Jeff Dye Could Go to Jail for This - This Is Not Happening

Jeff Dye Could Go to Jail for This - This Is Not Happening - Uncensored

Рет қаралды 4,331,056

10 жыл бұрын

Jeff Dye reveals how became the new owner of an NFL Pro Bowl jersey.
The Comedy Central app has full episodes of your favorite shows available now. on.cc.com/1e85GN8

Пікірлер: 1 700

@standup 4 жыл бұрын

Get ready to cringe - watch comedians’ most insane fails from This Is Not Happening here: kzfaq.info/sun/PLD7nPL1U-R5oxn193dgOORoqNx9pE7wSl

@Thuebner1104 4 жыл бұрын

Comedy Central Stand-Up Airy Shaffer was the best host of This Is Not Happening. Y’all done goofed on that. No shade to Woods; he’s good. But Arie was the best.

@DylanDaManiac798 4 жыл бұрын

Soooo.... What ended up happening? This guy going to jail or not?

@charleswarren1901 4 жыл бұрын

I checked that. It's the same thing.

@JeffWarren47 3 жыл бұрын

@@DylanDaManiac798 😀I just started standup and want ur OPINION.Please SUBSCRIBE if u LOL. (Watch the Time Traveler set first) kzfaq.info

@MeatMachine69 3 жыл бұрын

My friend and I put a 20 foot tree on the 50 yard line of our junior high school football field we used post hole diggers so it was in there nice and tight the next day at school the maintenance dudes used a chainsaw to get it down but not before football practice where everyone saw it, we thought we were pretty cool

@IMKINDOFABIGDEAL13 5 жыл бұрын

What a smooth move, while he's pretending to be text fighting his girlfriend he was getting the audio clip ready

@jaylew889 5 жыл бұрын

Wait what? What audio clip, thought he was just pretending to be fighting with his gf and instead was texting his buddy to not come out

@jaylew889 5 жыл бұрын

@@BReatheNoMoReBw2L ahh gotcha, was confused and thought I missed something entirely different. Thanks

@gamingislife3332 4 жыл бұрын

A man of the culture i see

@kumo9993 4 жыл бұрын

@@BReatheNoMoReBw2L If he's prepared this set in advance I'd say there's a high chance he had the audio clip ready to go before he even got on stage XD No one's gonna set up during the middle of their set lol

@darellteague3845 4 жыл бұрын

Didn't catch that. Nice!

@wozzlefozzle 9 жыл бұрын

Would've been better if at the end he takes off his shirt and he's wearing the jersey

@JohnBastardSnow 9 жыл бұрын

***** I was expecting that.

@Randomuser9557 6 жыл бұрын

Callum O'leary i was thinking the same thing.

@playerknownasmousecop 6 жыл бұрын

Odd question but where'd u get the profile pic?

@wozzlefozzle 6 жыл бұрын

Rough Karma got it from a wallpaper i have saved on my computer

@Grassroots_Hegemon 6 жыл бұрын

He said "I still have A jersey" so he'd have plausible deniability, if he showed himself wearing it that's actionable evidence, haha, he's just trying to stay outta jail, he did what he could for us hahaha

@catfishvodka6668 7 жыл бұрын

he should have unbuttoned his shirt revealing the jersey at the end

@MarshBrik 7 жыл бұрын

that would have been amazing

@emoneyg33 6 жыл бұрын

oh yea that would have...

@Potentialaj 6 жыл бұрын

Catfish Vodka yaaaasssss!!!!,

@damondpleasant9086 6 жыл бұрын

Catfish Vodka, that is the best screen name in the world.

@southsidemcconaughey231 6 жыл бұрын

Iwas praying he was wearing it

@brandonbarhydt 7 жыл бұрын

Just realized it was a mirror behind the comics... always thought the audience behind them were just neglected.

@garettdaly3716 7 жыл бұрын

Brandon Barhydt it is a strip club

@pac6010 7 жыл бұрын

No I don't think so because if you watch some performances they turn around and talk to those people. Also if you watch the people in the front row they don't move at the same time the people in the back are moving.

@TCt83067695 7 жыл бұрын

really?

@pac6010 7 жыл бұрын

Yes really. Like for real really.

@TCt83067695 7 жыл бұрын

actually why am i falling for this? are you suggesting he's a vampire? Where's his reflection?

@DigitalJesuit 5 жыл бұрын

BTW... he returned the jersey and paid the money. His statement: "I still have a jersey" is true... just not THAT jersey.

@strikerrey6016 5 жыл бұрын

@@MrMatt713 Lol this needs to be not a reply and at the top.

@jackielinde7568 5 жыл бұрын

He's lucky that two grand is all they asked for. A lot of the bars back east have mob connections... Just saying.

@S501Airborne 5 жыл бұрын

Thanks! I was actually still wondering lol.

@diffcontroversy 4 жыл бұрын

Do we know the timing though? The prank occurred in March 2013. The standup special was uploaded to YT in January 2014, but when was it filmed? Maybe he did still have it at the time.

@whostosay3256 4 жыл бұрын

Fr. Robert Ballecer, SJ I was wondering 👍🏻

@zacharyp7511 6 жыл бұрын

Love the guy that nonchalantly goes “yes” when he says they should steal something lmfao

@ldalfkjahsl 9 жыл бұрын

Just for the record, he did give the jersey back (for the second time) and paid the owner the 2+ grand he was asking for...

@renatheer 4 жыл бұрын

@@yigyog No, he's not. He's a dipsh*t entitled rich kid who thought the consequences were getting too big. He still thinks he's funny and that there is no reason to get upset by stealing something of sentimental value.

@MadeofSpareParts24 4 жыл бұрын

@@renatheer you mad?

@nicholasstuddard2978 4 жыл бұрын

So Vanderjagt got his jersey back, got some great publicity, and now a couple million people think he was a great kicker and not the worst choker in NFL history.

@xadriantajalle8423 4 жыл бұрын

@@renatheer ok boomer

@calla211 4 жыл бұрын

@@xadriantajalle8423 I'm in my late 20s and this comedian sounds like a fucking moron. Doing shit to people who've never done shit to you is pretty much the definition of being an asshole. Don't know why so many people glorify that these days.

@andraignat11 Жыл бұрын

Gotta love that "Yes" to stealing at 2:44, that came from the soul and mind combined

@TheInCreDIblEMaReKU 10 жыл бұрын

"it was just a goof" -Jeff Dye

@wilfbreezy333 3 жыл бұрын

Jeff Daniels: “It was a goof.”

@coach_nomie 3 жыл бұрын

:"D This line cracked me up more than it should have I don't know why LoL

@DannySullivanMusic 2 жыл бұрын

lolll awesome comment

@PerfectNyx 3 жыл бұрын

Thank you for this excellent example of why we do bathroom checks at bars 🤣

@MoeMentos 8 жыл бұрын

Dude sounds EXACTLY like Casey Affleck.

@codyrinehart4678 8 жыл бұрын

Holy shit. he does!

@lylechipperson6972 8 жыл бұрын

+Pharaoh Polystyrene He looks like Mark Normand too

@tituscaesar6960 7 жыл бұрын

Or Paul Rudd aka Antman.

@DystopianApocalypse 7 жыл бұрын

i know right?!? fuckin trippy

@scottashby880 7 жыл бұрын

B. Smith first thing i thought as soon as he spoke

@TheApache101 10 жыл бұрын

The guy in the crowd saying "Yes" at the start of story when he first says we should steal something lol.

@bingbangboom9614 Жыл бұрын

“It’s not funny when you say it like that “ 🤣🤣🤣

@thelastmanonearth2631 4 жыл бұрын

Vanderjagt handled this with class IMO

@cameronmorck8510 3 жыл бұрын

Big time

@jasperbonez2547 Жыл бұрын

What was he gonna do? It is a jersey.

@thisguyoverhere4746 4 жыл бұрын

11:43 - "FUCKEN 2 GRAND!" Dude, I'm right there with you, bruh! 🤣😂🤣😂

@MashCruMusic 10 жыл бұрын

"Return the jersey and give me two grand." haha

@trayvonparker4772 4 жыл бұрын

I’m from Marco Island & know exactly what bar he’s talking about. 😂

@orvil9223 2 жыл бұрын

Really? You mean you know the exact bar? owned by a former professional football player? on an island that is 5 square miles? What are the odds?

@destrym6568 2 жыл бұрын

@@orvil9223 I came here to say that.

@reubenisaac702 22 күн бұрын

Jim Breuer is definitely in the crowd. Very distinctive laugh lol

@artic9993 4 жыл бұрын

1:59 “I didn’t know Peter attended theses shows

@dashoopasctch 3 жыл бұрын

Just going to say that Mike seems like a really chill dude considering this guy stole his jersey and all that he's like yeah you don't want to go to jail you should probably give it back but if you don't well unfortunately you're going to go to jail

@kerley1323 Жыл бұрын

Vandy was fired from coaching middle school soccer shortly before this story. He got mad and choked a student because he made fun of Vandy for missing the playoff kick against the Steelers. Definitely not a chill dude lol

@citizenkiwi5548 4 жыл бұрын

he had the most sad look and twitchy worried look when he's hearing the voicemails

@saxyentertainmentwithstans8915 7 жыл бұрын

Jeff Dye the Prison Guy!

@o0LoveLove0o 5 жыл бұрын

Jeff! Jeff! Jeff! Jeff!

@Darth_Supaku 4 жыл бұрын

Jeff Dye the Prison Guy!

@salacious_modeus. 4 жыл бұрын

*_Vandy’s rules~_*

@limoboy27 3 жыл бұрын

Underrated comment

@thecampfire4877 5 жыл бұрын

Jeff Dye, the Jim Halper of the comedy circuit.

@jackglaser2001 9 жыл бұрын

I'm doing a playlist of all these sets and all I can hear is the drunk guy yelling out "Yea" all the time...wished he was kicked out a long time ago.

@twisteddane 6 жыл бұрын

Yeah, though I did like it when he said: "We should steal something from here" and the guy goes: "Yes".

@acklahh 6 жыл бұрын

Lol that might be Ari 😂

@headcold7250 6 жыл бұрын

Thats the special, tiny, itty-bitty little place where the real world meets KZfaq.

@gonzorafting 5 жыл бұрын

Just watched and didnt notice, but it probably was that jew mudder... God bless 'em

@angrybuffalofan1750 5 жыл бұрын

Jack Glaser it’s all I hear now

@SatanIsSextingMe 9 жыл бұрын

moral of the story: no one in youtube comments can enjoy anything.

@whatif3271 5 жыл бұрын

I mean he did steal something. Idk if we should celebrate stealing someone's possessions with sentimental value

@lolgamez9171 5 жыл бұрын

@@whatif3271 I joke about 9/11, two seconds after hawking died I made goofed on it. It's funny, laugh

@yzertqhbog6597 5 жыл бұрын

yyeah

@malks9537 5 жыл бұрын

I did it for the cat girls I agree

@binaryvoid0101 5 жыл бұрын

Let's just say if he got beat up, he would deserve it. That would be funny too lolol

@KennyMcCormick99 3 жыл бұрын

BY FAR, TOP 5 FAVORITE STORY FROM THIS SERIES!!!

@nickgomez93 8 жыл бұрын

he seems like a cool dude but based on that story i have the deepest feeling in my gut that i would punch him dead in the face on multiple occasions. & he would deserve them

@dustinmercer7258 8 жыл бұрын

+nickgomez93 word.

@sonnygunz9207 8 жыл бұрын

Same. 👌

@juratchet 7 жыл бұрын

Agreed.

@timstadlmueller58 7 жыл бұрын

Sounds about right, great story though.

@SANDSCORCHER 7 жыл бұрын

He came across as quite the weasely, douche, thief to me. Plus I'm with you re the face punching.

@brothermonkey3357 4 жыл бұрын

Good story teller. The end was hilarious

@oddflacko5063 5 жыл бұрын

I accidentally robbed a bank. Got fired from my job. Became an escort for a week. Had a psychiatric evaluation on acid and then converted to Islam. This all happened in the past month. I want to tell my story hahaha.

@ZinSinger 4 жыл бұрын

Lol I want to hear it!

@christinamartinez7972 4 жыл бұрын

I would love to hear your story! 😂💀

@jordanivory6283 4 жыл бұрын

At least yours would be entertaining

@lunarose7914 4 жыл бұрын

Odd flacko I need this story in my life.

@taotaostrong 4 жыл бұрын

I’m sooooo here for it!

@Xpzilla 3 жыл бұрын

This guy looks like less depressed Mark Normand

@KennyMcCormick99 3 жыл бұрын

This is such an amazing story!!!

@Kitcomedy 10 жыл бұрын

the first 7 seconds has the ultimate seinfield cadence

@cherchikatilo3032 5 жыл бұрын

I love this 💩!! My prank was based on karma and irritation: had a coworker that would steal my Mocha from the fridge. 1 day I drank half of it, and put 2 pieces of chocolate laxatives in it. I sat back at the camera station watching my store. He came into the camera station along with my other coworker. Approximately 21 minutes later, he runs to the restroom. This goes on for 3-5 hours. Finally, I say “must of been something you drank.” He realizes I know he’s the thief. He screams @ me that I poisoned him. I smile, look him in the face, and say “I can put whatever I want in my drink. I even write on the drink don’t touch or die. Remember that the next time you even think of touching someone’s drink.” The thievery stopped.

@mymai5859 Жыл бұрын

Careful of tampered foods. It's all in the intent. There have been cases of office workers spiking their food knowing it'd be taken by the office thief. One office thief called Police & the office workers were charged. As long as you can say the laxatives were in your drink for yourself - then all is fine.

@timothyg1986 5 жыл бұрын

I love these vids!

@kevinfiorelli3502 5 жыл бұрын

Still one of my favorites

@Lonestar512 4 жыл бұрын

When I was a dumb kid, I once stole a people baseball player's glove from the dugout and was then smart enough to carry it around after the game while getting autographs. I didn't know whose it was exactly and walked right up to the guy with it. I never did stuff like that so it was outta character. Anyway, the guy was actually really nice about it and just happy to have it back. Nice guy

@sethh8365 6 жыл бұрын

I hope Comedy Central paid him an extra 2k to tell this lmao. 👍🏻👍🏻

@KonstantBillsAivisuals 7 жыл бұрын

got to love these stories....

@thestrawberrydino 7 жыл бұрын

Regardless of what he did was good or bad, this guy is great. The voicemails man.

@HalosouthparkFAN 10 жыл бұрын

That was great but what would have made it 10 times better is if he pulled out the jersey right there or was somehow wearing it

@mikebrown8577 6 жыл бұрын

And then it would have been even better if there was an update at the end saying Dye was convicted and got ass raped in jail. He’s an unfunny entitled douche. The way he acts like everyone else in the story is the asshole is pretty revealing as to how his mind works.

@michaelaradke1987 5 жыл бұрын

@@mikebrown8577 you must be fun at parties

@Deadhammer218 4 жыл бұрын

He returned the jersey with 2,7 grand on top of it - deadspin.com/sadsack-former-nfl-player-punked-twice-by-drunken-comed-1189306363 If he had it, he would definitely wear it.

@jmedina6625 4 жыл бұрын

A stand up act wouldn't count as an admission of guilt as its entertainment, but if he pulled out the jersey he wouldn't have legal deniability

@stephenforrister4992 4 жыл бұрын

@@mikebrown8577 Calm down Mike

@Flynnieo 7 жыл бұрын

dude on the voice mail reminds me of Ricky from trailer park boys

@js-wz7sd 5 жыл бұрын

He is Canadian

@dawgyv72 5 жыл бұрын

"I still have a jersey" was a straight giveaway that he did return it. Kind of killed the whole punchline.

@didgonedoneitfasho1732 5 жыл бұрын

Tuesday has always been the best day of the week. And now its even better.

@VertigoEyes 5 жыл бұрын

When he said "I STILL have a jersey." I audibly went "DDDAAAAAMMMMMMNNNN..."

@rb5959 5 жыл бұрын

I hope he returned the jersey. I am sentimental that way.

@kitkat2702 2 жыл бұрын

This guy makes me think of Chuck if he went into comedy instead of working at the Buy More/FBI for some reason lol

@TheWunshot 6 ай бұрын

Love that show and that's one of the better stories I've heard on it.

@Emilio0587 7 жыл бұрын

He is the type of guy I personally hate, do dumb shit and then self incriminate them self by bragging

@WhoWantsToKnow69 8 ай бұрын

true, but its still a great story

@Ryukushin 10 жыл бұрын

Ok so... a lot of people assume they are lawyers, I guess, because they see this as admissible evidence in a court of law. Sorry but this was setup as a Comedy Story event, and any and all speech is seen as part of an "act" or "bit", regardless of how factual the story is, it is presented as this inflated version of the truth by a Comedian done through his routine/act. The only way they could have truly sue'd him and won would be by paying some costly court fee's that may over exceed the value of the stolen item, or they use the footage they said they had to file suit. But Jeff has verbal evidence "in a voice-mail file which is admissible as evidence" of them lieing about having video footage and threatening against him with legal action with false accusations. So there's a lot to put into consideration but this actual video won't hold up in any court.

@Martybrizzel 10 жыл бұрын

Boooooom knowledge!

@vniguam 10 жыл бұрын

yea he doesn't want to go to jail, so he would check with his lawyers if this would compromise his legal position.

@thewrighttime1 9 жыл бұрын

***** Please get that info out there

@GoGoErrek 9 жыл бұрын

***** He says. The guy's been there. So no. Maybe it works like that where you live. And maybe that's why so manny innocent people gets the death penalty. You f'wad.

@digfire1 9 жыл бұрын

***** claim photoshop

@buckets_of_lead 6 жыл бұрын

The best one of these yet! perfect!

@anthonysproule4293 3 жыл бұрын

Thank you for being a comedian

@austinharper3180 4 жыл бұрын

There's a guy in the audience that laughs like Peter Griffin

@ChinsomanFilms1 10 жыл бұрын

This and Trevor Moore's I'm not going back to mexico are the best ones yet!

@ChazYocom 6 күн бұрын

One of the only times the intro doesn’t ruin the main story I’m impressed.

@fionanicholson1995 2 ай бұрын

Just found you on Jimmy Dore show. Hilarious 😂

@oninoyakamo 5 жыл бұрын

Steal something unique, that has never been sold and it has no recorded value: Win!

@Ludifant Жыл бұрын

I think it´s a crime that this is not even a misdemeanor by police standards. If somebody stole my old shirt, I´d want it back for the DNA alone.

@crownspecialties 4 жыл бұрын

Best one ever!!

@kaylamrock8723 4 жыл бұрын

Lmfao that was great!

@unclejay9205 Жыл бұрын

It's hard to believe this was 8 years ago.

@vindorin 7 жыл бұрын

It's Jerry Seinfeld in Adam Brody's body, holy shit!

@GB-TX Жыл бұрын

Glorious.

@nuggetsonwow 8 жыл бұрын

*I LOVE YOU GUYS*

@paraliberta 9 жыл бұрын

Great story funny shit, keep real Ari love your material and show!

@alanparra2187 10 жыл бұрын

I watched this pretty high and when I sobered up I could not stop the laughing all over again XD

@josedolores6623 4 жыл бұрын

awesome story!

@jasonfirewalker3595 4 жыл бұрын

What does it take to be a Tsung Yugh dancer? A heart of stone, flexable bones, a tiger mom and a thousand yard stare.

@fullbackdive41 5 жыл бұрын

Dude if Pat Mcafee stole that jersey Vanderjagt never would have got it back 😂😂😂

@1bestfriend2u18 Жыл бұрын

Give him back his jersey already. Marco Island was in a major hurricane, it's probably all he has left.

@chaoticnipples3405 4 жыл бұрын

Legend has it he has the jersey still

@georgevargas9563 8 жыл бұрын

Love it

@jcmurie 4 жыл бұрын

He looks and sounds like a combination of Jerry Seinfeld and Zachary Levi

@benjamingregory8012 5 жыл бұрын

Ari is literally trying to get this man arrested lol

@robertschmidt7879 4 жыл бұрын

Booze + "Dude, that's the best idea ever" = the stuff of many, many, many, police reports.

@mpeckenpaugh24 4 жыл бұрын

I remember knowing a kid like that.. oh my God... LOL!! That was awesome!!! Lol!!!!

@bryancloutier5665 10 жыл бұрын

A stand-up comic act doesn't qualify as a confession or testimony in a real court. It's merely entertainment. Come on people, as if he wouldn't consult his attorney...

@Deadhammer218 4 жыл бұрын

He returned the jersey and payed 2 grand anyway

@JeffWarren47 3 жыл бұрын

@@Deadhammer218 😀I just started standup and want ur OPINION.Please SUBSCRIBE if u LOL. (Watch the Time Traveler set first) kzfaq.info

@Knightwingofbludhaven 4 жыл бұрын

Reminds me of Zachery Levi

@ChicaGorilla312 4 жыл бұрын

I watch this video every month faithfully 😂😂😂😂

@chipmunktubetop 4 жыл бұрын

He is a delicious man. I have watched this 8 times. It shows up in suggested videos all the time.

@rockyaqua4382 4 жыл бұрын

As a senior prank we stole about 300 used tires and used them to block the entrance and exit from our high school parking lot. The staff called an assembly and didn't give 2 shits about who did it, they just needed someone to pay to get rid of them because the place we stole them from was like 'we don't give a fuck, have fun'. It was like 10 dollars a tire.

@majorkay24 4 жыл бұрын

Dude kind of sounds like Jerry Seinfeld

@seankeogh2193 4 жыл бұрын

Kinda, sounds alot like Casey Affleck

@JeffWarren47 3 жыл бұрын

@@seankeogh2193 😀I just started standup and want ur OPINION.Please SUBSCRIBE if u LOL. (Watch the Time Traveler set first) kzfaq.info

@whitedevil2 8 жыл бұрын

one of the greatest stories i've ever heard. BOSS

@lakshane957 7 жыл бұрын

awesome!

@VengeanceBG 4 жыл бұрын

That dude is hard to like.

@vibhorgarg5838 6 жыл бұрын

I think he is wearing it right now....😂

@ronnieduhamel4444 5 жыл бұрын

U guys rock 🥃

@AlexAminoff 4 жыл бұрын

It’s been driving me nuts but I finally figured out who hey sounds exactly like: Breckin Meyer

@roym6980 4 жыл бұрын

I would love to smoke a joint with this guy. Lol

@ninaathena9781 4 жыл бұрын

He has beautiful eyes.

@theadag 4 жыл бұрын

peter griffin laughing in the back ground

@blindjoe8300 3 жыл бұрын

What a forgiving dude

@briana656 10 жыл бұрын

Framing things like that isnt cheap.

@JeffWarren47 3 жыл бұрын

@Fancy Boy 😀I just started standup and want ur OPINION.Please SUBSCRIBE if u LOL. (Watch the Time Traveler set first) kzfaq.info

@notatsunderepls 5 жыл бұрын

"I know I'd do WELL in jail..."

@wereswindow_david6484 5 жыл бұрын

fernando sotelo said that your the best and to keep up the good work

@BannedTomb 5 жыл бұрын

Fernando sotelo said thag he likes your video so much and to keep up the good work

@user-js5bo1iw6f 4 жыл бұрын

@@fernandogamingchannel5890 ??

@user-tu3ol6yh8p 4 жыл бұрын

“Act so Mormon about it” lmfao yes

7 жыл бұрын

but since you got what you wanted, which is get some sort of approach by the kicker... then you should give the jersey back. After all, it is a representation of HIS achievements. Don't be selfish

@zegasi1274 7 жыл бұрын

but 2 grands are too much XD

@flea41593 6 жыл бұрын

It's a jersey that will find it's way back to Vanderjagt because everyone knows he has it. 2 grand is a ridiculous amount to ask for, at most he has to pay for the frame, which clearly isn't that much. Unlikely he damaged a jersey that a guy wore in a football game. However, Vanderjagt deserves every bad thing that happens to him. He choked a middle school kid, had the nerve to call out Peyton and Dungy (two hall of famers) while playing the least important position on the field, was a known drunk, threw tantrums all the time, all leading to his nickname "Vanderjerk", a nickname given to him by his own team's fans. He's a douche, so I find enjoyment when people fuck with him.

@mchris63 6 жыл бұрын

The Infidel stfu

@wal-martmaui5518 6 жыл бұрын

It was funny though

@richardduarte9118 5 жыл бұрын

Marría Catchy and now it's a representation of another achievement.