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[lyrics]
[verse] If God has rejected your worthless soul,
If Buddha leaves you empty as a blow-up doll,
If Allah's all a bunch of poppycock,
And if El Ron Hubbard is dumb as rocks,
If you're lost and adrift then come on in!
We worship fried dough and cinnamon!
Churro Church!
[chorus] Churro Church!
No sin and no stigmata!
Churro Church!
Just treats and some Horchata!
Churro Church!
If you want to see Heaven, you're on the right track!
Churro Church!
Eat them until you have a heart attack!
Fiesta!
[horn solo]
[verse] There's no need to repent! There's no need to confess!
Just be sure to use a napkin to prevent a mess.
[chorus] Churro Church!
Welcome, hermanos y hermanas!
Churro Church!
With strawberries or bananas!
Churro Church!
Churro Church!
Churro Church!
Just follow your nose to aroma divine,
Churro Church!
(We're) located near the Walmart on Exit Nine!