I feel ya there

Be around real humans , not online

😂

Same lol

Beep boop beep boop

..... HAHAHAHAHAH

Hahaa, there's honesty.. The only sentence welcome is "what would you like to eat?"

The pageantry part really irks me sometimes. Why do I have to copy someone like a monkey to get them to like talking to me? I still don't really get it. That kinda thing just makes me think the person's a potential sycophant.

​@@matturner6890the reason the US at least has so many of the cultural and just blatantly corrupt behaviors and institutions we have is because we prioritize sociopathic and intelligent people who can do what you said, copy them like a monkey, and be likeable. It's why so many people have no actual useable knowledge or wisdom because they just pretend every second of every day

These videos lose me when they frame someone not enjoying social interaction or having a higher social battery with being shy, afraid, or just incompetent. No I just despise talking with strangers about nothing

Facts, fck these fooz

This is the way

I'm gonna die alone with my pets. Who cares.

My hobbies are way more giving, that other people are, anyway.

Don't allow red pill or self-improvement videos to overcomplicate your life. Starting a conversation shouldn't be complicated. I've been in your position back in middle and high school.

Yeah, really. That's why I came here, too.

Yup and telling someone that you don't wanna talk will often offend them, whereas being a boring person to talk to, is just way easier of an escape.

Telling someone you don't want to talk gives them a cue to start a conversation about it

​@Skelterbane69 sometimes people will still talk at you, whether you give them any responses or not

Almost as annoying as people that are too scared to just be direct.

Lmaooo

Yessssir

Lmao

*my fellow socially inept people, being bad at socializing is not always equivalent to being an introvert

@@takeuchi5760 I am seen 🥺☺️

Though they try.

Become a corporate jester

I had a drug test for a grocery store job years ago and wore a huge pot leaf t shirt in to give my pee sample. A sassy black nurse said “oh suga’ I hope yo pee dont come out too clear or you gonna be back in here for a repeat”. And we both just laughed.

LOL

​@@chrishouse7522You're saying that as though most of these places aren't already filled with clowns

That's a thing?

It's a thing

Has to be earned.

Very underrated

One word, one country: Japan.

Hi How are you? Hypothetically, if you could kill one person on the planet, who would it be and why?

-Hi -hi -HahahAHAHAHAHA

@@ark14700 google asking if I want this translated to English has me WEAK

​@@BunkerSquirrel it only adds an extra A to the hahas and removed the - ... Google's so impressive

Pay you to leave me alone ...

true but also kind of sad cuz it highlights the fact that some people have to be given enough attention in order for a relationship to work out. lmao. Pick your friends wisely.

This video is biased very much. Many people feel happy for someone else´s happiness, because it maintains peace in the world. Only sociopaths think other wise. They feel an inspiration from happy successful people. The author of this video thinks that everybody wants to manipulate and not being authentic and live in the moment.

I never would have thought of that. That’s so funny.

I see what you did there.

Great way to attract narcissists into your life.

Stuff is cool!

Yes, yes I do, what's your favorite stuff?

Stuff is good

Mm hmmm.

" Yea I like stuff" (laughs)

I mean you can use it as that by just doing the opposite of whatever he talked about

I honestly wanted a video to tell me what to do, to quickly be disliked. Guess I'll have to find another....

Just be yourself.

​@@Tomm192This would... Actually be amazing.

Are you and Tomm being stalked?? 😛

It's so annoying

Introverts can stand out, and even enjoy it, just not too much or too often. Saying this as an introvert.

ty chadcat

They have vids on how to stand out while still having a more quiet, subtle personality. Go watch them y'all, and stop complaining.

no.

Appreciated! :)

I always search for the answer key. Thank you for your service.

Yes

@@jasjas8232 And now I know what that's called. Thankyou.

#3 is very important to keep a conversation rolling longer

That’s highly underrated advice. Can’t expect things to go a certain way every time, gotta just move on and not worry about it

Sometimes it's the other person. Maybe they're shy, preoccupied with something, or just had a long day and is tired.

Also worth noting it isn't always necessary, you don't have to make every interaction with every coworker some extravagant affair. This is especially true for those you're around often, it is true for those you'll never see again as well but in that case you have an opportunity to improve everyone's day with a pleasant interaction so it's still worth the effort imo.

I can be charming as hell. Some days I can be boring as hell. It comes down to my own mood and energy levels. Alcohol helps

SAME.

I'm with you. I have no problems socially but I am coming to a point in my life where I'd see something pointless coming and I feel way more inclined to just dodge it.

Kindred spirit here. When i have to listen for 1000th time how someone’s football team should have played their most recent losing game, my eye glaze over and mind exits the room.

I have similar values as you, yet I also have come to learn to enjoy playful banter. Unfortunately the majority of people fail to appreciate the nuances of the world.

“Hey, are you working hard or hardly working!”

​@@johnp.johnson1541Everyone is judgemental, and everyone needs a sense of control in their life, sometimes we're able to make friendships or just be happy due to having similar/shared standards of judgement with someone

​@@johnp.johnson1541 No, he or she really doesn't.

True, when people say small talk is boring, its because youre not making it fun.

This is good advice. Everything is what you make it

Nothing to lose except a job.

Unless it is.

Unless it actually is your job. Welcome to sales.

@@JRay2113 yep

Even if it is not your job you shouldn't be opposed to entertain the people you want as friends and so on

​@@JRay2113weocome to networking, welcome to life

for me, it's the lack of charisma coupled with shyness. but i am getting better

Same here

Missed opportunities are life lessons if you allow yourself to view them that way. It's better you know now and learn from them (and this) 👍

Never too late friend!

Maybe anxiety 🧐

Still earth, still people. For sure there is an theatrical element that isn't there for most of us in real life but the tips still work

How tf would he give examples of people talking not on camera?

It's not a whole other world. I do this stuff without realizing and socialize just fine, like initiating conversation with an absurd answer.

That and these examples are talk show hosts who are literal pros at conversation and trying to keep conversations flowing plus practiced interviews.

I mean if you’re holding court with a few people it can be pretty similar

same this channel is so greattt

Good story!

As someone with tourettes this helps me as well. Titty sprinkles

@The CurvedPeen That's awesome! I'm also bad at math. Between this and Khan Academy, I can catch up to everyone else.

@@emmanollan3517 Maybe I will, thanks! :)

Same with russel brand, both of them together was total insanity

He's way better than those shills Kimmel and Colbert. Late night comedy is dead, it's just big pharma pushing propoganda.

Kimmel was funny back when he was working with Adam Carrolla. Those Karl Malone skits were hilarious.

Norm was great. Celebrity jeopardy as Burt Reynolds, and of course as Bob Dole. SNL fired him now they're a dumpster fire.

Yeah Craig is the best. He's the only night show host that ever made me actually laugh. Coco got a few chuckles out of me but Craig would have me guffawing uncontrollably. Very underrated.

Facts. If you did things you enjoy you would have energy talking about them with other people they would like you and you’d be friends. If you have no life you have nothing to say

can relate

Get off the internet and go make a life????????????

Sorry. Not pulling punches. Might be projecting. Sounds like the personality you present to everyone is boring and bland because you're too afraid of them not liking you and damaging your already fragile self esteem. And you think the secret to connecting with people and getting the validation you need is through cool stories and life experiences because that's what you subconsciously perceive as value. Of course, since you have absolutely nothing you perceive to be valuable, and you can't risk saying anything *not* valuable (because remember everyone has to like you), there is nothing left to say. In reality nobody gives a flying crap about what you've done, and the only time it matters is as support for something else you've said. So put the other person first. Ask questions, be interested in them. Offer your own opinion and be open. Openness invites openness. Thats how you get people to like you. Make them feel valuable and comfortable. When you get out of your own head and think of what the other person values, the problem will sort itself out. Of course, if youre not interested in people and would prefer to talk about what you wanna talk about, that's your own issue. Nobody else's.

What you've written is only half-true. If you only ask questions of other people and simply provide opinions, people will like you but they won't know you. People need to know you in order to build a relationship with you. You need to share things about yourself, too. And as I said, if all you do is stay home and browse KZfaq you're not really going to have anything to say or share. People need to get out of the house and start experiencing what life has to offer so they may share those experiences as part of building a relationship.

I think this is better advice than that given in the video. Quite simply, the more stuff you've done, the more you have to talk about.

This. exploring new stuff and doing what makes you fulfilled & being authentic is just, well, so FULFILLING wouldnt trade doing that stuff for the world

I do various hobbies but I don’t want to carry the conversation just talking about what I do.

Bro, you’re basically telling me to quit depression

Also stop hanging around people who do things that you don’t like (such as drugs/alcohol) just to be accepted.

Or, people who find themselves in social situations who are “energy ducking”, are not boring, but have other things on their mind, like they just lost their job and don’t want to share right now, are suffering from depression, or anxiety, but they brave enough to be out and about for distraction but didn’t want to get involved in conversation. Sometimes I go out and walk my dog and people sit next to me on the park bench to make conversation and I make a new friend, sometimes I just nod and smile.

Or; people who have grown up learning that people around them don’t appreciate their energy and thoughts, because it isn’t ‘appropriate’ for your perceived position in society. Fairly common in hierarchical cultures, as it is the far safer default to fit in. In that case you need to get the person in a more personal and non-social setting to see their real energy.

You didn’t have to come at us like that 😅

@@nurainiarsad7395 wow I've never seen a more spot on answer than that👏👏👏

@@Playboyy1985 of course this typical extrovert that never had self esteem and social anxiety issues would be ignorant what did you expect?

you are not an introvert because you never learned conversations, you are when you pull energy from beeing alone, stop abusing that term for your own convenience.

@@rail7646ayyy that’s a good point

@@rail7646that’s exactly the case most people here aren’t introverted they’re just antisocial because they lack the necessary experience to have the confidence to hold these conversations

@@rail7646 Since introverts socialize less, they have less opportunities to develop their social skills. He's not abusing that term and you're just attacking him for no reason.

Even if you are an introvert, that doesn't mean you should be unpleasant to be around. Make sure you understand what you can do better as you are now.

Same boat here, never thought I'd be this awkward, but I might just get better 😂

You may be feeling insecure but to be honest, most of the best conversations and laughs I've ever had were with people that sometimes deemed themselves insecure. Matter of fact is that "insecurity" often renders you very introspective, and once you open up, it's kind of a positive, fun, engaging pandora's box. Cheer up! You are great, use it to your advantage.

There's two kinds of learning. Conscious learning and subconscious learning. Most people think subconscious learning is like, listening to "how to speak Spanish" tapes while you sleep at night and waking up knowing how to speak Spanish. Which is actually a real thing. Not that you'll go to sleep not knowing how to speak Spanish, and then magically wake up being a fluent speaker. But more along the lines of, after you do that, when you go to Spanish class it won't feel completely foreign to you. You'll feel a sense of familiarity with the material. Learning new things are like solving a puzzle, and suddenly you'll be like "I know this piece goes here. I don't know why I know that, but that's where this puzzle piece goes." But subconscious learning isn't just about listening to learning material in your sleep. Subconscious learning actually happens all the time, at all times of the day, all throughout your life, morning noon and night. You spend all your time hanging out with negative people, you subconsciously learn to be negative and look at the world negatively. You spend all your time hanging out with motivated people, watching and listening to motivational material, you subconsciously start being more motivated. You wake up and even if you aren't motivated, you somehow know how to get motivated. Being motivated doesn't feel completely foreign to you, there's some sense of familiarity. If you keep binge watching videos like these, even if you just have them on in the background while you're doing homework, or doing dishes or folding laundry, and you keep putting yourself into social situations where you have opportunities to practice positive social habits, what will begin to happen is that having positive social interactions will start to feel familiar. You'll start complimenting people in authentic ways and being playful when you talk to them and feeling more relaxed in conversation without even realizing it. It will feel natural and unforced. It's all about taking something that isn't your comfort zone, and turning it into your comfort zone. It's like starting out feeling like the gym is the intimidating place you feel uncomfortable going to, and turning it into a place that feels like your second home. It doesn't happen because you consciously said one day "step one, I do this, step two I do that. step three, then this happens and then step four..." It's more like you are brainwashing yourself. You get brainwashed everyday whether you like it or not. You get brainwashed by how people treat you. You get brainwashed by the news. You get brainwashed by social media. The trick is to stop letting the world brainwash you how they see fit and to start brainwashing yourself as you see fit. Purposely make an effort to hang out with people you look up to and want to be like, their personality will start to rub off on you. Purposely seek out content online that you want to learn more about. Even if it's just background noise while you're doing chores. It WILL have a positive effect on you even if you don't realize it. You don't have to worry about memorizing every bullet point or looking at it as a step by step process. That's actually not necessary. People who sit around watching people beat each other up on worldstar hiphop all day may just think it's harmless entertainment, but what they're actually doing is subconsciously conditioning themselves to think that the world is a violent dangerous place full of horrible people. And without even trying they become more fearful and defensive around strangers. Swap those videos out with content like this and you'll be subconsciously conditioning yourself to think that conversating with people is a fun, relaxing, and enjoyable experience. And without even trying you'll become more charming and likable. All that "look in the mirror and tell yourself how confident and talented and happy you are every morning" stuff isn't actually just a bunch of motivational nonsense. It's actually one of many techniques for brainwashing yourself into having self confidence.

@@danielalejandro8045 Yooo!! Great comment! I was going to write this haha. Nice.

​@@TenthElementGraphics fabulous information. Thank you!

Right:)

What if your real self is just boring though?

@@msl1689Was gonna say that. What if people don't like me when I'm myself lol?

this is exactly how i am around people more shy than me

This!! Just last week I had a conversation with my unit mate who just moved into the apartment. She technically initiated it first, asking a simple question of “where can I hang these?” While holding up damp laundry, so I offered to let her borrow the dryer my sister and I had. There were five minutes to wait, and I didn’t want it to be filled with awkward silence, so I asked a bunch of questions and slowly learned a thing or two about her

This is a really good comment. Thank u for saying this

True, but I don’t see why it is so difficult for someone to elaborate on what others might call a yes or no question. I always try to help the other person out to avoid the awkward moment in the first place.

@@ChatGPT1111 people are lazy. At least I am, lol. If someone asks me a yes or no question, I usually answer simply, assuming they are small-talking. If they ask me an open ended question though, I assume they are genuinely interested and will give them a more quality answer.

@@massages_for_world_peace8909 ....a more quality answer? What does that mean? Genuinely curious

@@manher4335 I mean quality as in containing interesting details. Adding in something I’m passionate about or emoting more. Does that make sense?

@@massages_for_world_peace8909 Wouldn't a cut to the chase with the essential details method be more efficient?

Asked my budtender to smoke some day and she said she'll let me know whatever that means I guess she wants to know me better or something but Everytime I see her it's just how was your day I don't know what else to ask her

Maybe if you're a psycho introvert who doesn't know how to socialize with other humans

Asking this on a first date is a big red flag! I can see the potential to this question, I myself have asked it while drinking with friends, but I didn't ask because I had to keep the conversation going, I was literally curious. Also, I don't think it's a good idea to simply ask this with low levels of intimacy or anything.. the question itself has some trigger words for some people. Still, with great questions comes great responsibilities. "Amarite"? 😂

@@DimitriMoreira true I’m going to ask my friends this not because I wanna keep conversation but I’m actually curious cause this is an interesting question even if a stranger asked me this I’d be excited to answer it because just las week my life was in danger and it wasn’t the first time I can think of many stories but ik not everybody is the same and I wouldn’t ask a random person this question.

Although it is an interesting question, it is one I would NEVER ask. I think it is such a sensitive thing that I would wait for someone to volunteer it on their own once they felt close enough to me.

I started changing when I understood that it's selfish to "wait" for some extravert that would be interested in me , and start this funny conversation . I should be myself that one interesting person . And also I understood why although there such interesting people in my life wich I really liked, they left me very fast. Because they had all responsibility for the conversation and how it will go , or if it will begin in the first place. so yeah , I was the passive listener

See the preceding.

What other channels Aneesha?

I am being humble when I am telling you that I am the most powerful strongest coolest smartest most famous greatest funniest Y*uTub3r of all time! That's the reason I have multiple girlfriends and I show them off all the time! Bye bye fe

@@AxxLAfriku are you okay?

@@AxxLAfriku Not my style, but I love your energy.

This is very helpful, thanks

but what if I don't 100% believe in the Holocaust, aren't I supposed to explain why?

@@toobalkain Never talk about the holocaust on a date.

Not sure I'd put it as a hard rule, I guess it depends on the time of day, like you wouldn't want to open with it first in the morning but in the evening it's a great pick up line to say, have you been wondering why they wanted to shave them if they were going to kill them anyway?

@@toobalkain sure, if you want that person to know you’re 100% just some idiotic kook, then definitely, go right ahead

I find the vast majority of high school kids to be brain dead zombies - maybe they are just lacking these skills?

A mandatory class like that would be nice in every school. I would've definitely benefited from a class like that instead of slowly coming out of my shell through college and the following years. Might even make people feel less visible, less likely wanting to shoot up the school because they "don't fit in".

What a great idea!

I meant, might make people feel less "invisible", like being a part of something, less "alone". Because a lot of people feel like they're the "only one" going through something or feeling a certain way when in fact a lot of people feel the same way, not just you. But because nobody talks about it, you don't know.

Maybe let your students know that rarely, if ever, is anything on this channel sourced or annotated, whatever you want to call it. They can use it as an opportunity to compare things like tone and voice in material that has its research sources revealed, and material where someone sounds really certain they're correct.

Yep I did 3 years hard time at KFC and it was simultaneous the best and worst job I’ve ever had given the fact that I couldn’t speak on the phone to close friends or relatives at the point I was hired due to social anxiety. Safe to say I learnt a lot!

"You want mayonnaise or ketchup with your fries"

You came here to tell us how proud you are of that joke, and you know it 😂

@@simkesims6345 dammit, read me like a headline

@@twoohhunoh it was still a sensational joke

🤣😂😁 I’d like to work with you! ☺️

One on one convos is what I struggled the most with since starting my turnaround 5 months ago. In a one on one convo, you are more often forced to carry the convo, and the social techniques are different altogether. Coming from a background where I would physically shake when I tried talking in front of others, it wasn’t until recently that I could find easiness in one on one convos. I trust myself to follow through, and no matter what happens it’s all good. The person I’m talking to isn’t THAT important. If you are like me and don’t know what to talk about in any conversation, start living a more interesting life! Take pathways that you know will make interesting stories. And again- don’t take yourself too seriously, because people often want someone to listen to them!

Some people are just not worth talking to. If you find it draining, just stop.

I agree. As introvert all people arround me think they know me. And I'm automatically labeled in very short period as he's quiet, shy, doesn't talk much, he's a good lad, won't hurt a fly and so on. It's true I dont talk much and I accept that it's not who I am and will never try to become something I'm not just to fit in. So in parties it's easier for me and them to communicate because I can choose when to jump in and out of convo. To me trying/forcing the convo going is hell of a burden. And as people leave convo I notice the hype of the subject that we were talking about is slowly dying. In some cases they just ghost me and move to other chatting group. And I dont blame them, they THINK they know me and they don't know what to talk about when they're arround me. The reality is we are not like extroverts who fuel themselfts with talking, while I after work/party/meetings/friends etc. usually come home and freaking rest from all the activities. I just dont feel the need to waist my energy on someone who doesn't deserve it or try to maintain the level of conversational activity. Hell I give everybody a chance and if they want to slide away for no reason I'm just cool with it. I also respect and enjoy people who understand me, our conversation can be very interesting and long with awsome subjects also they know when I'm not talking they know I'm cool with it and together our souls are in chill mode communicating in silance, just our presence is enough to feel good. And together we can both strike back to convo at the same level of excitement when we took a brek and let our souls take from there.

I'm very much the opposite. I can be very charming in groups smaller than 5 or so people but as soon the group grows beyond that I begin to withdraw and only interact with the 1 or 2 people I am most comfortable and familiar with.

Cool

Lol

I am not actually sure you're joking...

@@FlamingManofIron Only God may know.

Are you sure? I would definitely lose count before 7000. Maybe you should check again? Currently waiting for the answer and will check back until I get it.

Popularity doesn't define you, right.. I was both nice and popular, but as I remember, I was lucky to have companions who truly cared about me, as I cared about them.. Popularity changes, and as you said, self abdorbed people with rude behaviour and selfish deeds may get popularity, but it isn't worth a life. So work for your success and help other people in a way.. 👍👍👍

I can relate! But I feel as if it has more to with energy than it does with manners. In my experience most of these self obsessed people are quite intense and can have a charismatic energy around them. They have the confidence to act that way, also towards new people, since they are so self centered. I myself am less confident and my energy also is lower because of this.

This is all generals charisma + energy skill set. Not what you said. They matter more

People don't want nice, not long term, not for a conversation, they want someone to be interesting and someone to be entertaining. Nice is boring because nice is predictable. Nice is inoffensive. If you passionately assert your opinions on what interests you and what you like even if it risks disagreement you'll be perceived as more interesting and more important. If you're being ignored in a conversation challenge someone's assertion "there's no way that happened, I can't believe that" or "Well it couldn't be entirely their fault could it have?" Always take the risk of making self deprecating jokes if you feel awkwardness or tension growing, but don't make that the only thing you do or you'll come off as insecure. As long as your delivery and tone is playful you'll be turning the conversation into a game, and games are fun. People aren't looking for you, you have to shove yourself in their faces.

You actually understand why they have “tons of friends”, it is because they have no standards. You said that many people who are “rude, don’t listen, arrogant, and seemingly dull” have tons of friends. Well, like attracts like, so their friends are exactly the same. You are picky and want friends who “actually act like they care about others”, so you don’t allow just anyone to be your friend. You have chosen to surround yourself with people with qualities you value, it is a good thing.

I’m workin on that, I’m a mom of 6 and I don’t see my buddies a lot. So when I see them. I would be so excited and I would just go in then Then catch myself, then ask them about themselves.

What helped me was to write down what was said in the video. Just typing up the 5 mistakes and remedies on my notes app and I was as able to remember it 100x better. Try it and see if it works :)

The examples are men, are these behaviors as successful for women?

@@yashvangalaimplementing it IRL requires practicing a lot, not just remembering

Same here brother. I've watched half a dozen of these video's and can never remember the exact lessons. Many of these behaviors come more naturally while having a few alcoholic beverages though. I'm naturally introverted but working in the service industry for years has forced me to practice a lot. At this point, half the town knows who I am. What's odd is, I have a really hard time being charming with strangers when there is no pretext for our interaction.

Lol no

@@whiteydiamond but I did though...

Lole that one time you fell in the toilet?

@@TheSultan1470 Lole????

@@najrenchelf2751 Exactly. Laughing out loud empathically. We've all been there.

Infj?

Thanks for sharing man! And good on you for getting help.

@@jjaybourne4734 thank you sir. I do feel like the end of this year is edgy for everyone and this whole world situation has messed with people's lives and freedom and whatever.. But I'm good I just want this year to end and have a spiritual fresh start. It's my boundaries I hadn't ever honoured for myself.. But yeah I'm good and hope u have a fantastic Christmas if its what u celebrate 🎄😊God bless you 🙏

@@P.willow ahh I appreciate it my man. Merry Christmas and I hope you achieve all you set out to and work towards in the new year.

@@jjaybourne4734 Thank you soo much. Merry Christmas to you and yours. I am actually really good. I can break things down and understand why I ended been hurt by something I've worked thru it and I'm back in work doing great and moving on not looking back in the past. Onward and upwards 😊🌟🎄

Nearly everyone I interact with only wants to talk about themselves. And they're not very interesting. I find it really tedious.

@@kelliepatrick519 Good that you're subbed to this channel then. Hopefully you pick up some tools in terms of guiding the conversation and being a conversation leader.

Naturally? Dang nice

That is a terrific way of starting an interesting conversation.Also,people who can't work because of disabilities,be it invisible disabilities like myself detest with a passion being asked"What do you do for a living a living?" when first meeting someone.It's like that is the only worthwhile aspect of being an adult.

Not everyone knows what their passion is or even has one

That is good. Although if someone asked me that, i woukd have no idea how to respond. 😂

Yeah, except try and find another word to substitute for 'passionate'. Severely overused these days, to cringe levels.

There is a difference between comfortable and boring. Not sure I can define it, but I know it when I see it. "Have you tried the club sandwich here?" or "I think I'll try the club. There is only so much damage anyone can do to a club sandwich." Very safe and comfortable topic, but the second way one bounces a little and the first just sort of splats and lays there.

Have confidence, many people rather rationalize saying they don't need it just to avoid it. I feel that you're in good direction! Good luck!!!

@@xlimitx0725 thank you!

I suffer from depression and going to work every day is a struggle, let alone trying to be a social person while there. I hear coworkers easily talking and laughing and it really makes me feel low.

For example, I wondered why it is no one wants to seem to get to know me and its because I make mistake #3 literally every time I’m asked something about myself.

I still have no idea what an awkward silence is, I like it quiet.

i hate how its so hard, like im a questions person and ofton ONLY way to know to make conversation is question question question question. small talk is like "a waste of brath" i ALLREADY KNOW its raining outside dawg!

@@NightmareRex6 Small talk is rarely the goal itself, but rather a way to naturally segue into more substantive conversation topics. Having some immediate shared experience to open up with makes it easy, particularly with strangers.

As a girl, this is super accurate. Here's my tips off the top of my head: -leading a girl through a crowd or busy restaurant by placing a hand on her back or holding her hand. Don't make her lead -stick up for her. If someone is rude to her in public. Don't just stand by awkwardly. Either escort her away from the situation and verbally tell her that the person was rude or tell the person that they have no business talking to a lady like that. -do not laugh at her. If she embarrasses herself, brush it off and assure her it's no big deal. If you do something that accidentally embarrasses her (like my bf tripped me in public once), apologize. -be confident and a leader in social interactions. If you're insecure in public, she won't feel safe and secure with you. -most gentlemanly rules apply like opening doors, walking on the street side of the sidewalk, etc.

Always keep one hand on the back of a girl's head. It makes her feel safe. Always keep your other hand on a thing of mace or a knife (hidden in your pocket) so as to protect your girl.

but Charlie had made a video about this . There were things like "give the girl always room to "escape" like physically , take always the seat near to the wall ,

As a woman, if she doesn't feel safe with you, it's probably not you, it's her and she needs to visit her therapist because assuming that the dude you've elected to go out on a date with wants to hurt you is a her problem, not a you problem. Also, why would you need to ask this is you're NOT dangerous? Don't make women's insecurity, YOUR insecurity. 🙄

I realize my prior comment was crass, even though it is quite true. So rhetorically speaking if you want a girl to feel comfortable on a date with you, make your dates daytime events with plenty of people present in the general vicinity and once she suggests something more private and at a different time, then generally, it means she's comfortable enough with you to be alone. On a more serious note, you don't want to make a woman's insecurities your own because they will smell that like blood in the water and lose interest in you quickly. While they'll appreciate your empathy, they won't take kindly to you walking on eggshells FOR them. Lead confidently. That being said, women tend to confuse confidence with arrogance and assume it with the later. YOU, on the other hand KNOW your motivations. If the woman has difficulty understanding your motivations after you've given her ample reasons to accept your decisions, drop her like it's hot. She will not be there for you when YOU NEED HER THE MOST. A woman like that will kick you while you're down and has no interest in the relationship growing simply for the sake of having that security that she desperately looks for in another. Run, the moment she says she is a feminist. They are ideologically driven and will not give YOU, their partner the benefit of the doubt at all. Sorry if I came across as horrible, but I am tired of seeing good men assume the position of the monster because they want to be better for women who haven't proven they themselves are even worth the title. I've seen it so many times. And I have many friends who are constantly complaining about how all the good men are taken, and why they can't be married like I am. They have more issues than they know how to deal with and men shouldn't lower themselves to make them feel better. Instead, they should rise to the occasions by showing them the issue, suggest a few fixes and let them decide how they will deal with it. This is how I got married. My husband and I were on and off because I "didn't know what I wanted" and the day he finally said, "if you walk out that door, it'll be the last time because I can't keep letting you do this to me" was when I realized the problem was with me and that I was hurting him. Don't sell yourself short.