I've been a solo player from the start and I don't regret it. I am in an FC but it's one where I don't have to participate in any activities and to be honest there aren't that many events anyway. Still you get help if you have a question which I like. So I found the perfect FC for myself and I try my very best to stay away from any trouble. RP isn't for me either which I feel is another source of social drama. But I do understand the wish to belong to a group and your experience is really really sad. I am glad to hear that you found your own place in the game without those "friends". Being alone does not always mean that a person is lonely. Just as being part of a group does not always mean that a person is NOT lonely. Enjoy the game in any way you like. :) I wish you all the best.

It's so difficult to find established groups of friends that are open to new members and it's even more difficult when a group you thought was a good fit for you decides you aren't a good fit for them.

It's interesting how you can feel even more lonely in an mmo than in a single player game. I'm lucky to have met good people in the game.

Finally someone gets it! I have spent 15+ years battling people who tell me to get out of their MMO because I am a solo player. I make my own world within the games world. I make own story. I don't need or want others to dictate what I do today. It is about choices.

Never would have guessed this was your first video, the production quality is really good.

I was a solo player from day one. I’m very much the kind of person who dislikes multiplayer games but I love Final Fantasy games and really wanted to experience the FF14 storyline. I really enjoy role playing along with the story as the Warrior of Light and find this experience more enjoyable than tenuous social interactions with strangers.

Its things like this that i absolutely love about this community. I found this by sheer random, and I've been playing fairly consistently for a lil over a year. I've been feeling down because I've had run ins with RPers that consistently bash on my love for this games content in both story and quality. I wont lie I've made mistakes and im learning how this community works. I've even been hurt a few times.but when i see people like you post videos like this, i cant help but be inspired! I soloed the MSQ to make sure i got the story, the lore, all of it with every level of enjoyment i could manage! Yet i still feel down sometimes when i feel alone. But this video and others like it help me see that this community has truly wonderful people in it. And that the things you think are wrong with you and the way you play, are no more than a farce and just people getting you down. Like any community, this one has its good people and bad. You just have to find your people. No matter how many or how few!

thank you for the kindness and solidarity, everyone. :) overall, i'm really glad that this was able to reach so many of you on so many different levels. or if it didn't resonate with you, that's okay. you all have your own stories and your own ways to play. regardless of social style or if you've decided to move on from the game entirely, as long as you are happier for it then that's all that really matters. i decided i'll be working on the next vid soon. see ya there!

I'm a solo player, been playing on and off since the ARR beta. Ive been in 1 FC and i honestly felt more alone in that so i left it shortly after joining. Most of my enjoyment comes from being a bard, i always stand in the same spot and try to learn music and play manually or just play midi's, and sometimes people will stop and listen for awhile, sometimes they strike up a conversation and try to talk to me, this has been the only way i really talk to anybody in the game as i have no friends.

This is so relatable, I started XIV at the start of 2020 because of lockdowns and met a group of people and joined their FC.. about a year later I realized that I felt more alone in that FC than I felt just playing solo. The group became cliquey and only the popular players who raid ever got any interactions. It kinda felt like sitting alone in the cafeteria while others had fun. I ultimately ended up abandoning that character who I sank hundreds of hours on after I left the FC because the game just didn’t feel the same.

Thank you for sharing your story. There’s never a right or wrong way to enjoy the game, or set the game aside. Glad you’re still finding your way.

Valuable lessons. I’m too much of a social gamer to enjoy it on my own, but I also cherish my small community of like-minded friends. We’re either getting too old for drama, or just shun it in general, and I hope it stays that way. Having FFXIV to always fall back on is nice.

This actually spoke to me so much. Your video inspires me in my current situation in the game. I was a part of a very active FC for years that ended up splitting off and pretty much both splits ended in a social death. I'm in a pretty much dead FC at the moment. I can't leave it because the few that are there still login occasionally and the memories of them and their friendships mean so much to me. But for the most part my character plays solo. I am now learning to become a solo player because I love and enjoy the game so much.

Started as a solo player and started an FC with friends that I made. Over the years, our FC grew, and drama in the FC eventually started to kill my experience. Uprooted from Sarg because of it, and now I'm in Halicarnassus back to enjoying the game as a solo player.

Thank you for sharing your experience and general approach to this game. I really appreciate your perspective and story :) I have learned to play the game for me. I had an old FC that would really push me through the game so we could start raiding or so they could start talking about spoilers. And that was always rough, they'd always say shit like "just watch the cutscenes in the inn later" like it was so easy. As someone who has combed through the inn journal, there are several chunks of story missing when it comes to reliving the story. And you only get to experience the story for the first time, once. So being pressured to skipping those cutscenes also pressured me into skipping that first time experience. There are huge chunks of the game I have missed out on because of that kind of pressure. I started a bun boi to remedy this, and though I do really want to raid, I'm going to take my sweet ass time with him. I have gotten into fishing in the early game, it's actually really exciting! He'll eventually become my main, but until then he's helping me relive the ARR through Shadowbringer experience I never truly got to have. At least not without being told to hurry up because apparently my sub and experience doesn't matter to people who speed read through cutscenes or outright skip them because they don't care.

I play extremely similarily, but I play with my bf during msq and daily roluettes. I tried to get more 'social' but it's often really awkward or scary. Solo is top tier

I would've never guessed this was your first video. True pro KZfaqr work. I'm in an active FC for the buffs, and I enjoy the FC chat for the random conversations people have, but I still 100% play by myself. I just prefer being a solo player. I don't have any consistent friends, but that's okay. I have my friends in real life, and I'm not looking to make any through 14. I know it is against the concept of what an MMO is, but I do play them wanting as little social interaction as possible.

This touched on so many similar things for me. Especially the "not connecting with the WoL", I'm fine with the WoL as a storytelling method, but just like you, MY characters have never been the WoL. Also, thanks for saying you have multiple characters. The only real friend I made from FF still gives me crap about having alts. I tried to explain that each character was just that, a different character, not just some skin I could change at random. Sorry, I digress. Again, you echoed so many good points. I'm glad you're enjoying the game, however you want to play it!

Feeling lonely in an mmo somehow stings more than I feel it should. Maybe it's the combination of invested time and feeling like everything is falling apart, while also feeling reluctant to find new "greener pastures".

Sometimes I crave the company of others in my faveourite game FFXIV. Sometimes I want to be alone. I really love that solo'ing the content is an option. Sometimes I want to immerse myself in the lore and sometimes I want to take down a raid boss with real team mates but what those things have in common is that I love this game more than any other.

Would love to hear more about your character lore! Thanks for taking the plunge and sharing your thoughts!

GOD this video is relatable. I've only been playing for about a year now, but it only takes a fraction of that to realized how toxic and cliquey the community can be, not even the RP community, but FCs as well. It's like going through highschool all over again. I'm glad you found a way to keep playing the game rather than cast it off entirely. There's a lot to love here, despite it's flaws, and it's worth sticking it through

Ive always played solo, with the odd pop in from real life friends/family I managed to trick into trying it. Never had the urge to join an FC or anything (wish i could autoblock invites like in WoW), I just enjoy having little to no responsibility, no raid schedules, the feeling i can walk away for a month and not be inconveniencing anyone. On the other hand i love feeling part of the community, seeing people running around, seeing sprouts, the crowds on patch day as you struggle to even see the quest giver, and even just chill chats during duties. It's the feeling that I can experience this world and all it has to offer at my own pace (just like a single player game), knowing there are thousands of people out there sharing the same or simillar experience that i could reach out to anytime i want and know i will get a warm reply.

I completely understand the pressure that an FC can put on you to rush the MSQ. Mine always wants to run stuff together, and whenever they're on with me, I always feel pressured to do dailies and be caught up on the MSQ to run stuff with them. But honestly, it completely stresses me out, and doing dailies every time I get on burns me out from the game. It's just not what interests me. So I've finally told them that I'm not interested in being caught up on the MSQ, and I've had to get comfortable being honest and telling them I'm not interested in dailies if they're running them when I'm on sometimes. Sometimes, I just want to go fishing. Thankfully, it's a very small and understanding FC, so they get it. I'm excited for the Dawntrail expansion for the graphics update and second dye channel, but honestly, I don't actually plan to run through the MSQ on it for a very long time. I'm no longer caught up on any of the recent patch quests, and I've been playing on lower-level alts for solo role-play, and don't really care to do all the latest content anymore. I've found doing that, playing slower, and taking the pressure off myself to always be caught up has greatly improved the experience for me. I can just chill and take the game at my own pace now.

As soon as you mentioned the RP community I'm like "oh boy.." It's usually the Roleplay community, a horrible FC, or both.

I treasure my solitude in FFXIV. I love raiding with real people, but sometimes I just want some peace and quiet. I love that the game allows me spaces where I can just chill out alone and think, while I do some retainer management, or farm crops, or just listen to music.

I played back when arr came out and had a ton of fun! But halfway through the story, I just felt rushed and had a hard to keep up with the story. That was mostly because of the duties/instances. Whenever I got into a dungeon, the tank would rush through the entire dungeon and watching the entire cutscenes caused most people to get mad 😅 so I just ran after them, healing where possible and bam... Quest done... I had no idea of the story or what even happened. After that, I quit due to me going to college and lack of time to play. I started playing around a month ago and love how "single player" you can be! Now you're able to play most story dungeons with a team of npcs. I can take the time to look at everything, read text of whatever you find and just take it easy! Back then, there was a big focus on progress, especially within the FCs I joined. But now I take it easy 😊 heck, I even found out I love gathering and crafting! It's so relaxing to gather everything you need to make items yourself 😊 There's all kind of players and that's absolutely fine! ❤

Been playing for 8 years. Have always been solo. I am in a great and active FC where there are no obligations. But I just lurk in it. The characters of the story are my friends. I get more fulfillment from my adventures with the Scions. I get more enjoyment out of doing things on my own time. Grouping up when I feel like it. Raiding when I want. Doing RP or attending parties when the mood strikes. I prefer it this way and it works for me.

Thank you for sharing your story! It offers a different perspective that we rarely hear from. I'm happy to hear that you're finding peace and happiness within your play style. I'm learning to enjoy playing solo since many of my friends are taking breaks, and while it can be lonely for me, your story offers me a new way of thinking of things.

I feel like seeing this video has let me come to terms finally after all these years playing the game. My experience with social death might be far from the norm, but it's largely been my struggle to fight against [and eventually accept] an increasingly growing writer's block to retire from roleplaying in general, as well as just accepting that my natural inclination in MMOs is, effectively, to be a hermit. I had it in my head that to fully enjoy an MMO you had to be socially active, join groups and the like and...it's not really the case? At least not with FF14. Despite being a 2.0 week 1 launch player it took me forever and a half to realize I'm just built to not actively seek out people, and be completely at peace with largely floating about alone in this game. Still enjoy it, immensely, but, don't always need people with me to enjoy it. ...That was a bit of an uneven rambling, but thanks for posting this video. I think I'm finally able to just say I'm happy with my current terms of engagement with this game. And don't need to force things to change.

Honestly, I really feel you... I’m playing solo since ARR. Still the part of my good old FC, but I barely touch any content with them. Mostly because of the irl schedule, cause I’m really busy with my work and everything. So I never do savages or ultimates cause I simply don’t have time for that and don’t wanna be a dead weight for my party. So I always feel a bit off and kinda lost, especially after some mates left the FC. But what I love about the 14th is that you can play however you want. I honestly found myself addicted to Island Sanctuary. And I still enjoy playing all the roulettes and especially alliance raids (‘twas always my fav content btw). It’s way less stressful when you play the game extremely casually as a solo player. And that can be fun, no matter what others say.

Been feeling very much this way and just made an Alt recently to get away from the stress of my main. Glad you came to enjoy the game again in a new way

I'm really glad FF14 is very solo friendly. I just wanted to experience Final Fantasy and didn't come to socialize, like most multiplayer game communities online, you face a lot of the same hang-ups in people arguably more pronounced with it being online.

Im so happy this popped up in my recommendations, because this is giving my play style validation. I'm one month into the free trial, and learned very early on that I love crafting. Gaming to me has always been slow and grindy, as I try to 100% the first playthrough. So I approached FF14 the same way. Since its also my first mmo , I really wanted to learn the controls before trying to join a group for rp and dungeons. The players are amazing and eager to help me with fates, but as someone's who incredibly shy in RL, when I become overwhelmed, I feel frazzled and a burden. I've only just joined the grand company, but watching my crafting/land jobs level up with a check beside every successful craft is just so satisfying.

Sorry to hear how you were given the cold shoulder without a real explanation. But you're right, it just proves that you were in the wrong group anyways. Sounds like you have learned alot, & in the end good people like you will always deserve happiness. Best of luck! 👍

This whole social death sound more like "How it feels to reach yours 30s"

I just left my fc today and honestly, I realized that all my friends actually left to. But I feel great and very similar to you. Congrats for finding your enjoyment again :)

Thank you for sharing your experience. As a fellow solo player in an (different) MMO world, I feel a little less alone. Thank you.

I just want to thank you for making this video. I feel you said a lot of things i needed to hear and that explain why i have not been enjoying the game for some time now. I too am mostly a solo player, have been for 10 years since 2.0 and tbh I feel pretty alone myself. A lot of it has to do with the people I hung out with and some of it I feel was my own fault but seeing that its not just me that has felt this way and seeing how you got passed it is very helpful. Thanks!

Im happy others play ffxiv like i do

I relate to this so much. I have joined so many FCs because I felt like I wanted to make friends, and then left so many FCs because I stopped logging in because the FC can see when I log in and I didn’t want to be obligated to talk to people every time I log in. I’m also not interested in high end content. I still enjoy being in a world populated by other players, I love doing fates with strangers, but I also want to log in and not talk to anyone a lot of the time! I’m now a “free agent” and not part of an FC, and enjoying doing a lot of the same things you do!

This right here...everything hits so close to home. I am mid recovery from various social stigmas but it feels so good to know I am not alone. Also, FISHING IS LIFE!

I only started playing this year, after burning out on D2. I got super lucky and got into a friend's FC full of super patient people who enjoy running older content, a fistful of mentors who enjoy helping new players, and a bunch of crafting maniacs who will throw gear at you if you mention hitting a milestone level-up even casually in chat. I also do a lot of fishing, creep through MSQ really slowly, soak up the cut scenes, and enjoy the ambience. It's really nice, but admittedly I had started a first character and felt like I had to rush through to catch up, then regretted it, rolled a new character, and have been doing it my way ever since. With a little help from my friends when I need it, and a little social time when I have the energy. I'm glad you found a way to enjoy the game, it's so easy to get stuck mentally in the "gotta do everything" gamer trap, but it's so nice to be in a world that actually rewards you if you stop to check out the scenery, catch a few fish, or plant a garden. Subscribed.

Due to my schedule it's really hard to be anything but a solo player, but going through an experience like you did and still being able to get back in and find your joy playing...that's really inspiring. Thanks for sharing not just your story, but also your characters, and I love to hear more about them. So few people go into the lore of their characters and their personal journeys in these video essays, and that's the stuff that gets me hype to play again, so I appreciate that. God bless, keep enjoying yourself, and have a great forever.

Im glad you found a way to enjoy the game despite everything Im also a solo and really love the game but its weird getting into the community; its like everyones deep into the fandom and Im just a busy student who likes to login sometimes after being offline for months...

My friends constantly told me catch up catch up. It took me a year to do ARR, cause it was just a gdamn slog. I was so alone, and the entire time they just kept encouraging me to catch up. Fast forward, I'm at the start of Shadow bringers and they are saying how much they can't wait to play. But these aren't just my ff14 friends, they are my discord friends, we do everything together, and I know most of them haven't been subbed for months. So it simply feels like they want the OPTION to do stuff with me, but I know deep down, if I was max level, I'd be just like them, bored with nothing to do and no reason to log on. So I took my time with the game, and so far I don't regret it. But it is... so ****ing lonely. I got to do Omega with them, and that was really the first time in 3 years I got to play with them. So here I am, once again trying to find the motivation to keep going, because I know they want me to catch up, but they still just cant' find the reasons to play the actual game with me. *MASSIVE SIGH OF FRUSTRATION* Edit :Also real talk, your friends are huge assclowns for blocking you. That's so ungodly lame.

Been playing MMOs forever, literally since before MMOs technically even existed (I'm talking MUDs and MUSHes) and one thing that always happens in these games is 99% of people you meet and befriend you will lose touch with. It can suck, because you make great friends and then they're just gone, but also its kinda awesome once you realize there are nearly infinite number of new friends just waiting to meet you. Just gotta take that leap instead of sitting around feeling lonely. And becoming comfortable with playing solo and having that solo outlook can be a huge help when you're in one of those social rebuilding phases. Starting over somewhere new can eventually even become fun, I moved to the new datacenter when I returned to 14 this most recent time and its been amazing meeting new people and being surrounded by sprouts again. Last time I started playing WoW again, back at the start of Dragonflight, I started up on a new server and played Horde for the first time since the original launch, what a trip that was. Now that I'm back in FFXIV again I'm looking forward to even delving into some roleplay again which is something I haven't done in any MMOs in years after being soured about it by some unwanted ERP and relationship RP pressure.

This was honestly a pretty good video and one that spoke to my heart of hearts. I have a rather "petite" social battery and I've been left behind and forgotten more than a few times so I went through a similar "journey" as yours. Please keep the videos coming and I hope more people find your content (and find it as pleasant as I did :P)

100% Ive been playing this game for 4 years. the most fun I have in the game is when I do it my own way. I have a wonderful group of friends now but moslty I play solo and jump into FC hat when people have questions etc. I LOVE the housing aspect in this game as well.

Thank you very much!! I greatly enjoy solo play. It's nice to hear others experiences as solo players and how they best utilize their time in game. I'm enjoying doing everything on my one and main character. Wishing you all the best!!

This is the best attitude to have about FFXIV, maybe even MMOs in general, in my opinion. For myself I never really considered to do the MSQ with others because I understand everyone has their own way of playing a game. Some care for the story, others don't. And that is fine. Always play games like YOU want to and not how others would like you to. Otherwise you some day come to the realization that this is like having a 2nd/3rd or even 4th job to you hate to do but kind of feel like you're obligated to show up to. And that is not why you play games. Games are meant for you to recover from your stressful day not add to it. Whoever reads this: Guys. Have fun and enjoy what you love! 🤗

This video is truly beautiful. Thanks so much for your story, Suave. The older I get - the more "solo" I become. Be blessed and continue sharing.

Online communities are too toxic these days to even bother playing an MMORPG. I had a lot of fun playing Dark Age of Camelot back in 2000-2004 though, before the genre was ruined by awful developers & awful communities of toxic players.

glad i watched this. I played 14 in 2017 for about a month, then stopped, then picked it up again due to the duty support feature and im loving the freedom i feel from it. i have social anxiety, so learning dungeon mechanics on the fly with veterans charging through full steam can be overwhelming. dont get me wrong, ppl have mostly been great, but needed to hear that its ok to just play the way that makes me happy.

I used to play Elsword. I was the leader of a guild, a pretty large one too. Was pretty young too. Not going into detail, but things went downhill and I decided to shut down the guild due to so many drama that kept happening. Tried joining other guilds, but it never felt the same. So I decided to just go solo. It was fun, gave me an ego boost being able to solo things. But it later got lonely, it was really fun playing with folks. Ended up quitting the game and I found Phantasy Star Online 2. Joined an Alliance, and similarly I was rushed to finish content and ended up getting tired of the game and was on and off. Honestly wish I took my time with the game and enjoyed it all fully. I joined FFXIV, and even though I'm not in an Alliance, I do enjoy the company of joining queues in dungeons and the fact it's a team-focused game. Too many MMOs' communties force you into playing solo for the sake of flexing that I got tired of that toxicity and elitist mindset. I don't have to be in an Alliance, but being able to help randoms and making friends along the way is just as nice for my journey. I've later found a good friend group who has been very amazing people I've known for 2 years now, that now it's difficult to play games by myself anymore. They're very blunt people, which I like a lot. I got tired of people who sugarcoat things because they're highly likely to talk about you behind your back, or kick you without explaining things and they always act passive aggressive and wait for things to pile up to escalate things. Being solo for a while made me understand what I like, but now I've found people who fit with the new version of myself makes life even better.

This was a lovely video! It's always great to get unique perspectives from all types of FF14 Players. It can be easy to loose sight of people like you when you all ever see is the mainstream playstyle. I'm happy you were able to find YOUR joy in the game. :)

I've been playing for about 1 years now and I'm completely a solo player. I joined an FC for xp boosts and whatnot, and they don't require anything from me, so it all works out fine. I only have 5 ppl in my friends list, 2 of those are active and we never do anything besides play triple triad. Lol over all I'm satisfied playing by myself seeing as I don't have a lot of free time to play, and I'm enjoying the time that I do have. Also, I NEVER skip any cinematics I haven't seen before. I'm not here to please others. I'm here to enjoy the game myself. If I make friends, great. If not, no worries.

Ive been a solo gamer for a few years now. Sure Ill help anyone if they ask but for the most part i log in, do my stuff, bounce.

Thank you so much for sharing your story. It's made me feel not so alone. I had a horrific experience in WoW with my former guild. I'm autistic and was being bullied for my limitations. My boyfriend and I quit and tried out FFXIV. We loved it. But a few of my old guild mates came with us. I thought they were our friends, but they began harassing me in FF as well. Basically, they wanted my BF and I to rush through the content so they could raid. And when I couldn't go fast enough, the whole thing ended very badly. After my experience, I'm afraid of being very social. FF is great, because you can do anything in the game, without having to deal with others. You can be as socially active as is comfortable for you. It's nice. But both my BF and myself were so burned, we had to walk away from mmos all together. I still suffer from anxiety issues and depression. Healing has been a long road. I haven't played FF for a few years, but your video has inspired me, and I think I might try it out again. I'm sorry you went through that. But this has been very helpful. Thank you so much. Btw, the video was really good. Well done =)

I love that more and more people add their takes into the mix and this was a really good video. I also love crafting and gathering, and it can be so chill to just sit a fish for a while. Admittedly I have lost a bit of that while being in "endgame" and raiding and feeling like I need to do extremes etc. This video got me thinking I should just go to a spot and fish again. Thank you for posting this

It's always nice to know that I'm not the only one who went through it in this game and community. I started out the same way, solo, until I moved to the RP server and started meeting Rpers and say they're interested in my character. This is a long story and if I made a video it would be about 2 hours of just letting it all out 😅. Moral of the story is, not everyone has good intentions AT ALL and I almost completely left the entire thing until I met some people that gave me faith in this community. Advice for this community, please please please stop bringing your trauma to people who don't know you and then lie on, guilt trip, manipulate, and gas light the person who just wants friends.

What a beautiful video, and I don’t even play Final Fantasy, thanks for taking the time to do this

Thank you so much for this video. I have a few friends in this game, I've joined an fc and had a RP group before, but I always end up going back to playing solo. I was never much of a social person and that bothers me a lot, but it's important to understand that it's okay to be like this, and sometimes this can be really difficult. This video reminded me that there's nothing wrong with me, this is just the way I am and the way I play games. I wish you all the best, hope you keep enjoying the game and having a great time!

I love this kind of video about people’s unique experiences with MMOs.

I feel exactly like this from time to time, sometimes it's great to be with people and sometimes it's just nice to be alone, that's the greatest part of this game and any MMO that allows it. I'd like to think I have a pretty good social battery but on some days I just want to be alone and that's fine, do what you enjoy and live how you want to live. It's good that you bounced back up and found enjoyment again, some people get burned and never come back or they just turn into someone completely different, to accept and heal with time is a good and mental health is even more so important to look after.

This was a great video. It really hit home with me and I still struggle with this. I have a blast playing solo for sure. Yet I do miss playing with my friends. Yet I enjoy the story and my pace of gaming which is not always for others. I stopped FF14 years ago. I think before BLU came out. My friends kept playing leaving me in the dust, by all means was completely fine. I didn't think I'd be able to get back into it at the time with similar family and life issues. I tried to get back into FF14 when SOLDIER came out. My childhood of FF7 came out in me a little and I was spending 6+ hours daily up to 12 hours. I was back in the game and I was enjoying it again, yet trying to catch up with my friends was turning my gaming into a chore and not fun anymore and I thought I was burning myself out, so I stopped again...Just recently I was thinking about not telling my friends or anything about starting up again and just play for myself more and if I caught up to them then they would then find out. Yet the road is lonely, and I do wish I had a duo partner to just vibe with really. Yet people never seem to stick around to form any lasting bond. Could be me as well since I have autism and not the internet meme version. heh. I miss social cues and or emotionally just not interested and stay silent in fear of saying something i may not mean and lie. Or may just say the wrong thing. Anywho, tl;dr is that your video was very soothing and opening up about yourself reminded me I'm not the only person to feel the same way. So, thank you so much for making this and I may actually pull the trigger and start playing FF14 again for myself. Thank you Suave.

Thank you for this video I am back at the game for the first time since release. I'm not super social or good at chatting with my controller and I struggle with that aspect of this game. But I wanted to just say thank you for reminding me that the game is what you make it.

Good first video and glad people are talking about this subject more. I played FFXI for over 3 years with a group of rl friends till they all decided to quit. Was hard to play after that. When i started FFXIV i made some friends and started an FC. Lasted 2 years before another FC came and convinced a bunch of players to leave and join them. Been on a few servers because of stalkers and some vile people i was unlucky enough to meet. Now i play solo. I do everything alone and am even using the NPC's for dungeons more and more. It's lonely as hell but i am still loving the game.

Great video. Back in the day, it felt harder to solo game FFXIV as compared to, say, WoW because of mandatory group content and things being gated by MSQ progression. However adding in duty support has made things much easier. It’s always awesome seeing other players finding their own path to enjoyment of a game.

Thank you for this video. I felt quite close to this. I for many years have been a solo player. Playing a multitude of multiplayer games looking for some interaction but in the end resorting to being solo. Close to a decade ago, I too had experienced a "Social death" but in another game called Ragnarok online. I was part of a guild that felt like family. We were extremely close and it only took the leader leaving for it all to fall apart. I have not been able to join a single group of people that I could call "friends". I just started up FF14 myself and have been worried that my current mental thoughts would have a hard time progressing or doing something of worth in the game, but your videos have helped me in this regard. Thank you. I do not know how long my journey will be but I will try to make the best of it.

I’ve played WoW, EvE and FFXIV for well over ten years. Rotating between them as expansions come and go and patches make or break aspects. I’ve played exclusively solo. Never raided in WoW, and probably never will. Have my own guild that I made the hard way in 2009. I needed a second account. And to log in twice to get that started. Have my own Corp in EvE with three characters I used to,play simultaneously (completely legal in EvE. The devs used to actively encourage it with a marketing push to get people to multibox “The power of two”. Played FFXIV solo since original release. I might be lucky as my family, social and work life are very full and active. I’m in my late 50’s and gaming was always a way to get away from people. An escape from people. I,like the idea others are playing around me. The economy is real, the comparisons of skills, classes etc can be made. I use chat all the time. I just don’t play with others. Recent stats for WoW suggest the majority of players have never done a raid and almost half consider themselves solo players. I found that comforting. Seems my circumstances and relationship with MMOs is shared by a huge number of people. Alone. But never lonely. I hope you can find your peace for the long term.

Thank you for sharing your story I'm sure a lot of 14 players understand what you've been through in one way or another and the developers of the game get that as well, which is why they are going for a more RPG experience to satisfy both type of gamers and that just makes me love this game even more, it is just as you said it there is no wrong way of playing this game ^^.

I've been a solo player since 2016 and have gotten almost ever class to max level each expansion. Id love to have more people to play with but social anxiety has kept me from reaching out to other players. I try to do my best to be positive when I do chat in dungeons/raids/trials but I just cant find people I can comfortably talk to and game with no matter how bad I want to. I'm really glad FFXIV is built in a way that caters to solo gamers because its not the games fault I have anxiety.

Glad to be here for your first video on this. You may have given me a fresh perspective on my own experience(s), and/or at least a few ideas for some things I want to try. Thank you for sharing. I know you’re mostly solo, but I’m curious to know what server you play on. Maybe I’ll come say hi someday when I figure out what I’m doing.

Wow what a great video, regardless of whether first or not. Thanks for sharing! Your comment on how your speed of play was out-of-sync with the others especially resonated with me. I love taking my time, savoring the world, reading and/or hearing the story of a quest or dungeon or other adventure. I can indulge perfectly when on my own or with Duty/Trust support, but the moment I play with others it's like I stepped on greased ice and it's GOGOGO. Now that duty/trust is throughout all story I'm going to come back and play and savor every moment. If I can find some others who value the same then great, otherwise I'll be happily exploring and going through the story.

I solo RP myself. I have 1 character that's the WoL in the story and I have 10+ alts with various background. There's the duskwight lancer who's shunned by Gridania, the Sea Wolf musketeer trying to revive the musketeer guild, The mysterious gambler who comes and go as he pleases etc.

FF14 respects your time and choices. It’s why I always come back to it. Also this video was validating. Thank you.

This video is such a vibe, and thank you for giving us solo players a voice ❤

Very nice first video ^^ also man, the fc bit hits close to home

Certainly relatable and pulled at the heartstrings. Similarly I joined a decent FC/discord etc...they were nice and helpful (at first). When I maxed WHM and could FINALLY play stuff with them, they already had their established teams for EX/Savage content and not inclusive. They were also much younger and had more time, so hard to relate. So I joined another, with the want of trying harder content, that promised fun and not hardcore. Still being new, the pressures to perform and learn (at the time) complicated tactics and rotations, and *sigh* FFLogs... Soon niceness turned to a toxic environment... It was so hurtful that I gave it up. Took me a while to get back into it, created an alt to redo the story since (like you) often rushed, and now I'm happy being a solo player. Yeah I depend on PUGS for higher content but good enough now to get through it! Couldn't be happier!

This resonates with me on a different perspective. While I appreciate those who like to solo FFXIV and be content with that decision: I find myself wanting that "positive" engagement from other players that is supposed to drive FFXIV as a MMO. While I have only been back for about a week or so now: FFXIV is proving to be a lonely experience. Being content with being alone is different from loveliness that can develop. After all: one can be in a crowded room and still be lonely. Being alone and loneliness are not the same. Having said that: you are correct in that there is no one specific way to play FFXIV. While I too have my "quiet" days where don't say much to anyone even in RL: that doesn't mean I will ignore someone in game if they speak to me. As I said before: I returned to FFXIV as a new player yes; but one who remembers certain things about the story (muddled as those memories maybe). While I have done some things solo: (for me personally) I am hoping to find a group of people to share my experiences with along the way and a group to fill in the missing pieces of the story in case something goes over my head. Yes, I am currently a solo player and am ok with that for now; but, even those who to solo content all the time still long for a connection to others on some level. That is human nature and in a MMO: sometimes it can take more energy to play solo that it does to play with a group. Perhaps that is a failing on my part; but, the ultimate goal is to enjoy the game the way you want as an individual. Personally: I wish I could just solo it which the desire for connection with others. Kudos to you that you are able to do that and enjoy playing FFXIV. :-)

Thanks for sharing your story! I was shocked to see you had 76 subscribers only!!! I started the game 3 or 4 years ago and after I had finished Shadowbringer before Endwalker's launch, I was on a mission to recommend the game to all my friends xD. I was playing solo except for that one time I was invited into a Blue Mage Spellfarm in Trials and Seat of Sacrifice Extreme as a filler. I didn't need content from other people to feel appreciated or entertained to stay in Ffxiv. It's the lore itself, the Npcs, the gameplay, the customizations of my characters, and the potential of me making 12 alts and treating them all like DnD player characters that kept me engaged. However, I wanted to do endgame content, too, especially after tasting what endgame Extreme Trials alone were like. I liked the whole puzzle aspect of figuring out how to solve mechanics without party wipes in collaboration with your team by screaming at each other in the discord all day lol. Unfortunately, I'm an autistic introvert, who really couldn't be bothered to play with strangers. So this is when I "gaslit" my friends into giving this game a shot. OW BOY I did not expect how all of them took 100 years to even get to Shadowbringer ESPECIALLY my gf, but also how one of them became exclusively a crafter who spends every waking moment optimizing her MGP, island sanctuary, and skybuilder's scripts because she despises battle content for its "chaotic nature"(like alliance raids) and her fear of failing. She is a true solo player connoisseur who occasionally does gardening stuff in the FC, gives advice in FC chat, and joins our/other friends' treasure hunts for materials. Other than that she couldn't be bothered. My other friend is a carbon copy of me SOMEHOW, who tries to do a little bit of everything, and my girlfriend is a covert completionist. She will take even 200 years to get to any point of the story JUST so she can spend enough time to level all her classes and do all the side quests before even reaching Endwalker lol. Everyone plays the game differently. I'm socially traumatized by my experiences, which makes it hard for me to even TRUST people with my characters and their lore. I only RP with these said friends I had convinced to join the game because I can trust them to not judge me or tell me how bad I am at the lore and how bad my character writing is. People in the RP community are so weird NOT TO MENTION the excessive amount of MODS mind you. They will find a way to ruin people's enjoyment of the game and it sucks. I have a friend who has a RP-focused FC but I can tell from the vibe of the people, that it's not my cup of tea. I don't wanna talk to a guy who seeks validation in-game, an incel, a lore elitist, and a guy who is actively homophobic on main (and im a sapphic enby so idk). As long as I stayed away from those folks and hung out with my closest friends I was able to fulfill any niche desire I ever had in the game

Wonderful vid. Glad you're enjoying the game again. 😊

Me who always become solo player in mmo eventhough I had many friends, it's just look cool 😎

The vibe in this vid is palpable. Friendship and loss, finding oneself, finding the joy in once sorrowful things. It's refreshing. I'd love to see more about your characters and their stories.

Wonderful video! Sorry for all the hurt you received, that sucks. Best of luck with your future videos! :) I am a solo player in GW2, playing for story and exploration since i started playing in the early 2010s. I had two friends to play with for a little bit but one i grew apart from and the other I introduced to the game and then shortly after stopped playing, dwarfed my hours and did high-end content. We haven't played the game at the same time since. I joined a guild alone and was around for events and such for a couple months until it imploded over drama I never heard about. I made one very solid friend in that guild but haven't talked to them since shortly after that happened. It was really nice to idle in a city and just chat about random stuff. I have yet to join a guild and make friends that I care about since. I haven't shared the same experience in FFXIV because i started playing this game with friends that I still play with to this day. I'm lucky in that regard since GW2 has been a game that none of my friends were interested in playing but I liked it enough to go it alone. I deeply respect anyone who has found enjoyment in a multiplayer game and chooses to go solo for any reason because y'all truly love the game for what it can offer.

This reflects my own experience so much. Having a group that was interested, but moved on, family issues taking up time and energy, even having a fishing main on my single character. I so wish that I could find two or three other people that enjoyed going at the casual pace I do. But I'm also happy (or maybe just accepted) playing the game alone.

I'm going through the same issue with FF14 currently and my solution was also to create a custom story for my character. It really does create a new type of enjoyment for the game.

I think your basic point is that everyone should find enjoyment in the game in the way that is most genuine to them. And that message is relevant regardless of whether you are an ultimate raider or a free trial player. It's so simple, but it is something that people can lose sight of.

Honestly, it depends on the server you're on. Most of '14's servers are settled from beforehand with a 'specific' that the players gave them. I first began way back in the day on Jenova in Heavensward and I tried to be a solo player. It didn't work out for me and I quited. I only came back to '14 in 2020 after Shadowlands flopped and started on Mateus. I got hooked on the RP aspect (I used to very regularly and daily RP on WoW) and stuck with the game and an FC, but as soon as some drama happened that got me almost kicked out from the FC I pondered to quit halfway through post-ARR. I remained and continued playing. Found a new group of friends. And enjoyed the game at my own pace. Most of your experience in '14 is very reliant on the people you interact with. Solo players have a great time without feeling scheduled or pressed into activities, but the social aspect tends to require people to dedicate time to others. I don't necessarily see 'social death' as an issue if you can push through the sensation of being exiled. Because it's honestly just one group of people doing that out of hundreds and throusands. I've had to deal with this issue in WoW, SWTOR, ESO and FF14. It hurts to have dedicated so many days, weeks or even months to one group and then having to just put that all in the past and behind you when it comes by collapsing. But the answer is to always push through. People come and go, memories are kept and held close, defining who you are as the years go by. You will always have the choice to find new friends, as most FCs are actively recruiting and happy to get new people onboard. It's very likely some will not work out at all. That's just going to be the norm on any MMO. Find the one that fits and you definately will have a wonderful time, but don't take the time for granted. It is fleeting and should be treasured as long as you can have it. I personally will never forget my 2nd FF RP fc group, even if our parting was more or less a bitter series of weeks where activity went flatline and some people left to an ERP-centric exodus fc from ours. But the times we had before that collapse? They were some of the most beautiful I've ever had.

I've had "friends" block me too. It's soul crushing. I'm so sorry that happened to you. ☹💜

I get this; I mainly play as a crafter main and while I sometimes do things with my FC, when given the choice, I'll craft/gather on my own and just give things to the FC for them to have fun. I don't feel sad when I don't do group content, I just do my own thing, but I will join FC events when they really want me to join.

This just in: person buys game, plays how they want to. More at 10

I didn't think I would write something but after watching Dusklow and your videos I felt that I should. I started out playing ff14 when a friend asked me to join and the game sounded fun. She is a high end raider and didn't have a lot of time to group up with me as I went though the story. I did end up becoming active the in the rp side of the game during Stormblood. This is where things got bad. Some people in the group I rped with ended up convincing the others to drive me out. Drama that I don't even remember anymore. In short, from that point I have never felt more alone playing a mmo. It was hard to even login to play. I ended up leaving the game for a long time. I just started playing again and I'm finding joy in it. I do miss the rp side as am also on a server that has little rp. Still very much a solo player, but I still hope to find some friends in game to run content with.

I'm glad you found a way to enjoy the game! I've played off and on for a couple years. I haven't wanted to commit to paying each month unless I'm sure I'll be able to get my money's worth. As a result, I've been playing catch up for the MSQ for a while. ARR was such a long grind it took me over a year to finally finish it. I flew through HW. Struggled through SB and had to take a break in between. Now I'm almost done SHB and have loved it. One things I've noticed though, is that I always get an invite to an FC. Once I've joined, everyone is friendly, but there's so many established friendships with history, that I never really feel like part of it. If I ever unsub for more than a month, I'm kicked from the FC. I'm a part of a good one now. They ever gave me a big room at the FC for free. But I still mostly play solo as I'm running through the MSQ. I'll strike up random convos with people while I'm waiting to get into a dungeon. Or as I play as a Fem Roe, when I see another one, we'll usually chat and become friends. But I've stopped putting the social pressure on myself, and if convos happen, they happen. If they don't, I just take my time through the story. It's been a nice experience so far.

With how sensitive the community is in XIV I don't even say hi when I do roulette

This is a story of someone rediscovering themselves, and the joy they encounter while doing so. It feels great to find another kindred soul that is unattached. I was introduced to the game by someone I was close with at the time. The game outlasted our relationship. But even when I gathered the courage to return, I found out that remaining with the character and name I made to play the game with someone else colors my experience to a degree I never thought was possible. So about some time back, I pulled the trigger and fantasia’d, name changed, and changed homeworld. Begin again, as they say. I have to say, I never felt more free than before. Your message about playing for yourself and not for anyone else resonated greatly with me. I am glad you made this video, and I hope too you have a good time playing this game. Signed, another Solo Player.

Beautifully put. Lovely, gentle inspiration. Thank you for sharing.

I have been playing solo for a while now and I love being able to explore things freely with no commitments. It can be lonely sometimes, but I enjoy the freedom. Thanks for sharing your story.

being a solo gamer is great