Hi Charlotte 💖

You need to get the judge mallet regardless!

I love Nord VPN I only use it now nothing else 😁 thanks to you

JUDGE MALLET! Please 😌👌💖💖 love the heck out of all your videos.

Hi Charlotte. I understand what you mean about your name been pronounced differently. My mom named me Heidi, but most of my family lives in Mexico so they can't pronounce my name very easily or even spell it. Most of time they pronounce my name like Hadis the god of underworld lol

I love this concept! This is how it should be!! We all already know attending a wedding that it’s all about the bride AND groom, (they forget it’s about him too) as it’s their special day, but to make it a competition because your guest come looking beautiful is envious behavior which is toxic and not a good characteristic to have. I want everyone to look beautiful and handsome at my wedding as a matter of fact, I’d take pictures with them as a keepsake, because I would love that we all look amazing and capture the moment!!! I wouldn’t feel slighted or up staged unless a woman deliberately comes dressed in a wedding gown with a bouquet of flowers, a veil and train.. then obviously that’s an issue😂

In Addis, you gotta wear white (and I know Americans have don't wear white or anything white-ish at weddings rule). It's not necessity but it's definitely preferred. Everyone better look their best cause honestly, the bride would still look better than anyone there so it's not an issue. Wearing any less than your best is actually weird since you'd be underdressed. Weddings, birthdays and graduations are the places where the guests are expected to go all out. Whether the main person who's being celebrated is upstaged or not, they'd be the center of attention so there isn't even a competition. Idk why the westerns have this unnecessary and dramatic concept.

Not quite sure it's solely "western". There are just other ways to make a bride shine in other cultures. When my aunt married, in my uncle's family (not in the western tradition at all), she wore 5 dresses, changing as the day went on, each dress in a more ridiculously ornate and fastuous fabric than the former. If that doesn't scream "I'm the queen today", I dunno what does...

@@k.v.7681 Every bride goes out to make the "I'm the queen" statement. But unlike the western ones, and like your aunt, the bride goes all out to outshine everyone instead of being offended by the guests for looking their best. They're not wrong for looking their best.

@@rukia5678 Sure but my point is that in a way, western tradition makes it so brides are "easily" outshined, in a way? At least when people stick to tradition. A single dress. White. On a budget (let's be real, having credit cards to burn cash is quite uniquely american, you'd be hard-pressed to find other western countries where your average Jane affords a dress the price of a new nice car...). I also wonder how inflated the bad impression about western brides is because of the internet. Internet works in bubbles, and being on the western bubble here, and people having quite a tendency to look at negatives and blow them out of proportion compared to reality... and on the flip-side, western is broad, because sure the attire tradition is similar, but the spirit isn't. Where I live, most brides feel and look special but also couldn't care less about competition and instagram shoots. The reception is comprised of family made-food, good drink, and general familial fun. The whole formal image of a "western wedding" with high gastronomy and stuffy procedures is really not THAT common on the whole. Edit: all that to say that yes, people should dress nicely, sure, and shouldn't "dress down" but thee's still a couple key points of finesse and courtesy that can be expected (like for instance not wearing white).

😂😂😂 I love your reply to your cousin.

So instead of enjoying her wedding she spied on her guests and took notes??? Wow,,, she must really love her husband!

Best reply. That will leave her annoyed.

I'd be sorely tempted to write back and grade her wedding dress. Neckline too low / high. Length. Skirt type. Sleeves. And I'd follow it up with "Why did you pick a dress that made you look fat? Or was it not the dress?".

Hahaha! Now that's the way to handle that BS for sure!

Yes!! She actually became a literal PRINCESS, so seriously awesome!

​@@hannahhester8376 Yup, might've became Snow White....

I thought she was dressed up like Cinderella...

She might have meant "dressed up like a car crash", given how Grace met her tragic end.

Wow! So true

I think it was just a trashy wedding

Cocktail attire requires at least a button-down shirt, sport coat, and preferably tie, or a dress that is within 3-4” of the knee, above or below. Nicer than garden party, less formal than black tie. Any of the guests could just…google it, it sounds like the attire was listed on the invites?

@@Miss_Camel i almost feel like the guests were told casual except for the one girl

My exact same thought

I was having a hard time believing the validity story. I don't like to doubt people but it's such a huge leap. Surely at least some of it was fabricated or enhanced.

Right? And she didn't even go out of her way to buy something new.

Exactly.

That's what I was thinking, why were the bride and groom dressed in casual clothes if it was cocktail, makes it sounds like op was sent a different invitation than the other guests.

Yet!! I’m the 666 comment…. Sorry but yeah I agree

This is evidence that people use words they have no Idea what the definition is. Lol they meant casual lol

Yep, if it was a themed wedding, they should have warned the guests as well, I guess

@@Bane_Amesta yep. If she wanted gothic, they should have held the wedding in a cemetery 😂

I feel like she thought cocktail meant bar attire, but if her and husband decided to wear gothic style they should’ve requested black attire , that way despite someone being gothic/ comfortable in goth attire or not, can still just wear black and that way it doesn’t seem to be someone can out do the bride.

@@kaseysewick1691 right. You can’t blame someone for crossing boundaries you haven’t set 😂

@@CarriettaCarrieWhite no. I’m not a hair expert

SLAYYYY! The audacity of some people to be so hateful to someone who is just trying to do their job! I hope your daughter is having the best life she possibly can!

It wasn't a woman?

​@@stephaniewozny3852Why does it matter?

@@PirateSkitchan because its usually women who harass and abuse customer service workers.

Fr. Im a goth too. If that dress and heavy makeup was truly what the bride wanted, she should’ve owned it and communicated the theme. Instead, she got jealous of someone in a style she asked for. I’m also sick of everyone saying how ugly her dress was. She picked the dress. It’s her wedding and her style. But again, even she seemed to think her own outfit wasn’t good enough.

Exactly! It seems like she wanted "beer attire".

@@jaggae9 Hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha !!!!

@@jaggae9 exactly!!🤣

LOL for real! I was thinking that too. Should have been more specific but as soon as I read what her wedding dress and makeup was like figured she has no class anyway!

Seems like she got causal and cocktail mixed up going by the groom wearing a tux graphic tee with jeans

exactly

I once heard a long time and very experienced colleague saying very humbly to an irate new customer : " Thank you for being patient with me, because I'm new on the job and I'm very nervous. " Stating a blatant lie about the attitude of this customer sobered him and he replied : " ... oh well ... you're welcome (?) ". Worked like a charm.

Exactly 💯

Not the a-hole people need to be in control of their emotions and not bother people lol but I love this

Yes, and actually might help them think twice before they try to hurt someone

I kinda feel you! I moved to a foreign country and noone except for my bf can say my name correctly. Even his family. I'm also a bit anxious while introducing myself as I want to use the proper pronunciation but I know they are not gonna say it right so I usually just go along with the local version of my name. It all feels a bit weird

lol change your name to something super basic just in spite of this. You don’t even have to legally change it. Just say “I’m Sarah now”

Wow you vet “anxious” because of this? Grown a bone. Ffs

Similar experience but it more other people skip over my name and assume it’s the English form not the French. Even the Spanish version is slightly different in spelling and pronunciation. I kinda just answer to anything close enough and just value the spelling as a personal identification when it comes down to it

It's not hard,pronounce it the way you prefer.

Right?!?!

Yeah…Clearly no one googled cocktail attire…they just wore what they wear when they go get drinks at the local bar

Yeah... That's why I have a problem believing the story. If everyone else dressed differently, there must have been a reason other than every single person except for OP being dumb.

Including the bride 😂

@@Ysmir. Or… The bride verbally told her friends “casual” and didn’t checking the invites. I didn’t send invitations but everyone was either family or co-workers and verbally told that they should come to the church, that we were having a small private family only lunch, but there was an open house party at my in-laws. We also handed out flyers at work. No dress code, just show up. When I said to people “everyone is welcome at the church and the open house later” people looked confused. What I didn’t know was that my fiancé thought that if you came to the church you were obligated to bring a present so he told then that the ceremony was family only… hence the looks of confusion. When we walked down the aisle, there was about three friends and the family. I said after to my husband “I was surprised that so few friends showed up. “That was when he siad “Oh. I didn’t want everyone to bring gifts so I said that the wedding was private”. That evening, it was a packed house at the in-laws’ (and it was the World Series and the Blue Jays won… and everyone brought gifts. What a dubderhead.

daniel later: "you shall call me Thor"

@@iramage2235 tbh that'd be a win win situation

Plottwist: daniel will come out as trans later

@@ms-fh8ed and the moms pronounciation will be right! daahniel, sounds like danielle :) maybe they switch the name to danielle in that case, haha

@@dione__fernnn it doesn't really sound that close to danielle, everyone keep saying that i am starting to think you are not getting right the pronunciation of one of the two, because daniel is Dah-knee- ehl, and each syllable is said short and blunt. While danielle has the "ielle" part more extended and the 'L" sound is softer and more like...dragged. also the da in danielle is more like an long open " duh" sound , than a short blunt "dah". But anyway , i also thought the kid being trans thing XD, i say the kid would change the name to Amanda, that is said the same in both pronunciations, and that would be the end of the conflict ( because the feminine form of daniel in spanish is " daniela" , not danielle, and daniel with spanish promunciatio is an only boys name, so that would keep the conflict going)

I agree I find it so insanely frustrating, because I can see both of their perspectives, and I have my own personal feelings about “ethnic” names (for the record, I have one). I really think that they need to sit and talk.

I also come from Mexican American parents. They called me an Anglo Saxon first and middle name. Thankfully they agreed on a pronunciation right away but as I grew up the schools always choose the Anglo Saxon pronunciation not once did they correct them. They just didn’t care. Also it caused no complexity in me it’s just different pronunciation. I feel like the father needs to get over himself and keep calling him Daniel. Eventually the kid will pick the one HE likes the most when he’s old enough. Just because most of her family will say it the Spanish accent way doesn’t mean he’ll like it more in fact because it’s common he may agree with his father and opt for the more “fancy” American English pronunciation.

I am a South Indian kid, my parents moved to North India. Nobody pronounced my name right. Nobody. It was frustrating, and I hated it. I feel the father's frustration,.

@@RKNancy the difference is, is that you’re not Northern Indian. This family is Hispanic and the mother is a Spanish speaker and he is by default Mexican. So he is part of that culture and Daniel said in a Spanish accent is how his family would say it if the Dad did not hate his own heritage. The boy cannot forgo his heritage because his Dad doesn’t accept himself and his wife, and the boys literal bloodline.

​@@SongofBeauty you're literally ignoring that half of his heritage is white, that she AGREED he could pick the name, and that she OUTRIGHT CHANGED the agreement by saying she would not pronounce it the way he asked because she "didn't want an anglicised name". She's actively refuting their agreement to spite him.

Exactly she said his name was too anglo

EXACTLY. Blatant disregard and specifically said "too anglo". I am married into a Latin/Italian family and even my husband has had to tell his family to back off with things like this. Especially when they try to exclude me from conversations by speaking Spanish (until the day my husband told them he waa telling me everything they were saying). This is a common issue in Latin families Charlotte, it wasn't just "her accent" but sure lets call the man who wants his SON's name to be pronounced how he likes an AH. 🤨

agreed, people seem to be ignoring the part where he said "she speaks English with a very clear American accent"

And it low-key bothers me that Charlotte is clearly saying "rules for thee but not for me", no matter how much I like her, I can't agree with hypocrisy.

I agree with OP on the name pronouncing thing. My name is “Holly” but anyone who has a Hispanic accent always pronounces it as “Holy” or “Hooly” and I absolutely cannot stand it!!! 🤷‍♀️ I would get annoyed if someone was constantly pronouncing mine or my child’s name incorrectly and in fact I do get upset at like automated messages that pronounce my sons name is name is “Reily” we just spelled it differently than like Riley or whatever and the automated messages always pronuce it like “Ree-ley” and it’s annoying lol but I don’t understand how someone can mis-pronounce “Daniel” it’s a pretty common name… 🤔

It's a big deal because the mom is capable of cooperating but isn't. This is a bit of a betrayal. Men don't like that. She wouldn't like it reversed.

Yup. He should start introducing "Rosa" as "Rose." What's good for the goose...

Yeah I get it too honestly

It's not an accent thing it's literally that she is refusing to take his wishes into account and is getting everyone else to follow suit.. I would be furious.. names are so important and depending on pronunciation, spelling, and origin can have very different meanings... the name you choose for your child is like a prayer you speak over them every single day and for you and your spouse to be at odds like this it's very confusing and upsetting for the child.. (my parents could never agree on my brothers name and settled for calling him different things, he hates it to this day)the wife is the asshole here for sure

She also made it clear when she said that she didn’t want any of their kids to have any Anglo names. So she knows what she’s doing and she doesn’t care she and she does not care the deal SHE made with her husband

My names Georgia, my little sister stared saying it like JoJo because she couldn’t say my name when we were both really really little. And then it become a name only her and our parents used when I was small. My sister name is Zoë so it became JoJo and ZoZo. Sometimes my parents use it every so often like an affectionate they when they hug us or something. But my sister and I don’t use the nicknames with each other now we aren’t kids. But I still think it’s adorable that she called me that as a baby

Damn, the niece could have been nicknamed like a pokemon based on that nickname (like, it could have evolved into Charmander to make a joke or smthin. Maybe only the Pokemon fan of my brain that thought out that) Anyway, similar thing for me: The grandson among the cat family that my family has was initialled named Moïse (Moses in English) because one time, je walked on what was covering the waterpool, so it was like he walked on water (my sister and I were little, please spare us the comments about us being uncultured swines or smthin), but my cousin, who was even younger than us (well, still is, but ykwim right?) couldn't pronounce it and ended with Maurice. Which coincided with an ad and a joke so Maurice it was. Second cat story like that, our adopted cat was named Minus, as a little but endearing kind of way mean name, and he still has a baby cat face now, and because of that and the fact he's very affectionate and wanting hugs and cuddles, when smthin was done by a cat we all were saying like "Meeeuuuuh non, c'est pas lui!"( Naaaah, it's not him! but with the local accent) and since he's called Menon. (On his veternarian/health book with all the papers, it's still named Minus, but he only knows Menon now)

"Char" actually means "tank" (the military version) in French.

My neice could not say my daughters name so she become lala

I agree. It would be one thing if OP dressed over the top, but what she described sounds like very standard, tasteful wedding attire appropriate to the dress code stated on the invite. Also, why would the bride request cocktail attire if she and groom were going to dress like they did?

At my first wedding, I really did not care as much as I did about my new husband's and some of his family members' and friends' behavior. (That really should have been the final blaring signal that the I just need to do a 180 and end the marriage before it starts.) At my second wedding there were two individuals' clothing options who at the time pissed me off. One was my MIL's caregiver, specially hired for that weekend who decided (not being Indian) she would wear a nice saree like my MIL while dominating my MIL and acting like she was an honored guest rather than there as support and my godson, who did not want to be there (but his parents would not let him stay home, showed up unwashed wearing his rag/rebellious clothing and a major scowl for the whole service. (Note, in regards to my godson, I was more pissed at his parents for not letting him stay home and making my wedding a teachable moment.)

@@wanderer7956 sounds to me like the bride didn't remotely know what cocktail attire *IS* and just copied invite language from an online template for invites.

At the end of the day, they are the bride. The attention will be on you regardless.

I think that this follows the thread of do you want a marriage or do you want a wedding. As long as the guest isn’t being overtly disrespectful ( like wearing a wedding dress herself, or something completely ostentatious) this feels like much ado about nothing. It’s still the bride’s day and she seemed like she was going after a very specific look. Whomever the person she went with should have given her a heads up about what they would interpret as appropriate and their general style. How is a guest who is new to the group supposed to know if they are unorthodox and choose something to wear based on that?

It sure would be, I got the gears in my brain screeching just trying to process that

I bet there were many other reasons, when someone doesn't even respect the way you pronounce your own name.

My ex tried to argue with me about the color of My eyes?! He said they are hazel and they're not, they are brown. Like, I'm sorry my ordinary brown eyes are not good enough for you smh

My uncle-in-law pronounces our daughters name wrong all the time. I have talked to him about it several times, even offering him a nickname instead, which my husband hates but would prefer over the butchering of her name. "Ay" to "ah", xi to "she", and all broken up into different syllables like he is intentionally pronouncing each sound wrong. Augh. I get it, some things are accented and some things can be hard to pronounce in a different language, but at least try or take the way out. He is slowly converting other people to his pronunciation who have been saying it correctly for years and I am about ready to loose it. I correct him and them every time but apparently I don't have as much clout with the family even though I am her mother.

It sounds like your husband failed to communicate the dress code to you. What did he wear? Especially if it was only you who stood out. Also, he should be defending you here.

With all due respect, you had no idea you were going to a trashy wedding. That was your husband’s responsibility to let you know and also to have your fucking back when everyone started shitting on you.

Wow, trailer trash

Same her! Hubby was best man. The last wedding I had been to was nice dress. I show up in a nice dress only to find everyone in jeans t shirts and hoodies. I'm dying of embarrassment. I sat alone in during the wedding. One the way to the reception I had them stop by our house so I could grab a change of clothes. My daughter's were dumbfounded. They had spent hours helping me do my hair and makeup so I looked nice. ( I normally am in jeans and my hair is in a ponytail) I haven't been to a wedding since.

You did your job according to the info you received. It was not your fault, and if those people couldn't understand that they were a holes

I worked in retail and I wish I could have done this!

I agree, it’s a great way to teach Karens that their behavior is not okay.

Yes, people do lose their jobs in restaurants due to customers who arrive already angry and take it out on the wait staff because they can. Managers are far more concerned with keeping customers than with keeping staff. This is even more pronounced in wealthy areas where customers spend heavily and staff can be treated unfairly (and undertipped, even for impeccable service). Decades ago I worked in a restaurant in central Virginia. VERY wealthy country clubby clientele. It happened a lot because the owner-manager allowed it to happen.

Yes! A few years ago my coworker came to work (retail) with freshly polished nailed and bumped one and it chipped. A customer complained that she had multicoloured chipped nails that made her look unkempt. She got written up! I was there that day and her nails looked fine. It was one chip! And her mismatched nails were the style of having one sparkly nail on the wedding ring finger of each hand. It was what most people get if they get gel nails. She was a good employee lol we had new rules put in place about nail polish that they all had to be the same colour and never get chipped 🤣 I would have loved to prank mean customers that people got fired for stupid complaints

Yes, this is the perfect “revenge” against complainers! I love it!

I'm pretty sure she is doing it on purpose since, as she said and everyone is ignoring or hiding over "just an accent" (an excuse already debunked since she speaks english with american accent): she does not want their children to have Anglicized names. So actually I have no idea what OTHERS are smokin here, because this goes beyond a naming She knows her husband, she AGREED to decide a name each, YET refuses the name the parent said. People named in a certain way WILL correct someone if you get the accent wrong, so why are we ignoring when the Anglo one is named wrong when, sorry for repeating but is necessary, *she speaks english with american accent* ? NTA, his wife doesn't respect him/his choices. End of story

does it really matter tho? that's the point

@@dishasharma5624 It does. As I said many people WILL get angry or correct if their name is mispronounced, because the accent DOES make another name. The mother is trying to reinforce another name, disrespecting her husband choice. Is not that hard to understand. It goes deeper, is a matter of respect, something a couple should have, but the wife obviously does not for her husband

Yeah it also sounds to me like it's intentional, as she clearly stated that the reason of not calling "Daniel" with the American accent is not having an Anglicised name, and it's not like, that's just her accent and she can't pronounce it any other way. It's not about "hiding" anyone's heritage or not being proud enough of it, it's just that they made an agreement which she refuses to go along with. Idk, I'd just start calling the older one Rosemary xD

@@dishasharma5624 If it doesn't than the little girl should be called Rosemary.

Agree. I don't know what people aren't getting. It isn't that hard to practice a single word until you pronounce it correctly. Especially when it's your own sons name and as noted she seems to be able to speak fluent English with an American accent. The father says he doesn't care but he clearly does or we wouldn't be here and it sounds like his wife is flippantly disregarding his concerns. I'm not implying she's terrible or anything either. She probably doesn't recognize that this is important and just enjoys letting her cultural roots flow out. The couple needs to talk this out more.

@@jontobin5942 Most wyt people are uncomfortable with making judgments about somebody’s culture, so that just agree to not look bad.

I kinda agree as it sounds like the wife is doing it on purpose so both kids would have a Spanish sounding name as he said her ability to pronounce the name correctly is not an issue.

@@loverofawesomeness1 being from a Spanish speaking country, the pronunciation of Daniel in English isn't at all difficult, so I say she's just being petty for the sake of it.

According to him, she even said she doesn't want him to have and "anglicized" name. She has decided that he would not have the name he chose, he would have the version of the name she chooses. Basically, she told him he could choose, then proceeded to ignore his choice because it was not the right one in her mind.

She literally said the bride wore a gothic dress? By "not brushed" she probably meant a bat's nest. Teased big hair.

I vote with you on the squeaky gavel!

Me too-I vote with you and Peggy!

Yeeees ! A squeaky one please Charlotte !

Hahahhahahahah yes

I agree

I also got the impression that the guests either ignored the request for cocktail attire or they didn’t know what it meant. Those phrases seem to be falling out of use so it’s not that big a surprise. Disclaimer: I haven’t been invited to a wedding in a long time so I could be wrong.

I'm sorry but I don't understand what an unhygienic dress is.

@@louisejohnson6057 I meant a person can still look unhygienic or scumpy in a fancy dress, the dress doesn't necessarily make the whole appearance, sorry for the confusion (not a native English speaker 😅)

@@irgendwoaunid4048 oh, dirty clothes, I understand you now! Don't apologize, please, it's not necessary.

That was my thought EXACTLY.

Exactly. He's definitely in the right on how he feels. He's not TA

Yes, but only if he pronounces his daughter‘s name Spanish every time.

​@@BlueberryDragon13that's some critical information that was indeed left out! Is he pronouncing the daughters name as 'Róó-za Máá-ria' or 'Rouh-za Ma-ríía' - from how the guy posted his opinion, I'd bet it's the latter, which would be the anglicised way of saying it, which is not how the wife intended.

Then he should have not married a proud latina... he would have a heart attack had he married an italian or an italolatina 😅 we pronounce our names depending on mood 😂😂😂

​@@vickylovera88Or his wife could be respectful of his wishes because that IS his son as well. Being a proud Latin doesn't give her the right to disregard the other half of her child's blood line. 😝

I agree. My real given name is alien even to people from my dad's country and eventually had to settle with variants of Paul once I hit high school. I'm fine with it now, but it was obnoxious dealing with it as a kid.

I knew this woman, she married one of my closest friends, and I went and saw her shortly after the birth of their first child. Now I'd heard the child's name, but I'd never seen it written out. So I call the baby AMberley, she gets pissed off and tells me angrily that her name is EMberley, and informs me that Amberley sounds like a strippers name. She was an odd duck.

My friends did that too! They chose a different name in the end because everyone (from multiple backgrounds) pronounced the name very differently from the traditional pronunciation. I am glad they tried it out so the kid didn't have a lifetime of correcting people.

It sure is a tricky business, but I think this guy's story is not about that. He made it into this weird power thing over his wife, as if he has a problem with not only her accent but also her identity. Really weird shit, I feel bad for her.

I want all my daughters to have names that mean "Princess" because all of my daughters will be my little princesses. We're still deciding on how many total we want because it means a lot to me to have a big family and to adopt. I feel like after 3 pregnancies I won't want to carry again so we may adopt 2 children to make it 5. He wants a max of 4 and of course I want to make him happy. So maybe we'll have 2 biological children and then adopt 2. Who knows. Anyway god forbid we have 3 biological children and they are all girls, the names we decided on Sara which means princess in Hebrew, Kiara which means princess in Swahili and Maelie (pronounced like Miley Cyrus) which means princess in French. We'll probably do that for our last daughter.

There is a difference though. If I would take my bf’s last name (which is Martin lol) it would be pronounced in English as it is intended to, saying it in Spanish would be incorrect since it’s not “mar-teen” it’s “mart-inn”. The heritage thing is completely different than pronunciation

As soon as you said "mar-teen" I just *knew* you were talking about Fluffy and his introduction of his friend 'Mar-TEEEEEEEN" 🤣

@@drinaramirez6128 guess what Spanish speakers would still “mispronounce” the name, why? Because we don’t say it the way you say it, but honestly the husband was being too much Rosa and rose aren’t even the same name so he can’t use that as a comparison while Daniel and Daniel are the same name. You get used to people saying it differently and become a little more special

@@lunaxz36 i agree with the rose and Rosa not even being the same name, I think his example using that was incorrect. Plus he can pronounce Rosa without the Mexican accent, if he wants to. He wouldn’t be changing her name, just the pronunciation. I don’t think it’s a big deal that his wife pronounces Daniel that way, she isn’t breaking their deal. Daniel is still Daniel, it’s the name the sad chose. I think he has a problem with the whole heritage thing. Which as the original comment said, they should’ve talked about before doing other things

He’s probably whining because he can’t speak Spanish or roll his rs

That's when ya turn around and leave.

@@lubabe9969 I did not stay long. My boyfriend at the time was pissed that I left but I really wish someone told me everyone would be in jeans basically 😂

Better over than under, every single time.

That’s so annoying! I mean when you go to a wedding, by default you dress better than casual. Sorry you had to deal with that!

@Purple Citrine I love your sister's attitude !

@Purple Citrine I. Love. Her. Now THAT is how someone should be on their wedding day! 🐾

@Purple Citrine great sister! Hugs about the cake. We ordered my daughter wedding cake from our local Walmart and it actually was beautiful and it tasted lovely. Sorry your sister cake wasn't right.

@Purple Citrine I'm so glad it tasted nice. Im in charge of the grooms cake for my sons wedding. They wanted cupcakes luckily I have a good friend who does fancy baking for a reasonable price. They met playing pokemon go so the cup cakes are going to be pokemon themed. Not super fancy tho. We have tons of younger kids and teens so im hoping they go over well. To see an example Google pokemon cup cakes and the ones that are like an ice cream swirl on top with candy ears/face accents are the style lol. The kids wanted their big cake pokemon but her mom was like uh. Naw I don't think so but I got full permission to go pokemon on the cupcakes lol. Have a great day sweetie.🥰

It is better to be overdressed than underdressed. So, love go ahead and flaunt. Not to other but to yourself. Say, "Look me, I have such creative mind". I do not wear make up but my jewellery are always on point. I mean I love to wear matching accessories. Always. And I never miss. I blow my own mind like how I manage to pull that off. Few dresses (I meant dresses) back I wore a dress with 5 petal flowers because I found my old 5 petal earrings, matched it with 5 petal ring and found a locket in my sister collection to go with it. Guess what was the locket? Yes, 5-petal flower. All matched and in gold. I was so happy and proud. I showed it to everyone at work!!!!

I agree, one of my friends is named Daniel, but goes by Danielle since that is how it is pronounced where he is from, he got annoyed when people used Daniel rather than Danielle, because he didnt hear it as his name. The father in the video should have named him Daniel, not with the pronounciation Danielle, thus the wife calling him that is incorrect.

I would have to know if he pronounces his daughter's name the same way his wife does - Americanized or authentically Spanish. Betcha he says it the way he wants which makes him the A-hole.

I agree! She’s clearly doing it on purpose. And if the roles were reversed everybody would take the mother’s side.

@@bonniest.pierre2045 Betcha he does not, since he wouldnt be pissed in the first place if it is about karma Your "twitterself" is showing

@@bonniest.pierre2045 if you listened to what she said in the video, you would find out that he says the name correctly. He specifically said ‘I don’t call her Rose’ but Rosa Marie

Me to i was like is she cool

My bad, forgot to schedule this one 😂

@@CharlotteDobre Charlotte don’t be tardy 😂💚🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿

@@remove574 in my head, you pronounced her name like her grandmother did. Shar-LOTT!!!

@@JamesQMurphy hahahahahaha

100%

1000% wife the AH

100%

She's not, she has the right to give her son his ethnic inheritance.

​@@victoriacruz3610 she agreed to his choice and then changed it to suit herself. She being controlling and manipulative.

Me, too! Honestly, it kind of restores my faith in people a little. It also is evidence that maybe most of the shitty customers aren't die-hard Ksrens, they're just normal folks who had a bad day and lost their temper. It's still not okay to take out your crap on service professionals because you think you can get away with it, which is why I think OP's "prank" does indeed teach them a good lesson about the real harm they cause to another human being when they act like that. I do agree that the lesson might be too harsh, though, especially since some of these people might have serious personal reasons for the bad day. I worked a shitty receptionist job once where people were so awful that I struggled not to cry nearly every day I was there. One day, someone treated me so particularly badly that I nearly lost my own temper and lashed out. I'm so happy that I didn't! It turned out that he was in excruciating pain due to a health issue and wound up collapsing and needing an ambulance. You just never know with people. If someone might really be suffering in some way, is it really such a funny thing to load guilt on them for consequences beyond what their actions would even normally cause? I suggest doing the same skit but giving it a happier ending- have the "angry manager" let himself be convinced by the regret-filled customer. That way the lesson is learned but the customer leaves feeling like they made a mistake but were able to fix it and learn from it.

Seriously though, it's upsetting.

Nobody pronounces my name correctly! NOBODY. because its arabic name & I'm not an arab nor do I live in an Arab country. I feel like I've spent most of my life correcting people, asking them to say my name correctly. Most of them still can't. Now I don't care anymore. Pronounce it any way, I'm dead tired of correctly people!

People can't pronounce my name so I gave up a long time ago. I either let them pronounce it however they want or I provide them shortened versions/nicknames. It is just easier lol That's why I love going to Brazil, people say it exactly how it sounds. Love it.

That was my thought on the this one, too. She doesn't want them to have Anglicized names so she's being petty about it. (Both people are being a bit petty, but he is not the biggest A-hole here).

I have kinda the same phonemes duality with my name (Manuel) and I've never cared how's pronounced in neither of both languages... I think it's stupid to get mad at that, specially when the difference isn't that much (srsly, it's just accentuation, in english being "Da/Ma" the strong syllable at the begining whilst in spanish is "El" at the end)

I completely agree with this I would be rather upset if people started calling my child a name I did not give them. My name is Madeline but is pronounced like Madelyn cuz my parents aren’t so bright and don’t know how to spell. But now I just go by Maddie.

the lc US standerd "cocktail attire" is one step BELLOW "semiformal".

You keep repeating this. Do you mean to say that there are two different definitions in the US, depending upon one’s SES? Or are you trying to insult all Americans, but no one is taking the bait? If it is the former, you are correct, but I think it more formal than you understand, the latter then you picked the wrong forum. We’re all here just to watch her videos for fun. Nobody wants to argue or throw insults.

I LUV LUV LUV the coffee shop prank. There needs to be more, immediate consequences to being nasty. If you're making a server feel small and devalued, then you need to be called on it.

I wonder what happens if that customer returns and finds the employee still there and witnesses another "firing"?

Ooh, yes. I like this prank. Some AH's need to see what their actions may cause.

@@elewysoffinchingefeld3066 Might be too embarrassed to return to "the scene"

YES! And even if she had an accent, international names have a different pronunciation depending on the language. Making them each individual names. “Laura” pronounced in Finnish is not the same as “Laura” pronounced in English. Two different names. So to refuse to say somebody’s name the correct way just shows such disrespect and arrogance.

I agree, my name is Joanna (Polish heritage) pronounced Yo-anna, and I don't particularly like it when people call me Joanna in the English way, as my name is not English and I've grown up being called one way. I side with the father there as he clearly wanted to give a specific name to the son, and not have 2 different names! I would be extremely confused if i was the son growing up if both parents call me something different...

@@joannapoznanska2559 hey, at least they don't call you "Asia" as in the continenet, happened to a Joanna I know.

@@LookingForFrogs Ah, my parents do call me Asia/Joasia, and yes, the first time i saw it in writing i was confused, but the pronunciation is like Ah-sha

@@joannapoznanska2559 Oh, I am Polish, i know how Asia i pronounced in Polish, but it was a funny thing that happened to my friend when she was going to some student exchange program, she uses Asia in her social media, she was talking on messenger with people from that program, then when she arrived in UK everyone was like "oh, you must be Asia (like the continent)", and somehow even though she was quite good with English it never clicked to her it's the same spelling and it was really funny to her. I kind of had the same sudden realization while texting with my partner few day ago (neither of us is native, but we mostly communicate in English) how word "pies" (polish for a dog) is spelled the same as "pies" (more than one pie).

She's a teenager, not an infant, basic self-awareness isn't some super rare thing.

I don’t think that the prank is even a thing but I highly disagree with what you’re saying! They’re in high school and COLLEGE! They’re not 5 years old lol! You learn right from wrong, the feelings that come with doing something wrong etc. you learn those very young. You sound like someone justifying any and all bad actions because they’re kids lol! If a 14 year old gets pregnant, it’s not just like oh well of course she did! She’s just a child! What did you expect?! Or a 17 year old getting pulled over for driving drunk, well at 17 what did you expect? They’re so young! Age is age, it’s not an excuse to excuse certain situations and behaviors. Yes I do understand that the prefrontal cortex is not fully developed until 25, that is true. However! Being responsible for yourself and your actions happens far before that!

@@EnderSword Thinking that the prank may reinforce bad behavior when it has only has gotten good behavior for her isn't basic.

You know, teenagers deserve a hell of a lot more credit than we adults give them. Their understanding of the harsher realities of life may be limited, but they are definitely still capable of deep thought and introspection. Not to mention teens are often dealing with high levels of insecurity, so the concept of a teenager wondering if she went too far with what seemed like a harmless prank at the time isn't exactly groundbreaking. Just because they tend to hide their thoughts and feelings behind layers of sarcasm and defiance, doesn't mean that those thoughts and feelings aren't there.

@@giggle_snort absolutely!

*casual

Yeah exactly 💯 what's weird to me is that OP said in the invitation it was clearly labeled cocktail attire. Yet everyone else who got an invitation was dressed casually? I don't get it. How did everyone else there know they meant casual not cocktail? Maybe the invitation said the reception will be cocktails in the garden or something and OP took that to mean cocktail attire? Which is a fair assumption I would assume that too. I just don't get how literally no one else followed the dress code.

@@WhitneyDahlin maybe the other people saw the groom and bride more often and knew what they planned in detail.

@@laurafalsetti7178 Yeah, that's what I don't get. There was obviously a communications failure somewhere. Either OP didn't know them very well (in which case it really shouldn't matter unless she turns up in a full wedding gown because she's likely to be at the edge of things anyway so who cares) or there's more to the story. It's a little suss that she was talking right away about always needing to be done up, even for mundane affairs. I know many people feel that way and insecurity is a bitch, but there was a bit of a defensive vibe coming off that. I feel like maybe there was a little more context that was missing. Some of these AITA posts can get tricky that way, especially because we are only getting one side of the story. If it was a genuine mistake/miscommunication, then OP absolutely is NTA, these things happen and it would have been uncomfortable as hell to be that overdressed to a casual affair, I can empathise with that and then getting a bunch of abuse for the mistake would also be very upsetting. On the flipside, it could well just be that OP went over the top, the wedding guests might have been in nicer attire than they're letting on and they might have been - even if not purposefully - backing up their flamboyant wardrobe with attention seeking behaviour that deliberately placed them in the spotlight. Not saying that's what happened, because I just don't know. With only one side of the story, it's very hard to judge. Given the info available, it seems unreasonable to pile in on one person for wearing something nice and accusing them of trying to steal the spotlight.

Jell-o shots and keg stands made me laugh so hard I scared the dog.

That’s the issue isn’t it? That the bride and her family thought they could criticise their guest because they were upset- like, be upset but no need to harangue your guest/family member! 🙄

Indeed. I'm sorry but if you write "cocktail attire" and then the groom arrives with a tuxedo t-shirt..you don't know what cocktail attire means. 'Grace Kelly' was correct.

That's confusing since Ah-layna and Ellen-ah sound like two different names. Poor kid. That's kinda something you need to discuss when your kid is born We even had the discussion with my brother and ex-SIL how to pronounce my nephew Elijah's name when he was born

I agree!

I was just thinking that. An asshole who doesn't think she/he is an asshole would tell the story a little differently.

Absolutely. The way OP described what I picture to be a quite standard dramatic gothic dress and describes her hair as "unbrushed" (when goth style uses backcombed hair for volume a lot) made me very suspicious of her telling of the story. These posts should be taken with a grain of salt!

I saw someone else say here it was actually “ casual “ not cocktail and she just said that as she didn’t really pay attention and wore normal wedding attire. I personally think they should’ve just gone with black attire to fit the theme and not be “overdone”, but like to think the bride thought cocktail just essentially meant bar so that’s why they were dressed for a regular bar.

It could be a generational thing. If the OP is of an older generation, she dressed as she was taught what cocktail attire is. I would have dressed in the same style as she did. Also, it could have been a printer's mistake. The bride and groom most likely meant casual, but the invitation came back with cocktail.

Yeah we Asians never know this concept.

Even us African Arabians

Yup. I'm not going to show up at a wedding like I just left a frat party, my mother would've lost her mind! It's considered disrespectful to the bride and groom since we are expected to adhere to an unspoken dress code in SEA. The one we grew up knowing. My colleague once showed up in a football jersey and the side-eye he got was hilarious.

Well I've heard of crazy ladies wearing a wedding dress that would be bad form but dressing your best is not and should be expected

Yup i agree...upstaging is a concept which we are unaware of in India too. I have seen many married ladies flaunting their own wedding lehenga or saree at their relative's wedding functions...and its totally normal here.

I know it’s 8 months since you commented this but I just needed to say- THANK YOU! Say it louder for the people in the back!

@@britnymichelle4245 yes! I agree. I agree with the husband. The kid could get confused too.

Yea it's a pretty common disagreement to have with 1st, 2nd, and 3rd generation immigrants actually idk why reddit dubbed him the AH.

@@8701sara same like she said she could say it right but shes just not

I posted this somewhere else but I gotta disagree. My parents say my name with different accents (one is Indian and and the other is Indian American) and they respect each other’s pronunciation. My dad definitely doesn’t throw a fit just because my mom says my name in midwestern accent, and my mom respects my dad’s wish to embrace out heritage. Just feels like he is being immature about it. It’s a literal vowel, get the fuck over it

I agree because I read in that post the she can say Daniel without an accent with other friends named Daniel so I think she is doing it on purpose.

Hmmm, is the Dad secretly upset that his son's name sounds feminine?

The wife just doesn't respect her husband, there is nothing less nor more

I think, that too is what he tried to convey with his transcribed spelling. That he wants the first syllable to be stressed, and she stresses the last and palatalises the l.

Yeah, people are notoriously bad at explaining pronunciation in text 😅 this was my guess of the issue as well

Especially if she doesn't have a Mexican accent like he said, the Spanish Daniel in a random sentence will sound like Danielle

Take a bow this is hilarious.

Honestly, not the a-hole. They came at you, being rude, they deserve to be put in their place. Fact is: maybe you didn't have cancer, but someone DID. Someone has lost a great amount of weight from cancer. If this is how they treat YOU just for being thin, they'll treat all thin people like that, including someone who had cancer. My main problem with being thin is having my food orders consistently disrespected. For example, I order iced capps made with chocolate milk, instead of cream. It's less calories that way, but it also just genuinely TASTES BETTER. Even if it was more calories, I'd still prefer the chocolate milk. The amount of times I've had an overweight barista look me up and down with a scowl, and proceed to make it with cream, it's just enraging. It's gotten to the point where I will just order a different drink that I like the "high calorie" variant more because I don't want to deal with the hassle of having my drink remade. Note that it's not a "too busy" mistake. My daily schedule puts me at a time where I get my drink when it's not busy at all. If there IS a line, I simply leave because I don't want to wit in a line, and an iced capp isn't a NEED it's a treat. I just shrug it off and go "bad luck, maybe next time" I mean, if it was an occasional "oopsie" I wouldn't assume. But they hear me say "mocha iced capp, replace the cream with chocolate milk" and they look up, and eye me up and down, and scrunch their nose. I SEE them glance at me, analyzing my weight. And it's not just me, family member and friends who are thinner also have their "low calorie" or "fad diet" alterations (such as using non-dairy milk) blatantly disrespected after also getting the Scowl of Judgement.

@@jadecoolness101 I’m fat, no need to sugarcoat it and call myself fluffy or some of the other shit some people do, and this kind of shit pisses me off. Some women are obese due to health issues that they can’t control, but I believe the majority of us are obese because we love to eat and don’t work out enough to burn off those excess calories. Shaming someone who is thin is just as unacceptable as trashing someone for being overweight. I’ve known people that COULDN’T gain weight no matter what they ate. I’m sorry that you are treated that way. People forget easily that body positivity encompasses all bodies.

@Kales, I was the opposite. I am obese and when I was a little smaller and in my 20s I worked at Aeropostale. I had to wear mostly the men’s clothing because a lot of the women’s clothing at the time didn’t fit. It was frustrating because the clothing at the plus size store barely fit (I think I was a size 14 or 16 at that time?), but clothing at other stores were too small most of the time. I had very little customer interaction as it was a VERY part time job I had to help supplement the pay from my full time job. A job is a job and any jerk who treats you as less than because you’re thinner than them is no better than people who are jerks to them for their weight. You didn’t deserve that treatment and I’m sorry that you went through that.

@@susieq1279 i don't care if someone is a little chunky though tbh. Life is too short to spend hours in the gym just to be 5 pounds lighter. I can buy into body positivity when it still pertains to health. You can have a bit of extra cushion and still be completely healthy. Morbid obesity causes damage to the body by straining the heart and joints, THAT is not healthy. To be honest, I don't like 'gym culture' at all. I am very thin in areas that most people see, like the neck, wrists, arms, legs. Heck, I'm almost underweight and I AM working to gain a little. However I, like many women, still don't have a "flat stomach." I was actually severely underweight at one point in my life, and STILL didn't have a flat stomach. I didn't have an eating disorder or anything, at least not consciously, it was just finding time to eat was hard because of university courses. I'm okay now though, in a healthy weight range, just want a little more to be safer lol. But the point is, that I've also seen thin women like myself with a stomach pouch be shamed for talking about it. Like, fatter women will claim that thin women are "trying to also be oppressed" or whatever. But gym culture really does put a lot of focus on having a flat stomach to be deemed a "healthy weight" or a "healthy body." "Everyone's body is built differently" is true, but "built differently" pertains to where fat is deposited on your body, not how much you have overall. I can end with a fun fact: Greek Goddesses were considered very beautiful, and they didn't have completely flat stomachs.

Congrats on a year of the dragon daughter who loves your name!!! I'm 33 too; Rune sounds awesome

@@cheapskatepanic Thank you!

I agree. I'm 36 and a Stefanie, one of two or three in any given class while growing up. I wouldn't even turn when someone shouted my name in the hallway, it was so common. I love my name but Rune is so unique! Good job ❤️

A good old norse name, but mostly given to boys. Love it though 🤩

See my reply a few above

Coffee-on-fire exists. kzfaq.info/get/bejne/qrWdfJZ6tq3Xp2w.html

And customer service.

I couldn't agree more. I was a customer service manager for 20 years in retail. I would have loved to been able to pull this off. I would have been laughing so hard too that I'm not sure I could have kept a straight face. lol

LOUDER FOR PEOPLE IN THE BACK!!! I've worked in customer service for almost half my life now, and it never changes. Not ok!

Ditto. I'm an American living in Korea. My husband is Korean. Our kids have both Western and Korean names we use pretty equally. I KNOW we don't pronounce the other's language correctly, even our own kids' names. It has never been an issue between us. Although, pronunciation was a consideration when we named them, mostly mine since I'm the foreigner here.

@@totesmegoatscrystal9688 thank youuu! I think she intentionally fucks it up because she thinks it’s a “white” name! It was his choice, and she needs to respect his choice

@@eveningstar8581 agreed.

Agreed. NTAH !

@@totesmegoatscrystal9688 I love your daughter name. Very pretty, and I totally agree with you.

Exactly. NTAH

It’s not Danielle, it’s Daniele that is an Italian/Spanish male name!

@@lambruscopopcorn9431 And that nuance will be completely lost on almost everyone in the culture this kid will grow up in. This is a mini culture war in this family and the wife is cheating on the rules to make a point against her husband. Unacceptable.

well maybe the son won't like it the way his dad pronounces it?

@@crystalh450 Except they're not pronouncing it Danielle. But agree - the mom is exploiting a loophole in their agreement and has admitted that the reason is to avoid anglicizing, which was the reason they had the agreement in the first place.

Agreed. They agreed they both got to name a kid and personally I think that includes the way it's supposed to be pronounced. Is it a huge deal? Nah. Is it a bit silly? Sure. But if they both agreed to something, both should keep their promise. And when it comes to accents (even though that's clearly not the issue here) I feel like it's mainly about effort. I have a name that isn't really found outside of my country. My Taiwanese friend has some trouble pronouncing my name, so it usually comes out wrong, but at least she tries to get it right and that's all that matters to me.

White tie??? You mean black tie??

She said 'more extreme requests'.Black tie is common. You can look up white tie dress code.

@@melaniehickman5389 White tie is different from black tie although both are formal.

@@melaniehickman5389 I think they meant white tie. White tie is like a tier above black tie, it's even more formal than black tie.

We can be friends ❤

I thought the same thing. If the roles were reversed everybody would have a problem with it.

I think the reason for that is because you can feel he is ashamed of his Hispanic heritage and making a big deal of how the pronunciation in Spanish is bothering him. I'm considering him the A-hole until he realizes what he is doing, but I'm also blaming it on her for marrying him knowing this. He is trying to Americanize them and it doesn't look good on his part.

@@jessica1lopez He's trying to Americanize them? Did you not read the part about how they are American? He is third generation, native to the country, and she immigrated as a young child and speaks English with an American accent. They both have American accents and they both normally pronounce "Daniel" the way Americans do. She is going out of way to pronounce their sons name differently than she would normally pronounce "Daniel". So this situation is the exact opposite of what you are saying. And the wife is the AH, not the OP.

@@amandadee412 not really. if a woman did it, the situation wouldve still been the same. reddit isnt THAT stupidly biased, you know haha

@@dione__fernnn it definitely can be. The mom is doing it and nobody is saying anything. The father doesn’t purposely say the daughter’s name wrong… the mother does.