I was an alcoholic for 11 years, age 20-31 and now sober 1.5 years. When I admit it and tell people I am a recovering alcoholic they dismiss it. My family especially will try to convince me I can still drink and I was never an alcoholic. Those same people also judged me for drinking too much. I was fighting this lonely battle everyday and still fighting. I thank God for pulling me out of it. I pray for those who are fighting this battle, I pray they find the help and support to fight this.🙏🏼

The problem with alcohol not to mention the deadly withdrawal is that there's a dealer 10 minutes down the road in any direction you go.

My dad died due to alcohol. He was a successful doctor. He retired, divorced, my mom got so sick of it and he would hide bottles all around the house. He was the best dad tho. I am now suffering from that and struggling... Thank you

Alcohol-Cunning, Baffling, Powerful. I was in denial for decades. As a high performing alcoholic, no one else questioned my drinking. I didn’t drink from a brown paper bag while wearing a trench coat. I’m like 80% of alcoholics-right in your midst suffering from a cruel disease. Thankfully I got help and now have over 13 years of sobriety.

I 8months sober and finally starting to be aware how clearly I can see and feel life

I am an alcoholic from across the sea. An American. This hit heavily. Thank you to the speaker for your bravery in addressing this heavy subject. It is a beacon of hope for someone as lost as I. I wish you the best.

Your father's death was not in vain. You are doing such an amazing thing in his honour. May your message reach billions.

I never hid a bottle in a brown paper bag, I never wore a faded old raincoat or lived on the street. But I was an alcoholic and I’ve been a recovering alcoholic for sixteen years. The stereotypes are alive and well.

I have been struggling with alcoholism and ptsd for nearly 30 years. Yesterday was 90 days sober for me and I have been grappling with morbid and depressing thoughts- the same thoughts that fueled my alcoholism for all of those years. I can relate to everything you said, and have empathy for your father. Thank you for making such a beautiful and eloquent video. It brought tears to my eyes and has given me some hope and acceptance. Your video helped this alcoholic stay sober today.

Not being able to tell anyone one I was an alcoholic. That is the one thing that kept me in my addiction, my nightmare of a cycle or alcohol and drug abuse. I felt like I couldn’t tell anyone because they would disown me. Judge me, treat me like a criminal, a deadbeat. Now I look at my past as a blessing for other people I may be able to help.

Thank you for this. It’s so true. My heart goes out to you. My husband is the sweetest, smartest, compassionate, loyal, hard-working, high-functioning man I’ve ever known (besides my own dad), but he’s an alcoholic. He has FINALLY suffered life threatening consequences of his alcohol use that landed him in the hospital on 5/26/22. He had a Mallory-Weiss tear which caused intestinal bleeding and the vomiting of large amounts of blood. He was jaundiced on top of it, very weak, and very tired. They found out he had/has alcoholic hepatitis and possibly cirrhosis, but we won’t know for about 6 months as his liver is too inflamed to see the damage just yet. He’s done so well with withdrawal and now he’s getting physical rehab therapy to get stronger after 8 days in ICU and another week in general medical. He’s doing so well and he’s committed to abstaining from alcohol. I’m committed to abstinence as well. I wasn’t a big drinker to begin with since hangovers kill me. But I will do anything to help him. To everyone out there reading this, please be advised about how dangerous alcohol can be. It’s too easily available and it’s one of the most fatal drugs on this planet. Please be careful and learn to recognize the signs of someone with potential alcoholic liver disease so you can ask them if they need help. One of the signs I learned about (a bit too late) were my husband’s bright red palms! He tried to tell me it was from typing on his keyboard for work (he works in IT). I believed him, but I later found out it’s a sign of liver disease. Now that he’s getting medical care, his palms are no longer red. He’s 15 days without alcohol and he’s got a new outlook on life. He’s been drinking way too much for 20+ years. He’s 40 years old, but this whole crisis might’ve actually saved his life if we can get his liver to heal by removing alcohol permanently and changing our diets/increasing our activity. My condolences to anyone who’s lost a family member to alcohol. ♥️

I’m an alcoholic who in the next 3-4 weeks should be in residential detox (God willing). This video and others like it really help. Thank you

I’m an alcoholic, a dad, has a family who loves me and my name is Steve. The only difference here is that I stopped *just* before I died. I was a severe drinker - 24/7, vodka straight from the bottle, food was of no interest. I love sobriety these years and one good reason I finally quit for good is that I came to understand, after my last encounter with acute alcohol withdrawals, delirium tremendous and hallucinations, that if I am ever to drink again I will die. There is no doubt in my mind. None. I touched death, I was so close to it the last time. So I continue to live a sober life. Thank you for this talk, it so easily could have been me. I’m very moved by what you said.

This is so true. I have struggled w alcohol and have family members who still judge me even though I’m in recovery, meanwhile, they are overweight and addicted to junk food. It doesn’t make sense.

I am an alcoholic, and I'm figthing to be sober. Still haven't figured out yet. But thanks for this amazing video, it made me feel understand for a moment

Im drinking a beer while watching this… i know i need to change and it’s why I’m here.

I've been sober for almost 10 years. What you said is absolutely 100% true. I wish everyone knew this.

44 years of my life, my dad is slowly killing himself. I'm in tears that video I just heard, is exactly how things are, it's to the T, we have spoken to my dad given him support, he has 5 grandchildren, hopefully he'll see them grow up. But his alcohol has got the best of him. We preparing ourselves for that unexpected , not waking up in the future morning, it's breaking me down, we can't tell anyone that the cause is alcohol, we pray everyday that he will stop, his only 68 years old.

I'm an alcoholic and I decided this month that I am done with it. I want to be around in the future for my kids.

I sought help from doctors and psychiatrists, I took medication, I went to anyone medically inclined to help. It didn’t work. It’s not a medical problem. It’s a spiritual problem. Medicine can help. But the medical community doesn’t know how to fix us. AA saved my life. It’s a spiritual disease as much as a medical one. I appreciate what she is saying.

I discovered how mentally messed up I am after my relapse a year ago, I had 8 years of sobriety prior, I’m doing my best everyday

I am only 23 years old and I suffer with alcoholism. I swear every morning I tell myself I want to stop but at night I feel that I need it. I want to stop but it so hard because at the same time it’s the only thing that brings me happiness and relief from the outside world. I don’t understand why I need it tbh but my body demands it. It’s a constant cycle and I really wish it would stop I just don’t know how to stop it when it’s the only thing that gives me a reason to stay alive everyday as horrible as that sounds it’s true.

"Have you ever stereotyped an alcoholic- me:"yes" and just now admitting I'm an alcoholic. Speaks strong.

I needed this...thank you, I have felt alone in my struggle with alcohol. Much of society brushes it off. I have always been felt I am just too weak and insignificant to care about. I have separated myself from relationships for too long because I never wanted anyone to see my weaknesses. I need help, and need to be strong enough to take it. I think being honest with yourself is the 1st step

Great talk. I am an alcoholic in the UK and I am currently getting treatment. Because I don't fit the profile of a stereotypical alcoholic my partner did not believe I was addicted and thought I can just stop. I decided I needed treatment and done it anyway, I am so pleased I did. Bless your father. X

I appreciate this talk so much. I needed to hear this as an encouragement to continue advocating for my own father who is an alcoholic. I have the same story and this has renewed my commitment to keep encouraging him to seek professional/clinical help to beat this. He has so much to live for.

After 25+ years, I sought help for the 'New Year'. An online program with 12 hours a week of group and individual therapy. The women in the group are bright, talented, warm and engaging...caring souls. They come from a trauma background, family violence & abuse as children. At 57, I am the oldest in the group and I'm so glad for these ladies that they are seeking help earlier than I did. Sad that this gentleman felt he could not get help.

Such a beautiful story that explains stigma in such a sad but eye opening way! I’m 1 year sober. And my journey is to stop the stigma towards alcoholism and help more people suffering survive.

It's hard to have compassion for the man who was abusive to my family for years. He chose alcohol over his family. I have compassion for others struggling with alcoholism but not my father. He used it as a tool to abuse us and refused treatment

I watched this today which happened to be the 4 year mark of your fathers passing. RIP. Thank you for sharing.

Amazing well done Sarah! So many are blind and quick to judge thank you for speaking out.

I relate to this so much, May God give us the grace to keep fighting and start Living. Amen.

Great video. 👍 I am dependent, I did 7 months sober, then drank for a month then seeked help again and am now over 1 month sober again. Sorry for your loss x

To your question...yes. And, I am an alcoholic myself...only 24 days sober. I am now faced with treatment, DCF, etc...My dependency on alcohol was slow. Don't think it won't happen to you. I have been lucky enough to not have withdraw symptoms. My husband is a heavy drinking alcoholic with liver issues and type 1 diabetes. I know he won't get help. Even though we might lose our kids if he doesn't stop.

Sober alcoholic here, going to write about this video for a class. For a lot of my drinking career I knew there was a problem but was far too ashamed to discuss it. Thanks for the talk!

For me, AA was absolutely useless, what worked was meditation and learning to quiet my mind, along with running and working out.

I got the courage to share about my story regarding the alcoholic family who caused terrible damage in my family. It's time to speak UP!!!

I know its killing me, i can feel it, every night with randomness, every morning with a sickness. And how my body is responding to it in my mid 30's. Its not fun i can tell you that. But its such a flip side of a coin. It numbs the pain of the day during the night before but in the morning you are sick and have to re live it again. An endless cycle of sickness, suffering, anf misery.

I'm adopted by a wonderful family who drinks quite a bit but always control themselves and have never struggled with addiction. I've struggled with alcohol addiction for 16 years. A few months ago I learned of my biological father and siblings, and it turns out they all struggle with alcoholism also. There has to be a genetic aspect to alcoholism.

I have a gift for writing and that talent keeps me away from trouble. It keeps my spirit high. Both my father and stepfather were drunks that didnt give two shits about their family. People dismiss alcoholism like its something harmless but it destroys everything.

I’m the same daughter… but for (I now know) the same reasons followed his steps… I’m drunk as I write this and still don’t know how to help myself… my apologies for dropping this. I don’t dare commit myself in fear of what people will say… I don’t even know why I write this. I suffer immensely and try to hide it. FYI I’m a functioning alcoholic. But the functioning is becoming less and less… that’s all from me.

Both you and your dad are helping to erase the stigma of alcoholism with this talk. Know that it lands and will continue to do so.

Answering your question: Yes! I have stereotyped alcoholics. And because of that, it took me some time to seek help. I'm sober since 9th of August, 2021 ♥️ Never been homeless, never fit any stereotype. Being a Brazilian woman partying was my excuse. Edit: My das was also an alcoholic, he passed away yesterday. My dad died at the age of 66y old. The expectage of life where I live is, for a man like him, 77 y old. The man people called Brito (his last name) was a hard working man, a good provider, a kind soul, and eventually he became a drunk. The man I called dad was nothing but love. At some point of his life he was curious about being sober, and I shared my experience with him, but he never seeked help, if he seeked, I wasn't aware. The society condeemed his acts when drunk, but also enabled him. I'm not saying he was innocent, but for me, he was just my dad. The man who loved me more than anything, and I love him back, always will.

Thank you for sharing your story Sarah, extremely brave and I am so sorry to hear you lost your dad. I identified with so much you spoke about I sadly lost my dad August 2011 to alcohol addiction and only now am I learning to speak about it as like you it wasn’t spoken about and not to tell anyone it was a secret for years. I was also worried if I told people it was alcohol that killed him that he would be judged and stereotyped and as you say they are so much more than the disease. There needs to be so much more help for those suffering and also less judgement from society towards those suffering so they feel able to seek help. X

My grand dad died to alcoholism and I know I'm going down the same path. I drink every day and I'm only 20 years old. I always wake up saying to myself I'm not gona drink today but the more awake I get its like the more I want it. And I always end up finally giving in. I wouldn't wish this on anyone and I pray that everyone here can get the help they need

I started drinking when I was 12, tried to quit around age 22 and couldn't. I battled the urges and giving in for 10 years until I gave my life to Jesus. Been sober ever since with not one craving. About 7 years now. All glory to God.

Im a recovering alcoholic at 20 and im really struggling today. My family drink wine around me at night and still get blamed for the families problems. I need to get out My family home they just love to push my buttons i can be suicidal around them i try to tell them how i feel and think but they just give out when im trying to tell them how i think and feel. Its drives me nuts. I cant change them and they cant change me and im really struggling today

I’ve been an alcoholic since I was 12. Over 23 years now. My dad died slowly over 4 years of lymphoma and the night of his funeral I drank a half a bottle of scotch that was in his liquor cabinet. I’m not saying that my dads death was solely responsible for where I am now. I’m simply saying that life can get in the way. I’m lucky I’ve got a wife who loves me and can see past my addiction.

An alcoholic is not seeking for acceptance but living a life that was predetermined by childhood. I love to indulge in alcohol because it eases the hardship of life itself. Maybe I forgot how to live a sober life or whether alcohol cleanses my emotions, either way we all have coping mechanisms that define how we navigate through it. My dad was an alcoholic and smoker for most of his life and he managed to clean himself up. Having a structured life does not mean the tendency to succumb to alcohol is less likely a factor. On the contrary, the more your push way the need for alcohol, the greater force it comes back. What you need is a REPLACEMENT for alcohol. Something that distracts you and puts your focus on something more productive and rewarding. I hope all the best for you!

I really do appreciate this video and I am very sorry for your loss. I also lost my Dad who died due to car accident by implementing his own suicide. My Dad was an amazing man and a father, son and uncle. People do drink for various reasons and in my Dad's case was a narc abuse from my mother. I saw him suffering and in pain and feeling hopeless about her personality disorder. He would drink himself to numb the pain. The words can not describe what I was experiencing as a child. The point that I would like to make is that we as a society are responsible for this stigma and needs to be fight against it. My heart goes to everyone who experienced this disorder.

The worst thing I ever heard was that "if you had any shame you'd just stop drinking". I am filled with shame, wracked with it. The lack of understanding, the idea that i somehow deserved it. That i deserved to be near death and in such a miserable state. That hurt, that wound, was worse than anything that drove me to drink in the first place.

I empathise alcoholics but it's really hard to keep feeling compassion for a family member who is on a path of self destruction and repeatedly abuses their loved ones who do everything to try to help them. No apologies, no remorse, just constant gas lighting those who've tried to help them

So clear message. Today was the last day at a detox camp. Still I fear what if I relapse. Please pray for me.

absolutely the most accurate presentation on alcohol that I've ever heard. I've been trying to say this my whole whole life. I'm sure to lose my life soon from drinking andI don't know a single person to share my learned knowledge with. 1) alcohol is far far more addictive than non-alcohol abusive people think 2) you are far from the person you were before after you drink. It doesn't magnify your personality. (That may be the most ridiculous assumption about alcohol). 3) you don't come come back usually... Unfortunately the alcohol tends to get you before your brain is ready to accept death. My takeaways but chances are you'll leave it rather than take it unfortunately. Truth hurts but alcohol does more.

Condolences to you Sarah on the loss of your father. Your talk was very astute and insightful and will help many, many countless people around the world who hear it. Thank you.

Thank you to all who have shared their life experience! Social judgement is so destructive! Love and support is the only answer! Never give up! We all have the potential to change!🌱

I couldn't get two minutes into rhis without tearing up prayer for you dad

This was beautiful my dad was an alcoholic whose beat the disease and I’m currently struggling from it thank you for helping my situation feel normal ❤️

I was drinking for 40 years. Still struggling to stop. But this speach opened up a new pathway, to stop this Alcoholism. New realized the its stigma and how it changed my personality from normal to a kings personality, which I never had. The malfunction of my brain functioning. Hope to stop drinking with this realization after hearing this talk. I felt, this is my story, she is talking about. I don't want to end my story, as Sarah's fathers. Thanks Sarah. God bless your mission.

Thank you for sharing. A really well delivered talk.

I stereotyped up until I became one. I'll never do it again.

Thank you for this talk & spreading awareness.Sorry for your loss.xx

This is a horrible disease destroying many. These videos help me tremendously when I am at the end of my rope with my alcoholic husband. It never gets better

Very powerful and moving.I so agree with you. Keep going.Let’s all get better at undoing alcohol harm.

Quite informative and powerful. Thanks for sharing this.

My boyfriend is suffering from AUD… It’s gotten worse, and it’s harder because we’re long distance. I’ve been more easily agitated- and I haven’t been able to talk to him because he’s too drunk to text me back a lot of the time. I want to help him. I want to be a comfort to him. Thank you for this. I don’t think I’ve been the best girlfriend- I’ve been misinformed on alcoholism severely. Thank you.

Beautifully said. Thank you.

Such an amazing talk, well done Sarah x

My partner had been hiding it from me and I didn’t find out till well into our relationship that it was a problem.. I’m trying to be supportive and understand his journey a little more.. At the same time, he had all this support from his groups and both of our family’s. Yet I have nobody to helping/supporting me through this.. I needed to hear this Ted talk.

Very powerful talk about the truth. I want to help change that in my area and will. Thanks and very sorry for your loss.

The day I stopped drinking was the day I broke the spirit of alcoholism in the name of Jesus the Son of God, the King of the Universe and commanded it to be GONE. I tried literally EVERYTHING else, including AA, which I still attend. But without the power of the Son of God, I was never, ever able to heal. I feel like someone needs to hear this.

My mother and myself were in the fellowship thank you for your friendship and example.. I was a high functioning until I couldn’t function this disease kills ❤

Very moving Sarah, thank you - my dad was one too, but no one ever spoke about it xx

I'm struggling with depression alcoholism and diabetes sucks..

Wonderful talk, thank you so much! The stigma is still as strong and I too find myself avoiding health care because of fears of being seen as a weak nuisance. Most people still hold this belief, myself included at times. I wonder if future generations will be able to handle this better and I am unsure how it all will end for me, a person with alcohol use disorder. I am much opener and more outspoken than your father was, all my friends and family know, but I still do not truly get my needs met or any meaningful way of help. At best, I get accepted for being broken, which is definitely more than your dad received, so the awareness is increasing, however slow and reluctant it may be. I also have enablers around me and they refuse to accept having any part in my condition, they are also not interested in family therapy, just a wall of non-help, really. So I wonder: how am I supposed to achieve sobriety this way? I really cannot, I feel.

Beautiful homage to Steve, Sarah. Thank you for posting.

really good way of going against the stigma, great talk

Thank you for your story

Thank you. I needed this video.

Thankyou. What a wonderful thoughtful insightful talk. ❤

It's Okay to Cry...You Are a Brave Beautiful Sweet Woman. Thank You for Sharing.

You are the most amazing person and got so much out of this.

You are amazing this talk may have saved me x

Love this. Really spoke to me.

Thank you. This was amazing.

Hello and Thank You Sarah Drage. You are my hero. To be able to see thru the addiction and understand the shame and guilt we recovering alcoholics carry around. Your excellent comparisons to other additions which lead to illness such as smoking, overeating, controlling narcisstic behavior, mental illnesses and the list goes on. Please do add to this list! No one chooses to be an alcoholic. The question is often asked Nature or Nuture? I would like to hear others opinion. In my world most people give lip serve to"oh, its an illness" Really!!! I've never known a illness to carry such a stigma ( maybe AIDS). I am looking for understanding not forgiveness. I'm so sorry about your Father and I agree the stigma of alcoholism was the killer. How many more decades will alcoholics die from being stigmatized? Sarah, you would make a wonderful advocate for a campaign to educate the public and dissolve the discrimination and stigma related to alcoholism. I for one would gladly join you and Im sure there would be many others. Thank you for speaking out.

Thank you.

Thank you for this thoughtful speech. God Bless and rest your Dad. My Father was an alcoholic. He was also a World War II vet. After my Sister and I saw the movie, "Saving Private Ryan, " my Sister said, "No wonder Dad drank!" He saw horrors I will never witness. He died 5 days before his 68th birthday. He had quit drinking 11 years before he died, but by that time his organs were shot. I love him immensely and miss him to this day. By the way, he also refused to get help. Why wouldn't he go to AA? He said, "I'm not like those people." I'm sure AA has people from all walks of life. Nonetheless, he couldn't bring himself to go.

I'm living with an alcoholic. He doesn't want help. I don't think it's a matter of shame, I think he just wants to drown in beer. I've given up offering help and support, it's been 30 years. Sometimes he's so messy and mean. His health is terrible. I don't feel responsible but I don't appreciate the blame. What am I supposed to do that hasn't been done?

Alcohol is a a f*****g joke I’ve been been drinking since I was 16 I’m now 26 and can’t stop

I don’t like admitting my sister was an alcoholic I want her to be remembered as the lovely kind clean and organised person she really was.

I was a heavy drinker in my 30s so I suppose you could say I was an alcoholic. Then my 40s got here and I met a true alcoholic that needed a hospital to detox who was rock bottom and who is insane thinks everyone should cater to her. It's because of meeting her its very rare I drink at all. A 12 pack of beer will last me an entire month

Apples, ripe apples, we'll pick from the trees, But cider - no cider for us, if you please. Grapes, purple grapes, for your eating and mine, But we'll turn down our glasses where pours the red wine. Barley, fresh barley, we'll welcome as bread, But when made into beer it is poison instead. We'll enjoy all the good things God maketh to grow, When men change them to poisons, we'll bravely say, "No."

Wonderful video and i thank you

Thank you

Still a very beautiful and relevant ted talk Sarah. Well done ❤

Also an alcoholic has a different reaction to other heavy drinkers. Some people who drink heavy are still not alcoholics and that's why they can function and carry on with their drinking. An alcoholic has an urge and a reaction to alcohol that goes way beyond the norm of much of society. So it's not the same thing for others. As it is for the alcoholic. You are a beautiful person and daughter for this btw. So gracefully and intelligently spoken. Your dad would be proud. Thanks for trying to educate people because you're spot on. It needs to be treated as a disease. Not punished as a moral judgement. Fact is that I am not a functional alcoholic. I'm a very non functional alcoholic. That's why I'm homeless too now. Still I can't seem to stop. Lost my wife. Access to my son. Well, because of the sheer distance between us. 15,000 miles. Lost my job. Everything. All gone. Yet just now I'm trying to get into rehab. I get that there are different types of alcoholics. But yeah, I did control it once. For quite a fair few years. I just lost control of it and how it affects me and yeah, I definitely cannot function when I'm drinking. So even other alcoholics judge me. Coz it sends me crazy. You'd think I could stop because of how I become when I drink more easily in fact. But it's still a huge struggle and seems impossible. I didn't always drink like this. But I do now. Fact is, it stops me feeling anxiety. Even though it always goes too far and becomes too much for me. It still helps in some way. And yet I have no other alternative to treat that anxiety. Because I can't get anti anxiety medication and even the anti depressants I found that help my anxiety they are trying to prevent me having because I also take anti psychotic medication which can cause long term negative side affects mixed with SSRIs. So yeah, I just gotta face this anxiety now. No other choice. The alcohol will be the death of me if I don't. There's stigma for all sorts of reasons in society. Stigma is a problem for many different reasons. It isn't helping. It is making things worse, that is right. It prevents people getting better. And all the while, we are told we must but denied treatment because of stigma by the very same people treating it, even. It's absurd.

No one gets the shame. When you start admitting your problem, and that you’re sorry, but you’re intoxicated at that moment, but wanna get better, you’re bombarded with scolds…it sucks

I am an alcoholic Thanks for letting me feel I'm not alone

I've been saying for years that alcohol is a dangerous drug.