An introvert's guide to social freedom | Kaspars Breidaks | TEDxRiga

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4 жыл бұрын

Being social for a shy person is difficult already, let alone in a cold, Northern capital city wrought by a past of social mistrust under communist rule. With all the cards stacked against him, Kaspars Breidaks managed to break through the social barriers by following a set of five principles he put together himself. Highly influenced by his experience with improv, following these principles will lead to a kinder environment to live in, and certainly a good laugh every now and then. People who know Kaspars call him half-man, half-amazing. Kaspars seems to be made of pure positivity, charisma, enthusiasm, and humor. Kaspars is all in one: a radio show host, an actor, a co-founder of the Spiediens improvisation theatre, Improv Comedy Riga, and is a proud member of the "Ohana" European improvisation theater project that brings together 50 experienced improvisers from different cultures, countries, and backgrounds.
After performing at Chicago's The Second City Theater, known as the most influential comedy theater in the world, Kaspars returned to Latvia. Kaspars has represented Latvia in various international improvisation shows and at festivals in Portugal, Spain, France, Germany, Denmark, Finland, and Estonia. He is now on a mission to spread the art of improvisation in his own country. For Kaspars, life is theater and he always plays his best. This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at www.ted.com/tedx

Пікірлер: 201
@bwabbel
@bwabbel 2 жыл бұрын
"It's not about you" As an overthinking introvert this is the best but also the hardest advice someone has ever told me
@Poetry4Peace
@Poetry4Peace Жыл бұрын
@tommyflockman7329
@tommyflockman7329 Жыл бұрын
this set me free xo
@nekez2327
@nekez2327 3 жыл бұрын
1. Say yes to what you feel and think 2. Be vulnerable 3. Don’t try to be interesting, be interested/curious 4. If you want to be appreciated, appreciate others (thank others as often as you can) 5. It’s not about you, don’t take it personally.
@user-ug4gm7yx8r
@user-ug4gm7yx8r 2 жыл бұрын
Thanks for the advice buff shrek
@blitheixgaming1289
@blitheixgaming1289 2 жыл бұрын
thx shrek, also nice pectoral muscles
@tacticalcloud642
@tacticalcloud642 2 жыл бұрын
Thanks for the spark notes, hakuna matata
@silvy925
@silvy925 2 жыл бұрын
Thanks shreky
@bbuser
@bbuser Жыл бұрын
thanks for posting
@Jo_Bond
@Jo_Bond 4 жыл бұрын
Shyness and introversion are two different things. You can be an introvert and not be shy.
@joshuah1221
@joshuah1221 4 жыл бұрын
FACTS!!
@Mark-xw5yt
@Mark-xw5yt 4 жыл бұрын
And you can be a shy extrovert.
@dielicagold
@dielicagold 4 жыл бұрын
But they often go together.
@Jo_Bond
@Jo_Bond 4 жыл бұрын
@@dielicagold Not always and maybe it's less obvious if the introvert is outgoing.
@tsnstonepilot5375
@tsnstonepilot5375 4 жыл бұрын
@@Jo_Bond Doesn't 'often go together' imply not always? You're right, of course
@HaloHighlightz
@HaloHighlightz Жыл бұрын
Tips to train your small talk muscle - without small talk, there is not big talk 9:01 1. Say yes to what you feel or think (9:07) - for anything to happen, we must accept each other’s ideas 2. We are not machines; it’s okay to be vulnerable (11:17) - in trying to protect from the bad, walls also keep out the good 3. Stop trying to be interesting and be interesting (12:00) - make whatever you say worth it by being genuine 4. If you want to be appreciated, appreciate others (12:56) - cherish time and what you create; don’t go an hour without thanking someone 5. It’s not about you (15:34) - if it doesn’t go how you planned, it more than likely has nothing to do with you; they may have something going on
@artdzot
@artdzot 11 ай бұрын
👍🤩🎉 thank you
@manishsuneliya463
@manishsuneliya463 3 ай бұрын
Thanks
@ThandekaMalinga
@ThandekaMalinga 3 жыл бұрын
I started my KZfaq Channel for Introverts and those dealing with Anxiety because as an introvert I believe we need more people talking about introversion and anxiety in order to bring awareness and a sense of normalcy.
@-kilian-6217
@-kilian-6217 3 жыл бұрын
Well, I'm on the way to your channel !
@laughwithme3174
@laughwithme3174 2 жыл бұрын
amazing good for you thandeka
@jasmin27798
@jasmin27798 2 жыл бұрын
So true, Awesome! Ill be checking your channel out sis :)
@spiralmewtrix
@spiralmewtrix 4 жыл бұрын
The things he talked about have helped me immensely with my shyness as well. I especially try to remember that "it isn't about me" and to not dwell too much on when things don't work out.
@lavenderandgold8588
@lavenderandgold8588 10 ай бұрын
"we protect ourselves from the good" that one hit me. all the missed opportunities and relationships i bypassed makes me sad.
@yeshua963
@yeshua963 Жыл бұрын
I've made the experience that the most people can't be too long with us introverts because they can't handle the silence and get nervous very quickly. Everytime when I've sat in the coffee shop and people came to my desk they got nervous and left.
@richasaxena6636
@richasaxena6636 4 жыл бұрын
It is such a pain to be an introvert and an HSP to interact with people who do not understand you. Worst is when people ask you personal questions and force you to socialize.
@Trade1001
@Trade1001 3 жыл бұрын
And the constant nagging in your brain about what people are thinking.
@David98004
@David98004 2 жыл бұрын
You should check the Myers Briggs personality test to see if you are indeed an INFJ the rarest personality in the world. Usually INFJ' are highly sensitive and introverted.
@alwinw64
@alwinw64 2 жыл бұрын
No you see, the worst is when you want them to ask personal questions but they don't care and you're too polite to blurt it out 😭
@mary-du7sv
@mary-du7sv 2 жыл бұрын
What is HSP? ( Hello from 2022) : )
@xiongly435
@xiongly435 2 жыл бұрын
@@David98004 that isn't an accurate test :o..O
@OmegaSwitch
@OmegaSwitch 4 жыл бұрын
I recently signed up for my first improv class after going to my first show and hanging out with the improv crew. As a heavily introverted person, I imagine this will be transformative... o_o
@ariettej4271
@ariettej4271 4 жыл бұрын
Congrats, have fun, and don't be too hard on yourself!
@tropicaleugene3029
@tropicaleugene3029 4 жыл бұрын
Good luck 🤗
@urldog8876
@urldog8876 4 жыл бұрын
Hey, how it's going?
@robbenuyttens4977
@robbenuyttens4977 4 жыл бұрын
Any goods result yet?
@izzie2070
@izzie2070 2 жыл бұрын
Update?
@temma4173
@temma4173 4 жыл бұрын
Thanks Kaspars, let's keep shining instead of living in shyness ☀️
@sillygoober698
@sillygoober698 4 жыл бұрын
I love how this is getting recommended to us all during quarantine lmao
@Silentpartner2176
@Silentpartner2176 4 жыл бұрын
I congratulate you on facing your shyness. I'm glad you said what you did. I still have a ways to go to face mine. I like that you said, I don't do it to change the world, but I do it for me. I needed to hear that.
@falandocomluciapsicologa
@falandocomluciapsicologa Жыл бұрын
Verdade precisamos fazer por nos mesmos ... Eu tambem ja fui muito , ai resolvi gradativamente mudar isso. Não sou uma pessoa que virou a ser uma contadora de piada mais me transformei numa pessoa que não se preocupa tanto com o julgamento dos outros...
@denise2169
@denise2169 3 жыл бұрын
Great talk! Lessons in improv helped lift me out of my shyness. It was so much fun that I found myself laughing in ways that gave me confidence to let go, take chances and ty new things. Since. Since then, I no longer fear talking to strangers, and the lessons I learned about having fun have changed my life.
@gaby5546
@gaby5546 2 жыл бұрын
*Anybody else think he looks like Chris Pratt if you squished his head down a little???* Great talk though! As an introvert and also sometimes a shy one, when I'm alone I'm the most outgoing, friendly and charming person in my head, but then in real social situations all my eagerness goes out the window.
@wesleypavon1287
@wesleypavon1287 Жыл бұрын
I really loved this!! You don't have an idea about how much I've been struggling with shyness, this was actully life-changing, this a new beginning in my life and thanks for this video!
@galeno-healthsciencepreven5075
@galeno-healthsciencepreven5075 4 жыл бұрын
Great talk. Living alone is very difficult sometimes. Connection may help create meaning in life.
@Poetry4Peace
@Poetry4Peace Жыл бұрын
exacluy!
@ariettej4271
@ariettej4271 4 жыл бұрын
I really enjoyed this. Quite funny! And great message that I'm sure a lot of us relate to. Pulls me out of my head a little bit and puts things into perspective.
@deepgandhi9753
@deepgandhi9753 3 жыл бұрын
Quite a storyteller he is!
@Paul-ds6mp
@Paul-ds6mp 2 жыл бұрын
this was very helpful thank so much. I'm an extreme introvert and this vidéo motivated me to write this
@daniel51020
@daniel51020 4 жыл бұрын
Brilliant, thank you.
@harshwithtruth
@harshwithtruth 2 жыл бұрын
This line to be grateful for the time and space we have.
@properpsychology1276
@properpsychology1276 2 жыл бұрын
"Each person is an island unto himself, in a very real sense; and he can only build bridges to other islands if he is first of all willing to be himself and permitted to be himself" - Carl Rogers
@yuuri9064
@yuuri9064 2 жыл бұрын
Thank you for this speech.
@blackpantsog
@blackpantsog 3 жыл бұрын
Thank you!
@nabilapinontoan7763
@nabilapinontoan7763 2 жыл бұрын
i was a shy introvert. but i have improved a lot by the time i got in high school, and rn im already in the uni. And we re always told to create wider relations, so bcs the uni it's like a new start for me, i feel like i have to really step out and brace my self up. I always talk to ppl first, i want to make a good impression with new friends i meet in the uni. but im still me, even though i dont have any problem with startin the conversation, or meeting strangers, at some time i will be quiet so much and then my friends would ask me if im being okay. In fact, i dont really have a problem with performing my self in fron tof the ppl too (although sometimes the shyness feeling and anxious are still there, but i can manage it way better). The problem is that i feel so lazy now. i don tknow why, but everytime i'm going to talk to the ppl or performing my self there, i feel so sleepy and lazy in all of a sudden. anyone experiences the sam ething like this?
@GAMESHOW964
@GAMESHOW964 Ай бұрын
Me😂
@miriami7
@miriami7 4 жыл бұрын
Great talk. Thank you very much Kaspars.
@olgagrinko4511
@olgagrinko4511 3 жыл бұрын
As an introvert from Lithuania I strongly relate to this talk lol I enjoyed it a lot!
@dzikrakamila4431
@dzikrakamila4431 3 жыл бұрын
This is wholesome! Thanks for sharing thiss!!
@nicholasv7
@nicholasv7 4 жыл бұрын
Great talk!
@mounirhamzi8893
@mounirhamzi8893 2 жыл бұрын
This is the best Ted talk ever...and i love this guy
@pyang264
@pyang264 4 жыл бұрын
I love this!! Brings so much clarity to my introverted shy quiet personality.
@mallinen0777
@mallinen0777 Жыл бұрын
Great insights here, Kaspars. Thank You.
@veronikavebere2522
@veronikavebere2522 4 жыл бұрын
Fantastic!
@edwardsbarbara25
@edwardsbarbara25 4 жыл бұрын
Excellent!!
@ihsanislam651
@ihsanislam651 3 жыл бұрын
Shyness and introvert goes hand in hand. Not sure why people making such a distinction between two
@superswag3252
@superswag3252 3 жыл бұрын
Actually yes, shyness makes you an introvert "de facto" because you're more confortable being alone when you're shy
@GeIrb1
@GeIrb1 3 жыл бұрын
Not really. Introversion is just the way you get your energy. Introverts get drained from being around people. Shyness is about not being confident in yourself or to overly concerned with how other people will react.
@Noah-zr7zd
@Noah-zr7zd 2 жыл бұрын
No. Introversion describes how you react to stimuli, like meeting new people, talking in front of an audience etc. It is also closely linked to reactiveness and risk aversion. Depending on your response to certain neurotransmitters, you are introverted or extraverted (or a mixture). Shyness is more closely linked to fears, like being rejected or embarrassing yourself.
@ihsanislam651
@ihsanislam651 2 жыл бұрын
@@Noah-zr7zd hmm interesting take on that, make sense
@cevcena6692
@cevcena6692 2 жыл бұрын
@@superswag3252 find that most shy people are extraverted because they have the desire to talk to people but just can't
@yashwanthy9887
@yashwanthy9887 Жыл бұрын
"Give your best and dont expect the same". I really loved your talk thank you very much
@MoneyManny103
@MoneyManny103 3 жыл бұрын
Amazing, thank you...... from today i promise myself to share my powerful positive energy with the rest of the world
@rayjamesv5641
@rayjamesv5641 3 жыл бұрын
Wow! Such a wholesome talk.I'm blessed 😍🤩😇😇
@dimitridehouck9506
@dimitridehouck9506 3 жыл бұрын
That elevator part gave me 2020 anxiety.
@browsepulver
@browsepulver Жыл бұрын
Im doing Improv too, its great to improve social skills. I loved this talk, thank you Kaspar!
@sourov7704
@sourov7704 Жыл бұрын
Thank you.... Man❤️❤️
@stevenbrown7852
@stevenbrown7852 4 жыл бұрын
Most excellent thank you I needed this video very much.Introverts indeed suffer and it is a problem.Not YET so much better than NO not at all.Genius video man incredible.
@Martina8ify
@Martina8ify Жыл бұрын
Thank you so much for sharing your experiences and all those valuable tips. The way you presented them was funny and charming, which helps when dealing with such a challenging topic.
@Reverend1138
@Reverend1138 4 жыл бұрын
That really made me think about my perspective when it comes to interacting with folk I don't know. I'd prefer not to but he makes it sound like it just might be ok.
@ajay7665
@ajay7665 7 ай бұрын
9:38 10:04 11:14 11:59 12:57 15:30
@ilhammahmoud9453
@ilhammahmoud9453 3 жыл бұрын
great talk men it was so useful thank you and to ted that bring people like you. ♥️
@ladygagagh7701
@ladygagagh7701 3 жыл бұрын
Muchas gracias pa estas informaciones
@MuhammadAsim-ee8gk
@MuhammadAsim-ee8gk 4 жыл бұрын
This is really Excellent speech i,v ever heard i can relate in every experience he share.Peoples who are suffering with Avoident personality disorder and social anxiety can use these tips to come out of their comfort zone and enjoy their lives with meeting new peoples.
@anthonyr.1568
@anthonyr.1568 2 жыл бұрын
Paldies for the great tips, Kaspars! I just came back from a trip in your beautiful country and I must say that Latvians are among the unfriendliest nations I've met. Must be hard to grow up as a shy person/introvert in a country where people don't even say hi to a shop clerk and where the smiling rate approximates 0.5%.
@silvy925
@silvy925 2 жыл бұрын
Thank u so much for this video. Really was interesting and helped me
@nouhailaarrachi1949
@nouhailaarrachi1949 Жыл бұрын
Great thalks ❤ I will start to day doing theart to fighting my shyness . I Will go to talke with each person without thinking so match because we can learn from everyone.
@luciaengel3
@luciaengel3 4 жыл бұрын
Thánk you!!!!
@stormycat5514
@stormycat5514 4 жыл бұрын
I can relate to a lot of the experiences. This is really great!
@sharonlee4495
@sharonlee4495 2 жыл бұрын
Mmm
@achintyabhat9394
@achintyabhat9394 3 жыл бұрын
I watched it at 1.5x and didn't realize till half of the video was over.
@San_akeh
@San_akeh Жыл бұрын
This was such a good speech❤️🥰
@amo5143
@amo5143 2 жыл бұрын
It's possible to get rid of Shyness. Just need to put some extra efforts. Thanks for this amazing talk!
@Mr_someone
@Mr_someone Жыл бұрын
Thankyou
@danielChibuogwu
@danielChibuogwu 7 ай бұрын
It's not about you 💯💯💯 Love it
@Poetry4Peace
@Poetry4Peace Жыл бұрын
this was very wise and the tips like how to not take it persoanly as its NOT ABOUT US is something i need to improv and download to ma brainn!
@candykandy
@candykandy 3 жыл бұрын
He’s hilarious. I mean, this is informative too but I love the comedy lol
@Poetry4Peace
@Poetry4Peace Жыл бұрын
nice dp lol
@bartcolen
@bartcolen 2 жыл бұрын
I love the fact that the video guide for introverts begins with an explosion of loud, jarring music and bright, flashing lights. The speaker may well understand us, but the video editor perhaps somewhat less so.
@prasannab2097
@prasannab2097 4 жыл бұрын
Nice
@clara9873
@clara9873 Жыл бұрын
omaga LOOOOOOOVE DIS
@Builtlikeagun
@Builtlikeagun 4 жыл бұрын
Title is misleading. This is about shyness, not introversion.
@danylooo
@danylooo 4 жыл бұрын
ehh, introversion is a misleading label. Having your energy drained by social interaction is probably caused by fear. Shyness, fear, introversion, social anxiety are all interconnected. Our "over-civilized" mind just slaps a label on the problem and assumes that's just the way things are.
@marcnietocachinero
@marcnietocachinero 4 жыл бұрын
@@danylooo You can be an introvert and talk like that man there with all the confidence and you would say it's not a shy person but an introvert one it could be, then what? It just happens introvert people often are also shy because of low social skills. But you can be very confident in social-interactions and be introverted at the same time. Don't talk about something you probably haven't experienced.
@danylooo
@danylooo 4 жыл бұрын
@@marcnietocachinero if youre confident/comfortable in social interactions, why would you still feel drained by conversation (ain't this the hallmark of being introverted?) Of course there are those heavy conversations that will drain anybody but introverts are supposed to be have their energy drained by all interactions?
@Caanze
@Caanze 4 жыл бұрын
@@danylooo I am super confident and comfortable in conversation with friends and even interesting strangers. I got labled an extrovert recently by a shy person. I was surprised, I came across as extroverted because I really really am extremely introverted. I am exhausted and tired after a few hours of great interaction with friends. Give me an hour alone in the woods or at home to recharge and I can keep going a bit longer that day, but the actual interaction times between needs for alone-time get shorter and shorter until I've had some more time to be on my own again.
@snoozyq9576
@snoozyq9576 Жыл бұрын
​@@danylooo fear isn't the only draining thing in the world
@anon6056
@anon6056 Жыл бұрын
You're a really beautiful person
@Kukezh
@Kukezh 4 жыл бұрын
Labs! :)
@bklynsteph66
@bklynsteph66 Жыл бұрын
❤️
@kittens3029
@kittens3029 2 жыл бұрын
Nice intro
@Stegar
@Stegar 3 жыл бұрын
"Imagine you're at a party..." why? I never go to parties
@___MJ____
@___MJ____ 3 жыл бұрын
Ikr people always want to imagine a party situation, like man I got other things to do.
@adios-bitchachos
@adios-bitchachos 2 жыл бұрын
I hate the title of this video. Introversion does not always equal shyness. I'm an introvert - I am NOT shy and am often one of the first to speak up in various situations. I thought this video was going to be about how to navigate a world that expects you to be sociable when you don't WANT to be, not when you want to be but are afraid
@2bagemini
@2bagemini 2 жыл бұрын
tooth and back pain combined with a bullet in the shoulder… sounds like a scandinavian noir… from one shy monkey to another… kudos
@valdie91285
@valdie91285 4 жыл бұрын
This is about shyness, not introversion.
@Trade1001
@Trade1001 3 жыл бұрын
In most cases, it occurs together. The biggest problem an introvert has is lack of social skills. I am an introvert and shy person.
@snoozyq9576
@snoozyq9576 Жыл бұрын
​@@Trade1001 they're two different things. whether they can go together isn't the basis for whether they are different or not
@jason3775
@jason3775 4 жыл бұрын
Hit home.
@NeelamSingh-mk3lv
@NeelamSingh-mk3lv 2 жыл бұрын
Vdo starts at 8:45
@Dachusttin
@Dachusttin Жыл бұрын
Phitography good idea,invisible en paeties unico, habla buena idea -teatro improv - "no se trata de vos" - shy != int - 1. Say yes to what you say and feel, pruoritize yourself 2. Ok vulnerable [actual insecurity tho] 3. Interested > interesting 4.appreciate to be appreciated 5. Its not about you Eventually yes stranger
@saraodoherty6787
@saraodoherty6787 2 жыл бұрын
My grandma still advises me not to talk to strangers…perhaps this is why, at 26 I’m still afraid to talk to people I don’t know.
@Uvvibes
@Uvvibes 2 жыл бұрын
People are strange when your a stranger
@millerfour2071
@millerfour2071 2 жыл бұрын
9:44, 20:50
@shanemiller7543
@shanemiller7543 3 жыл бұрын
Thought thumb nail was Chris Pratt
@estherloidanc
@estherloidanc 2 жыл бұрын
Introvert can instruct be creative mindful but when teaching engaging that is a different ball game. So standing there speaking is really not tooth ache
@purplememe
@purplememe 2 жыл бұрын
17:46 🌈
@haksseupjjanehal1186
@haksseupjjanehal1186 2 жыл бұрын
Introvert ✋✋
@iqrakhano7618
@iqrakhano7618 2 жыл бұрын
Me too with high level of shyness
@SauceyNoodle
@SauceyNoodle 4 жыл бұрын
0:34 uh oh stinky
@alix6553
@alix6553 4 жыл бұрын
Here too early
@blaydes4612
@blaydes4612 Жыл бұрын
This confuses introversion with social anxiety
@ganeshsonawanemail
@ganeshsonawanemail Жыл бұрын
Is Chris Pratt a shy guy? I didn't know.
@-trolling-6680
@-trolling-6680 4 жыл бұрын
This speach is taken from "How to win friends and influence people"😘
@134subscribers3
@134subscribers3 3 жыл бұрын
I needed a camera
@zodammit
@zodammit 4 жыл бұрын
You mean you talk to people in person using mouth-words??? How quaint.
@Mooscota
@Mooscota Жыл бұрын
I’m so unlucky I’m a introvert and 6’3 I grew my dreads to get the attention off me
@pawansharma27
@pawansharma27 3 жыл бұрын
He looks like rahul Gandhi 😂😂🇮🇳🇮🇳
@CRYPTONIC47
@CRYPTONIC47 3 жыл бұрын
U r shy not introvert 🙁🙁🙁
@visisuni11
@visisuni11 4 жыл бұрын
Ir par ko padomát
@user-li1jc3le3i
@user-li1jc3le3i 4 жыл бұрын
..
@doramaciel9125
@doramaciel9125 4 жыл бұрын
Brazil!
@beomtori420
@beomtori420 4 жыл бұрын
hello
@siksparnis3434
@siksparnis3434 4 жыл бұрын
.?
@wiadodo605
@wiadodo605 4 жыл бұрын
??
@manishkushwaha7060
@manishkushwaha7060 Жыл бұрын
He is certainly not an introvert now 😅
@villainarcttv8758
@villainarcttv8758 2 жыл бұрын
BORING
@fisheromen18
@fisheromen18 4 жыл бұрын
TED talks have really gone down hill. These aren't exactly ideas that are changing the world.
@nazria4375
@nazria4375 2 жыл бұрын
❤️
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