Self Defense for Beginners Step One: Stop being a beginner

“That’s assuming that you’re young and healthy.” Man, if you ever wanted to know why some people appreciate your content, this right here: I’m in my late 30s and have an autoimmune illness. Surgery up and down my right side. Haven’t been able to run a 25K in at least five years. The missus is also the same age and has a chronic health issue too. But the fact that you routinely mention real-world stuff like this and the context it provides is great.

I remember when I got in my first fight, I had done 4 years of Ninjutsu and I felt like a badass. But as soon as the guy grabbed me and pushed me against a wall my brain went “fuck fuck fuck fuck!”. I however managed to throw him hard to the ground and run away, but I couldn’t let the fear go for weeks. Even though I “won the fight” I felt like a failure, because I had planned all sort of stuff in my head like “if someone grabs me I’m gonna do this and that!”, yet in the situation I couldn’t do any of it. I realized the “combat sports people” might be right about sparring being important. I was good with throws so I started doing Judo which was the best decision I ever made in my life.

1. Get in good physical shape 2. Practice in competitive martial arts so you get used to punishment (develop mental strength) 3. know how to move well to offset weight/size disparity 4. Develop skills that are useful (speed, strength, targets, strategies)

My favourite line - anyone who says size doesn't matter should go punch an elephant. I'm between 120 and 140 pounds. People have been telling me they have a technique or style that will nullify size differences all my life, and that includes practitioners of competitive martial arts like BJJ. It just isn't true. That's why weight devisions exist

I have to say, this is great for women to know. I was attacked, from behind, years ago as soon as I stepped onto my high school campus. It was like a wrecking ball crashed into me, knocking the air out of my lungs. Your brain throws all kinds of nonsense at you, like “oh look, the birds are chirping”, as your brain desperately seeks out normalcy. The only thing that allowed me to snap out of that shock and surprise as quickly as I did (and it still took a few seconds) was the fact that that wasn’t the first time I had been hit. And he didn’t “hit” with his fists, it was his body as he grabbed me, running up behind me and grabbing me. Had he just punched me in the back of the head, it probably wouldve been game-over. I was able to fight and struggle long enough, protecting my head as much as possible, until he finally decided (I think, he was never arrested so I never got to ask him) he didn’t want to get caught and drop me. I bought time, and I did it well, but it wasn’t pretty, it wasn’t elegant, and I, in no way, “kicked his ass”. I was 16, and I’m lucky my father made sure I could handle myself enough to do what I did, but he didn’t go easy on me. Thank GOD. Otherwise, the jarring and the wind being knocked out of me would’ve been the end of that scuffle. I think it was the fact that my attacker wasn’t expecting me to fight so hard to keep myself rooted to that patch of ground-I refused to let him take me away even if it killed me-that got him to change his mind on me being a good target. He just didn’t want to get caught, and I’m positive that’s what saved me. Buying time. But I’ve never felt more powerless than I did when I hit him with all my strength and it felt like I had punched a mountain, it did nothing. At first. Getting through that and fighting back anyway was the key, and I wouldn’t have been able to had I not experienced that feeling before. Anyway, I wanted to share that in case it helps someone else. That’s about as real as it gets, and since most women who get attacked like this don’t end up faring so well, I share it whenever I have the opportunity just in case someone needs to hear it.

One of my favorite Ryan quotes when talking and size in a fight. If you're big, you need to be good first, if you're small you have to be better

I had an ex who carried a stun gun and said she was always safe because of it. When I asked her how fast she could pull it out and use it. She fumbled through her purse and then forgot how to start it. Almost a minute passed and she realized how bad her plan was. Any decent plan has a level of testing.

At my old Krav Maga training place, one of my giant guy teachers did me the favor of coming at me for real when we were practicing getting out of someone choking you from the front, and I was BAWLING. I got through it and learned the move, but even in a controlled environment with someone I could trust, it was terrifying. To all the other ladies watching and reading, definitely there are going to be assholes in classes who relish the idea of hurting people, but it's SO worth it to shop around and find people who respect you enough to be sporting and courteous, but real. Get bruises, be better!

I knew a girl in college who had been taught to drop to the floor and kick, on the notion that legs are stronger than arms. Upon her demonstrating this, I pointed out that she had just done half the attacker's job for him.

In some parts of the north of England it is genuinely the women you need to defend yourself against :) carry on

Thank you for being honest about what women are able to do. It is a little scary to think about as a woman and a mom of a little girl, but it is all true.

This is GOLD! This is what I’m always yapping about. There are so many bogus programs out there that are marketed to women and I just cringe at how impractical they are. I’ll be re-sharing this for sure!

The elderly women in my building have a pretty good self-defence strategy - they never leave their apartments. Cheers!

I am a person who has practiced martial arts for decades and have fought many times so in my experience there is no women or man self defense there is only self defense. so my advice to people who think these women self defense will work for real is to just train how to fight and learn basic principles of self defense or de-escalation tactics and train hard and most importantly test the techniques you train in under pressure so that you know that they work in a real confrontations.

My 15 year old son and I have been practicing Karate (yeah I know) for about 10 years. One thing I try to do is reinforce what we learn by explaining NO ONE attacks like we practice. The first time I I reached to really choke him he froze ( he was 10). Now, any movement towards his face he reacts much differently.

Someone talking about the importance of physical fitness and self defense! True for anyone! Of course that's enough but definitely necessary! Excellent video!

This was the one issue I took with the notion that no one dies from bad self defense (I think Icy Mike was talking about it, if I remember correctly). He was spot on with most of what he was saying, of course, but there was one caveat I felt ppl should know-I’ve seen “no contact self defense for women” classes, and I personally know women who took these classes and then walked out of them believing they were prepared to defend themselves. And then they started taking risks they wouldn’t have taken before, like attending events alone in downtown Atlanta, which requires parking in parking decks late at night. Now, could I blame the class itself for causing someone to get hurt or worse? I think there’s more to it than that (like common sense, or a lack of it), but I do believe it could be a factor in women believing they were prepared when they absolutely are not. Could I prove one of those classes DIRECTLY led to anyone being harmed? No, so Icy Mike was right in that regard, but I did feel it was a bit more nuanced than saying they NEVER cause real harm. Just my opinion, take it for what it’s worth.

God dammit here's me commenting again on this dude's videos. This is the best martial art / combat sport channel ever... Please keep it up!

Bigger guy here, yeah size definitely matters. I’ve rolled with really small female purple belts and blue belts(I’m a white belt) and although they have way better technique I’m so much stronger than them I can basically just keep them from doing anything. Strength is important

The best thing to do as a women looking to defend against a large stronger man is close the gap, start doing wrestling classes and testosterone like you are Brock Lesnar in UFC fight camp. I promise you once you are twice the size of Gabi Garcia and you wrestle like Khabib, you'll be unstoppable.

My first spar was an eye opener for me. I was in pretty good shape already and my form, for a beginner, wasn't even that bad. I'm also a fairly cautious person, so I had my guard up and my eyes open. Within three seconds, I'd taken a punch to the face and thought, "Fuck, that wasn't nice." But before I was even done thinking that, I'd taken another punch from a different angle, and I was out of position, and I had no idea what to do so my wild jabs hit absolutely nothing. And my opponent was a beginner as well, so it wasn't like I was just being outclassed by an experienced fighter. I just sucked and had overestimated myself massively. I still suck, and I'm still scared every time I spar because I don't want to get hurt (or hurt my sparring partners), but I'll keep doing it because it's the only way I can train myself to keep functioning if I ever end up in a real fight.

Everytime you put out a new video, and you're still using my music, it's exiting! thanks again

Great video as always, I’m always shocked about the things people (especially women) think will help them in a fight.

Most martial arts schools have these "Women's Self-defence" events to give women a taste of training in a martial art. They are ment to get them interested and want to join up for regular classes, then as they train on a regular bases they will develop the skills to be able to defend themselves better. No school should make out that after they have done an hour class they are fully trained to defend themselves in any situation. There is nothing wrong with someone who runs a martial arts school to drum up some new students, as long as they are honest about what they are teaching. When I was training in a dojo, years ago we did some women's Self-defence, but we made it clear, we were teaching them some basic skills that needed to be practiced regularly, and it was not garenteed that it will work, but it gave them an idea what the style was that we did and we would.have several female students there to help out and answer questions. We had some women join and train regularly so it was good for the school. Your point about size and strength mattering is spot on. While experience and training can help, there is a point where brut strength and shear size and weight is too overwhelming. The best defence women can have is to be aware of there surroundings and the situation, avoid a physical confrontation and get to safety before it gets to that level. A weapon can be a good deterrent and could cause a would.be attacker to back off and leave, but as you said if you are not trained with said weapon, it could be a liability to you, and even make a situation more dangerous for you as a woman. Thanks for making this video.

TLDR: women's self defense is the same as guy's self defense.

Ultimate women's self defense = Learn Ameridote :D in all seriousness, very good explanation!

Strong emphasis on a woman getting accustomed to the strength, size, and height of a man trying to punch you or wrestle you. I'm a 5'9" 140lbs guy living in the west, I may have denser bones and muscles than an average woman but I have experienced the height and weight difference against 200lbs men. Women do not have to outpower a man, they just need to know how to relax when interacting with strong men and practice their martial art system diligently till it works

this video is so good that i'll show it to my students whenever they say technique is all that matters. also an example of how size matters. there was a video where brian shaw (4x WSM) grappled with dustin porier, and porier was pretty much unable to do anything without brian going easy on him. the weight gap was like 250+ lb, but it goes to show that technique is not always everything. (dunno if khabib wrestling a bear is a counterargument to this though, lol)

One of the things that got me into Sylvie Ittu's muay thai videos and vlogs is an hourlong clinch training she led. There is a moment in it when she's standing at kicking range for the guy a head taller than her for demonstration and asks, "Am I scary?" Then she closes to inside her pocket, completely inside his guard with all her limbs at threat range, and asks the same question. My point here being the importance of that minimizing an opponents advantages while maximizing one's own.

For the average person, self-defense is like flossing; most won't do it and when they do, they spend as little time as possible doing it.

I need women's self-defense because my wife is bigger and meaner than I am. Fortunately I am stronger and more skilled.

I made a comment on a video of McGregor and the Mountain sparring about how you can fight a person but not physics and no lie it started a years long saga of an argument.

That's why although I'm interested in teaching self defense, especially for women and children, my main knowledge and time is being spent towards being a top notch Personal Trainer with Strengthening and Conditioning specializations. My go to beginner advice for self-defense is and will always be "lift heavy, get strong." The interesting thing is many average women when told to lift weights and get stronger will avoid lifting heavy and instead go for light weight and high reps. So need to be specifically told "lift HEAVY", it's the quickest best way to start to overcome that sex based size and strength gap.

Oh man, your channel is so damn good. So much debunking nonsense (which could get people killed, so you're quite possibly saving lives here) in a clear, concise and entertaining manner, top-notch scepticism. I like how you draw from like, dozens of different sources that on first glance have nothing to do with martial arts (like that one video where you talk about organizational stuff). Aaaaaaand some feminism here and there, absolutely love it dude. One question: What about a kick between the legs? For women against men, I mean.

Yup 😄 I got choke by a guy twice bigger than me and I thought I could get out but I couldn't so 😃 embarrassing

I just treat women kindly. No need to defend against them this way.

Yes just remember that in a full fight most dudes will absolutely destroy a woman. So you want to separate and get away. Not separate and keep fighting cause he will quickly turn the tides as long as he is bigger or knows how to fight. Which if he's attacking you it means he's probably bigger or knows how to fight

I agree, every women’s self defense seminar I’ve seen and that’s a lot is bs that only serves to make the mc

Lol I hate to see that some people believe that watching KZfaq videos is something that can replace actual training (something I believed at like 8 years old)

I totally agree, size matter a lot. It’s not just stronger fists and grabs: it’s much more capability of taking blows without being stopped, which makes most traditional striking poorly effective. Sure, a highly trained and strong woman can take down a man 20kg bigger in like 10 seconds, but notoriously (and obviously) most women nor have neither want that level of muscles and strength, ‘cause it would just change their body, their looks etc…Good cardio respiratory resistance, sufficient grappling and striking and some sort of a gun, whatever may be, sounds definitively the best option.

It's never that easy without getting beat up or hurt a little bit

Love your videos! Do you think there is a weight or fitness threshold to aim for? I'm sure the answer will be something like, "It Depends" but I'm curious what your thoughts are.

when I was younger, when things got hot - I always told any big(ger) guy: "Watch out mate, your nose breaks as fast as mine" It kinda served me well (luck was with me obviously) As a BJJ and Boxing guy today- I had to learn that mass matters...big time... DESPITE the fact that BJJ is considered to be not so affected by weight differences- I can just speak for me but when I roll with a bluebelt 30 pounds heavier than me. Man it is definately running uphill. In Boxing: The difference is hilarious. Id say today I shouuuld win most fights against non combat sports ppl even if they are heavier but Id really go in with massive respect to their size. Even if it was "just" 20 pounds. We have a guy in the gym who is ripped as fuuuu... I mean I literally have never seen someone that ripped in real life. 8 Pack, massive chest, everything. BUT he is small- and young (18ish) he weights about 120, 130 maybe 140 pounds- I weight roughly 160 and am let´s say similar physique to the guy hosting this channel. When we roll- you can feel he is strong but it is very manageable. His physique at my size? Probably he d kill me with one hand. So despite him looking like hercules all his intimidating muscle is still lighter than my averagely trained muscle in total. I was very surprised how much just overall objective weight matters. But when you look at it closer its not that crazy: He and I have probably about the same muscle mass just because I am taller. Although his muscles are "oversized" for his body, I will probably have around the same amount of muscle mass - just wider spread.

Five stars !! 🖐👺

I agree with everything you said however after years of teaching martial arts and WSD classes, I have only had one woman out of over 300 over the years who came to my WSD seminars that had prior training. I always recommend that they train, eat well, spar and work out but many want a “quick fix”. They want the baby without 9 months of carrying it or going into labor. I try to teach things for someone untrained knowing most will never put the time in.

High levels of strength, cardio, coordination, and procreation Hells yeah

You’re an honest guy.

Oh you’re talking about women defending THEMSELVES. I thought you were talking about how to defend yourself against women.

Be better!

Is cardio kickboxing a good way to shape-up before any martial art?

The 3 most important things for women to know are: How to grip it, how to aim it and good trigger control. 🤠

What’s your martial arts background also I agree with you 100 percent a 185lb guy gets a blue belt and he beats a massive portion of the population a small woman needs a brown belt it’s sad but the truth

A fool and their money is always easily parted. At least my wife has always been realistic about it.

I love how he clearly and apologetically crushes PC notions nobody can speak of. Hope he doesn't get cancelled for saying women aren't equal to men or something like that. Keep up the good videos!

Another thing is having enough confidence. The dude at 0:58 got a running start, he was ready to throw down. Reverse the roles and I'm sure a woman at full sprint can knock down an uncommitted man.

It's disgusting that there are countries where the law forbids you from carrying anything for her self defence with this reality.

"The average woman will almost always be beaten by the average man. So you have to make sure that you're not the average woman." I was absolutely vilified for saying this by feminists in years gone by. Apparently I was sexist. So I can't help giggling when these same feminists are (rightly in my view) complaining about Trans Women in sports. I can legitimately complain. They can't.

This is quite a good video! For women, I'd say to narrow the targets and weapons used. Meaning attack the eyes, throat, face, before groin. Use nails, scratch the face, be ballistic and vicious.

Best female self defense - --- Get a big boyfriend or Travel in groups or buy a gun and train with it or get a big mean dog and train him to protect you or learn to run fast or be willing to spend the time to learn a combat art. it will take time. None of these alone will always work so do several of them.

This better not be another "just try to de-escalate and don't fight" video.

How to learn self defence 1- Learn mma 2- (optional) learn to use weapons and defend against them.

If a woman spend decades on training martial arts and weightlifting/strength training she might be able to beat an average-below average guy, but the second a man has a year of mma and weightlifting its over for women no matter how much or what training they got

I disagree on the womens self defense issue = I have taught womens self defense and something is better than nothing when it comes to deterring a predator. Several of my students stopped an attack by turning from Prey to Predator by attacking back. This was enough pain therapy to change the Dingo's mind of an easy defenseless victim. Again when your life is on the line - you have to try something = And practical testing of techniques will show what works and what does not which you are high lighting.

3rd

You might want to be careful, you're starting to sound a bit like "Master Ken" Much of what you say is accurate, but your "all women's self defense is BS" line isn't accurate either. Does size, strength, physical condition matter, duh, yeah. Can a two hour seminar turn a woman into a killer? No. duh again. Are many women's self defense seminars a waste? See, it depends on what expectation you have. Your focus is "Can a woman likely 'win' in a confrontation with a man, and will a women's self defense (WSD) class do anything to change that?" If we accept that as the standard, then much of what you say is accurate. Women are inherently at a disadvantage against most men. True. In order to have a chance to 'win' they wil have to train and put in a lot of work to overcome their inherent disadvantages. True. What it seems like you are missing is that self defense and especially WSD is not about winning. It is about survival. It is about escape. It is about not being a helpless victim. And when you look at it through that lens, many WSD classes, be they single session or ongoing classes do have value. See, in my experience, most women have no interest in getting into any kind of physical fight. So, they aren't really interested in the kind of hard-core training which would give them some chance of 'winning' in a fight with a man. But at the same time, they don't want to become victims. Any decent WSD class will be as much about situational awareness and avoiding bad situations as they are about fighting or techniques. And there are techniques that can be learned in a fairly short time that will significantly up the chance of a woman (or a man) getting out of certain situations. Grab releases and other quick moves can let someone have the possibility of getting away, where if the person was never exposed to them they wouldn't know and would much more likely be victimized. Self defense isn't fighting. Self defense is about taking someone who would normally freeze and be victimized and giving them some options that may or may not work, but will still be infinitely better than someone who has no clue when encountering violence. One of our instructors is an active duty cop who continually emphasizes that if you can get more than eight feet away from your attacker and run, 80%+ of the time they won't bother to follow. Note, I"m saying nothing about the various videos of the "one move to stop any attacker" online. I'm talking about seminars and classes in person that can and do serve a vital purpose. Most people, men and women, aren't interested in devoting their lives to martial arts. I know this as I have been in martial arts since the early 80's. Knowledge is power. More knowledge and more training makes you more powerful, but for most people any type of martial training is not where they choose to spend their lives. Saying that because a WSD class won't give you the same kind of protection that training for 40 hours a month will, that it's worthless is BS.

If Muay Thai doesn't work for women then nothing will work.

you talk a lot but say little, you never really tell women how to train to defend themselves or where or what methods...you are a professional contrarian with little practical advice...