Building Resilience | Interviewing a Homeschool Mom about WHY Kids Don't Learn??

Рет қаралды 2,085

3 ай бұрын

Today, I'm having an interview with my mom about a topic she is very passionate about: teaching kids the skills of resilience by taking personal responsibility for one's own actions versus allowing genuine hardships to become excuses.
Find Excuses Exposed on our website here. This is a faith-based resource, with reference to passages in Genesis and Hebrews: www.wheredyoulearnthat.com/sh...
WELCOME //
I'm Rachel, a mom of 3 and the oldest in a family of 8 kids. I'm a second-generation homeschooler who is passionate about education. I'm originally from Michigan, but am living overseas. My two young boys and teaching homeschool lessons to my youngest sisters keep me busy, but I make time for writing and for making KZfaq videos, too! On this channel, you can expect videos featuring books and homeschool curriculum, homeschool tips for hard days, our journey raising bilingual kids, and vlogs about the intentional adventure that our homeschool lifestyle allows! Subscribe to join our family here:
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Expect two videos a week, uploaded at 3:45 p.m. EST on Sundays and Wednesdays.
THE CURRICULUM I WRITE//
Our family creates printable homeschool curriculum. Find those resources right here: www.wheredyoulearnthat.com
WATCH MORE //
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Classroom Management for Homeschoolers (Series) • Homeschool for REAL - ...
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Пікірлер: 84

@justifiedgold 3 ай бұрын

This is, in my opinion, the most important lesson for parents - even those who aren’t homeschooling. Building skills outside the moment for setting values and appreciating “hard” things.

@SevenInAll 3 ай бұрын

Oh yes, this is definitely not an issue specific only to homeschool--this is applicable to life and parenting in general.

@elizabethlotus4214 3 ай бұрын

This is so important for marriage as well. Being able to recognize in real time when conversation are being derailed and setting them in a "parking lot" is such a great tip in so many situation. It's not just kids that do this kind of thing. I think the culture shift has made this really common and we will find ourselves making excuses as well. Thank you for writing this resource to encourage moms, and deminish the mom guilt I see everywhere.

@SevenInAll 3 ай бұрын

You are very right, it's not just kids that do it, not at all.

@theselittlesprouts 3 ай бұрын

Gosh I just love your mom so much, she is so full of wisdom. She has so much goodness to say and I appreciate her willingness to share.

@SevenInAll 3 ай бұрын

Thanks for taking the time to watch! I also benefit much from listening to the words of someone who has walked this road, who has seen the effects of making excuses, but has also seen the effects of encouraging children that they can indeed "do normal things," that it's not overly hard or overly dramatic even if it feels hard in the moment.

@lifewithginab 3 ай бұрын

Love your mom's heart... so much wisdom. Loved the video!

@SevenInAll 3 ай бұрын

She is a gift!

@BearBettermentSchool 3 ай бұрын

On the subject of not letting a real problem become an excuse… As a person with ADHD, I love the phrase, “It’s not my fault, but it IS my responsibility.”

@SevenInAll 3 ай бұрын

That's an excellent phrase! Our children face very real problems, challenges, very real limitations....but the WAY that they face them makes all the difference. Are problems treated as reasons to give up, or as reasons to work even harder to achieve a goal?

@belindalumley1607 2 ай бұрын

My kiddos and I have been going through Excuses Exposed and it is great! My kids have enjoyed our conversations and are really examing their life for excuses.. My kids are 9 and 10. Your mama needs to make more studies like this, please 😀. Thank you both!

@SevenInAll 2 ай бұрын

If you have any specific subject areas or ideas for more similar resources to equip kids and parents--feel very free to share! We have seen the same effects of kids learning to recognize and examine their own days for the times when they are using excuses to get out of taking responsibility.

@sewingseeds. 2 ай бұрын

I really need this curriculum. I’m having a hard time even having my little boy to sit still and focus. He’s distracting my other child from learning. You are so correct when you said you can have the best curriculum in the world but one excuse can ruin it all. I appreciate all your wisdom and I look forward to learning more. Thank you!

@SevenInAll 2 ай бұрын

Yes, excuses can derail the day all too easily.

@Amenhomeschoolers 3 ай бұрын

This has been the toughest homeschool year due to my son making excuses for unfinished work or failed tests. This is so helpful. I knew I needed counsel but I didn’t know from whom so this is great!

@SevenInAll 3 ай бұрын

I'm so glad it was helpful! Learning the skill of taking personal responsibility will take our children far.

@madisonhoppermomlife5444 3 ай бұрын

I completely agree with your mama that this topic is more important than any other subject. I’m excited to try this with my teenager. Thank you to both of you!

@SevenInAll 3 ай бұрын

Yes, more important than any other subject because it will impact EVERY subject. Thank you!

@Hurryuphomeschool 3 ай бұрын

I was listening without watching the video closely and I couldn’t tell your voices apart! 😂 such good information here

@SevenInAll 3 ай бұрын

haha--years ago, me, my mom, my sister, and my mom's twin were ordering food at a restaurant. After we all made our orders, the person who took them turned to my dad and asked, "Why do they all sound the same?!" lol!

@BearBettermentSchool 3 ай бұрын

Yes, her mom says, “voila,” exactly like she does!”

@RockSimmer-gal4God 3 ай бұрын

My kids with dyslexia once we pulled them out of school they started to learn better!!! I have a kid who is struggling emotionally and she’s learning awesomely!!! Now I kno she’s struggling we can now have the conversations!!! I found out when I changed the teaching style my dyslexic kids started to learn but they wanted to learn!!! This new curriculum sounds awesome!!! I tell my kids when they don’t make sense!!!

@SevenInAll 3 ай бұрын

That's good to hear!

@andreaboyd111 3 ай бұрын

😮 what an extraordinary explanation on the power/weakness of an excuse.

@SevenInAll 3 ай бұрын

Isn't it? Such a practical way to understand both how powerful they are, and how easily they can be defeated.

@homeschoollifemom 3 ай бұрын

This is gold. I didn’t even know this was the struggle I have with one of my children but it was like a lightbulb. I just kept trying to make school easier or more fun for her. I can’t wait to go through the resource. Thank you so much! ❤

@SevenInAll 3 ай бұрын

I'm so glad that this could help fuel a lightbulb moment!

@littlebitsofbliss 3 ай бұрын

Thank you for putting this curriculum together! I’m excited to try it out!

@SevenInAll 3 ай бұрын

You are so welcome!

@audreymcnair350 3 ай бұрын

I’m so glad I watched this. I have teens (one is a senior next year) and younger ones. They all need this so much. I’m definitely going to buy your resource to help us ❤ Thank you!!

@SevenInAll 3 ай бұрын

So glad it was helpful!

@lifewithginab 3 ай бұрын

I love the simple and short lessons ... so excited to start this next week!

@SevenInAll 3 ай бұрын

Yay, Gina! I'm glad to hear you're starting so soon!

@pattimerl3127 3 ай бұрын

We've been working tbrough a tough medical diagnosis this schook year. We are definitely going to use this tool. Thank you so much for sharing your wisdom with us. We just finished a book about Teddy Roosevelt that really highlighted all the things you said. That is how he lived his life, no excuses!

@SevenInAll 3 ай бұрын

That sounds very difficult indeed--it's tough to walk through the 'dark valleys' of life. Teaching our children that yes, we will each face truly hard and heartbreaking things, and what matters is HOW we face those hardships....that makes a big difference. History is fully of the stories of those who didn't allow hardships to crush them or defeat them--to become excuses.

@zahrayoder5049 2 ай бұрын

I agree, and please share the name of the Teddy R. book that you read. 👆🏽👆🏽

@pattimerl3127 2 ай бұрын

The book was Take a Hike, Teddy Roosevelt.

@gbcflower 3 ай бұрын

This is phenomenal! I will definitely be checking out the resource your mom has created.

@SevenInAll 3 ай бұрын

I'm so glad to hear this response!

@andreaboyd111 3 ай бұрын

This teaching is an answer to prayer!🎉 I am struggling with the excuse problem of why I cant have self control over different issues in my life. I went and bought this teaching and am printing it out now. Thank you❤

@SevenInAll 3 ай бұрын

I'm so glad that this is meeting you right where your needs are!

@mamafaithto2 3 ай бұрын

Thank you for this video!

@SevenInAll 3 ай бұрын

You are so welcome!

@Kiki-vb3sb 3 ай бұрын

Yes! This video is so valuable! I really appreciate the wisdom shared here.

@SevenInAll 3 ай бұрын

Glad it was helpful!

@brenkm955 3 ай бұрын

I’m so excited for this. I think it is much needed in our current season. Thanks to you and your sweet mom for sharing!❤

@SevenInAll 3 ай бұрын

You are so welcome!

@burkhousehold8880 3 ай бұрын

Loved this video! Thanks for sharing.

@SevenInAll 3 ай бұрын

Thanks for watching!

@lauracampbell7644 3 ай бұрын

I can't wait to do this with my three kids. Thanks for making a unit like this.

@SevenInAll 3 ай бұрын

I'm so glad! We hope it is a great conversation starter and truly shines a light on the damage that the habit of excuse making can do!

@faithfullyinfertile 3 ай бұрын

Oh how I would loooooove to sit down and chat with you and your mom!

@SevenInAll 3 ай бұрын

At least KZfaq makes that a little bit closer to happening...there are some definite good sides to the internet.

@leahkuqo 3 ай бұрын

I cannot wait to do this with my kiddos. This is so incredible. As much as I think my children will learn tremendously, I think that as their mom, I will learn so much more. Thank you ❤

@SevenInAll 3 ай бұрын

I absolutely agree that it's also for us as parents, to recognize when excuses are happening and to recognize the impact of those on our worldview and ability to take responsibility for our own actions.

@StaceyYoder 3 ай бұрын

Loved this. I definitely want to get it.

@SevenInAll 3 ай бұрын

I think these are important conversations to have!

@katebee945 3 ай бұрын

I need to learn this myself to be honest!

@SevenInAll 3 ай бұрын

It's an area where so many of us can grow!

@dianesooter5497 3 ай бұрын

I love your mom. She was just like my mom.

@SevenInAll 3 ай бұрын

I so much appreciate her and the wisdom with which she has impacted my own life.

@victoriasbooktalks8882 3 ай бұрын

Thank you for this! With my son, we talk about perspective. I tell him that from my perspective I know what he can accomplish because ...., and then he tells me what he needs from me to achieve his work.

@SevenInAll 3 ай бұрын

Perspective and the different perspectives we each bring to the table are so important to be aware of!

@lisaroper421 3 ай бұрын

Intriguing idea for a curriculum!

@SevenInAll 3 ай бұрын

Definitely doesn't fit into the normal subject boxes.

@vivafamilia7867 3 ай бұрын

Well, that was an unexpected answer to prayer. Thank you and my teen will thank you later as well.

@SevenInAll 3 ай бұрын

I'm so glad to hear this!

@burkhousehold8880 3 ай бұрын

I knew she was your mom the minute I saw her❤

@SevenInAll 3 ай бұрын

The resemblance runs strong in my family! :)

@Maria_O 3 ай бұрын

I'm dealing with this daily with my dyslexic son. He LOVES science and geography and is always going down rabbit holes to further explore whichever topic we've been studying. BUT (big but) as soon as it's time for a reading lesson involving blending and the such - all of a sudden, he's itchy. 😒

@SevenInAll 3 ай бұрын

Classic! A classic "topic shift"- itchiness. When facing something that is genuinely difficult, it can feel oh-so-much easier to change the subject or become overwhelmingly distracted by itchiness, or our hair in our eyes, or the size of the earth, or any other things. Recognizing this strategy--when both parent and child can recognize the strategy and name it--is the first step in not allowing these "topic shifts" to derail lesson time and hinder progress.

@Maria_O 3 ай бұрын

@@SevenInAll The size of the earth! 🤣🤣 You are right. Thank you for the encouragement and advice.

@sandylawrence3704 3 ай бұрын

This is so so helpful! What would you guys say about a child that really seems to struggle with emotional control, that does seem rooted in some neuro atypical stuff (ADHD/dyscalculia, dyslexia, dysgraphia along with still some melt downs at age 11.) She is making good progress, as am I, in learning to mother her well, but I do find myself making excuses for her. Do you have any tips on how this works out with children for whom there seem to be more problems to overcome.

@SevenInAll 3 ай бұрын

I think that children who have more problems to overcome need the skills of not letting their very real problems become excuses to avoid taking personal responsibility just as much as anyone else. It just means that it's going to take extra work and more effort to make the same amount of progress that a different child might make. That's okay. We each have our own journeys, and it's not necessarily about the speed, but about the direction--is she moving in the direction of taking ownership of her own actions, understanding that she can't "point the finger" at other things but must take responsibility for the impact of her emotions, etc. The temptation to "point the finger" at everything else, at every situation that causes us extra difficulty, is as old as Adam and Eve. But we only see progress when we stop giving into the temptation to "point the finger" at every difficult circumstance we face, and recognize when we're making excuses, and when we're taking responsibility for our own failings and weaknesses. I do believe we all know this deep down, it's one of the reasons we're often drawn to stories of people throughout history who faced immense, very real hardship, both in their own bodies or in their circumstances, and didn't let it overcome them. The reality is that there are many others who faced immense hardship and DID become overwhelmed, and didn't persevere in the face of hardship, and were crushed. Those are the sad stories, the ones we don't enjoy telling or hearing. What makes a difference often isn't the specific hardship, but the way an individual handles the cards they've been dealt.

@sandylawrence3704 3 ай бұрын

@@SevenInAll Rachel, I can’t tell you how this video and now this reply have bolstered me to keep going with her. She is making progress and moving in the right direction, but because the progress toward maturity and grit is so slow, I often grow weary, of doing good. Which is also a problem as old as time☺️ I’m going to do your mom’s excuses guide in Morning Basket, starting on Monday. Having more shared language to talk about what is really going on will be a help! One excuse/complaint I wanted to ask your mom about is work being “for babies.” She is 11 and on AAR level 2 + Explode the Code book 3. She does it, but that is the constant complaint and I’m not sure what to say to it.

@SevenInAll 3 ай бұрын

@@sandylawrence3704 I asked my mom for her response: Well, there are several different ways to response. You could explore what teaching phonics to older children might look like. Because there may be specific components of phonics programs for young children that do seem insulting to an older child. Alternatively, have them just focus on what needs to be learned. Phonics concepts are the same, whether you are in preschool or 92 years old. Once you learn your phonics, you can work on more advanced things. So, if those curriculums are working for her and she can advance in them at her own pace of mastery, encourage her that once she's mastered the concepts, she'll be able to move on to books that are more interesting, etc. But without the phonics skills, she won't be able to get there. Learning phonics isn't just "for babies." It's for everyone.

@sandylawrence3704 3 ай бұрын

@@SevenInAll thanks so much! I covered Explode the Code in lovely paper that looks very grown up and she whizzed through 4 pages with delight. I’m sure there will be a struggle with it soon enough, but we are going to start the excuses unit in the next few days which I think is going to be a big blessing to us😊

@emilyribnicky9410 3 ай бұрын

See the video with mama, click the like button, sit back to enjoy! 😊

@SevenInAll 3 ай бұрын

:) Love that!

@abbyreel2464 3 ай бұрын

Felt like the timing with this couldn’t better better for me and my kiddos. Went ti link and saw best for 9-14. Is this something I could simplify for a 7 year old and very vocal ahead of game language and social skills 5 year old?

@SevenInAll 3 ай бұрын

I already talk about some of the concepts with my 6 year old--we aimed it at tweens because that's often when excuse making can become a big issue, but with kids who are willing to engage in the conversation and look at ways that excuses hinder us, I think it can definitely be used with younger kids.

@abbyreel2464 3 ай бұрын

Great thank you so much!

@StephanieMT 3 ай бұрын

my kids rather have me read to them instead of doing any other type of learning. phonics lessons, math or handwrtting they fight me but when i read to them they like that.

@SevenInAll 3 ай бұрын

That's very normal. It's very enjoyable to be read to. Many children only like to do things they find enjoyable. As parents, we can work on getting them outside their comfort zones and into doing things that aren't enjoyable, but things worth doing anyway.