I just kinda throw myself in it now. Awkward or now. I'll straight up talk about how it's like moving to a new school, again, but an adult version! It's interesting, and a very fun challenge.

Anna I love your content - so healing for me

I'm not new to mental health but I just have so many questions. Can't wait to take the journey and see what answers are revealed in diving into more content here.

Glad I found this channel!

I understood the heartache of my parents from a very young age and moved through life moving past the hurt, I thought because I understood their pain I had nothing to forgive. BUT understanding is only one part of the puzzle, I was denying myself time to process FOR ME what it meant for me as a child teen adult. Much love as always Anna

Is this abnormal as a guy

Superbly done, dear Anna, thank you, and brava on all you've risen to achieve and share, forging a lit path away from the thicket of thorny therapeutic models of reprickling. Such a balm you have crafted! bless you LOVE

Thanks for your channel. Do you have any links or advice for people who have CPTSD and because of this end up unintentionally hurting others. How do we heal from that? In your section about trauma driven beliefs I’m left feeling that because I’m not “partner worthy” due to being unavailable that I should just spend the rest of my life in the broken basket. I’ll keep watching your videos, thanks.

34:04, 35:29

I was lamenting over a female covert narcissist for months then discovered all the videos about narcissism and realize what was going I am sure having her be a narcissist made the situation much more complex she's not a good match for me anyway I just still am baffled that I could have really felt that I was in love with her deeply but it was only one sided😢

Tbh I feel completely overwhelmed. I want to change but I’m not sure how to deal and cope with those feelings and wounds from childhood. I struggle with actually trying a lot fear driven. Like I feel like I can’t understand life itself.

Thank you for sharing this! I especially appreciate the practical applications for work situations!

I ❤ your videos…I have felt so hopeless this year my 49th…I was derailed by family estrangement and hurtful unloving relationships and thank god I found your videos thank you KZfaq! As well ❤

Basically men are evil

I’m at the edge of this. But I’m doing the daily practice and hanging on to that last bit of hope.

I showed this to my partner and he used it against me, calling me “a difficult” person. He had no compassion about it, just judgment. 🤷‍♂️

I am the angriest person I have ever met

This video has hit very hard. Thank you so much ❤

I’ve been hearing for so long now and I know I’ll never really stop. I know there is a good man out there for me I just haven’t met him yet and I pray that when I do I’m able to feel and know it’s real, I’m a good woman and I know my worth. 💜

Called? Anna within Faith fellowship I keep hearing this term Called? Interesting thoughts enter my feelings towards unknown places for me to begin traveling? Over sharing can't believe life is accepting my Faith

Nah, he just sounds young and inexperienced.

NOPE. Phone addiction IS pathological. It's rude, at any rate. I wouldn't tolerate it.

Nailed it, thank you!

👏

I'm very glad you said this because I've seen people close to me get so much better but then get stuck on the final step: actually kicking away the scaffolding and training wheels and flying free into the wild and building a new life. I realize how hard this is because I have struggled with finally establishing a new identity that is not based on the past. Success, vision, and happiness are the ultimate goal and being stuck in the past keeps you existentially stunted. Embrace the choices and paths that are open to you now and remember (like Alan Watts said) your past is like the wake of a boat; it is what's left behind you and it DOES NOT control your choices or direction. You are in the driver's seat, not your past identity! Peace and well being to all❤

Narcissistic 'wives' look to their 'husbands' to fix all problems that they 'thiink' they can't (or don't want to) fix on their own, or with any involvement / input from themselves whatsoever. Good men are always helping their wives whenever they can, as they can be very good at doing this, and so get great satisfaaction from doing so. But, some types of problem, escpecially communication problems, seem / maybe are actually impossible to fix without good enough cooperation from the 'wife', so wherever she sees this request / demand for cooperation as unreasonable / or beyond her capacity to help without her suffering some kind of mental breakdown, she may start aggressively insisting that her 'husband' fixes her problems and/or his (all one's that she claims incessantly "she can't cope with") on his own, with the help of the little information she CAN share without having a mental breakdown, where some of what she CAN share then turns up in the form of non-verbal communication. even non-verbal comunication that's hard to read, or hard not to read incorrectly, or any information that, from her point of view, is needfully 'encrypted' (out of her awareness) -- hence a typical 'husband' complaint of being asked to mind read, although when some men get ever-better at mind-reading, then what they think they're then picking up typically gets aggressively denied (and then projected?), so this kind of problem is too tough for most people. My youngest son handles typical female insanity in his wife by calmly and assertively repeating "I don't negotiate with terrorists'", which he claims always works, but never results in a permanent fix - so WTF is going on here? I think that from now on, I'll try saying to my 'wife' that there's no quick fix to this kind of problem, or comunication problems, as these kinds of problem can only be fixed in a large number of small postive / constructive steps (maybe triggering little brief upsets that can be recovered from quickly and easily) over an hour, or day, or week, or month, etc., (with a sufficiency of breaks) and zillions of relationships all of our planet are struggling in the same way because one partner or the other insists on a quick fix, or otherwise a downing of tools, or a tantrum / hard for anyone to quell hissy-fit -- wish me luck -- or advise me otherwise !!

Well said. i attended some AL ANON meetings to gain some insight because of an Alcoholic family member. I was astounded at the pervasive feeling of victim mentality in the room. Nobody was allowed react or offer any insight to anyone's comments which felt like a conversational straight jacket. Several members had been attending for 12 years! Nobody seemed like they were making any progress, and were perhaps using the meetings as a platform to complain and maintain a victim identity. I'm certain AL ANON can be very helpful for many, but that was my experience of that particular place. Love your channel.

I really appreciate your content coz you’ve helped me understand how trauma has affected me a lot better than the therapist I’ve met

Thank you Anna this is incredibly helpful! 🙏🏽 it’s “funny” how much I can relate to what you said about that foggy concept and behaviour. And thank you for the examples of phrases of what to say to clarify situations. And yes sometimes truth kills the romance and that’s held me back from speaking my truth.

I suffered with it all my life and currently struggling with it too. It is so bad that I can't think of anything else. How to heal childhood wounds so that it goes away?

Lightbulb a-ha! Moment. I've been binging these videos for about 6 months and I felt really comfortable identifying as my trauma as each episode resonated deeply. The funny thing is I have had serious medical issues for decades and have never adopted those diagnosis as my identity. Why has it never occurred to me until hearing this episode that I'm not my cptsd either? This is big. Thank you Anna!

The other side of my story, you say. Let's see: I learned to be independent and think for myself. I am thrifty and know how to stretch a dollar. I am reliable. ... still learning how to have fun, though. ;)

Saving my life one video at a time 🙏🥰

How to be a doormat and treat those who treat you like crap nicely and with white gloves.

Nothing you suggest helps me. Now what? I've lost hope and I feel like I'm just waiting to die.

i'm glad i come across your channel, everything you said describe me exactly, my mom past away before i could walk and my dad was an alcoholic but he didn't leave us kids behind and brought us to the state, growing up was really hard i had no one to talk too i went througth drug and alcohol to cope and when i came out of my 30 years depression i realize my dad was the one that kill my mom and he past away in 2012, i'm 49 now and starting life over again, i really appreciate your video

I have tons of stuff - all stored away neatly - every wardrobe, cupboard etc is crammed full, my place does not look messy but I can’t throw stuff away- I just realized listening to this video how growing up poor has affected me - I think everything is precious and has to be kept !

Mr. Rodgers!!!! I LOVED HIM GROWING UP! WOW! It wasnt just me who was soooo blessed by his show and presence. Another show that calmed me down was Captain Kangaroo. He was so kind and sweet.

I'm a muslim and we do something called wodoo'a when you are feeling angry or upset, and it cools you off when you wash your face with water, my daughter has intense emotions and cannot stop when she is mad and I told her to always wash her face and sometimes we have this face mist to make her feel less tensed.

It only hurts for a little while... I'm 37 years old, and women don't stick around for more than 1 season.

This is exactly what I need!

Youre talking about my life

I’ve been messaging my boyfriend all afternoon and evening, his last message was at midday, now it’s midnight and he finally replied. I’ve gone straight to “he didn’t include me in his life today and he wasn’t in my life today” and I’ve been crying for the last half hour. I know this is STILL trauma from when my parents divorced and I suddenly went from being “daddy’s girl” to having a basically absent father. I reckon my crying tonight is really about the loss I felt when my parents split when I was 12 (I’m now 40).. my boyfriend has the right to be super busy, but my brain reacts to it as if it were a total loss of a person in my life. I wish i could not feel this bad, because I know he certainly doesn’t, he comes from a stable family background!

I shut down and almost panic when I’m being aggressively confronted. I feel like my eyes bug out, my heart starts racing, I can’t think straight at all. I need to figure out how to deal with my dorsal vagal freeze/submit/collapse reactions. And it seems like post-pandemic, psychos and ‘Karen’s’ are flipping out on people everywhere. How do you stay calm when somebody is screaming in your face?

Sometimes it's not anything that you do, it's just that people are used to coming to you to get their problems solved.

And what is CPTSD?

I have never had anyone understand, on the rare occasions when I tell someone. And most often, most men have their own trauma, usually theirs is a story of a girl that broke their heart years ago. ( nothing near what I we went through. ) I am so suprised to see that a minor heartbreak has made them so volatile and vulnerable and reactive. I have never disclosed the full story of what I went through. Just the mere mention that I went through something is enough to send everyone running. Pretty much, I will have to be alone forever. I have never found anyone who wants anything that is less than perfect. And even if I'm the most mild, perfect girl, they are still looking for someone better.😢

Never heard that term