5 Key Phrases to Disarm a Narcissist and Take Back Your Control

5 Key Phrases to Disarm a Narcissist and Take Back Your Control | Lisa Romano

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Lisa A. Romano Breakthrough Life Coach Inc

3 ай бұрын

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In this video, learn the 5 Key Phrases to Disarm a Narcissist and Take Back Your Control. Learning how to deal with a narcissist can be tricky. Learning how to spot a narcissist is not always easy, especially when dealing with a vulnerable narcissist who is incredibly thin-skinned and consistently positions themselves as a victim regardless of how their narcissistic actions impact others.
While not all narcissists are created equal, it is beneficial to get a clearer understanding of how a narcissist manipulates others through their lens, which is most often rooted in victimhood. Narcissists cannot see themselves objectively. When they are in pain and are not gaining the validation, sympathy, attention, or praise they seek, this will trigger their narcissistic injury and cause them to become emotionally dysregulated. To regain their sense of control, their ego will use backward rationalization to justify their negative perception of you, thereby positioning themselves as being victimized by you and the world
I created these phrases to help me develop space between me and those who I began to understand had high levels of narcissism, in order to help prevent me from being triggered and from being pulled into dark narcissistic rabbit holes.
0:00 Introduction
5:17 I am really sorry you feel this way.
8:40 I can accept your faulty perception of me.
13:55 Your anger is not my responsibility.
16:45 I have no right to control how you see me.
17:54 I guess I have to accept how you feel.
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Lisa A. Romano is a Life Coach and bestselling author who specializes in helping people reclaim their lives through ascending old thought patterns and healing faulty childhood subconscious programs. She is an expert in the fields of codependency, narcissistic abuse, and elevating consciousness. She is also one of the most popular meditation teachers on Insight Timer and is the creator of the 12 Week Breakthrough Coaching Program. If you feel invisible, unworthy, and lack a sense of self or purpose, Lisa's work in the field of personal development can help you gain the self-awareness required to break through.
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Пікірлер: 60

@TrishL333 3 ай бұрын

With my narcissist father I've learned to disconnect ignore and go silent. In my heart with God's love and light I send him love and light as he lives his experience it took me 48 years to realize this realize who he really was and protect myself from his toxicity

@sparklingloveandlight 2 ай бұрын

Same, they just don't "get it".

@carolentringer8836 3 ай бұрын

1. I’m sorry that you feel that way. 2. I have to accept your faulty perception of me. 3. I have to accept that you’re angry and I know I’m not responsible for your anger. 4. I have no way to control how you see me. 5. I guess I have to accept how you feel.

@itz_kale7791 3 ай бұрын

They're jealous and envious and show it in their words and actions but, will never admit it. They also say hurtful things and will later deny it, this is mind boggling! Thank you dear Lisa.🙂

@marianne5288 3 ай бұрын

And this is why no contact works so well.

@Conscious58 3 ай бұрын

wow, Lisa - once again you really displayed how deeply you know this personality disorder. Thank you for the useful phrases, otherwise, us empaths & codependents are sitting ducks to them! I know they have there own trauma but now that I know something about their negative slant on ALL people, it makes it very hard to have any empathy at all for them. They exploit ppl for their time/resources/energy w/o blinking an eye. Moreover, if they ever did shed a tear, it is ALWAYS bc they're feeling sorry for themselves - NEVER for anyone else. I'm sorry, I'll just say it - their actions/behaviors/wicked mindset are Evil. Can't see them as poor traumatized ppl, they are jealous, trouble-makers, manipulators, one-uppers, get-overs who are playing this Life game by completely different rules than you or I. They all think that everyone else is less than, stupider than they are & that we are blinded to their ways.

@lp4265 3 ай бұрын

OH MY GOSH 😮 Lisa must know my family ! For some reason two of my three adult children took after their narcissistic, arrogant father who has been married five times ( I have been married once) and their treatment towards me was emotional sabotage on my heart. I’m an extreme empath and cower around them. Your videos have helped me grow stronger mentally, emotionally and become braver. Thank you. 🙏🏻 ❤

@lovefaith1794 3 ай бұрын

My story as well dear❤

@lp4265 3 ай бұрын

@@lovefaith1794 ❤️🙏🏻🤗

@athenarojas2968 3 ай бұрын

Extremely helpful, thank you Lisa for your work. God bless you 💜

@stevenkovler5133 3 ай бұрын

Hi Lisa. I married who I thought was my soul mate . She turned out to be a total narcissist. Two years into my second marriage her third , I had a nervous breakdown. She had been emotionally and physically abusing me as well as almost holding me prisoner. She then went and spent my life savings. I left in Oct. 22 and filed for divorce. She pulled me back in and I gave her the last of my money to help support a business. I then left again and back and fourth. I asked her about her brothers and her relationships with them and some people who were going to help her in her business. Now I see that my therapists are right and that I should have stayed away all these years. Now she is about to loose her house for unpaid real estate taxes and she expects my mother to help her… she says that is the only family she has. My family does not like her anymore. She gets upset that my family won’t help. I just can’t seem to permanently walk away and I also feel so guilty about the taxes ( by the way , I gave her the money twice!, once she used it to pay her daughters rent , once she used it for expensive clothes , bags and a “ business “ trip. She believes the entire world is out to get her . The issue is I am left in huge debt. Lost my retirement and am so , so, so anxious. I was so happy and had a great life before I met her in 2019. I feel like I am the poster child for narcissistic abuse !! 😢😢

@Juke582 3 ай бұрын

You need to walk away forever from her and get your mom to do same and get into councelling!!! I was in narc marriage but I never lost money or anything except some trauma but not a nervous breakdown. You shouldn’t get into any relationships until you learn who you are and change YOU! We can’t just blame the narcissist for the toxic relationship. Both people are always sick and not normal to end up so damaged. A narcissist will never get therapy but we will and benefit from it greatly! I did and I am very tough with strong boundaries now and stay away from screwed up mentalcase people and I fixed my own childhood traumas! That was a huge help to me getting normal! I am happier!

@coldfact. 3 ай бұрын

She also could be a fake put into ur life to ruin you. Either in the spiritual or physical realm. I was married to someone for over 10 years & they were intentionally put into my life to sabotage it! I am targeted; do you know if u might be as well?

@kathy1001 3 ай бұрын

God Bless you, Steven. 🙏❤️

@tiaraproctor2213 3 ай бұрын

please get the book " The human magnetic syndrome -surviving narcissistic abuse" It changed my life and gave me my agency back. If you don't like to read the audiobook is free through audible. Its never to late to take your life back from someone who doesn't value all you have to offer this world 🧡 Sending love and healing for your journey forward

@jrcgjhughes 3 ай бұрын

I started to watch you videos at the end of March. I started out with 8 key phrases and Thank You. They helped me with my daughter so much. I used 2, 5, 7, and 8. Each time I used one of the phrases she got so upset. She even called me a Narcissist I couldn't help myself I burst out laughing. Watching her get angrier and angrier every time I used one of the phrases and I STAYED CALM. I even surprised myself. I Love being a Mother but when she told a major lie about me I was more hurt than anything. So I started looking up anything about lying and I came upon your videos. You have helped me so much. I used to be obsessed about why people (my Mother and sister) lied. and the more I watched your videos I was like hey that is Mom or my sister, and I was shocked when I'm like that's my daughter. So now since our or her blow up she is now not speaking to me and that is okay. I had to cut out my Mother from my life just because I didn't want to hate her and that is what I was starting to do because of the lies she was telling about me. Sadly my brothers cut her out of their lives to over the lies she was telling about me. I really don't understand how she could be like that. Her parents were amazing. At least that is what I have been told by my Aunts and Uncles. It makes me sad but I am at peace. So thank you and keep up the great work. Also I am sorry for what you had to go through.

@PaperclipProphets 3 ай бұрын

Your work is a blessing to countless people, thank you! May you be blessed as you continue sharing your wise words 🙏

@HeidiSchweichler 3 ай бұрын

omg, I wrote down and saved these 5 excellent responses when you made the first video a few years ago and I have used them and forwarded it to many friends over time, as recently as last week! They work. Thank you again Lisa ❤️🇨🇦

@lisaaromano1 3 ай бұрын

Wonderful!

@CottageRain 3 ай бұрын

I've always told them that I really appreciate their honesty in expressing their insight to me so willingly. It super gets them. Not what they expect.

@tanyakashyap6944 3 ай бұрын

Thanks Lisa ❤❤

@NatalieZii 3 ай бұрын

This was so timely. I’ve been reflecting lately on how we can protect ourselves from gaslighting and this was on point, as well as having a lot of insight into healing codependent instincts. Thank you as always.

@roserussom335 3 ай бұрын

This is a huge huge help in sorting things out. I made notes on index cards 😅 to help me remember some key ideas. Thank you!

@breakthroughmoment1647 3 ай бұрын

Another video you knocked out of the park, Lisa. Thank you so much!!

@kellishomaker8060 3 ай бұрын

I needed to hear this so, so much. My adult son has many covert narcissistic traits. I feel like my heart is empty. I’m giving up hope for him and I to have a meaningful relationship.

@LindaStokes-ff2kv 3 ай бұрын

Thank you for this message I can so relate to this

@Sam-pl3yd 3 ай бұрын

Thank you 🙏 Lisa

@maxson34 3 ай бұрын

When I finally got it through my head that he didn't care what I had to say or how I feel, I just stopped cold. I have nothing to say to him even. We have a child together and he keeps wanting to spend time together but never again.

@sparklingloveandlight 2 ай бұрын

They will never 'get it'. 💯 ❤

@barbarakelly1916 Ай бұрын

I tell myself these phrases in relation to the sibling in a toxic relationship pattern. Saying them directly to her would ignite Family Nuclear War. Your channel is very helpful in helping me navigate multi-generational unhealthy relationship patterns. Many thanks, Lisa!

@kathy1001 3 ай бұрын

So beautifully said. Thank you!!!

@audbaltzersenrameckers8832 3 ай бұрын

Thank you so much for this 🙏❤️💚❤️🙏 Very helpful. I'm going to a dinner tomorrow. This will help me to be even more calm 🌱🍃☘️💛🌼

@user-hp4qc1uo9k 3 ай бұрын

Brilliant, thanks...

@Katrica670 3 ай бұрын

@14:33 and soooo illogical! 🙄Those always deflect and project their inadequacies and insecurities on you!

@TrishL333 3 ай бұрын

, I'm finding that it's easier to disengage from talking to a human with a narcissist ego personality once he transitions and goes through life review then I will have the true soul to soul communication

@Conscious58 3 ай бұрын

Amen to that!! 100% agree!!! Spot on

@coldfact. 3 ай бұрын

Life review? Do you mean at the end when Jesus' returns? (The end) 🤔

@TrishL333 2 ай бұрын

@@coldfact. everybody who leaves their physical body and goes back to their Spirit body if you go to the top of KZfaq where the search is and type in Life review there are plenty of videos that talk about it

@lifeinamerica.veronika3341 3 ай бұрын

👍 You are absolutely right ❤People need to build china wall again narcissistic person . They are fantastic manipulators 🙌 Happy Easter , beautiful 🐰🐣🙌

@sulviagania5665 2 ай бұрын

Thank you so much ! Your videos are so helpful ❤

@sujata_155 3 ай бұрын

Ypur advice is so helpful, especially this video, i resonate so much to this, its like I always felt like ita my fault that they treated me like crap.

@amandamoss9160 3 ай бұрын

What do you call a narcissists that gets violent and trys to break my neck? And I have a spinal cord injury and detorating neck I've known for almost a year now that hes a nar.throigh your videos.hes insanely jealous if anyone asks how im doing hes suddenly starts making a face and everyone is saying oh somethings wrong with your boyfriend and im like here we go again!

@HeidiSchweichler 3 ай бұрын

omg, a Psychopath… BUT why do you worry about “what to call” him? He’s a murder waiting to happen!!!! As HG Tudor says in his videos, once you know, you GO. Please save yourself and don’t become another statistic 😢

@Katrica670 3 ай бұрын

@amandamoss he injured your spine, and also your neck initially?

@jayendepersil6607 3 ай бұрын

What if you physically cannot "walk" away?

@sharleenseas9861 3 ай бұрын

Proceed with criminal charges!

@MsMoosieify 2 ай бұрын

An abuser, mentally, physically and emotionally. He's trying to control you and who is around you. Get away as quickly as possible! If you can't financially, go to a battered womens shelter. His abuse will only get worse. My best friend was in an abusive relationship for more than 10 years. He tried to choke her several times, broke her jaw twice, was verbally abusive, threatened to kill her parents if she left. She finally left. He was an addict and alcoholic and he died years ago. She finally left him after being together for 12 years.

@whitehairvillain36 3 ай бұрын

To disarm a narcissist- first do something extremily disrespectful, then say in a calm, clear or even laughing slightly- "Hey... What are you going to do about it?" 😊 Make sure your a beast though... 😈

@MsMoosieify 2 ай бұрын

I used that once with my Mother in law and sister in law. They confronted me and told me I "HAVE to do this and that!". I calmly looked at them and said "or what? What do you think YOU are going to do"? I watched them stutter then say "you are married to my son and her brother".... I replied "okay. And??! What will you do if I don't?" They were speechless and I walked off. 😅

@whitehairvillain36 2 ай бұрын

@@MsMoosieify Hahahaha... Brilliant 🤭 I was laughing by the end of the first sentence 🤣

@inesborstel5592 3 ай бұрын

👍❤️

@matthewwozniak9138 2 ай бұрын

The more they get to know you, the more ammunition they try to acquire about you. I have nothing to hide about myself. I can only atone for my own sins.

@kathy1001 3 ай бұрын

❤❤❤❤