YT The rudest dagger in history and where to get one

No video

YT The rudest dagger in history and where to get one

Рет қаралды 30,335

2 ай бұрын

Bollock daggers were a real medieval weapon. Daggers that had a handle shaped like a 'cock and balls' were quite the fashion item from around 1300 to 1550 across large parts of Europe.
Mostly quite stylised; some not so much.
What? Why? and most importantly where can I get a rude one these days.
Available here todcutler.com/...
Origins of the bollock dagger • How did the Bollock da...
How bollock daggers began (maybe) • Evolution of the Bollo...
Tods vile bollock dagger • Tods vile bollock dagg...
For budget medieval weaponry of fantastic accuracy and value todcutler.com
For commissions and custom work todsworkshop.com
For merch todsworkshop.c...
For those who enjoyed Arrows vs Armour todtodeschini.com
Target posters are here todcutler.com/....
We have a Patreon page and if you liked this and wish to support the channel please consider having a look / todsworkshop

Пікірлер: 364

@thechumpsbeendumped.7797 2 ай бұрын

Don’t wear this in public or you’ll get arrested for carrying an offensive offensive weapon.

@tods_workshop 2 ай бұрын

Great comment!

@thechumpsbeendumped.7797 2 ай бұрын

@@tods_workshop The daft thing I meant to write offensive offensive weapon but I was still chuckling from watching the vid.

@tawelwchgaming8957 2 ай бұрын

Here i am.... having worn one myself.... I made some good impressions.

@MAarshall 2 ай бұрын

lmao 😂

@malahamavet 2 ай бұрын

the video was informative but the fashion poses were glorious

@tods_workshop 2 ай бұрын

Thanks

@krissteel4074 2 ай бұрын

"Get your hand off it" probably has multiple meanings now

@genericalfishtycoon3853 2 ай бұрын

At what part of manufacturing does the wood working become working your wood with this project? 🤔

@anthonydevito1298 2 ай бұрын

"...And not just the backwards parts like England" 🤣

@Intranetusa 2 ай бұрын

Making phallic shaped objects & phallic shaped weapons seems to be a multi-thousand year old tradition that is universal across the world. 🤣

@torazoul 2 ай бұрын

Never get's old. 😉

@reidycruise 2 ай бұрын

Men love taking the piss 👍

@exploatores 2 ай бұрын

my guess is that the first was made by a group of teenage guys.

@christianokamura9419 2 ай бұрын

The amount of “Bollock Daggers” found in military porta potties are astonishing

@papalaz4444244 2 ай бұрын

Asperger's always existed

@Ghost_wheel 2 ай бұрын

Is that a dagger in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?

@elricthebald870 2 ай бұрын

Yes.

@mitcharcher7528 2 ай бұрын

Yes.

@tods_workshop 2 ай бұрын

Can I say that "I like to keep my bollocks in a pouch?' . Exactly that sort of level of humour these would have been created for

@Chlupac010 2 ай бұрын

@@tods_workshop And you say we have bad taste :-D Hehe i hope they will be still in stock by the end of the month, I am seriosly considering one :D

@scholagladiatoria 2 ай бұрын

Do you make them in full grown man size as well? ;-) Absolutely disgusting, good job.

@nwl999yt 2 ай бұрын

Hang on Matt are you saying that's not full size

@andytopley314 2 ай бұрын

Are you saying these will give insufficient penetration?

@TheLoachman 2 ай бұрын

@@nwl999yt I only realized who had posted the previous comment when I read yours. I am subscribed to more pervies than I realized. Good company . . . Skall? Shad? Raf? Have you left your (re)mark here as well?

@SlothSkeleton 2 ай бұрын

What do you mean? That's average size.

@unocoltrane2804 Ай бұрын

My ex told me mine was the biggest she ever had.

@CodfishJoe 2 ай бұрын

My only criticism of this video is that it could've used more of Tod just absolutely laying into us for asking for these 😂

@RichWoods23 2 ай бұрын

It's all our fault and definitely not his.

@dgoodman1484 2 ай бұрын

You did that entire segment with a disturbingly straight face! And the comment about backwards England was pure gold! 😆👍🏼👍🏼

@MonkeyJedi99 2 ай бұрын

Hard to take him seriously, but I think he got the thrust of the topic out there. (hehehe)

@RAkers-tu1ey 2 ай бұрын

Interesting! As a wood worker I note that the shape is also a pretty good use of the material to create a functional hand guard. It could be just a block of wood the same general size, but that would be uncomfortable to wear. Much thinner, and it would split off with use. I would guess someone came up with just sort of an oval, and some other guy said "hey, wait a second..." and the bollock dagger was born. Oh, crap - I should have watched the whole thing before I commented. Great Video.

@genericalfishtycoon3853 2 ай бұрын

Gives a different perspective on the term "woodworking."

@mitchmitchell515 2 ай бұрын

@@genericalfishtycoon3853 nice

@RAkers-tu1ey 2 ай бұрын

@@genericalfishtycoon3853 Ohhhh no,no,no,no 🥵

@iantait309 2 ай бұрын

@@RAkers-tu1ey Yes just replace the or with an!

@tods_workshop 2 ай бұрын

Rakers - I totally agree and in fact came to this conclusion a while back and made a film about how I think it evolved starting with a log and working my way through the forms until I ended up with the bollock dagger - A good use of a cheap resource to achieve a 'good enough' target. Link to that film in the notes

@walker1812 2 ай бұрын

I wish all commercials were like this, bit of history about the product, talk about the design, mention they’re for sale, pose with the item, fin.

@KangaRooTube 2 ай бұрын

Imagine seeing an army with these equipped.

@Crimsonfangg 2 ай бұрын

They strike while their enemies are crippled with laughter.

@tods_workshop 2 ай бұрын

There kind of was. Clearly there were all manner of daggers available to an archer type in the 1300's, but a very common form was the bollock daggers so a very large percentage of English archers would have sported on of these

@Fusildechasse 2 ай бұрын

Tod, not only are you an amazing craftsman and historian, but dammit man sometimes you are a straight up comedian at the highest level...lol

@FortuneFavoursTheBold 2 ай бұрын

I can't begin to imagine what archaeologists in the 25th century would say about this when they discover some antiques from the XXI century, and matches some crude thumbnails in the sources once known as KZfaq.

@DIREWOLFx75 2 ай бұрын

Oh that's EASY! "These daggers are obviously ceremonial."...

@FortuneFavoursTheBold 2 ай бұрын

@@DIREWOLFx75 you are making future Metatron mad.

@mandowarrior123 2 ай бұрын

@@DIREWOLFx75 must have religious significance, been used as part of fertility rituals

@EriktheRed2023 2 ай бұрын

The modelling! Spot on! 😆

@paulherman5822 2 ай бұрын

A certain Monty Python song comes to mind. With the line, "But don't take it out in public, or they'll put you in the dock." 😂

@iantait309 2 ай бұрын

I was thinking of the Morcam and Wise two little old men in deck chairs.

@Tzephtan 2 ай бұрын

Todd doing fashion poses wearing a ballock dagger... It's a timeless classic. Brilliant!

@euansmith3699 2 ай бұрын

Ah, the primary weapon in the Todgerhoffer School of Fighting. The Tod Cutler version appears to have a Prince Albert. Thanks for another fun and informative video.

@Vox_Nihili 2 ай бұрын

Did you sharpen them with a Grindr?

@tods_workshop 2 ай бұрын

Of course! Great joke

@Kradlum 2 ай бұрын

I don't think I've seen a youtube video with more bollocks.

@iainmc9859 2 ай бұрын

I had a spare highly ornate Toledo steel blade (probably a 1970's tourist item) so I had it cut down and turned into a bollock dagger thirty years ago. I wear it with my plaid, poking out from the folds, as a dirk (there's only one letter difference), its now become quite smooth and polished from lots of handling ... and yeah Tod, mine is bigger than yours !

@misolgit69 2 ай бұрын

mine was delivered the other day I couldn't wait to unwrap it and get my hand on it 😇

@tods_workshop 2 ай бұрын

Thanks and I hope it works for you

@misolgit69 2 ай бұрын

@tods_workshop Oh Yes very tactile 😇

@ivanjednobiegowiec7656 2 ай бұрын

50 y.o. me giggling like mad in 12 y.o. :D

@haydenwesley8530 2 ай бұрын

just bought mine 1min ago - fathers day present to myself...

@gorbalsboy 2 ай бұрын

Omg ,tod looks like a medieval flasher😊

@Rekaert 2 ай бұрын

That's a nice variety of Bollocks you have there Tod.

@johncartwright8154 2 ай бұрын

After the horrified reaction I received at a secure dog field, having a pink plastic dog-toy snake protruding from coat pocket, I must resist the temptation to purchase one of these. Tod is far to modest with the one he is modelling. If it was me striking a 'Freeman's Catalogue 1345' pose, I would of made a much bigger example for myself!

@davehogg63 2 ай бұрын

I love my Bollock dagger from you and wear it with my kilt as a dirk.

@iododendron3416 2 ай бұрын

A former roommate brought a bottle opener with a penis shaped handle from Indonesia. We found it in the cracks of the sofa she left in the flat sometime after she moved out.

@Pavlos_Charalambous 2 ай бұрын

We have those things in Greece as well Usually the handle is made from wood 😄 We also have wine bottles in phallic shape that during some festivals in mountainus regions there are the only thing available to drink wine from 😂😂😂

2 ай бұрын

"Come and get it".

2 ай бұрын

Or "get it and come"?

@phonix6665 2 ай бұрын

"Is this a bollock dagger, or are you just happy to see me?"

@mitcharcher7528 2 ай бұрын

I don’t I have ever purchased anything so swiftly. I’m giddy as giddy gets. I own a couple Tod Cutler daggers (purchased through Kult of Athena, shout out to the homies) and they’ve all been fantastic. I’ve also bought some chapes and belt parts from Tod’s site. Always been happy with what I’ve got. And I am beyond happy to get this. The wait is going to be maddening but well worth it.

@mitcharcher7528 Ай бұрын

Update: I received the dagger last night. Shipping was extremely fast from the UK to California. The dagger is fantastic. It’s hilarious and supremely functional. The spine is thick, the edge is sharp (not razor sharp, but plenty sharp enough for use), and the point is, um, pointy. The sheathe is also fantastic. Fits perfectly and has great detailing on the leather. And the handle? It’s everything I could want. All in all 10/10 experience. This was not the first thing I’ve bought from Tod Cutler, and it will not be the last.

@geo-fury 2 ай бұрын

This is why I prefer rondel daggers.

@tods_workshop 2 ай бұрын

I like the simplicity of these, but I like the extensive decoration possibilities with rondel - more canvas

@genericalfishtycoon3853 2 ай бұрын

@@tods_workshop Quite the setting of a subject to be discussing one's preferences of size and aesthetic qualities, quite sus indeed sir!

@LarryGarfieldCrell 2 ай бұрын

Once again, Todd has THE best commercials on KZfaq. :-)

@tods_workshop Ай бұрын

Thanks

@kimditchburn6388 2 ай бұрын

🤣🤣🤣 love the fashion poses!! Thanks for such an entertaining video!

@Double_J_48629 2 ай бұрын

"it's not about what _you_ want , it's about what the _customer_ wants" -- _Joe Dirt_

@ihtfp01 2 ай бұрын

If only companies like Disney could figure that out....

@JT_Soul 2 ай бұрын

I love my Antennae Dagger by Tod's Workshop, and I may have to add one of these to my collection as well

@tods_workshop 2 ай бұрын

Thanks and please do

@BradloRaul Ай бұрын

“And this, is the horrible result!”; gleefully shoves handle right up into our faces 🤣 Love it!

@V3RTIGO222 2 ай бұрын

A meme as old as human civilization

@tods_workshop 2 ай бұрын

Out of curiosity, does anyone out there know how old the oldest 'cock and balls' type graffiti, artwork, cave painting etc is?

@FiliiMartis 2 ай бұрын

2:10 That is a factoid I didn't know. 🤣 I understand the connection with fertility rituals in antiquity and before. But I find it so much more refreshing, and strangely comforting, thinking that in the medieval times they simply went for the shape as a joke.

@ptonpc 2 ай бұрын

Why do you tempt me! 😂 You just know someone in the medieval period would have been falling about laughing at Todd's original rendition.

@brettjones8622 29 күн бұрын

Your diy kit seems very balanced.tyvm.

@frederickheard2022 2 ай бұрын

I love how he kept framing it just in the picture 😂

@paulmears5330 2 ай бұрын

😂 lol, Tod's customer base is very... Based...😂

@Tone-def 2 ай бұрын

this morning I made a Belgian waffle in the afternoon I made a Frenchman talk bollocks

@mandowarrior123 2 ай бұрын

He was being Frank.

@tabull8180 2 ай бұрын

This has to be one of the best ads ever made 🤣

@Adam_Kristo_Christ 2 ай бұрын

Yeaahhh, I'll probably stick with the stiletto that I bought from you at Landsknecht Hurra last year 😅 Was an absolute pleasure to talk to you in person man!

@klondikechris 2 ай бұрын

Todd: the only armed model on the runway!

@Brandeena233 Ай бұрын

Todd is *truly* a man of the people.

@DH-xw6jp 2 ай бұрын

Looks like a dagger fit for Pince Albert.

@perniciouspete4986 2 ай бұрын

It's not how long the bollock dagger handle is, it's how you use it.

@poolpulse3447 2 ай бұрын

BWAHAHAHA.... Outstanding....or is it Standing out..?? Absolutely Hilarious.....😊

@mansfieldtime 2 ай бұрын

. Well I find out the USA Military has a thing called the Common Access Card. It is used to access their computers by putting it into the virtual access gateway. So the CAC is inserted into the VAG.

@Incandescentiron 2 ай бұрын

Fantastic! I just love your channel, and you're work.

@tods_workshop 2 ай бұрын

Thanks

@tomtruesdale6901 2 ай бұрын

You have done some funny stuff before on here, but I have to say I was laughing so hard my wife asked if I was O.K., so I made her watch. LOL Great dagger Tod.

@kevinmorrice 2 ай бұрын

i like to think that it was invented by some guy who woke up and thought "stabbing my enemy with a phallic dagger would be a great way to insult them" although considering how much they liked rude jokes, i wouldnt be surprised if someone just thought it would be a fun knife to wear down to the brothel

@user-kz8tw4vj7z 2 ай бұрын

"Oh that? That's my sex dagger, I wear it for sex, alongside my sex shoes and sex hat"- something I wouldn't be surprised that a medieval person would say and do

@klasandersson7522 2 ай бұрын

Hehe, It is a "screw you" taken to its litteral point! 😄

@kevinmorrice 2 ай бұрын

@@user-kz8tw4vj7z yeah, for all we know the bollock dagger could have actually been originally for wearing at a brothel, or for brothel workers to wear to show they worked at a brothel while also protecting from attacks

@PJDAltamirus0425 2 ай бұрын

@@user-kz8tw4vj7z XD I can imagine this for multitasking taking on two wenches at the same time. XD

@ilcattivo13 2 ай бұрын

Thanks Tod, You've made my day. Again :D

@easteuropecollusion468 2 ай бұрын

Adding an insult to a (stab) injury. Medieval Style.

@eoghanwilson5879 2 ай бұрын

Is that where the phrase “to get a bollocking “ comes from?

@perniciouspete4986 2 ай бұрын

Tod, you should make a zweihander version.

@TheLoachman 2 ай бұрын

I am soooooo glad that I swallowed (my beer) before I read that.

@leppeppel 2 ай бұрын

Glorious.

@bearbecue2 2 ай бұрын

Finally a dagger right up my alley ! Thanks Tod ! 😂

@entropy11 2 ай бұрын

Gotta say a single style of anything lasting over 250 years is massively impressive.

@tods_workshop 2 ай бұрын

Very true; little did. But they did evolve massively over that period

@Ralesk 2 ай бұрын

Tod damnit XD I haven't laughed so much on a video in a while

@Daveed56 2 ай бұрын

The more things change, the more they stay the same.

@LegateGallus Ай бұрын

I went to a local ren faire a few weeks ago, and I saw a young kid running around with a small larp dagger play fighting. I did not have the heart to tell his parents what kind of dagger he had.

@willyrackham2957 Ай бұрын

On the Mary Rose ..when first examined 68 ...Bollock daggers ...1 of fruit wood the rest boxwood ...of course Rod Matless has been making them for years and probably researched them more than most

@andrewrice2376 2 ай бұрын

While it is obviously phallic in design, I do think its not really all about that. Holding one in your hand and using it to thrust forward or reversing it so the blade is pointing downwards, the grip is very good, and your fingers don't tend to slide as the the lobes keep them from doing so. Thus, it is an excellent grip for a fighting man to have when he needed it. And as most are common men's daggers, this would make it ideal for either attack or defence in close quarter situations, where such a grip could mean the difference between life and death, but also, due to being easy to make, keep the price down.

@CaptainBogroll 2 ай бұрын

I can vouch for them - I’ve got two from Todd and they’re wonderfully made

@curlyexcile 2 ай бұрын

Fiddler's elbow technique required 😂

@pRahvi0 2 ай бұрын

Some craftman in the Middle Ages: crafts a bollock dagger everyone: "I want one too!" Tod Cutler today: crafts a bollock dagger everyone: "I want one too!"

@AdlerMow 2 ай бұрын

You should do a Short Sword one as well, to the size of messer, with the same oversized handle they have 😏😆

@tods_workshop 2 ай бұрын

And as one of you fabulous commentators called it….’The Schlong Messer’

@perritoDeSatanas 2 ай бұрын

I had to check the Bayeux Tapestry and maan that thing is huge i counted 40+ most of them in horses....but i did find one little guy on the margins XD

@mandowarrior123 2 ай бұрын

5 human cocks and a tonne of horses. William's horse is particularly happy.

@hawkshalfback 2 ай бұрын

Looking at the listing on your website, there are a few different colors available: Natural, Brown, Black, etc. Does that have any impact on the grip length...?

@mattpastell3728 2 ай бұрын

Oddly, I’ve never seen the male models on the cover of GQ magazine pose with a bollock dagger. Apparently, they aren’t as fashion conscious as I thought they were!

@tods_workshop Ай бұрын

Missed a trick there, but GQ if you are reading; I am in

@andymyers2759 2 ай бұрын

gorgeous petal!

@nevillesavage2012 2 ай бұрын

I like the dark one

@TheLoachman 2 ай бұрын

That's what she said.

@nevillesavage2012 2 ай бұрын

@@TheLoachman 🤣🤣🤣

@theghosthero6173 2 ай бұрын

Could you perhaps do a video on why the english rarely used quivers and used arrow bundles? I am interested in how they function, how broadheads dont get caught, how the loose string doesn’t let all the arrows fall to the ground. People often wrongly picture all longbowman with quivers.

@tods_workshop Ай бұрын

Good idea, but I think that crossbows used quivers almost always and longbows didn't. My understanding is easy transport, but that I am sure is not the whole story

@tomyorke3412 2 ай бұрын

They had a scene of humor back then. One guy holds the shaft while he shanks another guy.

@PiraticalBob 2 ай бұрын

You know you're going to eventually have to do a "Magnum BBC" version in ebony, right?

@NorroTaku 2 ай бұрын

okay this is wholesomely fun

@alexanderren1097 2 ай бұрын

Tod, that’s absolutely heinous and I’m completely horrified, disgusted, and disappointed by you! I’ll take 3

@750triton 2 ай бұрын

I've wondered if the handle was originally made from the "knuckle" where a branch has bifurcated

@adamrudling1339 2 ай бұрын

when you absolutely bollocked the order up

@HoJu1989 2 ай бұрын

Aaaand sold out. Good job, the Internet.

@charlie_marrow Ай бұрын

The medieval version of Truck Nuts

@OTTOVONempire 6 күн бұрын

you are my favorite Tod. and youre the only bladesmith i trust to handle my bollocks. so gentle. One question tho? Are the bollocks on the daggers cold quenched or is that extra?

@josephbroadway4722 2 ай бұрын

Dammit Tod, I'm tight on money but you've left me no choice. Hope itll be here in time for Ren fair season

@chengkuoklee5734 2 ай бұрын

Wow! Tod really fcuk your wallet

@Papadragon18 2 ай бұрын

Oh look, you can use both ends! I'm horribly sorry about that. Hilarious video.

@kimditchburn6388 2 ай бұрын

🤣🤣

@user-lc8ql5qu6c 2 ай бұрын

Cutting the side of also stops it rolling when put on a table.

@Arkantos117 2 ай бұрын

Genital humour is one of those things that trancends cultures and languages barriers. In a time without mass communication there aren't that many jokes/gags that you can do that everyone will get other than maybe some slapstick stumbling around which is harder to represent in an image/object. Also I wonder if there was some more sinister meaning, like forcibly stabbing someone and/or asserting dominance over them with your phallus.

@Halinspark 2 ай бұрын

If you make it a habit of listening to us gremlins, you're gonna end up having to make some really veiny ones with some decorative white tassel off the pommel. You know what we're like.

@YouTubalcaine 2 ай бұрын

My father always told me. . . never show your sword unless you intend to use it. Anyway, mine's broken. I've mistreated it for years. I used to go around stickin' it into everything. Stuck it into watermelons. . . just practicing. One day I stuck it into the dirt. . . broke the tip off. That really hurt me. But that's OK. I'm gonna get a new one. That's why I have to get into the castle. . . because that's where they keep the good ones. I need a good, strong one this time. But it has to be big. They can never be too big. . . not if you know what to do with it. You see, sometimes if they're big enough. . . all you have to do is show it, and people will run.

@MrDowntemp0 2 ай бұрын

Now make a bad dragon dagger

@Pavlos_Charalambous 2 ай бұрын

What I have noticed working for a while in retail is that phallic looking objects are always selling like crazy The closet they look the better I mean, who doesn't likes a crude joke?