Are Sword TikToks as Bad as I Expected...?

Рет қаралды 152,694

4 ай бұрын

Some of this stuff makes me feel a little franTICTICKTICKTOCK.. (if you were a metalhead in 2003, you get it).
How much mental pain will I have to inflict upon myself for your entertainment? Well, let's see...
I typed "sword" into the search on TikTok and picked particularly odd videos to react to and comment on. Also poke fun at, in case of a particularly flabbergasting case of clickbait marketing. In the words of the Angry Video Game Nerd: "What were they thinking?!"
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"Cavern of Wonders" by Hitctrl
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"Water Temple" by El Corleo
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Outro:
"Highland Storm" by The Slanted Room Records
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#skallagrim #tiktokvideo #reaction #sword #katana #funny

Пікірлер: 1 000

@Skallagrim 4 ай бұрын

I'm hoping that the first one is satire. Could have used a sarcastic tone of voice to indicate it... on the internet you never know, after all. Either satire or AI generated. It's just too absurd to be real... right?

@jasonhare8540 4 ай бұрын

Literally said the same thing then looked up and saw we're on the same page 🤔🤣🤣🤣🤣

@Benw8888 4 ай бұрын

I think it's satire

@dexterion5940 4 ай бұрын

It's a Tik tok Skal...What did you expected,educational guide?

@IPostSwords 4 ай бұрын

It's just that companies weird method of advertising. It's over the top, sarcastic, dumb anime sword memes to sell over the top, dumb anime swords with absurd profit margins.

@nonsequitor 4 ай бұрын

Neither: it's what happens when idiots meet mass market clickfarming with assistance from non native speakers via AI scriptwriting - and as neither the creators or the intended viewers have any idea what they're taking about, there's nothing pushing back 🤦‍♂️🤷‍♂️🤦‍♂️

@flinchfu 4 ай бұрын

It's AI generated dialogue. That's why it's 100% nonsensical.

@ehsanrahee7411 4 ай бұрын

That was my first thought, and it became more and more apparent to me that that's the case

@seanrush3723 4 ай бұрын

Ai dialogue makes me run my eardrums through

@GlidingZephyr 4 ай бұрын

@@ehsanrahee7411The narrator was reciting the dialogue like he would from a script, too. My brain hurts, now.

@lasskinn474 4 ай бұрын

it's dishonest text written by a person. think about the become a lord in scotland adcopy and it's website, none of it makes sense as a whole and it's not supposed to make sense as a whole, the idea is to someone to buy something they can say is a joke item later. it hardly matters if it's ai generated or made as a filler clickbait by a person hitting keys. it'll make just as much sense. "this is not a normal katana its shaped like a sword" etc, it's been basic idiocy level advert writing for like a decade now.

@RetiredRhetoricalWarhorse 4 ай бұрын

See, I thought the internet had already made people dumber to a degree that was getting to be really scary... I wonder how low we'll be able to go now...

@yjlom 4 ай бұрын

katana: no handle, not sword-shaped, blunt, bronze, as expensive as 2000 modern fighter jets got it

@Skallagrim 4 ай бұрын

The price at least is a joke related to the One Piece character, but the rest... unless it's a references I'm not getting it's just... huh?

@Arkancide 4 ай бұрын

@@Skallagrim The comments help explain. Apparently the character is named Law. Tiktok is cancer, and I can't stand young people. (fellow millennial)

@Skallagrim 4 ай бұрын

@@Arkancide Yeah, that's what I pointed out in the video.

@Arkancide 4 ай бұрын

@@Skallagrim Oops. Still waking up, carry on.

@CazadorSlayer 4 ай бұрын

So what you are saying is a katan is actually a bronze dildo? Today I learned!

@Philocyb1n 4 ай бұрын

THE BLADE IS UNIQUE , ITS MADE FROM CARBON STEEL AND SHARP

@bloodlove93 4 ай бұрын

you are unique, you have skin and bones,unlike the rest of us.

@Maedhros0Bajar 4 ай бұрын

To be fair, my sharp carbonsteel Kriegsmesser is obviously not a sword, but a knife. Seriously though, I hope whoever made that was joking

@Tanzenergise 4 ай бұрын

@@bloodlove93 that is true, i'm only bone RATTLE EM BOYS!!!

@SanityTV_Last_Sane_Man_Alive 4 ай бұрын

as opposed to most swords that are made out of spaghetti, and shaped like a hammer.

@milire2668 4 ай бұрын

@@bloodlove93 *- Mark Zzzzzuckerberg

@georgedeng8646 4 ай бұрын

"Enema sword" thats the most terrifying thing I have heard of. Should be in a Dark souls game.

@doomspud6302 4 ай бұрын

The chosen weapon of the LOATHSOME DUNG EATER!!!

@bloodlove93 4 ай бұрын

charge attack, kancho of eternity,the everlasting butt burn does dark souls have charge attacks, idk and idc.

@DeHerg 4 ай бұрын

Would not be surprised if it was a game translated from Japanese. (With chances being 50/50 for it to be an incorrect translation or not)

@CyberVonCyberus 4 ай бұрын

@@bloodlove93 Yeah, you can charge heavy attacks and in Elden Ring spells can also be charged

@b0t123 4 ай бұрын

it's kinda hot ngl

@robertl6196 4 ай бұрын

"Fuzzy Tsuba" would be a great name for an all-girl Japanese pop-band.

@melee-dexterdexterious2878 4 ай бұрын

You're right, hopefully the band would have gained a better world wide recognition than Japanese all girl pop-band Speed.

@GoblinSquid 4 ай бұрын

It would be a better name for an all-boy weeb band tbh.

@jonathanwienke512 4 ай бұрын

It sounds like some kind of hentai innuendo to me...🤯

@mrslasher1064 4 ай бұрын

"this sword isn't like other swords because it has a handle" *W H A T ?*

@stax6092 4 ай бұрын

Yes, the classic Sword without a handle. No real reason to take a sword out of it's sheath or anything.

@dragonslayer3552 4 ай бұрын

And it's SHARP ???!!! BRO what ??!!! In my life I have never seen a sharp sword

@crusaderking9328 3 ай бұрын

I mean without a handle, at least there's something to say about equality. While you're hurting your opponent, you're slicing your own hand. Seems fair, doesn't it? ;)

@tryxxor 2 ай бұрын

I guess he meant katana instead of sword, a katana is just the blade without anything attached to it but i still doesnt make any sense

@dragonslayer3552 2 ай бұрын

@@tryxxor wtf are you on about katanas have handles... How do you think people held them by the sharp blade ?

@hankj.wimbleton_gamer-madn2412 4 ай бұрын

from the first 2 seconds i already had brain damage

@nyx3988 4 ай бұрын

Same

@SergioLeonardoCornejo 4 ай бұрын

Imagine the effect it has on people who consume TikTok content regularly.

@bloodlove93 4 ай бұрын

that's the "magic" of tiktok...pure concentrated brain rot

@getdown464 4 ай бұрын

nah man this isn't brain damage, this is brain necrosis

@Agelessreaper121 4 ай бұрын

@@SergioLeonardoCornejo actually scary...

@GreatSageSunWukong 4 ай бұрын

that glass/plastic sword would look really good on a wall with some LED lighting to make it look like a fantasy ice blade sort of thing

@justinbremer2281 4 ай бұрын

Or on a cosplay

@poilboiler 4 ай бұрын

Or red to make it glow like magma. Green would look amazing as well. Need a lot of walls.

@Skallagrim 4 ай бұрын

That would be awesome, yeah.

@CrizzyEyes 4 ай бұрын

@@justinbremer2281 best part is all you'd need to do is tape a few cyan LEDs to it to achieve the effect portably

@kemarisite 4 ай бұрын

My reaction to that one was to flash back to the glass daggers filled with green ... acid (?) used by Milady in The Four Musketeers (1974).

@kanamisprs4330 4 ай бұрын

Pommels are so old skool, tickle him rightly with your fluffy tsuba. Thats real swordsmanship.

@MonkeyJedi99 4 ай бұрын

Dang, I was drinking iced tea when I read your comment, nearly choked to death.

@tamsinashton2293 4 ай бұрын

Tickle him rightly. 😂. That tickled my sense of humour.

@Bogdin7 4 ай бұрын

How to go from Swordsmanship to Relationship.

@TheFallenSHDW 2 ай бұрын

Striking the back to disgrace your enemy: ❌ Tickle them with your fuzzy tsuba: 👌

@planescaped 4 ай бұрын

I've never been on Tik Tok in my life, and I feel incredibly smug about that.

@TheScottishbear 4 ай бұрын

You're not the only one my friend

@danielantony1882 4 ай бұрын

Hell yeah, my fellow follower of truth.

@BeachTypeZaku 4 ай бұрын

You're doing yourself a favor and I can't stress that enough.

@goldenageofdinosaurs7192 4 ай бұрын

Just feel fortunate. That place is a factory for lowering IQ’s. I actually think it’s quite dangerous to us as a species (social media in general).

@maastomunkki 4 ай бұрын

Stay that way, unless you wish to inflict upon yourself instant brain trauma. I had one short look on someone else's phone and my IQ got halved. Now I can no longer even find my shoelaces let alone tie them..

@ApexZer0 4 ай бұрын

That saint anger joke was top tier

@1IGG 4 ай бұрын

I didn't even recognise the song. It was so meh, I ignored it when it released.

@EricLinstone 4 ай бұрын

I *really* wanted to like that album but I just could not. It's the only CD I ever threw in the trash. And I stayed with them through Load and Reload.

@Kishandreth Ай бұрын

Thanks for clarifying that joke... I stopped listening to their new stuff because it couldn't hold a candle to ride the lightning. I never listened to the whole album.

@Hankbob_Hillpants 4 ай бұрын

4:40 ah yes, my favourite weapon, a sounding rod on a stick

@Lilith-Rose 4 ай бұрын

A sounding rod for horses at that

@jimbob3332 4 ай бұрын

I mean... I'd be terrified.

@brian_sipe 4 ай бұрын

*_Kirsche has entered the chat_*

@jakubmaj4975 4 ай бұрын

@@brian_sipe Never have I ever expected a Kirsche reference under this kind of video.

@massilcabanas34 4 ай бұрын

"Well... speaking of melons" 😂

@Draslia Ай бұрын

It's almost summer after all!

@terragamer7142 4 ай бұрын

4:18 "CLEARLY this is not intented to be functional" -Skallagrim while talking about a glass sword

@withoutdaysofficial 4 ай бұрын

Glad I'm not the only one who caught that lol

@adamlanglois563 4 ай бұрын

That app is from the part of the map where it says "here be monsters" where brain cells go to die

@Slayerlord13 4 ай бұрын

I saw someone somewhere call Tiktok something along the lines of "the next generation of Facebook boomers"

@Loki_Firegod 4 ай бұрын

The crochet sword one was actually really funny, couldn't agree more :D Apart from that, I've now had a couple more reasons to stay away from TikTok. Thanks! Also, because I know you can use the feedback: Great (and very funny) video, as always. No matter how badly the algorithm treats you, I always enjoy when you upload something new, and usually it either makes me laugh, or teaches me something I didn't know before, or sometimes both. Thanks and see you on (or under/next to) the next one. :)

@jonaswerner8480 4 ай бұрын

2:58 "barbabianca: where do you put it exactly?" Highly underrated comment

@GlidingZephyr 4 ай бұрын

By my own admission, I have a sizable collection of "tacticool" sharp implements. Some are more serviceable than others. What I don't have are a bunch of cheap katanas. Even though I was a complete weeb while I was a teenager and young adult (the mid and late 1990's into the early 2000's, respectively). Have I missed out? Do I need to see what TikTok has to say, on the matter? No, I didn't. And I don't.

@IPostSwords 4 ай бұрын

Gonna take a wild guess and say "yes". Sure, it's not all terrible. But the vast majority is.

@BlazingSteel 4 ай бұрын

SellswordArts does better short-form content that has, well, content, and is quite informative.

@Lord_Marquaad 4 ай бұрын

Don't forget robinsword

@BlazingSteel 4 ай бұрын

@@Lord_Marquaad Them too. I like that Robinsword has a more scholar look while SellswordArts does more of a devilish swashbuckler duelist.

@gangrenousgandalf2102 4 ай бұрын

*ahem * Minikatana-

@IPostSwords 4 ай бұрын

@@gangrenousgandalf2102 my opinions on MK are public record. No need to *ahem* about it

@Knoloaify 4 ай бұрын

The first video was probably translated from Mandarin using machine translation and AI voice-over. 3 Chinese ads on Tiktok uh, who would have thought.

@gman1515 4 ай бұрын

Either that or it was stolen content that was run through an AI to reword things slightly. All depends on whether or not there was a legitimate link to buy the sword

@galactigo4463 4 ай бұрын

Minikatana rarely uses computer generated voice overs but I can see why you’d think that

@tirionpendragon 4 ай бұрын

The first clip you showed could have one shotted a bear totem barbarian for the amount of psychic damage it dealt.

@ronwingrove683 4 ай бұрын

The words "fuzzy tsuba" will be forever etched in a cursed place somewhere deep in my soul.

@eddys.3524 4 ай бұрын

"It's a sword, Skall... but not as we know it.."???

@Elriuhilu 4 ай бұрын

"Samurai off the starboard bow, starboard bow, starboard bow!"

@TheGREYPELT 4 ай бұрын

Swords cannae change the laws of physics, laws of physics, laws of physics!

@c99kfm 4 ай бұрын

"We come in piece, cut to kill, oops it broke!"

@taurengraybeard218 4 ай бұрын

My favorite way to start the day. Pedantic sword nerd commentary. Thank you Skal. 🖤

@grimreaper_cz 4 ай бұрын

This is the first time I dread what videos Skall will watch

@graywolfdracon 4 ай бұрын

Thanks for taking one for the team. Only time I watch something on Tic Tok is when somebody on KZfaq makes fun of it on their channel.

@JustGrowingUp84 4 ай бұрын

These were so crazy, my two remaining brain cells beat themselves to death through high-speed collisions with the inner wall of my skull. Then they got raised as undead brain cells, and immediately started wailing on each-other with giant corkscrews that have fuzzy tsubas. Considering their undead status, this situation will probably continue for the foreseeable future.

@crusaderking9328 3 ай бұрын

Maybe giving them sharp swords without handels, might help to resolve the situation more quickly.

@TommyBaggins 4 ай бұрын

The only thing missing from these tiktoks is The Catfish Knife. Y'all remember The Catfish Knife? The one that "stares into your soul with its dead, hate-filled eye." I can't stop laughing at the thought of that thing showing up on tiktok.

@Zaznin 4 ай бұрын

Skall 😂 I was not prepared for this level of sass from a source other than my mirror so early in my morning. Thank you! 😂😂

@plumaDshinigami 4 ай бұрын

TikTok is the fastest way to rot braincells.

@theperfectbotsteve4916 3 ай бұрын

"it has a handle which most swords lack." that line did more damage than a sword

@augiedad54 4 ай бұрын

I follow you for the sword-talk, but you possess a truly entertaining sense of humor. Keep up the good work!

@Skallagrim 4 ай бұрын

Thanks!

@lanigirognithemos 4 ай бұрын

I think the first video was trolling. You got me with the cliffhanger watermelon 🤣🤣🤣 Every time Zoro calls his sword I keep thinking enema too 🤣

@cloudycat8178 2 ай бұрын

for the youtube stuffs, happy to see you still making stuff even if this one was late to my feed. Take care!

@haydnmalyon7690 4 ай бұрын

Loved hearing the respectful mention of Robinswords. You two are my go-to sword guys.

@djeeno 4 ай бұрын

my brain started itching at some parts but what caught my eye most was the incredibly overpowered cuts ninja-bro was doing. I mean, his form was... something, but he swung a light two-handed sword as if it was a lead pipe he was going to bludgeon someone with.

@AdamCeladin 4 ай бұрын

Haha great video Skall! Tik Tok is so cringe full of fake videos and ,,Influencers,, :D

@janhornak5739 4 ай бұрын

Hi Adam, didn´t expected you here, more like Jakub or Lukáš🙏🙇⛩

@AdamCeladin 4 ай бұрын

@@janhornak5739 Haha i am friend with Skall at least 10+ years we made some collabs together ,))

@shawnespinoza9300 4 ай бұрын

I am glad I found this channel! Total hilarious! Keep up the good work.

@flyingninja1234 4 ай бұрын

I can only imagine the alternate universe, where everything is Crochet. That sword would scare people.

@jonathanwienke512 4 ай бұрын

I suspect the raison d etre of the fuzzy tsuba is that some people can't find anything unless it has hair around it.

@Umbral_Choir 4 ай бұрын

Even this limited and filtered exposure to that accursed platform gave me a severe case of brainrot. The damage cannot ever be undone.

@Segalmed 4 ай бұрын

All a Chinese commie plot, no doubt. :-)

@koenkooiman1490 4 ай бұрын

Haha, awesome video😂 would love to see you do this more often 😁👍 not solely ofcourse, just more often.

@shkotayd9749 4 ай бұрын

We could feel your brain cracking trying to pore through that material bahaha xD

@megasuperhyperspeed 4 ай бұрын

I'd wiped the trauma of st anger from my memory. Thanks for the flashbacks

@terra6713 4 ай бұрын

Thanks for reinforcing my decision to avoid TikTok xd

@StarMystro 4 ай бұрын

Great video! I love your humor Skall. "Fuzzy tsuba" lol

@Hatsworthful 4 ай бұрын

5:21 "the anatomically correct duck"

@devastationofmankind3495 4 ай бұрын

"it also has a handle witch most sword dont have..." Me: dafuq?...ammm, ACORDING TO FCKING WHO?!?!?!...

@madmalkavian3857 4 ай бұрын

Yeah swords with handles are weird. Makes it difficult to attach to my arm like a normal person would.

@devastationofmankind3495 4 ай бұрын

@@madmalkavian3857 right right...or you can allways use the force sir.

@frantisekvrana3902 4 ай бұрын

3:23 Certainly not for self defense. The unscrewing and screwing back in of the knobby part would take way too long.

@camb06 4 ай бұрын

For some reason, KZfaq had stopped suggesting your stuff to me for quite a while. I’d forgotten how much I just enjoyed listening to you talk.

@rinnsbebelindegrombe 4 ай бұрын

Nice to hear of you again. god påske!

@xGreenMtnx 4 ай бұрын

Love your videos Skallagrim

@Brruhmine 4 ай бұрын

I might be wrong but the thing in 4:45 might be a "stylised" version of a Chinese Sword Mace/Bar Mace or Sword Breaker It's basically a bludgeoning weapon like a mace that is shaped like a sword

@Skallagrim 4 ай бұрын

Original Chinese bar maces are mostly shaped like swords, yeah. This thing... not so much.

@Brruhmine 4 ай бұрын

@@Skallagrim yeah it does look like one of those self defense pleasure masters which are apparently called keu chain strickers but longer lol. But u know close enough lmaooo

@Alepap. 2 ай бұрын

"This is not your normal katana, it's shaped like a sword" wat

@netherslayer3561 4 ай бұрын

Thank you for your sacrifice. And, my condolences; those first few really hurt

@jgbizarro2726 4 ай бұрын

4:15 made with the best material for a sword: diamond

@stonedape3285 4 ай бұрын

Netherite is better tho

@purplelibraryguy8729 4 ай бұрын

Diamond might be too brittle.

@antonakesson 4 ай бұрын

Wow. New channel logo, eh? Nice

@vladimirkovacevic1656 4 ай бұрын

hilarious video skall,cool new profile picture

@alexmendoza3265 4 ай бұрын

I never comment on videos but you had me on floor with Fuzzy tsuba. 😂

@darkner2390 4 ай бұрын

I spent years growing this brain of mine only to lose half of it to the very first TikTok video.

@CruelDwarf 4 ай бұрын

First clip sounds like someone narrated Ali express lot description and turned it into tiktok video. It is my working theory.

@Bargadiel 4 ай бұрын

Chinese content farms try very hard. The sad part is this garbage still gets millions of views because children use the platform.

@thereplyguyreviews 4 ай бұрын

The amount of brain hemorrhaging I suffered within the first 3 minutes was incredible

@zoromax10 3 ай бұрын

I could watch this for like 3 hours straight, please do more

@Bogdan-oc1fm 4 ай бұрын

My brain is dead by dis monstrositi

@atrocious7766 3 ай бұрын

Niarb a evah llits uoy tsael ta.

@artwald1619 4 ай бұрын

So you want to get pedantic? Not every functional sword is made of carbon steel. Bronze/Iron swords are functional too! ( : They should be sharp though...

@MarkWiseTechno 4 ай бұрын

The glass wall-hanger was cool AF

@Diva_4720 3 ай бұрын

Skal, the crochet one was actually good, I'm impressed 👏

@houayangthe3rd 4 ай бұрын

Made by Chinese ticktocker using AI to speak English. Ticktock was a mistake, or was AI, or the Chinese, or maybe it was the friend we made.

@Brruhmine 4 ай бұрын

7:12 "so clearly there's good content even on tiktok" *Skips shadiversity at the start* Classic lmao

@SteveGBD 4 ай бұрын

i am laughing so loud! the faces while you judge the narration!! not the fuzzy tsuba LMAO

@odstpsych4702 4 ай бұрын

Why Skall, why, as an elder Millennial I had effectively scrubbed that song from my brain. Now it will never go away. Love you anyway. Keep up the good work.

@ignatz14 4 ай бұрын

Sword Technology will surely make huge leaps with the invention of handles and sharp blades. Can't wait to see where this goes :D

@Cranberry76 4 ай бұрын

I enjoy all your videos, but this one made me laugh and I don't laugh easily xD

@k0lpA 4 ай бұрын

1:00 lol the number even ends with a coma $3,000,000, wtf

@Skallagrim 4 ай бұрын

Guess it didn't fit the stupid vertical format. :D

@Stegopelon 4 ай бұрын

“I’m sure y did “ from like 1st minute i am sure this gonna be gold 😂

@TheGigashadow 4 ай бұрын

Love ya Skall, I just wish your videos were longer.

@metalassassin8841 2 ай бұрын

I feel old now....Thanks Skall!

@EdwardNavu 4 ай бұрын

Glad that I'm not alone with allgery from clickbaits

@jbeckley6849 4 ай бұрын

Skallagrim's soul died a little watching these TikToks.

@christopherdunn8767 3 ай бұрын

Almost spat out my tea at that St Anger joke. That was amazing.

@hendrix24 3 ай бұрын

Thank you for subjecting yourself to the hell that is tiktak for our amusment. For what its worth I really enjoyed your reactions to all the silliness. I would gladly watch a part 2 if you can tolerate another excursion.

@saaaaaaaaalt838 3 ай бұрын

I'm convinced more than half of these are procedurally generated ads. No humans involved.

@Le_Rappel_des_oiseaux 4 ай бұрын

"Well, speaking of melons..." XD

@ChrisLeeW00 4 ай бұрын

I wasn’t quite sure what I was looking at until I noticed the fuzzy tsuba, it’s a sword 😂

@lukewilliams8548 4 ай бұрын

Your sacrifice for our entertainment has not gone unapretiated.

@reaperwithnoname 4 ай бұрын

Thank you for putting what little is left of your sanity on the line for us.

@chasebh89 2 ай бұрын

"i shouldn't judge an entire platform by one video" In this case you absolutely should

@Leubast 4 ай бұрын

That went better than expected.

@DanHiteshew-oneandonly 2 ай бұрын

the crochet sword gag was great.

@HebuTheLoneWolf 4 ай бұрын

5:21 DuckDong >:D also thx for making my brain hurt xD

@francobuzzetti9424 4 ай бұрын

hello Skall! i have quite an odd video request. I don't know if you did this already or not, but me and I'm sure more people would be interested in a hair video or short just to see what you use and how you style your hair , i've been following for years and you always had great style!