5 Psychological Techniques a Narcissist Uses To Destroy You

  Рет қаралды 15,047

Danish Bashir

Danish Bashir

Күн бұрын

Link to my best resources for healing:
linktr.ee/narcabusecoach
Chapters
00:00 introduction
00:48 1.Mind reading
02:30 2.Over generalizing
04:19 3.They think in black & white
07:04 4.They draw conclusions very easily
08:32 5. Extremely rigid thinking

Пікірлер: 121
@narcabusecoach
@narcabusecoach 15 күн бұрын
Link to my best resources for healing: linktr.ee/narcabusecoach
@enosh_art
@enosh_art 15 күн бұрын
I have paid amount for master co parenting.... where can I get all stuff. Please reply
@EllaMills-st1ci
@EllaMills-st1ci 13 күн бұрын
How did your mother cope with your father being a narcissists and how did leave your family
@dj8422
@dj8422 14 күн бұрын
Best example of that, when my alcoholic and narcissistic father tell me, how dare am I to think he is drinking??? Meanwhile, the bottle of alcohol is next to him on the table. And I show him the bottle and he behaves like he doesn't see it "I don't know what are you talking about???!". It's totally crazy how they can deny facts. I'm at my breaking point now, because he is not only twisting facts and evidence but somehow twisting my minds too....
@dr.muhammadamin1554
@dr.muhammadamin1554 15 күн бұрын
I got a call from one of my far relative. I was surprised because in my entire life we seldom have interactions. He told me that one of his poor friend looking for a security guard job if your organization needs guards please tell me. I said okay I will check. Then he told me that where are you working, who is your boss etc. I was foolish to told him many things about my organizations and my achievements. After few days my boss attitude becomes bad, my colleagues started looking down upon me. My supervisor told something indirectly which was actually about me. I was shocked that how come they now my secrets (problems, personal issues etc.) I was getting anxious because I didn't share anything about my personal life at my organization. After couple of months I was pretty relaxed and taking tea at the beautiful hill and I started thinking about that uncle. OMG my narc mom uses him to know about me because I went no contact for 7 months. I am shocked and terrified. I am about to lose my stable job. My mom has a very pious and religious image in my society but in fact she is extremely evil narcissist. Guys no contact isn't enough. You must think more than that. 😢
@PJM1879
@PJM1879 14 күн бұрын
Same story!
@klejjxd
@klejjxd 8 күн бұрын
When i went no contact (for the first time) with my ex, he told our mutual friends that i gave him HIV XD then some of them told me what he has been saying about me (obviously all of it wasnt even true) and when i confronted him about it, he said that he hasn't said anything about me and that all of our friends are lying hahaha
@teresitaekim2565
@teresitaekim2565 15 күн бұрын
You're on point, Danish. Narcissists are reading you wrongly, and they think they're always right. You know what? I counter attack that crazy assumptions of the narcissist. I told him, Stop complaining about me. If you are not happy, the door is open wide for you. Live somewhere else where you can be happy. No one is forcing you to stay with me. That's my answer to his accusations. He shut up because he knows he's wrong.
@Atheistbatman
@Atheistbatman 15 күн бұрын
Run. He didn’t shut up because he’s wrong…they are not capable of that. He stopped because he will get you back. He will get revenge in some way later you can’t imagine. Run and do not look back
@tulip811
@tulip811 15 күн бұрын
Girl YOU go pls
@76482
@76482 15 күн бұрын
​@@Atheistbatman, So many miserable levels to those narcs but I totally agree with you after 40 years married to one. Soon as we let up and think life is "normal" again, is when they'll ponce.
@AzuraShad0w
@AzuraShad0w 14 күн бұрын
@@Atheistbatman I totally agree, they are not capable of accepting that they could ever be wrong , they plan ahead and will pay you back for even the smallest slight
@CynthiaSchoenbauer
@CynthiaSchoenbauer 15 күн бұрын
I see how you say they are rigid in their beliefs. It makes more and more sense.
@toddaspaur
@toddaspaur 14 күн бұрын
I know it's not a unique situation but mine is surviving a horrible car wreck with spinal injury facial disfigured and learning to walk again. But the recurring nightmares were nothing compared to finding my wife had an affair and a very narcissistic personality. The trauma from the complete abandonment and trying to completely destroy me, has been more than I can bare. There is no book to learn how to treat someone like me. I've isolated myself from everyone but I know this is not healthy.
@01splitpea
@01splitpea 15 күн бұрын
My second spouse of 18 years was, as you describe, extremely rigid. I wasted years trying to force a square peg into a round hole. But, I finally learned I cannot control others, I can only control myself, and what I will and won't live with. My former spouses both had admirable qualities, but compromising was not one of them. Onward!
@duromusabc
@duromusabc 15 күн бұрын
Numbers 2 and 3 are called narcissistic splitting They hate nuances and can’t understand nuances (shades of gray - mixed bag of pluses and minuses in working progress of growth) - Because of narcissistic splitting, narcissists cannot grow themselves
@nicoloclemente6564
@nicoloclemente6564 15 күн бұрын
Sending love to all those who are fighting these demons, especially if they are your 'parents'. We are the bravest, we have Satan in our home and we are still moving forward.🎉
@nikkitran3501
@nikkitran3501 15 күн бұрын
🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏
@liseduedue2715
@liseduedue2715 15 күн бұрын
Good explanation 😞😎🦁
@marijkevandermeer2772
@marijkevandermeer2772 15 күн бұрын
Exactly 💯❤
@Melissa-cl2bl
@Melissa-cl2bl 15 күн бұрын
🤗🤗🤗❤️
@rahulm2827
@rahulm2827 15 күн бұрын
Thank you and lots of love and healing to you as well. I write really long posts on this channel which helps me to figure out things that actually happened and I did not realize the meaning of them ever in my life. Danish's explanations really help me to figure out many things I didnt even realize subcounsiously.
@01splitpea
@01splitpea 15 күн бұрын
We can't make people want to change.
@sohinisen3042
@sohinisen3042 15 күн бұрын
Each one of them is accurate. Very well explained as usual! They use these techniques in a very subtle way so that one is caught unawares. It takes some time to understand the workings of their mind and then you realise how insidious they actually are. They leave no stones unturned to kill/destroy your spirit. Never allow that to happen. Thank you for sharing this extremely insightful video. 🙏🏻
@matikramer9648
@matikramer9648 15 күн бұрын
Thank you, Danish Looking back now I was right to leave them as they were and where they were I wish I knew about narcissism 20 'years ago It would have saved my life and saved my mental health
@sherrihinton2885
@sherrihinton2885 15 күн бұрын
I too
@pheart2381
@pheart2381 4 күн бұрын
I've just recalled something that recurred regularly throughout my parent's marriage. If my mum broke anything,or a bulb blew when she turned a light on he would shout at her for ages that it was "the way you THUMP the kettle down,its the way you SNAP the light switch on,its the way you SNATCH at the tap". Mum is so terrified of breaking anything she wouldnt even change the batteries in her own radio. She would put the batteries next to the silent radio for when he got home from work for him to do. How sad. He also had a near obsession with door slamming,or rather what he percieved as slamming. If we closed a door or even a cupboard loudly his reaction was completely disproportionate.
@kristineoietibbits596
@kristineoietibbits596 15 күн бұрын
And the truth will set us free thanks again, my brother🚀
@sonjamccart1269
@sonjamccart1269 14 күн бұрын
Once I understood that all of their nasty comments about me and my son were actually projecting their own thoughts, desires and insecurities....it all made total sense! Now I know that HE was the one that was using me financially, whose personality completely changed the second I could not turn around and move back to the state I had just moved from, etc. etc. Now it doesn't bother me, I could care less what he thinks. This has helped me plan and make arrangements to move back near my son and sister.
@01splitpea
@01splitpea 15 күн бұрын
You make absolute sense, Danish Bashir. I've endured 2 marriages totalling 30 years of all you're saying. Bad days then, but better now that those two husbands are in the rear view mirror. Keep up the great work! I've shared to my social media. Cheers!
@GaryStewart2
@GaryStewart2 15 күн бұрын
The notion of a flawless marriage or relationship is a myth. There's no set formula for success; what works for one couple may not work for another. Yet, I've discovered that there's always a way forward, even in the most challenging times. Five years ago, my wife and I encountered significant hurdles in our marriage that nearly led to divorce. Despite the adversity, we managed to weather the storm and emerge from it with our bond renewed and revitalized..
@DavidVelasquez9
@DavidVelasquez9 15 күн бұрын
There is a lot of sense in what you just said and I hope mine works the same way too, we are currently separated but I cant live without her, I love her so much. wish I can get her back I can do anything to have her back, we have tried therapy amongst other things
@GaryStewart2
@GaryStewart2 15 күн бұрын
Its always difficult to let someone you love go, but in my case I had the help of a spiritual adviser who saved my marriage from collapsing her name is shelly renee white
@DavidVelasquez9
@DavidVelasquez9 15 күн бұрын
This is helpful, I will look her up online right now...Thanks.
@GaryStewart2
@GaryStewart2 14 күн бұрын
You wont regret it
@wendy5290
@wendy5290 12 күн бұрын
Happy for every story of marriages overcoming difficulties. However there is no way through for someone who can never be pleased no matter how hard their partner tries and won't talk reasonably about any issues.
@hettykoster9447
@hettykoster9447 15 күн бұрын
Mind reading is the most dangerous one indeed !! It is mysterious and scary ….
@sandrathomas2893
@sandrathomas2893 15 күн бұрын
They hook into your psyche from the demonic realm. They have help. They're not that smart. They have arrested development.
@gazeup5655
@gazeup5655 15 күн бұрын
Wow great advice I experienced all of that w my narc husband it made my head spin trying to find the truth. Thank God I know now that he was only using me
@AsifSyed123
@AsifSyed123 15 күн бұрын
There are billions of these narcissists out there and they all seem to be connected remotely.
@Kelly-oe8kr
@Kelly-oe8kr 14 күн бұрын
As unique and special as narcissists think they are it's remarkable how narcs all over the world, across different generations, who have never met each other before, all seem to use the same playbook.
@paulclinton6414
@paulclinton6414 14 күн бұрын
No joke, there has to be at least a billion in the world by default.
@laxmitomar5254
@laxmitomar5254 12 күн бұрын
They are proud of themselves That's confidence
@prophet1782
@prophet1782 15 күн бұрын
Wow. That is very deep. My narc mum never accepts if someone ssys he"s tired. A narc bro wouldnt accept if i was feeling sick.
@joseenoel8093
@joseenoel8093 13 күн бұрын
No kidding they'll run when you mention something's wrong with you, wait 'till they bang their foot, I asked him if he wanted me to call him an ambulance 🚑 after having done so last week, no reply, omg he'd yelled out loud like he'd taken a bullet! 😊
@user-q992
@user-q992 14 күн бұрын
Life with my narc mother who started abusing me from the age of 3 felt like moving forward with a sack of potatoes on my back! Managed to break free from her, only to end up with a malignant narc husband and life with him feels like carrying a sack of stones on my back😮
@BobTheSchipperke
@BobTheSchipperke 12 күн бұрын
Proactive non-cooperation meets purposefully misunderstanding.
@theyellowshoe
@theyellowshoe 15 күн бұрын
The more "research" I do I'm wondering if my (or any) narcissist has brain damage or some trauma he had. According to him he had a decent childhood, had both parents upper middle class, while myself I had a crappy childhood.
@tinaureta9891
@tinaureta9891 12 күн бұрын
Wow!!! This is soooooo ACCURATE! I believe BASHIR is God sent! Thank youuuuuu Bashir. Thank youuu! 😢😢
@bookmarkmonaco4255
@bookmarkmonaco4255 14 күн бұрын
My narc ex husband had an argument with himself about what he decided I was thinking about him. He asked the question, answered it and has got mad at me.
@lauraantic1384
@lauraantic1384 15 күн бұрын
When i speak truth he became violent so to save my life i had to make things up to survive even today it breaks my heart couse i was forced to say things i never done and Danish is right they are cruel delusional dictators
@MeCynthiaAnn
@MeCynthiaAnn 15 күн бұрын
Thank you again Danish..always such great truth you give in these videos. God bless you always. From JANESVILLE, WISCONSIN USA
@lindat1317
@lindat1317 15 күн бұрын
I’m from Janesville ❤😅 in Columbia County now…
@MeCynthiaAnn
@MeCynthiaAnn 15 күн бұрын
@@lindat1317 OOOOOOOOH WOOOOOOOOW…… You are from Janesville? How long has it been since you lived here? How awesome is that.
@jangunning1676
@jangunning1676 15 күн бұрын
​@@MeCynthiaAnn Hi! to you and @lindat1317 🙋😃. How interesting that you both are in Wisconsin and I'm new here also!! It's the Kenosha area for me. Looks like we all three have something in common besides being neighbors. Danish does fantastic in these videos. I've learned a great deal and he's been such a blessing in many ways. However, it helps to conversate with those who understand as well. We sure need all the support and encouragement we can acquire but there's blessings in being the supporter and encourager too. My story is a complex one and this year has been very hard from the start. I hope to tell my story where I can in hopes that it will create beauty for ashes not only in my life but for others as well. There's healing and strength for ourselves too in giving hope to others. Amen! I am currently still in my devastation of betrayal and chaos. I'm heartbroken many times over and it feels like there's too many shattered pieces to ever be made whole again. Even in the healing though, my wisdom assures me that I'll never be the same. My vision, my view of many things has been altered or completely changed. I feel the tremendous weight of it all both negative and positive. I'm learning too, that acceptance is vital to change. Your life really does depend on it because it determines your actions and you react accordingly. No matter what we do or say to try to "help" the person we love....we do not have the real power to do so. You can't help someone who has even turned away from their own beauty within and doesn't even believe their own truths. I have not only come face to face with what narcissism is, but it's reality that it devours so much and that it's a mental war declared and you didn't see it coming because you didn't want to see it at all. Denial. Denial about someone you love that you thought you knew, yet became your enemy of your well being. I've fought acceptance of these things and trying to "see the light" of peace and joy in the midst of it anyway. I've caused more problems for myself by not accepting reality of the situation. I have chronic health problems and all this and the situation plus unaccepting things has only prolonged my mental, psychological, emotional and physical pain. Now my health issues are increased in severity and the abuse of narcissism has created more. I've cried oceans and demand answers but the truths of those tears of pain are mixed with whispers of "knowing" that refuses to be denied. The depths of our soul and spirit longs for the sunshine to peer into every crack of our being....and those broken hearted pieces. I think the moment of the most powerful truths is when we hear our own souls gently tell us...... the only person we can really save is ourselves. Hope and faith are part of what acceptance is. I know I need help of various resources , new friends in a new state and city (I'm from Illinois) but I've taken the first step towards my own changes to rebuild my life and that's acceptance. As Joyce Meyer says: "I may not be where I need to be, but thank God I'm not where I used to be"......(she's referring to changing mentally). We are all a work in progress. Keep the faith everyone and I sure hope I've helped in some way. Thank you for your time in reading all this. Stay strong and also accept that you are not alone spiritually or with people who understand and may we all help each other along our paths to greater light by being one.....🙂🙏🙏✝️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️
@Tayson.
@Tayson. 13 күн бұрын
My narcissistic father hits all the points in this video. It's amazing and sad how he actually thinks this way and believes he's the one that should get the all the praise for everything, even though other people including myself have helped him throughout his journey smh🤦🏽‍♀️🤦🏽‍♀️
@VampBalletDancer
@VampBalletDancer 14 күн бұрын
Gods! Did you know my narcissists? My father and my ex-partner got called out and described so accurately that it truly is eerie. Thank you for the reminder that my abuse stories aren't unique and none of us are alone in the terroristic hellscape that is the narcissist's world.
@msshank8685
@msshank8685 15 күн бұрын
I signed up for a one on one , I cannot wait for danish to help me understand and confirm what I been asking for years !! 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽
@Marie10220
@Marie10220 15 күн бұрын
Danish can you please explain the difference between DID and a narcissist
@User-vibes1523
@User-vibes1523 15 күн бұрын
I'm eagerly waiting for this topic & wanna know about it. After listening the whole episode..I'm just speechless! How would you know every inch of this evil person!?
@VanessMorgan-bb6pp
@VanessMorgan-bb6pp 14 күн бұрын
They're very cold-hearted and they have no sympathy for anybody yes they did I think they know everything but they don't know everything I was in a narcissistic relationship but I left it because it became it was hard to get out of that I left it I felt like I was walking on eggshells
@user-ru9ig5we7o
@user-ru9ig5we7o 15 күн бұрын
I can confirm every word with 22 years of life with a narc husband now, without counting the previous 20 surviving my narc mother..
@mashkr
@mashkr 15 күн бұрын
Danish can you also do specific videos on narc abuse at workplaces?
@KatHay27
@KatHay27 14 күн бұрын
Perfect combination. Tough love yet soothing. Thank You
@seekerofgrace2058
@seekerofgrace2058 14 күн бұрын
Exactly. Crazy making.
@PearlTheSpinster
@PearlTheSpinster 15 күн бұрын
When you finally stand up for yourself and say you are bipolar and now you have to prove to CPS that they are lying. Proudly showed my Diagnosis that im not and kept it moving
@jilll4649
@jilll4649 14 күн бұрын
I find it hard to reflect on how much I’ve tolerated. It helps to learn all their tricks. It’s relief to know it’s not me. So many times I quiz myself and wonder if it’s me. Being able to see their behavior and place it in terms like gaslighting, projection, manipulation etc helps. Hindsight is 20/20.
@rolymishra-kb4th
@rolymishra-kb4th 11 күн бұрын
Absolutely Right sir...
@charlie-girl72
@charlie-girl72 13 күн бұрын
All my parents... its absolutely torture❤
@janetmcbee
@janetmcbee 14 күн бұрын
I can't belive I feel stupid .
@helpinyerdasellavon
@helpinyerdasellavon 15 күн бұрын
So accurate. Thank you, Danish ❤
@dclarke1896
@dclarke1896 14 күн бұрын
I can't believe I have dealt with this for so long! Thank you, Danish! 🙏
@Mirok605
@Mirok605 15 күн бұрын
keep up the good work sir
@nikkitran3501
@nikkitran3501 15 күн бұрын
Thank you so much
@MMM-tp3hv
@MMM-tp3hv 15 күн бұрын
People keep saying why don't you try couples counseling, after I've given up. And this rigidity of thinking and extrememe manipulation is the reason I don't want to (They can manipulate counselor too). How to convey that to others.
@Marie10220
@Marie10220 15 күн бұрын
I know two doctors that should Never practice again
@rh5273
@rh5273 13 күн бұрын
Omg u are so spot on!!!
@prophet1782
@prophet1782 15 күн бұрын
Very very Deep insight Danish. Now i can relate n understand certain people in my life.
@bonitaclaireloveday-wp9rq
@bonitaclaireloveday-wp9rq 14 күн бұрын
Thank you Danish Much L💚vE & Respect to you👏😊
@jennelleschulzeck9426
@jennelleschulzeck9426 15 күн бұрын
Everything you just stated, Danish, is my husband to a "T". Thank you for helping me to understand.
@rashmigama2417
@rashmigama2417 12 күн бұрын
Spot on😊
@mayhemslim1217
@mayhemslim1217 15 күн бұрын
In the no contact fase ..... but my mind is only drifting to her ....... she broke my heart and spirit.
@Sarah-qw7lj
@Sarah-qw7lj 14 күн бұрын
Bless you
@janetmcbee
@janetmcbee 14 күн бұрын
I thank you. But I'm in a mad mode. I wouldn't dare ask those questions. I guess I'm in grief. I won't hold on to this anger, its a Negitive, and I chose to not hold negitivity inside myself. I think by telling you and everyone this, it has helped me Don't be quiet. I can't belive he still has a hold on me,,, to a point.
@JenniferHobbs-yo2tr
@JenniferHobbs-yo2tr 15 күн бұрын
This guy is great!👻🧘👣
@yonettekelly2406
@yonettekelly2406 14 күн бұрын
Okay so true So Danish how do I respond to these narcissist techniques? Please do a video on how to respond to these techniques they use on us in order to overcome them.
@user-wn1dl1ku5u
@user-wn1dl1ku5u 14 күн бұрын
So it's another win situation
@prophet1782
@prophet1782 15 күн бұрын
Danish ano v deep narc trait. When my narc mum wud see me n my eldest sis together it bugged her. Same with an Aunty if me n her eldest son. She'd go mean towards me. I'd like to know the precise pin point reason.
@indukumhar4504
@indukumhar4504 13 күн бұрын
Why they come in our dreams
@Divinebanda
@Divinebanda 14 күн бұрын
The 555th like is mine.😃
@Atheistbatman
@Atheistbatman 15 күн бұрын
No No No No No (with a scrunched up face) for 56 yrs…even if it’s what they said a week before or they’ll say No it’s (whatever I just said). Everything I uttered was answered with No…so quick and automatic and consistent. In February I said No More, No Mas no mas and have felt better every day No contact means No Contact and it is good
@Amanda-ev3lg
@Amanda-ev3lg 15 күн бұрын
Oh goodness the sky is blue.."no.."
@Atheistbatman
@Atheistbatman 15 күн бұрын
@@Amanda-ev3lg No it’s blue
@susanralph274
@susanralph274 14 күн бұрын
so they are biometric devices.
@VanessMorgan-bb6pp
@VanessMorgan-bb6pp 14 күн бұрын
An update believe what they want to believe and everything they say about me is not true because I keep putting me down and I'm still traumatized by this a little bit because it still keeps laying out my mind
@Dsrgroup555
@Dsrgroup555 15 күн бұрын
Ultimately my narcissistic wife will pay heavily for her actions And no will support her Bed ridden with no one
@sandradorsey5001
@sandradorsey5001 15 күн бұрын
I 💬🤔 think this is in their 🧬 DNA, other ancestors, I'm sure they were this way. And some people it skips in family's. They are 👿 demonic as well because, they know what they are doing.
@dakoderii4221
@dakoderii4221 15 күн бұрын
It's in everyone's DNA ever since the fall. Some people choose to go with the evil and sear their conscience. They become their own god and see the mere mortals as playthings. They open up doors where demons can now use them as playthings.
@sandrathomas2893
@sandrathomas2893 15 күн бұрын
​@@dakoderii4221💥
@lonnamercier7833
@lonnamercier7833 13 күн бұрын
@@dakoderii4221. Perfect explanation.
@tulip811
@tulip811 15 күн бұрын
I still don't understand how y'all lived like this for 20 years. Is 20 years the limit to endure the pain lol
@foelddraig142
@foelddraig142 15 күн бұрын
Genuine question: If we know that narcissists are born from trauma and abuse at a young age.. dont they deserve some support and understanding? They didnt ask to be as they are.
@tommcewan7936
@tommcewan7936 15 күн бұрын
They deserve it, but it's not safe to try and give it to them, and they are incapable of accepting it anyway. That's why the condition's so tragic, we all became their victims precisely because we tried to be reasonable, kind and understanding to them, and in their toxic shame they loathed us for it and compulsively used it to control us. You simply can't help them; they hate the mere idea of being helped so much that they'll react as if you'd tried to hurt them. The more kindness you show them, the more they will hate you.
@foelddraig142
@foelddraig142 14 күн бұрын
@@tommcewan7936 I understand your view. However after being abused by a narcissist and learning about narcissism I reflected and realised I had been behaving in a narcissistic way myself all my life (but in a lesser way). I am trying not to be that way and it is a concerted effort to really think about how I behave and react. I dont want to be this way any more..
@myisha9254
@myisha9254 15 күн бұрын
First
@Eleinalove7
@Eleinalove7 14 күн бұрын
Bravo Danish!
@Mirok605
@Mirok605 15 күн бұрын
keep up the good work sir
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