When a guy says he's not looking for a relationship run 🏃 and don't look back lol because they are 💯 telling you the truth regardless how strong the connection just walk away and save yourself time.

Let go of outcome/intention/fantasy from beginning and see the reality. Have strong boundaries and self esteem.

1. Keep the 80% attention to yourself and 20% to the other person 2. Drop the fantasy (see it is for what it is) 3. Using vulnerability as a filter 4. Frustration object relation (there’s a frustration quality in your life, there’s a longing and desire to want something and not getting it) 5. Watch out for emotionally available unavailable guy

Pure genius ......we often idolize relationships and ignore red flags.....love yourself enough to walk away, apply all that love towards you and your well being. Put yourself 1st ❤️

I was skeptical when I clicked on here... BUT It’s eerily spooky how each point is so precisely what has saved me from marrying the wrong guy in 3 separate instances. Single folks get labeled as being non experienced at relationships but we don’t get credit from allllll the things some of us have avoided by staying true/in tune with SELF

Single women live longer than married women. Happily married men live longer than single men. Please don’t be quick to leap in ladies😀

Drop the fantasy. I’m so guilty of this in the past and I hate it when I do it! Let life prove that he’s your soulmate. Great advice!

1- put 80% attention to yourself (connect with your own intuition) 2- slow down the relationship 3- use vulnerability as a filter 4- frustration to get what you need from him

This is bomb content. Ladies need to listen to this guy.

#5 was an eye-opener! I've been with the "emotionally available unavailable" guy and was so confused b/c I didn't know this "hybrid" existed. I'm convinced that the best protection or defense against insincere, unavailable men is SELF-LOVE...and to always put my self-worth and well-being above my desire to have a man in my life.

Men make relationships difficult...honestly you don't know how difficult it is to find a good one

Women are NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR ANYBODY'S HAPPINESS!!👍. Take NOTE! 👍

You’re a genius. I’m a Primary Care Physician and you have given everyone free therapy which would normally cost thousands of dollars. No medication can replace your kind, superbly intelligent guidance. Thank you

Too many narcs out there. They would not like your percentages. I'll wait for the right one. I've dated all kinds. i am in my 70s now. Guess I'll die being a happy single.

“Use vulnerability as a filter.” Best advice ever!! I’ve had several men let me down as soon as I showed any vulnerability. Unfortunately, this happened after dating a long time. I was even engaged to one of them. I’m going to use this from here on out. Thank you, Jack!

Omg! Drop the fantasy. I didn't know I did that. You are right, i tend to get stuck on the daydream of fantasy..Thank you

"When the student is ready, the teacher will appear" 😊 Thank you so much for teaching us. I'm learning

Just discovered your videos. ‘Emotionally available unavailable men’ ........wow....... I almost passed this by this morning. I came upon you by accident. When the student is ready, the teacher will appear. Thank you, Jack! I’m a fan.

"Frustration object relation"! I've never heard this before, but it seems to be the story of ALL areas of my life! Thanks for the insight!!

The key is being vulnerable. That’s the secret. See how he will react when you let your guard down. Trust me, you will see. If he stays and wants to help, he’s the one for you.

Yes, and this type of guy is devastating to be with because in the end, he walks out, ghosts you. But I did see some of the signs very early on but I was too overwhelmed by my feelings for him that I couldn't extract myself in time. VERY, VERY PAINFUL! Once he moved back to his country, he let slip some shady things that he was involved in but I couldn't, and I am still struggling to REALLY let him go but I know that I MUST!

#3- omg 😮 His dog 🐕 scratched my arm I was bleeding pretty badly He showed no emotion - empathy I asked for a bandaid & he said- nah Suggested I just rinse it off with water That showed me enough to stick him into bye 👋 bye 👋 zone - lol 😂 Actually there was a couple other red flags already - then this lack of empathy or care was it- for me. Bye 👋

You are good (comment worthy good 😄). Normally, watching these types of videos will reinforce the painful emotion that makes you click on it in the first place; but I literally FELT BETTER afterwards (this is the second video of yours that I’ve watched). You are informative, compassionate and progressive. You give medicine that may be hard to swallow, but actually does it job and soothes and heals in the end. Thank you so much for your offering. God Bless You.

Omg... yes!! I am in the early stages of #5!!! This makes so much sense. He says he wants a relationship but makes time for everything else, friends and family but me. When I ask about it, be vulnerable, I get told I am bringing him drama and overthinking. NO- he is not available and does not want to be questioned or take accountability for his actions! Agh!!! Three months down the drain. Thank you for making this so I can see NOW that this was going nowhere.

I’m literally crying right now it resonated with me so much

I think the last one is the best, IMO. That’s where I’m at after experiencing all the rest. Next is to start meeting men that connect AND are completely available.

Thanks for the video, it helped me to move away from this emotionaly unemotional unavailable man. It was so confusing and frustating with him. Noone can help him unless he wants to help him. Finally relieved.

Sometimes I feel shame about the fact I have not had a real loving relationship yet. :( I have attracted these types and it seems I used to be attracted to these types. I need to change and learn. I am doing self parenting and plugging into my intuition. It’s been a very spiritual awakening and makes me very emotional every day since I’ve started an inner self love journey. Everything you say is SO CORRECT. I DO fantasize about who they are! I didn’t even realize I was doing it!

#5 Bingo! I never heard of this description exactly said like this before and it is soooo spot on. Thank you for this clarity.

I love the 80/20 idea. It has really helped me to listen to my intuition more. These are fantastic Jack! Thank you for this video. 😊

You name the damaged man I've met them, it's really tiring to be honest. It does not take me long to see who they are and I walk away, I'm not looking for a fixer upper I'm looking for a partner.

Jack brilliant. I really appreciated your sensitivity and care while expressing these truths. I did not get triggered. You did not blame. I really really thank you for conmunicating in a way that created a safe space so that i could listen and learn. Im pretty sure thats why everyone is responding the same. 🎗🏆🎖

If he's turned on by you being nasty and cold, and relentlessly chasing you when you're showing little to zero interest... More than likely, he won't return positive and mutual affection. Some of these guys are so persistent they wear you down and when you actually feel genuine attraction, they totally backpedal and act as though you're crazy for misinterpreting their pursuits. When you're good and Confused, they'll call any of your reactions... Too emotional. Red flag, run. Subliminally , you knew who he was a a coward in the first place, trust your first instincts. It will not change. I personally was a severely emotionally neglected and unwanted child. Giving and receiving love is foreign to me, but thankfully my children seem to be emotionally well looking at their own relationships. But this is a dead giveaway to attracting emotionally abusive or unavailable men.

THIS IS SOO GOOD! Even when you are dating, you have to put yourself first. If all your energy goes into keeping the other person happy then your relationship is unbalanced and an emotional drain. THANK YOU FOR SHARING!

Definitely have had plenty of time to get to know myself, vulnerabilities, and even face unrealistic ideals and fantasies about a person. I’ve also made a conscious effort stop attracting and or accepting emotionally unavailable men. Perhaps, now I just need to release ‘fear’ that there is a man out for me who’ s emotionally available. I suppose at this point it’s a matter of loving and respecting myself , waiting for the right guy, and being ok with myself in the process.....great video☺️

Btw I can not believe it is 2019 and we are in need of videos like this or... How to know if he likes you... What is he thinking when ignoring you or 5 steps to get him to call you.... Its just insane. My mom and dad got toghether when my dad saw my mum, thought to himself 'i like her'.. Asked her out and it was as simple as that.... Jesus....

This is amazing! Thank you! All on point! 🙏 Just as an aside, especially with regards to point 3, one must be careful of Sociopaths. Speaking for myself, they are the most seemingly emotionally available and empathetic people, but then later down the line cause major distruction due to all the mirroring, lies, and manipulation. A good question to ask someone of this nature is 'what are you currently doing to improve or work on yourself?' An inability to answer this question properly, will show the inability to see any limitation in oneself. Also good to look at whether they have been able to maintain friendships over a long period of time. Sociopathic people tend to reel you in, and spit you out. Therefore they will have little to no long term friends. I totally agree with slowing things down. Best to get to know someone on a friendship level first, as endorphins, and Dopamine can make the intuition fuzzy. Love the 80/20% idea. Gonna do that! 🙂

I'm actually doing 100% on myself at the moment ... we're not together at the moment and I raised my game massively and said he can join me there, or just not contact me again. I like that we're in your lounge, Jack. It's good. Great video.

A caveat for your point about women showing vulnerability: sometimes guys pretend to be sensitive towards you at the ‘getting to know’ stage, only ato use this against you later. This is my experience with narcissistic men. The eyes and the smile have it (the genuineness), but if the getting to know is mainly via email etc, these cues are not picked up. Expression and body language say a lot.

One of the best videos on this topic I've heard.. . On point and resonated completely. Thank you!

Jack, thank you so much for sharing. This hits home for me and is powerful and profound. I needed to hear this and I will put your wisdom to use!

You just hit my recent situation on the head with your point #5. I had already figured it out but your "what to watch for" will doubtless help many women who, like me, knew something was off, but didn't understand exactly what was happening until I was emotionally in the hurt zone. I've been doing the work, and your explanations are great.

I’m so glad you mentioned #5 ! A lightbulb went off when when you talked about it, now it makes sense what I’ve been dealing with in my relationships. My intuition will tell me the man is not right for me , but yet it doesn’t make sense because sometimes he seems available . And so I walk away from the relationship feeling hurt and deeply confused and wondering if I’m being too judgmental. And also your point #4 really spoke to me, and really thinking about it I can see that since a child with my relationship with my father and siblings and how it’s affected me. I think My core belief is that a man will eventually not be emotionally available to me, and that it’s just the way things are. Omg 😮 I never thought of it that way, that I could possibly be playing a part in being drawn to emotionally unavailable man. Thinking back, I am pretty sure I’ve approached men who are emotionally available, and it scares me because I worry they will smother me or are only with me because they want something from me or eventually treat me bad or think I’m gullible and fall for it. I want a committed relationship but yet the right one seems so out reach. Thank you Jack for your insightful videos and compassion and the space for letting me talk ❤️. I want to do inner work and your videos have given me a little more specifics on what needs more work.

Oh my gosh... the “frustrations in life” and “emotionally available unavailable man” and segments just knocked my socks off..!! So on point 😳 I’ve been connecting with an EAUM over the last few weeks... damn are they a confusing breed! It was one of your breadcrumbing videos that really opened my eyes last night, and now you’ve nailed it once again lolz Bravo, Jack 👏😎

This is the first time ever I actually feel this is great advice when it comes to relationships. Thank you for giving advice from the heart instead of copying the bs ❤

Very unusual and precise insights in this video, thank you, im subscribing !

Thank you for the last part about the Emotionally Available Unavailable for Relationship Guy. The struggle is real lol and all because we are not taught these concepts growing up 🤦🏻‍♀️

My biggest challenge is being objective and focusing on the now. I am always looking at potential, future, hopes and dreams. Thanks for sharing these ideas! Extremely helpful! Enlightening and useful!

you rock jack! love the last one! biggup!👊🏼

Absolutely fantastic advice and so so timely as I’ve just finished with a chap who didn’t want me but kept seeing me.... sad this weekend but proud of myself ❤️

OMG .. i keep rewatch this over and over again.i really need so much to hear this .i have been looking for this content in youtube but i never see this accurate .. really appreciated yr work jack.. thank you so much .

EXCELLENT content! Thank you Jack for being vulnerable enough to recognize yourself on point no. 5. I actually had a huge realization myself. It's not only certain men that are emotionally unavailable. I realized that when men show their vulnerable side I've been the one to run and hide. So thank you so much for that!!!

This is such great advice, I've had two failed long term relationships, and I totally agree with all your points, just wished I'd behaved like this earlier! X

Thank you Jack! Just found you tonight! I was just wondering about a guy who i dated many years ago who i see when i go out dancing. We have mutual friends together. He fits the guy you talk about in #5. So cool~ I have been on a self awareness and healing journey for awhile now. Healing from a convert narc relationship which turned me to go inward and get help. I am doing major work on my inner child and her wanting!!! Since this deep inner work my eyes have been open to family members and past relationships and friends. My mind and body are changing as i learn how to feel what is happening inside me and choosing to put me first. I am learning so much! I hope to teach and help others in the future~

Loving it! Very, very insightful!! Especially the frustration object bit! Spot on!

The last type described was actually really accurate and not easy to find that profile in any other video. It would be great to deep dive more. Well done!

This video changed my life. I was primed for this video. Your bonus tip really hit home. Thank you!

Wow!!! The bonus.... the emotionally available unavailable man... I really needed to hear that, I'm struggling letting go of a man like that, it just always feels like he's soo in tune to me, but everything else is, well pretty much crap, breadcrumbing me, only calls late at nighr, etc. Thank you Jack

Soooooo spot on. Thank you for confirming what I was already in tune with but needed that little nudge to confirm im pointed in a healthier direction . .... and I just need to start walking that way.

I think you are a fabulous guy. You give really sound, gentle, reasonable, uplifting and empowering advice. You don’t bring women down or make them feel bad about their situations. Your clarity and level- headed nature is so helpful. Thank you for helping so many people!! 🙏

Wow, your perspective is so accurate, insightful and different than others (relationship experts) preaching on youtube!

Wow....this really helped me. So many insights that I’ve never thought about. Very valuable information. Thank you!

Hi Jack, I was led into this video from your narcissist video released yesterday. I recently released a relationship that I saw I was invested but he wasn't. It took me till today to realize exactly didn't happen. I walked away without tears (the earth shattering tears). Thank you for the validation.

This is so important! Thank you for sharing this amazing video. 🙏 I had to learn it the hard way, so I hope everyone takes notes. Much love ❤

I'm on tip #3 and I'm already feeling like I should be taking notes, and expounding. This is good info!

What a great video! I had to learn all of this the hard way but hearing it from you means I'm on the right track. I just subscribed.

Amen! 🙏 Best advise about emotionally unavailable men that I came across so far! This is such a good advise, thank you so much for the content!

Powerful message. Thank you 😊

Extremely helpful. Thank you. Happiness is felt when expectations meet reality .... 😄👍❤️

Excellent lesson on this subject. When I’m obsessing, fretting, and pining I’m not being emotionally present at all with my own self. It’s a very deep form of self neglect when I think of it. Staying present with oneself in order to be fully present with another is one of the keys to all of this! I will be listening over and over to this talk and take notes until it really sinks in. My parents where 100 percent emotionally unavailable. Now I need a sort of scaffolding into emotionally available domains. I’m so hungry for it that I rush so fast into it but then I get overwhelmed to the point of feeling engulfed and claustrophobic that I have to leave. The pain of the loss isn’t as bad as the pain of the feeling of being emotionally crowded. That symbiotic thing without any real breaks to self regulate scares me to no end.

Yesss thank you so much Jack! This is some very valuable ways/steps forward. Cheers to filling our cups & living in our own greatnesses with each other 🥂

#5 was huge!!! I’m experiencing this right now, nice to have a name for it.

Three minutes in, subscribed!! 🔥 Love, love, love!!!! #loveyoufirst #bereal #behuman

Such excellent offering of knowledge. Thankyou so much for sharing these wonderful and potent, clear insights!!!

Jack, this is gold! All points are so eloquently and clearly expressed. Nailed them all. So helpful.

Brilliant! Possibly beyond brilliant...because 100% spot-on yet first I'm hearing! That's hard to do. Hats off to you! Thank you!

That was very interesting information, I really need to apply all five concepts to myself especially the 80/20. All I ever do is give my all, and get absolutely nothing but disappointment, hurt and used in the end.. Thank you so much.

I only subscribed at the end because I was so taken from the beginning. This guy is so on point! So insightful. Thank you for taking time out of your life to create this content for us. You really put me on with this message, thank you so much!!!

*Would love to hear more in depth on object relations. Really been enjoying the content. Subbed a while back. Keep it coming! - Leslie* 😊

Thank you, I really needed that tonight! 👍 It's like KZfaq read my mind 😂

Wow, very on point. I found out these "patterns" myself allready. Now trying to resolve them..which seems harder to me.. :D Thank you very much for your empathic way, much love!

Hi Jack How refreshing to disclose parts of your developing character with us all! Your video is insightful and very helpful to me. I am breaking very old patterns and ready to learn. Thank you.

This advice is absolutely amazing!! I found myself doing this going towards the end of 2021 with certain friendships. I started LISTENING to my intuition when it would tell me that someone wasn't genuine with me and redirected my focus on bettering myself so much to the point that now I don't even miss those fabricated friendships. I'll be sure to apply this formula to every area of my life from here on out. Great video! 👍🏽

Thanks Jack, you are so spot on, I am so out of tune with myself, I know it and am now working on it. Thank you for the apologies, you're so sweet. 😊😍😙. It's the apologies I feel I needed.

Wow so much good information I actually sat down and took notes to be real! Exactly what I needed to hear and know, definitely will share and pass along!

Thanks for the video! It means a lot to me as I am now at the point getting over the “emotionally available” unavailable guy in my life. It’s really really tough

I'm so thankful you are posting these videos

Wowwwwww! This is indeed "unusual" tips! Thanks jack your videos are making me grow in self love, acceptance, respect for myself and deeper connection with myself. I feel alot more confident and defined about what I want, and what I should seek, without compromising my own happiness anymore ! Thank you so much.. But why didn't you start a channel earlier before now??!.. But You know what? It's not too late, i'm so glad you started a channel, more importantly I found you! ... Frankly, there's a strong connection between your style of delivery and content with that of Helena. Though your content differs for sure in a certain way, I feel a synergy, and hearing from the male perspective gives evidential proof Helena definitely knows what she's always been talking about. .. With you both, I definitely have grasped my true Feminine Energy, I feel a networking of self inside of me, and I'm a part of me now!!! Feels so good! :) 💞

YOU HAVE SPOKEN TO ME TODAY AND I THANK YOU SOOOO MUCH FOR THIS GOOD WORD!! MUAH!!

There's alot of take aways I am getting from you/this recording! Thank you so much. I appreciate you reaching me!!!

Wow. This is fantastic advice. And, I realized that ‘I ‘ am the emotionally available/ unavailable one. Really glad I stumbled across this video. Will be looking at your other ones and definitely looking up Frustration Object Relation. A lot packed into this video. Thanks!

Welp, looks like I’m going to be single forever.

Love it Jack, I resonate deeply and feel like you have given me the missing jigsaw piece. I also appreciate your own candid vulnerability thank you so much.

Point 4 is shockingly true! It's the story of my life! I never seem to be able to get what I would really love. It would be good if you could do a video where you talk more in depth about this issue and perhaps give some advice on how to overcome it.

You are sooo right. And them are the guidelines I follow for myself.

damn, sincerely appreciate your insight and the healthy dose of reality. thank you for shifting my perspective on the templates present in my life

Thank you. Just what I needed to hear.

Thank you for supplying the fifth description (emotionally available/unavailable guy). This EXACTLY describes my most recent ex-boyfriend. It wasn't obvious to me what was happening until I had already fallen for him and then he broke up with me. Couldn't understand why I couldn't see the signs clearly until hearing this description. Still heartbroken over what happened. To make it worse, 6 months later he starts dating someone else and 6 months after their relationship began he is living with her and most likely giving her what he couldn't give me. Makes me feel used. Wish these guys would just stay single until they figure their shit out instead of dating when they're not really emotionally available. Would save us so much pain. Lesson learned I suppose.

I watched this vid 3 hrs ago and ive already commented. I must say that that #4 about the enotionally available unavailable man has helped me find a resolve. Even though ive been working to move on, a part of my emotional body was still stuck with and on him seeking clarity and resolution. You've given me that. The emotional connection was amazing and what i deeply wanted but accepting the illusion is paramount. Learning to create the emotional connection with myself has been difficult as a child bc i was emotionally abandoned (and so was he), and i went from one intense relationship to another...now back to square one in trying to create that connection within myself.

WOW! Phenomenal advice for all to digest & process. Jack nails it every time. Thank you! 👏🏾👏🏼👏