Autistic And Exhausted: My Struggle With Burnout

Рет қаралды 2,455

10 күн бұрын

Dealing with Autistic burnout, getting older, and after having a mental breakdown and trying to recover... Updates on my business, KZfaq channel, and introducing my new puppy Gru.
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Пікірлер: 75

@CourtneyMermaid 5 күн бұрын

I want to thank you all for the beautiful comments you've left for me on this video! I wish I had the spoons right now to respond to each one but for now please know that I have read every comment and treasure them all. Thank you so much for your continued support and all the kindness you've shown me. 💖

@MissMaryLu 8 күн бұрын

As someone struggling to come out with their autism, a video would be tremendous. Gentleness and hugs to you. We can be burnout buddies 🥰☕️

@corisaber 8 күн бұрын

Just do you! Mermaid, autism, business and puppy it's all great. I'm new to the channel but ill throw spoons at the haters for you

@natashav3442 4 күн бұрын

Same I can’t believe anyone would treat you like that

@RebekahAmberClark 8 күн бұрын

I'm so incredibly grateful for the transparency with you talking about autism, but I see it as a privilege you're giving us and definitely not a right or anything you "owe" us in any way!

@RebekahAmberClark 8 күн бұрын

I almost forgot!! Congratulations for finishing/editing/posting the video!!

@rebeccaburnell9319 8 күн бұрын

This.

@BiddyBiddyBiddy 8 күн бұрын

CONGRATS on finishing and posting the video.

@turntablez504 8 күн бұрын

You may be a snivelling mess, but so are many of us. We relate to you and support you ❤ You dont have to have your life "together" to inspire or to be helpful, just showing your reality is enough. It lets the rest of us snivelling heaps know we're not alone. Wishing you all the best!

@ninaandianfan21 4 күн бұрын

💯- couldn’t have said it better!

@migomez719 8 күн бұрын

You do you Courtney. I do miss your mermaid tail maker and mermaid persona content on KZfaq. But it makes sense that you need to protect your business and art so enter the patreon pod. But please know that while I can’t support you on patreon now, maybe in the future, you have inspired a lot of us to do our own thing and be creative!

@paulinejulien9191 8 күн бұрын

Please make as many videos as you want 😊 I’m in major post-diagnosis autistic burnout & got so excited when I saw you’d posted a new video ❤

@-shenanigans. 8 күн бұрын

It sounds like we're on parallel (horribly difficult) timelines. I had a mental breakdown at the end of April. I'm not working anymore. I, for one, will gladly listen to these videos all the way through. It makes me feel less alone.

@Camrin16 8 күн бұрын

23:29 Courtney, I don’t know about everyone else here but you could record yourself talking for hours or swimming in a new tail or even doing everyday things like walking your dog or driving and I will still come back and watch. I started following you because I like you as a person you doing the mermaid stuff was just an added bonus. So in conclusion, post what ever you want and I will always come back and watch.

@dothebunnyhop4026 8 күн бұрын

Somehow you found a wonderful stress aware dog and I'm amazed!

@chrisavery3289 8 күн бұрын

Thank you for the updates on your life. The insight from the point of view from an Autistic Artist is both invaluable and informative. I have unrelated questions (stream of thought, sorry), but thank you for A: being you, and B: letting us know what goes on in your world

@KaitouHotaru 8 күн бұрын

Congrats on the completion of this video! In a burn-out state of mind, especially, that is really impressive and you should be proud!❤

@dragonflyfragment 8 күн бұрын

I love these kinds of videos. It makes me feel like I’m not alone in this. Thank you for sharing, I’m happy every time you pop up on my feed with any type of content! ❤

@janeb2958 7 күн бұрын

_I_ like the talking head videos because I'm on a similar journey. it's very lonely but youtube videos are being incredibly helpful - in givng me permission to honour my reality, in helping me believe I deserve to think about my needs. In confirming and echoing back that my experiences are valid... Thank you for sharing.

@WaveWolf23 8 күн бұрын

Glad to see you back. You are stronger than you know and the haters can go away. Just be yourself. Gru is totally cute.

@Shawteeezy 7 күн бұрын

I would like a video about how people reacted to your "autism coming out" video. I myself had mostly positive feedback, when I told people that I'm autistic. To be fair it was only in a private environment unlike you who did it publicly. Also I'm happy that you were able to finish and upload this video even though you didn't have much energy for it. Thank you for all your effort.

@beckyredenbeaux 8 күн бұрын

I’ve been watching you for like 5 years and continue to enjoy watching all your episodes. In away i feel my life has been very similar and just having another person that enjoys the same things as well as going through similar situations at the same age has been inspiring! Just know you’re not alone either and the ones that truly care will always be there to help support you as you do for others in your videos. You are Amazing ❤

@vixxxei 8 күн бұрын

I don't usually come to say anything in the comments, but I like to keep up with you and I'm silently rooting for you and your health. I'm personally struggling with a lot of health issues myself right now and I'm so scared because of it. I don't feel so alone with updates like this. Although the health issues are wildly different, I can empathize with you about how people can react to health concerns. Thank you for being you and just being yourself. ❤

@emmajwilkins 8 күн бұрын

This might be a very naive comment, but my thought immediately when you were asking what your audience wants or who they are etc, is that it really should be based on you. Whoever is meant for you will stay, and whoever isn't won't be missed. The channel is yours, not ours, so maybe I'd shift it and ask what you want to make? Because you're right - some element of it has to be fun for you. And if nothing would be fun and you don't want to do it any more, if the answer to 'what do you want to make' is something outside of KZfaq, then that's absolutely fine too. You aren't tied to the choices you made years ago.

@Princesslov27 8 күн бұрын

I appreciate you being honest and being yourself. You inspire me to be mer but also I love to see you as you. You’ve become a comfort KZfaqr for me regardless of if there’s not mer content. Because I feel connected with you. *sending lots of love and care*

@kellydoherty2192 8 күн бұрын

I noticed your glasses they are cute. I am glad you're taking time. I am glad you share your story.

@avionpiscean33 8 күн бұрын

I'm glad to see your content. Been watching for a few years, just before your diagnosis, as a mermaid and as an autistic person. I'd love to give a warm welcome to the new puppy. And congrats on getting this out. It was great listening to you while working on my very sparkly mermaid blanket.

@FemDeku1969 8 күн бұрын

I have ADHD and Adult Autism and I am 55 I take one day at a time IM also lucky to have such a great husband that helps me when i need it

@LaviniaAddle 8 күн бұрын

First of all, I wish you a full and fast recovery! As to the question what we want: personally I found you because of the autism videos and love that. But I generally like listening to you, so I‘ll probably continue watching your content anyway 😊 Know that you’re appreciated as who you are not just who you have been or what you have showed.

@suzannetunnicliffe2422 8 күн бұрын

He is absolutely adorable

@MermaidTaurva 6 күн бұрын

Of course I watched the whole thing! Keep speaking your truth! Never apologise xx

@lbr888 8 күн бұрын

Keep looking after yourself! Life can be really tough in so many ways! You are doing fantastic!

@danaj. 8 күн бұрын

Glad you to see you again! I wish you all the best in the world. :)

@mermaidenjane2393 7 күн бұрын

Just be yourself, whatever that looks like ❤️ social media has become so disingenuous and superficial, but it doesn't have to be. With the world on fire, lots of us are struggling to keep swimming & honesty makes people feel less alone. That being said, I also totally respect your privacy and potentially not being comfortable putting intimate aspects of your true self on display.

@fionabonto 8 күн бұрын

i personally don't mind both mermaid and autism content because im interested in both. But if some reason u want your channel to be curated to mermaid content, u could make a separate channel about autism content :) OR maybe update the name of your channel to fit both

@suzannetunnicliffe2422 8 күн бұрын

I appreciate what you do and all of your videos. You do what you need to do. I'll be here. I'm just on my first journey by seeing my GP.

@maybreathingstone 6 күн бұрын

I've only watched one minute of this and I can already tell you're a super hero, mate

@onyx_the_water_dragon3889 8 күн бұрын

I love all you videos, your content always is nice to listen to and every time a new video of yours appears on my screen, I always click on it to know more about autism and sewing mermaid tails. Just saying that, whatever you choose to do, I’ll follow you because you are a great KZfaqr. Sending lots of love from the other side of Canada! 🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵(Btw, Gru is so adorable! I’m so happy for you that he helps you)

@seaopalthemeren 8 күн бұрын

15:22 GRU IS SO CUTE!!!! Alfie would have gotten along with him so well!

@hollyann988 2 күн бұрын

I've sat here and watched because I'm in the same situation with finding myself after a late diagnosis. I'm a 45 yr old female and so much of what you have said is very relatable to me. I found you through your autism assessment video and have since watched some of your mermaid content but I'm more interested in hearing about how you are navigating and your attempts at finding balance since your diagnosis. Its so overwhelming, and hearing about how someone is going through it just makes me less anxious and depressed about it. I feel like theres such a limited amount of info out there and its sometimes very lonely feeling figuring out where life goes from here.

@m1k4d0 7 күн бұрын

Congrats on completing the long work of putting a video out in the world that is not feeling like beeing a place to put out anything right now while autistic burnout. You help so much even if you are not feel like that. ❤

@stuffingtonjfluffypantsiii 8 күн бұрын

Love the new glasses. Gru is adorable. Glad to see you back.

@johannabjorkell4226 4 күн бұрын

Commenting for the algoritm, watched all the ads to the end, my small support of what you do ❤

@cowsonzambonis6 8 күн бұрын

If you’re up for it, I would really like to know your experience being open about your diagnosis. I am self-diagnosed right now, and have shared a blog I’m writing with my close family, but no one else. Maybe I’m waiting for an official diagnosis to avoid people doubting/fighting me on it… Anyway, I hope you get to a better safer place soon! ❤

@kisban16 6 күн бұрын

I’d love to see the video of how coming out as autistic was received. Also, I don’t mind that you’re not switching seats! I’m mostly listening while I craft anyways. Thanks for sharing Grue! 🥰

@JesseMeijer 9 күн бұрын

Congrats on posting this video.

@emileeberg8212 4 күн бұрын

Omg so excited for your new puffboy baby! Another Mermaid neurodivergent powderpuff boi mama here 🖐️ they are truly the best!! ❤❤❤ My favorite breed ever. My boi is about 4 years now and the sweetest!

@brianna8691 5 күн бұрын

Anything you make ill watch because I love you no matter what ❤

@stuffingtonjfluffypantsiii 8 күн бұрын

I'll be 40 in August so I totally get the looking and feeling your age stuff.

@johaytd 7 күн бұрын

Fully watched the video and so proud of you for doing this. Keep making tails and enjoy yourself.❤

@KayleyNymph 8 күн бұрын

Congrats on the task!

@gamewrit0058 7 күн бұрын

Congrats on posting this! ❤️🌈

@maiaiversen4377 3 күн бұрын

Love to you! Do your thing, we will stay with you❤

@Minakie 3 күн бұрын

The reason why we "look up to you" is because we are a sniveling mess. Because we are too. And it's nice to see people just be themselves and admit to being a sniveling mess when the other part of the world is just pretending to have the perfect life on social media all the time. It gives everyone unrealistic standards and then we try to force ourselves to live up to these made-up standards and fail at it and get frustrated with ourselves wondering what we are doing wrong because we didn't see that the perfect life was maybe not so perfect after all. We need more genuine people on the internet and I feel like the neurodivergent people are the ones naturally fighting against this wave of deceipt.

@gamewrit0058 7 күн бұрын

14:55 Puppy Gru! 🥰🐾❤️

@jessicatalbert6646 2 күн бұрын

I'd like to hear about how things changed after you told people about your diagnosis. I'm waiting for the discussion part of my assessment, and someone close to me said "you might consider keeping it to yourself if you are autistic" and it took me by suprise. So hearing someone's experience with that would be helpful. My daughter has been diagnosed, so even if I'm not autistic, it could apply to her too. Thank you for putting yourself out there ❤ sorry to hear it's caused problems for you. It says alot about the people creating those problems in your life.

@coolprzezobciach 8 күн бұрын

Thank you ❤ « We » do need to see « that»

@jajvirta 7 күн бұрын

Hugs and forces! I struggle to find the right words[1], but let's just say that the world desperately needs more people like you. [1] An autistic thing, I guess?

@Spiffy_Space_Dragon 7 күн бұрын

Congrats on the video! I see that others have stated what I want to say, but they used better words than I could. I'll just add that I feel so appreciative that I have some of your art (the Tamara leggings/shorts/rash guard). I do not get as many opportunities to wear them as is like, but I receive quite a few compliments when I do. I love swimming in them. You are amazing.

@heylisten7266 6 күн бұрын

I thought the editing of this video was excellent! I just subscribed, so I'll be here for you when you are able to post another video! I'm definitely interested in the "coming out" video. I've been doing a lot of research recently on how different people experience and live with their autism, so I'm very interested in your life experience in general. Also any advice for newly diagnosed or self-diagnosed people. Everyone's experience is so different, so its nice to hear different perspectives even on topics already covered by other creators. For example, I personally am a 100% people-pleaser, which is probably a significant part of how I've flown under the radar for so long. Its simultaneously one of the things I love most about myself and one of the things I'm most working on improving (I struggle with codependency and related burnout). I heard you say that you were also a people pleaser, so I would be interested to hear more about that journey for you.

@thesudricmerman3318 8 күн бұрын

Congrats on making this video as myself who has autism i know the struggles 🤪

@RachaelMUA 8 күн бұрын

We love you Courtney! You are a total badass

@hydrophobicbathtowel6816 4 күн бұрын

Hey. Great job on doin the thing you wanted. You did the thing. You da bomb!

@gamewrit0058 7 күн бұрын

22:35 I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia and ADHD first, and I'm on an EDS assessment waiting list. Treating my ADHD made my Autistic side easier to accommodate. Plus, for fibromyalgia pain and Autistic overwhelm, I've found fascial counterstain therapy excellent for general desensitization and treating fresh injuries and flare ups. My U.S. insurance covered it as fibro therapy for about two years.

@erinc5883 8 күн бұрын

This happened to me when I got new glasses. My left eye is significantly worse than my right eye and they put two left lenses in my glasses and I was seeing double!!

@gamewrit0058 7 күн бұрын

4:00 You're interesting and awesome enough that you don't need to switch seats and camera effects! There's another channel I tried to watch, but they changed camera angles every 10 to 20 seconds. It was so jarring that I felt like running away, even though I was in my own home watching. 😆

@Lady_Tism 2 күн бұрын

I'm sorry you've been going thru a rough time. I've missed you tho. 😭

@megaminova 20 сағат бұрын

I enjoy everything you post, as so many other have said, do you. I will be here for it. I am a little curious what the negative ramifications have been for your openness. I feel like why would anyone be negative about it.

@bhorsesgirl1 8 күн бұрын

Hi fishy I am don't comment much but wanted to take a moment to just say hello!

@edwin8808 8 күн бұрын

Hey Courtney! You are a beautiful mermaid! You should hang out the tail when u are 90 or older!

@natashav3442 4 күн бұрын

I like seeing these kinds of videos because your in them it’s about you is what I enjoy the most no Mather what you make things fun and educational I feel like if you ever want to mermaid and think of something to film if not then don’t that’s fine to you have so much out there now your still you but I feel your less desire to swim I always did things for me never had a interest to share my mermaid swims mainly because they are also not allowed to film in the pools it’s to much stress to try and entertain others I encourage you to get out for you more when you can it’s been helping me from feeling like this less desirable I feel like I was focusing on got to swim so I can post and not swim to enjoy it

@ninaandianfan21 5 күн бұрын

If you feel comfortable or like it’s doable I would very much like a reality check video on “coming out as autistic” ❤. I (f,30) figured out that I’m autistic (+ adhd diag. at age 11) last year and got officially diag. in january. So please whatever you feel like sharing I am hear for it but please know that you do not have to!

@johannabjorkell4226 4 күн бұрын

I also wanted to add that there are PA assistants who can do your social media accts for you, also read, like and comment comments. Team Courtney Mermaid if you wish, in the same vain as your husband talked about hiring in mermaid models 🎁😍