I worked as a battery bull operator, changing the batteries of forklifts in a distribution centre. It wasn't a fun or a hard job, but if nobody did it, there would be a lot less food at the store.

From experience I can tell you that is a first-tier trinket to keep at the D&D table.

Prestidigitation all the way.

I watched my boss lose his mind at a Karen who (completely seriously) said "grocery clerk isn't a real job!" And while most of what he said back is too profane for KZfaq, the basic gist was "since you think grocery stores shouldn't exist, have fun getting your food somewhere the F else."

Really like how Emily knows exactly how to prompt Brennan to get the response they want.

If you think hogwarts is bad, wait til you find out about god.

i relate so much to ally going "this is the kind of energy that really gets me going as someone with adhd and failing grades"

It's not a career, it's a job. A job that's perfect for highschool and college students. Barista workers, baggers etc do not generate enough revenue to pay a salary that you can hang your hat on. Now, if you opened your own shop and worked as a barista there, that would probably generate enough revenue to call a career because you more than likely know the role well enough to be efficient, theres no training time, you ARE the manager, you do the books yourself, you perform so many roles that you save on labor costs and can pay yourself a healthy wage. But why would you sign up to be a doordash delivery driver when a delivery fee is 4 dollars, and you know they have to pay other fees like hosting, tech, support workers etc? not a very smart career to get into when the company doesnt charge people very much money. Youre depending on goodwill at that point. You can WANT to be something really bad. Maybe you can make it work by supplementing your income with another job that actually requires skill or has serious demand. You arent entitled to a healthy wage for jobs that have no barrier to entry with a large amount of open positions generating mediocre revenue per employee.

Brennan went full Donnie Thornberry!

Most people I talk to about politics seem to think this. They want good people to live in misery. It's depressing.

Using mage hand to turn off the light switch because I’m too lazy to get out of bed.

Sorry to be thirsty but "mommy? Sorry... Mommy?"

Just make a place to apparate just outside the grounds so its a walk or a bike ride away

Disgusting input from ally. But what do you expect

Forget spare the dying I’m not playing god… I’m taking prestidigitation so I don’t have to cook and clean anymore.

Matt's definitely bringing big Ganondorf energy with this one.

Ally talking about white people like she's not lmfao, God I h8 her

Any now that HP's writer has outted herself as a hateful crazy person, a lot of the thoughtless narrative choices make sense.

But did she?

Thats why scify and fantasy fans hate each other so much

Girlfriend: "Hi babe, I'm just watching Harry Potter" Guy: "No prob, i'll watch with you" ☝️🧐 *Proceeds to unintentionally annoy girlfriend by pointing out things that make no logical sense*

I wonder what the ministry of magic was doing between the years 1934-1945, particularly in Central Europe.

Oh, oh dang. That was brilliant. Truly a 10/10 no notes

If a job is worth having done, whether that’s having someone make your coffee or clean your house or provide medical care or providing financial services, then the person doing it deserves to be paid enough to live a good life; if a job isn’t worth paying a fair, living wage for, then it obviously doesn’t need to be done

Love potion + obliviate 😳 Tell me that wouldn't be a wide-spread nightmare...

Someone told me recently that they wanted to see me "rise up" from my job at a gas station because they see "a lot of potential" in me Sir if I didnt have this job and gas stations didn't exist you wouldn't be able drive your car so lets not lol

You can call anyone in the world with your phone, but you use it to write texts

Capitalism is the bad guy

Not having been there to witness the conversation, I'd imagine the argument is that working at a coffee shop should exist, but only as a simple job someone does while aspiring to achieve larger ambitions; it should be for a parent looking to stay busy or make some side income while the kid(s) are in school, highschool summer job to gain work experience and make money, or for someone in college who is getting a degree or even someone looking to become a manager at the coffee shop. However, it shouldn't be the goal of a person to serve coffee to patrons to solely support their whole home and family nor should it pay enough to.

Is like me with my FFXIV character, cute elegant outfits all day, while i dress like a bum

It's kinda sad that they don't actually understand the lore of Harry Potter,

Encouraging people to work careers as baristas probably isn’t the best move. Shows how out of touch these people are because they’ve never actually had to rely on those jobs to live and know they needed to do more with their life

A DMs job is to create a world and the characters within. A players job is to burn that shit to the ground 🤣

It's one thing to say _"That's not a career, it should be better but it's not."_ That's just being real. It's something else to say _"Yeah, it's bad, and it should stay that way."_

Awww they all look like babies

Ok hear me out....mage handjob

Campaign sorry

Which show is this?

i love the way Zac nods “mhmm” very understandinglye

The immensity of the power.

Which season is this from?

This is a great idea ... for a magic item. 🪻

They’re just like me frfr

A barista is basically a really fancy really low key drug dealer

In fairness, how was the warlock to know that going into a rage would break the hold they had over the barbarian?

That was definitely a Big Brain moment

With all due respect because it's not something you get to choose, she does not have the facial structure to rock the buzzcut look

Between this, and the adventuring party episode when Lou opened his soul to a grape jelly on a bacon egg and cheese and brennan just went on a whole stint of being surrounded by foodies, I am convinced Lou is one of those foodies

Mage hand would be a pianists worst nightmare

I honestly hate the Stun condition and make it a DM rule to never use it and replace it with the Dazed condition from the UA.