🧠🧠 finish listening to ALL the stories here kzfaq.info/sun/PL5FcevqxOz5tuU1qghkOUcBqGKHKXHO0f instagram - @amithejerk twitter - @amithejerk

Our four year old son was riding his bike, which had the brake by pedling backwards option. Tiny little bike, still had stabilizers. My son slipped and got his leg trapped between the pedel and frame. Because of the jamming caused by the braking option, we couldn't get the pedal past his leg. Nothing we did got him out. We eventually call 999 (UK emergency services). Fire brigade arrive soon after, with an ambulance behind them, because a child was involved. I don't know what the bike was made of, but they had to use the jaws of life to get his leg free. A few tears, a bruised leg and a little knitted fireman, soon had my son feeling great.

He threw the extinguisher into the fire!?!? 😅

The company behind the fireworks in that last story sounds breathtakingly incompetent.

I was a fire fighter for 30 years. at the beginning of my service, a fellow fighter that was younger than Me was painting and got oil based paint on His hands. He goes into the truck cabinet and proceeds to take a rag and dipping it in Gasoline to wash his hands. At the same Time He was smoking a cigarette. I immediately told Him to stop what He was doing. He started to argue with Me and I told Him I was going to knock Him out if He did not put down the gasoline. He explained to Me that it would be very hard for the Gas to catch on fire with the distance of the cigarette in His mouth, My final answer was, If you want to light yourself on fire fine, But dont do it in front of Me.

Something similar to story 8 actually ended up happening near me, except the guy used dynamite and since there were no continuous flames down the hole he just kept doing it in hopes of killing gophers. Our neighborhood complained about the noise for years, but no one could make him stop. I’d assumed that story was one of a kind because no one else would be crazy enough to do it, but apparently I was wrong.

How much you want to bet that the employee that was choosing between a fire and his report was actually fired for not having the report ready by 3:00 PM?

#17 reminds me of a story i read somewhere: a guy called tech support: guy: "the printer isn't working." tech: "wants the problem?" guy: "oh, it's on fire." tech: "call the fire department!" guy: "no, fix it ,so i don't have to use a different printer ten feet farther away from my desk." tech: "CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT!" guy: "you'd better hurry up and fix it, the flames are shooting 6 feet in the air." tech: " *CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT* !" ...and it just went on and ON like that!

And this is why when I drive there is the rule that the car doesn't move a milimetre without everyone wearing a seatbelt.

My father is a firefighter, so we naturally ask him what happened whilst he was at work. I intentionally don’t ask him about car wrecks because they can get gnarly.

If "accidently crushing your son to death under your own body weight after a car accident" isn't a good reason to lose weight, I don't know what is.

Had one a few years - one road in town near the river was flooded and impassable A saw horse had been placed across the road to block it, so we thought. we get a call about a man trapped in flood waters. Arriving on scene find this clown on the roof of car calling for help We launch our boat and get him off the car - after asking him why he was driving down a flooded street His response was "The GPS told me to turn down this street" When asked why he didnt stop said "Well thought the GPS knew what to do" The police chief heard about this idiot and told the police on scene "I want this guy charged with disregarding a street closure" He then yells "wait I be right there and do this myself ...."

I am glad the Gopher got revenge. RIP little one.

My brother would regularly refuse to buckle up. My dad's go to was, "what was the last thing to go through [person sitting in the seat in front of brother]? Brother."

As a fellow North Carolinian, I can honestly say that the farmer who refused to evacuate himself and his family is stubborn to a fault. Some folks here are so damn stubborn that they risk their own health and safety, my late Mama and Gigi being among them. It took me begging & pleading for Gigi to relent and go to the hospital, but it was too late. She died within a week.

The Gopher story at 4:00 is probably one of the most funniest ones I’ve heard

I bow to that gopher. ETA: and Little Joe. ETA2: and the penguin.

Dang the first one was just straight up shocking The second one was straight up dumb

I love how casual they were about being in a burung building. Honestly I would just say "Yea hold on I'm getting a network disconnected error, that's something something your it people need to fix, but I'm sure your boss would accept the report late, grab a USB, copy the file too it, eject and take it with you, if you can't just unplug the laptop or computer and take it. My job expects me to die if we get robbed. I'm paid minumum wage. If some dude comes in with a gun I'm just gonna hand em my drawer and go sit in the back with my 3ds

a senior executive where I work was giving us a safety talk. He wanted people to think about the dangers in what they do. He told the story of His wealthy brother that was a surgeon, and He had a huge pile of waste lawn items like branches and dead plants etc. that accumulated over the years on his beach front property. After pouring pouring gasoline on the pile He took a lighter to lit it. He did not realize the Gasoline vapor cloud had surrounded Him. After the explosion He caught on fire and died from the burns.

7:00 "I was a Navy 'Corpse'man" - sounds like this story is going to take a dark turn...

The gopher story got me. The gopher's revenge

That was one fiery gopher

The eggplant story is so outrageous and unbelievabley stupid that anyone would even try that that it has to be totally true.

10:31 But the biggest telltale mark of all is the bruise that the seatbelt leaves on your body.

I’ve got a good one when I lived in New Zealand I was at a water park called splash planet there was a fat kid trying to get food out of the vending machine by sticking his arm inside and he got stuck the fire crew had to saw the hole thing apart while he was crying to his parents on the floor looking like the machine was eating him

For #17, it could have been the printer itself that caught fire, thus why it was returning an error in the printing request. Maybe the employee start the fire without knowing it and the boss didn't fired them for that but because the paper where burned before 3 PM.

12:52 handeled better than harambe

The woman seeking attention - anywhere civilised she would have got a bill so high she would not complain for a lack of attention from debt collectors for *years* .

During hurricane ida my Chief was on a highway with my engine company ( this was before I joined ) helping people out of their cars this guy completely goes around the fire engine after repeatedly being told to stop. And gets his car stuck my Chief then proceeds to tell him to “ stay in your vehicle we will come to you” the guy in his utmost stupidity GETS OUT OF HIS CAR and gets dragged down the highway by the raging rapids the highway turned into popping up at least 2-4 cars down. When questioned as to why the guy didn’t stop he said this “ I didn’t see the truck “ let me repeat this guy did not see the BIG AS RED FIRE TRUCK WITH FLASH BLUE AND RED LIGHTS

There was this guy who lived in a nursing home my friend was at. They were both neighbors because he lived in the next door room from her at the time before he left. He had gone and dumped a glass of water all over the floor in his room and proceeded to sit in it like he slipped in the water and fell. Then, when he thought that worked, he got moved out and proceeded to sue the home for damages or whatnot. He done it before so I think it didn't work that time and had to leave and asked not to return after that. A couple Thanksgivings later we saw him at a local Dennys and he got himself a girlfriend and was planning to move to Thailand with her and they both were on disability pension or whatever, but they didn't have much of any money to make that kind of move. To this day I still have no idea why he thought it would be okay to do something like that. My friend seen people on dirt bikes and such also decapitated where she grew up because they thought it would be cool to go and ride like that out in a car. Also she saw an empty casket fly out the back of a hearse as well

I did what the girl in story 11 did so many times as a child and as a teen, I don't think it's that unique of an experience, I've seen many of my friends do it too. None of us got stuck stuck tho, sometimes it was difficult to get out, but we never got call emergency services stuck.

The gopher in the eighth story sounds like one metal gopher! Sad that his death had to be so painful...

7:04 reminded me of this Facebook post someone said they want to date this firefighter so they burn their house down to get his attention but instead they left with only 2 kids instead of 4

Apparently there's a town in Australia somewhere where they no longer have a pub, apparently it started burning and everyone went outside to watch but everyone forgot to call the fire department so it completely burnt down.

17:35 Terrific line.

No way im from Eastern NC! I remember that hurricane it was unreal. I was just a kid but my god it was savage. The water came up so far I couldn't even get out to the main Rd from my house out in no where Blounts Creek NC. So many of us was stuck for almost a week before anybody could get off our little Ln.

In the early 2000's in the UK there was a seatbelt advert that said "today I killed my mum and then I sat down" followed by a slow motion minor car crash. I can't be in a car with someone not wearing a seatbelt.

The last one hit me I was dying at the stupidity😂

I just did an Internet search on the gorilla escape story. It's not only true, but this year marks the 20th anniversary of that whole fiasco. Yikes!!! 😧😧😧

In the early 1990's I was a firefighter with a small volunteer fire department in a rural mountain town in Tennessee. One Sunday morning we was called out on a house fire. We found the owner in the yard with 1st and 2nd degree burns on his arms. To make a long story short, he was drunk, passed out in bed with a lit cigarette. He came to and remembered his six pack of beer under the bed. He was saving it. Only in Northeast Tennessee. 😅

10:23 literally my husband and I talked about this and how the belt buckles during crashes and if you go a certain speed etc.... brooooooooo that's hoooooorrid who could live with themselves after that I hope he gets therapy, wears a seatbelt, and possibly lose some weight... that poor kid

So, story 12... yeah, no set belts do sometimes come off in an accident. At least the 3 point safety belts do. I personally had my seat belt come off and slap me in the face in my first accident caused by poor weather conditions and a deer. Rolled the little bug nearly 2,000 feet. By the time anyone came up to the accident I was already out of my car sitting on the side of the road. The seat belt was already able to move and had slack in it. State troop said I was lying, thank God for the inwards facing dash cam clearly showing I had my safety belt on till the second out of 10 rolls..

This video should be called "Are they an idiot?" Because these stories are mainly about idiots

The Sun Tzu of Gophers lmao

Little Joe escaped in 2003, the movie madagascar came out in 2005

the gopher story is super hillarious.

4:56 that's sooooooo sad 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 poor gopher

The no-seatbelt thing is a real mess, people die in easily survivable accidents. Have seen my fair share of mangled bodies with broken necks

The gorilla one tho 💀💀 how did bro even get a gorilla?!

Unfun fact: When a building’s fire alarm system gets triggered, we cannot switch the sirens off until either a false alarm has been confirmed or the fire is out. Reason being that if we arrive to an evacuated building and turn off the siren, people will assume the situation is resolved and return to the building. Suddenly you have a bunch of people loose on the scene and have no effing clue whether all occupants are present and accounted for. Also: If you have been evacuated and suddenly remember you need to take some critical medicine at a certain time: flag down one of the firefighters or medics and inform them. Do NOT walk back in. That smoke is no joke. It’s not like your camp fire smoke that makes your eyes water a little. One lung full of the smoke of a structure fire can be enough to make sure you will never have to worry again about taking your medication on time. There have been cases where people have literally walked back into a smoke filled building who protested loudly when they got basically picked up off their feet and dragged back out.

I can see how some firefighters would have drenshed the pie in water in the sink after removal just to be petty. Can't rist that thing to have enough residual heat to ignite! In addition I would have flipped the circuit breaker for the kitchen without telling this lady. Just to have her pay for an electrician to solve the mysterious loss of power. I think that she wouldn't even bother to do the user level troubleshooting step of checking her breakers by herself. I could also see them eating the pie...

I feel sorry for those four kids.

3:53 The gopher story.

7:11 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 why would you do that?! That’s like me sticking my tongue in a metal door and slamming it! 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

Freakin hell, I love this Title. Lmao 🤣

Ok, can we take a moment to observe that in that last story they called the bomb squad because a firework barge (a barge full of bombs) was on fire... and the bomb squad _the friggin bomb squad_ was like "nu-uh, no can do m8, we'll be there tomorrow tho" *there's a pile of bombs on fire gtf over here!*

I love the huge difference between 11 and 12 11- "I watched a fat man realize he crushed his son because he wasn't wearing a seatbelt man" *drags cigarette* 12- "Old dude's balls got caught in a shower chair lol"

Guy probably once/twice a year would call. He didn’t have heating or ventilation & would burn stuff to warm up & be alarmed there was smoke.

8:43 would you believe that one of my friends has done the same thing except the fire department didn’t need to be called

Story 11: I have gotten in the same situation when I was 7, I got stuck in the baby swing while my grandma was babysitting me. This lead to my grandma 4 years later not letting my cousin get in those swings because of what happened to me. Your welcome Nicholas

I hope the needs-attention woman eventually really needed help, and didn't get it. I hope karma hit that waste of oxygen HARD.

"animal controla and the SWAT team worked together to take down little joe" is a sentace i never thougt id hear

He got the gopher, I'd say thats a win.

I’m from Boston living in Dorchester that is a crazy story!!!

Why was the little Joe story on this list, that wasn’t dumb, in fact that like one of the best stories I’ve ever heard lol

on story #10, Of course it was a Marine😂😂😂

8:45 isnt there tiktok video of this

The poor gofer:(

Imagine killing your own son because you didn't want to wear a seatbelt.

What the fuck was #8 🤣

#13 reminds me of a Dresden FIles comic book, "welcome to the jungle", where an 800 pound gorilla known as "Moe" had been effectively framed for killing someone. spoiler warning: Harry cleverly arranged for the gorilla to kill the real monster at the end!

Story #8 is so funny

Start hitting the woman in #9 with heavy fines.

Number 9 sounds like a good case for justified light police brutality.

So at 6:47 you just straight up say a certain date from ‘01

Story 8 is some family guy stuff

The first one😂😂😂😂

Gopher Rambo got revenge loony toons style

Okay, for the last story, somebody should've commandered the coast guard boat, call the folks on the boat some choice words, and gotten close enough to the barge to be able to engage the fire with the water cannon.

WHY WOULD HE BURN THE GOPHER?!

7:00 14:25

4:06 VIETNAMMMM!!!

Spencer Shay. He’s still starting fires… . Ugh! 😑

Not so little.

Im not a firefighter but..................................

These are addictive. I need help.

Okay the pie lady.. at least she had some forethought of trying to prevent a fire? But also.. you don't leave a fucking stove unattended

Men be like 7:55

Hi.😊

6:46 Please don't call them 9/11 operators.

Jeezus H Christ, that last one is a crapshow. Also, you should say somewhere what the game in the background is; really distracting not knowing what it is.

3:54 Press X for doubt. This story is half of the plot of the comedy movie Cadyshack from 1980 where bill murray is trying to catch a gopher ruining the golf field and eventually he tries to blow it up with dynamite. guess what... the gopher survives. seriously doubt this ever happened

first

102th

Spam

10th And this is why Men die earlier then women. Things like this.