Busted by a Mall Cop #2 - Officer Corvus Clemmons (ASMR)

  Рет қаралды 514,365

Ephemeral Rift

Ephemeral Rift

7 жыл бұрын

You've been caught stealing again, this time by none other than Arkham Sanitarium's own ASMR Plague Doctor Corvus Clemmons, who is (obviously) moonlighting as a security officer at the bustling Arkham Mall.
00:03:58 Calming hand motions
00:12:25 Chinese iron balls (with chimes)
00:17:41 Duct tape
00:19:30 Rope
00:20:55 Dust masks
00:22:26 Heavy duty trash bags
00:24:45 Drop cloth
00:27:42 Disposal gloves
00:30:02 Scrub brush
00:32:42 Slayer LP "Reign in Blood"
00:36:36 Wooden puzzle box
00:42:22 Skeleton goblet
00:45:22 Funko Pop! Davros
00:49:22 Masters of the Universe mystery mini figure
00:53:23 Minecraft mystery mini figure
00:55:56 Q*bert video game mini figure
00:59:41 Fallout 4 mystery mini figure
01:02:50 Pokemon Sun & Moon Guardians Rising boosters
01:08:48 Magic the Gathering Mystery Box boosters
01:18: 38 A special injection & lights out
Patreon ► bit.ly/1EZgmNi
You can listen to selected works outside of KZfaq:
Spotify ► bit.ly/1V23U60
CDBaby ► bit.ly/1AUt3Jj
iTunes ► apple.co/1xIHLNd
Google Play ► bit.ly/1vPUJgF
And others like Deezer, Rhapsody, etc!
Podcasts:
EphemRadio ► apple.co/2afSkZQ
Arkham Sanitarium ►apple.co/2alraeV
Social Media:
Facebook ► / ephemeralrift1
Twitter ► / ephemeralrift
IG ► / e.rift
What is ASMR? It is both a sensation and a medium.
ASMR stands for Autonomous Sensory Meridian Response and is the current, non-scientific name given to the feeling characterized as a pleasurable tingling sensation felt in the head, scalp, back and other regions of the body in response to visual, auditory, tactile, olfactory, and/or cognitive stimuli, such as crinkling bags, hand movements, whispering, personal attention or watching someone perform a task. It's like goosebumps, but much more pleasant.
ASMR videos are meant to intentionally help induce this sensation, also referred to as "tingles", but also provide a relaxing, calming, soothing, therapeutic and even entertaining experience for the viewer.
Many people who do not experience ASMR still enjoy the videos for their calming and sleepy effect.

Пікірлер: 1 400
@EphemeralRift
@EphemeralRift 7 жыл бұрын
Reward for anyone who finds Corvus' tie that he lost somewhere in the mall.
@Z_coburn
@Z_coburn 7 жыл бұрын
Ephemeral Rift check in his food
@Sapphoroso
@Sapphoroso 7 жыл бұрын
Ephemeral Rift you should have bought me some food :(
@ashvslife
@ashvslife 7 жыл бұрын
Has he checked his beak? You can fit quite a bit in there
@jpeike1314
@jpeike1314 7 жыл бұрын
Ephemeral Rift your the best unkle E
@zzlord4309
@zzlord4309 7 жыл бұрын
Do plague doctors wear ties; unless he holds in inside his shirt or is it some referance from the film Paul Blart : Mall Cop?
@bohdanvondabelsky5972
@bohdanvondabelsky5972 7 жыл бұрын
ER: I want to make ASMR to help people sleep ER: *makes a universe so interesting with quirky and iconic characters that people don't want to go to sleep*
@ratedasmr7811
@ratedasmr7811 6 жыл бұрын
Someone should start some fanfiction
@andrewramlall3560
@andrewramlall3560 5 жыл бұрын
Rift is awesome at world building
@bwing6265
@bwing6265 5 жыл бұрын
I attempt to draw these online.
@vincezockt127
@vincezockt127 4 жыл бұрын
@@ratedasmr7811 yup
@Kindaprettycure
@Kindaprettycure 4 жыл бұрын
@@fraisergallant6216 Omg whereeee
@melasmr9756
@melasmr9756 7 жыл бұрын
I don't even know if I watch Eph Rift for ASMR or entertainement anymore.
@nuttygeezer830
@nuttygeezer830 7 жыл бұрын
Don't question it, embrace it
@aespyro
@aespyro 7 жыл бұрын
Mel ASMR why not both
@MattExzy
@MattExzy 7 жыл бұрын
Both! 'Normal' ASMR videos are guys and girls tapping on things. Rift's are him tapping on your brain.
@waitingwillfill
@waitingwillfill 7 жыл бұрын
Yes
@miple7202
@miple7202 7 жыл бұрын
I am no doctor, but that does not sound good for ur health if he is tapping on ur(or my) brain
@c.r.4985
@c.r.4985 6 жыл бұрын
Corvus isnt even being subtle. He's just like, "Okay Im going to knock you out and the bring you to an asylum to be experimented on."
@RRTSMPlayz
@RRTSMPlayz 4 жыл бұрын
For me,I just don't care.......
@acrazysheepdog1555
@acrazysheepdog1555 4 жыл бұрын
If I heard that, I’d be freaking out big time.
@bumblemcgrumbles7720
@bumblemcgrumbles7720 7 жыл бұрын
You gotta hand it to Corvus. He's a doctor, the pope, Santa Claus, a security officer, and probably more. Dude knows how to make the most out of his part time jobs. Gotta feed his family *somehow* I suppose.
@simonsarvari285
@simonsarvari285 7 жыл бұрын
TheGreenNinjaGamer Corvus is the next Johnny Sins...
@DiggerDeeper01
@DiggerDeeper01 6 жыл бұрын
Simon Sarvari Plauge Doctors fell on hard times when the plague died out.
@plaguedoctormasque8089
@plaguedoctormasque8089 5 жыл бұрын
The Plague doctor/Corvus Clemmns n 2020!!!
@ms.kuntmuffinstwatwaffles9262
@ms.kuntmuffinstwatwaffles9262 5 жыл бұрын
@@plaguedoctormasque8089 Fix your misspelling. lol
@hunteradams9994
@hunteradams9994 4 жыл бұрын
Well it couldn't be to feed his family because he is a cook too
@Squidly3005
@Squidly3005 7 жыл бұрын
you know the mall needs extra security when a chair is wanted for shoplifting.
@alexhackett1312
@alexhackett1312 7 жыл бұрын
Squidly 12 As well as a mathematical equation and a dolphin.
@Gakulon
@Gakulon 7 жыл бұрын
Alex Hackett And a dead author
@louiefields2211
@louiefields2211 7 жыл бұрын
except pi isn't an equation, moron lol
@trintle4219
@trintle4219 7 жыл бұрын
Squidly 12 I think that's a Rick and Morty reference.
@christopherweaver9543
@christopherweaver9543 7 жыл бұрын
Don't you dare underestimate the power of that chair, it once took down a lion with its bare legs
@katelnrigby101
@katelnrigby101 7 жыл бұрын
I'm pretty sure shoplifting is the LEAST of our worries with a xenomorph running around
@tingledroid2646
@tingledroid2646 6 жыл бұрын
Jishua God forbid a Shoplifting Xenomorph
@user-py8tf7fz8p
@user-py8tf7fz8p 6 жыл бұрын
It’s a pretty wild mall
@graysonperdue9402
@graysonperdue9402 6 жыл бұрын
Jishua don’t say that it’s racist
@cynthiaerune3554
@cynthiaerune3554 5 жыл бұрын
In a world like ERs lore where cthulu is real, Xenomorphs would be the least of problems
@duelelmies3662
@duelelmies3662 5 жыл бұрын
Or a dalek
@octoberwind3874
@octoberwind3874 7 жыл бұрын
This concept is hilarious. The uniform over Corvus' regular clothes is perfect. I love the absurd-ism of Rift's humor.
@robinhyperlord9053
@robinhyperlord9053 5 жыл бұрын
How is it absurd?
@cdsatcher
@cdsatcher 5 жыл бұрын
Robin Gilliver The fact that a Plague Doctor confirmed to be from the Dark Ages is working a side job as a Mall Cop, and is still wearing his mask all the while. That's absurd, is it not?
@robinhyperlord9053
@robinhyperlord9053 5 жыл бұрын
@@cdsatcher No.
@Molotovyeen
@Molotovyeen 7 жыл бұрын
Corvus has hands? I always imagined another pair of gloves under his gloves
@nomad_9991
@nomad_9991 7 жыл бұрын
Digital_Static their fairly new. He had them put on during the cooking segment in Arkham Sanitariums kitchen
@groove4528
@groove4528 7 жыл бұрын
It's like fighting a boss with two health bars, you get rid of the first pair, and BAM! There's another right there waiting for ya.
@tylerthomas7266
@tylerthomas7266 7 жыл бұрын
Digital_Static kinda like kakashi sensai
@faellcedaer5034
@faellcedaer5034 7 жыл бұрын
"This isn't even my final form."
@yumachinasake2789
@yumachinasake2789 5 жыл бұрын
You remind me of the meme with a guy running around on a police car and he has 2 blue buckets on his head and gets one knocked of to reveal another
@cyn7696
@cyn7696 7 жыл бұрын
in case anyone didnt know, the guy on the right wanted for shoplifting is H.P Lovecraft. Creator of the cthulu mythos and inspiration of this channel itself
@nomad_9991
@nomad_9991 7 жыл бұрын
Cyn I thought it was so funny that he was put in the video.
@mevans7380
@mevans7380 7 жыл бұрын
I thought it was George Bush
@hacksmash
@hacksmash 5 жыл бұрын
@@mevans7380 i thought he was Mark Zuckerberg
@henrydouberly3950
@henrydouberly3950 5 жыл бұрын
Even death may die
@Silkie_Dragon
@Silkie_Dragon 5 жыл бұрын
You sir have taught me a thingg
@stuzanoo7242
@stuzanoo7242 7 жыл бұрын
You must have the weirdest basket on amazon.
@bradenanderson5087
@bradenanderson5087 5 жыл бұрын
Try buying gear for a biathlon on Amazon, ha, there's only so many things to do with a gun AND a ski mask.
@pidgin__
@pidgin__ 7 жыл бұрын
"it may not be fda approved, but we approve."
@hampusnaeselius
@hampusnaeselius 3 жыл бұрын
before its time
@dontlookatmybanner9852
@dontlookatmybanner9852 2 жыл бұрын
Little did you know
@SpaceAgeASMR
@SpaceAgeASMR 7 жыл бұрын
Times must be tough if all of the characters have to take second or third jobs as a security guard. I guess the Sanitarium does not pay so well then, or it pays with something else entirely...
@alexhackett1312
@alexhackett1312 7 жыл бұрын
Space Age ASMR They pay in Tingles, sadly Tingles don't translate into commonly used currency very well. Exchange rates are roughly equal to the Zimbabwe dollar to the British pound.
@SpaceAgeASMR
@SpaceAgeASMR 7 жыл бұрын
Alex Hackett Makes sense, thats a terrible rate. Must have been a hyperinflation of Tingles. While relaxing, tingles don't pay the bills.
@stephenbrouse6731
@stephenbrouse6731 7 жыл бұрын
Alex Hackett brilliant use of the Zimbabwe hyper-inflation crisis by comparing it to the rising British pound. I hear Greece needs some tingles.... on loan, of course. economic jokes ftw!
@alexhackett1312
@alexhackett1312 7 жыл бұрын
Turns out paying Arkham Residents in Tingles as well as the rest of your workforce means that too much of the stuff is made.
@assassinxex
@assassinxex 7 жыл бұрын
stephen brouse tbf the British pound is only rising as it is recovering ,every time our politicians do something it drop again 😂
@exploringwithasmr
@exploringwithasmr 7 жыл бұрын
THE MAN. THE LEGEND
@Obagus00
@Obagus00 7 жыл бұрын
Is Corvus a man though? or something more sinister....
@Surgemus
@Surgemus 7 жыл бұрын
THE BIRD!
@nuttygeezer830
@nuttygeezer830 7 жыл бұрын
Obagus00 He's a manbearpig
@BionicpowerJv
@BionicpowerJv 7 жыл бұрын
Scott Sterling probably is under that name ...... conspiracy?....
@isabellaguevara1389
@isabellaguevara1389 7 жыл бұрын
Thank you! Ignore all the hate, I appreciate people who add the time stamps.
@Thepunishers1235
@Thepunishers1235 7 жыл бұрын
Attention all units, attention all units This is officer big smoke Can someone stop by cluckin bell and pick me up 2 number 9's A number 9 large A number 6 with extra dip A number 7 2 number 45s, one with cheese and a large soda Over and out fool
@neoniakitsama
@neoniakitsama 7 жыл бұрын
and a B O N E L E S S pizza
@el7651
@el7651 7 жыл бұрын
Thepunishers1235 You're out of chicken? Ehh some pizza would be nice
@Groggyracer
@Groggyracer 7 жыл бұрын
With a 2 liter of Coke.
@austinmullis8171
@austinmullis8171 7 жыл бұрын
Samuel H. Kim Memes seem to be dying as a species really
@bingbong6928
@bingbong6928 7 жыл бұрын
Samuel H. Kim its a zambie maymay
@winstonrodney4440
@winstonrodney4440 7 жыл бұрын
I'll be honest, if confronted by Corvus, I probably wouldn't shoplift.
@bitdw-
@bitdw- 7 жыл бұрын
I wouldn't shoplift even if confronted by no one.
@youtubewatcher4955
@youtubewatcher4955 7 жыл бұрын
The Good kid Konata... Good kid...
@aydenmowatt4079
@aydenmowatt4079 6 жыл бұрын
The ok?
@Kokotroko
@Kokotroko 4 жыл бұрын
I'd shoplift to be experimented on by Corvus
@RRTSMPlayz
@RRTSMPlayz 3 жыл бұрын
Same
@thedisendegoprod
@thedisendegoprod 7 жыл бұрын
Have you caught "Pi" yet? I've heard he steals an irrational amount of tingles, and has 3.14 charges against him.
@luciastaylor4940
@luciastaylor4940 7 жыл бұрын
Fortified ASMR He was recently caught shoplifting. I heard he's facing 3.14 years to life
@sleepymandragora1392
@sleepymandragora1392 7 жыл бұрын
They thought they chased him down. Turns out they were going in circles.
@DiggerDeeper01
@DiggerDeeper01 6 жыл бұрын
You’d think he’d be easier to find. I mean he has a tendency to ramble on and on.
@hatz1107
@hatz1107 6 жыл бұрын
Come on guys, you're all being too irrational
@naneto9096
@naneto9096 6 жыл бұрын
diameter times pi
@miyasmith6166
@miyasmith6166 5 жыл бұрын
The moment he pauses at 26:11 and says “Oh.” cracks me up every time. 😂 I love Corvus!
@RabbotThunderYT
@RabbotThunderYT Жыл бұрын
When you find out that you're wife is pregnant, and instead of having a baby boy, it's a girl
@sliceofbread3829
@sliceofbread3829 7 жыл бұрын
Corvus is just the best character I have seen ever xD really like that character for some reason.
@redericson1993
@redericson1993 6 жыл бұрын
Savage Spider It's the visual aesthetic, plus the soothing voice.
@ratedasmr7811
@ratedasmr7811 6 жыл бұрын
Red Ericson and the creaks of his gloves
@aswisscheeseslice7184
@aswisscheeseslice7184 5 жыл бұрын
It makes me horny
@RRTSMPlayz
@RRTSMPlayz 4 жыл бұрын
@@redericson1993 don't forget the beaking
@natsudragneel7516
@natsudragneel7516 7 жыл бұрын
"I assume that you have to fix up your home with this rope" "Nah, I just like bondage"
@theRPGmaster
@theRPGmaster 6 жыл бұрын
The Doctor I suspected murder paraphernalia from the first items
@devin1191
@devin1191 5 жыл бұрын
O-O
@TheFIoridaMan
@TheFIoridaMan 7 жыл бұрын
rescuer of bananas, curer of illness, protector of malls. He is...Officer Corvus🚔
@LuckyArceus
@LuckyArceus 4 жыл бұрын
The Florida Man *boonana.
@RRTSMPlayz
@RRTSMPlayz 4 жыл бұрын
@@LuckyArceus I still remember that the way he said banana.Thats my new trigger XD
@Ari_C
@Ari_C 4 жыл бұрын
"Would you like anything? No? **over walkie** and nothing for my perpetrator." I love this birb man 😂❤❤❤❤
@Sapphoroso
@Sapphoroso 7 жыл бұрын
"I'm sure someone can use a hug" that was great 😂😂
@crowing427
@crowing427 7 жыл бұрын
I smiled like a complete dork when he said that
@Sapphoroso
@Sapphoroso 7 жыл бұрын
saaame
@morgangobin6550
@morgangobin6550 7 жыл бұрын
301reppin' Oh. So THAT'S probably how we got that face-hugger attached to us a few weeks ago. Keep that thing on a leash, Corvus!
@robinhyperlord9053
@robinhyperlord9053 5 жыл бұрын
Toruh!
@jaypeesan1877
@jaypeesan1877 6 жыл бұрын
That "I dont steal anymore because I dont want to loose my job...and also cos government hates competition" line gets me every time...well played sir!
@kingpyrone
@kingpyrone 7 жыл бұрын
I wish he had like a little name tag that said "Mr. Murphy" (or whatever the guys last name was in the first episode of this) to show that he killed that officer and took over that office and took his officer clothes.
@cdsatcher
@cdsatcher 5 жыл бұрын
He most likely works alongside Murphy, and was taking over his shift probably.
@laikaxv1406
@laikaxv1406 4 жыл бұрын
I believe instead of Murphy it was actually Murray, or Murrie, not sure how it's spelled.
@andiandrei241
@andiandrei241 7 жыл бұрын
what is this world coming to when even xenomorphs resort to shoplift
@Marcella_Parker
@Marcella_Parker 7 жыл бұрын
Something that blows my mind is how almost everyone in Arkham and the greater rift world has two or more jobs. Can they not hold down a job? Or is the economy so bad that they need multiple jobs? How much does the sanitarium pay? Are there unions? Who stands up for the plague-doctor out of work? We need answers
@helmaschine1885
@helmaschine1885 5 жыл бұрын
I'm sure they just travel through rifts to try out various professions for a while. Eternity can get boring after all. I'm sure Corvus is very happy working the jobs he has.
@RRTSMPlayz
@RRTSMPlayz 4 жыл бұрын
I DON'T NEED SLEEP! I NEED ANSWERS!
@Braxmegaman
@Braxmegaman 7 жыл бұрын
I like to imagine that Mall Security rewired that radio directly to the Chinese joint in the mall, because Corvus refuses to use it for anything else.
@aswisscheeseslice7184
@aswisscheeseslice7184 5 жыл бұрын
I'd rewire it myself
@hanaortega1263
@hanaortega1263 7 жыл бұрын
The fact that the mall has security cameras recording its own security officers doesn't sit well with me for some reason. If Corvus isn't watching that footage than who is?
@theRPGmaster
@theRPGmaster 6 жыл бұрын
Flame Destara Really interesting point of view
@wjye
@wjye 6 жыл бұрын
I’m late, but more then likely the camera is meant to capture the shoplifters confession on tape as it’s aimed at us in the video.
@jdprettynails
@jdprettynails 6 жыл бұрын
The Professor. The Arkham Sanitarium has its own mall now.
@robinhyperlord9053
@robinhyperlord9053 5 жыл бұрын
I'd say other security.
@andrewramlall3560
@andrewramlall3560 4 жыл бұрын
Trust no one, not even yourself.
@_Weebra
@_Weebra 7 жыл бұрын
that now hiring sign makes me want to see a job interview roleplay
@galelululu
@galelululu 7 жыл бұрын
I like how items 2 through 7 are apparently for home repair but more likely to be tools for performing a kidnapping and homicide
@meow-sv7rc
@meow-sv7rc 7 жыл бұрын
Ephemeral Rift should do a video about reading the puns we make
@morgangobin6550
@morgangobin6550 7 жыл бұрын
Bill Cipher Whenever I see someone comment using Bill's name and profile picture, I always imagine the comment in his voice. Weird.
@HystericalWhim
@HystericalWhim 7 жыл бұрын
Morgan Gobin Same
@heckwaffle2363
@heckwaffle2363 7 жыл бұрын
Bill Cipher that would be a long ass video
@ElectricalSwift
@ElectricalSwift 7 жыл бұрын
It would be a two second long video because nothing here is original.
@asap_madden9262
@asap_madden9262 7 жыл бұрын
arent you dead
@dr.ripper_
@dr.ripper_ 7 жыл бұрын
I can't get a job because of a tiny tattoo on my hand and Corvus can get one and still wear his creepy plague doctor mask
@dr.ripper_
@dr.ripper_ 7 жыл бұрын
ZinnyZin It looks good to me, and it has meaning, again, to me. And I don't remember feeling a thing either so yeah. Dogshit.
@Folbak
@Folbak 7 жыл бұрын
ZinnyZin he didn't pay to "harm himself" and ugliness is subjective. I really don't see why you would not want to hire someone with a tatoo other than being close minded but... perhaps there are more reasons I can't see.
@dr.ripper_
@dr.ripper_ 7 жыл бұрын
ZinnyZin It's okay, no worries. I understand your views on tats, and it's just fine. I never had bad experiences with people that had tats, maybe it depends on the country you live in and the general stigma, something along those lines, but yeah I can respect your way of thinking (:
@theRPGmaster
@theRPGmaster 6 жыл бұрын
Who cares about tatoos, it's like not hiring someone because they bleached their hair
@dr.ripper_
@dr.ripper_ 6 жыл бұрын
No, but I know you wish it was
@b0nkert0ns7
@b0nkert0ns7 7 жыл бұрын
You can tell Rift is a father just from the "wanted" signs on the wall. That's "Dad humor" if I've ever seen it.
@thecusk6918
@thecusk6918 7 жыл бұрын
If Corvus was a patient at the Arkham Sanitarium, his room number would be 049.
@kylerwright3341
@kylerwright3341 4 жыл бұрын
I just shoplifted a few toys and junk and this man is like *alright we’re gonna drug you, kidnap you, and harvest your organs*
@fiazshah3838
@fiazshah3838 7 жыл бұрын
One things for sure. If I see this guy at the door, I ain't stealing shit. Nice work once again Mr Rift
@random_pesh3623
@random_pesh3623 7 жыл бұрын
Loving the posters, especially Lovecraft! Nice work.
@commonsensecommentor199
@commonsensecommentor199 7 жыл бұрын
thanks
@brookesmith7946
@brookesmith7946 7 жыл бұрын
"You're going to some tape and sturdy rope" ummmm... I-it's not my idea my boyfriend wanted to try something new...
@somerandomgamer8504
@somerandomgamer8504 3 жыл бұрын
I know that feeling-
@angry_zergling
@angry_zergling 3 жыл бұрын
@@somerandomgamer8504 A few years ago I presented to the courthouse to resolve a traffic ticket relating to a sting operation by undercover officers enforcing crosswalk compliance. (You are not allowed to cross a crosswalk before a pedestrian clears both lanes of traffic if there is no physical median - which is understood by a good amount of drivers. And you are allowed to cross the street if a pedestrian has already crossed your lane and passed over a physical median...which is equally as understood. BUT! If the median divider is modified to ease pedestrian access (not removed, but inclined or sloped or painted...then legally it is as if no median is present at all and you may not pass the crosswalk until both of the ped's feet hit sidewalk on his/her intended side...which is less understood. Even 'more less' known is that if the crosser is undercover PD and sets one foot upon the sidewalk and then deliberately pauses mid-stride with one foot in the gutter at the last instant to trick people is that the next half dozen cars who pass will all get pulled over by the dozen motorcycle cops waiting on the side of the road for that exact event >=( )) Anyway! Presenting to the court to pay my --entrapment fee-- fine, I had completely forgotten about something - I had a Smith & Wesson handcuff key on my keychain that unluckily was compatible with standard local PD handcuffs, bailiffs' cuffs, enhanced courtroom restraints, and most of the patrol carbine/shotgun lock shackles in their patrols cars. The officer at the xray station noticed it immediately after I innocently placed my keys upon the tray. It was a big hullabaloo because the officer had no idea I was there to pay a $90 moving violation as opposed to surrendering to criminal prosecution. "Is that--...you brought a HANDCUFF KEY to COURT?!?!?!" bellowed the officer, startling the tenish people in line behind me and causing multiple court officers/bailiffs to run over to me. Oh - and my mother was there as my car was in the shop and she was kind enough to drive me and was there in the lobby with me, where she intended to wait as I paid my fine. I only wish the officer I interacted with was as understanding to what I carried as Dr. Corvus Clemmons was to this shoplifter. T_T Instead of bellowing about smuggling escape tools into a court of law. I really meant no harm - I thought it was simply a good idea to keep a handcuff key on me just in case years ago and had completely forgotten I still had it. Oh, boy - was that a mess lol. Quite embarrassing! Thankfully my mother was kind enough to accept my response of 'he mistook the key to one of my safes as a handcuff key' when she asked why I had to surrender my car keys to half a dozen cops and not inquire further lol.
@pxnapplewxrdo2526
@pxnapplewxrdo2526 5 жыл бұрын
Well, when life gives you Clemons!
@nbravender1716
@nbravender1716 7 жыл бұрын
This ain't paul blart
@alterdnothing1855
@alterdnothing1855 7 жыл бұрын
you sure?
@medic7419
@medic7419 6 жыл бұрын
You sure? x2
@rajed
@rajed 6 жыл бұрын
EyelessJack Tklr you sure? X3
@BoyofDestiny
@BoyofDestiny 6 жыл бұрын
You sure?x4
@Bloomdotwav
@Bloomdotwav 6 жыл бұрын
You sure? x5
@austinmullis8171
@austinmullis8171 7 жыл бұрын
"Let me get my Officer utility knife"... *pulls out murder weapon*
@MrStarfireninja
@MrStarfireninja 7 жыл бұрын
Corvus is very adorable
@joeyking8756
@joeyking8756 7 жыл бұрын
MrStarfireninja I love Corvus he's so cute
@mrhalfwit972
@mrhalfwit972 5 жыл бұрын
staph
@vexthepichu226
@vexthepichu226 4 жыл бұрын
mood
@lizardman481
@lizardman481 4 жыл бұрын
how tho
@landonhalloween4586
@landonhalloween4586 4 жыл бұрын
The people who disliked where his family members.
@brookesmith7946
@brookesmith7946 7 жыл бұрын
I think you should make a video of one of your characters opening and working at a thrift store in arkham it shall be called: EPHEMERAL THRIFT!!!!
@pasteldreams5413
@pasteldreams5413 7 жыл бұрын
Now I've had two pun-inflicted face-palms today.
@sarahshine6026
@sarahshine6026 7 жыл бұрын
Brooke Smith I laughed way to hard at that name, this needs to be a video!
@bayman918
@bayman918 7 жыл бұрын
and then he makes a video about being a race car driver and calls it EPHEMERAL DRIFT!
@greysoncourtney2374
@greysoncourtney2374 7 жыл бұрын
Merry Christmas! I GOT YOU AN EPHEMERAL GIFT!
@greysoncourtney2374
@greysoncourtney2374 7 жыл бұрын
Feeling down? Let's cheer you up with a classic Ephemeral Lift..
@spinosaurusaegyptiacus6425
@spinosaurusaegyptiacus6425 4 жыл бұрын
when your wife says she's pregnant but you wore protection 57:07
@shotdriven1953
@shotdriven1953 4 жыл бұрын
Too bad your comment was late
@Sapphoroso
@Sapphoroso 7 жыл бұрын
*OOOOHHHH HE STEALING*
@Kiki-wf4bj
@Kiki-wf4bj 7 жыл бұрын
I love that vine!!
@natsudragneel7516
@natsudragneel7516 7 жыл бұрын
301reppin' Go get em
@wilhelmthesecond9820
@wilhelmthesecond9820 7 жыл бұрын
301reppin' dead meme
@leaknail5101
@leaknail5101 7 жыл бұрын
Lmfao
@wolfgamerv2321
@wolfgamerv2321 4 жыл бұрын
cop:ohhh by he stealing Man stealing bike:*runs away* Cop: OI GET BACK HERE
@_Nazeren_
@_Nazeren_ 7 жыл бұрын
The "I also don't steal cause the government hates competition" was genius, love the video
@Truthslayer05
@Truthslayer05 7 жыл бұрын
Peoples need to appreciate how well set up this shot is. The poster's spacing, the framing, the lighting... Amazing.
@kyuubyemy
@kyuubyemy 7 жыл бұрын
Ignatius Peter Freely... I pee freely? I see that Simpsons reference E.R
@Sparkz147
@Sparkz147 7 жыл бұрын
Edward Beil Are you taking the piss?
@BlitzBaron
@BlitzBaron 6 жыл бұрын
Well it’s not really a Simpsons reference they just used the joke they don’t own it
@argyldeathbrand6192
@argyldeathbrand6192 7 жыл бұрын
Good luck with the Dalek... whoever lived to report it is probably in the sanitarium now.
@ratedasmr7811
@ratedasmr7811 6 жыл бұрын
Argyl Deathbrand poor Margaret
@hatz1107
@hatz1107 6 жыл бұрын
Poor Margaret? Poor Dalek
@abnormallynormal4614
@abnormallynormal4614 5 жыл бұрын
HATZ Rulez why should we pity a Dalek that will destroy anything that isn’t a Dalek
@reddawn1873
@reddawn1873 3 жыл бұрын
@@abnormallynormal4614 it has the aim of a stormtrooper
@crowing427
@crowing427 7 жыл бұрын
That awkward moment when Corvus is just as bad as the theif 😂
@BlitzBaron
@BlitzBaron 6 жыл бұрын
Actually in the first video he explains that if t was stolen and is under $100 then the guards can keep it.
@hatz1107
@hatz1107 6 жыл бұрын
He owns the Asylum anyways
@RRTSMPlayz
@RRTSMPlayz 4 жыл бұрын
@@hatz1107 but professor Clemmons is the director of the Arkham Sanitarium.... But nahhh who cares , we don't trust that guy anyway.. Update: I freaking hate I commented this
@ZekeStaright
@ZekeStaright 7 жыл бұрын
Was Pi stealing pie?
@thecusk6918
@thecusk6918 7 жыл бұрын
ZekeStaright An irrational amount of it!
@ZekeStaright
@ZekeStaright 7 жыл бұрын
3.14159265 pies
@BelligerentKnight2481
@BelligerentKnight2481 5 жыл бұрын
@@ZekeStaright That's over 9000!!
@jackbeardsley1907
@jackbeardsley1907 7 жыл бұрын
Yes, finally there's a part two we've been asking for
@TooBlxssed
@TooBlxssed 7 жыл бұрын
My dad is the hash slinging slasher
@Sapphoroso
@Sapphoroso 7 жыл бұрын
how's your toy collection lmao
@connorchase2451
@connorchase2451 7 жыл бұрын
Terrance Cheeto man
@xmoellerxd
@xmoellerxd 7 жыл бұрын
Terrance on the hash terrible
@cecillesampson390
@cecillesampson390 7 жыл бұрын
The hash bring Trash being The clash be-ding The cash ringing
@Ty_777
@Ty_777 7 жыл бұрын
I am so sorry
@Cinnablanco
@Cinnablanco 7 жыл бұрын
Corvus: Listen only to the sound of my voice. Imagine yourself, in a frozen forest.
@theshadownarwhal2546
@theshadownarwhal2546 7 жыл бұрын
"It's going to hurt a LOT!" Well that's not going to give me ASMR :(
@fatpanda3305
@fatpanda3305 7 жыл бұрын
For mobile users: 00:03:58 Calming hand motions 00:12:25 Chinese iron balls (with chimes) 00:17:41 Duct tape 00:19:30 Rope 00:20:55 Dust masks 00:22:26 Heavy duty trash bags 00:24:45 Drop cloth 00:27:42 Disposal gloves 00:30:02 Scrub brush 00:32:42 Slayer LP "Reign in Blood" 00:36:36 Wooden puzzle box 00:42:22 Skeleton goblet 00:45:22 Funko Pop! Davros 00:49:22 Masters of the Universe mystery mini figure 00:53:23 Minecraft mystery mini figure 00:55:56 Q*bert video game mini figure 00:59:41 Fallout 4 mystery mini figure 01:02:50 Pokemon Sun & Moon Guardians Rising boosters 01:08:48 Magic the Gathering Mystery Box boosters 01:18:38 A special injection & lights out
@Calibur43
@Calibur43 7 жыл бұрын
Your act of kindness will change the world someday.
@Ben_chesmoor
@Ben_chesmoor 7 жыл бұрын
Thank you honestly , but there is already a couple other if these .
@fatpanda3305
@fatpanda3305 7 жыл бұрын
Ben F I posted mine like 5 minutes after the video was released, so I think I was first.
@nenaddenkovski7870
@nenaddenkovski7870 7 жыл бұрын
this is like the 7394738284729th time i saw this exact comment even though there are 222
@maskedvlogs9628
@maskedvlogs9628 7 жыл бұрын
Damian Skrok Q BERT!?! MORE LIKE JEW BERT! HAHAHA IM HEAD INSIDE
@punkblade1241
@punkblade1241 7 жыл бұрын
Jokes on him he didn't find the memes I stole
@antierkcer
@antierkcer 4 жыл бұрын
"first name?” Ayden. "Middle?-" Austin-- “P? As in Petter?” Sure I guess.
@masterkorg2866
@masterkorg2866 7 жыл бұрын
When he first sat down I fell asleep... Well done
@Imperator_Chrysalis
@Imperator_Chrysalis 7 жыл бұрын
You are my favorite ASMR artist! I watch you videos now for 4 Years and they get better and better. Even after 4 years you still create something creative, new and wonderful. You are the best ASMR artist in the milky way(and the galaxy far far away)
@alexcampbell9423
@alexcampbell9423 6 жыл бұрын
Chrysalis Maria Gwyndolin Zelda Claire von Itzstein I totally agree
@powerdude_dk
@powerdude_dk 7 жыл бұрын
"It may not be FDA approved, but eh... we approve of it, so it's okay" Ahhh.. now I feel more assured xD
@gyroid
@gyroid 7 жыл бұрын
0:00 Hey Vsauce, Michael here.
@thomasloodts5977
@thomasloodts5977 5 жыл бұрын
It's time to stop!
@morpho3931
@morpho3931 7 жыл бұрын
he is such a nice guy
@Pieman10101tx
@Pieman10101tx 7 жыл бұрын
I love how interconnected all of Rifts videos are, Joel is the infamous Arkam shoplifter.
@rngsquadopps1391
@rngsquadopps1391 5 жыл бұрын
*tackles some lady on a chair* that chair is wanted mam!!!
@NightShadow_digitalphotography
@NightShadow_digitalphotography 4 жыл бұрын
“It may not be FDA approved, but we approve of it. That’s all that matters.” 💀😂 Had me dying 😂😂
@Ari_C
@Ari_C 4 жыл бұрын
Same 😂
@acrazysheepdog1555
@acrazysheepdog1555 4 жыл бұрын
I think we’re like a serial killer in this video, seriously; rope, duct tape, large trash bags, masks and trap cloths even? That just screams serial killer.
@makanacraft85
@makanacraft85 7 жыл бұрын
the gods of tingles have blessed us
@xmoellerxd
@xmoellerxd 7 жыл бұрын
Makana Craft god my friend the god
@justpeace2127
@justpeace2127 7 жыл бұрын
"Im sure someone could use a hug." Someone gunna die
@tabithathecat
@tabithathecat 3 жыл бұрын
Poor Dave.
@RRTSMPlayz
@RRTSMPlayz 3 жыл бұрын
@@tabithathecat F for respect
@tabithathecat
@tabithathecat 3 жыл бұрын
@@RRTSMPlayz F
@tpspeed
@tpspeed 7 жыл бұрын
this is exactly the combination I wanted
@jackjones3657
@jackjones3657 6 жыл бұрын
Love that name; Corvus Clemmons . A lot of thought must have gone into this one.
@GomezUndercover
@GomezUndercover 7 жыл бұрын
Corvus: "would you like anything?' Me: "yeah I would like the same except th-" Corvus: "no? Ok"
@Jesse-ej6jo
@Jesse-ej6jo 7 жыл бұрын
Watching this at about 3am, my mom comes in and instead of telling me to sleep asks "what the hell are you(am I) watching?" And.. well, there's a man in a plague doctor mask, in a shirt, holding a small Davros (which she don't know what it is but have seen as I'm a huge Dr Who fan)PopVinyl figure (which she's seen as I have some), scratching the Davros with his beak.. I didn't lie and told her that "it's for relaxations so that I'll be able to sleep". For the first time in my life she just closed the door and left😂😂😂
@RRTSMPlayz
@RRTSMPlayz 4 жыл бұрын
Good for you but I can't use my phone at the late of night 😔:_(
@winthropsnow7902
@winthropsnow7902 5 жыл бұрын
“It may not be FDA approved, but we approve”. Something seems Fishy around here.
@oogabooga5732
@oogabooga5732 7 жыл бұрын
sometimes it looks like corvus has a gps tracking device around his neck
@morgangobin6550
@morgangobin6550 7 жыл бұрын
He does usually wear a tie. By the way, have you seen it laying around anywhere? ER is looking for it.
@kylewaters9623
@kylewaters9623 7 жыл бұрын
your name in this video is "I P Freely" XD
@balthasargelt5775
@balthasargelt5775 7 жыл бұрын
Man times must be tough at Arkham if a chair and the mathematical symbol for PI have to shoplift to get by
@jorugemog9596
@jorugemog9596 6 жыл бұрын
Never seen such a good kind hearted comment section
@domled6530
@domled6530 3 жыл бұрын
I like how at 27:04 even Corvus, who experiments on people, is shocked by what we told him and stops squeezing the bag
@mikaelmyers6135
@mikaelmyers6135 5 жыл бұрын
Normal Asmr: I sleep. Corvus injecting me with massive needle: *I Hyperventilate And Have Breakdown*
@christopherm.e.4985
@christopherm.e.4985 7 жыл бұрын
The best ASMR content creator on KZfaq by an army mile
@fandompandom1666
@fandompandom1666 7 жыл бұрын
Legit going through the stages of guilt as you speak
@beanie640
@beanie640 5 жыл бұрын
YOU’LL NEVER CATCH ME CORVUS! *sounds of glass and falling down stairs* ow ow ow ow *thud* owie......
@Howdy_Its_Ash
@Howdy_Its_Ash 7 жыл бұрын
I really hope there is an experiment victim roleplay
@jdprettynails
@jdprettynails 7 жыл бұрын
I always suspected that Pi was up to no good. Hope you catch the bastard, Officer Corvus
@NinjaMonkey088
@NinjaMonkey088 4 жыл бұрын
Man I just love the music in the beginning feels like such a classic noir tune
@MisterFischGaming
@MisterFischGaming 2 жыл бұрын
26:12 god this part made me spit out my drink laughing, you always have that dry humor that is just amazing ER, this is why youre my favorite ASMR artist!
@geese5170
@geese5170 7 жыл бұрын
Wow looks like Paul blart really started cracking down on his weight problem
@fagajcze3510
@fagajcze3510 7 жыл бұрын
Just Imagine that you would've had your jewelery in that frog puzzle and then thief stealing in your house he finds this and he is like : Oh i saw this in ER Asmr vid.
@heckwaffle2363
@heckwaffle2363 7 жыл бұрын
"I'm sure someone can use a hug" plz hug me doc °^°
@BlitzBaron
@BlitzBaron 6 жыл бұрын
“I will have to take Q-Bert back to the sanitarium for treatment. Being locked up in that box for...who knows how long!” That is the biggest excuse to steal some free shit if I have ever heard one.
@kanookie1711
@kanookie1711 7 жыл бұрын
A character of yours should be a cashier. To scan the items and them being able to talk about the items and put them in plastic bags. If you understand where I'm going with this. It's a bad explanation, but it's an idea :)
@tabithathecat
@tabithathecat 3 жыл бұрын
The Shop Man
@alexandrajones8525
@alexandrajones8525 7 жыл бұрын
hands down most dedicated content creator
@KokoroSunagaru
@KokoroSunagaru 7 жыл бұрын
I always ask myself why I feel so at home whenever I relax and enjoy ER's videos. And I will repeat myself. They make me feel so at home. Great videos :)
@lukethiel
@lukethiel 7 жыл бұрын
#1 Best Male ASMRtist on KZfaq.
@wolfyboy
@wolfyboy 4 жыл бұрын
5:50 me: *screams like a little girl*
@RRTSMPlayz
@RRTSMPlayz 4 жыл бұрын
HOLY GUACAMOLE
@magic8ball202
@magic8ball202 7 жыл бұрын
The people who disliked had their phone upside down
@RitzCracked
@RitzCracked 7 жыл бұрын
you watch on a phone? sad lol
@varkusor6899
@varkusor6899 7 жыл бұрын
ClickBaitCentral why?
@user-do8cb4dp9g
@user-do8cb4dp9g 7 жыл бұрын
ClickBaitCentral why so
@bmxdenver1
@bmxdenver1 7 жыл бұрын
ClickBaitCentral you fall asleep on your computer desk?
@RitzCracked
@RitzCracked 7 жыл бұрын
yeah, i listen to this while playing games it makes calmer and i dont rage as much
@truecrimenews
@truecrimenews 7 жыл бұрын
Found your channel last night and you made me sleep 😴 good for the first time in ages. Sir, you are very talented. Thanks for sharing these awesome videos with us
@somerandomgamer8504
@somerandomgamer8504 7 жыл бұрын
I'd love to see Uncle E's tax deductions. He can claim a bunch of random stuff because it's part of his job XD
@somerandomgamer8504
@somerandomgamer8504 4 жыл бұрын
I do not remember typing this... what even
Busted by a Mall Cop #1 [ ASMR Unboxing Roleplay ]
54:59
Ephemeral Rift
Рет қаралды 1,6 МЛН
Corvus Treats Your Upset Stomach | ASMR
1:17:42
Ephemeral Rift
Рет қаралды 1 МЛН
КАК ДУМАЕТЕ КТО ВЫЙГРАЕТ😂
00:29
МЯТНАЯ ФАНТА
Рет қаралды 10 МЛН
Playing hide and seek with my dog 🐶
00:25
Zach King
Рет қаралды 35 МЛН
The First Annual Body Modification Signup at Arkham Sanitarium | ASMR
29:33
Operation: Stress Relief (ASMR)
1:01:59
Ephemeral Rift
Рет қаралды 2,2 МЛН
Ze Face Puncture Experiment | ASMR
51:04
Ephemeral Rift
Рет қаралды 656 М.
Three Mile Island Accident Medical Exam ASMR
50:24
Ephemeral Rift
Рет қаралды 435 М.
[ASMR] Showing You My Figure Collection (for Nerd Sleep)
42:59
FredsVoice ASMR
Рет қаралды 244 М.
A Job for the Rift Cartel | ERU ASMR
1:04:12
Ephemeral Rift
Рет қаралды 538 М.
ASMR | 1950's Vintage Barber w/ Old School Effect | Haircut Roleplay
23:20
Inputting Body Modification Signups | ASMR
59:47
Ephemeral Rift
Рет қаралды 416 М.
The Key Salesman | ASMR
58:19
Ephemeral Rift
Рет қаралды 580 М.
КЕПКА КОМАРОВ
0:16
KINO KAIF
Рет қаралды 10 МЛН