Conquer Your Critical Inner Voice

Рет қаралды 25,413

Күн бұрын

(And How To Heal). Perhaps it is better to think about healing your critical inner voice, rather than conquering it. Our inner critic develops from early experience. This video discusses how to identify the negative core beliefs under the inner critic and how to understand yourself in order to heal.
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This video was created by Barbara Heffernan, LCSW for educational purposes only. These videos are not diagnostic and provide no individual consultation. Consumption of these materials is for your own education and any medical, psychological, or professional care decisions should be made between you and your primary care doctor or another provider that you are engaged with. Barbara Heffernan is not available for individual consultation via KZfaq, social media, or email, and provides services only in the manner mentioned above.

Пікірлер: 101

@BarbaraHeffernan 3 жыл бұрын

How do you feel about HEALING your inner critical voice, instead of conquering it?

@leofunks31 3 жыл бұрын

I feel that this is something I wish I'd started working on much sooner. But I think that when I am healed it will give me an unbelievable sense of inner peace. Thank you Barabara. :)

@christine6059 3 жыл бұрын

I think it’s a supremely kind approach, one I wish I had heard of long ago. But at age 72, I tend tend to think it’s far too late. I am exhausted after decades of pummeling myself and have no more energy.

@andrewcharbonneau4486 3 жыл бұрын

How would you go about healing an inner critical voice that has a lifetime's worth of subject matter to go on because my face is disfigured since birth...

@monicasanchez8438 3 жыл бұрын

this hits home so much!!!!!. thank you!!!i can only wish you more success and power.

@BeatzByMK 2 жыл бұрын

That feels a lot better

@bossiestplebita0528 3 жыл бұрын

I had horrible anxiety and depression as a kid. I would push people away because I didn't feel like socializing because I felt horrible. I grew up in a very hostile environment as a kid and my mom was really verbally abusive. I pushed people away because I wasn't being myself...my head was full of negative self talk. I couldn't be my fun funny self and i thought I'd bore them. I had anxiety, and then I developed social anxiety because I thought I was boring because I was so depressed and didn't want to socialize. I couldn't be myself...it became a vicious cycle...I didn't have support at home and I was scared to open up to anyone. Geeeesh louise. This too shall pass. I am loveable. I was just so hurt and I shut down. I will beat this. 😊

@sun018 2 жыл бұрын

Brave and courageous person, well done on your awareness and self observations. You've come this far, this will definitely help you further.

@fredharvey2720 2 жыл бұрын

I'm sorry you went through that

@asasinambiar6860 2 жыл бұрын

@@fredharvey2720 i too had bad expeeriences as a child. I am 64 and i recovered from trauma couple of years ago only...... I lost major part of my life.... due to my parents... 😘

@fredharvey2720 2 жыл бұрын

@@asasinambiar6860 I'm sorry

@jonwebb6644 3 жыл бұрын

I have discovered that by doing the action, even if don't believe it's going to work is going to produce good results eventually. Drag the body and the mind will follow.

@BarbaraHeffernan 3 жыл бұрын

Yes!

@Ra-thesunking Жыл бұрын

This is my first impression, thank you so much for your comment.

@grannyvroomvroom2523 3 жыл бұрын

Your approach to healing is wonderful, for those of us with a lot of negative self talk are best served by learning compassion and love for ourselves because the source of our negativity likely came from a "lack of" compassion or love from others who were important in our lives. Thank you!

@BarbaraHeffernan 3 жыл бұрын

Yes!

@sreenivasg7827 3 жыл бұрын

Very true, self talk is very important to reconcile one self. It's a continuous process to adopt..Thanks Barbara

@BarbaraHeffernan 3 жыл бұрын

It really is!

@laurayates4033 3 жыл бұрын

YOU are a blessing. The only way out is IN. I love this and am so grateful to have you as a resource!

@BarbaraHeffernan 3 жыл бұрын

Wow, thank you for letting me know :)

@phaniraj5142 11 ай бұрын

Great talk and explanation of concept Mam, almost on similar lines, the talk by sister BK Shivani of Brahma Kumaris...

@junea.sierra6691 2 ай бұрын

Thank you so much for this, Ms. Hefferman. Please know that you are making so much difference in the world. ❤

@cmullenmusic 8 ай бұрын

Thank you...

@solomancambridge2572 11 ай бұрын

Omg, this is so insightful. Not to brag, but I live in a area code where the norn is us seeing Ferraris, Porches and Mercedes vehicles every hour. It doesnt impress me though. My nervous system still reacts like I still live in an War Zone, so I work from home and dont go out as much as most people. CPTSD from growing up in a violent alcoholic drug addicted childhood home, is a daily grinding experience. Some days andiety and agoraphobia is lower than usual. To my credit, I managed go to two festivals withing the last month. Yay!😊

@dmnb.3691 Жыл бұрын

I'm very grateful for your videos on your KZfaq channel ❤ Outstanding ❤❤❤ Thanks!!

@BarbaraHeffernan Жыл бұрын

So glad they are helpful! Thank you for letting me know!

@dmnb.3691 Жыл бұрын

@@BarbaraHeffernan I would like more information on EMDR Therapy how you can help yourself. And Barbara do you provide consultation?

@heathergill8622 2 жыл бұрын

Thank you for making videos to help us understand what's going on and how to begin to think about and respond in these situations! You pack so much info into all of your videos, but it works together so smoothly. From this one, I know I can start to show some TLC to my Inner Critic instead of feeling bad about what it's telling me!

@BarbaraHeffernan 2 жыл бұрын

Awesome!!

@gonziespinoza8790 3 жыл бұрын

I cannot stop crying listening to this....Thank you...it is intense...Thank you

@BarbaraHeffernan 3 жыл бұрын

I SO hope it is helpful. Wishing you health and healing, Barbara

@lthomas3623 3 жыл бұрын

Thanks for everything you are putting out

@joed.5748 Жыл бұрын

Barbara, you are freaking me out. I just got done watching your enmeshment video. My name is Joe and I am a goofy kid who felt exiled in middle school, currently trying to be a good Uncle Joe to a very enmeshed nephew and niece... *goosebumps*

@BarbaraHeffernan Жыл бұрын

🤣 how lucky your niece and nephew are too have you!

@grahamfonteyne4792 3 жыл бұрын

Thanks for the excellent video Barbara. You are so insightful!

@BarbaraHeffernan 3 жыл бұрын

You are so welcome!

@mosesmukuna 3 жыл бұрын

Excellent insights, very helpful indeed. Your information has brought me far.

@BarbaraHeffernan 3 жыл бұрын

Great to hear!

@marymullins4130 3 жыл бұрын

Thanks Barbara - always so helpful.

@BarbaraHeffernan 3 жыл бұрын

So glad it is helpful for you!

@sarveshkore5468 9 ай бұрын

Thank you 🙏🙏

@eamonmcullen 2 жыл бұрын

Thank you Barbara. Watching this was profound for me!

@BarbaraHeffernan 2 жыл бұрын

Wonderful! I'm so glad it was helpful!

@flerma223 2 жыл бұрын

I'm so glad I discovered your channel

@BarbaraHeffernan 2 жыл бұрын

Awesome! Terrific that you are accessing resources and bringing them to your therapist in an active way!!

@loahyvalley9797 3 жыл бұрын

Another great video. Very inspiring. I will use it for my EMDR work. Thank you so much❣️

@BarbaraHeffernan 3 жыл бұрын

Terrific! You are welcome and thank you for doing this work as well!

@barbaraholldk2173 2 жыл бұрын

you are wonderful!! SO helpful!!

@BarbaraHeffernan 2 жыл бұрын

Thank you so much for letting me know - it is very helpful for me to know my videos help. Wishing you health and healing, Barbara

@raffaelebenvenuti9913 3 жыл бұрын

It’s great and always interesting to listen to your talks. I take notes all the times 👍🏻☀️🎏💚

@BarbaraHeffernan 3 жыл бұрын

Wonderful! Thanks for letting me know!

@Ra-thesunking Жыл бұрын

This seems very helpful, thank you

@BarbaraHeffernan Жыл бұрын

You are welcome! I hope it helps!

@raniadizikiriki8935 Жыл бұрын

I am so happy I found your channel!Sending warm greetings from Greece.

@BarbaraHeffernan Жыл бұрын

Welcome!! Glad you are here. I've loved my visits to your beautiful country.

@user-xf2ww9pm8p Жыл бұрын

You helped me a lot thank you

@BarbaraHeffernan Жыл бұрын

Glad I could help!

@anandalawrence6203 2 жыл бұрын

Wow!! I've watched two of your videos and I have learnt so much already😲. Thankyou

@BarbaraHeffernan 2 жыл бұрын

I'm so glad! Thanks for letting me know!

@jeffd.5110 3 жыл бұрын

Barbara, you are unbelievable! As if you were in my head these past years. It is something of a comfort apparently I am not alone in my thoughts. We must have dated in a prior life or parallel universe. lol, Time for a retreat if it were possible.

@user-td9mf8nw2x 3 жыл бұрын

maam you are such an angle who saves us.thankyou so much

@BarbaraHeffernan 3 жыл бұрын

Thank you for your sweet comment!

@mariamkinen8036 2 жыл бұрын

I consider my inner voice to be just n righteous . Very pragmatic.

@lorelieglasgow5147 Жыл бұрын

I came across you looking for help to see if I want to go down the emdr path. You have been a big help in many areas. I appreciate you.

@BarbaraHeffernan Жыл бұрын

Thank you so much for letting me know! I hope the material continues to be helpful for you!

@jantoledo6533 3 жыл бұрын

Very helpful👏👏👏👏 Thank you!

@BarbaraHeffernan 3 жыл бұрын

So glad it was helpful!

@John-qt3vt 3 жыл бұрын

Finding a lot of value in these videos.

@BarbaraHeffernan 3 жыл бұрын

I'm so pleased to hear that. Thank you for letting me know!

@anupa1090 3 жыл бұрын

Nice madam really soothing and energetic

@BarbaraHeffernan 3 жыл бұрын

So nice of you!

@petehill8885 Жыл бұрын

Your work is vitally important Barbara.🤩🔥

@BarbaraHeffernan Жыл бұрын

Thank you so much, Pete!

@amyj.4992 Жыл бұрын

My therapist taught me, when your negative critic starts to talk bad to you. Talk to your critic, by reframing its own narrative. Self compassion helps a lot. Learning to laugh at yourself, she would call it. Setting emotional boundaries, on your A.N.T.S. (automatic negative thoughts) setting boundaries allows you, to be mindful of your own emotional expressions without being blatantly disrespectful towards others. But if I am ever disrespectful...Mama Domma comin' for that jugular

@sohailkhan1651 Жыл бұрын

absolutely correct

@BarbaraHeffernan Жыл бұрын

👍🤗

@nakanjakofaith9532 Жыл бұрын

Hey Barbara

@BarbaraHeffernan Жыл бұрын

😀

@KathrynAnnWilliams 3 жыл бұрын

Great perspective and explanations. I really wanted to read the pdf but it wouldn't download by clicking on download button.

@BarbaraHeffernan 3 жыл бұрын

Hi Kathryn: Please check your download file. It goes right into there sometimes. Hope that helps!

@laizaglutz8362 3 жыл бұрын

Could you please help clarify: How could someone who received a lot of love in their childhood be so needy of receiving love as an adult? And how could you be so fearful of betrayal when you never experienced parental divorce, parents leaving, loss of a parent etc.?

@esfromec1 Жыл бұрын

Thank you Barbara, I sure hope I get to have some sessions with you in the future. Are you taking new clients by the way?

@BarbaraHeffernan Жыл бұрын

Hi: I take on only a very limited number of 1:1 coaching clients, Info here:www.awakenjoy.life/1-on-1-coaching, and logistics of working with me here:www.awakenjoy.life/contact

@burntoats Жыл бұрын

Dear Barbara, thank you so much. I'm finding your videos so encouraging! Your tone and style and suggestions are very nourishing and non-judgemental. I have a question: after my last very painful breakup I realised I can easily interpret my life/relationships/choices through the lens of CPTSD. I've had a long list of family severely traumatic events that makes it impossible to ignore. I started reading books about complex trauma, and came across Pete Walker's core idea of 'angering' against the inner critic/inner parental figure in a sustained way for quite a long time. He states that it is the initial fundamental phase of recovery from CPTSD. I have tried and tried, but I find it incredibly tough/fake and it also feels like attacking a part of myself. What do you think of this strategy? Thank you :)

@BarbaraHeffernan Жыл бұрын

Hi: So glad you are finding my videos encouraging! I am not familiar with Pete Walker. Most of the paradigms I have learned and utilized for myself and my clients have been the opposite - embracing the inner critic, who arose to protect us... even if it takes a destructive approach - ... I also think different approaches can work for different people so I encourage you to trust your intuition and find something that works for you!

@burntoats Жыл бұрын

@@BarbaraHeffernan Thank you so much Barbara :)

@marilynmoney2771 2 жыл бұрын

Hello Barbara,I'm new OMG joy...I'm so far from Joy I honestly cannot remember Well now that I'm typing on my Phone . Actually, if I had to Guess i think I felt some Joy when I was a Buddhist as well, though I'm thinking perhaps not The same sect as you ( I'm just guessing) I used to chant Morning & evening This is many years of ago It's getting difficult to type My right hand/arm is in a sling.

@BarbaraHeffernan 2 жыл бұрын

Hi Marilyn: How wonderful that you have experiences in your past that led you to more joy - that is such a rich field to pull from to figure out what to do next!

@mirelladlima5278 2 жыл бұрын

Could positive affirmations and reprogramming the subconscious mind meditations help to convert our negative self talk to positive ?🙏

@BarbaraHeffernan 2 жыл бұрын

I think those things help. In my experience, working with "reasonable" positive beliefs is more effective long term than affirmations, but there are many different methods!

@thanksexportsshoes240 2 жыл бұрын

hi barbara you have deep knoledege it is all that happening to me

@BarbaraHeffernan 2 жыл бұрын

So sorry to hear you experience this, but I hope the video is helpful!

@mariamkinen8036 2 жыл бұрын

I fear . Life with DANGEROUS ppl ,rather, requires a louder inner voice

@nakanjakofaith9532 Жыл бұрын

Y do i suffer with concentration

@BarbaraHeffernan Жыл бұрын

I couldn't say! there are a number of things that make it hard to concentrate... anxiety, adhd, medical... might be worth discussing with a doctor or therapist. Wishing you the best!