

I can't with this old guy. He is so full of himself. He's so selfish and self center. So you cheated on your wife while she remain faithful to you. And you expect your kids to be on your side? What about your wife, she had no choice and she's also stuck with you but she doesn't go around spreading her legs. I'm sure you must have done something bad to the point where even your own children doesn't care about you.

Koj puas tau rov qab noog koj tus kheej hais tias yog vim li cas tag nrho koj cov menyuam tsis muaj ib tug twg xav hlub koj? Txog txij cov koj yug kiag twb tsis muaj ib tug twg hlub koj lawm ces koj yeej tsim lawv niam nrog rau lawv txaus txaus lawm mog tus me leej txiv. Kheev lam hais tias cov koj yug ho hlub koj thiab no ces muab ua ib qho hais tab sis tag nrho koj cov menyuam tawm ntawm koj lub neej lawm ces txhais tau tias koj yeej tsim nyog nyob zoo li ko lawm. Txhob muab txoj kev foom los hais rau koj cov menyuam, koj tsim lawm txaus txaus uas lawv tsis muaj txoj kev zam txim rau koj lawm ces kav tsij nyob nrog tus poj niam uas koj hlub hlub ko es mam yug dua ib co menyuam los hlub koj mog.

Big brother, I feel your pain. Ntawm kuv, kuv xav tias tej laus ib txwm hais tias niam txiv zoo tam lub ntuj. Niam tij thiab tij laug zoo tam niam tam txiv, tsis tsim nyog muab niam tij txis kwv, vim nws zoo tam li yus niam lawm. Muam Phauj tsawm los tsawm nyog lawm.

No, matter what, if he's the person that give you life,or not, but he took care of you when your young, it's your responsibility to love and take care of this person that care for you, when your just a baby...karma it's real people, whatever you do to your mother or father, or someone that loves you and raised you.. karma will catch up to you ,some will happen to you this life, some will fellow you till next life...to the children of this story, this man raised ya'll, he never love your mother, it's because of old school set up.. it got nothing to do with ya'll, it's between your father and your mother..ya'll as children need to just love them no matter what....karma's a bitch,,better believe it...when your father's gone, trust me ya'll life will change,.I mean in a very bad way...

Kuv tsis paub tabsis kuv xav tias yog lawv chim npaum ntawv tejzaum koj yeej yuam kev lawm. Lawv tsis hlub tsis saib koj los lawv kuj yuam kev thiab. Yus ua yuam kev ces yus yuav tau txais qhov yus ua. Kuv yog ib tug uas twb yuav yuam kev rau kuv cov menyuam thiab, los kuv xav hais tias puam chawj thaum kawg lawv tsis hlub los kavliam no.

Ignored kids. Karma will caught up with them later. Parent relationships shouldn’t come between the loving of parent and kids.

When my older brother passed away in 2009, my relatives came to me and asked me if I wanted to marry my sister-in-law. I was surprised. I thought it was obvious to them that we don't do that in the US. My answer went something like..."What? No". One yawg even went on stage and said into the loud speaker that none of my brother's brothers want to marry her and if she sees anyone she likes, she can marry that person. I guess it's just custom but this goes to show that even in this day and age, the old people still want to practice it.

Tu siab kawg os me txiv hlob aw

Hmoob lub neej niam tij txis kwv yeej tu siab kawg. Tiamsis tsis hlub los txhob tsim thiab. Tej npam yeej yog tiam ntawv niam txiv tiag thiab es thiaj tau los sib sau ua neej.

This is probably how my dad feels cause he had to married his older brother wife.. but he still stay & care for his older brothers kid. Oh well life right... my dad never fully love my mom, but he didn't cheat he stayed until her last breathe. You should have just love your families & been there for them.

Txog txij koj cov me nyuam koj yug twb tsis hlub koj lawm thiab ces koj yuav tau mus tsom iav rov qab saib koj tus kheej zoo2 ua ntej koj yuav tu siab rau koj cov me nyuam yog niam tij cov ntxub xwb mas kon thiaj zoo ho koj cov twb ntxub lawm ces koj yeej phem xwb

omg is sad because your all the kids don’t understand how you feel 😢

Cov phoog ywj ..peb ua neeg nyob .. txog kev mob siab yog leeg twg tsis nyob qhov chawm ntawm ..yeej g kaj saib txog lwm tus txog kev mob ... hais txog koj cov menyuas ua yog koj yuj los yeej g hlub koj thaib os ...ua ib siab yus nyob yus os mog ...nyiam muaj nyiam thib

I feel like something is missing in the story. There has to be more then not loving their mom that made them so mad at you.

2 things: 1. I agree that people should not force marriage in any way. My husband’s grandpa had to marry his niam tij too. He ended up hating her and she became very mean and bitter. Then she treated by husband’s mom (nyab) very badly. Now my mother in law vowed to always speak nicely to her daughter in laws BUT she is very needy and clingy with her sons. Her kids were the only thing she hung on to. Forced marriages only end up with generational trauma. 2. The only way this story would be believable on what your kids hate you so much is if you were abusive to your wife. Physically and mentally. You may not have loved her but you probably didn’t treat her like a human, or you didn’t even try. Your kids had to look up to that. Remember that you are your kids’ first role model… they learn their hatred from you.

As a kid (I’m 40 now) the hardest thing growing up is when your dad was unfaithful to my mom. As kids, it breaks our heart too. Understand your kids.

Kuv los kuv ua ib yam thiab vim koj tsis hlub peb niam .thaum ub koj tsis nyiam koj kuj txhob yuav .

Niam ntsuab teev tus txiv neej no ruam dhau heev lawm tseem yuav Los Hai Los tawm thiab txiv neej no ruam dhau qhov ruam lawm

I feel really sorry for you. You deserve love too.

We understand your sadness but you’re not looking at both sides. Your wife didn’t have a choice either. However, you’re selfish and made yourself happy by having affairs and your wife stayed a good wife and mother. This is why your children are upset.

This is a hard situation but if I were the kids, I'd let him remarry as long as they have money to cover for funeral costs. My mil was dating at 70 and I was OK with her remarrying because we have life insurance for her and we weren't worried about her, but he passed away. Everyone is lonely and need a companion.

Hmoob txoj cai uas niamtij txis kwv mas quavdev tshaj tsis muaj lawm

Back then kids were afraid to be disowned by their parents but today generation, kids dont care. You and niam tij should have gone your own way after your parents passed away. You only think about yourself not your niam tij feelings.

Poor dad… the kids need to be more understanding

I wish his kids would put themselves in his shoes. He already explained it to him. Their dad deserves love and happiness too. I feel for this man.

I’d forgive him if I were the kids. We have one life to live, we should be able to be with the person we love. Not saying he is perfect but I understand his side too.

You make wrong decision in the beginning and didn’t realize what is right that why what you did to your wife come around back to you so don’t be too sad because you didn’t see your own karma

This do blame it all on her. Yeah seriously she was the one got forced and no choice but to marry him. Woman back then has no voice

Uncle aw, doesn’t matter if you were niam tij txis kwv or whatnot, she doesn’t deserve the disrespect that you’ve shown her. When she was your niam tij, you showed her respect, I wish you did the same when she was your wife. Even if you didn’t love her, at least show some great amount of respect towards your kids’ mother. She is not phem from not letting you marry a second wife, tus phem ces yog koj because koj tsim nws lub siab lub ntsws, kuv paub tias koj lub siab los yeej mag tsim thiab but it’s not her that tsim koj, it’s your relatives and your dad that tsim both of you. She could’ve married outside your family and could’ve received the love that she wanted but your dad wanted to keep her, so you can’t blame her, it’s your dad that you should blame. Food and shelter is not a way of showing your love, that’s a parents job to provide that and also provide love at the same time, just bc you shelter and fed them doesn’t mean you’re showering them with love, NO! It’s not that your kids didn’t warned about your ways of treating their mom, they did, just accept it, she couldn’t do anything but accepted the way you treated her.

That's why you need to be a man and stand up. Don't agree at the beginning. If you don't stand up for yourself and let others take control of your life. This is what happens. You didn't have to agree at the start. Stop worrying about your parents wish. It is wrong to begin with. Additionally these kids don't understand too. These kids don't know forgiveness. Old man live on your own with your new wife. Who cares about those kids. Karma will do it's work if you are good like you said.

Yawm txiv tsis txhob khib khib tias Koj cov me nyuam hlub lawv niam dua Koj os yog yus paub tias yuav khib li kov cas Koj tsis nrog lawv hlub lawv niam thiab es lawv thiaj hlub Koj thiab. Kuv xav lawm tias txog txij lawv tsis hlub Koj li tej zaum Koj yeej ua rau lawv tu siab rau Koj ntau heev lawm.

Cov me nyuam no tsis txhawj xav, yog lawv los lawv yeej u ib yam. if he is a good dad, than they should understand him.

Lawv niam hlub2 koj thiaj tsis pub koj yuav ib tug hos,vim yog tej laus yuam koj yuav koj Niam tij xwb cas koj ho tsim nws cas koj ho tsis tsim koj niam koj txiv xwb, koj hais tias yog nws hlub koj ces CIA koj yuav ib tug no mas tsuas zoo rau koj tog xwb os tus mi txiv tsev aw, us kom 2 tog yuav taus es txhob CIA zoo rau koj xwb mas😭😭

Peb cov txiv neej hmoob mas txhua txhua tus yog lawv tsi hlub leej niam lawm lawv yeej tsi hlub cov me nyuam ib yam qhov koj tias koj nem hlub hlub lawv yog koj dag xwb

I'm glad u finally got a chance to experience love once in this lifetime b4 u go. Everyone should. It's unfortunate that your deceased wife didn't.

You and your wife didn’t have a voice, it your parents fault, don’t blame on anyone but yourself, how can you not love her but have a lot of kids with her? If I don’t love that person I wouldn’t be having so many kids with that person

pab hlub kj kawg os yawm txiv tus yus hlub ua neej thiaj kaj siab os

My dad was the same who didn’t love us much but we still talk with him and visit him since we figure if it wasn’t for him I wouldn’t be here today. I forgive him as we all only live once.

Uncle.. I feel your pain but don’t hate your kids either. You should married your second wife 30 years ago but now I disagree with you. Nowadays kids don’t get AF how you feel, they only do what they see. Thought.

Clearly this story is the woman’s fault more so than the man’s fault at the beginning. She is so much older she could tell the family no I don’t want to marry my little brother-in-law. But she engaged in it they got married. Years of marriage even though they didn’t love each other they ; stay together because of the children. To them at that time it was the right choice to do even though both love nor respect one another. She said a lot of bad things about the dad to the kids to turn the kids against their father vice a versa. They both can call for the divorce but they didn’t. All the children are naïve, selfish, and not open minded about thier father’s happiness. The dad did his part of raising them. Show at least a little respect.

Tus txiv tsev aws nyias muaj nyias ib txoj kev tu siab lawm ces yuav kho tsis tau lawm. Yuav tu siab ces tsim nyog Koj tu siab rau koj Niam Koj txiv lawv muab Koj yuam yuav Koj Niam tij es koj thiaj tau txoj kev tu siab tas Koj lub neej xwb.

Tus txiv tsev koj nem tias koj tus niam neb tsi sib haum es koj tsav tsheb khiav los koj twb tsi muab lawv laij tawm qhob ntawm koj ntag qhov koj tsi tau kev hlub na thaum koj khiav mus tsheej as thiv lawm tsi quav ntsej tej me nyuam yuav tuag tshaib los tsi quav ntsej tsuas tshuav lawv niam thiaj yog tus nrhiav rau lawv noj xwb . Niaj hnub no lub ntuj thiaj cia koj tshai pauj ntag

Kuv xav hnov 2 tog lus, 1 tog xwb tsis ntseeg, nyias ua rau nyias ris xwb, tsis hlub luag txog txij lawv tsis hlub sov loj puas lawv thiab vim koj hais tsis tau 1 los lus tias koj hlub lawv li cas thiab hais tsis tau 1 los lus muaj chaw txawb cbaw rau koj yog leej txiv rau cov me nyuam txiv hom coob uas lawv tsis hlub tus niam ces lawv tsis ub cov me nyuam thiab koj from los tsis npam koj muab txoj sia rau lawv tsis tau txhais tau tias koj from yuav npam koj thiaj ntshai from tsam rov npam koj loj tshaj Tam sim no tsam koj tau tsuab quav noj los tsis tuag li

Yog koj tsis hlub lawv niam ua cas ho tsis muab nws tso mus kom nws tau tus hlub nws ma. Koj muab nws qha qhuav thiaj ua rau cov me nyuam tu siab. Koj yeej siab phem thiab, yog yus tsis yuav ces muab tso mus

Zoo heev li os

Yawm txiv aws, koj dim plaws ces koj cov me nyuam txawb tsaws xwb os mog, ntuj yeej fhaib haum2 os mog

This is sad from either side's point of view. Idk why peb hmong keep forcing marriages.

Tim koj xwb os thaub laus aw, yog koj tsis nyiam nws thaum xub koj kuj ntim kom dim los po, koj yeej tau tsim nws tiag lawm ne

If you dislike the mother so much then don’t expect “her” kids to love you. I bet you didn’t love her so you didn’t love the kids too..

Somethings off about this story. It's unfortunate that you and your first wife had to go through something like this. It's not fair for both of you but I can say this much. Kids, their not just going to act out of hand because you don't love their mom. You had to do something bad for them to hate you this much and not want to have anything to do with you. There's two side to the story!

Tsis txob tu siab thiab mog

This guy he only think about himself no one else he really doesn’t care about the died wife or the children’s feeling he been made the children mother suffered her whole marriage life with him! That’s not her fault that he stuck with her. Hmong men’s all they thought about only themselves!

Ua neeg nyob tsis nyiam, tuag los tsis yuav ciaj los tsis yuav li hos…yuav lawm zoo li cas los yuav tau hlub thiaj yog txiv neej yawg tseem tiag. Tsis nyiam tsis hlub ua cas ib sij ib tug menyuam. Dag li dag lim hiam xwb. Cas ntuj tsis cia koj yog tus tuag.

You should also understand from her point too. She also wants someone who loves her too, only her. Yes, it's not your fault or your wife's fault. I blame the old way. I bet it was hard on both of you guys, especially, the kids too.

Yog kuv yeej ntxhub cov niag ntsej muag laus pheej muab menyuam yuam sib txi kawg nkaus li os!! Yeej tim koj thiab vim koj tsis hlub lawv niam hos cov menyuam no los yeej phem dhau! Cov yog koj yuag tawm plaws twb tsim nyog lawv hlub koj os! Koj lub neej lwj siab thiab liam tag vim cov laus xwb!!

Ua lub neej nyuaj sab kawg le

Kj hais tsis yog lawm txawj yog niam Tij txis kwv kj yuav tsum hlub nws thiab hos kj yeej ua tsis yog lawm thiab cov menyuam tsis hlub Kj los txhob Tu siab os txiv ntxawm

Cas tus txiv neej no rhuav plhu tshja

Kuv yog koj cov me nyuam los kuv yeej coj li no thiab os, koj yeej tsis hlub lawv niam na

I feel so sorry for this man. The women also suffer but women learn to love a man. Men will never have a change of heart

His wife has no right to curse him. I would think she's more understanding since the beginning he didn't want her but was forced into the marriage.

Tus me txiv ntxawm, txhob tu siab rau koj cov menyuam tu siab rau koj niam thiab txiv tus muab koj yuam yuav tus niam tij, koj tsis hlub ces txhob pe txhob yuav nws los tsim xwb. Koj muab cov me nyuam niam tsim dhau lawm lawv twb tu siab tag rau koj lawm, lawv thiaj tsis hlub koj. Txhob tu siab tau tus koj hlub lawm nyob tsawg hnub xam txhawj hnub xwb.

Yawm txiv aw yog kv yog kj cov me nyuam los kv yeej coj li kj cov me nyuam tiab os

Txiv neej txhua tus yeej xav kom tau txhua tus pojniam zoo nkauj yog nwg li. Peb ua menyuam, peb yuav tau ua lub siab zam txim rau tej niam thiab txiv xwb os mos

Ua cas tseem yuav poj ntsuam thiab xwb, koj yeej Tsi hlub koj yeej tsim koj poj niam ib sim neej na thaub…koj cov me nyuam yeej Tsi tau txais kev hlub ntawm koj ib yam thiab, lawv niam twb hluas tshaj niam pog laug koj twb Tsi hlub ne tos lawv tu siab naj

I pity the beginning of the story when the father was forced in the marriage. The sister-in-law didn’t have a choice either. However, it was the father’s parents who made the decision for him to marry the sister-in-law. He shouldn’t blame his wife for his unhappy marriage and miserable sufferings. His parents are the ones he should be mad at and have grudges against, not his wife. I get why his kids feel disdain towards the new wife and their loveless actions to their dad. I hope things change for this family.

I remember this story. It is probably one of the older stories that got deleted?

Yog tsis txaus siab kuj txhob yuav. tsis pub yuav twb tsis hlub yog pub yuav hajyam tsis hlub.

Xav tia cov menyuam yuav tau txoj nyuaj siab lawm to ntej

Kuv yuav niam tij thiab tab sis wb sib hlub heev os

Koj cov me nyuam hais tias lawv tsis tau txais koj txoj kev hlub li no es koj puas tau hlub lawv ma? Yog koj tsis tau hlub ces lawv hais yog lawm. Yog kojhlub ces lawv hais tsis yog lawm.

yog kj mj ib tug lm ce txhob to lawv kev hlub lm nawb mog kv yog kv txiv mj ib tug lo kv yeej tsi hlub thiab vim tia peb hlub kj tab kj muab hlub nw.xb

Thaub koj txhob tu siab koj twb Tsi ua tau ib tug zoo txiv rau koj tus poj niam thiab koj cov me nyuam yeej Tsi npam leej twg li os, mloog koj hais mas koj yog ib tug txiv neej siab phem tshaj plaws

No matter how bad this guy is, he hold the position of a father..raised the kids, his kids must take care of him.

Koj xav tias koj thiaj li tu siab xwb los thaub laus koj tus poj niam haj yam tu siab naw

Txhob khoo koj cov me nyuam hlub koj os. Yus ua phem lawm ces yus kawg tuag tsis muaj kev hlub es tsis Txhob cem2 koj cov me nyuam thiab foom lawv. Koj twb tsis lees koj txoj kev txhaum thiab me

We all just heard from one side of the story so stop judging. We’re American kids believe in love and prove not only because he’s a father and he got the right to make his own decisions just like most of the OG normally do. Our Mom is our god most father just there. This guy not telling everything but his side of the story.

Yawm txiv aw yus muaj poj niam los tseem niaj nub mus tham hluas nkauj ces kawg zoo li kov tiag

For your daughters to not care about you then that says alot. You really did something for all your kids to hate you. You can give a child shelter and food but that doesn't mean you love them. Kids are not stupid. If all of your kids hate you then they probably grew up without a loving father. You sound like those Hmong man who goes and cheat on his wife, never come home, help his wife, nor the care of the kids. Don't act surprised and sad why your kids doesn't love you. You older generation expect your kids to love and care of you no matter how bad you treated them just because you're their "father". Thank goodness we grew up in the 21st century.

Very sad for both sides

kj yeej txuam thiab Yuav tsis yuav los twb yuav lawm tseem lub siab tsis hlub los kuj lam hlub kom luag txob tu2 siab thiab twb tsis yog kj thiaj txawj tu siab xwb nws los yeej tu siab ib yam kj thiab na. Ho ib qhov ces ib txia me nyuam nyob tim mis kas ko yeej g tshua paub xav es yeej g hlub niam hlub txiv os li ko os

Qhov zoo ces cia niam tij ua niam tij es cia kwv ua kwv es nyias nyob nyias txhob los sib yuav ces yeej zoo dua os

Very tragic story for everyone, husband, wife, kids and the younger brother (story owner). My heart hurts for all.

I need to hear the kids side of the story!!! There’s got to be more to this for the kids to act out of hand towards him. I wouldn’t be surprise that he didn’t include the part where he said, “you’re not my kids from this point on.”

They are both wrong in certain ways but the whole fault was the OG and grandpa that made him married his sister-in-law. It is not right for the kids to Wrong him this much too. After all he is their father they may not be at all fault but if they do him totally wrong in this way they will get karma coming because he is father. You wasted your time taking them in, you should have letting her go with the kids and let another guy tortured them than maybe they’ll understand your pain. Blame it on your father not on you. Ntuj will do justice and punish those that deserves to be punished. 🙏🙏

Tom ntej no yog leej twg tseem muab Niam Tij thiab kwv yuam sib txis ces cia muab txis kiag rau nws ntag yog nws ntshaw dhau lawm. Hmoob laus cov cai tsiaj no yog cai rhuav neeg nkaus xwb.

He's playing victim his whole life and only thinks of himself. I don't agree with the arranged marriage but his wife/sister in law had no choice either. She was in the same boat but he selfishly justified only his anger and resentment his entire life. Also, just having children does not make you a parent. Can't stand the old school thinking that you're obligated to your parent just bc they gave you life. That's only part of it; you still have to be a parent, raise your children and be there for them emotionally and physically. That's why his kids resent him so much.

Tos koj cov me nyuam tsis k koj los koj yeej muab phem zog lawm txog qhov koj poj niam twb pw tim tsev kho mob los koj twb tsis paub no mas yeej tsim nyog tu siab rau koj lawm