51:21 I'm 29 years old and ive never had meat sweats.

Poison lemonade!!!!!!!!

You are a god among men

That whole PSL hotline bit had big Mst3k energy.

coward for not titling the last one "fumanji jizz mist"

8:30 full circle moment, this cheez-it monstrosity has finally dropped nationally!

36:35 Love this line.

28:58 I've been searching for that Korn remix version of the intro for several hours. Thank you.

*PeniS Leash* hit me so hard i dissociated from laughter.

1:24:08 Futaland is the theme park I want to visit the least.

*CHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESE*

I fell asleep to this last night and had some WEIRD dreams. 😂

1:37:21 this is the Good News ive been trying to find.

We just need someone to make a donut cologne, then we'll get Stinkin' Dracula

*on the verge of tears* "i had to take the shot and i have to put you in the ground but this burger is flavorful and craveable"

Spooky Box is an all timer

Daddy the tiger.

"Krispy Kreme Classic -- that Classic *IS* spelled with a C"

The crowd that got two munch squads in one night are the luckiest people on the planet. The only munch squad I saw was in StL and they never released that live show. 😔

1:21:35 I can't believe KFC just called my Mom a size queen

When he heard Domino City I pictured Justin as Seto Kaiba or just lifting up his arm to show that he already has a duel disk

Shoutout to Chipotle Hayley

Remember. Heinz is stalking you. Always. They're liking posts you made six years ago at 3 AM. They're sending you a picture of your license plate going "just so u know ur tags expire in 3 weeks, get on that :) :) :)"

If someone is allowed to use your likeness -- even with the executor of your estate's permission, as they are not you, and cannot consent for you -- to create an AI ad as if you were doing things... we have lost all respect for our dead and all cemeteries should be emptied and turned into schools. And i don't hate this idea. But you can't have a society that both pays solemn respect to the departed... and has AI Bob Ross advertising for Mountain Dew: Do the Dead™

22:00 Republican or DOMICRAT Travis, it was RIGHT THERE

Damn, i hope Hailey's doing alright. By which i mean i hope she got fired and got a sweet job with the McElroys.

Put me on a bottle of Chick-Fil-A sauce that way they have to give me money and i can donate it to LGBTQ charities while telling people how bad the sauce tastes and how i have seen no proof there isn't the blood of children in it.

The underrated show Terminator: Sarah Connor Chronicles featured a Terminator who accidentally got sent back 100 years earlier than intended and became a business tycoon in an attempt to still accomplish his mission, 100 years later. I believe that Scott Getrich is such a terminator. Only a robot could write something so soulless. I also believe he must be like... a T-10 or some *real* early model to come up with that cover name. What's fascinating is... why did he need to release strange foods? Was he sent back to assassinate a novelty foods reviewer but accidentally killed the incredibly high person who was going to invent them, so had to do it himself to ensure the reviewer showed up to the exclusive premiere of not-pizza?

The Bob Ross one is so much worse after watching that documentary about how his image and brand was stolen from his family, so his family are no doubt upset they made a deep fake of his dad painting a soda that rarely escapes the states

You know that Jack lemon was meant to be jack o'lemon but an exec said that Jack o'lanterns are too scary or not Halloween enough or some other wildly out of touch thing

Travis has a future in Tony the Tiger impressions

I've listened to these dozens of times and it only just now occurred to me that it's insane that a Canadian pizza mogul would have a southern US accent 😂😂

There are Tim Hortons all over outside Canada though? I'm in the north of england and there are literally 3 or 4 of them within 30 minutes of me. The list on wikipedia lists basically anywhere he'd be likely to be touring: Andorra, Bahrain, Canada, China, Egypt, India, Kuwait, Mexico, Oman, Pakistan, Philippines, Qatar, Saudi, Arabia, Singapore, South Korea, Spain, Thailand, United Arab Emirates, United Kingdom, United States He was either lamenting not being able to go to Tim Hortons while on tour a long-ass time ago or he's really going to the middle of nowhere on his tours.

Dibs on 'shortcut to vehicular manslaughter' for an album name.

They were rioters. If you're calling them terrorists then you're calling the participants in any riot that has ever broken out, regardless of ideology, a terrorist too. So everyone who took an active role in the LA riots, any BLM protest that turned into a riot, the people in the 2011 London riots, and everyone in the 1999 Carnival against capitalism riot or any other riot ever are terrorists too. You can't just decide people are terrorists because they aren't on the same side of politics as you. I'm not on their side either but words have meanings for a reason and labelling rioters terrorists just because they aren't on the same side as you is a slippery slope that ends in fascism and authoritarianism. By your same logic its easy to brand anyone who stands up against rampant capitalism or unjust government a terrorist. This is exactly the same thinking that puts fascist dictators into power and is the same thing that allows them to control politics and quell dissent. The definition of terrorism is 'the unlawful use of violence and intimidation, especially against civilians, in the pursuit of political aims' which can easily be used to brand literally any rioters terrorists, but there is an important distinction. Failing to make that distinction properly is a dangerous thing to do.

Okay, fish absolutely is a scientific classification, but shrimps is not fish, shrimps is bugs.

1:08:53 knowing the furry fandom, i can think about where Tony's exuding frosting from, and it ain't his pores

I'd imagine being killed by a guy named The Riddler would be like being killed by a guy named Jigsaw, or being killed by something called a Bouncing Betty or a Fat Man. Without context, anything sounds dumb as hell - imagine being a mob boss and getting taken down by a dude in a sweaty bat outfit, or being killed by the dude who's literally a clown. Imagine being the incarnation of a deity with an entire planet devoted to you and being stopped by a rich guy in a pointy-eared rubber suit

I think i missed the episode that contained that Zaxby's segment, and I'm fucking convinced that Griffin wrote that song. Edit: Yeah, I have no idea about, or memory of that buffalo thing

Okay, look, breakfast burritos are fully a respectable thing. But breakfast *tacos... are* also a thing. And that thing is $1 or less greasy-ass tacos that have been sitting out since 2-4 AM when you went and got them, eaten *late* the next morning, hungover, it's fine the grease in the tacos and the alcohol in your stomach will kill any bacteria and also you may well vomit them up anyway except you're 22 so you're probably good actually.

"The fuggin' president of ice cream" is a very funny phrase with Republicans seizing this not-even-an-opportunity-just-a-thing-they-desperately-frantically-manufactured to make fun of Biden for liking ice cream like he was wearing some kind of tan suit or using dijon mustard. Like they were some kind of gestalt Richard Hammond saying eating ice cream is gay.

travis and justin's brief but snooty back and forth about their mics being off is really good

thanks for this journey brother

So i read Avenged Sevenfold's band info on Spotify and it was the dumbest, most artificial, most pretentious PR copy i could imagine... but it reminded me that the PR copy from these fast food people desperately trying to hype up their new gimmicks was a *close* second.

Bless you for these

#53 with trav’s “oooooo” joke, I think about it all the time. The way Justin immediately starts laughing but in a betrayed way, “I can’t believe we share genetic material “ is such a banger line

Bro we need to talk about the Zaxby's buffalo wing song. Can we talk about this please

I'm pretty sure Chuck E. Cheese's target audience for those songs haven't developed the fine motor skills needed for crocheting.