WHAT I WISH I WOULD'VE KNOWN BEFORE HAVING A BABY | ADVICE FOR NEW & EXPECTING MOMS

Рет қаралды 34,459

6 жыл бұрын

Hey guys! I really wanted to share with you the advice I wish I had known before becoming a mom. I hope this helps you in some way!
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Пікірлер: 84

@mackenzieasmr9694 4 жыл бұрын

I wish that when people gave advice they would come at it like “hey this may not apply to you but if it does this is what really helped me!” This would be helpful and it’s much easier to listen to.

@meaganmarshall8316 6 жыл бұрын

I had my baby on Monday so I really needed this. Especially the part about emotions and letting things go. I'm only a couple years older than you but I think of you as one of my mommy role models. ❤️

@Raememe 5 жыл бұрын

Delilah, thank you so much for the honesty and oppenness! I'm a control freak and a perfectionist, but learning to trust God has been so rewarding! ❤️ Our doctor told us that I am already 4 cm dilated and 75% effaced even though our son isn't due for another 4 weeks! Playing this "waiting game" will be so much more enjoyable if we just step back, let go, and say "Hey. God's got this, and there's no safer place for us to be than in His hands." 🤗

@geovannag.juareza.8197 4 жыл бұрын

“He made you the mother of your children for a reason” that touched me

@katievosloo 6 жыл бұрын

Not looking forward to the opinionated moms and mom shaming :( i am such a people pleaser, its going to be so hard to be “okay” with their judgements and just shrug it off. 23 weeks now. Wish we could just spread the love more! Well I for one will be the change! ❤️

@LoeppkysLife 6 жыл бұрын

I’m the same way! It takes time to be okay with it. Actually I’m still not okay with it haha. It’s so sad how cruel some moms can be 😕

@lauren8627 6 жыл бұрын

I'm the same! I'm 34 weeks and just basically don't talk about anything to do with birth or parenting with anyone who I think might be very pushy - especially family and friends. To be honest I guess it's just a reflection of the other person and not you!

@milenamajic 6 жыл бұрын

Do the best you can and dont worry about others. It is sad that spme moms can be so cruel. Instead of being say Supportive since they are women and should understand what you ate going through they choose to be cruel and think they know everything. You can have 10 kids and still not know everything about children and raising them. So do best u can and know. You will be just fine.

@TaylorRaine 6 жыл бұрын

Congratulations!

@EamonWill 4 жыл бұрын

Just nod and say ok and then do what you want anyway, lol. It's none of their business as long as you're not hurting your child.

@nauticalsummers 6 жыл бұрын

Thanks for the advice. Your tone and delivery are really nice. You're very down to earth and honest. 5 days until the due date!

@melissachue9471 6 жыл бұрын

YES 👏 YES 👏 A MILLION TIMES YES 👏 the perfect summation of motherhood. The loneliness, for me, has been the hardest part and the biggest shock - piled on with the hormones, it's the perfect storm. Your videos have honestly been a saving grace for me. I love getting a peak inside your little family. Your honesty and straightforward talks have been freeing for me.

@jex-seg8301 6 жыл бұрын

Girl we need a hair video! This style is SO cute on you! Also thank you for filming this video! My baby fever is SO real and this insight was so great to hear! I'm sorry that you have dealt with so many opinionated mama's.... but at the end of the day, you love Eloise and that's all that matters!

@BethanyFontaine 6 жыл бұрын

Seriously love this video Delilah! It so silly the amount of opinions you get especially being on KZfaq. I totally relate. You do you Mama! You're doing an amazing job! As Mama's we're all just flying by the seat of our pants. 😉

@Heather73090 6 жыл бұрын

Also your last point was really comforting to me. Today was such a rough cranky day for me and hearing the reminder that God gave me her specifically was a really great reminder and beautiful :)

@purplecowmovement7677 4 жыл бұрын

I became a mom a month ago and I was shocked too to say the least. I am so overwhelmed and dealing with post-partum depression. Its something I wasnt prepared for

@sherylg.9743 6 жыл бұрын

You're so calming. I'm a relatively new subby and am 36 weeks pregnant. Your videos have been very helpful. Thank you!

@oliverandamms738 4 жыл бұрын

Love how genuine you are. I hate those fake vloggers that just try to sell themselves and products

@xeniaalonso6893 6 жыл бұрын

Great video! I'm 31 weeks now with my first baby and I'm really excited but also a little bit anxious about becoming a mom. So this kind of videos really help :)

@Coolbabymama 6 жыл бұрын

I can completely relate to all of this. Especially with having a grumpy baby. My son has a strong temperament. It really got to me in the beginning. I felt so isolated and like everything I was doing was wrong and people definitely kept sharing their opinions about how “vocal” my baby is, about how “unhappy” he seemed and more. It’s like none of them understood what reflux or colic was and even though I was on a super strict elimination diet he still had many fits. The whole thing made me so emotional too. I love your perspective, because I too feel the same way about my son. I was given him for a reason and I wouldn’t change a thing about him. He’s the greatest gift 💕

@thesesweetpages 4 жыл бұрын

This is such a mature and honest video. I have three children and I'm pregnant with our forth, my husband is away with the military so I found it isolating and discovered the insta mum community. It's amazing and so supportive, but I experience the mum shaming and opinions (and unsolicited advice) pretty constantly too, in a smaller scale to you but I'm so glad you have said it x

@ingaberrenrath3233 6 жыл бұрын

Dear Delilah, I wanted to thank you for your honest vlogs! Especially the sleep training topic. We are sleep training our 3 month old right now and it is soooooo damn hard to hear my baby cry and complain, but we were in a similar situation like you at the time, only a bit worse... My daughter was only accepting me as her "cussion", my husband couldn't help me at all. Last week I definitly was at my witts end and now we know that thos was the best decision for us, too. And here in Germany it's also a very controversial topic and that we wouldn't have much support on this in the "mom-community" here. Our sleep training is going well, though we have a long way to go! But it was the best decision! And we decided to sleep train because of your experience, which you documented! So thank you!

@mariefrancis4118 5 жыл бұрын

The reason why it is controversial is because of development. As a person who studied child development it has been researched that letting an infant (not to mix up with a toddler or young child) cries for long lengths and scream cries it is stressful and can have effects on the baby's brain as stress effects the nerons. I dont think there is an issue letting a child cry for 5 or 10 minutes but screaming for an hour has then left them very stressed. I think people often dont mean harm by providing another opinion when they may have facts. Being a parent is stressful and everyone tries their best and lives their child. Just because a person offers another option or information is not shaming. Now if they say it in a mean way and insult a person then that is different. The issue with sleep training is they stop crying because they no longer think your will come to calm them. They are crying because they have separation anxiety. Or woke up and felt scared. Not everyone is aware of the research. I didn't know either before my studies and I had thought that cry it out was a great idea. We should be open to learning also and not take things personal all the time.

@petra7338 3 жыл бұрын

Delilah this was a beautiful and honest video, you really showed yourself in a very vulnerable and emotional way. Thank you so much! I have followed you since just before Theos birth, but not seen the older videos until now, so it was nice to see the younger you and all the changes you have gone through since then.

@amandacannan6835 6 жыл бұрын

Thank you so much for making this video, you are so right about mom shaming... I over analyze photos I want to post on social media because I’m afraid of people mom shaming me. I’m also like you in that it is hard for me to make new mom friends since I’m an introvert but the few that I have help so much. I have an almost 4 month old and love your videos, they have helped me tremendously thank you ❤️

@emilyevans6569 5 жыл бұрын

Thank you, this was so the video I needed to watch today! The point about learning to relax and let your baby be who they are.....yup I’m definitely struggling to learn that one at the moment! But it’s nice to know I’m not the only one who feels that way! Awesome video 👍🏼

@arezokj4669 6 жыл бұрын

I think you are the best mom that I've seen! I learn so much from you because your video's are so so REAL

@ashleycrosby3978 6 жыл бұрын

Thank you so much for this! I'm due Oct 17th and I'm scared to death but you make some great points and I love being able to watch your family every week.

@lr-xm4xn 5 жыл бұрын

Love this video. I just had my baby girl 5 days ago and can already see how true all of this is. (I'm a control freak also) Motherhood is no joke and I thought I was somewhat "prepared" but it is a whole new ballgame. Makes me happy to see moms like you getting real about the struggle, definitely is comforting as a new first time mom to know that what I am experiencing is both normal and okay. So thank you ❤️

@Heather73090 6 жыл бұрын

Great video! The trust your mom gut thing is so crucial! It was hard for me to ignore the other people’s voices when it wasn’t the best thing for my daughter. And phew those Mom shamers are the worst :-( thank you for sharing your point of view!

@len2luv427 6 жыл бұрын

The mom shaming is real! When my son was 4 days old my husbands step mom came over and told my husband and I not to hold him too much, because then he will be clingy. At 4 days old! I was so aggravated and tired that I told her “no” in the middle of her rant. Can’t believe I did it, but I’m thankful I did.

@mariefrancis4118 5 жыл бұрын

Your absolutely right...as you cant spoil a new born. They should be held. They need to bond with their parents.

@neturiunereikia 6 жыл бұрын

This is an amazing video to see , after raising a daughter who just turned one too.. I wish I had known these things before she was born but I guess everything happens for a reason. I will recommend this video to everyone, I love how well you’ve explained every single detail and it’s such true! thank you! 🙏

@kjc_cal2112 5 жыл бұрын

Thank you for this video! I really needed to hear this. I’m a first time mom of a 6 week year old boy. I’m also a stay at home mom and could totally relate to what you said

@chavelybourgeois1605 6 жыл бұрын

I love that headband on you!😍 This is so relatable! I think every mother is opinionated.😉 Or has mom shamed other moms in some way. I remember a mom friend telling me she was letting her baby cry it out for 2 ours because her husband didn't want her to spoil her baby. I was shocked and respectfully spoke my mind. And there were lots of times that I've been mom shamed myself. And every time I was I researched the topic. Most of the time my mom gut was right, other times I needed to make some adjustments.😉 And the first baby is kinda a mothers guinea-pig.🙊 You have so much to learn about your child and who you are as a new mother. And with all the hormones making you crazy!🤣 It's hard. Even though every kid is different, you'll notice with the second one everything will go smoother and you'll worry less about sleeping schedules, or if your baby isn't reaching surtain milestones.☺ You're a great mother Delilah! This video will help a lot of young moms out there!❤

@benedettascarpari1466 5 жыл бұрын

Just wanted to say something for you Delilah...my sister was born at 23 weeks and she was always the small one and you could imagine how worried my mum was. She started waking at almost 24 months old...and now she is a perfect beautiful 21st years old. We are all different and that’s the beauty of life 💞

@chloella4720 6 жыл бұрын

I sleep trained my daughter too and got a fair bit of slack for it from family members at the time but now they are all are amazed at the way she puts herself to sleep in any situation. I was also mum shamed over the weekend 🙄 for carrying my nearly 6 month old in my baby carrier facing outwards. She openly and loudly addressed that “babies shouldn’t be carried like that, put the poor thing in a pram” 🙄

@LoeppkysLife 6 жыл бұрын

Oh my goodness. Why do people feel the need to say things like that?

@nw4090 6 жыл бұрын

Awesome video. I took the plunge and Sleep trained my baby girl after watching you go through the process. Best thing i did for her. Currently napping peacefully as i type this 💗 thank you!

@candycandyissodandy 6 жыл бұрын

N. W. Same!!

@ladykatietx 11 ай бұрын

These colors are so pretty on you!! I discovered your channel just in the last year so I'm obviously a little late watching this, lol.

@becca.carroll 3 жыл бұрын

Thanks Delilah!! So great to hear.

@user-jm5or1dm7s 5 жыл бұрын

Thank you so much for sharing this! I feel exactly the same and your words really help me to overcome this tough time with a newborn 💚

@laurencefelx-chasse4240 6 жыл бұрын

Amazing video as always! It is not always easy to be a mom, but it is the greatest experience 💕 Hello from Quebec xx

@demonangel9262 6 жыл бұрын

A very thoughtful and truthful video. Good points!! Thank you!!

@gracecarter2062 6 жыл бұрын

Love your sit down videos. 💛

@milenamajic 6 жыл бұрын

Great video. And advice for new moms. I dont understand some moms who are crueal towards other moms. Its like bullying.

@Reidsgirl09 6 жыл бұрын

My baby is 8 weeks old & this video helped me so much! Thank you! You’re doing great!

@chloepallas5733 6 жыл бұрын

So helpful, thank you Delilah ☺️ a little less scared of becoming a mum soon 🙈💗

@johannawhyle9 6 жыл бұрын

Ahhhhh I agree to it all. Your channel is so refreshing! Xx

@leticiafernandes8804 5 жыл бұрын

Thanks for this video, Delilah!❤

@jcpurcell5096 6 жыл бұрын

I love this video! It's very true. My advice is smile and wave! 😁

@1991tamtam 6 жыл бұрын

I also have no mom friends, I don’t know many people where I live. I wish I still lived in sask. I’d be your mom friend.

@Preciousanagonzalez1 5 жыл бұрын

Thank you for that advice, you are very nice for taking the time to give us your advice and tips

@carolinalattaruolo3152 5 жыл бұрын

I got you. Expecially the point of the loneliness. Is so important to make mommy friends.

@faaroslee 6 жыл бұрын

i love you and Eloise so much! looking forward to new vlogs from you as i love watching Eloise, she is a pretty baby girl. i have one boy at 7 months old now, and everytime i watch your vlogs with Eloise noises, my boy will stop and drop whatever he is doing and listen to his "e-friend". but this morning when i was catching up with one of your vlog, my son cried as he thought i have another baby 🤣 keep it up mommy, we love you! loves from Malaysia 😙

@janiceatkings 6 жыл бұрын

Caden bum scooted and did not walk till 15 months. Eloise will probably not ever crawl but one day get up walk. Don't worry about her not walking yet. She will! :)

@Teacupgirly 6 жыл бұрын

Janice, I never crawled either. I went from rolling around to walking. Every baby is different :) although I do blame my not-crawling to my clumsiness when it comes to sports lol

@mariefrancis4118 5 жыл бұрын

I think your a great mom and brave to be sharing everything on on KZfaq. While I dont agree with sleep training and I offer factually and researched reason why. It isn't to mom shame but to just provide information for others. Because some people are not always aware.

@carmentehillah 4 жыл бұрын

Love your hair in this video, Delilah! ❤️ Yes, moms (and older ladies) can be terribly opinionated! And full of loads of advice. BUT the best thing about advice is that we don't have to take it😉 That being said, your advice in this video is pretty good👌 loads of wisdom! Thanx Delilah dear...

@iambaked1537 5 жыл бұрын

This video blessed me today. Thank you

@meresincere5682 6 жыл бұрын

Mom shaming is real. So sad that so many mother's think that what they do with their child is what u need to do with your child. If you're the mom then u know best

@banorakhalil8328 6 жыл бұрын

You are just a pretty person .. I am 6 month pregnant and am terrifying of the hole this..you make it easy to me ❤

@janiceatkings 6 жыл бұрын

Delilah, you and Zach are great parents! I can relate in mom shaming. The big one in my life is the fact that we only have one child. People try and make me feel guilty about that and there are reasons why we have one child,. Someone who should have been an encouragement and a leader told me one that it is wrong to only have one child.

@LoeppkysLife 6 жыл бұрын

Oh my that’s awful 😕

@TlynnMarie 6 жыл бұрын

Couldn't of said it better myself thank you for this video 😊😊😊

@thehomesteadingmama 6 жыл бұрын

The mom shaming!! Ugh!! Been dealing with that since I was prego to be honest. Not sure how that's possible but apparently it is😂

@LoeppkysLife 6 жыл бұрын

Aww I’m sorry to hear that 😔

@karalaybourne1560 5 жыл бұрын

I wish I saw this video earlier. You hit everything I dealt with.

@sharhondarivera6378 4 жыл бұрын

I’m super stubborn. All those mom’s have felt my wrath. 🤣🤣

@StrangeLittleLady 6 жыл бұрын

I agree with almost everything you said, one thing on opinions tho: its totally okay to have your own opinion as long as you thoroughly educate yourself! It annoys me so much when people have strong opinions on something but they actually have no idea what they are talking about. When you have informed yourself, know all the pros and cons and possible consequences and then still think that its the best option for your child, then and only then you should ignore other peoples opinions.

@twistedpaula 6 жыл бұрын

I'm 5 months pregnant and I already know my baby will train me when it comes to patience, God def knows what we need in life LOL :D

@twistedpaula 6 жыл бұрын

OMG I just realized after months of watching your videos - is that Lucy Rose at the end? I love her voice and all the songs

@carolineselig8478 5 жыл бұрын

I am a mom myself. Opinionated like the rest of us. I try not to push my opinion upon another one but if I see something that is dangerous to the child I will absolutely say something. And I hope that when someone else sees me endangering my child (even if it’s only from their perspective) that they open their mouths and tell me. Maybe just so we can talk it out. It’s a fine line between mom shaming and actual worrying.

@alishapotts6423 5 жыл бұрын

Question: what if you don't have many people that you trust to watch your children? Or what about negative influences from other children? This gets sooo real when they hit about 2 years. Things your kiddo would never do will be done if they see their friends doing it.

@zairahmaldonado 5 жыл бұрын

I know this comment is waaay late but I'm the type of person that does a lot of research on anything and everything I can think of or have a question about, so when anyone tries to tell me how to do anything I can simply educate them on why that is not true or the only way to do something. Dont be afraid to defend yourself using research. I had one of my crazy aunts try to tell me not to squat during pregnancy but I told her I not only squat but do full on weight training! I did cut weight just to be safe but any dr. will tell you to keep exercising and you know your body, just listen to it.

@rebekahellenburg8369 4 жыл бұрын

Mom shaming should not be a thing it really does hurt

@claudiajade624 3 жыл бұрын

I don't know why ppl find the need to force their opinions and parenting choices on others. Fair enough if someone comes to you for advice, or is struggling and you are close with them, or if you are just openly chatting with other mums about the different ways you do things. Otherwise, keep your opinions and particularly judgements to yourself.

@oliverandamms738 4 жыл бұрын

Worst mom shamers I had to deal with were the intersectional feminists that I follow as a group on Facebook. They were demanding that it was 'disgusting' to have a sex reveal with my family. All we did was bake cupcakes that had my husband's favorite color in them because it was a boy ( if it were a girl it'd be my favorite color) but they were so judgmental about it because they said it's his genitals didn't need to be told to the world, I'm disgusting to focus on my son's genitals.. I told them 'look, I'm pregnant, I am going thru a hell of a lot of bullshit from pregnancy and the one thing I know about my child is his sex, so yes, I'm sharing it with my family because they wanted to know the ONE piece of information we get to learn about the in utero baby" Its my child. It's not damaging my child. And yes, there are multiple genders but sex and gender are different.

@minapenner1732 2 жыл бұрын

👍🏻💪

@tristinkathryn5061 6 жыл бұрын

For sure not ready for opinionated moms. help is always welcome, but if/ and when it comes to the point when other moms telling me what to do with my child thats when its not okay, im in general a very awkward, push over person but when it comes to her i feel like i'll have more of a voice, not just for me but for her.. if that makes sense? ( 40 weeks and nervous as hell )

@jesicaarndt5003 6 жыл бұрын

I have recently discovered how much unsolicited advice there is coming in from everyone... "you should do this, that, etc" it drives me nuts. It's one thing when you ask but when someone just gives their advice to you when it comes to anything it's just rude.