Hi! I’m only a few minutes in and have advice: Read educated and the Glass Castle, then write your memoir.

I feel badly for this girl. Not that any day is a good day to commit suicide, but it just had to be on her birthday. I know a lot of narcissistic parents who wouldn't even do this to their children. Suicide is selfish, but it's even more selfish on a child's birthday. To me, its almost unforgivable.

Your trying to get over it and that is NOT healing. When you process the trauma you can heal.

No one has the right to judge you. I watched your video about your mom. I don't think you said 1 negative thing. I have always wanted children. It took us many years and 3 miscarriages to finally have them. I have 3. My youngest is now 20. You do not have to explain to anyone why you don't want them. I think you are being very responsible by not having them.

❤

Im so happy for u

We hear you. The best thing for you to do is forgive her. We don't forgive so that person can feel absolved of their hurt against us. We forgive so we don't continue to burden our own souls and minds. Hang in there!

I'm so sorry for your loss. I spent years in severe depression. I had a complete psychotic break. Thank Jesus I found hope again in him. One thing I learned is Suicide doesn't end pain, it just transfers it to the ones you love.

My second Daughter (17) had a baby on the 1st March.. and my first daughter (25) took her own life 6 days later… she was coming to meet the baby that day. She was so excited to be an aunt.. she completely destroyed us that day… then my 3rd daughter (8) assaulted by a neighbour 2 weeks later. My 3 sons and I struggle so bad.. I’m the mother, I’m the one who holds it together… it’s all I’ve done for the last four years… pulling my family back together. Suicide is a mental health thing… but man, it’s so selfish… I get angry with my daughter some days… if you’re reading this and thinking suicide is a way out.. it’s not, it’s selfish and horrible.

🙏💕peace.

People put this kind of stuff on here because they want their pain struggles joys to be seen and heard. ❤ whoever is reading this please know that you are NOT your past, your life circumstances, you are not your thoughts or feelings or your income or your possessions, you are also not your roles ( like mother, friend, siblings or wife, teacher, driver etc...) You are not not your body. You are the eternal awareness behind all thise things. You are part of everything and everyone 😊 We are one...the same way your heart is one with your mind, your stomach, your arms legs cells veins Arteries, we are one big body ❤

What a brave young lady! My thoughts are with you x

I don't know if you still post I just had to reach out. I'm 21 years older than you and in all my years I've never met anyone who can relate. Our stories are different. When I watched this video I didn't expect it to impact me. My birth mother is still alive and I have limited contact. It's a long story. But where your story literally made me yell for my husband to come listen was when you shared how your birth mother's friends were misled by her to believe you had a relationship. The first time I met my birth mother at 25 years old, she first asked me to pretend as if she had raised me and that I left home after she had to put me in a home for troubled kids. It was an experience that I felt very alone in but then hearing your story just made me feel seen...even if just for a minute. Thank you for sharing. I think I'm ready to tell my story now.

It sounds like you have learned so much from your experiences and are dealing with them. It’s never easy but there is so much more to you than the things that have happened to you. I watched your entire video and know your talking about it helps you and others. Prayers that each day gets brighter.

Makes sense to me why your reluctant to havr kids. Girl as a baby you were left alone they always say you revert back to the age you were first abused esp. severly like you were. Do you I'm here for you. Glad you have your husband.

Do you bc you only know what is best for you. I pray you still have a good relstionship w/ your dad. Thank God he intervined. Soul search it does wonders bc only you can answer why you are who you have become.

Your story is so sad. Touched my heart. I grew up in a childrens home. At 12 years old I moved to Colorado Springs with a foster partent who tried to adopt me but my mom never wanted to sign any papers. I learned at 23 yrs my sisters contacted me & wanted me to move back home. Which also was Alaska. You see I had 9 brothers and sister 2 sister I knew but was a stranged from. So I moved back with my 1 & half son. It was nice to meet my family. I have since then remarried had another son and the 2 sisters I knew have died. All my boys 3, 1 being a step. Are all grown and I have lost touch with most of my family still living. Its hard to maintain a relationship with those you barely know.

❤ I hope you are doing good now! Thank you for letting me listen to your story. I wish i could go back in time to get you out of that situation of being alone for so many days... You are a survivor ❤

I just can't handle the confusion.... I get told i look very young too... It makes me sad... Realize how long i will have to endure this confusion and pain and bewilderment

Not sure if you’ll ever see this but PLEASE look into attachment style. It helped me so so much. It wasn’t your fault.

Talk about childhood trauma 😂

You are a lovely young lady.Best of luck😊

I'm mad when you said its creepy when she look at you from far away,and then i forgot you see her as stranger while from her perspective its her daughter.

I had one live birth and 6 miscarriages, miscarriages the further along hurt worse obviously, I’ve only had one at 10 weeks but it was exactly the same as contractions when I was giving birth to my son, my early miscarriages 5-6 weeks the rest were, I had cramps as you would a period!

U know... u kinda remind me of rachel from life is strange : before the storm ❤

You are an exceptional human to have such a remarkable way of telling your life (so far) story without blame and with as much compassion for your birth mother. Honestly, so many people would be stuck in rage and addiction from this whole experience. I didn’t struggle with my childhood very much until I had my own kids. It was looking at their perfect little beautiful selves and it started making me despise my mother for how she let me be treated. It’s all just so much and I can’t think of anyone at your age who can see things so clearly. I’m just so impressed by you and your parents. You’ve done so well. ❤❤

I’m 51 and have been told I should write a book about the things I’ve gone through. I said who’s going to read that?!” Yet I’ve watched 3 of your videos and now I’m thinking since people don’t read as much anymore, maybe I should try and do a KZfaq channel and share my story. What do I have to lose 🤷🏼‍♀️⁉️

I’m so sorry for all that you had to endure, as a child of sexual abuse and who was also put out to prostitute for “the monster” aka my bio dad I can tell you some things in life are much harder to learn to forgive than others. I know the Bible tells me I’m to forgive him in order for Christ Jesus to forgive me of my sins but it wasn’t until after he was found dead on the outside basketball court in his wheelchair that I found peace and felt safe from him. You see not even those bars helped me feel safe but once he was gone for good I regretted it because I let him keep that power over me. Please please please don’t let anyone keep you in bondage by keeping you locked in a mental cage from past trauma. Show them the same grace you’d want Jesus Christ to show you 🙏🏼💜🙏🏼

Very smart kids. Lol. When i was a kid id ask people in parking lots for bus money and would buy candy or donuts or other treats. I think we all do some crazy things as kids. Lol

Im glad to see your doing well. Grace us with another video soon please

You are so brave and strong for the willingness to share this with strangers online. I lost my best friend to suicide just after Hight school. I also lost my mom a few years ago. Stay strong and know you did the beat you could and so did your mom. We are all broken in some way. I pray your doing well in life considering what you have been through

Jenna…certainly wasn’t your fault. Your Mom had a lot of problems. It’s ok to talk and it’s healthy. I grew up with a Mom with a lot of problems…and because of how I was raised I have a lot of problems also. I’m old now but for too many years I struggled alone with them. The best thing I ever did was go to therapy. I should’ve gone in my 20’s. You don’t just get over these things but there are things you can do to free your mind from thinking about them all the time. The sooner you start the better. It may take a few tries to find a good fit in a therapist, but believe me it can save you from living in confusion and trauma. And from making mistakes. Best wishes sweetie and be smart with your life you only get one. Don’t let your start in life drag you down, find someone to help you get free and live a wonderful life! If insurance or money is a problem, social services often have reasonable rates that match your income!

Don’t let those comments from those few people on the Internet get to you. All you have to say to yourself when you get something like that is considered the source. You’re a young, beautiful, mature woman you’re entitled to speak your mind and like you said you did not say anything negative about mom. You just mentioned your experiences and you have every right to have closed the door , listening to your moms and raving because she was just trying to reel you back and to you manipulate you and CU you did very well. You did good for yourself. You stood up for yourself and you have parents that love you and support you and all your decisions that you made regarding mom. I just came across your channel today and I’m just amazed. What a wonderful amazing woman you are. I’m not gonna judge your mom because she was going through her own personal demons and things and she dealt with them the best way she felt that she could I’m sure she loved you her own way and her own capacity. You just keep doing the great work that you’re doing and enjoy your young married life and grow old with your husband together and just be happy and just know that a lot of people care about you.❤❤

You’re doing a great job!! don’t ever doubt yourself on anything!! do you have a husband that loves you and a God that loves you even more!!❤🙏

Jenna, your vlog just came across my feed. It is so heart warming to see all the support that has come your way through the comments. I hope you’re doing well. The last day that I saw my mother was Mother’s Day and I’m sure she picked that day. I loved her, but she was a difficult mother and she had a very difficult unloving mother, my Grandma. So be well & sending hugs 🤗

One day y’all will be ready ❤it’s so sad this life Yet within the tears are still the imagination. Paint yourselves a buetiful shoreline where we’ll all meet again one day. Well build a fire and tell ancestral tales as far back and continuing to infinity!

Sounds a lot like my story cept Jan 27 and I was born on my grandparents wedding anniversary and I think mom sometimes wished she’d never been born so…. But she died vomiting blood in my hands on my brothers wedding anniversary from liver disease (years of severe alcoholism)

I just want to say that my heart hurts for you because i can feel your hurt, i have been no contact with my bio mom for 10+ years and have no regrets. Your mom is selfish for committing suicide on your birthday of all days like lets ruin your one day on earth thats yours with her needs/wants like she has your entire life. She didn't deserve you and you deserve so much better!!! I hope your heart heals ❤

It is truly painful for me to watch this, because I have experienced almost the exact same story as you and it is a lil bit shocking to see someone else tell a story so close to my own. The only major differences being me having been eventually close with my mother and even living with her for a summer before she relapsed and ended her own life, I mean I even was born addicted to vikaden too like, what??? Uhm,, but yeah I just wanted to say that I makes me smile to see someone who has been through similar struggles but are doing well now as an adult and aren’t down a similar path. It gives me hope for my own future a bit really ! I have recently turned 18, and I have been very nervous abt my own adulthood and I just hope u know that you have helped me feel understood and stuff! I’m sorry for what you’ve experienced, you are so loved and appreciated 🫶✨

First stop UPTALKING and vocal fryzzz. Form a sentence with out an upward inflection at the end. I appreciate you don’t say “like” every two words though.

Never feel like you need to forgive in order to move forward...but obviously you already know that. Just found your channel and I'm looking forward to watching more!

Hey. Your story helped me a lot to see that I'm not alone. My story is a lil bit different. My parents abandoned me when I was baby...

Too late, but I wish you found it in your heart to try to get to know her. You were young, hope you get healed in Jesus Christ name.

My sister committed suicide last year. This year I'm about to have a baby very close to the same exact day. So I have very mixed feelings about everything and it makes it very difficult to be happy during this time as it's only the very first year since her passing and I also got pregnant only a few months after the most traumatic event of my life. Making enjoying my pregnancy very difficult, as I have struggled a lot with my mental health.....

I know it’s been 4y since you posted this but I felt the need to reach out to you. I hope you are well and happy and have found some sort of peace in your life concerning your Mother. I think that your Mother and my Sister are very similar. They love you in a way that is hurtful to you and don’t understand why. I haven’t spoken to my Sister in 11 years and I have just decided that all I can do is forgive her and love her from a distance. I’m truly sorry she tried to get a reaction from you by killing herself on your Birthday. I feel these sort of people feel rejected but don’t realize they do a lot of rejecting themselves. I’m 56 yo and have seen a psychiatrist and counselor over this but it boils down to them self medicating their personality disorder(s) and making poor choices. My Sister also did these things to her 4 children and my parents before they passed. You are not alone. I just hope you are in a better place. I will keep you in my prayers 🙏🏼 and hope you vlog again. I would love to know how you are doing ❤

I think you are right

I hope your mom is resting in heaven. But wow that’s selfish. She couldn’t wait a day. But I am at the beginning of the video.

Could it simply be because she had gotten clean?? Many ppl can’t shake their addictions the way you did.. Which.. btw Praise GOD YOU were able to stop/QUIT and lose your addictions.!! If I were in your shoes, I would believe in my heart she had finally gotten clean and come to the realization of what she truly lost. Obviously, she watched you, somewhat a far. Re:; Facebook, Etc. She was probably mourning the fact that she wasn’t the Moma she wanted to be. it was of those addictions that stole her from you… sadly and unfortunately.. maybe we all could take a moment of our day and pray for all those that are addicted. May your Moma RIP Much Love young lady… From one mother to another I’ve WATCHED BROKEN-HEARTED addiction in my family… It Robs EVERYONE of much!!! 💯 FACTS

Hi Jenna, First I want to inform you that if you want a belly button they can create one. So I am a Scrub nurse & specialize in cardio/thoracic surgery. But when there are no heart or lung cases I scrub & assist in bariatric surgery. Weight loss surgery. So usually after 1-2 years after the patient loses so much weight the skin on their abdomen just hangs down. Sometimes so bad that they have to talk the skin into their pants. So they come back for reconstructive surgery. During this process, we have to cut all the excess skin off. So most of the time the belly button has to go. So we just create one. Just like the breast when a woman has reconstructive breast surgery the areola (nipple)Has to be realigned or in some cases there's cancer cancer in the areola (nipple) & we just create a new nipple and sometimes we have to tattoo the areola so it's the same color as it was before. I was one without a belly button as well. I also was premature three months early and weighed 1 1/2 pounds. I received my belly button when I became an operating room nurse, and seeing what they could do, I was amazed. So I asked the surgeon to put a belly button on me and he did.

I would keep listening to your story but your cus words are not something I care to hear