Why Over Pursuing Leads To Her Being Too “Busy” To See You

Рет қаралды 25,351

Күн бұрын

Why you must let women come to you at their pace or they will become too busy to see you.
In this video coaching newsletter I discuss an email from a recent coaching client who is 37 and new to my work. He became involved with a woman who is 45 and just lost her husband through mutual friends about a year and a half ago. Things started off hot and heavy and then she started backing off and becoming too “busy” to see him. She pushed him away several times and last summer they didn’t see each other at all. He notices that she does this about every 6 months and breaks things off, only to come back again and rekindle things and few months later. Now she has become cold and distant since the new year and he’s unsure of what it means. However, she claims that she is just too busy to see him, even showing her schedule to him with numerous appointments and obligations. He says they have never been exclusive despite all their time together. They both have children from their previous relationships and scheduling dates has always been difficult.
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Пікірлер: 103

@devin3607 4 ай бұрын

If they are in love with you they will initiate, chase, and do all the work. You can borderline ignore them if you choose. Its worked for me

@AlexanderPalumbo 4 ай бұрын

Best way to go hands down

@SSJavenger 4 ай бұрын

Not if they are insecure. I have a girl that is head over heels in love with me, and has tried to break up with me crying saying ''why me? whats so special about me? Let's end this now while it's still early''. Women are deranged creatures. After explaining to her why i like her other than sexual chemistry, she is now softer, yet still incredibly insecure.

@marcrigor6423 4 ай бұрын

Right but disclaimer: will only work on one's who are super into you. Maybe 20% of them.

@devin3607 4 ай бұрын

@@marcrigor6423I've only got time for that 20% anyways 😂

@oddbox2764 4 ай бұрын

Lmao crazy but true

@aronchas 4 ай бұрын

Can't help it but I LOL so hard as corey say the classic: blue balls, chad thundercock, and his robot impersonation😂😂😂

@ashvicena 4 ай бұрын

"Cockblock" 😂

@jameshunt3504 4 ай бұрын

She Got what she wanted from him, and now he's just an Ego boost unfortunately for him. But even though its difficult a man needs to separate his emotions from reality, & Let his BALLS DROP & SLOWLY move on. This is why you need to be ok with being single, and or talking with multiple women simultaneously 😂

@PeterKraus1 4 ай бұрын

This dude is 37 over pursuing a 45 year old with three kids...

@Champ1988 4 ай бұрын

He's in complete scarcity.

@nickwatland3565 4 ай бұрын

I did it before . Glad i was weak and she left me .. just got back from Thailand to see tons of hot chicks . Live and learn !

@krizzay95 4 ай бұрын

Man, perspective is everything lol because that could never be me

@Robert-ri7mt 4 ай бұрын

@@nickwatland3565 i just got back from Bangkok, 2 days ago. Mind blowing how many are there are out there.

@aspe434 4 ай бұрын

Right, a 37 year old man can do way better than a 45 year old mother. He should be able to get women in their 20's.

@Ryan-yn1qc 4 ай бұрын

dude those extreme cases are EXTREME, that is fucking wild

@xGamingZo 4 ай бұрын

A rock on the gas peddle 😂sounds like something on a movie

@johnq4520 4 ай бұрын

It's messed up but unfortunately there are some women out here who do things like that.

@21Cherrylicious 4 ай бұрын

Just block her and move on. She's clearly playing games.

@johnq4520 4 ай бұрын

Problem solved.

@jameshunt3504 4 ай бұрын

Exactly 💯 EGO BOOST BITCH. LOL

@itunes8442 4 ай бұрын

no lol , you did not read the book 10 - 15 times i see

@21Cherrylicious 4 ай бұрын

@@itunes8442 I don't need to I'm a woman that doesn't chase men nor to I apply to any sort of games to keep a relationship.

@kjhustleguy 4 ай бұрын

You don’t sound like a alpha wrong 👎🏽

@donfdunlapyt 4 ай бұрын

I needed to hear this now. As a reminder. Because I'm likely going through a breakup and all I can do is wait. I'm not going to wait for her to come back and I will move on with my life, but I will wait in the sense that she will contact me if she's ever interested again. But I tend to fool myself sometimes and hearing podcasts like this reminds me of the path to take. Let her do the pursuing.

@marcrigor6423 4 ай бұрын

Best advice on earth for your situation: push yourself to start dating again. Realllllly takes your mind out of scarcity mode and forces you to happily realize that a good chunk of your "love" for her is just loneliness and the desire to be near "someone" not necessarily her. When you realize that fact, you are so much happier and less outcome dependant.

@ironyouth3384 4 ай бұрын

@@marcrigor6423100% my dude. I didn’t realize this years ago and a buddy of mine would always say: “The best way to get over a woman is to get under another one.”

@Robheinn 4 ай бұрын

My friend is going through a similar situation. I keep trying to tell him to back off but he won’t listen and just sent her flowers with a sappy note 😩

@DarkroomMedia007 4 ай бұрын

Your friend has a little bit of hope if he can get himself under control. A wise person once said that it's easier to pull someone back from doing too much, Then to kick somebody in the back and make them do more.

@bobross1829 4 ай бұрын

This was the hardest thing for me to learn and blew it so many times and did not know what I was doing wrong. You always have to let the women text call and pursue YOU. I always thought after a few months, especially after being intimate, the race was "over" and you could just text or call or ask them to get together, because why not? You are dating right? But especially with good looking women, nope. They have to come to you. Society and culture has taught us the exact opposite. Women can spin your wheels for a year or MORE if you let them. Until they want to marry you, you always cannot over pursue. There is not magic line where you do not have to be a challenge anymore. If you really like her and want her in a relationship, you actually have to force yourself to stick to this plan.

@DarkroomMedia007 4 ай бұрын

Sounds like the program.A masculine woman would be game for. The type that are domineering, Controlling and a nightmare like fatal attraction chick. Very sexually alluring and ready to put it on a man but will be a nightmare when you won't give her a relationship for giving up the hoochi coochie. The type of woman that you will throw onto the trash heap when you're done with her. A feminine woman is not trying to text and call and show up for man and not get anything Time a day from the man to get to know her as a person and her to get to know him.

@Champ1988 4 ай бұрын

This is why you should date multiple women. Not every woman you see regularly will be suitable for commitment. This woman likely was emotionally unavailable if we're being reasonable. She was a widow, and clearly just wanted this man on an as-needed basis. If he was dating other women during this period; he naturally would've phased her out once he vetted women more into what he was looking for. You don't have to seek relationships with every woman. Enjoy her for what she's willing and able to give and keep looking while you do.

@RogueHero 4 ай бұрын

Facts

@SergioFernandez-cj4mt 12 күн бұрын

💯

@Mike_Cosentino 4 ай бұрын

You can be doing 1% of the reaching out but some women will still have a double standard. I’ve had her call me at work, discharging my dad from the ER, driving, etc. even when I told her I have a certain boundary. But yea a lot will play the texting games, stonewalling, silent treatment sometimes out of immaturity and what they learned from their ex-narcissistic husband.

@MalaIzagreba 4 ай бұрын

Thats why some men have second thoughts if dating really worthy such a hassle, after some time you get used to person, kisses, making out, s*x, and thing that is left is relationship maintenance, mirroring interest level, organizing dates, adjusting to her needs etc., or just simply be single and enjoy with friends, extra money and time. Before at my early 20s my priority was to get in serious relationship and i dealt with all kind of crap just to maintain relationship, but now-days i prefer mental peace, and if i find some suitable girl i would rather casually date, before i couldnt think of not getting serious relationship- maybe because i didnt tasted it, now after i passed this school its like im indifferent in case when i see couple hugging i think to myself i too did that at their age

@DarkroomMedia007 4 ай бұрын

And this is why when a man is expecting the woman to pursue ninety percent of the time they get a Fatal attraction psycho, Domineering boss chick who's masculine and loves the chase. instead of a feminine woman who is reaching out for contact and trying to get to know you.

@HeadlinersCuttingZone 4 ай бұрын

I didn't realize how hard it is to keep a female around for a relationship by hearing these videos for the past 2yrs know constantly everyday what's so special about them that us men have to be a certain way ,I may be wrong I mean I've tried to nice guy they do you wrong they don't appreciate non I've tried the bad boy I'm a bad guy like damn can't never pleased them

@CherryCokeNixon 4 ай бұрын

Women haven’t changed (though their natural behavior is more amplified by modern technology and social mores), men have. Push back on women who try to manipulate you and watch them gain respect for you. They’re all like this. They always have been. But your ancestors knew how to handle it. You don’t because you have been poisoned by “the new rules.”

@trevorvantiel453 4 ай бұрын

"Red Wings" absolutely gold Corey! Just busted a gut laughing. Thanks for the morning video. You just made my day. Appreciate what you share with the community. Take care kind sir. Great video!

@CB19087 7 күн бұрын

That's so interesting. Im a gay woman and always struggle with which gender role to go with. I naturally have a more masculine energy but have been doing the pursuing. Recently I initiated something with someone and left it at that. She occasionally stops and chats, but yesterday I was mid conversation and she walked by, i just quickly acknowledged her, and carried on talking. She definitely seems more keen now! Who knew! I was trying to hard all these years 😂

@EbonyMtofmuscle 4 ай бұрын

Grateful to Corey, been a subscriber since 2015 read his book probably more than a 100 times Every read I always catch more gospel from the coach reading between the lines so I tried it: LOOK HER dead in the eyes (when the time is right and tell her to ACKNOWLEDGE YOU If she really loves and is attracted to you-she will Really absorb the book, and you'll find it ain't just mirror her, don't chase etc, that's just strategy, it's like Corey says "Attraction isn't a choice"

@victorbheredia705 3 ай бұрын

THANK YOU COACH COREY WAYNE.

@christopher-yi3rm 4 ай бұрын

its obvious she still has grieving feelings coming back and she feels he is getting too close..

@thetruthoutside8423 4 ай бұрын

Good for her.

@laner1172 4 ай бұрын

Ok well people say "have multiple woman".. but it's not that easy. Getting even one chick to be into you or open to dating is a lot of work. I'll get lucky if I meet 1 woman a month who I am compatible with, single and has interest to date. And just.. waiting then for someone for weeks if not months? Corey is right about his ideas, but I don't mind reaching out multiple times if she's still responsive. From all the videos I've seen, let's say beset case scenario she comes back after 2 months. Is that not disrespect that you were discarded and then used as a backup plan> I'd rather ask, then dump her totally/move on then just have things be up in the air for weeks or months. Sign of respect.

@savking6188 4 ай бұрын

Who said you have to be compatible with her to date? You only encounter a few amount of people in life that are compatible with you. And you only need to get one woman interested in dating you, to get the ball rolling. Women are like birds, you catch one you catch them all. If getting one woman to be interested in you is serious work then you better settle for playing with your hand

@SomeGuy-inthe314 4 ай бұрын

Dude it IS that easy when YOU focus on YOURSELF and chase YOUR purpose. YOU’VE got to participate in YOUR own rescue. Corey changed my life 6 years ago; and he can YOURS too.

@laner1172 4 ай бұрын

@@SomeGuy-inthe314 that's nice, I've focused on my WORK and PURPOSE.. woman do not just magically appear. You still need to put in the work at cold approach and bars etc.. all I'm saying is that while Corey's approach is effective for SOME woman, it also is a gigantic waste of time if you're just waiting on some girl for 2 months.

@jeffysacks 4 ай бұрын

You know what pisses me off? When a girl you wanted, didn’t give you the time of day but you show you made $30k off bitcoin on FB and she messages you. Like, nah woman. Left her ass on read.

@savking6188 4 ай бұрын

She wants you to pa off her student loan

@doggpound9319 4 ай бұрын

Why would you show off how much you made off bitcoin to the public? Seems like your seeking attention.

@jeffysacks 4 ай бұрын

@@doggpound9319 nah just showing my friends they’re stupid for not buying and calling me stupid for buying years ago. 30k is a joke for what I’m making on alts. Everybody wanna be rich but don’t know what it really takes. EVERY family member messaging me and I’m just like “idk, just luck I guess” bout to go way off the grid. Remember people laugh at you first then ask how you did it. Like I forgot you belittling me bruh? Goofy.

@doggpound9319 4 ай бұрын

@@jeffysacks you just proved my point goof ball you're seeking attention, doesn't matter how much money you make if you're still a loser get out of your feelings cause it's easy to see the insecurities on you.

@Pillshere31 4 ай бұрын

just two days ago the woman i have been dating for a couple of months broke things off, likely due to me having a moment of weakness and becoming overly emotional and perturbed. it stings a lot, it went very well up until that point. will she be back? i dont know and honestly i dont want to think about it. i will use this time to feel what i feel, overcome it and learn from my mistakes.

@erikheijden9828 4 ай бұрын

I doubt it's because of one moment of weakness, she was probably looking for a reason to end things and that was an excuses she could use.

@NMTDelightfulMusic 4 ай бұрын

Yes, she dried out and is waiting for a reason to get rid of you. Probably has somebody else hitting her.

@jroll5858 4 ай бұрын

@@erikheijden9828 Exactly. If a women is really into you, it would take you cheating/beating her to leave you. And even then they might find an excuse to stick around. In this case she used one moment of weakness as her excuse to leave. Usually it's cause an ex came back into the picture or she met a new dude & it was finally time to make the full leap into a new relationship

@Mihaicradu15 4 ай бұрын

@@jroll5858 You're also right, just as erikheijden. @Pillshere31 It depends a lot on what foundation you had, if it was a good one or if it was full of arguments. Also, regret and guilt come later for dumpers, relief stage follows, then the memories they had with you. I've been in this situation and I still am. I know it's hard to hear this, but waiting for her until she decides to come back into your life would be a big mistake. I'm not saying to get over it, but to move on with your life. If she comes back, good, if not, she was not worth the effort.

@DarkroomMedia007 4 ай бұрын

@@jroll5858This is. Very true!. I don't mind a man.Sharing their feelings or shedding a tear in extremely difficult time. A woman like me can handle it. I dumped a boyfriend long time ago because he was very domineering.And insecure that pissed me the hell off. It took a lot because I'm very traditional.I will get on a man's program and was on his but the excessive trying to keep me in my spot and keep me in.Check just enraged me and I had to show him better than I can tell him. He kept stalking me and trying to get me to come back to him but I was straight up done. Went on to find my husband very shortly on and it was smooth sailing. Nobody wants to be doing the right thing.Already and then somebody comes to tighten the reins And project their insecurity on Us.

@CoachSteveJandS 4 ай бұрын

I have heard girls say before that even in the middle of moving they made time to get together with men they liked (even with a deadline on a rental drawing near)

@920utdoors9 4 ай бұрын

Well I must suck then

@Ak-47ram 4 ай бұрын

I only meet chicks online cuz I’m a hookup only guy. I get decent results but I encounter a lot of “I’m too busy” type of girls that I recently learned to completely ignore if they cant make time to meet within few weeks of talking. They’re either actually too busy or on most likely there to waste my time for attention. Either way they’re both not worth bothering with. I used to go along with them back in the days when i didn’t know any better and boy they will drag you for years without ever meeting if you let them.

@savking6188 4 ай бұрын

Only ask one time, if they are too busy then that's it.

@savking6188 4 ай бұрын

Most of the time, the ''I'm too busy'' is just another guy.

@Ak-47ram 4 ай бұрын

@@savking6188 yep. but I can care less about other guy since im just want a one night stand guy he can be the provider I just dont deal with chicks. overall theyre all pain in the ass especially single mothers.

@provost5752 4 ай бұрын

Shes giving the minimum effort required to keep him as plan C it sounds like.

@nunolopes8926 4 ай бұрын

Bro just tell her she not what you want and block her

@johnq4520 4 ай бұрын

Problem solved

@seanc546 4 ай бұрын

Agree. I think she's still dealing with the loss of first husband, and didn't giver herself the proper amount of time to grieve.

@natefmx333 4 ай бұрын

Bas idea

@trrealestatenycrealestate200 4 ай бұрын

the only thing to fear is fear itself

@christopher-yi3rm 4 ай бұрын

its obvious he still going through the grief process and does not want to have heart break on top of her grief. so she is holding back she does not want to rush in with him, she still has memories of her passed away husband, she cant just forget her dead husband and move on with no feelings and the kids probably think she never cared about theyre father straight after he died, its not just her but her kids aswell getting over the death. and her he is rushing her straight after a death, to her and the kids he looks like he dont care and not listening to her.

@amproductions7819 4 ай бұрын

Anyone know if Corey Wayne addresses a situation where in 7 Principal's: You're unable to have her come to your place in the evenings (for legitimate reasons) but you're capable to go to hers? (Not every situation is blk/wht) My instincts say, in this adapted version; go, focus on HHH, but if things don't progress (interest increased but not enough) casually end the night & stop all forward movement, until sex becomes her idea. Disclaimer: Recently picked up the book & on my third read.

@seanc546 4 ай бұрын

Sounds more like a her problem, than a him problem, honestly.

@chriscarr7397 4 ай бұрын

She probably being too "busy" getting ploud by Chad or Tyrone!! So if I were you, I would leave, block her on everything and move on. She's not worth it!!

@Phil-bv4dh 4 ай бұрын

First 💪😤

@ExOTrOnHD 3 ай бұрын

Watched some of your videos and I learned for sure that texting is just there to make dates and sex at the evening of a date. But how do you date if you dont want to have sex in early dating, because of religious reasons?

@margaretc5679 4 ай бұрын

He needs to be dating other women. This whole video made me so sad for him. She does not want to be with him. Period.

@CherryCokeNixon 4 ай бұрын

Sounds a lot like there’s some Top 20% guy in the background who shows up in her life for a month at a time every 6-9 months.

@user-hv5we1nx7h 4 ай бұрын

Why i was running game to make sure evrything goes through lmao

@BloodyHeck 4 ай бұрын

The only problem is that men have to initiate the majority of the time. If an average man isn’t the one pursuing, he won’t be in a relationship because women don’t pursue regular guys.

@christopher-yi3rm 4 ай бұрын

probably her kids did not like him and do not like having him over all the time, women put kids first.

@RogueHero 4 ай бұрын

After turning him down the 2nd time , he should have just made her a booty call. She clearly wasn't that into him and was just stringing him along until something better shows up.