Get a full month of MUBI FOR FREE: mubi.com/thetake (With the support of Creative Europe - MEDIA Programme of the European Union) Support The Take on Patreon: www.patreon.com/thetake Subscribe to keep up with our latest videos, and let us know what you want to see next!

I’d rather be rich and unhappy than poor and unhappy.

That awkward moment when you're nothing like Helen and still have no friends.

This reminds me of one of my best friends I met in college. She was so beautiful and popular with a super jock bf. And I hated her instantly; then one night my boyfriend cheated on me, she saw me crying, and told me her bf did too and she gave me some advice. We sat on my bed talking about boys and I slowly started to realize that this stunning girl was also incredibly kind and far more genuine than I assumed - she also revealed that she felt utterly lonely despite having so many friends. Ten years, several boyfriends, a happy marriage and two kids later, we are still besties. Learned from that experience to not judge based solely on looks. You should also do the kids of Haunting of Hill House.

I feel like they’re both in the wrong though. Helen’s projection of perfection is detrimental because it sacrifices authenticity. But at the same time, Annie shouldn’t project her own insecurities on other women through jealousy.

I like how this channel looks at certain pieces of media that others may consider "too mainstream" or even "for girls" and look at it in a way that is more inclusive and/or critical without being mean.

The reason so many men pretend not to like this movie is because the two women (for once) aren't fighting over some douchebag guy. It was refreshing, and the movie is genuinely hilarious as well.

I love how Helen is shown to be much more complex than she initially appears. As the movie is mostly told from Annie's perspective, we are allowed to hate Helen along with Annie, until it's revealed that she is merely overcompensating for having no real female friends. Helen's true nature is hinted at when we see how horribly her stepchildren treat her. Rose Byrne plays her so perfectly!😍

"I am not paying for this shit" Lillian's dad is the most relatable person ever.

Helen believes that in order to be loved she has to appear perfect. The irony is, her efforts to be this way are precisely what makes her unlikable to others. It's a nice contradiction.

Why did Lillian like Helen in the first place, when Helen is objectively unlikable? Helen openly and indiscreetly bullies Annie and Lillian allows it and doesn't stick up for Annie. She knows Annie is struggling financially and shows no consideration when Helen forces everyone to buy exorbitant designer gowns and first class retreats. If you ask me, Lillian also behaved in an extremely self-absorbed, disloyal, and insensitive manner and tacitly enables and supports Helen's bullying . I don't think Lillian behaved in a way that made her affection worth fighting for; she's a bad friend. She either is a social climber who has throws her best friend under the bus for someone more glamorous or she has no bullshit detector at all.

I never understood why the giant cookie and chocolate fountain were outside LOL

Really? I actually like Helen as character. She has so many dimensions and she is complex. I think all of us have a bit of Helen in ourselves. We all want to be loved without being vulnerable in front of others, making it harder for us to display our true emotions. We develop alter egos/facade because we want to fit in which may comes out as insincere and fake. I can empathize with Helen.

You can explain Annie's behaviour, you can explain Helen's. But how will anyone be able to explain Lilian's behaviour? I thought Lilian was the worst. She is unwilling to understand Annie's reasons or see Annie's side and she makes excuses for Helen too. She refuses to hold Helen responsible for anything, even though Helen tries to drive a wedge between her and Annie. She passively lets Helen get away with all her cruel, mean schemes. I've known people like Lilian in real life. They say this world is an illusion and even the closest and the most tight-knitted relationships are subject to change and alteration through envy, resentment, betrayal, vengeance, bitterness, etc. I love that this movie exposes how you can't even trust your best friend. Lilian knows Annie more than anybody else, she's known her since childhood and yet she dismisses Annie when Annie is going through a tough phase. She's passive and silently watches Helen instigating Annie, yet she says nothing to Helen. Lilian uses Helen, who is wealthy, to move up the ladder because she herself is about to marry Douglas who is wealthy and upperclass. And when she realises that her father can't afford the wedding, she feels she's way out of her league with the wealthy class of people like Helen or even Douglas. She ends up feeling low and then she uses Annie for comfort and consolation because only Annie knows the real Lilian and she knows that only Annie can boost up her self-esteem. There are so many people like Lilian in real life. I've had the displeasure of meeting some of them. When they're in your league, they laugh with you, cry with you. They're your friends. As soon as they get to move up the ladder they dismiss you. Even Helen is not as dangerous as Lilian

I love how this can be seen in The Good Place with Tahani torturing Eleanor.

Megan- the woman I wish I was. She has confidence and a great job, and is secure in who she is as a person. I love her and her witty comebacks. "Climb him like a tree" "it's coming out of me like hot lava" etc. 😂😂😂

"this is my husband. You don't have a husband." LMAO 🤣😂🤣😂 the way she delivered that line all while smiling is absolutely brilliant

Annie wasn’t jealous of Helen for having a better life than her, she was rightfully threatened because Helen was trying to box her out as maid-of-honor and intruding on moments usually reserved for the bride and her best friend. If anything, I was annoyed that Lilian couldn’t see through what Helen was doing and how it was making Annie feel. “Best” friends are generally in tune with each other’s feelings. I’ve been the Helen (which sucks a lot harder than you’d expect) and the Annie, but never the Lilian.

I always felt like I could sense Helen’s desperation for female friends, just that she doesn’t know how to go about it. I feel like I’ve met less dramatic versions of Helens as an adult and it’s just that women grown up learning to see each other as competition and that the only way to survive is to be “the best.” I always just try to be like no! We can all be the best! Haha ☺️

I don't think we are ever supposed to hate Helen, though, just find her ridiculous. Helen isn't a villain or antagonist; she's really more like a foil. Annie's real conflict is with herself. Also, Rose Byrne is a criminally underrated actress.

Now you have to do a deep dive on why Megan is the best friend that we all deserve. She’s iconic, stole the show. Played beautifully by Melissa McCarthy

"I want people to be afraid of how much they love me." -Michael Scott

Helen is very relatable. Helen is what happens when you're told by your teachers as a child that you're not good enough, told to stop being a cry baby by your parents and when you didn't have many friends in childhood. We think nobody will like us for who we really are. So we try to overcompensate by favours and perfectionism. We isolate because we think vunerability is weakness, imperfections are weakness... that we can't trust others with our emotions because they will use it against us. I'm trying to break that pattern though it's really hard.

Not a fan of romcoms in general but Bridesmaids is iconic, smart, and wholesome and is my go-to movie when I'm sad

i just love channels like this and julia cudney, that do well thought out film analysis and dont look down on "chick-flicks"

If y'all are analyzing movies about female friendships, could you analyze Jennifer's Body? It's 10 years old this year and criminally underrated. Anyway, another great video as always! 😊

Funny how much money rich people spend to tell us that rich people are not happy.

Helen was overcompensating with her perfection and Annie was overcompensating with inner whining.. both were pretty Ott honestly. Didn't hate anyone, couldn't hate anyone, we all have shades of both of these women inside us.

"Oh you live in Milwaukee? Oh, I'm sorry!" Is still my favorite line in the entire film

Oh dear...I think I'm a diluted poor version of Helen.

One detail is how Helen pronounces "Parisian" as "pair-uh-see-un." It suggests that Helen probably didn't come from money herself, but only married into it because of her looks. After all, the scene with the stepkids strongly suggests she's a trophy wife who her husband acquired after trading in his first wife for a "younger model."

Rose Byrne is a genius! She should've been nominated for Best Supporting Actress like Melissa.

Unpopular thing to say- Watching this made me finally realize I’m a “Helen”. I’m not consciously trying to belittle or undermine others’ success though. The overcompensation, and need to “do the most” for others is a habit I’ve cultivated since childhood. It stems from a deep desire to connect with others, and a lack of understanding as to how to make that actual connection. What a great video, it really helped me self reflect. I’ve never even seen this movie lol

Why Helen has no friends: 1. Be fake friendly 2. Make people feel bad about themselves 3. Be possessive 4. Buy your friends 5. Move to fast 6. Do too much 7. Perform your friendship (put it on display)

I think about this every time I see friends posting their friendship (or love) declarations on social media, who is it really for? I see it as a way to show the public: "look, I am beloved, I have friends and our bond is strong".

we should learn to admire someone's beauty without questioning our own

So, in the end both women have self-esteem issues. One overcompensates because of her perfectionism and cannot be authentic or genuine, which makes her play herself because she can't form a real bond with a friend. The other compares herself and blames others for making her feel bad about herself and her life choices, instead of taking responsibility for her life and her self-esteem/self-perception. We're all a little fucked up, and while we shouldn't justify shitty behaviours, we can all judge each other a little less, so that we can improve and have better relationships.

Michael Scott would argue that it is better to be both feared and loved. They will fear how much they love you.

"her culture's ultimate feminine success, marriage". There is so much to talk bout this sentence

Please please could you do a analysis of Death Becomes Her. Perhaps looking at the desperation of beauty and youthfulness, especially as its something the actresses Meryl Streep & Isabella Rossellini have struggled with in the film industry!! Its a underrated film that I would LOVE to you a analysis of. Also maybe the campy style of acting and why that style of film is rare to see when it works a lot better often then a comedy with ordinary acting.

Damn, I've always thought I was more parallel with Annie because of her self criticism and self pity, but still felt for Helen - after she revealed how lonely and unhappy she was. However, I still blamed that on the fact that she was consciously fake. Now I've realized I'm more like Helen. I'm not glamourous or rich, nor do I feel like I have my shit together, but damn if I don't act like I do. I'm snobby, pretentious, and bluntly judgemental, all as an act to make myself look like I'm bigger than I really am, and I can admit that, but even in spite of me openly expressing how lost and unhappy I am to others, I still get the same reaction helen does from Annie - "Whatever. I don't feel sorry for you." And I never understood why I can't find people who care or understand that, but I'm realizing now that the reason is because I continue to put up walls making myself look neat and in tact, and people believe me. I look down at others because I'm angry and project my disapointment with myself on to the people around me, leaving them unsympathetic. So yeah, I needed this video. Thank you for this!

There was this girl in college, which I met at my first day there. She literal throw herself at me (it rained and she grabbed my arm), telling me her whole lifestory and seemed so fake with every sentence, that it immediately pushed me away from her. Later I found out that every other student felt the same about her and sonehow I felt sorry for her. She just wanted to make friends, but she was just too much for everyone.

I'd love to see a movie about Helen's childhood and school years. I mean her parents obviously trained her to feel she is only admirable, fitting and overall worthy is she is flawless and perfect. she just don't know how to be anything else or she feels belittled to the minimal. She is actually the most complex and interesting characout of the whole movie.

"Envy leads to *resentment* not love"- *takes notes This was great. And the fun thing about the "Helen of Troy" reference is that Rose Byrne was also in Troy!

This reminded me how in-depth and entertaining Bridesmaids is! I didn't even realise who Annie and Helen's names allude to. This analysis of the deeper meaning of the movie is truly insightful and an excellent exploration of friendship dynamics. Thank you for making such awesome videos!

Who else thinks it was unfair that both Cady from Mean Girls and Annie from Bridesmaids had to take all the blame and be the bigger person?

I had never realized how well-written the dialogue in this film was. Honestly the takes by The Take are a great way to find out why some pop culture fixes we thought had been shallow successes, like Bridesmaids and Mean Girls, have a whole lot going on under the surface that explains why they became so relevant.

12:25 "sometimes things that are expensive.... are worse"

How NOT to be friends 1. Be fake-friendly while jabbing 2. Make ppl feel less than you 3. Be possessive over one friend instead of trying to make more 4. Buy friends to make them want you around instead of caring about them 5. Move too fast instead of allowing bond to grow over time 6. Doing too much for others to draw the attention to you 7. Perform a friendship to impress others 8. Not being yourself, putting up walls, not being vulnerable Envy leads to resentment not love

as someone who once used to be a helen, the desire to maintain a perfect image definitely stems from insecurity-from being unable to be vulnerable because you think others won't like your true self. as i talked to more people, i noticed that the fake persona i took up was only perfect in my eyes. somehow, people were able to point out little things about me that i thought were hidden well, such as my proneness to embarrassment and sensitivity to criticism. flaws that i thought my kind words and politeness hid weren't hidden at all. everyone saw through it. at that time, however, it provided a sense of stability for me when my own self-image was unstable. i thought that everyone only saw the outer performance, and i thought everyone preferred it more than the inner performance i actually haven't watched bridesmaids but now i will. this was a great analysis video!

"The love of a friend is truly a prize worth having, it makes everything else in life better" EXACTLY. Romance can and does fade in this day and age. Women get their emotional nourishment from other women not men.

Rose Byrne absolutely crushed this role. She's brilliant.

It’s better to be feared than loved, but Macchiavelli also says the savvy politician/aristocrat knows how to engender both, and that’s the state one should strive for.

Making the villain brunette and the hero blonde is a Bridesmaids accomplishment

Shows how talented Rose Byrne is to be able to play such a character so well.

“You hate me cause you ain’t me” - what people used to say in the 90’s.

I feel personally attacked...

I love how women want to "have it all" and then when we meet women who "have it all" we hate them....makes sense.

Helen specifically says, "I don't have any *female* friends" (in the scene when she's crying to annie in the car) and remember that (I'm pretty sure I'm remembering correctly) she knows Lilian because she was a friend of *Doug's*. Then when Helen and Annie are trying to get the cop's attention Annie's actually being polite and apologetic about it and Helen starts yelling in a really rough way that traditionally would be perceived as more, like, masculine? I feel like it was hinting that Helen isn't actually that delicate in a traditional "feminine" sense. However because we're kind seeing things from Annie's perspective more or less, Annie really sees her as kind of a very pretty, feminine standard, like how a "woman should be".. I just thought that was interesting.

I love this movie because it's very realistic, full of characters who feels real. Annie's a mess and Helen is the sad rich pretty girl we all know. Both of them did some pretty questionable things. But that's just humans. None of us is always a nice person, none of us is always a great friend.

Helen irritated my entire soul. She’s that one friend that you just wish would stop doing the most

7:49 "Somehow Helen's or Regina's transparently fake performance of niceness feels meaner than open hostility." Yes, of course because if you try to openly rebut the hostile emotion behind the facade, the person can claim innocence and turn it back on you so you look like you're the jerk or crazy or mean girl. Classic female passive-aggressiveness 101. Saying that out of experience, mostly as a teenager, but I know some middle-aged women who still do this. And like with Helen, a good way to undercut it is to try to empathize, humanize.

I've often noticed how Helen's perfection was an act, often showing subtext of emptiness. Annie seem to be down on her luck because she was a victim of her own circumstance. I was often called a jerk for thinking this because the movie subverts you into thinking the enemy comes from the position the women play rather than the choices they make.

I love this movie, and to this day, the character that annoys me the most is actually Lillian LOL

I remember loathing Helen when I saw the movie the first time, but when she started crying about not having friends I was surprised how much sympathy I felt.

Can anyone relate that once your best friend has kids the friendship doesn’t feel so close anymore? I’m happy for my best friend’s growth and transition to motherhood, but I feel sad that our friendship must, understandably, take a backseat. Family, especially kids, come first. I just send her spa gifts once in awhile as a homage to our friendship. Being a woman kinda sucks because it’s the mother that has to give up most of her time to raise a child. The dad no matter how involved he is, is still second to the mother. So friendships kinda suffer after a baby, even when they grow up some mothers (not all) are just not interested in being anything else but a mom. I think that’s changing tho. A lot of the younger generation are not letting motherhood take away from their other identities such as daughter, wife, sister and friend and even their hobbies.

Helen reminds me of the housewives featured in Big Little Lies, where they pretend to have a perfect marriage and life but when you peel back the layers of defense, what you see are broken marriages, trauma, anxiety, and depression all under the veneer of an idyllic, well-healed lifestyle of Monterey.

Helen is a tragic figure. Rose Byrne is actually brilliant in the role; her inflections and little details really add up to a compelling (and repellent) performance.

Lilian is the real villain here for not seeing how toxic helen was with her best friend the whole movie. I've had this happened to me, my best friend has a friend that treats me really bad, but she's always defending her and saying that's just how she is...

Beside the money part i realized i act like a helen. This gave me self realization of what things i have been doning wrong n why i feel aliented towards people. Thank you i will try to improve myself.

Funny thing is that I wasted years of my life trying to be an Helen,i know a girl who's an Helen, is impossible to be like that but is possible to be yourself and make the most of it, I also realized women see me as an Helen which is why I don't have female friends...funny

My cousin was my Helen. She's smart, outspoken and pretty. It was only when I found out how hard she's worked to maintain her figure that I felt slightly better. I thought she was naturally thin.

To be honest I think Annie and Helen were as bad as each other. Helen really was the definition of trying too hard, when someone is like that, whether it's trying too hard to be popular, funny, intelligent, worldly etc ... it comes across as so disingenuous and forced. In life being genuine always wins. People like Helen never really have deep meaningful friendships ... they just know a lot of people. Annie is someone at some stage in life I think most of us have known. Someone who takes their insecurities and jealousies out on other people, it's almost as if you can never share good news with people like that and you have to walk on eggshells around them because you don't know how they'll react. They can never seem to be happy for others. If you have to dim other peoples light in order to shine yourself something is seriously wrong. I think Megan was the best character in Bridesmaids she was kind, wise, strong minded, assertive, didn't need validation from anyone and was unapologetically herself. Most of all she wasn't petty like the other women. Despite being bullied in the past she was totally her own person with great individuality. Annie would have been much better to have Megan as a best friend instead of Lilian who seemed so toxic and fake.

I love Rose Byrne so so so much, I love how she's able to be funny in Bridesmaids and also believable as a conniving climber who's in over her head in Damages. It's especially admirable when you see her interviews where she sounds totally down-to-earth even though she's a movie star and a world-class beauty.

This video describes perfectly why some people make me uncomfortable when I meet them and why I don't have friends (except the money part, I'm poor)

I really like the emotional focus on these video essays

Though I know the narrative of the film is not completely defined by it, I am tired of women envying each other for being prettier. It matters for the first 2-3 seconds you meet a person, and then other things take over- the way you talk, the way you dress, your body language, and your personality. Few people realise this, but after a while, your personality becomes you. After a while, people don't really remember the way you look-but how they felt talking to you, so be sure to leave them with a good feeling.

Men - horrible to their friends Women - nice to their enemies

Its not that Annie wants to be Helen. Its that Annie was asked to take on a bit of a financial burden by being a bridesmaid during a time where Lillian knew she couldnt do it and Helen rubbed her face in it. Helen made it worse by one upping Annie every single chance she got. She was fake and made jabs at her but those jabs were sugary sweet so when she blows up it makes Annie look bad. Helen creates her own misery and deserves it.

The one thing I love about your explanation overall, is that both Annie and Helen needed each other in order to grow as people. Helen needed someone to teach her how to be a good friend and Annie needed someone to take her out of the fake ideals that she thought she needed to be a desirable woman.

That one dislike was Annie 😂

Please could you do a Over The Garden Wall anaylsis. It would be perfect for October/Halloween, and it would be cool to see you dive into the themes and the brothers relationship between a optimistic and a pessimistic.

Oh fuccck. I'm a Helen. I give friends over the top gifts so I can bond with them as I never had many friends growing up so I want to.speed up the process.

Rose Byrne was seriously a revelation in this. She should’ve gotten an Oscar nomination

love how you’re looking at movies not typically considered as having enough cinematic merit. Subscribed.

Damn I’m lowkey a Helen (without the money tho)

Love love love this channel! It is so thought provoking, and encourages you to apply critical thinking to entertainment. Film can be art if well done and if we learn how to consume it.

I have never watched this movie and I really want to watch this now. I had a "friend" EXACTLY like Helen. She was overtly nice to everyone, often making grand gestures to pay for everyone's meals or like gifting expensive presents. What gave me chills was the part of the video where she was demeaning to someone who complimented her on her looks because I'VE SEEN HER DO THE SAME. Someone told her she was pretty and she replied with "Thank you! You are so sweet!" *goosebumps* Difference is that I wasn't envious of her and I think she hated that the most. "Her tactic" didn't work on me and suddenly, I became the competitor, the ENEMY. We had a "Lilian", a friend we both shared and it had begun as the 3 of us together as friends. She would invite "Lilian" alone to special posh meals, not including me at all, and then tell me things the next time we met "Oh we took the 1h train to another town JUST for breakfast. It was so good, you should go there sometime!" And I would be left there thinking: Why wasn't I invited? But here is where movie Helen differed from her. She lied to "Lilian", telling her things about me that weren't true and basically in the first year of uni, I was left with ZERO friends. And for someone who isn't an extrovert + living 16 hours away from her home country + studying in a stressful medical school, I did not do well at all. I often thought that it was my fault, wondering what I did wrong for them to distance themselves away from me like that. It is something that has affected me permanently. It is something I am still in therapy for lol. But one day, "Helen" was absent from class and "Lilian" sat next to me at lecture for the first time in months. We chatted like old times and I couldn't take it anymore. I was blunt and asked her. That was when she told me that "Helen" had told her months back that I wanted time alone with this other guy I sat in lecture with that I "supposedly" liked. Which wasn't true. Him and I had only gotten closer because he noticed I was left alone all the time and PITIED me. "Lilian" started realising a lot of other things in that one conversation and we are closer now than she is with "Helen" Just wanted to give this anecdote because Helens do exist and sure, they may all be really nice and soft inside, but you do not NEED put up with them in your life. My life was miserable and I am glad that portion is finally over. I really like this character analysis, it really helped me understand this ex-friend of mine more. I can understand her now, but I still disagree with all the poop she put me through... the end :)

There are three reasons people overspend so much on occasions - gratitude - wanting to over compensate - anxiety craving acceptance

Something tells me that Helen might have been that girl who wasn’t rich or considered pretty when she was younger so when she grew into her looks (or bought it) and married her wealth, she thought it’d be the only way to impress anyone who would be her friend if she would just be real

every women with mommy issues who haven’t dealt with their issues yet (including me) is just helen, making female friends is so gdamn hard and when i actually get one, i try to do everything for them over the top its draining actually

I never appreciated the character of Helen until i seen Rose Byrne in films like Bad Neighbours and Spy. She's such a hilarious actress and plays the role perfectly with a lot of subtlety.

I just love the actress playing Helen, you can see it her eyes the bitterness she hides under the happy face. She is quite convincing.

this type of female character is always portrayed as someone to be hated and considered superficial, but when its a guy hes a badass

Dude, Movie Idea: A movie with Helen, Regina George, and all these types of female antagonists, and have them work together on a mission impossible mission!

People hate Helen because she's pretentious, manipulative, and did her best to belittle Annie because she wanted Lil all to herself. It's no that complicated.

This movie was literally my childhood (well, 7th grade) and I used to want to be Helen so bad - so glamorous and impressive, but I also realized why and how Annie was the better friend. I'm so thrilled you made this video and I very much appreciate the in-depth analysis of a character everyone would presume to be so simplistic (the "money doesn't buy happiness" story we are well accustomed to). I also love how the movie showed all these ideas about authenticity even in your enmity for another. Thank you for this!

Half way through the video: she reminds me so much of my dad's gf lol and Helen would do great as a gossip girl character

Helen was the 2000s version of Tahani from The Good Place.

Having a true friend (s) is the hardest one imo. You have your family gifted and a system that helps you find a partner. No system guarantees you a friend apart from time. Also while watching it for the first time, I didn't despise Helen but Lillian. You can expect a perfect society woman to act like that but Lillian was Annie's best friend and couldn't even acknowledge how this was all affecting her. She never had to prove to Annie or Helen.