"If I'm so smart, why am I losing?" Amazing way to check your own ego and get the hell out of your own way.

Building a relationship and working with someone you don’t like to achieve a mission. That’s professionalism. That’s how you win.

“You’re damn right I’m hostile towards people that aren’t squared away” I died

I've learned from listening to Jocko and applying his wisdom that the phrase "how can I help?" solves almost any conflict. Nothing disarms an adversary and puts my own ego in check like sincerely, humbly trying to help the person my ego views as a threat. If I can hold back my emotions and reactions (unattaching) long enough to think rationally, I can turn almost any situation into a positive learning experience (for all involved parties). In religion, politics, business, and interpersonal relationships, the ability to distinguish between literal threats and "non-factors" are the key to the success of your agenda. Thanks for the awesome info as always!!

I love how jocko admits his mistakes as a young man. Trying to be tough... I’m 31 realizing how stupid I’ve been but, I learn from my mistakes and trying to be a better man everyday.

P/S, I was pleasantly surprised last week to find out that my teenage daughter listens to your podcasts. This is how I found out: I started playing one of your clips and she was in the room. She said, "Hey mom - is that the Navy Seal guy's podcast? You know him too 😲?" So you guys should know your reaching out to multiple generations and effectively changing lives for better!!!! Thank you for all you do.

I have a boss I am forced to see first thing in morning and one thing ive realized is if you just treat them with kindness and don’t expect anything back from them.... you will win every single time because even when you just say good morning and they don’t respond... they think they are insulting you with not responding but if you know better and understand that them not responding is due to their own unhappiness then them not responding is you WINNING lol

One of my instructors when I was in class to become a towercrane driver told me " you can be the best operator in the crane but if you do not know how to handle your ground crew or the people you serve, you will suck and not have a long career up there ". or you can mess up many times but if your crew loves you, you will be a legend " I have never forgotten those words because that was a golden. To this day I still hear him yelling through my radio " NO MERCY FOR YOU DANNY BOY " My first try in a new company and 5 days later I had the job and best crew ever. Know how to handle your people.

This really hit home...I've always thought I was humble but deep down I'm too conceited...I'm gonna work on it from here on out

“If I’m so smart, why can’t I influence this person.” Simple yet true. I’m in sales and that’s been a hang up of mine recently. It’s my fault.

This is work 101, there is always someone you like less. After a while you just manage to ignore that fact, you are at work to get it done, friends are a bonus.

I watch this everyday before work. I’ve been promoted twice since I started. The one I didn’t like now works underneath me. I am still not finished. Still have a mission that needs to be completed. Thanks for your inspiration.

"That sounds manipulative, conniving, not keeping it real" - Being autistic, to me even keeping it real is a sort of act that I learned to perform, so in a way I learned to view all behaviour as manipulative or somewhat acted. What matters is the intention, and when the intention is to get shit done, being cooperative and respectful to someone you despise is 100% true to the intention to get shit done. Maybe not true to your feelings but the point was to get shit done not to express your feelings.

Jocko often looks like a little boy with a big secret he can't wait to tell his best friend :)

Rule number 1, never outshine the master

I love how you guys can be humble and tough at the same time. Too many tough guys out there need to humble themselves

“Be friendly, but not friends”

Love the humility that Jocko shows in his response here. Really says a lot about the character of a man to acknowledge his weaknesses.

"Being humble goes a loooong way" - Only being 30 years old and I've realized this. Being honest about your mistakes and showing how you can improve them combined with being humble about your skills and limitations will ease most tensions. I've been to meetings where the room was electrified coming in. But being just 1 person in there to stay the course of the objective helped so much in rebuilding a bit of trust and removing tensions for further development

"wisdom based on humility leads to progress. wisdom based on hostility leads to regress" Eugene Logan

Our own EGO can be the worst enemy. A good book to read is "Ego is the Enemy" by Ryan Holiday

Wonderful stuff, Jocko. This can often work in both directions, too -- depending on the situation. You notice another is being disrespectful or even hostile all the time, so you say to him: "I know you have very little respect for me at present, and that might or might not change later on -- I can live with it either way. But for now, I think you'll agree that, as your supervisor/boss/brother, I am entitled to your co-operation. Without it, the unit/company/family is damaged -- and neither one of us wants that. Do you want to try and go forward on that basis?" (Everybody learns that it isn't what others think of me that really matters -- it's what I think of me. And bad behavior, no matter how justified, will sooner or later always make me think less of myself.)

"I got dinged on my evaluation, it was for lack of communication or something, I dunno I wasn't really listening" (paraphrased). lul.

'' If I am so smart, why am I not winning? '' That kinda got through me because I sabotage myself pretty often just out of pride and stubbornness, although I know Im consciously deciding to lose as long as I feel I am right. So my principles are more important for me than to succed in certain situations, which leads to a lot of unhappiness obviously and I feel like I should change that behavior. Well thanks for the great content!

Jocko, this came at the right time. You gotta know how I play the game to get ahead and care for those who you do actually like. Love you podcast, full of wisdom and insights.

These videos are great! I really appreciate your advice!

We get taught we screw up then have to relearn,I’m blown away at 45 and sober I’m putting myself through this self mentoring by watching Jocko and have been for the last yr,there’s no amount of thanks I can give I wake to the man I lift to him I run to him he’s literally the dad I I never had and I wish I had.

That was one of the best podcasts of Jocko I ever heard. And Echo has much more intense energy in this one.

"Keep your friends close, and your enemies closer." (The Godfather Rule)

I drove a cab for a couple of years and one thing that learned is that if you don't respond to difficult people in a way that escalates the situation and you keep a consistent level head and do not let them influence the way that you handle the situation, 9 times out of ten they settle down rather quickly and end up with a much more productive situation.

found your podcast couple days ago, i cant wait to check out the backlog of old podcasts!

Agreed,we must start with Humility! Thank you! Very helpful!

I'm doing my best, and hearing this I noticed I have things I could do better or be better at. And I'm thankful for that.

Sitting here eating my post workout meal and getting life lessons from Jocko... Life is good. Much love n respect! 🤙🤙🤙

I am in a challenging situation and this is so helpful. Thank you.

This subject resonates with me and I imagine most people. Ego and pride can be major stumbling blocks for all people.

Jocko dropping gems all day, every day!

You know, this is the reassurance I needed to hear to motivate me to let go of my personal ambitions for the sake of my team.

Be kind to people, but don't let them take advantage of you. And trust people, but don't let them deceive you.

This the mentality of a true team leader & team worrier u go Jocko💪🙏👍

My last job i got fired after telling a coworker off who I felt the victim of bullying/gossip etc... Even though I was right, I could tell I really lost in that situation. I couldn't just let it go and i lost sight of my bigger mission. It was a very toxic work place but I could've left with more grace. But I'm grateful it happened and is in the past because I know not to let it happen again

Once again you have shared the necessary tools for success. I dont have the right words to express how valuable the information you provide is to me, and everyone else looking for answers and solutions. Thank you.

It's nice to hear how much I was also like Jocko when I was young. I smiled ear to ear through this whole video.

'Being humble goes a loooong way'.

So many people get in their own way at work by thinking that reacting emotionally and bitching at everyone and everything means that they are genuine and have integrity. This should be mandatory viewing. At work, integrity means working together and I don’t care who you like or don’t like.

Thank you jocko I needed this it helped me more that you know just be humble

Always finding some great take aways from your podcasts!!! thank you!!

Thank you for putting your input and valuable responses for people as a teenager going into rotc and having goals in sf I’m lucky to have such an amazing amount of information before me.

Applying this lesson NOW.

Jocko your the man dude! So fascinating and knowledgeable! I been telling anyone with ears about your podcast

Great wisdom again from Jocko and EchoCharles!

Thank you jocko and echo Charles. I needed to hear this.

Good info to reflect on and adapt to!

I needed this... thank you so much!!

Love the content! Really helps me look deep within myself and keep my own ego in check!

This is amazing wisdom and exactly what I needed to hear right now!👊🏼💥🇺🇸🦅🏆

amazing lesson about life and our relationships with other people....

I would just like to thank you for the assistance you offered me as a young man. I've got myself together. Ill be the general manager of the restaurant I've been working at since highschool. I WILL be an owner and franchisee before I'm 21. So thanks for the help in realizing what im capable of.

So true. It's the ego that makes us dislike other people. A good soul search has helped me many a times. From observing people who really have a name in society, but "carry out the trash out" voluntarily, that to me is a lasting lesson than the man-made "Thou shalt not!!!" Thank you for these podcasts.

Jocko's message and method is worthy to be saluted every time we listen. His sidekick cheer leader needs to grow up.

This is an awakening for me, this is me 100%, Thank you for this interview, I have been a stubborn bone head all this time. Moving forward im putting my ego in check. New subscriber

You are a powerful human, and a leader. We love you

Thank you Jocko, I needed to hear this today.

The point is you are not trying to win "for" people you don't like. You just have to win with them. So being polite to them and not expecting nice response and dedicated work from them are included as your job to win something. Stay in the course to win something and complete your mission. That's all about professionalism. Thanks Jocko

This video is spot on. Maybe Jocko's best podcast. Keeping the ego in check solves 80% of all relationship problems inside the team and outside the team.

Really like these short clips as well. Thanks, Echo...I think.

Damn G! Needed to hear this today! Shout out to jocko and echo for dropping some free game.

Jocko, I wish I had heard these words 6 months ago. This is pure wisdom.

This just assisted me in my Flight Chief mission. I now have the wordage I have been trying to find to speak with my boss. I have the same goal of team win and this video just sparked my mind and we will see how tonight comes out. This is what I needed and couldn't find the way to explain it.

True story... when you don’t like someone & you’re honest with yourself about the answer, it will often be your own ego that’s in the way! It’s often something you don’t like about yourself that you see in the other person!

It’s a good realization to have also knowing what winning and losing is to you personally is a good measured the understand it’s different for everybody.

This is what I needed to hear. Thanks Jocko

Always great content from these lads.

Thank you for the insightful video much appreciated it

I'm dealing with someone I don't believe deserves his position right now, but I believe this video opened me up, hopefully I'll be able to continue working with him by putting my ego in check and help get the common goal achieved.

Learning a lot of ways ego can manifest itself listening to Jocko. Tons of stuff for me to improve on. Bonus also is it enhances empathy and insight into others. Stripping away the things my ego could be competing for means I can focus my passions and energies on more meaningful endeavors with awareness that can benefit others and myself. Might be an age thing but I'm noticing that all the stuff ego could compete for or advertise has the additional liabilities of maintenance and deception. Maintenance in the form of you gotta keep whatever you think your ego is holding on to and deception if you try and convince others of something you don't have. If your worried about losing respect, jobs or relationships over losing that, what did you really have anyway? You were on borrowed time and son, the clock just ran out...😳

I love jocko’s lessons cause they can all be applied in pretty much any aspect of your life like this question if I am so smart, why am I not winning

This is great content. Hits right home.

Always on point, Jocko! Love this!!

Thats Amazing Jocko, wow. Well done man, thank you!

Great lesson, thank you.

Thank you. Honesty is the framework for progress.

I like being the team member who does everything above and beyond what is expected me without expectations from anyone. It's a good way too measure the quality of people we work with. When asked for volunteers always be first. Do your duty without being asked to do it. Don't complain or whine about anything. Don't talk about people if they are not their to defend themselves. The less we speak the more we listen and the more we listen the more we understand and the more we understand the more we can accomplish.

Incredible perspective, I cannot thank you enough.

Day to day i put jocko’s advice into play through various scenarios i have in life. Never yet has the advise let me down. Every time i hear a piece here a piece there i think how can i relate this back in my world. And man oh man its got me promotions respect and above all MISSION ACCOMPLISHED. And thats what i am about getting the best out of myself and my team. Forget these motivational wanna be’s. JW spells it out in full colour for me. When i need some info i just turn into here and shut up and listen..

Can’t believe I just discovered this guy. So much insight

Thanks Bro, so needed to hear this

I learned this Jocko and I hope you read this. I'm 22 and learned if they're smart, be tough. If they are tough be smart. If they are foolish, be righteous. If they are righteous, be a bit foolish.

100% agree. I would also add to build the relationship by asking opposition sincere honest questions on their way of thinking, listen, don't interrupt, let them encourage them elaborate more. You can still hold your ground and respectfully challenge, do but with calm self control.

Puts things in perspective. Thank you.

Thank you. I haven't had anyone to talk too about this. It completed my reasoning regarding how to handel this situation. I have bin switching between aggression and giving in totally. Or feeling like a lying fake when I create a relationship with people I genuinely dislike. But if I can see it as a means for the greater good, it feels ok. Iam surprised how much I can take with me from your talks considering we have different gender, age and roles in society.

always relationships are helpful to succeed our goals.when i listen this i think stupid and smart are the changing surround to move forward..i thank the both to talking real matters i face this life.this is lot of knowledge.challengfull ideals.

Hey guys, I needed this one! I’m in barber school and I really had to put my ego in check yesterday. I just feel like I’m not getting anything out of my education at the school. The instructor and his wife are crooks. They don’t even teach anything and it’s a blessing I know how to cut already and keep my business running. They profit off their students and students aren’t able to do much about which created a toxic environment or made me not want to go. They threaten to suspend me if I keep skipping school and they charge you money for missing attendance hours. I can’t afford miss anymore if I want my license honestly. I’m glad I saw this video bc I was going to drop out of something I love doing. I can’t let them get in the way man. Again, thank you.

6:15 you're understanding your own limitations and his limitations and taking charge of getting him to comply because he wants to, not against his ego. you're being the man.

As much as I love the theory of this, there are people who will abuse your willingness to let your guard down. If they are in your family, they are inescapable unless you can manage to cut all contact or keep them at a distance. There is a point where this will become inviting abuse, at least in a certain context. If you're dealing with a normal person, yeah, this advice works. It's a pretty good method to filter out people who you can develop respect for, and people who aren't willing to respect others.

I totally agree as a starting point. Spot on, I agree with every thing. The thing I don't think you take into account is how moderate to high level narcissists treat weak individuals who show humility. It's a terrible cycle. It damages individuals long term. It's fair that you didn't bring it up, because it's relatively uncommon.

Yup the last bit resonates with me. So many people get to a position of authority and things become 'beneath' them. I always take out the trash

"Never outshine the master."

Jocko’s book helped me at work a lot! I need the new Leadership field manual

I love the black and white recording. Just a few lights in their faces. Awesome stuff