Week 4: How to Process Grief for You and a Friend
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In Week 4 of our Forgiving What You Can’t Forget Online Bible Study, Kendra Schwarz sat down with author Lysa TerKeurst. Lysa talks about how we can handle and process our own grief and how to walk with a friend through their difficult circumstances. During this time, we will discuss how setting boundaries is important during the phases of grief, and how ultimately they help you on your way to forgiveness and emotional healing.
Related Resources:
Grab your copy of the Forgiving What You Can’t Forget: www.p31bookstore.com/products/forgiving
Therapy and Theology: Setting Healthy Boundaries
kzfaq.info/get/bejne/d56nabOAqZzSYHk.html
Therapy & Theology: The Daily Cure for a Heavy Heart
kzfaq.info/get/bejne/odmJgqaet7WWm4k.html
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@tlcc1690 3 жыл бұрын
Thank u. This is all helping me so much. Praise God for your ministry!
@carolletourneau9564 2 жыл бұрын
Oh yes, thank you ! Shalom to you both !!!
@carolletourneau9564 2 жыл бұрын
We need to protect ourselves.
@sharonspalding5014 3 жыл бұрын
Lysa you just described my life and the reason I was brought to this study. I have been helped a lot so far but looking to Jesus fo greater help this week
@HudsonClassof 3 жыл бұрын
Prayers to everyone this week and we continue to build strength in forgiveness. Each week I am lifted up by Lysa’s words. Thank you for this bible study and bring hope to those of us going through pain and uncertainty. It can be difficult to keep going inward. So very exhausting at times but necessary.
@rebeccahayhurst442 3 жыл бұрын
Such a great reminder about the fact that we can’t change others but only bring influence and be the person we need to be. Very validating for me to hear about the importance of grieving our losses, no matter what they are abs having boundaries in the process of forgiveness.
@gdeannecampbell1067 3 жыл бұрын
I most sincerely appreciate how you, Lysa, explained boundaries. Boundaries are immediately seen as bad, as negative and as something pushing someone else away by my family, whereas, I have learned through you, through prayer and through going to therapy, they’re so incredibly helpful. Their like an outline. You know how close you can be, you also know that your emotions and psychological self are protected. By implementing boundaries, I definitely am saying that here is the line and that’s it however it allows me to truly know how to love someone without getting so close to them and being victimized again by them. For myself, with everything that I personally have experienced with being mentally, emotionally, and psychologically abused by a very close family member, I learned that I can forgive their past behavior and love them at a distance and with conditions. For my heart and mind, I feel good and solid about that. My husband stands with me on this as well. The person in question knows that there is a very distinct boundary with them too. Everything is transparent and honest.
@stephaniehaines4454 3 жыл бұрын
Very Good . Lost my sister 6yrs and honestly It took me 5yrs to be ok with it. I got very stuck in the different processes. We had a hard childhood and we're very close . When we grew up we did everything together. Family vacations etc... I love how you spoke about dreaming in the past vs future . I didn't know how to dream in the future without her. I'm doing well now. God is very very close to the broken-hearted just like his word says & He will never leave you. God is good , I'm happy for my sister now snd I dream now of my future with her again someday With God with us . Lol I think about God putting his arms around us and giving us bear hugs all together ❤️❤️❤️ Saying Girls Y'all did Good ,Daddy love You !!!
@cathykieta7704 3 жыл бұрын
Love this! So much in such a short little video! Grieving is dreaming in reverse. Powerful!
@Blessedmama7 3 жыл бұрын
Boundaries “you can forgive them 70 times seven without getting destroyed in the process.” 11:34 Anointed word!
@michelebittel9924 3 жыл бұрын
So much in this short video! Thank you, Proverbs 31 Ministries!
@peggycuomo1877 3 жыл бұрын
Working harder on someone else, when they aren't willing to work on themselves, YES!!!
@katiedrew4708 3 жыл бұрын
Peggy Cuomo Especially when they are "BULL-HEADED!
@irisdeniselopez7685 3 жыл бұрын
Lysa, THANK YOU SO MUCH, I NEEDED THIS NOW. Your message was God sent and perfect for me NOW. You have confirmed and reassured my thoughts in my current relationship. The time to grieve is near for me, again. However, this time it will be done right by doing what is necessary to maintain my overall sanity without hurting or being hurt EVER AGAIN. Bless you all, in Jesus Name. Amen...🙏🏻😌
@tlcc1690 3 жыл бұрын
Please pray. I have realized I have unforgiveness and deep pain for my daughters father. And all he has out us through
@Aurora-duley17 3 жыл бұрын
I love the set & decor. Not to take away from the lesson but where did you get those chairs? The flowers are perfect & the gold tones with the cow hide are great together. I also loved your shoes and Lisa’s blouse!
@christinamorales6887 3 жыл бұрын
I had to let go of my son who is an addict and I turned him over to God and worked with a therapist for me and heal my part. We can’t heal other people only God can and it has to come from them. We have to let go and let God and get out of the way and let God work.
@kaywellons4059 3 жыл бұрын
Please pray for my two sisters who do not speak to me because of settling my mother's estate after she died. I know the Lord can reconcile this in His time.
@nancywest6593 3 жыл бұрын
Kay praying right now
@melissathompson4884 3 жыл бұрын
Trying to work on the boundaries. I need to learn to grieve and move forward. I woke up today incredibly sad
@aprilbourne967 3 жыл бұрын
I did last night
@marilynverbeek8727 3 жыл бұрын
hugs!
@Proverbsbless 3 жыл бұрын
Please pray for my daughter Alisa Evette that God would protect her from hurt harm and danger
@aprilbourne967 3 жыл бұрын
Prayers 🙏🏻
@Webbgurl2000 3 жыл бұрын
Maybe a better prayer would be for her to grow in discernment. Our children aren’t meant to live in a pain free world . It’s not realistic. But, we can teach them how to hear from God and make the best decisions they can and be there for them
@aprilbourne967 3 жыл бұрын
I've learned that I've had to distance myself from my brother and his friend and my Aunt for now because they say very hurtful words to me trying to offer help when it ends up being insults hurreled at me. I've tried to move on and forgive but, I can't simply put forget the hurtful and harmful words . I've also distanced myself from my dad's family a lot too because some are unbelievers too. They don't seem to want to be around me much except one of my youngest cousins on my dad's side guilt trips me and my niece does too but then she asks really personal questions about why I don't have a baby . So does my nephew
@marygrady1548 3 жыл бұрын
Lol im gonna have to have a lot of funerals
@colleenq7 Жыл бұрын
You say that boundaries are meant to hold ourselves together. I’m just wondering what Biblical grounding this has? Is it possible that boundaries aren’t for ourselves but perhaps boundaries are actually a way for us to love others better? This is what I’ve learned from the Godly people in my life anyways. By not allowing people to sin against us in certain ways, it’s not for ourselves, but for them. I think it’s a very case by case, situation by situation thing though and that it’s dangerous when we frame boundaries as to protect ourselves. God is our protector and we are called to take everything to Him in prayer. I think we live in such a self-focused world that the last thing we need to do is frame boundaries in this way (that’s what the world does). I think it’s all about our heart motives in each situation. I think that’s what God cares most about- our heart motives and that we must constantly check in with Him to examine our heart for wrong motives since He knows our hearts better than us (Jeremiah 17:9 “The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it?”). These are my thoughts anyways and I intend on praying more about this for myself. I mean all of this in love and genuine care. Much love to you, Lysa! I’ve appreciated your books for years. 💗
@saintejeannedarc9460 Жыл бұрын
Interesting question. The concept of boundaries isn't found directly in the bible. I did a search, and did find one write up that talked of boundaries going both ways, which they do need to too. We need to be conscious of invading others boundaries as well, and they put that under Godly self control. The scripture that comes to my mind a beautiful commandment, where God baked it in to love ourselves: Love your neighbour as you love yourself. I've heard it argued that it only means love your neighbour, and that we default do love ourselves, and further, that our carnal tendency is to love ourselves too much and selfishly. That is not always true. So boundaries being a two way street could definitely come under that scripture. Usually if a person has poor or no boundaries, they are wide open and ripe for abuse. I went through a boundary discovery when younger. I could intellectually know what they were, but they hadn't been taught or modelled for me, so I couldn't fathom them. It took awhile, lots of counseling. Finally when the concept became real and I could discern them, I sensed them in all kinds of mild ways. Ways that I didn't know I invaded others, ways that people were stepping into mine. I could quickly spot people w/ poor boundaries and people who had very strong healthy ones, and those to the extreme that were too walled up. Further, it's still crucial to keep our boundaries strong and healthy. That's still weak link w/ me, and if I meet boundary breachers, I can fall into being invaded by them. Recently came out of a horrendly painful ending to a 10 year relationship w/ cheating. I look back and wonder where it started. He didn't allow personal boundaries and it started almost right away, where he'd wear them away and eventually knock them all down. We had a last year of supposedly trying to work it out. I realized boundaries had been eroded and I set them, but he was just playing wackamole w/ them. I think they are very important, and beware of getting involved in whatever close relationship w/ someone w/ a double standard who will erect them w/ you, but not allow you to have them.
@EA-og2pb 3 жыл бұрын
A child.