This is so relevant because Maya Angelou was a close friend to Oprah. She believed in her before other did and Oprah reciprocate the same energy. They are both women who suffers great trauma and manages to turn those tears into gold. So, in someway, I feel like this quote was indeed talking about Oprah.

@Late to the Game So by who is it then? Every source I find cites Maya Angelou.

Late to the Game Maya said it long before that.

Favourite quote 🥰

Best Quote ever

Wrong, i remember both.

you're absolutely correct

that's why i record by writting every conversation i have with my crush

yeah thats a bit wrong lol, of course you remember what others say, otherwise you are just not listening or dont care

@@halolime117 men vs women.

watch oprah's interview of meghan / harry , it is not genuinely at all - it was so fake both sides.

❤️

Which she seems able to do with most people, with one big exception. Even when corrected, she is convinced that atheists are incapable of feeling awe. She seems to view us as some miserable creatures, rather than someone who just isn’t convinced that a god exists, particularly those posited by early humans. People who often first became disillusioned with their religious group because they couldn’t square their compassion for others, with the brutality and bigotry in the scriptures.

​@@katelynnehansen8115 Most christians aren't convinced a god exists as well. If they were they wouldn't sin. The Bible isn't a book, it's a compilation of books from different writers so there's no consistency in the message. That's why I call myself christian again after years of being atheist. I sympathize with the knowledge of Jesuschrist spread out across the four gospels a lot more tĺhan with the Old Testament'book. I don't care about what Oprah thinks of atheists becase wheter we are all atheists or we are all christians

@@marcospina162 I understand where you’re coming from. However, there are several issues I see. The gospels have differing and contradictory stories that were all written many decades after when Jesus was supposed to have lived, and I have no way of distinguishing what of it, is actually true. In some gospels he comes across as more of a gentle preacher of kindness and forgiveness, or a miracle worker. I must note that in modern day, we see “miracle workers” with thousands of avid supporters, who are consistently proven to be frauds. In other gospels, he is a death cult leader, telling people to turn on their family and follow him, because the world was going to end in monstrous Armageddon even before all of his disciples were passed away. I have learned enough about mythologies and their history, origins, and evolution, to understand how the major religions came about. How religion started out as nature and sun worship. As we became more aware and dominate as a species, we started imagining gods as more powerful versions of ourselves, and for some regions, it became a singular powerful being. It was our best way back then of explaining reality. Of course a raging storm, erupting volcano, or crippling disease, without the tools, time, or reasoning skills to understand it, would seem like powerful angry god/s doing it on purpose. So theism has evolved like languages. You could call Christianity and Islam, daughter religions of Judaism, which itself was influenced by the Zoroastrianism and Sumerian myths that came before it. Trouble is, from back to ancient Egyptian days, conmen claimed that they and their family were from the gods, or that they could speak to god, or their group was chosen by gods. And many groups got progressively more brutal to those who didn’t accept their tales and allow them rule. I would argue that the Abrahamic religions spread not because they were true or good, but because they were brutal. They spread through bloody war, horrific torture, colonization, and intense indoctrination. They did and do, deny reality to maintain faith, sometimes to the extent of killing or imprisoning a clever human that learned something new about our universe, which happened to disagree with the accepted mythology. It’s impossible to quantify or describe the amount of suffering inflicted in the rise to power. The loss of knowledge and progression as a species. The loss of empathy and ability to have a reason based morality, rather than what some dude said a god said. Those that converted and survived seem to have Stockholm. So to sum up, if there’s a slim chance you read this far: I think it’s highly unlikely that most of the Bible is anything more than a collection of folklore spread by the sword and through oppressive tactics, and I believe it’s caused irreparable harm to humanity. If you already don’t really accept the bulk of the Bible, if you already have to use your own senses to choose what you follow, and if it’s pages are stained red with all the blood shed in its name, why continue to stand by it? Why only divorce yourself from the OT when I’d argue the NT is in many ways more disturbing?

Good summary

Thank you

Good summary but to people just scrolling through the comments please actually watch the video lol

Good notes :3

@@ellahope3654 doing both at the same time help sm tho. I would love if the video was chopped up

CheesecakeLasagna daamn

😂

midblown

Bio, those of science which would often claim too be this world's universal truth, rarely are willing to listen... Based upon their perspective, now ask yourselves: Why should they? What can they learn from you, which they cannot learn from their tools, perspective and intellect? Or even already know so well? *Everything* else, which in my world view is endless of worth, a deep infinite ever changing seanof possibility for great joy and the advancement in human nature.

Very true

*Vulnerable.

Silver Knight I don't think she makes them feel vulnerable, they look like they feel safe opening up to her.

my son draws and did a picture of oprah. we want to give it to her. how do we meet her?

Her ability goes far beyond comfort, we taught her how to bring and lead towards ecstasy

except when she interviewed the olsen twins - she was rather rude there

Cool

OFC NOT IN A SEXUAL WAY IMAGINE SOMEONE OPENING UP TO YOU SO YOU PUT UR HAND ON THIER PRIVATES 😭😭

Summary comments are the best

Sitting too close is uncomfortable tho

Do this to me and I'm gone lol

Oprah is an INFJ too! its a wonderful gift INFJ's have :)

I am also an INFJ and I concur.

Agreed

Agreed! The problem is we become everyone's therapist without any reciprocity. 😕

@@pinktigergirl23 I think Oprah is an ENFJ

Absolutely agree with you Laurie.This has certainly been my experience.

Someone mentioned up in the comments that they don't believe Oprah is an introvert. Which made me scoff. Very CLEARLY she is an introvert, because she UNDERSTANDS people and their struggles and doesn't ask for anything back. When you're the one doing the listening, of course you're an introvert. And of course none of these people reciprocate back to Oprah and ask about HER. I'm very similar. I can listen to people all day long and people feel very connected to me because I'll listen to them, but they aren't my friends because the relationship will always be about them. I'm very certain I was a therapist in my past life, but I try very hard to force myself to not make that kind of connection with every person I meet because it's extremely emotionally exhausting. Even when I've seen Oprah on Ellen, she ALWAYS mentions how she doesn't have any friends, and I feel like nobody ever listens to her say that or believes that because she is Oprah and a billionaire she must have hundreds of friends. But I know she doesn't. It's a very lonely life being the one everyone turns to when they want to talk and that's all people want from you. Oprah also tells Ellen that she is one of her only real friends, which makes me sad. But I also relate because I really only consider a couple of people to be my friends.

That is so true. I'm not exactly sure how to deal with that dimension. Sometimes I think that once you've opened up that space, you also have to take responsibility for the fact that that moment is really about the other person.

I dont mean to Talk myself up but ive been this type of person since i was a kid. You are 100% correct. I learned the hard way. but i still appreciate that people feel comfortable and safe around me to open up/be themselves.

Skyler Love wow ok hi soul twin, same. I feel like therapist type people often have soo many people who trust them but very few true friends, and even with those they still rather focus on their friend's problems then voicing their own. It can def feel very lonely when you think that your closest friends dont truly know who you are, because that leads to the questions, so how can they really love you?

Bakunin really. I kinda notice that too. I really want to see the the studies. Can you send me a link?

Male touch out of order creeps people out, like he mentions in the video. You can't go hugging strangers, but I love hugs and flirty arm touches from my guy friends.

Dr. Oz seems to do a lot of touching though not as much lately, probably because of the Me Too movement.

Dr.Oz is a very good male platonic toucher. It's all about the vibe you give. If you're overly touchy with a crying girl because you think she's attract and trying to get "some" people will sense it. But if you genuinely wanna comfort people no matter the gender or looks nobody will ever call you a creep. My brother for example. He is quick to comfort and give hugs to vulnerable people looking for understanding. He actually LISTENS to what the person has to say and gives them validation that they deserved to be listened to. No matter the gender, age, look, or status people open up to him. He got that from my father who was a physical therapist. A very emotional and empathy demanding job working with resently disabled people due to accidents. What I'm trying to say is people can sense your intentions especially if you're touching them. Most young guys unfortunately are only quick to comfort pretty girls because they want something out of it. Don't do that and you'll be just fine.

It's not that a male touch is "creepy", it's because many men haven't learned to listen to their emotions based off of how they were raised/ what happened in their life. I've had men touch me who have a genuinely caring touch that feels comforting. It's just difficult to find them.

Oh I hear that.. It's so draining. Impossible to not care but so hard to be affected so long.

It's important that you also have someone who cares about you and listen to you

Yes, I feel other people's feelings so much that for my own sanity I do at times have to close myself up or wall myself up.

I have to remind myself of this all the time: just like you listen to other people and their emotions, listen to yourself and your emotions so you feel seen and heads and can take care of yourself and your needs

I agree this video is not universally applicable. Eye contact and touching can come off as rude and aggressive in many cultures

Touching? Absolutely not. I don't want a stranger touching me...

eye contact is not aggressive or rude or presumptuous in asian cultures - if anything, touching is. i’ve never heard of eye-contact being off-putting in filipino culture at all.

A lot of the things he says in his videos sometimes apply to the USA but not to a lot of European countries. So the gap with even farther cultures may be bigger.

I think this video is more catered to America, in some countries it’s still extremely common for people to touch you in conversation, from my experience at least in the Arab world and the Spanish world people do it all the time

Mill S that’s a great question. You can easily fake things like confidence and power, but genuine interest in others is almost impossible to fake. And genuine interest is unfortunately something that so many people lack.

Zisha Stilitz Oh yeah that makes a lot of sense! Thanks for the insight!

If they're genuinely charismatic then they will be genuine in their behaviour. I focus quite a lot on non-verbal communication on my channel and one of the key things is that there's so much subtlety in how we communicate that it's insanely hard to fake your charisma. That's why even actors when acting will get so invested in a part or think back to personal experience to convey emotions.

I think they have an unconscious ability, but when you do this for work, you may hone your abilities consciously. My whole life people have always opened up to me, even when it was unwanted. Can't tell you how many times I've been standing at a bus stop and some random person ended up telling me their life story and struggles through tears. I've always been a patient listener. I don't compete for attention or just wait my turn to talk. I've also been told I have a "kind face" and approachable demeanor so I think some of it may be related to looks that are outside our control. I've had homeless people tell me they were surprised by the fact that I didn't act afraid of them or ignore them. Treating people with respect goes a long way. As well as being non-judgemental. Just allow people to vent, don't judge, and try to be empathetic. Some people say that victims have a certain "aura" that other victims (and perpetrators) can sense. Like you just intuitively understand this person has been through a lot and will understand your suffering. I don't know if I believe that, but I do seen to be a magnet for these kinds of people. Not being easily aggitated when people get emotional also helps. If you can appear moved, yet still calm, it strikes that balance of being emotionally-impacted yet still grounded enough to be a stabilizing force for the person breaking down.

Heather Bryant oh wow that’s interesting. Do you like having that ability to talk to people like that or do you ever feel like it’s just too much information?

That's a beautiful message. It goes back the other way too, by giving and loving others, you feel happier about yourself.

I'm Glad for you, I've been that way with a Family Member, Putting My Full Faith in them, Loving Unconditional and giving my Full Attention but it back fired! Now I get "Your Too Caring and Spoil Me". Now I get No credit, there is no winning.

Caring for others is a common trait among humans. Be very careful about calling an act of care for someome as love. Love takes time and effort, investment worth great rewards. But, love is a privelege. Caring for stangers, is very very different from investing into the people you might not like all the time, but you choose to be there for them, even when they don't appear to be in pain, or needing your genrerosity, which is when we normally 'care' for strangers.

@ True. We come with nothing, and go with nothing. Some say there is freedom in that fact.

Generic Scout You are so right 🙌🏾

I can confirm this lmao, i always look at my boss eyes while hes talking to all of us and he mostly turns to look at me at that moment. It could be because they feel they are being heard

omg my teachers always do this with me

Having this amount of self-awareness I think is a huge step towards #3

#3 requires trust and effort on both sides. ❤

uve said it

calm voice !

Brilliant. Thank you for identifying all these insights for Oprah's master skill in an excellent way! I will definitely practice this. I took Causative Communication workshop by Ingrid Gudenas and she teaches many of these concepts. It is great to see such a great example of these concepts. Thank you!

Interpreting what you've just seen as "exploiting" says a lot about you, my friend. Authentically caring about others vs. "exploiting" them becomes apparent quickly. All good things in this world have a shadow side, the biggest lesson will be learned when you find yourself alone without long-lasting, enduring friendships because you believe your intent to "exploit" will pave the way for success and riches. It may happen, but the suffering you cause and the cost will be equally great.

I let the first “exploit” go but the second is just slightly sus.

@@janiceshayne8193 all narcissists think they’re clever. They only play themselves and end up alone.

I agree with everything except touch, I hate being touched unnecessarily, unless it's my family or man.

Exactly would I commented in another video similar to this one I hear you but the only thing we could really do is try and see where what happens if we fail we keep trying

You are not alone. I too had to work on my socialization skills after realising that there's too much misunderstanding than I'd like in my life. Hope you're doing better now!~

New habit of mine as well

Man I see you every where!!!

He is trying to market his channel. You will see this jackass on Vox videos as well.

That's a great idea! I'll try that.

Neeraj Jadhav that's true

I remember when people talk passionately about what interests them.

I simply want to connect to others so I’ll be able to help everyone.

Absolutely.

She's VERY intuitive.... and she "reads" people well. It's innate to her: she does it naturally.....it is NOT just coming from theoretical learning. She has honed her "active listening skills".... BUT she also knows when (and IF) to reflect ideas back to the person. She knows which people NOT to push too hard for information or reactions.... she knows intuitively when to pull back as well as when to lean into a particularly difficult conversation. She's OPRAH!!! She's one of the best interviewers "out there".

@@blondwiththewind2598 absolutely she is my mentor

I read this one article that shared you can ask 20 questions and get someone to become attracted to you. I didn't believe it at first, but the questions were personal and deep enough to where sharing such information would make you more likely to like a person. I think Oprah did that technique, but it was televised.

Heck yeah.. she's the wealthiest woman in the US

Winny Films It makes me very uncomfortable that your profile pic's wink is on the right eye but the emoji's is on the left😂

Unova 777 hahaha lol! Damn it!! I fudged up!! 😂😂😂

She is a great actor. You should be on as the guest on the show to know how grest of an actor oprah is.

Shawno 7 😂

no, she is crap

She probably is. I'm really comfortable with words, people and public speaking now; but when I was 15, I had a lisp and no one could understand me, it was so fustrating. When I finally got my voice back...all the words just came out, you know. She has the empathy, quiet stillness and just...thoughtful, authentic demeanor of an introvert. I do believe, with a little help and time; they can be among the most charismatic people.

@@rocketassistedgoat1079 No she is not an introvert, she is actually an extrovert ( ENFJ) to be more specific

Charisma on Command should be a college

@@PracticalExperts lmao

Extroverts should always post something on social media

Ziky 👁_👁'

Saaame 😂💀

Odds are they're doing it wrong in that case. It's not just about eye contact, it's first about letting yourself seem like a non-judgmental and open person yourself. Once you've shown that there's absolutely nothing to fear about you, listening with eye contact gets massively stronger at actually getting people comfortable talking to you.

Ziky maybe youre insecure

Ziky Sounds like they make you aware of your insecurities. That means your job is to figure out what those are, and figure out how to be more accepting of yourself.

Ha I think that is probably the default

Charisma on Command hahah thanks 😂👌

@@InvestingHustler sounds like you have a new stalker you're trying to get rid of? 😂

Hypnosis would be the key that I know the most...

Idk if this was a joke but just lol’d

Air Elegant Its literally a topic in this video :P

Her life story is actually pretty horrific when you look at what she's been through. Your right, I think personal experience is how she's developed such empathy.

True So True

Not everyone who's experienced extreme pain in the past has that skill though. It's more innate, IMO. She probably had to work on it too.

Air Elegant It's not that simple. Traumatized people (who haven't been able to work on it) are very likely to misinterpret others in "familiar situations" because their psyches are going off the rails at the hint that something bad is going to happen again. She must have worked on it a ton. Don't ever try to hint that anyone is better off experiencing something truly awful again, thanks.

Thanks!

She’s empathizing, that’s her superpower.

Well I disagree after all a good way to touch a person is to make sure the other person doesnt tense up.

It depends on who it is and how they do it. I actually noticed the HR director at the company I work for does exactly the same thing, but again, there's no awkwardness in the way she does it because of the skills she has to connect with people.

I have a friend who does that. He does it to everyone even waitresses. You can see them take a mental step back and in 3 seconds decide if he's harmless or not. On more than one occasion I've wandered off to the ladies room but really took a detour to find the waitress and let her know he is harmless. I also slip them an extra tip. I really wish he wouldn't do it, it's getting expensive for me. I'm not comfortable being touched by strangers and I can see the war going on in some of these people's heads. His wife is oblivious, my husband is pretty oblivious too. Maybe I'm just more tuned in but not everyone welcome physical contact even if it is only putting your hand over another's.

Sharon Martin maybe he's just like Chris Hemsworth.

Sharon Martin I would go so far as to say the majority of people dislike being touched by anyone they don't know on a personal level, the only reason why it's considered acceptable here is because it's in front of an audience, and the people being touched basically signed up *in order to get attention*

Awww and not pay the gift tax... Lol I remember hearing about that incident. It was the epitome of the saying 'No good deed goes unpunished' lol

@@RoxanneGutierrez010 Someone grants you a brand new car and you deem them criminals because the gift tax is not included? Forgive me for saying, but right now I just pity you...

Or BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEES

*David Dobrik*

mr beast

Nepthu ive also witnessed de clapping of de cheeks amongst guys.

Epstein says otherwise

@@compilationgems2237 Yeah I was thinking about that. O find it hard to believe but sometimes it's the people you expect least.

In the case of this video, no one else did either!

Wow awesome!

never liked a comment so fast

@Charisma on Command Awesome video bro! Thanks!

Never clicked off so fast,after I saw it was ophra

~ Best of luck. :-)

I’ll definitely practice everything you said 🙏🏾

You can look briefly at some one then look down and nod in a yes yes. Ugh huh positive way. That way you don't have to make as much eye contact.. Use the nodding positivity gestures so people feel accepted. Also showing open hands ..etc. Look that up. There are ways to make people comfortable when YOU can't make EYE contact.

Vianella.

@yerb it does help me

Same 🎃

Same here

Lol I'm curious too

Because they love Ellen , she is funny and likeable

I relate so much with what you're writing. My struggle is right now that I am feeling egoistic or narcistic when I don't give on the same level as before. But I learned when I connect so deeply with a person and the pure their heart out but it's one sided and I can't do the same, the relationship won't last, or at least at some point I loose the will to give the same again again. So the relationship is not equally shared and the other person is kind of fooled by the level of connection they think you share, but they opened up so much and you gave room for that, and in the end you don't do that same and can't go on the same level of intimacy or connection. It's so complex and I didn't understand that fully but I will hopefully. I want to have balanced formes of connection and not just me being like Oprah and not getting the credit that it may deserve... Haha don't know if it makes sense to anyone

~ Thank you, Zahra! Glad the channel is making a positive impact. :-)