Poggg

I would absolutely love to but I don't live in North America 😿

@Prestin Hurshberry Pretty sure slaves wear chains and get whipped, stoned, and hanged. Seems vastly different but who knows.

"Tonight, I will be sleeping with one eye open." 😆🤣😆🤣

And then you spray him with perfume. You have no fucking idea how cats hate that.

MRAAmrrrwww.

"shut up"

😭😭🤣🤣😭

Lolol you could hear her laughing at that part too

I watched that 12 times 😂😂😂♥️

That's when I lost it! LOL.

😂🤣😂😂😂😂😂

I lost it when she said “Somebody ordered an extra spicy Mayo” 🤣😂🤣😂

I feel that cats pain lol

This cat owner belongs in prison. Did you say cologne!? You should be forbidden to own a cat for all times, seriously!!!!

hahahhh lol

Mayo: a pox upon you, foooooooool

🤣😂🤣

Best comment ever!

Mayo's like, "I hate you, I hate you, I hate you! You're gonna pay for this!" to the vet.

I lost it too 😂😂

here the spicy MRMRMRMNMMGH 0:59

Right? He's just coming up with more punishments

Most unhappy cat in a happy hoody award goes to…..🥇 🐱

Lol

Why is it called a happy hoodie? None of them look happy to be in it!

@@orionthecat2600 It is the Bonnet of Discontent.

I shave his sanitary areas? I think she means unsanitary areas. How could you get that wrong?

As she slowly chokes the cat.

@@-HighTide honey, no. “sanitary areas” means his anus and penis. she shaved his ass and groin to prevent pee and shit from sticking to his fur/skin. have you ever heard the term “sanitary pad” before? “sanitary” is used to talk about the front and/or rear (ie. areas that need extra hygiene attention lol).

Its over mayo i have the high ground Mayo: you underestimate my power

@@unitedfederalrepublicoffur7849 😂😂

clearly :D

I just said clearly right before reading this​@@ragevsraid7703

correction three moods you forgot:Both at the same time with the murderous gaze of a killer.

@@egodragonvm663 Crap! Thanks for reminding me!

Oh my God, Mayo and I are the same person.

This is my new favourite comment on the internet hahahahaha

So basically a moody teenager.

Mayo woke up and chose ANGY

Good...goooooooood

So did I

Go Mayo

Hes just spicy mayo today

*his

Not all. All of my cats were given people names. I especially miss my sweet boys, George and Harvey. 🙂

@@donnabradley5699 My cat's official name was Thomas (for very formal occasions). On an everyday basis I went with the more casual 'Mr Big&White'

@@francesbell9465 How has no one made the plethora of obvious jokes yet...

My brown-furred cat is named Brad, but his actual name is Bread (cuz he looked like a loaf of bread). I find the fact that most cat owners in the world inherently _gave up_ on naming their cats properly quite funny.

I had a grade school friend who had a dog named oreo.

As a man who owns a long haired domestic, she's the sweetest thing... Right up until I have to groom her. Yeah, you HAVE to trim the hair around the butt for sanitary reasons. It's not pleasant for the cat or you to have cat dingle-berries hanging out. It's not safe, it's gross, and the cat will be happier for it. I wonder if they ever heard of "Cat scratch fever" you can get a infection from a cat scratch due to the shit left on the under-side of their claws. Due to the cat poo left there after a litter box use.

Nature didn't make long haired cats that require frequent grooming, humans did. Without human intervention long haired cat's fur will mat and cause cat suffering.

@manditheos That statement does not make sense, and the addition of a “Fuck you” doesn’t really improve its weight/significance either. I don’t know if you’ve had a bad day, if so, I hope it’s better. They don’t exist for the sole reason for us humans to go “awww a cat” but they do provide us with convenience. Humans weren’t made by nature for the convenience of our gut bacteria which helps us process food and they weren’t made for our convenience either. Yet, we work to ensure that the other stays alive. I know it isn’t the exact same for cats, we won’t die if we’re separated, but they accepted to live with us and we accepted to live when them because we both benefit from each other. We began to domesticate cats since ancient Egypt, or at least that’s what historical evidence suggests. Farming attracts mice, cats come to eat the mice, we observed and decided to live with them since they get food and our crops are saved. We’ve been in a facultative mutualistic relationship since then. Yeah, it’s a bit different nowadays but it is important for us to keep them healthy since they keep us (people who own cats) emotionally healthy. They accept to be our convenience and we accept to be theirs

What on earth is this comment section? I'm sorry, Angela, Gator, and all those who are witnessing bullshit. I can't even begin to explain a cent, so I'll leave it to those who are willing to put in the time and sanity to refute misinformation.

@manditheos who hurt you?

🤣🤣❤️

Lol 😂😂

Buzz buzz hair stealer🏅

😂😂😂

Windy screamer 😂

My cat had an episode of diarrhea in his carrier which coated him head to toe like a marinade. He was so shocked and humiliated that he was being washed that he just sat there in silence. 💀💀💀

@@JD.727 Oh, poor boy!

Yep I wouldn’t dare do this to my cat and he reallly needs His butt cleaned and he’s like the sweetest cat ever but is not into “against his will” like he will sit nice and let me trim his nails and then he gets his chicken churu tube treat but soap and any more water than what he enjoys playing in with his paws and face I would probably end up armless lol he’s never bit Or scratched me before but he did royally freak out and jump off my chest super hard when I hugged him a second longer than he wanted me to .

@@Ginger_Sweet OMG The chicken churu!! It's the only way I get my cat to do things he doesn't want to do, like have his nails clipped. He loves that stuff, especially that vomit-smelling "chicken and cheese recipe"!

Truth. We all know how cats can go from I love you to I will haunt you in your dreams. In like 2 seconds

:D I'm going to be laughing at your quote all day because it's true. Mayo looked like he was ready to curse all of our houses. :D

The happy Hoodie is my favorite part haha

😂😂😂😂

As she would ask the cat “are you happy now?”

See, you misunderstood, the hoodie makes the *groomer* happy, not the cat lol

"YOU SHAVED ME BALD LAST TIME, OF COURSE I'M MAD!"

I imagine Mayonnaise saying that with a tough man's voice

"your life is forfeit" is that by chance a critical role reference? lol

Is that a Lord Percival Fredrickstein von Musel Klossowski de Rolo III reference?

Critters love critters

The Phantom Mayo

Yesssssss

🤣🤣 Mayo strikes back!

Grooming Part 2: Electric Boogaloo

"I woke this morning to the smell of cat piss on my pillow."

Mayonnaisegrab: ONE MILLION YEARS DUNGEON

*Unholy Lemonyase screaming*

AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH 😡 🍋 😡 🍋 😡

I got to this comment as she said she would be sleeping with one eye open and now im imagining lemonmayo watching her like LG watches the candy people sleeping XD

These comments are 😂😂😂

The way he plops down i 😩🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😅💀

"You dramatic condiment"

*”You dramatic condiment”*

Best yet a dramatic condiment I can't

I laughed so hard when I saw that

🤣🤣🤣

Even worse if you are allergic to cats 😂

He didn’t bite... i would count that as a win.

how is she not wearing sleeves!!?

😂😂😂😂

"you're lucky I don't live here or I'd poop in your bed" vibes?

Oh-

Do we need to place Vanessa on a witness protection program or something?

I give my cat a bath once. He tried getting out of the tub and just kept yelling. I get done, dry him, and release a angry cat into the house. He was mad at me for the rest of the day after that.

@@worst-casescenario6873 most likely

😭❤️

OMG it’s so true! Trust me I have the scars to prove I forgot!!!

@@melissailene7361 me too...lol

I think I m going to de weaponize my both 🐈cats but sometimes I think they need their claws when I open the window and they play around!

Tonight I will be sleeping with one eye open... that part was also funny 😂

@@nakedfreak1 It’s not akin to torture. It just irritates them.

Deep down he was loving every minute of it, but had to keep up appearances so the guys down the alley tonight don't give him any crap about it.

@@nakedfreak1 it’s not ‘akin to torture’ don’t be so dramatic

@@nakedfreak1 you're being ridiculous, a lot of cats have no problem when water and it certainly isn't torture even if they don't...

@@nakedfreak1 Karen

I think that happy hoodie is defective because that is not a happy kitty

LOL

This cat owner belongs in prison. Did you say cologne!? You should be forbidden to own a cat for all times, seriously!!!!

@@marriechrissievalley4650 pet cologne is not the same as human cologne. It is safe for them.

@@marriechrissievalley4650 Belongs in prison because she put pet cologne on the cat. Ok Karen.

"It's over, Mayo! I have the high ground!"

He was just trying to accept his fate lol

@@garrettord3304 Mayo: "You underestimate my anger!"

@@andreashansen5313 *Burns in water*

Mayo is male.

🤣🤣

😂😂💀

😂

I read it with Mayo's voice mocking her narration

🤣😂

@@EnnieRocks in a previous video she said Mayonnaise does not groom himself or allow his owners to brush him. Hence why he had to be shaved due to matting. Based in her previous video, he tolerates grooming pretty well normally.

@@EnnieRocks no it not. also in case you didn't hear she said he had severely matted hair that need to be shaved

@@simpesompe1308 sometimes they stink lmao

@@EnnieRocks Allowing your cat to live with matted fur and have dried up dingle berries tangled in their fur is abuse. When my cat somehow shit up his back should I have just left it there?. You need to get your thinking process in order if you think giving a cat a bath is abuse.

I think it’s all the swearing. Some of these dogs and cats have a real mouth on them. 0:18

🤣🤣

Underrated comment

True that! 😂

Ok so you made me laugh hard today

"MAYONNAISE!!! MAYONNAISE!! NO!! GET BACK HERE MAYONNAISE!!"

_"Cats are clean animals they groom themselves they don't need bathing"._ - "Wannabe animal rights activist" My god is that annoying. Those kind of people love pretend like they know everything.

Don't forget about sphinx

@@ToveriJuri those people don't consider that animals can have heath problems, just like us, and aren't all able to properly groom themselves. And the smushed faces of course lol

They don't care about being right as much as they care about fighting something.

Exactly. My one cat is special-needs and can't figure out how to properly groom himself. We SHOULD be taking him to groom more often. And BTW I AM an animal rights person. But some animals have disabilities just like we do and they need help. We dont know why this cat needs help grooming.

I came to say the exact same thing! If GWTD thinks this is an angry, aggressive cat, I hope she never, ever actually meets one. Mayo, even in this video, never gets much beyond mildly annoyed.

@@HalfShelli Coming from yet another vet nurse: in fairness, anything worse probably gets toted off to the clinic for some night-night juice, which is as it should be. Too much risk of unfortunate accidents (to both cat *and* human). It takes a very tolerant cat to even get groomed while awake in the first place. I, for one, hope that Mayo is as spicy a kitty as she ever has to deal with.

Is squishing the cat the best way to stop it struggling?

@@ejkalegal3145 Depends on what you're trying to do! Squishing the cat is a very useful tactic in the vet office, but doesn't always work for groomers just because of what they specifically need to do to the cat :)

I KNOW RIGHT? my vet can’t even touch my cat even tho she SHE KNOWS it’s all fake drama (no elevated heart rate but acting like death) you can’t trust it bc he’s CAPABLE

Yes

There is no way she is 4'10

@@meis7218 even I feel the same

The CAT IS 4'10"?!?!?

@@meis7218 yea she is, she commented it on the vid where she grooms a rare colored german shepherd

DUN DUN DUN

The Dark Mayo Rises

Begun, the Mayo War has...

Mayo 3, in 3D.....

love these comments

For awhile I was afraid people would think I was cutting because my cats kept getting me on the wrists.

I want to be the cat and choose violence 😂

its nothing but quicktime events under a timer, and you always can't get it all done

Cat Groomer Simulator 2022 would be a big seller on Steam.

100% would play

For real, I'd be like "Am I a joke to you?!!! Look at me face!! Do I look like a fking Mayonnaise to you??!! I'm not even white!!!"

Like Richard Gere in officer and a gentleman Mayo nnaise

That's what my boss calls me because I'm always eating mayo lol.

😝😝😝😝😝😝😝😝

"Look at me; I am more like salt n pepa"

He's like "you better sleep with one eye open.

This joke is extremely DADDED!

@@ashiqkhan4718 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂

Lol that's exactly what i did hear

It was tho

more like a prequel too an upcoming death experience

She was… believe me😩‼️

I can't wait to hear this. I'm hospitalized right now and I forgot my earphones and I can't have the speaker on! Still enjoyed the video though! I saw no revenge going on here at all, in fact I thought this cat was extremely patient! Interesting profile name indeed - the 776 really makes it stand out! 😁

@@georgehenderson7783 Aside from the cat situation? I’m sending you good healing vibes and success for whatever reason you’re in hospital🙏🏻. Hope a kind person will bring you earphones! 🤗✌🏾♥️‼️

Mayo is a very well behaved cat too, I've had to bathe cats when they got extremely messy (mostly kittens in their food) but there are times I still end up covered in scratches

100.

@@LumaEclipse when I got my kitten, I had to bathe her to get rid of fleas. She scratched me good twice, and continuously tried to bite me the entire time even though I had her scruffed. She peed and scrambled all around my bathtub. It was very stressful for the both of us

Yep. I wonder if these people even have had cats before. We had one who HATED flea medicine and the only way to get it on him was to hold him down. It was either that or let him be eaten alive by fleas.

Yes. I had to take my long hair to be groomed once (so far) and the groomer had me help hold him so he could not get away. Fortunately I did not get him bathed that day, but it is hard trying to hold a squirmy cat still so it can get various parts shaved and trimmed and be combed. I swear their bones turn to water on command and they just slither out of your hands.

Bushra - *though

She forgot mayo has nine lives.

😂😂

@@journeyintococo6996 You could've also committed to correcting Mayo to Mayonnaise. Amateur.

@@SolidBushra - Very good.

Same 😂😂😂 that car looked like his life was completely over lmao

You’d think he had never purred in his life! He is very cute, though

@@yomomma5086 Me too, lol.

@@CoachCarter94 car

So basically, you're praising yourself 😂

I loved that line so much! I agree it does apply to this video as well

I don't think the cat thought he was going to die. He wasn't panicking or attacking or even shrieking, he was just really unhappy and wanted that mean groomer to stop tormenting him. Which is cute since he wasn't distressed at all with being a stinky mass of matted fur...

it was a love and hate relationship 🤣

It’s called a happy hoodie b/c it makes the GROOMER happy, not the wearer 🤓

it only heightens the look of persecution...lol

Lol I would love to names mayonnaise

Could be worse. Could be called Hellmanns instead. :D

Earl Gray that comment came straight to my brain in the voice of Rodney Dangerfield thanks to your avatar lol. Thank you for the reminder that his sarcasm is always with us.

@@blenderfox, Thank you. I was trying to remember the Brand Name. Yes, that would be worse.

@@QUICKBOOKS1 You're welcome

Floppa is our king

🤣 good one lol.

😂😂😂

Haha good one

Mayo is thinking ‘f***ing Hellman!’

And now YOU are on Mayo's hit list. :)

better than my friends friends dog named yayo -_-

@@kennynhizeclipse why is their name "yayo"???

😂😂😂😂😭

She really knows how to deliver her humor so perfectly lol

Like the South Park character? That’s hilarious!

@@holidayin7962 when he was a kitten, he was dumped in a field. We took him in and found out he had worms. To get him to take the pill he needed to, they coated it in butter. He almost attacked them over it because he wanted more butter. Thus the name. I wish it was a south park reference, but nah, my cat is addicted to land-o-lakes.

@@deoyx so am I so am I. No one does it butter than Land O Lakes. I'll show myself out...

@@LauraLancealot you could have at yeast warned me before that pun. I wasn't bread-y.

Well, it's better than naming your cat 'Burgers 'n Fries'. I think there's a video on KZfaq somewhere of a cat with the same name sitting in a cage and expressing rather vocally how pissed off he is.

More like a helmet, like the Iron Mask. Straitjacket means the limbs gotta be restrained as well.

Don't worry about this guy ☝️☝️☝️it never fails, always gotta be that 1 person that simply can't resist their urge to correct another person. A euphemism for a straight jacket is much funnier than a HeLMeT......Amirite or amirite??

😁😁😁😁😁😁

He's happy it's not the muzzle again

LMFAO

Just wait 'till cats evolve thumbs 😬

Lol, more like one ear open

@@NavarinoDC we're doomed once that happens.

You close your eyes?

As someone with two cats, I must ask, what sleep?

That cats eyes look like the clown from it.

Epic! 😂😂😂

you won’t live long enough to regret it*

Otherwise known as the "I will see you in ten years, I will be the last thing you ever see" gaze pearcing into your soul.

"today somebody ordered an extra spicy mayo" had me dead 😭😭

"tonight i will be sleeping with one eye open." WHEEZE

True

XD

This was cute it’s the “Tonight I will Sleeping With ONE EYE OPEN FOR ME “ 😂😂

this is literally 1 minute of a grooming session that likely took at least a whole hour. Im sure she gave him some pets and scratches more than you think

@@alyssabullock6421 well sure but like, not at that moment

@@alyssabullock6421 Yeah but we didn't get to see all those pets and scratches so it doesn't count.

@@Tol1as Exactly 😂

@@alyssabullock6421 it joke

Me: sprays a mist of Febreze into the air and walks thru the cloud. All good.

A 👍 a week later.. haha. Someone gets me! 😏

I don't know where to begin.. I'd like to thank my Mom for her support, and of course Greg for just being there and giving me guidance. Oh my gosh! I can't believe this is happening! I love you all so much..

@@-HighTide aww no problem pal.. not sure what I did but I'm glad I could help you out

@@gregdavid1032 Remember when you showed my your special thing on my 8th birthday 🎂? And you asked me not to tell anyone?