👌More videos can be found on this topic at kzfaq.info/sun/PLcB3trehXswir7EQOsUEZSu7NouGVkrI6&si=1hOjwu3BsD_g2qZw ❤️Self help activities and worksheets and concierge coaching with Dr. Snipes can be accessed at DocSnipes.com 👍Online Courses for Continuing Education (CEU, OPD, CPD) and Substance Abuse Counselor Certification

Let's face it, you are the mother-type figure of what I never had, having had both a narc mom and dad. I don't need a full-out mother, I am realizing, but I DO need to know what I missed and the wonderful feeling of what it feels like to get it. What I was afraid of and confused about in the world made me need someone to run to besides my self. I always had my empathic self (mostly used for others in a role), my medication, and my trauma response to soothe me, but you help me piece together exactly what I would have had. To have had a good mother would have been HEAVEN! When you interact with me, I see a lot of what was missing and I would have very much loved. Counselors never gave me anything either, when they should have at least modeled a representation of what I missed. (My counselor dropped me because I was too "needy"... when I was not.) But you do that for me. You model what I missed and can actually learn to make up in my life now with my own new experiences, learning, and choosing in relationships. Thanks for not shirking from the representation, like my mother did. From the age of 1 or 2, she seemed to thinks females should be "independent women" and tried to always show us girls that "she was". (She was a women's libber... and never picked up ANY of the female role... we ate out of cans in the 60's! But she was also narcissitic and we had to do everything for her.) 😨

I'm already crying! If I had don't I would have stopped it... How does a mom ever get over that?

I struggle with knowing how to handle my emotions. I know what to do, I just have a hard time dealing with them I know my skills of mindfulness, emotional regulation, and distress tolerance. Though I know what to do, I don't always know how to carry it out. Thank k you Dr Snipes for reminding me that I don't need to beat myself up. As the 12 step program says to take it a day at a time, so mindfulness reminds us to take it moment to moment.

Thinking about talking to myself this way is the kindest way I’ve treated myself in a long time. Thank you!

Thnx, cause I have been lost in self criticism for a long time. Looping in mind all the things I am regretful, and finding no peace.

My God is unbelievable that you are picturing me exactly how I feel and felt about few things that happened in the last few years and my mistake is trying to figure out how to fix it and I always put myself in that position of higher standard on myself something I don’t ask anyone to be I beat myself up all the time for things I should have done different and like you said is the past I have to learn and move on and be more gentle with myself and loving me more thank you so much I really need to heart this thing the way you said otherwise it have taken more time to understand now is time to heal

This is a Really Wonderful video!!!! Thank YOU Doctor Snipes for ALL of your exceptional information, and your impactful and insightful delivery--just to name a few!!!!

Doc Snipes you are going to hit 300 k followers before you know it. I’m so proud of this channel and I’m not a therapist or a student. Lol. I do work a homeless shelter as a shuttle driver and logistics department. This channel helps me in so many ways yo keep my own emotional bank 🏦 full. I appreciate you and congratulations 🎉 ahead of time. I’m going to blink my eye and you will be hitting 300 k.

Excellent video Dr. Snipes.

I need this, helping an ill friend & making mistakes

Accepting that we don't have control over other people and accepting that we don't know what we don't know, should not end up in regret. Strife. It's simply comes down to the realization that the next best course of action is to be better prepared next time. Seems to comes down to acquiring the wisdom to know the difference.

You have a beautiful smile. Your work has helped me. Thank you, 🙂

Wow wish I found this channel sooner thank you so much ❤

So insightful and helpful!!!

Very helpful. A lot of regret from inaction.

i think its a core connection-trauma that goes deepest when our main connective person gaslights us, or otherwise ignores or minimizes or abuses our connection with them, and it leaves us wondering where 'home' is, cause they were it. Those traumas and psychological/emotional cuts don't don't have anywhere else to go except into our body/emotions. and we may not have the words to even process whats happening/happened. So we just feel (I feel) lost, in outer space. and we think that feeling is us, that that's who we are. its not who we are. but its all we have where the empty space is where our relationship was supposed to be, and theres nothing. so how does that feel? the worst kind of lost, and then we get mad at ourselves for not 'being more' or 'enough' for people to make them want to be with us, connect with us, or otherwise make life work. Narcissists can get very dark and deep, so it hurts when they choose that over our relationship or even being a human being to us. (me). yeah.

Thank you this is so helpful

Thank you sooo much for all of your videos Doc Snipes! You cover so many important topics.

One of your best! Thank you.

This is so good! Such an important topic

I love this stuff! I call it "girl stuff", along with fashion, and baby tips. 👧

Thank you!!

Thanks!

Thanks a mill .

My problem is i knew what to do back then but was unable to do it as i was being emotionally blackmailed - i was effectively in a corner & so damned if i did & damned if i didn't, so i took the option that gave me an easier life at the time - the less bumpy route. Turned out it wasn't exactly easier as nothing i did was ever right & it caused a lot of problems later on, too, not least with pent up resentment & anger inside myself. True, i obviously didn't know as much back then as i do now & would have probably handled it more calmly if i'd had the skills i have mow, but i still beat myself up a lot of the time when things go wrong in the present becasue they seem to be a consequence of what i should've done & didn't do back then. My intelligent brain knows it's fruitless to dwell on this as i can't change a thing of what happened but i can live & work on things now, today, but it doesnt stop the pain of the past coming back again & again. I guess the crux of the matter is i blame myself for what i see as taking the 'cowardly' route, but back then it was a case of damage limitation for myself & those around me so i let it go on, & i guess i have to try to find a way to forgive myself for that (or at least find a way of reconciling my actions to myself) because whatever the outcome would've been, it wouldn't have been a pleasant one either way. Thank you, Dr Snipes, for your videos-they are helping me very much along the road of my healing journey.

My problem in my youth is that I froze up a lot.

Thank you💛

Does anyone know how to get a copy of the transcript? KZfaq took away the copy paste ability and I would like to take notes

Is there a dependable way of contacting you? Tried on Facebook messenger. Looking at taking one of your courses.

What do you do with a partner of 38 years who has resentment & anger towards you & your choices & says they couldn’t ask because they felt powerless.

Aww ur brilliant Belfast Ireland 🇮🇪 😎

I was having tachycardia and mindlessly gave out my social security number. There seems something unethical about asking for ssn while in a level 4 emergency, and not mentioning why they want it. Now I have to worry about ID theft, as well as being charged almost $20k for an hour there.

I was trying to contact you too. Is there a way?

So cute🥰

❤

🥺👐🏼🆒info, thanks.😇 🕊️✝️

Bye,

Thanks!