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As a person who is on the spectrum and transgender, this is what I think about why they’re linked. Gender is very social, and if you struggle socially you can struggle with the social aspects of gender. If I never had to socialize with others, my gender would be irrelevant. In many ways my gender identity feels more like an inconvenience, at least to me. Why does my gender have to determine favorite colors, job preferences, and hobbies? For me this is how I feel.

When he said, "Autistic people think of social interactions as a mathematical problem instead of understanding it intrinsically," I felt that. As much as I feel that I can empathize with people, it's only from years of watching interactions and watching therapists do skits and doing my own research on behavior and where it comes from. Each person is like a new mathematical problem that I have to find the formula for, and I feel more comfortable when I tell people my formula(s) on how to help or comfort me.

Does anyone else just forget their gender. Like you have no problem with your birth assigned gender but you just forget it exists. You don't think about it. You're just... You. And you do things that make you happy, you rarely think about the gender stereotypes as they hold no importance to you.

I'm a straight cis male, and I've recently found out I'm autistic. What's super interesting to me about this video is that I definitely had a "crisis of masculinity" when I was younger (17, 18, 19), in part because it felt like a lot of other neurotypical men heavily rejected parts of my personality that were considered "not masculine." To this day, I often get people ask me if I'm gay, because it simply doesn't make sense to me to "perform" certain aspects of masculinity (especially those that seem entirely for the benefit of other men, rather than women). It was actually quite a frustrating experience before I understood I was autistic. I would not at all be surprised if other autistic people also feel like they don't belong in their "assigned" gender because of similar feelings of being completely unable to relate to the socially constructed facets of gender and sexuality.

The thing you said there at the end about "how to tell if a teenager is faking it" is something I wish I could tell everyone, I've been trying to explain this for years, calling kids out for "faking it", even if they are, doesn't do shit, and if they're not faking it, makes everything worse.

As a transgender person, the last question about "faking it" triggered a bad train of thought. It is so nice for a psychiatrist to finally say straight, that even if someone is indeed faking it, there still is an underlying problem there that shouldn't be omitted. Thank you.

as someone who was diagnosed with autism from a very young age (now 19) with massive issues of being able to understand my own emotions, processing, and picking up social cues etc., ive come to realise that gender doesn’t really exist in my mind. I’m physically a male, but i like to appear as more feminine and such, but also proud of my masculine parts as well as being bisexual. being honest i would call myself non-binary, but the social difficulty that comes with trying to convey that to others outweighs any actual benefits for me. i found this video so interesting and enlightening

Low functioning/severe autism is used to deny agency. High functioning is used to deny needs. Non-verbal does not mean non-thinking, non-feeling and non-understanding.

I'm transgender and diagnosed with asd. Something that's happened to me with a past therapist and that many autistic ppl have experienced with medical professionals, is that whenever we come at them with a concern they just brush it off and say "oh it's just your autism" or they straight up treat us like children that can't think for ourselves. Something that I'm kinda afraid might happen if this information becomes widespread with doctors/therapists, is that transphobes will use it as an excuse to deny people treatment because "oh are you really trangender or are you just autistic?" and "you just think you're nonbinary because of your autism". Because trust me, transphobes will death grip any excuse they can find to deny treatment. Don't get me wrong, obviously some ppl are rlly just confused and it's important to experiment with gender identity and not immediately jump to hrt without waiting to know for certain that's what you want. What I'm talking about is ppl who are 100% certain that they're trans/nonbinary. And most autistic ppl have at least 1 bad experience with a medical professional not taking them seriously because they can't grasp the idea that we can think independently

What a time we live in where a DOCTOR can disseminate new information to EVERYONE who has an internet connection for FREE. truly gg from healthy gamer

As an autistic adult I have a hard enough job trying to identify as human. Specifics beyond 'I AM' just seen to be pigeon-holing society into smaller and smaller boxes increasing diversity but reducing inclusion. People are just people and should be embraced for being an individual. I don't like the terms disorder and issues and I loved your statement that it is a disorder or issue if it has a debilitating effect on one's life. We don't call people who wear glasses disabled despite the fact they would be need a lot of external support without them.

The difficulties forming romantic relationships isn’t necessarily only because autism but there are many posible variables. Many autistic individuals also have trauma due to lived experiences and sensory related.

15:15 "In the medical field, and in society, we are grappling with what constitutes a disorder vs is an acceptable, normal variant of human beings." I've been thinking about that a lot, and I love how Dr. K described it.

as an autistic nonbinary person THANK YOU. im so tired of people telling me im faking my gender or my autism because "oh you have too many things." without understanding like 90% of my things are comorbid. my special interest is psychology so i read a lot of studies and no matter how many studies on gender and autism i show people they never believe me. thank you for spreading the word !! this was such a validating video to watch

I’m a trans man, not diagnosed with autism. I’ve believed for a while now that it’s a possibility there’s a connection between the two and that a lot of trans people are underdiagnosed. I’m now 23 and slowly realizing I may be on the spectrum. It presents in so many different ways, and I think a lot of psychologists just look for the most obvious things. For example, many autistic people have difficulties empathizing, however some are the opposite and are highly aware of others’ emotions to the point of being overwhelmed. Very interesting video, thanks for helping break down the study

As a trans person who tests high for autistic traits, it’s truly wild to like *know* this correlation but having nothing but “trust me” as my source. This is cool!

I was super hesitant coming into this video, since topics like this can very easily become dismissive and toxic, but you approached it from such an open-minded perspective and one of trying to use the information to help people. As an autistic nonbinary person, thank you for this incredibly interesting video!

I’d be curious to know how much these experiences get exacerbated during and after puberty. It seems to me that during puberty is especially when those gender norms get prescribed in full force. I remember feeling quite fond of my childhood, it was during puberty when the norms between boys and girls started getting really weird and hard to navigate. Me being nice to a girl suddenly became associated with me flirting with her, and that made me feel very weird, as an example.

This may help me a lot. I have Autism and for the past year I have been identifying as Gender-fluid. I have came out to my parents of late and it hasn't been going well. They say they didn't see signs and it's hard to believe and they are trying to tie it with my ex that they hate. It has been really hard because I have to be in the house hold, can't express myself in any nb/fem way and it's been really hard. I have family therapy with them and it hasn't progressed but I think this study might show why I didn't show a lot of signs to them because it has been really hard for me to explain to them why I am and when I am and it's just been really hard.

To me, on a surface level at least, the link between ASD and Gender non-conformity screams that our concepts of gender are purely social constructions. Someone who is already struggling with abiding by all forms of social norms would of course feel alienated by the social imposition of gender norms as well. I think we have a lot to learn from folks with ASD about what elements of humanity are 'natural,' and which elements are a result of the legacy of dominant cultures. It's worth noting that there have always been societies where gender norms were more flexible and allowed for more diverse gender roles (such as the pan-indigenous 'Two-Spirit') than the rigid gender binary most of us are more familiar with in western society.

I really appreciate your answer to the last question about "faking gender issues" because nobody but the person knows whether or not gender is the root cause of their distress. Address it as if it is genuine, and you will either help them figure out their gender or identify the root cause and work on that. Great video!

i just found out i am autistic recently, and i have always hated being told that certain behaviors, stlyes, or friendships, were off limits because of gender, it felt very authoritarian and arbirtary. i want to have long hair and befriend people of all genders and dress like a stand user! and ive yet to hear a compelling argument as to why i shouldnt.

As an autistic who is agender/nonbinary, I think there are two very clear reasons (mind you I'm not discarding something genetic): 1. Gender is a social construct, we don't normally understand those, so we are more likely to break them 2. We are already marginalized, that makes it easier to identify with other marginalized identities because we are already outsiders, who cares if it's for one or multiple reasons?

I'm autistic and cisgender, but when I experimented a bit with other genders I found a big struggle was the literal thinking aspect of my mentality. I had to quantify what I consider to be "womanhood" and "manhood" and "neither" in relatively concrete terms. I would love to be able to hear from non-cis autistic people about if that was a hurdle for them as well.

Came to the comments first to see the type of audience the creator has and holy crap, it’s nothing but genuine ppl sharing experiences and being supportive of each other and I’m so happy to have come across this channel 😭💕

I'm a clinician who specializes in autism, and I just want to say thank you so much for developing your platform and putting this out there. Unfortunately, I think many clinicians don't understand autism enough, and they don't consider it when they're working with individuals with gender dysphoria. And, of course, the average person doesn't have this information to help them navigate it either. Also, you did a fantastic job scratching the surface of this topic without leaving people with just enough information to be dangerous or misunderstand - although, I'm sure that will still happen. Awesome video that I'll definitely be sharing.

As someone with ASD, (probably, it hasn't been officially diagnosed, but I have my reasons), I might be able to provide a bit of insight here (although potentially severely limited in this case by being cisgendered and heterosexual). One of the main ASD traits that I have is that I don't particularly care for social conventions - everything has to have a reason for me to care, and "that's just how it is" doesn't do it for me. That leaves people like me more free to explore gender identity, as I suspect we have less stigmas regarding gender identity than the average person. My hypothesis would predict that a similar link exists between ASD and homosexuality, bisexuality, and generally being some kind of LGBTQ+, so that might be a good way to see if I'm right (which I may well not be).

The concept of mentalisation development is really helpful, tfs. I have been in recovery from borderline PD and realised a lot of the stuff I had laying around in my psychological attic was not some mystery PD but ASD. The BPD explains all of my relationships, the ASD describes all of my academic and career struggles and triumphs. I got really burnt out and triggered by notions of pursuing a just world. Now that I know what I'm working with inside, it's been so simple to resolve inner conflict and turmoil. I know how to pack my BPD and ASD away so harmoniously they are not only not a burden, but an asset.

Love the way you answered that question about "faking" gender identity disorder. It's obvious that you were uncomfortable with the question but you stayed on task. I wrote a piece not long ago about the brutality behind that accusation of being "fake", while ignoring what might be a symptom or a cry for help. Accusing someone of being "fake" or "faking" is a dismissal, but moreover, the intent behind it can be a bit of a beat down. I can dismiss you. I can ignore you. You are not worth my attention. You are faking. This says so much more about the accuser than it does about the alleged "faker." Also, interesting observation of mine is that "faking" is approved in some circumstances, such as bravery or confidence, but derided in others such as illness or emotional states. What's up with that?

i really appreciate your answer to the question about teenagers "making up" their gender identity issues. i feel like there is this overwhelmingly prevalent assumption that many, many people willl just "make up" their issues for whatever reason. attention, usually. while this may sound like a deceptively harmless thing to be worried about, it kind of feeds into the horrible narrative of marginalized people not knowing what they actually are, what they need and whats best for them. that they are delusional in some way or even malicious maybe for trying to "get" something by "lying". but lets be honest; what totally healthy, happy, cisgender person would make up that theyre trans?? for what??? even if they DID make it up, that would be worthy of examination as well, since thats not really the norm either. this mentality is what made me question myself for so many years, not wanting to get checked for adhd bc for some reason, i convinced myself that actually, i was just making it all up without meaning to, and that the doctors would be like "you are making this up to get special treatment, get out". they didnt say that, obviously, and i do have inattentive adhd, turns out. so im very glad hat you kind of rejected the premise in the first place. this was such an interesting video, as i have also been questioning my gender identity as a woman for quite a few years now as well. as adhd and autism are also brought up in the same conversations a lot of the time, i wonder if there is some kind of like there as well? well, i dont know, but it sure is interesting to think about all of this!

I've been diagnosed with ASD recently, and it explains a lot of my life. A variety of my skills and traits allowed me to adjust and manage to live with it quite well. I have struggled with mental disorders, but I do not consider my autism in itself to be an "illness". It is, in some way, a part of me and who I am, and I like who I am! To me, a disorder starts at the point where it seriously affects one's day-to-day life in a negative way, and I know that lots of folks with ASD do struggle on a daily basis. It's hard to put it into words, but it feels like it's in some ways a disorder and in some ways it's not, and it varies person-to-person. That's why it's so hard to define. Still, no matter what the definition and wording is, neurodivergent folks should be provided with the needed help, as well as respect. We're all valid! That comes down to gender identity as well. I have actually no idea what gender is supposed to feel like to me, and I feel just a general lack of connection to describing things as feminine or masculine, and to be honest, I don't really care. What I do care about is that everyone feels comfy in their bodies, and I see no issue in adjusting them to feel more like yourself. I myself usually like to use they/them pronouns, and I believe I am somewhere close to agender. However, I am fine with how my body looks, I like its shape and form. The only thing I'm against is what people associate with my body, so I would prefer to look more neutral to avoid that.

In graduate school we spent a full year critiquing research studies. We used studies from very prestigious journals, like JAMA, Lancet and others. In that year we found only ONE study that had no significant flaws. Some things like the correlation between autism and gender issues are very hard to study by their nature. The first thing that jumped out at me was whether the studies corrected for confounding variables. In other words were there other factors that were not controlled for. Also, although he said there were more than one age group, change over time was not described. It seems to me that the correlation is strong enough that even flaws in the studies might not overcome the validity. But I think much more rigorous studies need to be done.

As an autistic transfemme, i think socialization was a big part of it for me. I remember pretty distinctly feeling alienated by "boys groups" and struggling to understand behaviors that were expected of me as a result of my gender and often got bullied because of that. Around middleschool I stopped bothering trying to meet them but still hadn't really figured out specifics but probably would have if the concept of transness had been something I knew about, but I got there eventually lmao

I saw recently an article about autistic identity that described allistic identified as being defined primarily from one's social interactions, while an autistic person's identity was defined more through values and passions. I feel that this explains the connection between autism and gender identity rather well since we're less likely to identify based on the social groups we're matched with. Instead we either spend a long time considering gender turning the concept as a while into a passion, it it never gets to that state and thereby simply didn't register as a part of one's identity. Something interesting that I'd noticed is that not only are autistic people more likely to be LGBT+ than allistic people, being nonbinary, asexual, or bisexual are all even more likely compared to their usual proportions in the allistic LGBT+ community. What these have in common is that they specifically put less focus on gender. Not only are we more likely to have a gender that doesn't align with the traditional binary, but we also seen to be less likely to take that binary into account when looking for relationships in others.

Doing such a large-scale analysis takes so much time and effort. I'm glad they were able to publish their findings.

I knew I was transgender when I was 4, I told my older sister "I'm a boy trapped in a girl's body" and she never forgot it. I said it again at 7, same exact line, and at 12 I finally started going by my real name and living as a boy. I was diagnosed with autism when I was 6. Knew I was trans at 4, diagnosed with autism at 6... If that's interesting to ponder... Also never told my abusive parents because they had already become way more hateful and abusive when my teachers told them I had autism they didn't want a " useless r****d kid" and thei threw my sister out at age 15 when she told them she was a lesbian so if a teacher told them I was trans like these new laws being proposed, they probably would have literally killed me as they were so violent with me already or they'd abandon me on the street and who knows what would happen to a 6 or 7 year old "girl" left on the street alone probably r*** and murder if not child trafficking. So... Don't pass those literally deadly bills and realize your votes are actually going to kill real children all over the country.

I'm autistic, it took me a very long time to be able to tell when someone was "into" me or just staring or being nice haha I have always been very gentle hearted and introverted and have a lot of feminine traits and long hair. what feels masculine to me is different from how I see a lot of males act, a combination of intuitive and highly sensitive, honest and blunt and emotional and also very intellectual and hardworking and devoted to always improving. I let people be how they want and don't try to dominate but gently guide and inspire others and let them find their own voice rather than telling people how to be. I am a natural leader but it just feels different from the way most men do it(not to imply the normal way is bad because it's not) I would see a lot of men taking charge and being dominant and extroverted and thought I must not be very masculine and that's why no women will be with me. But as I got older I realized women were very much interested in me and I could never tell XD now I'm 30 and have a wonderful partner who thinks I'm very masculine in the way she always wished men were and I don't feel conflicted anymore. My masculine energy really shines when doing things that involve deep concentration and skill but really lack when it comes to directing groups of people and social situations though I am great helping people 1 on 1 and express my masculinity by becoming an expert at what I do and helping as many people as possible with my gifts. Think that a lot of gender issues resolve when you find how you want to live your life and find a way to do it. Think a lot of the stereotypes about autism are still wrong. Most of the autistic people I know are more intuitive and feeling based than logical, And only become logical to try to navigate the social situations and language barriers in order to survive and it takes a huge toll on mental resources. I seem completely different based on who I'm talking with. Some people are so difficult for me to read I become very nervous around them and can hardly talk and other people i feel instantly comfortable with and I can talk fluently and am able to settle into myself easier. I think with autism a lot of the gender identity issues could really be more about not understanding why they don't seem like the others of their gender. But if peers didn't make them feel so different maybe they wouldn't have to question their gender. I know I wouldn't have questioned mine if people treated me better or if I knew about autism earlier and could relate the problems I was having with being autistic, I wouldn't have to constantly guess why soany interactions with others went so poorly. Just learning about autism for a few years and my whole life is changing and seeing how misunderstood autism can be it makes me want to try to share my experiences, sorry this post got so long.

It's so common that as a cis guy I sometimes feel like a minority in the autistic community. Before engaging with the wider autistic community I had no idea of the link but it makes sense. Autism heavily influences what clothes feel good or uncomfortable on our skin, what activities we are drawn to or avoid, how we relate to other people and by extension ourselves, what we find pleasurable and what roles we take in life. It really isn't much of a stretch to imagine for a lot of autistic people this would influence or extend to gender identity.

This just makes whats going on in Missouri, and what will likely happen in many other states, even more concerning. The fact that you can't get any form of gender-affirming care if you are autistic, depressed, or have anxiety, is such a blatant attack on the trans community and it's so devastating. I feel so sorry for everyone whos going through that right now, please stay strong and know you're loved. We wont stop fighting

I'm autistic and adhd, and i have always felt pretty sure i was a boy. But that doesn't mean i feel like the other boys, and i think that is still confusing me. Most of my childhood, where i wouldn't follow any norms and just talk to whoever i connected with, i were friends with mostly girls. And i feel like, if i become best friends with a girl once, there isn't nessecarily anything to it, but twice and still to this day connect most often with girls, there might be a course? Since 9 years old i always thought boys were dumb, trying to reign with masculinity over the girls, instead of talking to them (I love girls like any other heterosexual, it's not about that). Maybe the connection, talked about here, is also there for me (i feel like i never really know myself anyway), or maybe autistic people also just in general have another view, without being anything else. Anyone relate? Should probably explore my gender more though.

The REALLY messed up part is there are a ton of doctors and health system that will not allow gender dysohoria to be treated if you have an autism diagnosis because they view it as less “valid” and think it’s a mental health issue related to autism. You are far less likely to be referred to hormone therapy or gender confirmation surgery if you have an autism diagnosis in a lot of places even in the US. They are absolutely related. But it doesn’t make the gender identity and gender confirmation care any less valid.

I don't understand how there's not more studies about autism being genetic. All my father, my brother and I are autistic, and we can trace it back to my great grandfather. In my opinion, the gender identity issues come from not being able to relate to any gender since childhood, due to our different ways to function.

I feel my ex probably should have been checked for these things. He always felt off, didn't want sex and tested dressing in my clothes when I wasn't home. He could almost never make eye contact, rarely could hold a conversation outside of his gaming interest, held no interest in talking about every day life issues or conversations, he found no point in them. I thought possibly he has aspergers. He was usually pretty silent and didn't seem to understand wanting to spend time together as a couple, more of if something is what we are "supposed" to dohe guessed we could do it if it was what he should do with me not to loose me but I felt like a thing, not a person to him. I am a feeling lovey dovey person and I found I could barely feel anything from him. Mostly his frustration of me smothering him. I'm glad we separated that he could be with roommates who also just enjoyed talking about games and things and I found someone who understood and could give back on an emotional level. I believe my ex is happier without me and living a joy filled life without being smothered or tied down by the feeling type relationship I needed but he disliked.

Title: "Psychiatrist Explains Why Autism and Gender Identity Are Connected" Psychiatrist: "We're not really sure why."

I am an autistic cis woman, and I've always thought gender norms were annoying. Its a completely arbitrary thing to stratify society around. I was told I wasn't supposed to like things I liked because of what body type I had, and it didn't make any sense to me so I just ignored what I saw as pointless conformity demands and did what I wanted. I got harassed for that a lot- I support the trans community now because I got bullied for not performing gender the way people wanted, and I empathize with people who don't fit in the stupid boxes.

The thing about mentalising as a mathematical problem is so relatable to me, I always thought I was good at mentalising until i found out how often I am just dead wrong because people (including myself it turns out) don’t function in a perfectly logical way and are therefor not possible to crack using a strictly logical method.

This is really helpful. Thank you for breaking it down with visual highlights. Well done. /Ingrid

Thank you for covering this. I actually wanted to research into this topic for a bit now just did not know if any other case studies existed here. Love you for covering this as a topic for discussion and analysis.

I've never had gender identity issues however I believe I am very high with autistic traits and the journey you have described around mentalising and coming to an understanding of the self resulting in significant reduction in difficulties with romantic relationships was so accurately true for me and for my orientation. Once I realised I was asexual, my life made so much more sense and I was able to interact with members of the opposite sex so much more naturally, and all that anxiety and nerves and uncomfortable simply came from my own lack of understanding of myself and how I do not feel sexual desire for others

my experience post ASD diagnosis was realizing that why I struggled so much with the concept of gender/sex was because of how much it is built upon social constructs and how many definitions and characteristics were plastered on to each word. "Sex = gender, but sex is physical attributes and chromosomes and sex organs, but also appearance and dress, and gender is what I say it is, but also how I perceive you" just made zero sense. My conclusion after setting up flow charts and examining is that there are three definitive categories: sex, gender roles, and gender identity. sex is observable realities of the physical state (sex organs, chromosomes, etc), gender roles is how you are perceived by others and how you're expected to express yourself and behave as a result, and gender identity is the personal attachments and/or detachments to the former two that determine how you choose to label, present and manage yourself

As a nonbinary audhd, with a lot of other issues, i feel like as a whole autism is a lot about the inability to understand social cues and things created in society, like gender. Gender is a societal function rather than a biological one, and with a thing like autism which impacts our ability to interface with that. Autistic people tend to not understand why gender matters. This is why a lot of autistic people tend to be politically leftist, due to a tendency to question why things that are taken at face value are.

I didn’t come of age with transgender tending, but I don’t feel that I presented as feminine till past the age of25. To me it just felt like I was 10 years behind everyone else. So even though I finally got into makeup, hair and being girly late for a 25 year old; it was perfect timing for a 15 year old. This was still a huge struggle for be because I never fit in with my age group or what I look like outwardly . But at the end of the day I do have an androgynous brain. I don’t think that makes me non-binary

I’m redundantly/independently diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder (by at least four Ph.D’s - both as a child [when it was called Asperger’s] and as an adult). I live as a cis male but have probably in many ways always been non-binary. You are quite invested in the “pathology model” of discourse and might consider reading Nick Walker’s “Neuroqueer Heresies.”

This video came at the right time because I am 27F who struggled in socializing, have a completely different interest/hobbies than my friends and loves being in my own world. My friend works as an experienced teacher with special needs kids and said just recently that it's high probability that I have ASD. I will have to find strength and courage to go through assessment and diagnosis. Edit: I don't have gender identity issues and I am straight.

I ain't trans, not even LGBTQ. I am a straight, Autistic male with a dash of ADHD. I have personally always thought about gender as the biological sex. I got a penis, therefore I am male. But I also recognise that gender dysphoria is real, that it causes distress if not adressed. I don't see a issue with people wanting to present themselves differently. I am different from the norm, therefore I accept that others are different too. I also do find that some gender norms are bogus and the idea that certain behaviours should only be attributed to a certain gender to be ridiculous. Why judge people for trying to find themselves? It would be hypocritical of me as I am still trying to find myself. To be comfortable in this alien world.

I liked this video. I've felt I might have a small party of the autism spectrum since way back in the days of Asperger's. I've also experienced many things in my life that lead me to fully believe I am transgender. I'm sure I could have benefited from knowing more about these and possibly had a diagnosis much earlier in life. I was just listening to this in the background and kind of nodding as I checked boxes in my head. Then that last question comes up. For so much of my life I've been told I'm malingering. That word exactly. In school, in the military, at home, in church, my marriage, at work, nobody wants to believe I've ever been honest in my effort or description of my experience. Thanks for the understanding and the answer. I may not have an autism diagnosis, but I do have gender dysphoria, and I have fought so hard against people denying my situation. It helps to know that the clinical path is to resolve rather than solve.

This is really interesting. I'm diagnosed with ADHD and I'm starting to suspect that I also have autism. Right now, I'm happy with my assigned gender, but when I was younger, particularly in middle school, I had some gender dysphoria because I didn't have very many, if any at all, of the stereotypical "girly" traits that the rest of my peers had. I hated pinks and purples, I hated playing with "girl" toys or video games, I preferred playing in the dirt and with bugs and climbing trees, my favorite subjects were the maths and sciences instead of the "girl appropriate" social studies and literatures. I explicitly remember thinking, "I should have been born a boy," and, "I wonder what it would be like to be a boy," on MANY occasions. Turns out, this stuff was just needlessly gendered and I hadn't found the stereotypically "girly" things that I was actually interested in. I still prefer math and science and playing in the dirt and with bugs, but now I'm obsessed with fairies and princesses and knights in shining armor and romance and I'm currently wearing a pink and purple tie dye hoodie. Gender is wibbly wobbly and what you're interested in doesn't determine what your gender actually is. I still explore my identity through D&D and it all just leads me back to, "I am who I am, and that's okay."

I am autistic, was diagnosed at 18 because I kinda went under the radar due to me being a girl, and while I am not trans I have noticed that I think about my gender and my relationship to it way more deeply than my non autistic cis peers. Like if you ask an allistic* cis person why they are the gender they are they will probably say something along the lines of "I just am" while I have like. entire lectures in my mind about my relationship to femininity and masculinity as concepts, my own body, and the non verbal "brain vibes" that are deeply ingrained in my concept of my own gender that are really difficult to sort. Interestingly I think the difficulty with mentalization thing strongly effects how I interact with my own identity, gender or otherwise, because I cannot wrap my head around how other people perceive me. When I was doing my self assessment for my diagnosis I literally texted my friends mid assessment any time a question said something about how other people would describe me because I just don't know. And I cannot understand how the hell other people can just GET that. So when I look at my own identity it is either completely divorced from how other people perceive my identity or it has what my brain can only really interpret as a randomized value or something that requires active research (actively and intentionally asking people what they think about me and what things they associate with me). So like that is A Thing, dunno if its good or bad or neither but it Sure Does Happen *allistic means someone who is not autistic

Wow, Man, THIS WAS EXTREMELY INFORMATIVE, THX

I’m not professionally diagnosed, but I have a very high degree of autistic traits and experiences that only made sense once I had the lens of autism to see them through. I’ve also identified as some variation on non-binary since I knew that was an option (terminology and my awareness of it has evolved a lot in the last fifteen years). I’m really glad that you made it clear that being non-binary is a resolution to gender identity issues, because I spent so much time as a kid feeling very confused about why I didn’t fit in with my female peers, and had quite a bit of distress around my gender, but as soon as I had a third option, it’s something I’ve never been stressed about outside of the nagging concerns of discrimination and political attacks on my right to freely express myself and exist.

I've known quite a few enbies who were also neurodivergent in my time, so I've found the information interesting. Here's the way I see it: If we accept that gender is a sort of social mode that we use to interpret and form social interactions/connections, rather than an aesthetic, social category, or personality trait, then it makes sense that people who might have difficulty understanding/engaging in other social situations might have trouble conceptualizing their gender, or that they might have a more unique relationship to it compared to neurotypical people.

I was diagnosed as autistic in my late 50s. I grew up believing I was a girl because I had a girl body and so was told I was a girl. I dressed like a girl and played with girl’s toys, but preferred jeans and played just as often with my brother’s toys. The problem was that I didn’t behave girly enough for others. I had difficulty relating to girls. Of course, I learned to mask much to the detriment of my mental health. As I got older, I had lots of guy friends but rarely got asked out, right? I thought I was a girl, but I clearly didn’t give off straight girl vibes. Guys would ask me if I was a lesbian. No lie. Adulthood has been quite a journey. Of course, I was expected to get married and have babies. I did eventually get married to a guy who is undiagnosed but probably ND. Babies? No effing way. Pregnancy is body horror for me. If I’d had the misfortune of getting pregnant, my options would have been abortion or suicide. Seven years ago, I was diagnosed with breast cancer and chose to get a double mastectomy. Afterward, I realized that I wish I’d never had them. I’ve spent the better part of the last 12 years writing fiction - imagining being male, female, and gender queer, and I’m definitely the latter. My autism diagnosis and getting old have been gifts because now I embrace who I am, and if NTs don’t like it, they can go to hell. The pressure to conform to gender rules is so damaging to the ND, and that needs to change.

As I understand it, many people with ASD are very analytical and "discrete" thinkers. From their observations they create rules for organizing things, consciously and/or subconsciously, and that tends to create "boxes" in their thinking. If something satisfies a certain set of rules, then it fits in this box or this category. (I see this in myself actually, and I give it some credit for my skill in math/logic/computing. I've been obsessed with those topics for at least a decade, and just recently started a professional career in software) One of my hypotheses is that when such people introspect themselves and see themselves not fitting in like "normal" boys and girls, they conclude that they don't fit in the box and that leads them to try and figure out what they really are. And if they start ticking checkboxes on the other side, or neither side, that might lead to a conclusion that they are X other gender or non-binary. Me personally, I've never had gender identity issues despite not fitting in. I was not like the average guys in my school, but that didn't bother me, I had my own group of similarly nerdy friends. If I learned about gender identity while I was a teenager, I might have gone down that path. But I learned about autism long before that, and I'm satisfied with autism as the answer for my own life experiences.

I am happy to have found you - I kept having the "he's talking about me" sensation, and about 10:00 you mentioned how autistic people treat social interaction in more of a mathematical way... that is when I knew for sure. Yeah, you are talking about me :) I am happy to be your newest subscriber, and thank you in advance for all the knowledge.

Love this video, as an adult autistic and bisexual gnc (gender non-conforming) woman. ❤ ❤ ❤ Funny (sad) thing about accusing children and teens of "faking it": This will just lead all of y'all in unproductive circles. Doctors, parents, children, etc. You will all be frustrated, less efficient and less healthy. The "worst" thing that'll happen if you take a young person's gender issues seriously and learn about them, is that they learn to trust you. That, when they tell you something, you listen and do your best to support. They learn to trust you, because you have shown that YOU trust THEIR judgement of themselves, which is incredibly important in these formative years, and from a proper caretaker. It builds confidence, communication skills, and emotional regulation. Doesn't sound so bad, right? Do this enough, and they will do what all caretakers should appreciate and aim for: come to you when they need help. If you accuse them? If you dismiss them? Simple. They learn that they can't trust you, that WHATEVER they tell, it won't matter to you, and you will try to steer them away - not for their safety, but out of your disapproval of something you don't understand and will not learn about. It will never make them stronger, it will make them angrier, worse at self-preservation, worse at building relationships. You will have failed them. Therefore, even if a young person isn't telling the truth, just testing the waters, or whatever - WHICH IS RARE TO BEGIN WITH - taking them seriously will lead to positive results for everyone in the long run. They will appreciate your honesty and openness and return the favor, even if it takes them a long time.

Ever since I read that there was an above-average correlation between subscribers of /r/autism and /r/transgender, I expected a paper like this one to come out

I was diagnosed with Asperger's at a young age, and I went through the veritable hell with socializing. I am AFAB, and am secure enough with identifying as a woman, but I never felt sold on the whole deal. I act a bit more less female, at least in the way I talk and choose to interact. social conventions, including gender, just don't really stick for most on the spectrum, which I've grown to understand. I've been exploring more identities and ways of expressing myself through time. Thank you for making this video and talking about this subject! It's given me some, as well as others, good insight. :)

This was a great watch as someone who is nonbinary/queer and suspected on the asd spectrum but not yet diagnosed. That 'faking it' was a bad faith question but I really appreciate your way of handling it. Kudos!

I have ASD. I never had gender identity issues per say, but people did think I was gay growing up... not because I acted gay, or had the mannerisms of someone who was gay, but because I was effectively raised by women lol. I had very few positive Male role models. I was always hearing from the people around me about how terrible men were, and all about the patriarchy. So I endeavored to never be like that. And effectively turned into Manny from Modern Family. One particular nasty break up made me realise women were just as flawed and clueless as men were, and I had to sort re-program myself to not hate myself. I would later find out that most people who thought I was gay were actually gay themselves.

i think these studies are super important and interesting! as a nonbinary person with autistic traits, i’m also apprehensive, because a very easy next step to take from these types of questions is “how do we ‘fix’ it?” i don’t want people to look at these studies and use them as an excuse to find the “cause” of these things so that they can “get rid of them.” to be frank, i don’t want eugenicists to get ahold of it.

THIS MAKES SO MUCH SENSE AND ANSWERS SO MANY QUESTIONS I HAD OH MY GOD

When it comes to the final question about what to do if someone is "making up" having gender identity issues, I think people have to keep in mind that being a cis man/woman is a gender identity as well. And as Dr. K explained helping them explore their gender identity issues could help them in that they could realize that they are cisgender. (assuming that they were "making it up"/were unsure)

This really speaks to me. I'm autistic and biologically male, and had a lot of trouble coming to terms with my gender identity growing up. Something interesting in my case is that I had a strong external factor influencing this: the church I grew up in both had strong opinions as to what a man should be, and gave most leadership positions and church duties only to men (and did not look kindly on same-sex marriage or gender reassignment surgery). And this absolutely tanked my dating life too (i.e. I don't feel like I can say I'm a man, so why should I waste these womens' time?). Fortunately, I left after becoming an adult, and finally had the chance to sit down and think/talk about it, and now feel very happy identifying as a man.

Thank you for being kind. I am an Autistic Transmasculine person. I love being me. I don't want to be asked not to be me. I just want to be treated with empathy and love. I don't need to be "fixed". My experience as myself is not the problem. A lack of compassion and love in our society is the problem.

Fantastic breakdown! Learned a lot from this one

Interesting video! I was worried about the implications until you elaborated and talked about how this can be applied in a care environment.

I'm trans, with ADHD and social anxiety. When I found out that autism and ADHD (and Tourette's) are genetically related, I started to wonder about if there might be more to my own condition. So definitely interested in this subject.

I have autism and just don't have a sense of belonging to a certain gender. But have at times questioned if Im trans due to being too far from how my gender is described (concluded that Im not, as I dont hate my body). Always felt a bit confusing how people can have such a clear sense of it and what they assign to it (ever since I learned gender is not just about purely physical traits). I also consider myself to be pretty much in the middle between feminine and masculine in personality, but its hard to estimate yourself. Its interesting to see that they are correlated

You've expressed very very delicately the thoughts I've had concerning the mentalization of people with ASD and how helping that can help with better understanding their gender identity. I think some people don't understand that the untreated autism is what can perhaps cause someone who has ASD to think they're trans when maybe they really aren't. It can be quite harmful to use things such as HRT for someone who isn't actually trans. My friend with untreated autism who went through HRT had a rough time while he was on it, realizing a couple years into his transition that he wasn't a transwoman. I've seen it happen twice firsthand where two separate autistic friends, in an environment with many other genderqueer autistic people, transitioned for 2 years only to realize they weren't transwomen at all and detransitioned. These friends, and many of the others, were mostly undiagnosed or untreated with their autsim because their parents never helped them to cope or mentalize. Therefore, not only are they struggling with their identity, they're struggling to mentalize and understand society and the certain nuances when it comes to gender and are suffering because of it either as a cis or a trans person. I've also seen a story on Reddit where a man said he realized that when he was diagnosed and treated for his autism, he no longer felt gender dysphoria as he had before. I know that some people are afraid that these ideas will cause people to find a way to invalidate being trans as an autistic person, but it's really necessary to understand what type of therapy is best for the person.

This was great. Appreciate your sensitive and inclusive approach.

Incredible explanation of both the meta-analysis and the importance of a person's level of distress in the determination of whether to classify an experience as a "disorder"! The other hypothesis of causation frequently discussed is the idea that people with autism likely also place different levels of importance on social constructs from people labeled as neurotypical, meaning that external gender cues, norms, etc. may also carry less intrinsic importance.

I've struggled my whole life. I was awkward, uncomfortable, didn't know how to communicate well with others. I never fit in anywhere. There was just the assumption from others that I was shy and introverted. I wasn't diagnosed with autism until I was in my mid 20's and it explained so much. So many of my issues made sense, just clicked right into place. It didn't really fix my issues, but it allowed me to understand myself so much better. Ten years later and I'm grappling with gender identity issues as well. Where autism answered so many questions, it feels like being trans may answer the rest. I'm slowly learning to accept myself, and at least in online spaces, I'm starting to present as I'd like. With autism it's already hard to figure out how to fit in and socialize, but when your every example of how to socialize and fit in comes from a gender perspective that doesn't fit you. Well the two issues compound on each other quite a bit. The more I explore my gender identity though, the less sure I am that I'm really introverted. Between autism and gender identity issues. It's always simply been easier to isolate myself than continue to try and conform. I'm disabled, but I often wonder if this isn't a result of a late diagnosis of autism, and the fact it wasn't until I was older that we started openly discussing gender identity issues. With proper diagnosis and support at an earlier age, I'd likely be in a much better position as far as my mental health goes. As is I'm struggling with a lifetime of collected trauma. It's good to see open discussion of how these things are linked and how to support people who are struggling with them.

Very informative, thanks!

I'm nonbinary, have ADHD, and strongly suspect that I may be on the Autism spectrum as well; one thing you said really stood out to me - that the mental distress caused by one or both of the disorders discussed in the video (I would not necessarily call gender identity itself a disorder, though dysphoria is very very real and harmful for some of us), can affect one's ability to form relationships with others. I fully agreed with that, especially based on past experience, until you specified romantic relationships. I have never been in a romantic relationship, by choice, and I would like to suggest an amendment to your statement (which will probably be glaringly obvious to most anyone reading this) - it absolutely affects non-romantic relationships as well. It's extremely frustrating to try to convey certain thoughts and feelings - sometimes you completely understand them and they make perfect sense to you; sometimes you're not fully sure why it's so important to get the point(s) in question across at all - only to have the other person not understand you. They may even completely rebuff you, and you have no clue why. I have 100% lost friends due to my neurodivergence, and if it's happened to someone reading this comment, I hear you. I see you. You are not alone.

This is really fascinating! As someone who spends a lot of time around neurodivergent trans people (thanks tumblr) I definitely noticed this trend and assumed it was just because autistic people end up spending more time questioning the "rules" of society and their place within it. What is gender if not a complicated set of societal rules and expectations? I've certainly spent lots of my time contemplating what exactly it is and where I fit into it! Uh… Maybe I ought to get evaluated as per your advice, hah.

I definitely agree that there's a correlation with gender identity and ASD, but trying to say it all comes down to being "confused about what you really are" is not the case. I have ASD and GID, but ever since I was 5 years old I have had a completely clear and specific sense of my gender identity, and where exactly I fell on what I, even then, perceived as a continuum between male and female. It has always been the clearest thing I know about myself, the strongest and most definite foundation stone of my identity, as I imagine it is for most cisgender people. It is hugely important to point out I grew up in a time before gender identity was discussed at all in the world around me or represented in the media, before the internet. If gay people were brought up it was in purely negative terms, an insult. My parents are homophobic and never discussed anything about it, so I wasn't influenced into being trans by an outside source. I had never heard of the existence of trans people, but that's still what I was, and I vocally told people how I wanted to be identified even when I was still only 5 years old. Of course, it was dismissed and ignored and I was punished for "bad behaviour" every time I mentioned it or I tried to perform in the social role for my internal gender. However, I am now well into adulthood and my gender identity has always remained exactly as it has been since I was a child. In SOME cases of people with ASD, I'm sure there are some elements of confusion at play to be resolved, but confusion is not a blanket explanation for the correlation between ASD and GID. I have never been confused. It is important to mention that I was perfectly self-confident when I was a small child, and likely would have developed quite well socially and functionally if I had been accepted for who I was, and I had been raised socially in my real, internal gender. I believe that many of the problems I now experience with ASD are hugely impacted and worsened by having been made to feel alienated from my body and my social environment throughout my life, because everyone was forcing me to pretend to be a completely different person, of a completely different gender and social role, than I actually was, and everyone expected me to play along with this pretence. With autism we have to mask to appear "normal", and being trans at the same time meant my whole identity- as perceived by others- was a complete fabrication. My whole existence, who people regarded me as, the gendered social roles I was expected to fill, the very name they called me by, all belonged to a completely different person, of a different gender than my internal real self. I would be standing right there, but no one would see or engage with me; they were seeing and engaging with this artificial construct-person, this play-act of who they wanted me to be. As far as anyone else was concerned, my real internal self was invisible and non-existent. There was NO way to emotionally connect with anyone else in these circumstances. There was no way to emotionally connect with myself, or to build any relationship with my own physical body. There was no way to engage with anyone; no way to be proud of anything, because all praise was going to some stranger, this external fabrication, and not to myself. My self and the outer world was at a complete disconnect, so naturally I had no desire to participate and I withdrew. The only thing I can compare it to was like having locked-in syndrome, and I remained locked-in until I was old enough to have independence from other people's control over my life and gained enough vocabulary and terminology to become openly trans. Growing up in this was all hugely impeded my development and made my ASD far, far worse. Honestly, it was immensely painful to have to grow up like this, and I developed severe dissociation to cope. Dissociation hugely exacerbates my autistic interoception problems, but, for me, the disconnect was all very much a RESULT of growing up without acceptance, NOT the CAUSE of being trans. I know this was long, but I really think this all needs to be said because of the medicalisation with which these things are inevitably described- "Here's the genes that turn on gender issues, and we can just turn them right back off!" Or "We can alter the developmental path to make these kids 'normal'!" "They're just confused, we need to teach them who they REALLY are!" (ie. to make them conform.) There is nothing wrong with who I am and who I was born as- What was wrong was the way I was treated. THAT's what needs to change for children and adults going forward, not our genetics, not fundamental elements about who we are as people. More research is always good, but I can really see how many people might take what is stated in this paper as proof that it's possible to force children born with ASD or GID to "become normal".

I'm autistic and gender queer (I don't feel that the idea of gender really applies to me at all). If gender is a social construct, and I don't tap into social stuff very well, it makes sense to me that gender would be something I don't connect to.

Hello. I must say that I am very impressed by your discovery on this paper. And grateful to find your video. Thanks for sharing. I was increasingly amazed and overwhelmed as everything was explained. On the other hand, is so important for me to tell you this: I have a lot of things to share about this. Maybe not a lot, but really deep and important ones, as also personal and direcly related whit the topic Autism / Gender Identity. It's about myself. But also about this pupil I had in an experimental art workshoop I teached for some years, where we meet for the first time. I'm writting this in order to constrain myself and not share this delicate and beautiful memories without asking first. I am sure you could be interested. I have no numbers, not annalisys. Only facts. But facts that matches a lot with your numbers. I feel open and confident to share it, but not so to do it without asking first. Maybe It would be spiring for others. Or maybe you don't comfortable with this emmotional commentary of a stranger posted in your video, I don't know. If you want, I'll share it. If not, It's totally fine. Anyway, thanks again for sharing this info. Is more important than you think. ❤

yeah I know a lot of people with autism and a lot of trans people, I definitely noticed that they do often go together. I wondered if, bc neurodivergent people end up having to do more self-reflection & analyze their behavior, tendencies, traits, etc. more than average out of necessity, they end up figuring out they have gender identity issues more often than the neurotypical people who don't HAVE to analyze their own behavior, tendencies, traits, etc. nearly as much.

I don't know if I have ASD, but I have always had gender identity issues since forever. My relatives always tell me I often act fidgety, ask why I walk in circles, stare at the wall and talk with random objects. Most of these things I barely remember doing because of how automatic they are. I was also pretty bad in school. I didn't have many friends either, it was only a few years after I realized that it was just a couple of actual friends that didn't just use me for their advantage. At 12 I had several hobbies like art and programming, I picked programming and art is still my side hobby, programming is now my profession. I am doing much better. And even though I feel often unconfident in myself, I still think despite anything, whether I have ASD or not, I've managed to push myself through. So, take care folks. Love yourself ✨

This just explained so much thank you.

As a nonbinary autist this research terrifies me. Neurodivergent people are already infantalized and subject to people thinking we can't be in charge of our own minds and bodies. This has a lot of potential to be used against both the autistic and gender non conforming communities

As a queer person on the spectrum, I am glad to see these studies being done. I honestly feel like autism gave me the power to challenge the norms society put on people, instead of comply with them. For me, autism has been the key to the wonderful question of "why?" we must do as society tells us, when it's more comfortable to express ourselves the way we see fit (without the harm of other living beings of course).

I'm a trans man and I've long suspected I was autistic but a lot of my symptoms are also covered by my ADHD diagnosis, so it wasn't apparent enough for me to get tested for it. I think I'll save this video to share with future doctors.

I'm just going to drop my own perspective here (as someone who was diagnosed as an adult). I think we are inherently bad at doing things that will make us fit in. I'm pretty comfortable with that I'm a woman but even as I say that I feel like there's a lot of expectations on womanhood that just don't fit me. I've always just been me and gender hasn't mattered. Because of this I was seen as a tomboy (when in reality I was probably something more in-between). I never cared for a lot of feminine things. I never cared for a lot of ultra masculine things. I've never cared for the typical "successful" life of marrying and having kids. I just want to live my life (single) and do things I enjoy and have fun with my friends. Even something as mundane as this comes across as weird to some which I find so odd. I never understood why people cared so much about what makes others happy. My interests are all rather strange and really intense but they make me happy. In fact, if I'm to live a happy life, I'm utterly incapable of trying to be "normal" and not do all the weird things I do and live my life in this way. I've noticed a lot of autistic individuals also have this "inability" to be anything other than their true selves without being as affected by what society expects of us. I could totally see how this leaves you way more prone to embrace a different gender identity! Or questioning it more in general. There's been times where I've questioned how much of a "woman" I am, but so far I've settled on that I'm just me and I don't mind being called a woman

surely the comments won't be THAT bad

While I've never been diagnosed with ASD, I noticed that some of the symptoms that overlap with that decreased hugely as I came to terms with my Gender Identity. I can now comfortably make eye contact because I'm not worried about feeling jealous of women, or making them feel uncomfortable because I know what male gaze means. And I don't feel the sense of embarrassment looking at men and thinking "I don't fit in with this person, I have nothing in common, but I know I 'should'". I can hold conversation now and talk about myself because I'm not constantly trying to police what I say, and body language, so people don't clock me as not conforming to my expected gender role.

I'm autistic and have always had a strange relationship with gender. I remember when I first heard about gender being a social construct and to my autistic brain that was so obvious I was confused why that wasn't a given. I never realized gender was something some people feel very strongly. I've since learned that my brain sees socially constructed things as "not real" I've had to learn it may not be an immutable, universal constant, but it's real because people experience it. My own gender is a preformance and I like to play different characters. The body is a woman and I have fun with that perception, but I still don't really feel like I get gender. It's just not really my thing

❤❤ thank you for the video ❤️