Ork logic: the story is canon because you believe its canon

...So the moral of the story is that Orks are REALLY into LARPing.

“Bang!” “I ain’t ded! I’z a tank!” “Dakka-dakka!” “I’m not dead! The Emperor protects!”

I've also heard a story about orks who were repairing their ship, and died after a group of other orks pointed out they forgot their space suits.

The most important rule of 40k: The setting is grimdark. The stories don’t have to be.

If you are ever scared of an ork raid, just paint yourself purple. They are legally not allowed to see you

-War is fun -Thinks no one gets hurt (Orks don't really understand pain) -Only limited by your creativity Orks are just a playground war game gone too far

“In the grim darkness of the 41st millennium, there is only war...” _”And children’s playground arguments...”_

Once upon a time, an Ork waugh had looted a Leman Russ battletank and used it to harry the imperial lines endlessly. The Human troops poured every heavy weapon they had into that bastard machine, but it would not die. Finally, a lucky guard team hit the engine deck with a missile and the tank ground to a halt. Battle progressed, but at some point, an Ork mek team hauled the wreck away and it appeared less than a few hours later to raise more hell for the guardsmen. It was *impossible!* Even a forgeworld couldn't replace a destroyed engine that rapidly! Yet here it was, looted and as nasty as ever. Fortunately for the beleaguered troops, a detachment of Salamanders arrived and drove back the Orks... And even managed to knock out the tank again by killing the crew. Tech priests immediately swarmed the disabled vehicle to find out what manner of repair the Orks had accomplished so quickly. They opened up the engine deck and were horrified to see a cardboard box covered in crude paint to look like an engine, complete with VROOM VROOM sound effects written on. That had been enough, apparently, for the Orks to drive the tank. The tech priests burned the box and towed the Leman Russ back to base, vowing to never speak of what they saw.

The battle ended with one particularly psychotic imperial guardsman cannonballing between the two forces while screaming “NUKE!!!”, wiping out all those present. According to a roaming band of orc scouts, the explosion could be seen “from miles away.”

I now want a whole written story of a world completely stripped of resources due to war, as Guardsmen and Orks basically pretend-fight with fake guns and tanks and shit

40k has that balance of “Everything Wants you Dead Grimdark” and “Ork Imagination Memes” and it’s a beautiful coexistence.

You missed the part where the commander got in an argument with the orks about how a rock is an anti tank grenade

There's an actual story in the lore that's pretty similar to this: A Space Marine was fighting alone against a bunch of Orks, until the his bolter ammo inevitably ran out. Overrrun, out of desperation he grabbed a gun from one of his fallen foes, but of course shoddy Greenskin craftsmanship made it so the thing inevitably broke when he pulled the trigger, producing only a sad clicking sound. This, hilariously, confused the hell out of the Orks, since from their point of view, 'dat right 'ere looked like a damn propa shoota 'ee wuz usin'! And what do you know, just like that, the gun started firing, because the Orks *believed* that it should.

“GET THE ANTI TANK GUN!!” *guardsman stands up holding four lazguns he tied together The guardsman: BOOOOM!!! The ork tank died

"The Ork race believes that the color Red makes something go fast, and because the Orks believe; they do."

Guardsman: So long as i believe i have ammo i have ammo. Orcs: I am a tank.

Daily reminder that the only reason that the emperor isn't completely dead is because the Orks still think he's alive

There's an ork captain who was allegedly impervious to bullets. Thing is, when he was little he was hit by a small pebble fired from a weak slingshot ,which didn't hurt him at all, but since he could not tell a slingshot from an actual gun, he believed his skin was just bulletproof.

This reminds me of a story I heard. Basically a group of orks were running from a blood Angel dreadnought (you know red) They managed to out run it for a bit cause the dreadnought could only move so fast. It wasn’t until one of them noticed it was a bright red and he was suddenly smashed by the dreadnought moving at 200MPH and the other orks were killed.

40k: "We have the darkest setting anyone could imagine." Also 40k: Orks: "haha Tank made of Orks go "Im a tank."

"I shot you, you're dead!!" "No, I'm not" "You are, I said "Bang!""

Every time I hear this story, some of the details are changed and it slowly gets more meme-y every time. It’s like some Orkish game of Telephone.

This has to be an 'In Universe' story that Guardsmen tell to new Guardsmen.

Space marine: guardsmen how did you destroy the Ork tank? You have no explosives. Guardsman: well sir in all honesty we had no idea what to do. But then Privet Jenkins grabbed a rock, threw it and yelled *grenade!!!* The next thing we know that rock exploded, destroying the ork tank in the process. Space marine: ...Commissar give private Jenkins a promotion immediately!

This 200% needed to be animated. Love it.

me: i’m a tank i’m a tank i’m tank rolls dice bad roll friend: “bang” me: Gork & Mork haz abandon uz boiz

Reminds me of my group playing Wrath and Glory. I was playing a trooper with a plasma gun, my friend was playing a trooper with a melta gun. This Ork mech boss fight happened, made of a vat with bolted on limbs and a literal cannon that shot out goblinoid creatures at us. We couldn't see it until it cane within melee distance because it was painted purple and we failed the roll. I put on my most convincing ork voice and said "Oi! Wot ah you doin blowin mah covah!" And successfully made them believe I was an Ork in a human disguise. Not even a space marine disguise, a normal 6-ft human disguise. The only thing stronger than an ork's power of belief is confidence lol.

Studier of orks here. There are 4 bizarre but absolutely necessary parts to make this happen. You need a brain boy, a mek boy, a pain boy, and a buncha normal boys. The pain boy needs to actively refuse to heal the brain boy. The mek boy needs to be willing to work on the brain boy. The brain boy will big brain logic that since mek boi will operate when pain boi won’t brain boy must be a vehicle. The buncha normal bois are there to watch and amplify the belief

I just like to picture that eventually a guardsmen picked up a pipe, held it on his shoulder and yelled "BOOM!" and the orks just fell over, because they thought it was a missile launcher, or they threw a rock and yelled "Krak out" (Anti-armor grenade).

The fact that Guardsman can leave their Lasgun mags in sunlight or chuck them in a fire and it recharges them is amazing

You missed the story of the ork who went back in time to kill himself again so he could get a copy of his favorite gun 😂😂

We get animations to the stories now? You guys are spoiling us.

Is it weird to say this probably happened somwhere in the 40K Universe and no one in The Imperium likes to talk about it cause of how ridiculously hilarious it was?

All this has taught me is that if Orks ever discuss what space marines look like under their helmets there's going to be some interesting looking space marines 😁😁😁

I have a head cannon related to this. So you know the character, sorta, Sly Marbo? My theory is that he killed an ork boss and lucked into surviving a really bad blow. When he showed back up, the orks thought he was immortal, so they couldn't kill him. When he snuck up on them they thought he was invisible, so they couldn't see him. And now, the very orks that he had hunted over the decades or even centuries are accidentally keeping him alive, or that he actually died but the orks belief manifested a monster that is what they imagine Marbo to be. Either way it's fun to imagine.

Orks thinking they’re a tank will give a whole new meaning to the phrase head canon when they shoot.

Now imagine a battle where all the ork stuff is just living orks holding together. Imagine a Gargant made out of actual orks.

Something ive always wondered... what if you told an ork that white was really just something being every colour at once? Would a white vehicle suddenly become faster because it has some red in it?

This is one of my favorite stories. The one I heard had a single Ork doing that, and he ran over the commander chanting it.

Guardsmen: picks up pipes and rocks, point and throw them while saying "BOOM"

An intense battle in the grim dark future turns into the boys playing pretend in the backyard.

The Imperium of Man fears the day Orks discover Shonen anime

Guards stan on top of each other,"I'm a titan I'm a titan..."

"if an ork wants it to happen, it will happen" -some imperial dude.

How Vietnamese defeated the USAF when they are discovered and outnumered: "ImatankImatankImatankImatank"

I heard this story back in 2015 from somone who became a good friend. This was the first thing they told me about and it was the first time I had ever heard of Warhammer 40k. What a fantastic way to be introduced to this IP and I haven't stopped thanking them.

I didn't know what Warhammer 40k is, I just saw this random animation and clicked it and there's a podcast about it and holy shit what did I stumble upon

So here's my idea right. You get a bunch of orks to play doom and tell them it's an immersive training simulation. It would literally work and you'd have a bunch of orks obsessed with doom who could go toe to toe with the astartes

Please animate the story about commissar yarrick, the man who had his arm cut off by an ork only to kill said ork and take his power klaw as his own. Yarrick is such a legend among orcs, that he is capable of utilizing ork tech because the orks belive he can. They also believe he is immortal and that a mere gaze of his "evil eye" will kill them, so he got himself a biotic laser eye to fit the bill. As far as we know, it can just be a laser pointer but the orks still drop dead because they believe this guy is such a badass legend.

I ran a Dark Heresy game where the players met up with a bunch of orks that were convinced they were Imperial Guard. Eventually they all got drafted into the inquisition. Including the orks I mean guardsmen

I remember Mike from mikeburnfire asking Zach about what would happen if a guardsman painted himself green and screamed waaagh if he got surrounded. I really, *really* fucking hope there’s a story somewhere in the lore about that. I can only imagine what would happen.

What I find hilarious is that this is actually canon. Not this exact story, but in a battle against the orks, a battalion of Dark Angels ran out of ammo, and their captain tried the same thing, making gunfire noises himself, and the orks just kept dying. Whole battalion is now making gun noises like little kids, and the greenskins are dropping like flies.

I'm so glad I found this by accident Orks in 40K are single-handedly the best method actors in any canonical universe they will literally die believing that you have shot them and not just shouted "bang!" their general direction True there acting skills are on another level

Funnily enough this was actually legit a joke from around the time of World War II. Only in that version it's a outnumbered Polish soldier who's run out of ammunition and starts shouting the Polish equivalent of "BANG!" and starts dropping German soldiers until a particularly large and burly German soldier starts marching forward chanting "Tank. Tank. Tank." But it also works in Warhammer 40k because that is legit just how orks roll.

Orks Taking roleplaying to a WHOLE new level

My favourite part of the episode. Love that there’s animations now!

2 of my favorites are from the 3rd edition codex. The marines captured some orks and their trukks. They decided to study the ork tech, and figure out why it worked the way it did. They took 2 trukks, made sure each had the same weight, same build, and same fuel. One was painted red. Guardsmen drive the trukks? They go the same speed. Guardsmen get out of the trukks, and orks are released to drive. The red one suddenly goes faster. In a second experiment, an ork is caged and a marine is field stripping its slugga to figure it out. Opens the thing up to find some bullets, but no mechanisms inside that would allow it to fire. The trigger literally does nothing. The marine reassembles the slugga, points it at the ork, and pulls the trigger. As predicted, nothing happens. Seeing that the gun is harmless, the marine throws the gun to the ork, who points it at the marine and shoots him dead. Ork believes it works, therefore it does. It's also predicted that the belief phenomena keeps the orks from defeating Commisar Yarrick. After his early victories, they believe he is unbeatable, so he is!

" I hit you. " " Nuh-uh, ya' missed. " " Bang. I hit you that time. " " I'z got body arma'. "

This is the exact reason I'm getting into Warhammer 40k

One of my favorite ork stories involes a wing of boomas that were in such a hurry to get into the fight they forgot to load up on fuel. a gretchen loader noticed but actively worked to hide it from the crews for fear of being punished. But the boomas kept flying cause no one told the pilots

What if orks funky accent and troglodyte speak was actually very smart and civil? Tourrk: Squee, does human lazer weaponry make such sounds upon fire? Squee: Im not quite sure my dear friend, better be polite and fall down

I remember this story from when I was in cub scout camp; it had no references to 40k lore, and 40k was in like 2nd edition, so doubt, but it's also perfect, so headcanon accepted

At this point I can’t stop watching this video, I keep coming back to it every now and then

Problem is that more Orks you kill with imaginary bullets less powerful they become as WAAAAGH field is being tinned out.

This is based on a joke story of a soldier in WWII doing the same with a stick, but then a German blowing him up with a bazooka stick.

This is why I love Orks. You can have so much fun and be creative of their story and lore. Gork and Mork are the best too.

I love the ork in the thumbnail going all “get a load of these bozos”.

The most hilarious part is that I can actually see this happening in a battle. 😂

From what i heard it was a group of Astartes that held up their fingers and went DAKKA DAKKA DAKKA and the Orks just keeled over and died

I LOVE the design of this Guardsmen Squad they look Hillarious! Hahaha.

Basically the grimdark version of saying, "I'm wearing magic armor."

This is literally the most epic battle of play pretend ever.

That was probably my favourite part of the Ork episode.

"ImatankImatankImatankImatank" - America, June 6, 1944

Awesome animation as always!

You should probably just make a Warhammer anecdotes episode sometime later when DK is more familiar with the franchise

Achievement Earned: *’There Can Be Miracles, If You Just Believe’* (Props to whoever recognized the lyrics.)

Guardsmen: *Paints themselves in Purple in front of the Orks* Orks: Oi boss! Dose 'umies were 'ere a zecond ago where did dey go?!

I always lose it with the "Im a tank" chant, never gets old

I told my brother this story and he said "imagine if that was an actual faction ability. Just all of your Orks have T8 for the battle" ....Omnissiah save us

It’s like watching two little kids trying to outdo the other in their imaginary war.

the most unbelievable aspect of this story is that a lazgun ran out of ammo

i just bought the Imma Tank Shirt. absolutely love it keep up the amazing work

This is just perfection aahahahaha

I like to think Humans have some level of subtle reality warping likes the Orks do Not as extreme as the Orks but they compensate with their superior technology

allright, id like to see one of this each week or so please.

I've watched this 5-6 times now and I still get a giggle

In the name of my wolf boys WOO WOO WOO more content!

Lol imagine this is how humanity pacifies the orks. Orks go from big mean green bois to over the top larpers

This is a joy everytime I come back to it.

these ork belief stories are always hilarious. my favorites being the captured tank and the one about needing space suits

This is literally how I imagine every podcast

Omg thank you guys so much!! Finally this story can be shared and sound the way it should!!!

Its probably been commented already but i love the story where theres a bunch of orks being chased by space marines and theyre outrunning them only to notice theres a blood angel terminator coming after them. Once they notice, the big bulky terminator starts gaining speed and eventually catches up and kills them because red stuff goes fast

I heard another story that one time when a group of orks were being chased by some space marines, they saw it was a couple Blood Angels chasing them and because the Blood Angels are colored red the space marines went fastah and caught up with the orks and slaughtered them.

I can die happy now seeing this in existence

I love how this story implies that the Orks were actually scared. You don't hear of anyone in the WH40k being scared, whimpering or just being mentally weak for a moment.

What a recommendation into a beautiful channel. Now I'm binging everything.

Thank you for this one