I’m in burnout and it sucks | real life autistic exasperation

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Mom on the Spectrum

Mom on the Spectrum

10 ай бұрын

I've been going in and out of burnout and it's so frustrating. I keep allllmost getting out of it and trying to do normal human things only to realize that doing so pushes me back down into burnout land. So. I decided to make a video about it because I haven't been able to make a video about anything else.
I didn't intend this video to be one that promotes my new weighted pillow, but it kinda worked out. So, if you want to check it out, here's my affiliate link: www.onequietmind.com/?ref=tay... It's truly awesome and I take it all over the house with me all day long. It's great to use as a lap pillow while I'm working and running meetings. A portion of the pillow proceeds will come back to the channel. Thanks for your support!
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DISCLAIMER: Taylor Heaton is not a licensed psychologist or specialist healthcare professional. Her services do not replace the care of psychologists or other healthcare professionals. Please note that Taylor can’t take any responsibility for the results of your actions, nor any harm or damage you suffer as a result of the use, or non-use of the information available through her website, KZfaq Channel, or social media accounts. Please use judgment and conduct due diligence before taking any action or implementing any plan or practice suggested or recommended by Taylor Heaton or Mom on the Spectrum. Please note that Taylor doesn't make any guarantees about the results of the information you may apply from her website, KZfaq channel, and/or social media accounts. Taylor shares educational and informational resources that are intended to help you succeed in navigating life as an autistic adult. You nevertheless need to know that your outcome will be the result of your own efforts, your particular situation, and innumerable other circumstances beyond Taylor's knowledge and control. Taylor is an Amazon affiliate and may receive commissions on qualifying purchases from affiliate links. Taylor is a Flare affiliate and may receive commissions on qualifying purchases from Flare links.
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Пікірлер: 458
@jilleinhorn3466
@jilleinhorn3466 10 ай бұрын
Hi Taylor! I think you were referring to something I said, so I am trying to remember it for you. I think it was: “I used to get mad at myself because I couldn’t function the way that neurotypical people do. But I don’t do that anymore, because I’m NOT neurotypical.” I am sending good vibes your way and hope that you can get some useful rest soon. Thanks for sharing content like this, so we can all feel less alone.
@MomontheSpectrum
@MomontheSpectrum 10 ай бұрын
YES! It was you 🙃🙃🙃 thank you Jill!! I loved what you said and I appreciate you leaving it here so others can see it too :)
@samrobbins4520
@samrobbins4520 10 ай бұрын
I'm in PT school right now, and I'm experiencing a ridiculous (re: average) amount of ableism in my program right now. It's hard trying to do work and prepare for exams when the structure of school just isn't built for me. It's hard.
@florite007
@florite007 10 ай бұрын
Taylor and all please learn clinical eft Techniques and practice them. Also, if you keep non vegan that will negatively affect you as eating cruelty and suffering will affect how we feel even when we are not thinking it does. Dr Robert Morse tv explains a lot of stuff well on that and there is a free course available to all and no spamming on @1ReikiFloW channel and eftuniverse has free resources too but they will market so just unsubscribe if you need. Eft not only regulates our brain and feelings and outcome it also works within 5 min and it’s free as everyone of us has meridians in the body and that’s il what we use. The tapping itself while being stressed 😩 a what creates the outcome and it works faster than anything I have tried in my only 44 years of being exposed to all healing stuff and we went through real pedo abuse and much more so most of you don’t have that on top and hence it will be even faster probably. Stop wasting time with conventional stuff that doesn’t work!
@emilycampbell5798
@emilycampbell5798 8 ай бұрын
I feel the same right now. I’m a wreck!! But exams are coming
@hanaholmgren
@hanaholmgren 10 ай бұрын
I’ve been in the middle of a diagnosis journey, but I’m 99% sure I’m on the spectrum and it’s very likely that I also have ADHD, and hearing about your experience is incredibly validating for me. The burnout hit HARD today, and it’s incredible to have words to describe what I’m feeling instead of just “I’m exhausted and over sensitive and I don’t know why.” When I hit that point, like you, I’m exhausted but I can’t seem to sleep, and while I know I need rest it’s impossible to do anything without feeling worse. I graduated with my masters degree back in May, and I have felt the crash looming for a while, now that my routine has been thrown completely off and I’m supposed to be starting a new job that I want to be excited for but can only seem to feel anxious about. Thank you for sharing your experiences. It really, really helps.
@audreyjordan4444
@audreyjordan4444 10 ай бұрын
Literally laying in bed is taxing, because I feel so uncomfortable and can feel every bone in my body. I know what depression feels like and can genuinely say I’m not depressed, but definitely relate to burn out!
@MomontheSpectrum
@MomontheSpectrum 10 ай бұрын
Yes sometimes it is so hard for me to lay still in bed too. Honestly the weighted pillow is helping with that a lot.
@lucyarque2946
@lucyarque2946 24 күн бұрын
Oh i feel this. I have some joint issues so I’m often spending ages trying to find a position that I can relax in, while the whole time feeling desperate just to lay still and do nothing…
@Kawooya
@Kawooya 10 ай бұрын
I can't say enough how much I relate to all of this. Keep pushing myself back into burnout, can't eat, can't sleep, all sensory information overwhelming. You're not alone 😩
@LightsandVessels
@LightsandVessels 10 ай бұрын
Yes! I feel like I'd need years to recover, having pushed myself so hard for years in an attempt to be NT
@Truerealism747
@Truerealism747 3 ай бұрын
​@@LightsandVesselsdo you have chronic muscle pain with it and are you hypermobile you see ime diagnosed now autism ADHD heds fybromyalgia cfs symptoms years is it autism burnout ling term
@thiccletics
@thiccletics 10 ай бұрын
From one mom to another- I see you. It’s ok. Take your weekends or whenever you have “days off” and give the kids the Netflix, the tablets and plop yourself on the sofa as much as possible….. get a hammock and set it up inside!! Trust me ❤
@MomontheSpectrum
@MomontheSpectrum 10 ай бұрын
Ooooh I do love hammocks. Thank you for the support and the recommendation!
@mikicionekk3554
@mikicionekk3554 10 ай бұрын
​@@MomontheSpectrum😘😘😘
@Elizabethpepper8
@Elizabethpepper8 5 ай бұрын
When you're in long term chronic burn out and this is all you can do being an unsupported, isolated single mom the guilt and anxiety and hatred from this has severely worsened my mental health which had prolonged burn out, i believe.
@DaveShap
@DaveShap 10 ай бұрын
For me, one of the (several) major breakthroughs I had in recovering from burnout was directly confronting perfectionism. I was extremely lazy as a teenager but then I got into the workforce and realized that a lot of my deficits in school were super powers in the corporate world. And then a series of other events basically made me become a workaholic and perfectionist, and that was one of the biggest contributors to my burnout. A key thing I learned about perfectionism is that it can be internally focused (e.g. I have to do things exactly right and be the best, etc) and it can be externally focused (e.g. my surroundings have to be perfectly right, or people have to be correct, etc). And so anyways, my point is that unpacking both of these dispositions of perfectionism has helped immensely. Hope it helps you.
@MomontheSpectrum
@MomontheSpectrum 10 ай бұрын
I deal with a lot of internal perfectionism. Thanks for putting this into words.
@DanKoenigJr
@DanKoenigJr 10 ай бұрын
Hi Taylor. I just today received my diagnosis of Autism Spectrum Disorder today. Everything you are describing makes total sense! For the life of me I couldn’t figure it all out. I actually put myself into the psych unit in the hospital for three days. But every single thing that you mentioned was exactly what I was feeling. I’m so thankful that I found your channel. I feel like im no longer alone in my brain.
@vivianstewart7523
@vivianstewart7523 10 ай бұрын
Congrats on the diagnosis!
@sonoftorin
@sonoftorin 10 ай бұрын
@@vivianstewart7523 It sounds like such a weird thing to say but congratulations is really the sentiment I’m feeling too. It’s so hard to even find someone to take you seriously then to find someone who is current on their autism knowledge, then to get through the waitlist and everything else-yeah. Congrats! Being part of a community and making sense of your life is huge! I hope to achieve the same one day.
@manifest2963
@manifest2963 10 ай бұрын
It’s really hard with my directors telling me to push through. My bf said to ignore that and take care of myself. Them being uncomfortable with my taking care of myself is only about them. It’s a hard lesson.
@Life_with_Lissett
@Life_with_Lissett 10 ай бұрын
Very relatable for me today. Need to JUST REST. Sending Light and progress ❤
@gardengirl4718
@gardengirl4718 10 ай бұрын
I'm 64 years old, diagnosed 1 month before I turned 60, and the best thing the diagnosis did for me was that I was then able to give myself permission to HAVE autism. I don't even like that term. I prefer to think of it as simply being on the spectrum, not someone who 'has' something. I'm just different from the majority of society. That said, when my body reaches burnout the very best thing I can do is to just accept that it is a part of my life and if I don't listen to it things will only get worse. I TOTALLY get the skin hurting thing. I'm sensitive to smells too and they are way worse when I'm burned out. So give yourself permission. Your body is just the way it is supposed to be so do the things YOU need to do to overcome the burnout no matter how long it takes. And remember that we all out here love you too and are cheering you on. 🥰🥰🥰
@catherinegrace7999
@catherinegrace7999 10 ай бұрын
@gardengirl4718 Could u please share what type of test they used for you? And what type of doctor? Also 60 & known for yrs I'm on spectrum but hard to find test covered by insurance. (My online test from UK was 42 out of 50 but I'm on Kentucky )
@gardengirl4718
@gardengirl4718 10 ай бұрын
@@catherinegrace7999 I went to a psychologist who had experience diagnosing autism. The tests she administered (I believe there were 2 of them) were a series of statements and I would answer on a spectrum from I don't at all agree to I strongly agree as to how true they were about myself. She also had my husband fill out one of the tests as he felt they applied to me. I also remember there being a series of pictures she showed me and I had to make a statement about how I felt the people in the pictures were relating to each other. I don't remember what any of the tests were called - what their formal titles were. Have you looked online to see if there are any autism support groups in your area? That was how I got the name of the doctor I saw. Best of luck to you in finding the right kind of doctor and getting the answers you're looking for!
@jourdaenwilson5443
@jourdaenwilson5443 10 ай бұрын
Thank you for sharing your perspective and advice!
@Myheartswords
@Myheartswords 12 күн бұрын
Thank you ❤❤ I need that permission too ❤ I feel your words ❤
@gardengirl4718
@gardengirl4718 12 күн бұрын
@@catherinegrace7999 I'm so sorry I didn't see this sooner! I'm afraid I don't remember what tests were used in my diagnosis but they mostly involved with answering statements about things on a spectrum from 'I'm totally this way' to 'I'm not at all this way.' There were also a series of pictures in which I had to make up a plausible story for what was going on in the picture. My husband also filled out one of the question tests as he thought it related to me. I saw a psychologist who is qualified to diagnose autism. I contacted an autism support group in the city where I was living at the time to get a recommendation on qualified doctors near me. I had also done online tests and my results on both were 'likely has autism' which is what prompted me to finally get myself evaluated. It's definitely a journey. I'm hoping by now you already have your diagnosis but in case you don't I hope this helps! Best wishes!
@cowsonzambonis6
@cowsonzambonis6 10 ай бұрын
Noooo I’m so sorry!!! I’m finally getting out of a massive burnout, and everything you describe…so awful! 😭 I hope you can get regulated again soon ❤❤❤
@tattooedmomma
@tattooedmomma 10 ай бұрын
You have no idea how much your video resonated with me. My skin burns all the time, sometimes worse than others. Today i haven't wanted to see anyone or even say any words. I've been living in my big headphones all day. I've had palpitations a few years now, and no heart issues. I was recently diagnosed so I'm still coming to grips with all this and learning all i can. Thank you for showing me I'm not alone.
@TeaLaRee
@TeaLaRee 10 ай бұрын
My skin burns too omg! 😮
@tattooedmomma
@tattooedmomma 10 ай бұрын
@@TeaLaRee I'm very sorry you're dealing with it too. It's miserable.
@TeaLaRee
@TeaLaRee 10 ай бұрын
@tattooedmomma I deal with it time to time but didn't know it could be autism? Thank you for saying that because it all makes sense now . I'm sad you deal with it too. Big hug 🫂
@cammie49
@cammie49 10 ай бұрын
My daughter has “stabby pains” all over her body for her why life. She thought everyone did. I think it like the burning skin thing maybe 🤔
@lorifarmer9692
@lorifarmer9692 9 ай бұрын
Vasovagal syncope has got my burnout autism losing the shit
@J_in_the_Tardis
@J_in_the_Tardis 10 ай бұрын
Thank you, Taylor - for everything, but especially this.
@nryane
@nryane 10 ай бұрын
Before I was diagnosed at 80, what you describe is what I believed was grief. I’ve had a lot of that in the past 10 years. Even today, in therapy, naming the feeling about what is going on in my life, recently, was challenging. There was shame, but not-shame. More like anxiety, mixed with shame. Feeling my mortality and recognizing that I’ve lost a lot of my joy, because I’ve worried about not doing enough, being enough, doing things “right”, about what others think of me, etc. So, watching you struggle to tell us what’s going on for you, so we can have a sense of connection with you, with the world, I feel empathy for anyone (YOU) going through burnout. Thank you for letting us know that you are taking care of yourself the best you can. Water is an issue for me, as well. Luckily, I’ve developed eating schedules that work for me, even when I’m not 100%. Wishing you wellbeing. ❤
@kj3d812
@kj3d812 10 ай бұрын
Taylor, I know exactly what you mean when you say it's like your "skin is so sensitive it can hear." I have that, too, when I'm overwhelmed! It's like the air hurts against my skin, and sounds are like knife blades scraping across it. For me it's an almost sunburn feeling, as if the air and the sounds have been so abrasive they've "burned" my skin. Everything you talk about, I totally understand. I go through those things and think, what the eff is the matter with me?! But then I remind myself that I'm autistic, and I give myself some slack, even while I feel guilty and often angry at myself for having all these "issues." (autism, I remind myself again) The sleep thing -- yep. Spent many years practically falling asleep during the day, struggling to stay awake at work, etc., then go to bed and can't fall asleep for hours and often wake during the night. The burnout you describe is something I'm all too familiar with, so you're definitely not alone. I'm sure there'll be many comments here agreeing. Just know that we're here for you, even if we're not speaking with you directly; we're here in community, understanding because those of us who are autistic know fully what it's like. Take the best care of yourself that you can, even when that seems hard or maybe even impossible. It'll get better eventually (remember that when it seems out of reach), and you'll be back strong and smiling again. Much love and autistic hugs! ❤
@Purplegoddess777
@Purplegoddess777 10 ай бұрын
Too relatable. Getting the sleep under control is what helped me. I would be awake days at a time. It took months, even with medication, to get enough sleep. I felt like everything started falling into place once I was getting enough restful sleep. Use whatever works for you.
@zeeenno
@zeeenno 10 ай бұрын
Wishing you the best and rest ❤ I’ve noticed quite a few autistic youtubers are in burnout right now. I encourage all of them to be open about it and REST. Take your own advice you graciously give all of us! 🛌
@MomontheSpectrum
@MomontheSpectrum 10 ай бұрын
Thank you for the reminder 💓
@ashanashra
@ashanashra 10 ай бұрын
Tip : Dark Showers. Exactly what it sounds like, a shower in the dark. Use a tea light or night light if its to dark. Long and hot. I've even gone in there with ear plugs and if I am to tired I literally just sit down in there.
@sounddilemma6474
@sounddilemma6474 10 ай бұрын
Take care! I’m also having a burnt out right now after almost a month of >12hr workdays with at most one day off per week… I can’t do anything since this Monday so I cut myself slack and reduced my daily responsibilities to bare minimum… I think I can finally see light at the end of the tunnel. Hope we all get better soon!!!
@jasonthomas208
@jasonthomas208 10 ай бұрын
What you're describing is how I've felt for close to 3 years now. In 2020 during Covid my Mother passed away, I had to nurse her almost entirely alone and it totally wiped me out. I cared for her for 20 years, it meant I was able to stay out of society and keep to myself, it was heaven for me, but the moment she passed and I had to face the world everything has come crashing down. I feel totally numb and void of emotion and don't know how to get through this. I have an autism assessment Monday, I'm hoping they can help! Sorry to make this all about myself, I hope you feel better soon, it's not easy living this way, best wishes. :)
@TeaLaRee
@TeaLaRee 10 ай бұрын
Don't apologize for "making it about yourself ". I notice I do that too but I think it's common for autistic people to share from their perspective predominantly because that's how we operate and I think to NT we come off as self centered when all we want to do is share and connect with others through our experiences...I hope I didn't come off as too direct. I do this too 💗🫂
@consuelonavarrohidalgo5334
@consuelonavarrohidalgo5334 10 ай бұрын
If you get the oficial diagnosis it would be great to get in contactt with a good psychologist too.
@widowswail888
@widowswail888 10 ай бұрын
Your story is the exact same with my current situation. I spent all my life working an informal job so I could have time caring for my mom - she had cancer and passed away in 2021. I am now faced with reality and now I feel like I’m restarting life. I had my first ever job interview last week and that alone took a whole lot from me. I felt a burnout incoming already so that’s why today I’m taking time to not think about job hunt at all and just rest. As you know, transitions are hard so I don’t want to discourage myself from growth. I feel much better already doing things I need to do instead of going back to my “neurotypical/masking” way of thinking and doing. I’m also seeking an assessment. Thank you for sharing your story, so sorry for your loss and best of luck to you❤
@jasonthomas208
@jasonthomas208 9 ай бұрын
Confirmed, I had a positive diagnosis. I'm in the autism family
@hollieverafter
@hollieverafter 10 ай бұрын
Awww! Sorry you're feeling like this, Tay. Sending virtual hugs for a quick restoration of balance.
@josephmartin1540
@josephmartin1540 10 ай бұрын
I can’t get half of a line of an ancient poem out of my head as you speak (so proud that you could DO the video right now), “ Blessed are those who go THROUGH The Valley of Baca (which means weeping, or being unable to weep as the case might just be)… the point is that in the darkest valley when we can’t see anything else, it is through. Not felt it at all many times, but it always ends with it ending and getting out. Fought ALL the things you mentioned and those you didn’t and kept trying to push through for a few years. Then I crashed and burned out. Spent the last two years beginning to recover. It felt like they would find my body curled up in my closet (next to my grey no color wall, non sensory wall) and I’d never live to get outside again. But, I’m through far enough to be much out of the place where I had to cocoon… Didn’t hope to talk about me, just to say “through, thankful, through.”
@H.Michele
@H.Michele 10 ай бұрын
I am so right there with you. Like, 💯 of this. 😞 I didn’t realize you’re a single mom, too. This did help me to feel less alone. Thank you for sharing. I full-time single parent 4 high-needs kids. There’s no time for my needs. I’m struggling on every level. I haven’t had a single day off since May. I barely sleep, my brain is always on high alert and I have too much to do to settle down and relax. I have no friends or family (because I don’t know how to socialize, don’t feel like I fit in anywhere, and don’t have the time or energy). I searched for years to find other autistic mom’s and I’m so grateful for you and your channel. You’re the only resource I’ve found.
@MomontheSpectrum
@MomontheSpectrum 10 ай бұрын
So sorry to hear you feel so weighed down right now. 💞 single mom life is full of non-stop challenges
@sueg2658
@sueg2658 10 ай бұрын
I feel your pain. I would love to lay in one of those chambers filled with warm salt water. Just floating ,no sound, no nothing and everyone leave me alone. I also just watched your video on stimming. And you talked about energy getting stagnant and stuck. And stimming helps that with moving the energy. I feel like this and the stimming video are very important videos. Sending you best wishes that you feel better. Thank you for sharing the raw truth.
@catherinegrace7999
@catherinegrace7999 10 ай бұрын
Saltwater chamber 👍 Would be heaven since I'm stuck for now in apt where I literally can hear the neighbors walking😖
@badraster7909
@badraster7909 10 ай бұрын
This actually did really help me today, thank you Taylor. I am fighting off burnout after traveling and expecting that I could jump back into college and work and be fine -_- The nonstop world around us kind of sucks. I admire you a lot, so hearing this does help reinforce that it’s not my personal failing for getting burned out. I hope you do get some quality rest and feel better soon ❤
@MomontheSpectrum
@MomontheSpectrum 10 ай бұрын
Thanks so much. You’re definitely not alone!
@dimpsthealien333
@dimpsthealien333 10 ай бұрын
I live in burnout. I have my terminal mom to care for, her home, my husband and our home and family, and my chronic pain, depression, anxiety are horrible. So I understand. It's hell. I think it's beyond burnout. Is there a word for this? I wish I could do nothing, but if I stop going, everything will go to sh*t.
@TheCloverAffiliate12
@TheCloverAffiliate12 10 ай бұрын
Hi! Haven't come across a word for that, but may you get the support you need! I know it's difficult to find the energy to look for help and support (much less fathom its existence) when you're in the trenches, but I believe it's out there. Take care in the meantime. Signed, another person who is trying to listen to other people say the same thing.
@lorrigoddardguilbeault
@lorrigoddardguilbeault 10 ай бұрын
It does feel like hell. Similar with caregiving for mother and brother now that my older sisters died. Hugs and I hope you set aside one thing of self care for you a day even if it’s just sitting with a timer and closing your eyes. 🤍🙏🏼🕊️you’re not alone. Lots of love.
@vivianstewart7523
@vivianstewart7523 10 ай бұрын
I think we should come up with a word for it.
@galporgy
@galporgy 10 ай бұрын
The word is hypercapitalism.
@donagaleta
@donagaleta 9 ай бұрын
A big big big hug from Barcelona, I know how you feel ❤️❤️❤️
@briana8058
@briana8058 10 ай бұрын
Right there with ya sister! I wish I had some helpful tips to give, but alas, I am under my weighted blanket looking for advice myself. Take good care Taylor. 🙏Thank your for your vulnerability and for everything you do for us neurodivergent folks.💜
@andreamckerlieluke911
@andreamckerlieluke911 9 ай бұрын
Virtual non-tactile hugs to all of you that are in burnout! ❤️ I have been in and out of it for years and am finally on the other side. It's really meaningful to share this experience, so thank you for being so vulnerable and bringing awareness to the state of autistic burnout.
@buttercxpdraws8101
@buttercxpdraws8101 10 ай бұрын
You really do seem to have way more energy and focus than most of us on the spectrum, honestly I’d be happy if I could be half as productive as you are. Also very impressive product placement, burnout or not, gotta earn those dollar dollar bills lol. Hope you feel better soon ✌️💕🌻
@Truerealism747
@Truerealism747 7 ай бұрын
I've never had any energy from birth from birth I slept 23 hrs a day
@jason-the-fencer
@jason-the-fencer 10 ай бұрын
I feel this so hard. I thought I was managing this current phase of burnout *so well* that I started adding things back into my life and WHOOPS...back in worse burnout.
@MomontheSpectrum
@MomontheSpectrum 10 ай бұрын
Yessss. This is what I was trying to communicate too.
@vivianstewart7523
@vivianstewart7523 10 ай бұрын
Yup. Me too.
@Wonderish
@Wonderish 10 ай бұрын
I’m sorry you’re going through this and I hope you get relief soon ❤❤
@neridafarrer4633
@neridafarrer4633 10 ай бұрын
Also in burnout. Sigh. ADHD side is ridiculously restless and too wired-tired to focus on anything really. Autistic side is head-feels-swollen, front brain side of head is tight and sore and brain fog is so uncomfortable! Most clothes that I own are not comfortable enough and I went for a walk today and I had to take the shoes and socks off at a certain point because uuugh. Im under a way to light blanket, right now and it feels horribly light and annoying so I'm stimming with my feel wiggling and pressing against each other. Two of my younger sons (my two youngest sons who are 25 and nearly 18) both share this phenotype,. They both helped me today. And I gave my oldest son some sound relationship advice ... I'm struggling to get out of the house, Agorophobic, a lit of the time, these days (I am also diagnosed with cptsd) and I battling freeze mode and exhaustion, a lot these days. My 25 year old came over and we went for a walk. 17 year old son was also sweet and helpful. So not a bad day. I drew a picture. I am struggling with having to push myself just to reach out to my children and lately I've surrended to just not pressuring myself and they have come to me. But some days I'm like, I can't wait til my kids are all more sorted and busy so I can relax and not push myself to parent, but, today, it all flowed naturally and they gave me some energy, which is awesome! I have 7 children.
@majickalstar
@majickalstar 10 ай бұрын
Sending love your way Taylor xxx I've spent several days under my weighted blanket, so tired but struggling to get a proper sleep too. I hear ya girl and know you're not alone ❤❤
@JoeJoeTater
@JoeJoeTater 10 ай бұрын
Clicking the bell thing so I get notifications when you're back... (I'm assuming you're going to take a break or at least throttle-down.) I had a really long and overdue burnout recently, and your videos really helped me. I'm sure you'll be at least as compassionate with yourself as you helped me learn to be with myself.
@theflyingcat7707
@theflyingcat7707 10 ай бұрын
Yep yep yep. Energy is sooo low rn over here too and so frustrating there’s too much to do to stop and rest 🙃 but GOOD ON YOU for stopping and resting so you don’t get sick. You’ve really been a beacon for me on this ASD journey, I hope nothing but chill, easeful, and joyous times for you. 💗 also yes I do have heart palps and they have been kicking up the last few weeks after months of none), and poor sleep, waking up when should be sleeping, prob perimenopause to blame as well as all the other things) which yeah.. heart palps supposedly are nbd but anxiety producing none the less. I found a video where you put your hands together, stick thumbs in mouth and blow and it’s supposed to stimulate the vagus nerve and help the heart re-regulate. I did do it and haven’t had more since so maybe it did help idk. Peace to you, I hope you get the deep rest and re-set you need.
@dinabertrand9113
@dinabertrand9113 10 ай бұрын
Thank you so much for this video! I understand exactly what you mean when you say sound hurts your skin. I am 52 years old and I have been trying to explain these feelings for years to people that just don't get it. Take care of yourself! ❤
@SweetStuffOnMonarchLane
@SweetStuffOnMonarchLane 10 ай бұрын
I feel you, I'm burned out too and have needed a SIGNIFICANT time away from work for a long time now. You sound like you've had a lot on your plate lately and need a reset, so don't feel guilty; take care of you. I'm proud of you for being able to do all of that! I think you're stronger than you know. Shut out the world and let your scrambled nerves untangle. It's terrible when you are tired and can't sleep. There's too much to do these days. I just want to be bored and have nothing to do and nothing to think about. I haven't been bored in YEARS. 'Better days ahead' as my gram used to say. I hope that for us both and anyone else struggling. 🙏
@MomontheSpectrum
@MomontheSpectrum 10 ай бұрын
Thank you so much 💕💕💕
@person3952
@person3952 10 ай бұрын
This was helpful to me. I'm selfdiagnosed and at times think maybe I'm not as I never have meltdowns .Whatever things are named don't speak to me but what you are describing here I have quite often. Sleeping, if possible, has been the absolute best help. Surprises me every time how much better I feel after a nap.
@MomontheSpectrum
@MomontheSpectrum 10 ай бұрын
Yesss. A good sleep is worth so much.
@mausandthimble
@mausandthimble 10 ай бұрын
I can absolutely relate to that sensation that everything hurts your skin! Whenever I'm in a state of burnout/overwhelm/depression it feels like my skin has been peeled off or my nerve endings are exposed and every stimulus, both external/physical and internal/emotional, is like dirt touching my exposed flesh or a thousand needles pricking me all over...
@MomontheSpectrum
@MomontheSpectrum 10 ай бұрын
Yesss. 💯
@tammybrown4410
@tammybrown4410 10 ай бұрын
I'm crying because you're speaking for so many of us. I resonate with what you're saying. Rest! Thank you Taylor! 🩷
@ButterfliesQLD
@ButterfliesQLD 10 ай бұрын
Thanks Taylor I'm going thru this exact thing atm 9months of it. I'm over it. My counsellor said rest it's ok take as long as you need. 🧡🦋🧡🦋
@wolfdreams2000
@wolfdreams2000 10 ай бұрын
Taylor, sending you tons of love and healing energy from VT. Take care of you. 💜
@aurafique6662
@aurafique6662 10 ай бұрын
Extremely relatable. I feel like I’ve been going through this for months without being able to get out of it and stay out. Sending all the love, hope you can recover quickly 🫶🏻
@johnzimpelman9018
@johnzimpelman9018 10 ай бұрын
I was taking care of my 90 year old neighbor, she suffers from Alzheimers and Dementia and this went on for over a year. The last four months which ended in July I took care of her everyday despite her verbal assault with suspicion and paranoia and she was argumentative as well. She finally ended up in a wonderful Alzheimers care facility, and I then started feeling unusual. My therapist explained that I too have been battling such an extreme case of burnout. This is the worse that I have experienced and just when I feel like I have reset myself something goes awry and I am back to my burnout. I know it is the worse one as I usually go hiking, I live near a wonderful park with miles of wilderness trail and this is the first year in five years that I deprived myself of this personal pleasure. Right now I am trying to deal with my chronic insomnia. Just taking it day to day now.
@MomontheSpectrum
@MomontheSpectrum 10 ай бұрын
Sending lots of love and healing energy your way. You’re not alone!
@johnzimpelman9018
@johnzimpelman9018 10 ай бұрын
Thank you Taylor, it's an honor to be part of this uniquely special community. I hope you are finding ways to get back to where you were. ❤️
@DavidMcCurley
@DavidMcCurley 10 ай бұрын
Thanks for sharing your experience! Take the time you need to recover. Grateful for your videos.
@somethingtohandle
@somethingtohandle 10 ай бұрын
100% feel you. I wish I could live under my weighted blanket 24/7. Keeping up with calories and hydration has been a struggle. You're doing amazing! Thank you for the video. I've been doubting my own burnout for weeks and this really have my permission to accept the burnout. One thing that had helped with my sleep when I wake up in the middle of the night weird is Yoga Nidra. My yoga teacher says 20 minutes of yoga nidra is like 4 hours of sleep. Give it a try and lemme know how it works for you. Sending you so much love!
@Zidrazia
@Zidrazia 10 ай бұрын
i also wanted to say thank you for posting this, not only is it extremely relatable, but it's one of the only videos i've been actually able to watch. most people talking on yt is hurting my brain right now, but your voice is so calm and in sync with how i'm feeling, i was actually able to watch the whole video
@MomontheSpectrum
@MomontheSpectrum 9 ай бұрын
You're so welcome! and thank you very much for the feedback and your comment
@mikaelangeloh2316
@mikaelangeloh2316 8 ай бұрын
@@MomontheSpectrum This is your best video. I know exactly how you feel. Hang in there!
@jasonelia3268
@jasonelia3268 10 ай бұрын
Your a rockstar you have helped me out sooooo much...
@rebeccacherrier4037
@rebeccacherrier4037 9 ай бұрын
I understand how hard it is to tell yourself to stop and rest. When I get burnt out I start with a 30 minute timeout, I say sorry family but I’m checking out. That usually helps enough to get me through part of the day without feeling like everything is going to hell.
@Tarynbreann
@Tarynbreann 10 ай бұрын
I feel the exact same way right now, so you’re definitely not alone. You actually put into works exactly how I’ve been feeling for the last week or two. 💗
@t.wakkeeauriscollegerotter6384
@t.wakkeeauriscollegerotter6384 10 ай бұрын
Thank you! It's so relatable. I'm on the waiting list for a diagnosis. I myself have no doubts anymore as after watching your channel. And burn out from last May. It's a struggle te keep getting enough rest. Hang on! This video helpt me a lot today to make me feel less alone and to give myself permission to do nothing and cancel plans. Hang in there, you will get out of it! ❤
@MomontheSpectrum
@MomontheSpectrum 10 ай бұрын
Thank you 🙏🏼
@ashanashra
@ashanashra 10 ай бұрын
I describe it as "So uncomfortable its painful"
@annikaa1903
@annikaa1903 10 ай бұрын
I'm sorry to hear that you are in burn out. I remember being highly sensitve to little sounds, I could not relax when hearing soft steps. I had migrene headaches almost every day. It was so awful. I am not in migrene now, and feeling much better. You are in my thoughts and prayers. Many hugs❤
@mortyblink8355
@mortyblink8355 10 ай бұрын
Take your time. God bless you, sister. God is Gracious. Amen
@221522
@221522 10 ай бұрын
I've been feeling very similar lately myself. I don't have an official autism diagnosis, but I have suspected I am autistic for quite sometime now. throughout my entire life I have gone through periodic bouts of what I now think is autistic burnout. I have been told often throughout my life that I "seem depressed" but that is rarely how it feels for me. I don't tend to feel worthless or hopeless, I just feel frustrated that I'm not able to exist as a functioning adult as consistently as other people seem to. I'm single and a self employed gardener, my life is so simple compared to yours, and I relate so strongly to what you said about struggling to keep all the plates spinning. I couldn't imagine having all the extra responsibilities you mentioned. I also really relate to what you said about struggling to eat. I also have chronic digestive condition, IBS is the diagnosis I've been given, but that really feels more of a description of my symptoms than a diagnosis. When I'm in burnout my digestive symptoms tend to really flare up to. There then tends to be a feedback loop between the digestive stuff and the burnout stuff which makes it so difficult to eat properly. I seem to be coming out of my latest bout of burnout now, and what seemed to help was first giving myself permission to rest and withdraw. Once I started to feel able to do more than sit in the dark in my room, I did small things to improve my immediate environment, like clean my room (I used goblin tools as mentioned in a pervious video of yours, very awesome). Then I indulged in something I'm particularly passionate about, specifically writing, and researching social justice issues. I actually used goblin tools for this too. I set tasks of "overthrowing the patriarchy" (good news, estimates suggest this should only take about ten years, I mean I wish it wouldn't take that long, but all things considered ten years isn't bad). I also set the task of "bringing about a communist utopia" (less good news on that front, dissolving the concept of private property alone is estimated to take ten-thousand years, so a bit of a longer term project there). I've actually ended up writing and researching other social issues not directly related to those prompts, but goblin tools certain got the ball rolling. This has been a slow unfolding process over a couple of weeks because, much as you described, I kept pushing myself too hard too quick and ended back at sitting in dark room mode. go slow. give yourself permission to rest and reset. when you feel able take small steps to care for yourself and/or your space, and then finally reenergize by indulging your passions (special interests).
@vivianstewart7523
@vivianstewart7523 10 ай бұрын
I agree. It's not depression. I'm not sad, I just can't function properly.
@stupidsminkle
@stupidsminkle 10 ай бұрын
As someone who has been procrastinating on pretty important tasks for over 4 years now...I feel ya 😅
@catherinegrace7999
@catherinegrace7999 10 ай бұрын
Oh wow ! That's me ...with the guilt. Just learning at 60 that it's not all in my head. As many (mostly family) have said
@BuckeBoo
@BuckeBoo 10 ай бұрын
Been there. Sorry. It sucks. It helps me to remind myself that measurement of self worth is not in productivity. Then I put my weighted blanket on me. My weighted sleep mask. Turn the AC down to 68. NC headphones and space music. Usually that’s enough to fight past the anxiety and I fall asleep. Best of luck. You’re doing what you need to do.
@MomontheSpectrum
@MomontheSpectrum 10 ай бұрын
Thank you 🙏🏼💕
@heatherinde
@heatherinde 10 ай бұрын
Thank you for sharing this and I do feel less alone. I have chronic illness along with my neurodivergence and it’s been worse lately and so I must work so much less and I find it sooooo frustrating. Even if I don’t compare myself to Neurotypical people, there’s so much I want to be doing that is not resting.
@jter2839
@jter2839 10 ай бұрын
For sleep, I take gabapentin in tablet form. I used to wake up so much at night and my galaxy watch even said I never went into deep sleep. Gabapentin makes me sleep so well and deeply it feels like the longest sleep.
@Myta888
@Myta888 10 ай бұрын
I have heart palpitations every day, they increase when I'm dysregulated for sure. Rest lady, I sent this to my wife so she can see more of what I go through. Thank you for this, I'm newly diagnosed and we are still learning what this means for us.
@MomontheSpectrum
@MomontheSpectrum 10 ай бұрын
Thanks for your comment and support
@TemplarKle
@TemplarKle 10 ай бұрын
I have felt this so hard. Take all the time you need to recover, it's never an easy process but we're all here for you.
@MomontheSpectrum
@MomontheSpectrum 10 ай бұрын
Thanks so much for the support I appreciate it
@eyalguz6303
@eyalguz6303 10 ай бұрын
I am on the butt end of a burn out and I know exactly how you feel right now....the sleep, food, sensory issues...all too familiar. I am sorry you feel that way.
@kalieris
@kalieris 10 ай бұрын
I felt your description of sleep issues in my soul.
@a.e5220
@a.e5220 10 ай бұрын
i’m so sorry you’re going through this. we all know how hard it is! I feel lucky to have someone at home constantly reminding me that I don’t operate how other people do and I shouldn’t try. no one needs you right now other than your kids and they love you as you are ❤️ just do nothing!!
@foxyfaith5125
@foxyfaith5125 4 ай бұрын
I'm 48, diagnosed adhd and self diagnosed asd for the last year...just had my first burnout and I'm having a really hard time getting out of it and explaining it to close family...thank you for sharing, it's more helpful than I can explain.. my 5 kids are grown now, I can't even imagine...bless you and please KEEP it up and DO YOU ❤❤❤❤ I get the adhd competing...it's sooooo hard to explain to those who don't have the same... war is the PERFECT analogy...ty for sharing!!!!
@theastrologicalsystem1353
@theastrologicalsystem1353 10 ай бұрын
I know what you mean...I support you so much, and I wish you all the healing and health you can get. Stay strong darling..
@MomontheSpectrum
@MomontheSpectrum 10 ай бұрын
Thank you so much 🙏
@MorganBondelid
@MorganBondelid 9 ай бұрын
@1:20 “My skin is so sensitive that it can hear?” 💯💯💯 You are not alone, this makes *perfect sense.* I call it a sensoryMigraine. My skin can definitely perceive sound and light. It’s exhausting when I have a flare. It sounds like you are really stuck in a state of hypervigilance, i.e., flight. IDK if you have any favorite vagus nerve reset practices- there are lots of KZfaq videos about it. Please give yourself a big safe hug from me. Thank you for your videos, your authenticity, and your information.
@Truerealism747
@Truerealism747 7 ай бұрын
Yeah do you have fybromyalgia to
@deneag.marable1518
@deneag.marable1518 10 ай бұрын
I’m sorry Tay. This DEFINITELY helped me. It put a lot of what I feel into words
@MomontheSpectrum
@MomontheSpectrum 10 ай бұрын
So glad it was helpful to you. Thanks for your comment!
@mick4300
@mick4300 10 ай бұрын
I think burnout comes to me when I haven't been "in touch" with my physical body. Like the connection between by body & the sensory part of my brain needs reconnecting. The business with the outside world has taken priority over attending to my internal world. Have you tried grounding mats? I love them & weighted blankets 🥰 Feel you, rest up & you'll be back at it soon. 🙏 sending love 💛
@jmaessen3531
@jmaessen3531 10 ай бұрын
Thanks for sharing this. Got my professional dx a couple weeks ago. I know we each have unique experiences with this, but ditto on the burnout that's been a long time coming. It's such a deep exhaustion in my bones. I had to take today off work to just do nothing. I'm focused on comfortable clothes, blankets, earplugs, trying to feed myself, walking the dog. It's comforting to see I'm not alone. Thanks again, Taylor 🫶🏻
@clairestephens3179
@clairestephens3179 10 ай бұрын
I've been watching your videos for the past two months and tune in everyday to your channel now This just came up this morning and have to reach out. There is nothing I can say to help as I'm only now discovering at my age that I may be autistic and having my own experiences with chronic burnout I just want you to know I understand how you feel. But know you are helping me so much. Thank you Taylor. ❤
@forrestheise2596
@forrestheise2596 10 ай бұрын
Hope you feel better im also struggling with sensory and a migraine that lasts 3 days and being burnt out and its very stressful awaiting my asd results and im definitely goin through the same as you and Claire thank you guys for the support
@JustMe_OhWell
@JustMe_OhWell 10 ай бұрын
OMG I know exactly what you mean. I can feel sounds in my entire body. Yes I get heart palpitations too. Especially around that time of month or with a lot of stress. Yes thank you so much. I definitely feel less alone. 💚 I play a farm game on my tablet without sound. It helps me focus on something that's not stressful. I hope it helps and I hope you feel better soon.
@MomontheSpectrum
@MomontheSpectrum 10 ай бұрын
Yes that time of the month brings palpitations for me too
@robertnewberry7799
@robertnewberry7799 10 ай бұрын
I know EXACTLY what you need. Get up, go to a local video store, and randomly buy an entire series, if a TV show, and binge watch the whole thing, from beginning to end, without sleeping. And, of course, ice cream. And maybe, popcorn. Then, you will feel better.
@widowswail888
@widowswail888 10 ай бұрын
I feel you so hard on this. I literally got heart palpitations when you talked about it bc…. Idk?? Lol. Also felt hard at not wanting to do things the way allistic people do anymore. I been job hunting and that alone was such a taxing activity bc I’ve never had a formal job before. My brain is telling me to keep going while I’m in the zone, but I felt a burnout incoming so that’s why I’m taking today off. There’s been thoughts telling me to do more and not “waste” my time (by doing “unnecessary” things like resting or making art) but I try my hardest to push those thoughts away and just listen to my true desires. And that is to take time off from the things that are causing me overwhelm. And it’s okay to do that because I’m different from other people and that’s okay. Anyway, I truly hope you get the rest you deserve so you can bounce back stronger than ever. In your own time and conditions of course❤ rooting for you
@bacchira1251
@bacchira1251 10 ай бұрын
Thanks for this real and honest video. I feel so seen, because I have been there. Especially as you said, that you pushed over it before getting the diagnosis. Feeling sick all the time. I did the same. It's so hard to go with the rythm and not doing the old strategies again. Hope you will feel better soon and recover quickly!
@pleaseleavemealoneandgoheal
@pleaseleavemealoneandgoheal 10 ай бұрын
I've been there, almost every week 🙄 The hypersensitivity gets so intense I can't do anything at all, too much awareness. I don't get heart palpitations anymore like I used to, I just have to push myself to rest but not before I wear myself out 😂 Being a single parent is outrageously hard for anyone so it's even harder for those of us on the spectrum.
@Paul_ABC
@Paul_ABC 10 ай бұрын
Very sorry to hear this, do know you're not alone! It's incredibly frustrating and difficult to bear. Total rest is so so difficult. Sending good vibes
@niamhdonnellan7752
@niamhdonnellan7752 10 ай бұрын
Watched hocus pocus last night with my kids instead of cleaning the house and it really really helped to give myself a break! I understand the borderline burnout cycle you’re describing, it’s a tricky thing to navigate, thanks for sharing makes me feel less alone or guilty! ❤
@happyheart223
@happyheart223 6 ай бұрын
Thank you so much for this video. All the best ❤
@JM-mj1lb
@JM-mj1lb 10 ай бұрын
Thank you so much for sharing this Taylor, i feel less alone
@jasonelia3268
@jasonelia3268 10 ай бұрын
Virtual reality changed my life for the better...
@wolfdreams2000
@wolfdreams2000 10 ай бұрын
I usually visit super gorgeous Northern Lights and incredible waterfalls with mine when I need down time.
@jodyboehs4545
@jodyboehs4545 10 ай бұрын
I can do relate. I think I’ve been in burnout lately now that you tell me what it’s like. I’ve just been super depressed and frustrated. Can’t seem to get ahead in life and such!! Love this video! I feel your ‘pain’!!
@MomontheSpectrum
@MomontheSpectrum 10 ай бұрын
Yes when I was younger I didn’t understand these experiences as “burnout” and now it helps me to have new words to describe everything. I move through burnout much differently than depression.
@cammie49
@cammie49 10 ай бұрын
Thanks you! This seems exactly what my daughter is going through! It helps me to know she’s not the only one with so many “weird” things like skin hurting, hungry but can’t eat cuz it’s overwhelming and all the other things you are saying.
@JeremiahKellogg
@JeremiahKellogg 10 ай бұрын
Burnout is awful, but hearing other people's stories and challenges with it is helpful. What you describe is quite similar to how I experience burnout. It's reassuring that other people in the comments feel the same, too. I always worry people think I'm making it up or trying to get out of something, and it's demoralizing and it just makes everything worse. I don't understand why everything has to be so intense and complicated. In any case, special interests usually help me get out of it, but if burnout has settled in deeper than what special interests can touch, I go with weighted blankets and meditation. Sometimes it just helps to hide completely under a blanket for a few hours. Here's hoping your current burnout passes quickly and leaves you feeling better refreshed!
@jenniferarika5121
@jenniferarika5121 10 ай бұрын
I appreciate you sharing this. It helps me put words to what I'm feeling myself right now
@LynneDavisMusic
@LynneDavisMusic 10 ай бұрын
I hope you will take the time you need for yourself, Taylor! Thank you for sharing what you're going through...this was an important addition to your work and a blessing to so many.❤
@noadsplease2737
@noadsplease2737 10 ай бұрын
4 months ago I got bullied and then discarded by my ex for being autistic and that sent me into a PTS episode which triggered burnout and I’ve been there ever since. The only thing I’ve found that helps is CBD, noise cancelling ear buds, and a really good weighted blanket. Thank you for sharing
@erindraper2992
@erindraper2992 10 ай бұрын
Hi Taylor, I’m currently doing exactly as you are. Rest is the only option, but burnout makes effective rest really difficult. We can only do our best. Sending love from my sofa in the UK, to yours.
@MomontheSpectrum
@MomontheSpectrum 10 ай бұрын
🛋️💞
@kingseyes3717
@kingseyes3717 10 ай бұрын
Glad your taking care of yourself! You’re not alone. Hugs.
@whatsuplavren
@whatsuplavren 9 ай бұрын
i'm experiencing the sameeee thing right now!! when you said "my skin is so sensitive it can hear" I FELTTTTT THAT. everything is so overwhelming. just know you're not alone
@almalittle4773
@almalittle4773 10 ай бұрын
I needed to hear this. I've been feeling this way as well and nobody in my life really gets it. I feel validated. Meditation has been helping me. And rest. Lots of rest. Good luck, dear!!! Take care of yourself! ❤❤❤
@Jas-zzz
@Jas-zzz 10 ай бұрын
Yes, yes and yes. Drinking water 🥱🫣🫨🎧😮‍💨.You said it all 😒. Me too sister💖.
@sarahdaviscc
@sarahdaviscc 8 ай бұрын
So much love to you ❤️
@Zidrazia
@Zidrazia 10 ай бұрын
i've never feel so seen, this is exactly how i'm feeling right now. i need to rest but it's so hard to let myself do it
@abigailbrown5940
@abigailbrown5940 9 ай бұрын
Thanks Tay for sharing your vulnerable side. It is so helpful. Sending you every wish for rest and peace to rebuild your tolerance for the world. 💕💕💕
@essiecrossstitch204
@essiecrossstitch204 9 ай бұрын
I have asperge myself and found your channel where you went through the list of what it is to be autistic. I don't fit in the picture like most. I have burnouts constantly and it's a struggle. Best tip I can give you. Be kind to yourself, listen to your body and rest. Beating yourself up or trying to be productive won't help. Like you say it makes it worse. Hope you get better, I wish you the best and love how you educate others that need the relatability
@Ninzip
@Ninzip 10 ай бұрын
Hi Taylor, please keep continuing to take rest. Your tips ARE working. Allow yourself time. Please don´t prioritize the channel, we can handle it. You need to take care of your body. Your body wants time to heal. If you have a hard time having confidence in getting better because it is so slow, please know I am confident for you. You will heal!
@christinamoore3451
@christinamoore3451 9 ай бұрын
❤ thank you for posting this. One of the hardest things I'm dealing with is people not understanding the severity of my sensory issues, especially during burnout. I think this video will help. Your other videos have helped a lot❤ *HUGS*
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