What to do & not do for your ADHD child - ADHD Dude

What to do & not do for your ADHD child - ADHD Dude - Ryan Wexelblatt

Рет қаралды 79,200

Күн бұрын

ADHD Dude provides parent training through the ADHD Dude Membership Site, in-person school-year programs, and summer camps. ADHD Dude is not gender-specific content.
𝗔𝗗𝗛𝗗 𝗗𝘂𝗱𝗲 𝗶𝘀 𝗥𝘆𝗮𝗻 𝗪𝗲𝘅𝗲𝗹𝗯𝗹𝗮𝘁𝘁, 𝗟𝗖𝗦𝗪, 𝗔𝗗𝗛𝗗-𝗖𝗖𝗦𝗣
Ryan is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker, Certified School Social Worker, and father to a son with ADHD & learning differences. ADHD Dude is based in Tucson, Arizona.
𝗣𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝗷𝗼𝗶𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗔𝗗𝗛𝗗 𝗗𝘂𝗱𝗲 𝗰𝗼𝗺𝗺𝘂𝗻𝗶𝘁𝘆:
✅Membership Site: adhddude.com
✅Mailing List: www.subscribepage.com/adhddude
✅Trip Camp: adhdtripcamp.com
✅Meet Ryan: adhddude.com/meet-ryan
✅Speaking/Presentations: ryanwexelblatt.com
✅Instagram: @theadhddude
✅Videos For Kids: tinyurl.com/dudetalkplaylist
ADHD Dude is for educational purposes. I am not serving in a clinical capacity and cannot provide clinical consultation or free advice through KZfaq comments, email, etc.
#adhddude #ryanwexelblatt #adhdkids #adhdchildren #adhdkidstreatment #adhdsocialskills

Пікірлер: 102

@calvarylife Жыл бұрын

Bro I’m a newbie here. Learnt more in this one video/ post whatever the terminology is, than hours with, let’s just say others. Easy to understand, great advice, well delivered, great job. New subscriber.

@plainmom2 Жыл бұрын

I wish I would have known about parent behavior training and thank you for all that you do for this community

@ADHDDude Жыл бұрын

Thank you :)

@ShelleyBay 3 жыл бұрын

Fantastic video as always! Thank you!

@ADHDDude 3 жыл бұрын

Thank you!

@marcomoon6062 Жыл бұрын

I dont know how many times, as a kid, I told my mom I didn't know how to use the dishwasher and it worked lol

@ADHDDude Жыл бұрын

Exactly to my point! :)

@juliefisher4730 3 жыл бұрын

Excellent advise, thank you so much.

@ADHDDude 2 жыл бұрын

Glad it was helpful!

@jazzywhatyouputiniswhatyou2854 Жыл бұрын

I need help so bad!! I have a 15 yr old teen girl. I’ll start with the parent behavior training. I need to get educated and want the best for my daughter. This piece I just listened to was very helpful.

@ADHDDude Жыл бұрын

I'd suggest starting with my "Start Here" playlist here at the channel. Thanks

@user-nv4mk9un8l Жыл бұрын

The most helpful and useful channed about ADHD I ever have seen

@calvarylife Жыл бұрын

Me too

@simonlillyuk 2 жыл бұрын

keep up the good work Ryan

@ADHDDude 2 жыл бұрын

Thank you Simon!

@coreyneil8763 8 ай бұрын

GOOD JOB! That last one really hit home!!!

@ADHDDude 8 ай бұрын

Thanks, apppreciate it

@annak29 2 жыл бұрын

Thank you for your depth and candor. So rare these days. So much snake oil and gimmicks.

@ADHDDude 2 жыл бұрын

Thank you so much, and yes there is quite a lot of snake oil and gimmicks out there thanks to social media!

@OneFaithFilledLady Жыл бұрын

Omg! I'm realizing point #2 bc my 9yr old calls me for everything and I just started reminding him that he can do "that" himself... like get something to drink.

@ADHDDude Жыл бұрын

Keep doing what you're doing, the more he realizes he can do for himself, the more confident he'll become.

@OneFaithFilledLady Жыл бұрын

@@ADHDDude Ok.. thank you. I'm going to check out your membership

@coreyneil8763 8 ай бұрын

This is good shit.

@ADHDDude 8 ай бұрын

Thanks Corey!

@emilycarroll92 Жыл бұрын

The “don’t do things for them that they can do themselves” 😫 Like I know…. I know I shouldn’t get my 8 year old daughter a drink from the kitchen or hand her something she can’t reach at the moment or freakin dress her in the morning but I struggle with adhd as well. Like really bad… (I feel like we all think our ADHD is the worst 😂) But if I were to not get her the juice box from the fridge then I have to deal with the tantrum or arguing or whatever manipulation she’s in the mood for and sometimes I literally just can’t…. Like I can’t. I definitely going to be looking into the parent behavioral training…. I feel like Im setting her up for complete failure and I’m like the worst mom ever bc I can’t control my own emotions and sensory issues enough to make sure MY CHILD is going to grow up to be a happy and independent woman who loves her self… uggggghjjdkwnjdkfjfneifnfkskjsg

@ADHDDude Жыл бұрын

In Scaffolding Better Behavior I teach parents how to reduce parental accommodation which is what you're describing and not respond to emotional manipulation.

@domoniquemichelle17 9 ай бұрын

Same here

@MD-zy9oq 6 ай бұрын

Are you me? Seriously

@avl1000 Жыл бұрын

The part regarding overdependency is very tricky to me. I'm a father of a 4 year olds girl and I feel very divided between the acknowledgement that she lacks executive control to deal with the lack of motivation for doing boring ordinary taks like brushing her teeths and the realization that she will "freeze" in front of her tasks and will demand help, in one hand, and the goal of not making her codependent on the other. Often she is stubborn and want us to do things for her and we insist in not helping her at all in a task she is perfectly capable of doing (and do most of the days), but the result is always catastrophic. Thanks for the great content! Getting very important knowledge from your videos.

@ADHDDude Жыл бұрын

Thanks Arthur, and to put this in context - with any of my content I do suggest adjusting it by age. That being said, I don't focus on her age only because I don't have much experience with that age group.

@avl1000 Жыл бұрын

@@ADHDDude Thanks for the kind and quick reply!

@ninakoshman5571 Жыл бұрын

Your daughter is only 4, it’s ok to help her with a lot of things. I also have a daughter that age and older boys. My kids usually started doing everything themselves between 5-6 years old. I bet that she just feels loved when you help and needs your attention and that’s why she asks you to do it for her. Maybe these could be bonding moments for you and your daughter.

@ildart8738 9 ай бұрын

This describes my attitude as a kid perfectly. I could do tasks which I was really interested in without sleep or eating, but mundane tasks like cleaning the floor felt like something unfathomable. By the way at 32, I still feel the same way. Overdependency is a whole another ball game. I can write another comment on this topic, but I have to collect my wits about me.

@jennyboda8421 9 ай бұрын

We don’t remember when we’ve succeeded because we aren’t MADE aware. When things go right, we barely ever notice. When things go wrong, we notice EVERY TIME because we are made aware and now we have to fix it. So it’ll imprint more than any succession just because of how long it had space in your head.

@ADHDDude 9 ай бұрын

Excellent point, thank you for sharing, just keep in mind that everyone's experience is unique. ADHD is not a "one size fits all" so your experience is not representative of all people with ADHD and vice-versa.

@joesmith9139 Жыл бұрын

Hi, very informative video, thank you for your help. I really would like to know your thoughts on sports and adhd, more specifically on swimming. Can it help kids learn discipline, focus better? Thank you!

@ADHDDude Жыл бұрын

Nothing will help kids focus better except medication and brain maturity. What will help improve behavior is parents chaning how they do things which is why Parent Training is the evidenced-based treatment for kids with ADHD. As for swimming, I definitely recommend it for a multitude of reasons.

@lauramartinez5079 2 жыл бұрын

What do you do when they annoy and yell at everyone and make it everyone’s problem that they don’t wanna do things like getting dressed, bathing, brushing teeth?

@ADHDDude 2 жыл бұрын

It sounds like you need some support with scaffolding to improve behavior at home. This is covered in my series, Scaffolding Better Behavior & Self-Confidence, available at the ADHD Dude Membership Site.

@mreoski Жыл бұрын

@@ADHDDude : Can you please begin to include hyperlinks to specific pages that you reference in your comment responses? It would be a tremendous convenience/help to us subscribers of your Membership Site.

@danielgiraldo8050 Жыл бұрын

@@ADHDDude ⁸⁸⁸⁸⁸⁸⁸⁸⁸⁸⁸⁸⁸⁸⁸⁸⁸⁸⁸y⁷⁸⁸

@christinel3504 9 ай бұрын

I have one like this. It's very frustrating.

@oliveamyshel 6 ай бұрын

Yes I'd love to know how to get him to do simple things like dressing him. His shoes and socks not being perfect..... brushing teeth. It's literally almost impossible to have a peaceful morning. Everyone's life is struggeling because of this

@carolfederoff4272 Жыл бұрын

I feel like I'm enabling him by making my 13 year old breakfast but I'm the one that knows he needs a healthy breakfast whereas he will completely skip it if I don't...which is NOT okay by my husband or myself. Do you have suggestions on this? If I make it, he eats it. Which is worth it to me if needed, but maybe you have suggestions on how to move towards him making his own. I'm not talking cereal here. I'm talking protein. Eggs, Sausage or even yogurt and granola. He sees it as too much work even though he's capable.

@izzymom2745 9 ай бұрын

If it's an executive function delay, hiw in the world do drugs help to improve that? What prescription drugs are you referring to that are needed for ADHD?

@MsSand86 Жыл бұрын

My 10 year old son have ADHD and I'm feeling like I dont know how to help him. He don't listen and he's very defensive and think he's always right. He was suspended from school and now lives with my sister 4 hours away to attend school. I want him home with me but I don't know how to help him behave.😢

@annemarievandongen8199 Жыл бұрын

maybe therapy or medication works

@ADHDDude Жыл бұрын

The American Academy of Pediatrics recommended treatment for ADHD is Parent Training (provided through the ADHD Dude Membership SIte) in conjunction with medication management. Therapy is not a recommended treatment for kids with ADHD and no type of talk therapy has demonstrated efficacy in addressing ADHD-related challenges. Read the evidence here: www.effectivechildtherapy.org

@veronicarok1 Жыл бұрын

I have checked various of your videos, my boy was diagnose with ADD, my boy is t very flexible on social situations, he call himself socially awkward, he completely block himself on situation that are not as stimulating for him. It made social live quiet difficulty, how can I help him being more flexible on situations that he is not to happy on?

@ADHDDude Жыл бұрын

Hi, I'm not exactly sure of what you're asking.

@archanasharma3973 Жыл бұрын

How can I find parent behaviour training? I live in Canada

@ADHDDude Жыл бұрын

www.adhdudecourses.com

@Roar1921 Жыл бұрын

If I ask my son to keep the dishes inside he picks up multiple in one palm and keepa dropping them. He thinks it isn't a big deal if the spoons drop on the floor. He thinks it's efficient use of time to take everything together🙄 he will make sure he does every work so bad that it is three times more work for us cleaning up after him

@ADHDDude Жыл бұрын

If he is genuinely doing things wrong so it creates more work for you then it's time to step into your parental authority and take back control in your home. These behaviors will not serve him well as he gets older, and will create more stress for your family if this does not change now.

@Roar1921 Жыл бұрын

@@ADHDDude 👍seems like a long journey🙄

@heather2837 Жыл бұрын

What if they have a dual diagnosis of ADHD and anxiety? Would therapy be helpful for the anxiety at least?

@ADHDDude Жыл бұрын

Cognitive Behavior therapy which is the go-to treatment for anxiety has demonstrated effectiveness for older teens and adults with ADHD, not kids. I would never tell anybody not to try it, however most of the families who I've spoken with have not found CBT to be helpful. What I find produces better results is teaching parents not to accommodate anxiety. For that I recommend SPACE. I have an interview with the creator of it here, Dr Eli Leibowitz.

@kristinschlentz7519 2 жыл бұрын

Where can we cget parent behavior training?

@ADHDDude 2 жыл бұрын

www.adhddudecourses.com My Parent Behavior Training program is called Scaffolding Better Behavior & Self-Confidence. You also get access to all of my other webinar series as well.

@footballftw154 4 ай бұрын

I'm coaching kids sir ty for your feedback I appreciate you 🎉

@ADHDDude 4 ай бұрын

I appreciate what you're doing, thanks

@aubreesummerhays2616 4 ай бұрын

I am just so confused … I homeschool my daughter but she only wants to game so wondering if I should put her in public school so she does something different and be with her peers

@ADHDDude 4 ай бұрын

That's what I would strongly recommend.

@luismorales4751 Жыл бұрын

hi mr Ryan question sir are all ADHD meds for an 7 year old kid be taken after food or before food ?

@ADHDDude Жыл бұрын

I'm not a licensed medical professional and cannot give medical advice. Please speak with the prescribing physician about it.

@siouxzyable Жыл бұрын

Thoughts on OT for ADHD?

@ADHDDude Жыл бұрын

Someone doesn't need OT solely because they have ADHD. That would depend on the reason for OT.

@timmclovin5820 Жыл бұрын

How would I do this if I co parent for my daughter? Who also has apd.

@ADHDDude Жыл бұрын

Not sure what you're asking, sorry

@arank777 Жыл бұрын

How do I find a local adhd group therapy for my 9th grader boy?

@ADHDDude Жыл бұрын

I've never heard of "ADHD group therapy", regardless group therapy is not a recommended treatment for kids with ADHD. Ther American Academy of Pediatrics recommended treatment is parent training (provided through the membership site) in conjunction with medication management. www.adhddudecourses.com is the parent training membership site.

@nikkiabbott9804 2 жыл бұрын

What should parents do “in the moment” when I child is having big emotions and verbally and/or physically lashing out?

@ADHDDude 2 жыл бұрын

I couldn't answer that in a KZfaq comment, or without knowing the child's age but I cover this comprehensively in the Scaffolding Better Behavior webinar series.

@mreoski Жыл бұрын

@donnahorne2909 3 жыл бұрын

Can I join your site I'm in London thanks

@ADHDDude 3 жыл бұрын

Absolutely, there's people from all over the world who are members. You can learn more at: www.adhddudecourses.com Thank you for asking!

@donnahorne2909 3 жыл бұрын

Thank you

@chilitoprimojp3735 9 ай бұрын

is special education a good option for a student taking math his in a regular class and is an iep

@ADHDDude 9 ай бұрын

Sorry I'm not exactly sure what you're asking

@alleycat616 Ай бұрын

If you have an IEP you are already in special Ed…

@luismorales4751 Жыл бұрын

or grandson just started his so he takes half of a small pill

@meganspilman4333 Жыл бұрын

Struggling w putting my child on meds. 😢

@ADHDDude Жыл бұрын

That's understandable, have you done any of the research on the safety of ADHD medications? I would also strongly suggest you do some research on the long-term outcomes of people with ADHD who go unmedicated. The data is not good for people who unmedicated, the most concerning is it doubles their chances of developing a substance abuse problem. I follow the American Academy of Pediatrics treatment and recommendations which are medication management, in conjunction with parent training (which I provide through the ADHD Dude membership site.)

@lulamalemoen5500 Жыл бұрын

I totally relate. I realised that I was doing my kids more harm not putting them on meds. It's day one for us and I catch myself sobbing from time to time cuz I could've helped them sooner. They're homeschooled and for the first time the day is not as hectic as usual. Also in them getting diagnosed I too realised at the age of 33 that I've been living with ADHD untreated. Everything makes sense now. I'm starting my treatment soon. Mom of 2boys from south Africa❤️

@michellebeveridge8195 Жыл бұрын

I also struggled until my son was in fourth grade and I have regretted waiting ever since! He really needed that help chemically for his brain to focus better and I have seen the difference over the last 5 years! try it and you can always stop if it's not working, but dont wait.

@kylesquance824 Жыл бұрын

Night and day difference! Once you see them function on medication you'll kick yourself for not medicating earlier. I cried this first couple of weeks because I could see such a difference and how settled and engaged my child was. I was in the same camp and it's has changed my child's life, friends, family, school, coaches all notice.

@MMyers-mh4jq Жыл бұрын

How do you handle medication when there are only 1 that comes in a liquid

@ADHDDude Жыл бұрын

I'm not sure what you're asking.

@mariavansant8788 Жыл бұрын

What about parents who don’t want to medicate.

@ADHDDude Жыл бұрын

I would tell them to read the long-term research data on people with ADHD who go unmedicated.

@coolgirlfrozenfeet Жыл бұрын

Is your kid ok with their own actions? Do they like acting stupid and not understanding why? Would they rather have some way to help control obnoxious behavior? I know I did.

@mountaingal5583 Жыл бұрын

Please post these studies because I am only seeing the negatives of medication long term.

@ADHDDude Жыл бұрын

Go to the Facebook ADHD Dude page and type in "unmedicated" you'll see posts with the link to the studies.

@BobbyCulpepper.srv3fender Жыл бұрын

What is it that the medication is supposed to do? I don't want to put my child on pharmaceutical drugs nor can I afford them. Surely there must be a dietic or holistic alternative

@ADHDDude Жыл бұрын

You can watch my video that came out yesterday and I strongly recommend you do your own research on this topic. The long-term outcomes for people with ADHD who go unmedicated are not good.

@skaylingop9673 9 ай бұрын

The fact that you just said, “individual therapy isn’t recommended ADHD.” is baffling. Clinical practice guidelines recommend a combination of pharmacotherapy and cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) for treating children and adolescents with ADHD. If you had to pick one or the other, CBT has better result long-term that pharmacotherapy on its own

@jenniferturner6868 8 ай бұрын

Actually CBT is better used with adults with ADHD not children

@ADHDDude 8 ай бұрын

Actually it's not "baffling", you're just not familiar with the evidence-based clinical guidelines at all, or the American Academy of Pediatrics ADHD treatment recommendations, which are also based on evidence. Know what you're talking about before leaving a negative comment next time. Read the evidence here: www.effectivechildtherapy.org

@ADHDDude 8 ай бұрын

Thank you, the individual who left that comment is uneducated about the misinformation their sharing. You are correct - there is evidence that CBT can work well for adults and older teens as well.