Yesterday, and last week 😊

My ex attempted to contact me after she turned my childhood best friend against me right before he died, so it's more of an underground bunker concrete slab pour. A door would be too easy to get through.

At my last job, which was full of bullies and evil people (truly)- one week ago.

@@Joohee4 it's funny when an infj gets pushed too far at work, and everybody has only seen their normal reserved side, and then when Mount Saint Helens erupts with words that cut worse than a samurai they all stand there like😲😲😲😲😲😲 I shook an entire rack of milk cartons on my boss's head when I was younger in the cooler after he pissed me off and I could see the fear in his eyes lol.

Today

Can I ask what you see as the value we bring? Checking myself here. I see what value I bring, others do not and it gets tiring.

@suemaz9846 Well, just look at wenzes and her big giant heart standing here every week trying to educate us so we could have a better life. We all do that, not on the wenzes scale obviously 😅. That heart includes everything. Also the fact that you ask what value you bring speaks for itself.

So true, as we hear through the grapevine- probably through a flying monkey- how much we are missed and how important we were to the ‘whole’. Very strange actually as they never expressed it, but later-after all they took. Oh well, onward!

@@suemaz9846, I think it is we are like ‘the glue’ that keeps the proverbial balance in a group without controlling or setting rules…. They see us peripherally or across the room and know everything is okay. That’s just my two cents. It’s wierd.

THIS! THIS! THIS! When I tell you now that I understand my value I find that I can be very detached and respect myself by having the courage to walk away from relationships that no longer serve me. Wishing others the best and moving on. I think there's also power in infjs ability to self focus and having a bit of mystery around themselves. However, I know it can make others a bit stir crazy and people tend to want to know MORE the less you share. Hope that makes sense. But this comment is spot on.

Yep. I’ve been stone cold sober all my life and door slammed the last church I was at because of feeling like a second class citizen, my worth was what I did and essentially ignored beyond that. Reassessing fellowship requirements now as an old widower will still take a lot of time.

I don't play baby games.

Maybe the value you saw in people was the ability (or desire. Possibility..) to control and FIX situations in their life. And seeing the plan clear as day as to how they could do things better made you wish they would allow you to LOVE them and HELP them. But in reality we want control because we cannot easily control ourselves. And we want to HELP other people because we feel like failures inside and believe that unless we go WAY above and beyond for people. They will not tolerate us being in their life. And honestly this is sorta true! Any time I have decided to get lazy or burned myself up and became cold and complacent. People turned on my instantly. As soon as I stopped working like a mad man to make myself so useful for others, me being me was too much for them to put up with to keep !e around without them getting TONS out of it for the headache! Bottom line we are socially awkward and socially moronic! Way too intense, selfish in emotional ways, and antagonistic. Fix yourself and stop worrying about everyone else. If your whole life has sucked you have to come to reality and understand that what are the odds? Is it really that YOU are some saint super human and right and it is the rest who can't compete. Or is it the world is similar and we are outcasts because it is US who has the problem..!? 1 vs 7 billion... Hhhmmmm.

If I see a yellow flag, I'm out.

Except a narcissist will knock, you’ll open saying “Hi, you must be a friend! I am so excited! Let me show you around my mind palace!” And then they proceed to compliment your home while defecating all over it and breaking everything you hold dear; leave without saying a word; and then knock all over again to start the process over again. Be careful about who you open your door to, and

and slam that door fast the moment you hear double speak!

Grieving all these people that are still alive is hard indeed

Surely you can take a restraining order on anyone whom you feel emotionally threatened by, too?

Consider getting a Nitecore EDC27 flashlight, emergency mode has either steady or strobe light at 3000 lumens. About $80.00. Four different light settings as well.

I specifically kept this couple away because I sensed predatory toxic activity from them, especially the husband. 4 months keeping them at a distance. Smooth talk and flattery about two things incredibly close to me (my singing voice and speaking hard truths), so I let them in. Then boom! In a week they devalued and discarded me. I let them in again one more time to verify, and yep, they did it again within the span of a month. Door slammed and grey rocked!

Sure, it could be Anyone's 'problem'-- you can't dismiss your own feelings (possibly intuition), or observations that cause mistrust... In your case, the Slam could be something they simply can't explain or accept about themselves... Either you 'outed' something uncomfortable, or there's an impassable Misunderstanding between you. I've tested J twice, and P once, depending on the era in my life. I can admit to flashes of potent bravado in working groups, that really put some people off, but I grew... To your point-- I have noted many infj's among professionals who are 'difficult to work with', and occasionally was so myself! When confronted, I worked on myself, until I understood. Your person sounds Full of Themselves, and doesn't respect Your efforts-- like a Narcissist-- empty without you? They may not Know what else they are, or how the disrespect taints their relationships... an Immature Infj Can be an Asshole, as can a few others. It doesn't matter why the Slam at this point-- in my humble, remote opinion, your person hiding things and not communicating has nothing to do with mbti-- unless to point out that an infp is just as Intuitive, so games won't work-- and you just detected them! Trust yourself-- It's a raw deal to get after so much caring, but to continue will literally drain the brilliance out of You. I hope you can get Free of this person, and flourish Yourself... now.

@@zibbielanham Thank you for your response. I think some of his behaviours are nothing to do with IMBT. He is a NPD for sure. He doesn't respect people very much but pretend. He doesn't have friends, he said I am his only fried and the best. When we were good he said I am an angle, but when I coudn't tolerant him and want to love myself more, he said I am evil. He is easily to put the evil cap to people's head. And, he is very religious, often use God's name, he is a hypocrite.

@@woodwater9882 I must agree with you-- we are all More than our 'type' and I think people taking 'the test' can distort results, based on a grandiose image of themselves. Some people Want to be categorized an infj or p, as if it's a Credential-- to Pretend they're more credible, not to understand. This does Not account for bullying, lying hypocrites. He's likely Faking everything, and knows you Know. You want the Truth, now-- I'm only guessing he's using an infj 'label' to 'justify' his crap, and the Slam is because he's got Nothing Real to answer with. I agree this has nothing to do with mbti. Hang in there-- your spidey senses are working just fine! I hope you find your Own slam, should he try to come back.💕

People with NPD WANT DESPERATELY to be INFJ. They are frauds, charlatans, and they envy the INFJ. Clearest example I have is Satan’s jealousy of God (Father being ENFJ and Son being INFJ). Ezekiel 28 the King of Tyre is described as Satan. Go read it some time. NPD’s are externally so full of themselves but inwardly they are husks of people who without God’s help can never grow into something healthy. INFJ’s have the inherent skills granted by God to slay narcissism if and only if they die to their own pride themselves and radically accept their responsibilities as spiritual healers (and that comes with speaking the truth to the point of the dreaded rejection we fear). God’s Word will not return to Him void. Be brave and say the Truth of the matter. God bless!

I think shoulder length fits nice