♥️♥️♥️ I'm glad we have a bit more resource for autism these days. Some people are still dweebs, but that's ok. 🥰

I’m happy for you that you had an emotional safe space that many children don’t feel like they had.

Tell your mum I said she's awesome.

Hahahaha.... That was me and those parents were my parents. But, I learned how to be a lady! 🥴

As an autistic adult all of these are hella harmful and will make the symptoms worse.

I'm so sorry that happened to you

Red flag. 🚩

If they make me cry I’m over them.

I really hope there was either a LOT of therapy or a divorce following that incident. Anyone who treats you like that doesn't deserve you. I'm sorry you went through that and I hope you have loving and supportive people in your life that will step up and help make sure that *YOU* are being cared for as well!

​@@KatieCottingham I definitely agree that therapy or counselling is a good next step. It's just unfortunately not accessible to everyone even though it should be

Because it is false. Stressed and grateful are both emotions. And they are on opposite ends of the emotional scale. Stressed is a negative emotion of feeling overwhelmed and a time shortage consciousness. Gratitude is feeling of being blessed or abundant from acknowledging things that are in your life that are pleasing. If you are saying you are both stressed and grateful, what you are really saying is that you are feeling stressed because you are focused on the things that you believe you are obligated to be/do/give, and are feeling unable to accomplish. But you do acknowledge that there are things in your life that you have and would not want to loose. However you are not feeling gratitude in that moment because your focus is in a place that is causing you stress. You cannot be in 2 places at the same moment in time. Thus, you cannot be stressed and grateful at the same time. How you are feeling is purely determined by what you have been focused upon. This is a Law of Attraction teaching.

​@@Trooperuss what about eustress vs. distress? When someone we loved dies ok it is difficult to be grateful (maybe some sort of relief when we looked after sb over the years) but when it comes to positive events in life eg. wedding, birth of a child? I can be very stressful, new chapter in life, new responsabilities, but, at the end, I can also feel a lot of gratitude as I gave birth to a healthy child. We love our kids and we are grateful they are with us, but sometimes parenting is exhausting. A human is a complex creature with complex emotions and yeah I think both emotions can be combined. Not sure how Law of Attraction explains it.

​@@Trooperusshi there, thanks for sharing. I gotta say that there's a practice element to what you mention, which therefore requires time and other factors. Being very layered beings we have a whole journey to harmonise our knowing, our emotions, body, and all related - while on the day-to-day we live in that process. We may also swing focuses v quickly in our day and with external pressures, so at the end of the day one may have felt stress and gratitude at different times, or both intellectually and bodily speaking (laugh is relaxing but it doesn't remove somatic tense memories in the whole body for example). So in my practice I see we can contain a lot in a bunch of continuous moments in one single day. So the human experience in video stands as real, and the expression of being stressed and grateful at same time also stands unless we dove into levels and locations of both stress and gratefulness being experienced at that exact moment... The thing is again that people may not stay at perfect state all the time... Anyhow, thanks, all the best❤

​@@Trooperussno. You can be grateful OVERALL and still be stressed. Some people have really stressful jobs but they love their jobs. And you can love having kids but it's still exhausting.

I saw somebody post that recently and it totally resonated with me. And before that I had said something very similar to someone

Beautifully put! ❤

But what if the problem they're having is a consequence of the choices they made? What if they refuse to learn from their mistakes and instead keep making the same mistakes repeatedly and then ask for empathy? To me, that's enabling poor behavior, and when we do that, we're not doing anyone any good. Sometimes, tough love is necessary. Either stop making the same poor choices, or stop coming to me to complain about the easily forseen consequences of said choices and find a therapist. I'm not getting paid to listen to someone whine about the same things, over and over again, and I have no intention of absorbing someone else's stress because they're refusing to grow up.

That is typical trait of a narcissist. If you tell them a problem they will make you feel even worse instead of helping you solve it or be empathetic towards your feelings or be helpful.

@@TulipsAtSunset Showing empathy makes people more likely to be receptive to criticism. There are limits to how much grace you can give someone who is complaining about problems that they created for themselves, but even then, you can always acknowledge that making changes to address those issues is still hard.

​@@Lovecats956not everything is narcissm. Complaining to someone who maybe doesn't want to hear it could be labeled as narcissism by your standards.

Well-said!

Yup. Unfortunately.

Don't agree, and I full time mom, attorney, wife, business woman. So are My 3 sisters, My Mother (less the children) at 80 years old, and My grandmother rip and great grandmother rip, And they had more children, and Even Made their own clothes, hats, globes and they did not have The technology we have. And went through horrible economical/social/political upheval.

Welcome to the life of men.

​@@Flywithnowingsisawalk No ❤

We all need to be heard

Simple little interactions like this can be so validating and helpful to both the receiver and the giver. I walked by a deaf kid/guy on the sidewalk the other day. He was trying to order food on his phone and it was so hot outside. He looked up at me in his frustration and sighed, fanning his face and attempting to say the word “hot”. I stopped and said “Yeah!! It’s HOT!” While pulling on my long black pant legs, indicating I was not dressed appropriately! That simple interaction made that guy’s day! He laughed and yelled to his friend on the front porch! I could still hear him laughing as I was down the street. It was clear that most people would just pass him by and not interact! My point is not to brag about a kind gesture that I made! I am still thinking about this young man’s joy at simply being acknowledged on the sidewalk! It has been 3 days! I believe it has helped me far more than it helped him!

@@jeanlapoint8297 are you still wearing long black pants in the summer?

❤

When people say this to me, I just get more frustrated because sometimes I’m so upset that I just want others to come down to my level and feel it with me and to just say that, doesn’t make me feel like they are/do care at all because that’s all they have to say. While I know that them coming down to my level won’t fix my issues, sometimes I feel like if they could see it from my perspective it will make me feel better about it instead of just standing there telling me that it is frustrating when I’m already clearly frustrated! 😂 sometimes I feel like people say that when they just want me to shut up and stop complaining about something that feel so strongly about and they really don’t care. It shuts me down, makes me feel even more frustrated about the situation and makes me not want to talk to them anymore because I feel like that don’t care as much as I do about why I AM so frustrated. On the flip side, after I have had a chance to cool down for a bit, having been told that, over someone going off on a tangent with me about my frustrations, I have more of an opportunity to see things from a different perspective that if they didn’t come down to my level, it really wasn’t all that worth the effort to get as hyped up about as I thought… so in a weird way, it was still helpful, just not something that I could see in that perspective in the moment through all my frustrations at that time.

Hey- I'm autistic also and was thinking the very same thing. I usually have no idea how to respond when people are in stressful situations like this. I probably would have said, “Really- that's not good. Summer is just starting. Are there some activities you can use as a go-to for when they start acting up?” I tend to be a fixer and skip right past the validation part 🫣

I am Autistic and my youngest is Autistic. I have done it differently than my mom who in my opinion is Autistic too.

Autistic too and taking notes : validate feeling.

​@SsroseL at least you wouldn't be turning it around on them.

​@crybebebunny apparently, each person finds something different that works for them. Nothing is a one-size-fits-all.

Unfortunately, too many people are stressed and upset all the time and complain about the same things every day. In that case, "sucking it up" is something they really do need to do. Mental resilience is a skill that most fail to develop, and I'm sorry to tell you this - but you're not entitled to sympathetic ear every hour of every day. Constant whining and complaining drags others down with you. It's unacceptable to act like a toddler when you're a grown adult and, in some cases, a grown adult with a toddler and expect others to manage your emotions for you.

​@@TulipsAtSunsetThis person literally mentioned in the comment that sometimes "sucking it up" is necessary, because their criticism is with the mindset that comes with that term. Though I imagine you were too eager to project your own experiences and problems to actually read it for more than two seconds.

I heard that phrase all that time growing up…from both of my parents, and all 5 of my siblings. I was the youngest, and was taught I couldn’t have emotions and that I could only care about the emotions and needs of my family. 😔

But we don't have to care about your stuff, that is the point. You saying it's mean when someone isn't interested in your hardships is childish. Yes, we should be nice to each other. Doesn't mean I have to listen to your yapping to be a good person or not mean. Go to a therapist or speak to ppl who have the same problems. But don't expect everyone to be your personal complaint box. Some ppl might just have been through too much and can't take your ish too or get triggered by the things you say. Go to a professional, family member or a good friend you can talk to. Those who actually care about you won't tell you that they are not interested. But society in general doesn't owe you to listen or be interested. Grow up.

​@@tallulahraccoon3832 Who said every random stranger needs to care and listen? I saw this video as a mother who shared her stress/overwhelm with people close to her (her spouse and mother, perhaps?). And I think that's what op meant: if these people who are close to you completely disregard what you're sharing, that's pretty mean.

Is there a mom help group near by? Just so you can talk to someone? Maybe move together with another mom and raise your kids together.

So sorry you're all going through this:( I am one of these kids... but as an adult looking back, I can say the love my mom gave (and continues to) far outweighed the money we didn't have. In reality, it brought us closer together and taught me what real value is in relationships and what it is not. Money comes and goes but loving and caring connections last lifetimes 💞 It's a hard path and sounds like you're doing the best you can. So keep optimistic and look for support in other ways and other people. My mom found another mom with 2kids going through the same thing... they combined us all into one house and honestly it was the best experience of my life! Wish you and your children all the best 💓 and because of your strength your children will be strong too 🌞

Supportive hugs to you!!

It’s so rotten how the abuser gets everything and the abused get so little - but you and the boys get peace being away from him and somewhere in your future is a kind partner - you deserve it! My ex moved away, married had another child, stopped paying child support - but I never stopped paying for counselling for my daughter. I got into horrible debt - then he stole my daughter from me by enticing her with happy family visions of growing up with her sister (I was so glad she did have a sibling)promised her a dog but got a bunny for the little one instead. Just letting you know - it gets better - I met a wonderful man - first thing he did was pay off my debts. My daughter was extremely independent. She did so well at school and work, even though she lived through her dad’s 2nd divorce - she’s married and is raising 3 kids in a stable marriage - so just know life can & does get better, especially for your children. Hang in there. I’m sure your boys will be good men. ❤❤❤

I'm glad you are free from that! But, I feel for how hard the times will be for you . I have a niece in the same boat and she's doing "okay" . She'll never ask for help and barely talks or sees anyone.

Yeah, I babysat a one year old during workdays one summer and it made me real cautious on who I pick and when I have a child.

As a stay at home mom… it’s the hardest thing I’ve ever done and I only have one. I’m more stressed out being a stay at home mom than I ever was being an active duty Navy Riverine and police officer.

I'm child-free for many reasons (some medical), but one of the major ones is that I'm absolutely terrified of taking care of a child. They're so fragile! A moment I think is inconsequenial can have a huge impact on them! I don't think I'm even remotely qualified to raise a whole entire other human being from day 0, there's so much that can go wrong!

I found having my own child different, and in some ways easier than babysitting. I was prepared for it be like babysitting but 24/7. It was much harder in other ways, of course. Ways you can't predict. It's worth it, in my opinion. It's also not for everyone. Different people will also find different things hard. I had an easy baby, but the toddler/preschool years were so hard. I have many happy memories, of course, but those years were hard. I mostly don't miss them. It surprised me, as I love working with toddlers and preschoolers. Parenting one is a whole different animal.

I had this when I worked in special education classrooms. Sometimes the parents would say they didn't know how we handle it ( a class of kids) and all I could think was "I'm not having to take them home. They're here 6 hours max." Then I got my own and they don't go anywhere 😂

I agree! Society needs to see the value moms make in the home. We work HARD we just don't get paid for it. And work that isn't paid should be valued because we are taking care of the family and raising the next generation of amazing future adults that will bless our society. What could be a better calling than that?! 💯

@@angieblake3424exactly. The other day I really wanted to tell my husband that if I died there would be no one to drive the kids to their extra curriculars and doctor appointments and take care of them when they're sick and do the laundry and cook ALL of the food EVERYDAY and clean the house and scrub the toilets etc he would have to do all of that on top of working everyday!!! It would be impossible for him. I'm sick of men thinking women have no value at home.

@Egh0127 yes, how true this is. We do a LOT of work but because it is unpaid and behind the scenes, they take us for granted.

Except it isn't exactly true. Food, housing, clothing, vehicle, health insurance, etc. are all being provided from the man's income if she doesn't have one. So while you may not explicitly receive a paycheck, you are being compensated in other ways.

@@JohnTyler-oh5rsOh goody, so we are given a meager and begrudging allowance for doing multiple jobs? Nanny, housekeeper, home organizer (because cleaners won’t do that), laundry service, personal shopper and chef… If you were to pay someone who wasn’t the child’s parent to do all the jobs, it would be more than most people’s take-home pay. That huge cost SAVINGS isn’t recognized, though, because our work isn’t valued.

It gets easier the more you practice so start right now and get up, go say something caring and apologise for a part instance of being unsupportive.

just do it now, your wife has been waiting

I hope the road forward gets easier. Ingrained habits are a bitch

It's never hard to change a habit if it affects the people you love. Stop blaming the habit when the blame lies with you. Do the freakin' work! If you're an adult then you're capable of managing what becomes a habit and what doesn't. God, I can't stand people that think like this!🤦🏻‍♀️

Go let her know that, if she doesn't already. Trust me, it's always in the back of her mind.

Family?

My god, that's truly a blessing. What a wonderful community you have!

That first phrase can come off as rude, though. I know when I first read it and thought about who I might say that towards, my initial reaction was that it wouldn't go over well. Do you want me to help or do you just want to talk? Sounds like do you actually want help or do you just want to bother me? To them.

@@Letycs Trust me, from someone who has had people constantly try to swoop in and fix things when all I wanted was to vent and feel heard, being asked if I wanted help or if I wanted to talk is a god send. If the phrase comes off as rude then someone in the equation doesn't understand the value talking things out and the person probably would have rejected any form of help anyway

@@lillimay98 I didn't say it wasn't, just that for me the first person this advice applied to in my head would take it a completely different direction. For example, she grilled some chicken for the 4th. It wasn't bad and I'll still eat all of it, but it has the texture of raw chicken and I like it better when she does it in the oven instead. So I said it was okay, but I preferred it the other way personally. She threw a hissy fit saying that she was 'being chastised for doing it the 'wrong' way' when all I said was that I simply preferred the other method.

That part

I’m so sorry. You don’t deserve that. If it were me I’d say thanks for making me feel like a worthless piece of 💩 you ungrateful bastard. But I’m snarky like that. I divorced my ex of 32 years. Very happy now.

If he doesn’t respect you and you do nothing about it, then what message are you sending your kids?

Maybe saying something like "I am for you and not against you. Please stop making a hurtful comment about me". May it sew a seed of need on your part. If you get laughter back, then just walk away. Your need was stated. Giving attention to their laughter fuels their control. We seek unity, not division. Good for you to take advantage of some work in your new season. God bless you.

If he is telling you and your children that what you do is easy and of little value, it’s unacceptable. Tell him to educate himself and get a therapist to teach him how to interact with his equals. If he won’t, pack up and leave. This disrespect will only get worse. He seems to need to feel superior by making you inferior. Your children must not grow up to be misogynists.

​@@jennacallahan85wait.. so it's her job to stop him from being a mysoginist, not his job to not be one in the first place? I think you got that backwards

The kids dad would tell me I chose parenthood, but actually what I chose was to parent HIS children, believing we would do it together. Instead he leaves, then eyerolls from the sidelines 🤪 there comes a point when you just have to stop listening and turn to people who get it

Well that sounds that he actually had a point. You were choosing him over and over while it was not a good choice. So you suffer until you choose something different.

@@marki57686 yes that’s true. I’ve learnt a lot 😌

​@@marki57686doesn't change that he used this an excuse to be shitty to her and not change his behavior. If you have a kid, it's also YOUR kid. He can't make it her fault bc he chose to be a parent too and needs to take care of it. Yes you should leave but also he shouldn't be shitty to his partner. She's trying to find solutions and he just goes "no you choose this". That's not on her for trying to make the relationship work

Right, but at the same time, you both chose to be I'm that situation. So you take what you get and it's a two way street regardless. How often did he have to stay late at work and not be able to spend time with the kids at all.

Hugs to the TEACHERS with More than 25 students ( we don’t relax in vacations, we are recovering )

As a former teacher and now a parent, both teachers and moms​ don't go on vacation, they are recovering @@linmeco

You are an angel to those moms and kids. That is real empathy in action. I'm sorry you didn't have the support that you needed and deserved.

I never had help in the beginning, a woman like you would've been an angel for me. I was so overwhelmed it almost killed me with my PPD. I almost became a statistic.

I'm still a young mom (my kid is 2) but I'm the same way. I had horrible experiences when I was pregnant, when my son was new, and even when I was a child myself that have shaped me into a more sympathetic person. I literally got fired for having morning sickness. I had people tell me tickling my son (while he was laughing his little butt off) was harming him. That drinking my morning coffee was going to give him ADHD (as if my ND genetics aren't going to be passed down to him, anyway lmfao). I've heard it all so every time my mom friends are overwhelmed, I do for them what I wish people had done for me. I lend an ear with no judgement and offer as much HELPFUL advice as I can. If they're comfy with it, I'll clean their house and take the baby off their hands so they can get a nap in. I give them ideas and send resources their way. And that goes such a long way.

Outstanding. I'm so thankful for all of the help I have gotten (concrete and emotional both) since my husband of 18 years sprung our divorce on me, and I'm hoping I can be so supportive of others when I again have the capacity. So thank you from all the currently needy people out there!!!

Omg you're a saint

Because it’s a lot. I understand being stressed out or overwhelmed by raising kids, too, and I’ve ALWAYS wanted kids.

I'm a SAHHM, and I recently became a mom of two. My oldest is six and we had hit a point where he is self-directed in a LOT of areas in his life. Jumping back to the constant care and attention required by a baby has been HARD. I completely get where you're coming from, guilt and all. You're not a bad mom for feeling tired, stressed, frustrated, etc. This is such a difficult job and you don't get a vacation from it. It is absolutely okay for you to feel things other than constant joy and fulfillment.

It feels like you were just brainwashed by church. Bcs every normal woman would know how hard is to be a SATHM and on top of that being constantly invalidated

As a SAHM… I’m with you. It’s so hard. It’s beyond hard. I struggle most days. What keeps me grounded is God. I remind myself that he won’t give me anything I can’t handle. I definitely do want to just throw in the towel some days. Having just a day to myself would be so nice.

@@sidneybuckaloo yes. It WOULD be. And mothers could use some days to themselves.

Suddenly they realize just how insane it is when they have to do it themselves, lol. People really have no idea if they’ve never done it for more than a day or two.

This video is symbolic of a larger problem with modernity, explaining the increase in depression, overdoses, and self-deletion. Pop psychology has a simplified view of the world where all empathy is good, with no limiting criteria. We are now in a feedback loop where anxiety is rewarded with empathy, incentivizing even more anxiety for more reward. We live in Calhoun's rat utopia.

​​@@theBear89451No, this video shows that women nowadays know that they have the right to have feelings and a lot of this accumulated stress is just due to the fact that, even now that we are in XXI century, a lot of guys, the minute they arrive home, they rest and women still need to do all the chores! Women come home tired, as well as men!

@@vervideosgiros1156 This video is about emotions/psychology, not the economics (who produces & who benefits) of marriage. As far as economics, women in the workforce peaked in the 1990s and late 1800s. East Africa has the most women working while the Middle East has the least.

@@theBear89451 "She" (Jimmy's character) is complaining about how tired she is... If both members of the couple divided the chores, probably women would be less tired... That's what I was talking about!

Seriously! My grandmother had to one up every time I express any struggle at all and when I say I need help she would just say well I had three kids and no help and leave it at that.

Checking happiness surveys along with medication and therapy usage, GenZ is the least happy.

Yep! How dare we have the audacity to want to make our lives better or even believe it's possible? Whaaat? Who said we get to do that? /sarcasm

My mother-in-law was great when the kids were little (/s): "I understand how challenging it is! For me it was even worse!" 🤦🏼‍♀️🤣

Which is pretty normal. Jealousy is very standard human behaviour (not saying it's good, just that it's to be expected sometimes).

how fucking ignorant of her.

There is nothing wrong with you! You're human and human means perfectly imperfect. You are doing a great job! Keep it up! You got this!! You're kids are so lucky to have you!! ❤

@@missdirectedawakening thanks for your kind words 🥰💖

You’re definitely not alone in feeling like this! I felt “cursed” my entire life because I was sure something was wrong with me. It wasn’t until this past year did I realize that’s not true, and I just grew up in a very dysfunctional, unhealthy, and abusive family that I viewed as “normal” until then. 😢 But you are a great mom, and wish more people especially our own families would realize that and validate it for us. I’m learning to validate myself with my therapist though as now I know my family probably won’t ever do that for me unless they get therapy themselves.

@@rbaid161 being raised in an environment like that ... its normal that you see it as the norm. Im proud of you for looking help and you are right sometimes its on us to seek for help and validate ourselves. 💕

No, hardly. A relationship is a kind of mutual agreement so your partner signed into it just as much as you, so at the very least your partner/SO should care are validate you (and work things out) The rest are hardly free choices. A job and a higher education are essentially requirements to people, and even if you go for an alternative the options aren't any easier. But having a kid? A completely unnecesary thing that a person did by their own choice (hopefully). No one asked them for it (definitely not their kid) nor would they have to do it for anyone. Unless they adopted, then they weren't doing anyone a favor. And what, did they really not know it wasn't some of the hardest and most onerous tasks they could take on? In that case that's more than stupidity, it's negligence. A proper comparison would be if someone chose to shoot themselves in the foot or handicap themselves in some way by their own free will and then complain that life is now hard and fishes for sympathy and validation. Or maybe if they shot _someone else_ and now took responsability by taking care of them.

​@@Tomyb15 😂 spot on

​@@Tomyb15no

You chose your job. If it's not fun, it is no one's fault but yours, get another job. But being a parent isn't a job you can toss aside ​@@Tomyb15

@Tomyb15 I think you missed my point, which is that anything worth doing is going to have hard aspects to it, and saying “you chose this” is just a way to invalidate that struggle. Even if you feel it is necessary, you still ultimately *choose* whether or not to go to college and what to major in. You choose what jobs to accept. You choose to engage in a relationship with someone. All those things have aspects that are hard, but it doesn’t mean they’re not rewarding or worthwhile, and throwing “you chose this” in someone’s face when they’re worn out or frustrated with something is never helpful.

That❤ i dont get how people become so bitter from their own experience that they want to make sure others are suffering as well

Exactly. Healing the world versus "revenge transference"

Yes 100%

But if they use compassion and empathy, how can they win their medal at the Suffering Olympics? (Pls note the heavy sarcasm here)

Good job momma. I have only 2. Not sure how you manage 5

I want the trend of having a governesses back haha

​@@Kelli-ru7yy only for the rich.

@@Rickettsia505 Well I was thinking about a non-profit, Baby sitters for single moms. But I don't think it should just be for single moms. We're getting high tech, so it would be cool if we had cams set up and parents could check in on their kids.

@@Kelli-ru7yy our culture/ govt/society doesn't demonstrate that it considers any work with children to be important. Teachers, nannies, daycare workers, are underpaid and not respected enough. Women who choose to stay home are not respected for their work, women who want time 2 with an infant after birth do not get paid enough for the time they take. Even pediatricians dont make as much as other specialties. Most of the time, women do the majority of the household chores, whether working or not. Stay at home parents don't get social security credit or disability, or respite care. I would love to see us flip that script, and support those that care for children monetarily and emotionally. They need better PR.

@@Rickettsia505 Well then be that change you desire. It's all we can do. Then hopefully it'll influence the people you hang around and then over time you can be a part of flipping the script.

He's a youtuber acting a sketch, not a mom 😅

"I work all day long too - way more hours than you do, in fact - for no pay and little acknowledgement or appreciation. And when you come home from the piddly 8 hours you had to work, you add to my mental load and expect me to take care of your needs and wants too. And then you wonder why I'm always depressed, angry and exhausted. Seriously, mister, get a clue."

​@@hydeparkacademy7107 the best lie men have ever spun into society is that we pretend working 8 hours in a cushy office job is somehow harder than being a full time parent.

​@fawnieee fr. Carpal tunnel vs burnout, illness, a possible murder charge, judgement from everyone, and so on

You have a roof over your head, food on the table, clothes on your back, household necessities, etc. You're getting paid. 🙄

​@@user-jv5pp8pv9lWho has these things? Cuz it ain't most mothers. You live in delulu land and I want in😂

Then tell them that? Maybe? Because I doubt they actually think that, that might just be a conclusion you came to on your own. If they actually do confirm that, maybe look for new friends :)

Some of us grew up with something close to that stereotype in the real world. It's not just a TV thing - characters like that parody real-world behaviors. That can make it hard to believe the complaints about how hard it is. When you've heard the same complaints about how hard the work is from someone that wasn't really doing it, it's a lot harder to believe them from someone that is. It can all just start to sound like exaggeration and whining.

@@JohnTyler-oh5rs You're right! I suppose every stereotype has a grain of truth. The idea had to come from somewhere, right? It's just unfortunate that people extend that impression to many stay-at-home moms that actually do the work. In fact, I don't currently know any stay-at-home moms (or dads) who fit the Peggy Bundy mold. They are all gettin' it done.

@@ShellsKnohl Indeed. There wouldn't be decades worth of history of female-targeted TV programming airing during the day, if there weren't large numbers of women sitting at home doing little to nothing productive during those times. Nobody pays to make TV shows for an audience they know doesn't exist.

That’s so true. We tend to be more involved and busy with the kids compared to the baby boomers generation who, a lot of them seemed to be like Peggy and just sending us kids outside to fend for ourselves while they watched their soaps. But we aren’t like that!!

I'm sorry to hear that. No one deserves their partner saying that. I hope he changes his way of seeing things

Being responsible for the lives and emotional health of other human beings is incredibly hard. It requires immense and constant inner work to make sure we don't dump unhealthy patterns from our childhood/society on the kids. Regulating oneself is hard enough, having to do that AND help a child learn to do that for themselves is a feat of epic proportions. Especially when it's expected you set aside all your own needs and are being constantly judged by everyone and given little to no support. I'm sorry your partner is jumping on the judging and failing to support bandwagon. You deserve so much better. They should be doing all that work too, since they also chose to be a parent. Then maybe they'd realize just how hard it really is and stop saying such stupid, hurtful things.

@@rainbowconnected parenting is only easy for shitty parents who don’t care about their children!

To your partner, "okay let's switch for a week and see how you do"

No offense, but your "partner" sounds like a complete asshole. Please leave them home with the baby all day Saturday or hell, all weekend, and see how "easy" it is for them to be a solo parent.

If you're a single parent, you've got two full-time jobs, the income-earning job and the childcare job. Hell, even if you've got a partner, there's still 24/7 childcare!

You're doing your best! Its okay to have low days and tough days! You got this momma!! ❤🎉

Absolutely

Most of these things are abt not treating women like garbage. It's great you learned but it's sad that this isn't commonly known

True, for me at least. I dislike children and I prefer to be as far away from them as I can. I made a choice to not have children to avoid the responsibility that comes with caring and protecting them. I'm quite clumsy and forgetful, I'm trying to be careful with whatever I'm doing but I always mess something up. Children are way too big risk to take, one moment you turn around and it's goings to fall and bump their heads on something and responsibility will be all on me. No thanks. I'm helping my sister by making her dinner, cleaning, eventually watching the child max 30 minutes, but I don't mind helping, just as long as my contact with the kid is as minimal as it can be. I just don't want to have the responsibility that I refused myself already by deciding to not have children.

I was a single mom for 26 years. Good emotional support is a blessing and my mother in law was a gem. It was still very hard, that’s the truth. But I’m now retired with an empty nest and I can tell you that the absolute BEST days of my life were raising my two boys. Nothing more fun or rewarding has ever happened to me.

Yes I have friends all the time talking about their baby fever and how they're so ready to be parents and I usually stop them in their tracks for a reality check (if they need it). My pregnancy was unexpected. We were NOT ready, and having my baby was the most wonderful but HARDEST thing I've done in my entire life, and I've been through a lot of messed up stuff. It's so important to be educated amd make sound decisions when it comes to becoming a parent. Make sure you're in a good spot in life and emotionally. Having a kid changes a person's entire life, but not a lot of people get that going into it because having kids is like a given in most cultures.

Amazing how no one ever tries to enforce this viewpoint on men because they know if they did, the man in question would likely just leave, because society is set up for that.

Facts,😂

Usually coming from the ones luring you in 😂

Great idea for a collaboration.

Yes!