🔍: Am I the Genius? 🟢Spotify & all Podcast platforms

Oh, shame. The one about the mom and the life policy was so sad. Yeah, addiction doesn't just mess up the addicts life but the effects ripple throughout the whole family system and, ultimately, society. OP is such a strong person to have taken on that role and kept it a secret from the sister.

My mom is completely deaf in 1 ear. We were running around town doing errands when my cell rang, I was placing bags in the trunk and asked mom to answer it. It was a male stripper that I was dating. He asked if we could meet that night since I was leaving out of the country for 2 weeks, he proceeded to tell me everything he was planning on doing to me before I left. All I said was, I'm kind of busy, but I can make time and hung up. Mom very casually says I can watch my grandson while you go out and get laid. I yelled, OMG mom, I thought you couldn't hear!!! She laughed and said, I'm deaf in the right ear, the left hears everything!

like how i hear in one of the stories a mom died and i just see squidward doing sick flips on a skateboard

That "throwing the baby across the room" is both sad and hilarious, still, no one ever tell that kid they were thrown across a room

The story about the shy, affectionate three year old was just adorable.

I don't disapprove of the way the flip cam parent handled it but I also feel like a "taking explicit videos of yourself as a minor is a felony" conversation needed to be had. Just for future reference.

“That’s not what the cat is for.” 🤣

I don't think there is anything about myself that my mom hasn't already told me. There are things I really SHOULDN'T know that she told me anyway. I had a younger sibling that was a miscarriage when I was 1 year old. My mom literally blamed me for causing the miscarriage cause she was leaning over the railing to my crib to take care of me when she suddenly stopped feeling the baby moving inside her. My older brother once beat me with a rake in the back yard, hitting me so hard it actually broke the rake and I was covered in my own blood. I have no memory of this happening but it does partially explain all the body pain and nerve damage I still suffer from. I was like 2 or 3 at the time. There's a lot of stuff I can't actually remember and probably shouldn't know that my mother just openly talks about like it's not an issue as if it's not super traumatizing instead of getting me into therapy. But this is all apparently just a "normal" part of growing up to her.

There are a few stories in here about choices to protect now-adult children from guilt. And I'm glad to find these. I'm glad other people feel the same about such issues as I do because honestly it always felt like I was wrong to worry about the effects of such things. ""A person should know how their actions hurt others." I was always taught. But my question was, why? at least in some cases. What would it accomplish to ruin another life, and in the worst case, yes, indirectly end it, for the sake of 'fairness' over something that a person once had no control over, or absolutely did not intend to happen? The life insurance, and slightly less so, the cat one are perfect examples of how guilt could only end badly.

I love how half these stories are sad and horrific and the other half are hilarious.

Teaching your kids to play poker so you can learn their tells is some next level iq shit 😂

About the roadkill cat, during cold weather cats will sometimes sleep on top of the front wheel, concealed underneath the car. Drivers are advised to tap the hood of the car before starting it so they'll wake the cat.

Nice to see Squidward ripping thug2 to shreds

"My teen daughter writes spicy fan fics" " I'm a liberal mom and okay with a healthy way of viewing the deed" majority of spicy fan fics are far from a healthy view

To the parent of Story 16: Don’t stop doing this (within reason). Most likely, this will encourage him to be witty and find better jokes and stories, which will make him funnier in real life! Don’t encourage anything he says that’s awful/dangerous/etc. so he’ll also learn boundaries, but encourage him to explore the humorous side of himself! Maybe you’ll end up with a comedian or a writer or a person who just likes to make people laugh and tell stories!

16:00 my dad has mentioned this so much and I've never once done that stuff in the shower. I just like the hot water and clean thoroughly

You can legally give a baby away as long as if it’s a police station, a fire station , a hospital or a church. Better to give the baby to them than throwing it in a dumpster. You may even get the baby back . Postpartum depression is a real thing

God, I'm 33, with a 16 year old. I've never gone in her room since she became more of a woman than a father would like to admit. And I won't unless she gives me a reason, and even then it'd simply be to verify something I suspect. You can't earn trust without trusting

13:05 i’m sorry but i can’t stop laughing 💀

I hope op with the Aussie son who lives with grandparents, has written "ALWAYS WEAR A JONNY" as the first sentence in the journal and the boy gets it before he has intimate contact with girls!

I would want to know if my mom chose me over fighting her cancer. I was brought into world by two people who didn't want me.

13:10 that poor cat is a victim😭😭

10:20 The spider:Hola The mother:YEET

Sweet Neptune. Clearly all of squidwards musical talent went into boarding

I will never tell my son that I wanted to run away when he was an infant. All he did was cry and I was so tired, and postpartum is no joke. He is 7 years old now and he had a valid reason for crying all the time. We found out when he was 18 months old that he had cerebral palsy and that is likely why all he did was cry. He was hurting. He is doing much better now.

THAT SQUIDWARD DOING TRICKS IN THE START THO NAHH IM CRYIN😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

I once drew some.. **Ahem** _Spicy art_ of a couple of my OCs.. I was a hormonal teen and had never drawn anything like that before, so I liked looking at it a lot, even though I felt really guilty about it. I kept it hidden in a secret spot inside a wooden art supply case my parents had gotten me. I only kept the drawing for about a month or two though before I sneakily got rid of it by stuffing it into a soda can and throwing the can away. I wonder if my mom ever found it.. I _think_ she would've confronted me about it if she had, but I'm not sure. She's super sweet and has always been understanding about my curiosity toward.. spicy things, when I was a teen growing up.. But would've probably wanted to know why I drew it in the first place. Lol.

Oh hey you're still around! Great to hear from ya again

For story 5, I cannot imagine being able to just, talk to my relatives about anything. Especially my parents. Telling them the truth was always, always worse than lying. Inevitably, I would get so good at lying that they'd never know the truth anyway, so I can avoid their aggressive screaming. This is probably the only thing that stopped any physical abuse from happening; my lying gave them time to cool down so they wouldn't just straight up kill me to death 😅

So now I want to know how long it will be before the kids find either that Reddit thread or this video and recognize their parents' story? Oh well.....

Imagine if the kids of those mothers watched this 😂

When I was a kid I kept stuff under my mattress. My dad confronted me about it and threw it away. He wasn't angry. He just knew how hard it was for me to get access to it and knew once he tossed it he was pretty much putting an end to it. And it did. Super frustrating as a kid though.

LOL! trying to milk himself into a bucket!!

Tell the kid what his mom did for him. Even if he didn’t know her, he should know what incredible love his mom had for him. That’s priceless. What if he somehow found out about it before the dad told him? That would put the dad in a bad place, because even though he had good motives, it’s still hiding something back from his kid that the kid has every right to know.

This is hilarious! and I really love your voice☺

Nobody's talking about how squidward be Shmooving in the background

I would have told the story with the insurance.... keeping it secret just makes it look as though the mother never prepared to leave anything for her children

squidward be doing some sick moves

story #26: Why do ppl do this tho? Like: "Hey, I'm really worried that I'm not capable of parental lov-" "I'LL FIND HIM A MOTHER WHO LOVES HIM YOU MONSTER!!!" Like, dude, I can see the horns and fur growing on the husband right before my eyes! This guy is the REAL monster!

*squid ward hits sick flips in the background*

Anyone else just paying more attention to the squidward skateboarding around?

Im soo stupid! English is not my first language and when he read nr. 7, the one with "spankin the monkey" I couldn´t figure out what that meant so I just assumed the kid had spanked a toy monkey or something 🤣. Now I know a little better at least.

That's not what the cat is for, John.

The one that follows the son lol, good mom!

okay but the gameplay in the background is fire

One of my sons went to an under age drinking party in his mid teens. I found out and we went and dragged him out and told the kids there we will be calling police. To this day he has no idea how I found out about this,.... or who let it slip without them even knowing they did.

I love taking long shower too and just getting lost in my thoughts

Squidward got some moves

What will you never tell your kid? Squid ware just doing kick flips in the bg

BRO STORY #11 IS CRAZYYYY

i almost choked on my noodles when u said womp womp

Is nobody going to talk about Squidward absolutely fucking ballin in the background

Good change of color in text for narrator.

“What is something that you’re y will never tell anyone?” *Posts what they will never tell on KZfaq*

18:30 very often in these stories when there is someone with a diagnosed depression everyone around them is expected to act perfectly reasonable and understanding. Dealing with depressed people is difficult and draining and it's easy to get pulled down with them. For him, too, it was a new and probably frightening situation. He didn't act right but not because he is a vile person but because he most likely felt hurt on behalf of his child and just wanted it to be cared of. Life is sometimes hard even if you are not clinically ill.

Bruh the cat one wtf? That's not a "silly child" thing thatis a serious PROBLEM

NGL the last one was pretty funny!

all these secrets while squidward is just nailing those tricks in the bg

See this is why I write and keep it to myself just in case it goes viral. It’s not like my family is looking at that shit but a family friend of theirs might. You just never know.

What I get out of this: 1. Choose less obvious places to hide shmit 2. CLEAR SEARCH HISTORY ON A DAILY BASIS

I'm dying laughing to most of these man

Man I didn’t know squidward had some moves

Oldest of my gen of cousins (big philipino family) so naturally, I have an album of photos that's just them doing stupid shit as toddlers, but they're all preteens and freshmans now so if they saw them they'd be mortified. I'm just waiting for their first gf/bfs/s\o

If I'm not telling them (something that concerns them), I'm certainly not telling reddit and youtube.... What the.....?

Mr crabs’s been real quiet since the background video dropped

Havent watched the video yet, but expecting to see “Santa is Fake”

Story 27 reminds me of a family story where my grandpa didn't want his little sister so he basically took her to the neighbors and switched her for a hen 🤣

Story 19 was kind of wholesome in a way

Can't seem to find this on Spotify.

I don't think the blood clotting disorder one should come to that conclusion. A blow to the head and then a clot a week later? They're not necessarily linked. I'd even go as far to say that it's quite unlikely they're linked.

Squidward grindin 😎

The crieket one perhaps someone let their snake food free

I recognize this game you’re playings level as Australia from tony hawks underground 2 but I feel like I would’ve remembered being able to play as squidward? Where is this version how can I find it??

I remember that too

Squidward us going sicko mode.

Bro the tumblr one LOL. Praying that isn’t my mother

Why is squidward doing skateboard tricks in the bg?

SQUIDWARD IS COOKING 🔥🔥🔥🔥

narrator: talking about addiction, mental illness, and death. squidward skateboarding in the background:

5:40 Wtf? So he's secretly blaming his daughter for his mom dying when he has no idea if his daughter's bonk with the toy caused the blood clot. And he's so worried about her finding out that he posts it on the internet? Either terrible dad or BS story.

10:00 YEET THE BABY

Does anyone know what game is shown on screen?

what is the skateboard game in the back?

7:33 oh, only if he new

The moms: "I wont tell my kids, but Ill tell 10s of thousands of people online!"

What's the tony hawk game at the start

Dang this is going to be hard one

i was chatting with a 12 years old thinking it was a 40 years old man untill he sent me a video than i realized i messed up i really did think he was a 40 or older i was also pretending to be 13 to 14 but it all worked out i lied to him that my account got hacked and i wont be able to talk to him again lol

The cat stories: 😭 😱

i know we're talking about the posts but.. SQUIDWARD SKATER

the beast cancer story is so sad.

2:29 tbh I've been writing them smutty fanfics sense 11 and if my parents knew I'd be desd

is No one gonna talk about squidward skateboarding.

Man I wanna see the kid’s body armor

My parents walked in on me idk how many times since I started-

I found out not long ago that about a year before I was born my mom had a miscarriage so would that technically mean my life is a mistake?

Id tell my child in college

That's not what the cats for LOL traumatized the cat for life will never be the same

Srs post partum depression is not joke and it is way too common for the absolute ignorance it has in our society and in preparation for new mothers and also in the medical profesional community. So much pain and suffering could be avoided if ppl only knew what to look out for.