Thank you thank you thank you!!!!! This is so irresponsible, Katie has zero training and watching this without wincing is impossible!

I love that you quote Jesus. I see parallells between lots of his sayings and The Work.

This is a wonderful teaching practise here

Ultimately, it's our thoughts that cause the suffering. If we put our happiness or our feelings of well being onto the "offender", we give them the control over our happiness. We cannot change how other ppl behave, we can only change our relationship to it.... how WE feel about it. We own it... therefore we can change it.... and release it.

you can't set boundaries with someone when that person is insane in the moment!

@@hollygee9650 I agree. Then it's time to protect yourself.

Boundaries become clear with the turnarounds from what she wants from her mom, and asks it of herself.

Boundaries aren't for others, they're for ourselves. We can't control others but we can control what we do and we get to decide who we allow ourselves to vibe with. How do they love and are you open to be loved that way? How do they treat themselves and others and are you open to receive that treatment too? When we stop putting ourselves in a position to be a victim vs be accountable for our own behavior/thinking when others don't behave the way you think they should. They'll behave and be who they are regardless of the control we think we can have over them by shaming them or giving "better" directions. BK will say, "If my advice is so great, I should keep it." Is this an opportunity to critique their behavior or an opportunity to challenge my thoughts and beliefs I'm projecting onto the person I think should move outta my way?

Harriet Gallant you've missed it.

Cheap Guru. Saw a white light😵 People will believe anything.

What do you mean

Can't you see the healing in this video?

I agree - every session with Byron is like this. She's not a teacher so why is she doing this. I find it imperative she stop and leave it to real teachers and healing professionals. It must evolve beyond this charade.

​@@dalladi she's worked with actual therapist so you're spewing nonsense

Her teaching is consistent. It can be perceived as gaslighting if someone is looking from a right/wrong paradigm. What people realize when they are talking to Katie is what they need to stop suffering. It does not deny that what happened and the pain of the event/s actually happened. It helps people to look at the thoughts that they continue to believe that are not happening now so they do not prolong their own suffering in their mind. So much violence is caused by people believing thoughts that are stressful but since they don't question their thoughts they don't realize that there are very many less stressful thoughts that are just as true. She is having people accept what is true. So many people are angry at others because the others are incapable (or don't choose to ) of giving them what they think they need but instead of sanely realizing that you can't get blood from a stone and finding how to give yourself what you need people rage because the world and people do/es not fit their wanted fantasy. This questioning restores sane thinking. You might see that some people may need deeper work but this is not gaslighting and it's valuable for what it is. If you watch a whole bunch of the BK questioning videos you will see how freeing it is for people to let go of their suffering thoughts and see clearly life, people and their own thoughts for what they actually are.

More like Google scares me.

That's called synchronicity. In the Bible it's ask, seek, knock. Google did bring it to you, but your mind state brought it to yourself

I'm struggling with this method too because my mother rages and scares not only me but others! I have had to go no contact to begin to heal!

I definitely think toxic people should be physically removed from our space and be told that their behavior is unacceptable.

I agree

It's idealism... delusion that people can just change to suit us, our preferences based upon our desires. it is a shock for those who live in the mind.

@Susan Penn Let’s go down your path. So, her mother hit her and she got her out of the car. The hit is in the past, the mother is not in the car anymore, she’s trying to move on, but in her mind she keeps re-living and imagining the situation she got hit by her mom, accompanied by thoughts like: “She doesn’t love me”,”why doesn’t she protect me?”,”why is she not different”,”she must hate me” … and so on. Sounds like hell to always re-experiencing that moment being hit fallowed up by these mean thoughts. Now who’s re-living and torturing her? Her mother, who hit her once, or that lady, with what she’s thinking and believing? See, that’s the reason why BK is always asking, without thinking and believing what you do, are you ok? It seem’s to me, you are still trying to figure out who’s in the right and who did wrong. Maybe you feel like the need somebody needs to be blamed and punished for the wrong doing? Maybe you think that lady is being blamed for re-acting wrong to her mom? Could it be? Either way, thing is, we aren’t like leafs in the wind. We re-act to what we are thinking and believing. And that can torture us a lot. Which is why when we do inquiry on our thinking and believing, our inner world changes, though the outside world doesn’t change at all.

Now I have to look up Harriet Tubman 💙

Oh she sounds like a wonderful amazing person ( I am not American so didn’t know of her..I guess she must be iconic in USA )

Do you think this work encourages denial and de association?

Past images like these put you in a constant stress state and inspire negative coping mechanisms. Byron Katie gives this woman space from that state so she can understand her mother now according to reality now instead of needing the stress of her mother now and the past mother that only inspires stress and doesn't exist. That's called truth and freedom

Maybe but don’t follow him on the Ayhuasca route…..this is not a wise move.

Our thoughts/thinking are either our best friend worst enemy if their serving you change them. Most of them aren’t true👍you can do this. 👏

@@mariehaverty8209 she can do it IF she/he really wants to.

You are the author of your autobiography. You have total control of what story you choose to tell.

I hear you. I too am going through it. A living hell. How are you doing now? Well I hope!

What do you mean?

This option is at the top of the page

It's a rational fear but what's on the line in this situation is her own grace and realistic response to the situation now. A stress state inspired by the past images of her mother that isn't real and also now will undermine that. The turn around return her to space separate of both her mother and her past images bringing her stress so that she can respond with grace and meet her own needs. That is truth reality and freedom

It's all nuts. Good on you for seeing it. I wish people would stop believing these charlatans. Those unwell women take this crap and raise their kids with that, it's basically gaslighting and invalidation. Find yourselves a good therapist. Someone who actually has an education. Not a wanna be guru who saw white light and changed overnight. Come on people.

She looks forward to it so she can use it to create space and make the graceful choice. People like her mother are a part of reality so she's getting skills to grow truth space and grace within her thanks to looking forward to and doing that.

@@cmath6454 You're actually replying to everyone that doesn't agree with this, why?

@@tanjapavlovic5624 because I have something to offer.

Gaslighting.

I feel this isn't intended to make ourselves act another way, though there are friendly suggestions put forward by BK for the next time we confront a belief. BK is trying to lift the veil of belief that stands between the one we believe they are and the one they actually are. Once this veil is lifted, there is more understanding of ourselves and the others. BK brings a clarity and patience into the cognitive /behavioural that the jargon practically doesn't.

@@pooja7336 friendly suggestions that earn her a lot of money. If she helps you, that is great, and I really mean it. I am just speaking from my own perspective of finding her work not helpful, and in situations harmful.

@@BelleTolles You've just set up a situation though, where the only people who are truly intent on helping other people - are those who do it entirely for free. The only people who are capable of doing that day to day are those who've agreed to be penniless monks. Why - in your opinion - can't people who earn money also be helpful? This isn't in defense of BK. I wouldn't suggest people persist in abusive relationships, or in acidic relationships that they can't handle. I'm just commenting for that trap I see people fall into regarding anything humanitarian/positive + money.

@@Nikki.Nasvytis I get what you mean, and don't feel that way at all. Working in mental health can be very demanding. I was responding more to the person's wording when she said she just offered some friendly suggestions, as if she was just a bud. I find her to be not so much about friendly suggestions as to be dogmatic

@@BelleTolles Recently, I heard a podcast where in a girl was using the work on an abuse that happened during her early years. Interestingly the more she sat on the moment, the more she remembered. She started the work blaming herself that she didn't stand for herself. The more she became still, she discovered that she stood and spoke for herself and even her younger brother, boldly at the time of the abuse, despite being a little girl. The way that something happened and the way we remember it can be strikingly different. That's the cause of suffering in most cases. Clarity gives us a choice. If we find that we are actually in an abusive relationship, clarity gives us a choice to step out. Clarity gives us the strength to say no to trauma bonds. The work is clarity. It helps us see things as they are and leaves us with the power to opt the most compassionate choice. If you ask me, that's all that life demands from us, in exchange for peace, joy and love.

How do you know that ? You have posted the exact same words on other videos, what is your intention?

@@theinngu5560 Yes, you’re right. My comments have a special purpose. As you’ve noted that, I’ll give you some information, there are no coincidences in our world of illusions. *** 1. There are not two, but three: Consciousness, Subconsciousness and Unconsciousness. 2. The reflex, physically real, organ, holds our consciousness in the Unconscious state, the temporary shutdown of the sabotage of which made it possible to obtain irrefutable proof. 3. To prove the irrefutable significance of my esoteric version, I use one screenshot from the study of the interaction of my consciousness, "mind" and physical result, conducted while playing online roulette, and which is shown in the picture of my KZfaq channel (kzfaq.info/love/3vwpwQYHwLss2y99S4F3Rg). This picture shows the moment when I placed 5 (!!!) winning bets at the same time: 1 - on black, 2 - on the bigger half of the numbers (19-36), 3 - on the third column (27-36), on the two columns (28-33) and immediately on two numbers 28-31. The METHOD by which I can make such bets in a real online casino proves that our reality is an absurdity, or rather, a pure trick for our consciousness. *** Good luck.

Yam, once the mind is healed the physical healing will come. Of course you have to find it yourself, no one can do it for you.

She’s referring to the specific memory. In the memory the mom is not hitting her, she is losing it in the backseat. The point is why mentally beat yourself before actually being beaten. Doesn’t mean she shouldn’t get the hell out of a relationship with someone who is abusive or that she should just be okay with what has happened. The point is she’s suffering before she is being hurt in the present because she is reliving hurt that happened previously. Even if you can remove that preemptive suffering, that’s still less suffering to bare. She still needs to stay away from people who treat her that way, even if it’s her mom.

Thank you...I was feeling the same. I'd be the hottest mess sitting there trying to be vulnerable and trying to say whatever... knowing the problem is so much bigger and more complex than what is being crammed down her throat as an instant therapy cure.

Unfortunately you have no understanding of this work.

@@binathere2574 Feel free to explain. I have never seen or heard of such 'methods'. I like to understand cause it seems absolutely and abusively wack to me as you can tell by my comments. And if the flight of reality slogan "nobody else can ever hurt me" is involved - I believe that is for robots and not people.

@@sarahmonday8060 Sarah, keep your beautiful critical thinking. It's gonna keep you safe in this world!

Awesome!!! Yessss!!! She's NOT a therapist. Like myriads of charlatans and con-men/women she saw a white light then she changed over night! Poof! They are legions. From Bill W, founder of AA to Eckart Tolle. They make A LOT of money on vulnerable people who are looking for a fast solution.

...and you have it all sorted do you ? you are your own "free person"...free from your childhood conditioning?Are you fully self aware and no longer running an unconscious programme or inner dialogue or system of beliefs based on yoiur childhood where you may have internalised false beliefs or ways of being in response to the dysfucntional environment you where surrounded by.? This woman is becoming an adult and claiming her full power..if you think for any moment she is blaming or not taking responsibility for herself now and moving on than you are really wrong. Most or many people spend their whole lives living out unconscious patterns of early conditioning...you may well be one of them ?

@@upendasana7857 You twisted everything I said. Of course; that's what someone like you does. You have NO integrity! At her age... she should have pulled her big-girl pants up a long time ago. Stop acting like a victim and start acting like an adult! Almost Everyone has had childhood issues, including me, but there comes a point in life where people take charge of their own lives. The sooner, the better! Who the hell are you anyway to stick your big nose into this? No wonder people continue to act-out their inner-child. You're certainly no help to her! Or Anyone!

@ Stephen Smith, Many look like adults but act like children. You seem to be one of them. You are being critical and hardened by the cruelty you propagate. Repeating your mantra of I’m all grown up while pointing the finger. I can imagine you being like her mother yelling how someone else is the monster. I’m glad I’m not your daughter, or even someone you know. Be well Stephen. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Well, the whole video was about reclaiming her power. But without shaming her and telling her "you are an adult, grow up"! Byron Katie knows that no one has ever grown up by being told to do so. We grow up when we question our conditioning.

@@Puuws Your analogy is that of a two year old, talking to an adult. You're speaking from a childish notion and not from a position of knowledge. One must have an education in this field in order to come from a place of knowing. You don't even know that the nervous system has NOTHING to do with stored emotion, thought, or ANYTHING! You'd be best served by keeping your thoughtless opinions to yourself!