"you're not in control, but actually that's a beautiful thing and that no one is designed to carry that load of responsibility, other than our creator" -Joel

I teared up at the very same moment when Joel had to stop speaking because of the pain & utter vulnerability to regain composure after what he had just confessed---bec he described what I exactly go through every time I used to 'lose control' of my so-called 'neat, little boxed in world'. Nowadays, there is more freedom in acceptance that the LORD is the 'PILOT of my ship and CAPTAIN of my soul'🙏🙏🙏

Hello, my name is Mari, and I am also a recovering control addict. I often repeat the saying in my mind, "Let go, let God" but the amount of times I actually embrace this is not often. Something I am realizing is that, every day I have to fight my own self-will and follow God's will. Every single day and every single moment I have to surrender my life to God. Surrender isn't a one time thing, it is something that I must do every day for the rest of my life. Thank you, Joel, for being vulnerable and for helping me through so many hard times with your music, especially your song "Control"

Emotions...like water...our instinct to grab on with both fists and squeeze so tightly. However God came to me and asked me to do a simple experiment at the sink. fill hands with water. First try to hold it ever so tightly and watch as the harder you squeeze, the less water you can contain, your skin and fingers force the water out and it runs away. Now cup hands under the water so from pinky to wrists the hand form a bowl. Let the water flow into the bowl. See how much more you can hold, it may overflow, no matter what sized hands you have, you can hold more water by gently holding open hands together... Like emotions, our heart and mind want to grasp and squeeze, but you stay in the present, you hold onto more of the sensation more of the peace and refreshing...by gently letting the emotion flow into your heart and overflow out of it... It was a lesson He gave me when in the middle of great grief. I wanted to hold onto the love I had for the daddy I lost...when in reality I could feel more by letting it flow instead of trying to grab one particular moment or memory. Gos so good to help me let go and tune in. He is always right there with a tip or an illustration. our Coach and Counselor. HUGS.

Root of control is fear; root of fear is lack of love. Because perfect love cast all fear. 1 John 4-18 we are all too self involved and less God involved, me first🙋🏻‍♀️

Oh man that was a crazy serious moment for me, not many talk about this issue. But as a person that has this, it's a giant issue. And yes pandemic shock me so much that I fell into debt, not able to land a job, overcame crazy crazy anxiety, and God tells me to worship beyond my circumstances(and that is freedom)! People commit suicide or loose their minds because of terrible situations of life and I'm here worship Christ in the midst of it Hallelujah. Thanks to our Creator and my dear husband for being there for me to figure out I wasn't ever in control of anything and it doesn't mean these circumstances are here to stay for ever. My comfort was in my job and my savings not in Christ.......

Love this, real talk with real people. This is hard to find and I find healing when I hear I am not alone and not the only one struggling.

God is in Control and God is Sovereign. May you be healed by His word and Spirit.

I think control issues can come from growing up in an unsure environment and feeling helpless, so “controlling” what you can gives a brief sense of security, and this coping carries into adulthood bc it’s ingrained. Healing wounds leads to freedom from control. Control isn’t a major issue of mine, but I have others stemming from childhood and I’m walking out healing with Jesus ❤️🥰

Will need to watch this 100 more times. Cut right through to my soul! Thank you Joel for your witness. May God be glorified through His work in you!!

I'm NOT in control...and thats a beautiful thing...

Joel....acknowledging you can’t control everything and everyone is huge step. Thank you for sharing ❤️

Thank you for sharing Joel, it takes courage to share our weaknesses!

I understand completely. We lean on Jesus. We are not in control. It’s not our job. We lean on his finished work at the cross. Hugs.

Thanks for this. I struggle all the time with this. From having a difficult childhood, where I felt powerless. I started feeling safer when I had control. It's a learning process and helps to be conscious of it.

You’re aware and have accepted this as an item to work on, be aware of and stay in front of!! So stay in the moment, if there’s a slip/down moment, acknowledge it and move on!!! Peace…oh what a wonderful thing

Your honesty and transparency speaks volumes. God bless you, Joel.❤

The freedom of depending on God is the most liberating freedom. Because it's having strength to give him what you are afraid of allowing to go wrong. It's okay to give it to God Joel

So deep! Do we question God, for what happens to us or others? 🤔 It’s not our responsibility to maintain control! It is our responsibility to be free and present for others! To let God maintain control! 🙏🥰

Your honesty is so appreciated…you are speaking to someone and helping them immensely! Thank you

What a surreal testimony! Don't we all want control? This will be contemplated today!

Cast all your cares at the feet of the cross of Jesus Christ, let go and let God, there is not one person on the planet that can control everything around them. So many times, after feeling such intense anxiety I had to just turn the situation over to Jesus, then I started to feel better, and this is what Jesus wants, He wants us to rely on Him totally!

Thanks for being real Joel. Dr. Rob Reimer teaches that, " You cannot change that which you will not acknowledge". My greatest moments are times where He is greater than me.

This is highly relatable. I don’t seem to be okay with ceding control. It makes me feel weak. I like to remain on top of everything. And most times, it doesn’t work out. And that crushes me.

Joel thank you for sharing. I have recently started to listen to for King & Country and your songs and the real people you are helps lessen my pain in loosing my grandson coming up on 3 years and trying to heal from the hills and valley of pain my son (grandson's dad's) lashing out at me and then being affectionate and then ghosting me. This roller coaster is painful and I want off but I have 2 other grandchildren to be present and love. Being strong is a blessing and a curse. Truly thank you for sharing it matters to me.

Yes- surrendering to and trusting the sovereignty and goodness of God!!!

I can relate. I too wish I could control things. I want things to go smoothly. I want to order my life to keep away the anxiety of uncertainty. When Joel shared about their shows and how sometimes things don't go as planned, he reminded me of TobyMac's Steal My Show. The chorus is "If you wanna steal my show, I'll sit back and watch you go. If you got something to say, go on and take it away. Need you to steal my show. Can't wait to watch you go, oh, oh, oh -- so take it away." I too need to remember to ask God what He's doing in those moments that are not in my control. For God to steal my show because it's really His. I'm just the vessel He's using.

Oh my goodness!!!! This is so me. Every day. The battle is real

I am going to work to be present with who I am with, and with God. Thank you for this, Joel.

Good direction of thought..... Freedom to be WHO we are in Him, with Each other.... There is so much dynamic in relationship.... You are right, we are NOT in control! In Isaiah- it is the Lord who has measured the weight of earth in a balance.

I'm not a control addict, but, something I want to profess is that, I think with the hardships in my life I have realized that playing the game of tug-of-war with control, with God, is in reality us just pulling the rope from one of our hands to the other by ourselves. I think that's just how far God is from our truths and how we think things should be, because we could never comprehend why He does the things He does. I read the book of JOB recently, and I would really recommend giving it a good read to anyone who struggles with letting go of control. In the majority of JOB, Job and his 'friends' bicker amongst themselves based on how they perceive their contexts and 'truths', trying to give their explanations on this and that about why God let these things happen. But, when God finally steps in, and proclaims and questions just Who is the one that controls all things in the earth, in the heavens, and the stars, all that was told by the human mouths falls into complete silence. We can all stand here and try to fit things how we think they could fit, but, when God comes in, that's it, that's Truth. I'm exhausted, and I'm at a point where, I am so weak that I without hesitation want Him to control everything, because I am stripped completely of having nothing of it. I am on a boat with no steering wheel to grip, and so all I can do is let God control the seas and the wind. We have so much less control than we think. Our very breath and heartbeat is not ours. Thank you Joel, for sharing such vulnerability, I could feel the difficulty to strain out those words in your voice. To everyone who struggles with such great difficulty, I pray for you all, don't take on the burdens that only God can bear.

Saludos cordiales desde Perú Lima capital constitucional.

Thank you for sharing as I too have had to work hard at not having control over everyone and everything. Knowing that God is in control should have been easy for me. But letting go of my control has been harder. I'm 70 now and realize what my control did to my family. Not hearing from my family for years was hard but I did that. Now I hear from my family but not until I spent time asking for forgiveness and apolozing for my actions. I never meant to hurt my family and it was such a hard pill to swallow. I kept on praying asking God to forgive me and asking Him to help me with my words. Now I can relate to my family without showing the old me, "the control freak". Wow! I'm sure I wasn't the only one, but you had the strength to speak out. Thank you. May God continue to give you strength and blessings along your journey. Kathy from Aurora, CO 😇🙏

Joel, you are so right.

I used to be like this for many years with my husband and kids unfortunately 😥 I sure wish I could get those years back but since I realized this and have been praying about it over the past couple years it has gotten tremendously better!

As part of God's elect, our only responsibly is to bring glory to God.

I love an addict, he is my oldest son whom is 50 years old. He has been an addict since his teenage years. My husband and I did everything we knew to do to help him. He was even told to leave teen challenge, I have never heard of anyone experiencing that. He has been in and out of jail his entire life. He has two children that he did not raise. He now has 2 grandchildren, he has only seen the 8 year old 2 times, the 3 year old none. I could go on and on but I pray that he gets his act together before I die. Please please pray for him.

I love and respect your transparency. Thanks for sharing! "Only our Creator can carry that responsibility." I love that. Great wisdom in that realization and it helps all of us who struggle with this...

Joel, thank you for doing this

Mindfulness Living: Being present in the present in God's Presence.

The last long spiritual season of my life I got finally delivered from circumstantial Christianity ( if circumstances are going bad there’s something wrong with my faith walk or it’s time for spiritual warfare). And something I never subscribed to much but is heavily taught in American churches which is the “God is in control” doctrine. Yes God is sovereign. Yes God has all authority, but that does not mean that he controls every thing that goes on in the earth, or everything in our lives. He walks with us, and has given us dominion, and invites us to partner with him, in what he is doing, and by yielding to him and his spirit, we can walk with him, those ways and destiny’s. He also gives us the gift of prayer and his word, but no where in the Bible, does it say that he controls every aspect of our life. He gives us the wisdom in the choice is to choose his ways, but he does not make us do it.

My life is out of my hands and in the hands of my Lord.

We all want some kind of control in our lives and there is nothing wrong with that but for me I try to let God take full control but It doesn't always work out that way. I question God sometimes about certain things and I think we all do. None of us are perfect and I know that to be perfect would be terrifying. I think we all need God's Grace. God Bless you!

Wow. Thank you fir sharing your heart and your struggle. These are words I needed to hear, as a fellow recovering control freak. It’s hard not to be frustrated and upset when our expectations aren’t met, but I’m so grateful that I can give things over to God. It’s not easy, it’s a constant struggle, but it’s worth it when I do. Love you and Luke, praying for you 💜

I am too, and most of my family is. I have learned that there is freedom in surrender. I was born with chronic health issues, one almost took my life in first grade, I had severe asthma and had an asthma attack that they didn't think I was going to make it. God has worked through that and many other health issues I have had, procedures, surgeries etc... To make me realize that I have anxiety, that I try to fix it by "being in control." I see that my family does the same, never resting, never truly just giving it to God. I really started looking within myself and looking at my family and really seeing where we were putting our faith, trust and hope in. Instead of God, it was ourselves, our control, answers, money, jobs/careers. And honestly if it wasn't for all the difficulty, dark times in my life, I would probably still be so anxious and so worried. I would not be present,i would also get so physically ill from worrying on top of everything else. I still as everyone does,have to constantly check myself/correct myself. I'm still working on myself. But unlike how I could be during covid of constantly searching for answers and so forth,I have learned to just be careful, as I would of been when I had severe asthma and to just let go. God has got us. And I have had to distance myself from family. My dad listens to the anxiety and tries to gain the control in a lot of going out of control feeling situations, which I have also had to learn to give to God. My extended family have all walked away from God, or just don't see the importance of it, a lot of them are into crystals and are very lost. There's a lot of alcoholism in my family. My dad also lost his dad a few years ago, his mom has dementia and his dad hid it from everyone for years. So there's a lot there. And my dad will do these group texts to try to save them and they never respond back. And the relationships for really as long as I've been born, they outcast the believers and make fun of God. They aren't very nice people in general, and very controlling. Anywho, I still love them all unconditionally, but I am where I have learned that in my controlling behavior it's also basically fixing, and repainting at times, repainting people, situations to the way you want them. I in the past didn't see the alcoholism, I kept making it something else, repainting it. For me personally I learned it's about just letting a situation, a person etc just be what it is. Lol kept having to sing "let it be, let it be." I've learned some tricks, listened to quite a few songs, and books over it. Joyce Meyers battlefield of the mind book I'd really good. Also the unoffendable book, by I believe it is Brent Hanson. Anywho, you're not alone. I have so much respect for you to be open. You learn to not judge, not expect, to just chill, listen, love and act out your faith and let people learn from that. I also realized and became more self aware of myself and just what was being said to even go into repainting and want to even control or change people. Things like "it would be the worst if my child...." You learn to never say never, to never say well I don't want my child to be this or that,or that those people are the worst. I see also in my own parents how them saying all of that, and then my sibling becoming all of that, that they really don't live in reality, they are so busy trying to fix my sibling, and cover over it all. And then they end up lying/being dishonest with themselves and others. And they really are preoccupied with it, though they are physically there, they aren't mentally there. And growing up with that it was very lonely, my sister bullied me endlessly and quite hard. I was on steroids a lot, and I would get moon face and she would tease me about being fat etc... My parents weren't there mentally, so she would do it in front of them, idk even at this point if it was just for the attention, maybe she too felt lonely, idk, but yeah, my parents wouldn't say anything, never acknowledge it. So for me, I just felt like they all hated me. So many things made me want to be in control.

I love how honest and transparent you and Luke are.

Thank you, Joel, for being so vulnerable. I see myself, more my past, in what you shared. I wish I could share the devotional, Gasping for Grace by Marnie Swedberg with you. It is an amazing 31 day tutorial in understanding grace on a deep and meaningful level. It brought me so much freedom when I finally understood it - I had to read it through five times as I am a slow learner. My best example of how it changed my understanding is that I grew up hearing ‘give it your best then give it to God’, only I now understand that is the definition of works. Grace says, “Give it to God then give God your best.” What an amazing transformational and freeing difference this makes. God bless you with joy and peace and laughter.

The only important distinction which should be made is that we are called to be self-controlled. Self Control is a fruit of the spirit. It is only those things which we don’t control which we should recognize are in God’s hands so we can offer grace to others and relax knowing God is Lord over all things. I don’t have to fix everything or make sure everyone and everything is the way I want or expect it to be.

Thank you so much Joel Samllbone and 99. 1 JOY FM. I deal with the same thing and get stressed out when I am not always in control. It helps me to think that Joel Smallbone from my most listened to band and one of my favorite bands, deals with the same thing. The Serenity Prayer helps me a lot.

Thank you for sharing x

Thank you for the honesty.

Thank you Joel for sharing this it's what it's exactly what I needed to hear... I am dealing with a situation that I have no control over and it has left me feeling helpless. Thankfully your music and words are helping me through this. I remember blasting and repeating For King and Country song "Control" which gave me strength the and trust in our creator to "Burn the Ships". So again thank you for sharing your vulnerability with us. May God bless you as he does me

Yes and Amen ... beautiful thing, meant to be free. Yes be at a loss. He has us.

Good insight Joel. Control as an addiction is a very big issue in the world today. Although it is not surprising when we are constantly told to do better, achieve more, the world is your oyster, etc. Sometimes we have to just do and be happy with the result, after all, we are his handiwork.

I too have had the habit of trying to rush things when they didn't happen when I wanted them to. The Bible says not to look at hardship as something strange and something we should have God protect us from. I'm a better and stronger woman because He DIDN'T. Love you, Joel -keep on fighting, fighter!

Wow I really appreciated this raw account of being a control freak. It made me realize I am one too ☹️

Maybe praying before going on stage that God would be behind the production and everything would go smoothly, but if it doesn't that His grace would sufficient in our weaknesses if everything falls apart. Because God can still have his will done and make something out if the falleness of our humanity or a concert gone awry.

I appreciate your transparency and can relate on so many levels. At work, at home, in the community…I have often been that person planning, executing and making it “perfect”. I consider myself a recovering perfectionist. Control is a socially acceptable addiction that by God’s grace I am releasing.

Joel, you are not alone! We all fall short of His glory. The path is long and narrow but we continue to put our hope in Jesus, the One who can and is changing us. Remember you are greatly loved by our Abba Father. God bless you and family. Amen 🙏🏻🌅🌸

Thank you and your brother for your honesty. It’s refreshing.

I relate to this so well... thank you for your vulnerability Joel! 🙏🙏🙏💛💛💛

Thank You so much for sharing your journey so honestly. I identify so closely. There are armies of us who struggle this way. Our God is big enough to transform and renew us! Praise God!

Thank you for opening up. I found my self in some what..to controll ecerything.😢😢😢

God made us in His image, but only He is perfect. God did not create us to be perfect. He created us as human. And human beings are far from perfect. Knowing that, we are still loved, and loved so much, that Christ died on the cross to assure we would be forgiven our sins. So, none of us is divine, but only meant to serve and obey to the best of our abilities. That doesn't mean we must be perfect, far from it. We are each of us meant to use our special abilities to thank and praise our Lord. And Joel, your music does EXACTLY THAT! Your music has most certainly touched the souls of millions of followers, including my own. When my day is going poorly, I simply hit your playlist, and I am TRANSFORMED to a different realm. Your music reminds me of my faith, my beliefs, and why I continue to strive to follow the teachings of Christ in this often soul crushing world. To me, your music makes me feel closer to my God, hearing his teachings put into song, and sung by angelic voices. Do not ever doubt you are enough. God made you EXACTLY who he wanted you to be. Thank you for sharing your faith and your talents with the world in the form of your music. And please don't doubt the power of your words put into song. I know you have saved a multitude of souls, and your work is far from done. 🙏🕊️ 😇

Your Songs are about all of those things. They were carrying me during my hard time, just because you experienced this hardship. God bless you. I am fine now because of you and your songs. Now I will pray for you.

I needed to hear that today. Thank you.

This is very powerful....there is indeed healing in vulnerability

Oh my goodness do I relate to this, it’s literally like a prison to feel this way. I’ve just been told I have Perfectionism and it’s a struggle. I’m asking for prayers to overcome this in Jesus name!

You will be an inspiration to many by coming out like you have and showing others that even though we are Christians we still have to deal with things and overcome through Christ. hugs

That's for the realness. Many blessings. Thank you 💕

The intro there demonstrated this by addressing the ones filming. But bless your and my journey to trust let go and be safe

Thank you for putting words to my mind struggle. And how it negatively affects my closest relationships. The need to control situations and people is a common trait of co-dependency.

So well-said, Joel. I relate and appreciate the real talk. It is refreshing and encouraging and inspiring to hear the truth of your wrestling. You lifted me up today, brother!

One thing i know God make ,for you face for you nice everything and is verybeautful ,thank to the lord.

We are only human, Joel. God has a plan that He will prepare for us to accomplish. It is the release of that control to our Creator.

Trust “moment by moment.”

When he make the world he see is beaut .everything is beautful ..most people to thing not come from him .he is kindness for everything .for i learn from God giveing .people just put thing very worng .cant explan .,that is why we working to put every relation ship tagerther.the order from the healer .

Thank you so much for sharing! Your encouraging words mean soooo much!! I see, and know your pain....I too, am a recovering "control freak". So many times, we look at other's and their lives, and think how perfect their lives are....we truly do not know what goes on behind closed doors...I am learning how to "let go" of the things and situations that I do not and can not control....and I am so VERY thankful God teaches me something new everyday...

IT'S ALL IN YOUR COMPLETE AND CONTINUOUS FULL CONSECRATION TO GOD THE TRINITY!!!

This is a God send for me. Thank you.

Wow I really needed to come across this video.

You're such an strong person ❤ I'm sure that this have helped a lot of people ❤

Thank you Joel for being open and honest,,,that took real strength. We All have to make that step in our life in letting God take over ,, I pray for your continual freedom ,,, the truth sets us free and your on your way to total freedom from all the pitstops,,,praise God for YOU,,, been a blessing in my life !

I needed this. Thank you. ❤

Wow. This is for me! 👏🏽

Oh Joel your a good man

Powerful story that hits very close to home 🙁 Lord I relinquish all control to you, loosen Lord the grip of control over my life 🙏 in Jesus mighty Name 🙏✝️

I got really emotional. I know that feeling.

That’s why I love their song Relate.

Thank you for giving this to us, going beyond your vulnerability in your songs and getting personal with us!

So needed to hear this. Thank you…truly🙏🏼

Bless your heart Joel I know how you feel.

Thank you for saying that so honestly. It is so hard for me to let go too.

Well done brother! Thank you for sharing your experience with us. You are on my forever prayer list ❤

I love you Joel! I hope you are doing well. I understand your pain! Stay strong!

Joel,thanks so much for that.I think this is a struggle for many people who are natural born leaders.They are so great at getting things done,accomplishing a task.Control can creep in and rear it's ugly head,and we don't see it.I do believe that our personality traits have a positive and negative side,and it's all in how we express them.Any parent sees it in each of their children,and the really smart parents see it in themselves.Persistance,for example is great,when we raise funds for the homeless,or help a sick friend ,etc.Persistance can flip when we push to get our own way,in selfishness.Finding a balance between doing our best and setting a goal versus understanding that it might not go that way because we are not in charge of others .Leaving room for space and grace,and God's direction is a better way.

Your Human Lead by The Holy Spirit. Well Done. BLESSINGS 🌟 🙌🏻

Thanks for sharing, Joel. This helps all of us with control issues.❤❤❤

Thank you for sharing. It was really impactful.

Beautiful and truth thank you