Jeff Sessions Can't Recuse Himself From Stephen's Monologue

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The Late Show with Stephen Colbert

The Late Show with Stephen Colbert

7 жыл бұрын

Trump's Attorney General Jeff Sessions got caught with his hand in the cookie jar. Or perhaps, to invoke a Russian dessert, the Ptichye Moloko jar.
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The Late Show with Stephen Colbert is the premier late night talk show on CBS, airing at 11:35pm EST, streaming online via CBS All Access, and delivered to the International Space Station on a USB drive taped to a weather balloon. Every night, viewers can expect: Comedy, humor, funny moments, witty interviews, celebrities, famous people, movie stars, bits, humorous celebrities doing bits, funny celebs, big group photos of every star from Hollywood, even the reclusive ones, plus also jokes.

Пікірлер: 2 500
@jalyn947
@jalyn947 7 жыл бұрын
I don't get why trump supporters feel the need to support this.
@kiwidreams3
@kiwidreams3 7 жыл бұрын
jalyn jones trump supporters. The ones not getting payments from other country sources believe him because in their hillbilly thinking they stopped a woman being president. Or heaven forbid another black man. I watch so many say they just couldn't vote for a woman, it's just not right. That's trumps base line voters. Clue in hillbilly music please🎶🎶😜😜😜😜😜
@glen6945
@glen6945 7 жыл бұрын
FK OFF
@ladypilliwick8179
@ladypilliwick8179 7 жыл бұрын
jalyn jones. I like the one where he signed an executive order allowing coal dust dumping in rivers and that very night in his speech said he was for environmental clean rivers
@snausages43
@snausages43 7 жыл бұрын
I get their positions to an extent, but they sure picked a moron to represent them.
@PhallicSymbolism
@PhallicSymbolism 7 жыл бұрын
It's not stupidity, per se, a lot of them literally just have to support him. Check out the "Authoritarians" pdf at home.cc.umanitoba.ca/~altemey/
@romanr9883
@romanr9883 7 жыл бұрын
American politics is my favorite reality show here in Germany.
@georgeqiao1464
@georgeqiao1464 7 жыл бұрын
Roman R how do Germans view trump ? German media ?
@romanr9883
@romanr9883 7 жыл бұрын
around 60-70% of germans think trump is completely incompetent. while only around 12% think he's suited as president. also, only 20% of germans think America is a trustworthy partner now. which is a 30-40% dropoff since Obama left office.
@agnosticatheist7529
@agnosticatheist7529 7 жыл бұрын
Here in Canada, we also are watching this absurd nonsense closely. However, I wouldn't call it a 'reality show', but rather a horror movie. Also, the majority of Canadians find Trump to be an incompetent moron too. Around 76% of Canadians think the fool in chief is a complete disaster. Once the Donald is removed from office, one way or the other. America is going to have a lot of bridges to mend with the rest of the world.
@Oreark
@Oreark 7 жыл бұрын
Trudeau really knocked it out of the park at his visit to Drumfland. Just knowing there is a reasonably sane country next door is comforting.
@YourMommah_69
@YourMommah_69 7 жыл бұрын
Roman, what is your source for these numbers?
@xaionik
@xaionik 7 жыл бұрын
Draining the swamp and replacing it with sewage.
@hotboylayne8969
@hotboylayne8969 7 жыл бұрын
DeepSouth jews win the election every time. noone else
@isaiah3787
@isaiah3787 7 жыл бұрын
I think Stephen has the best monologues out of all of the late night hosts
@noblesseoblige6050
@noblesseoblige6050 7 жыл бұрын
Isaiah and John Oliver too
@interviewswithair
@interviewswithair 7 жыл бұрын
Stephen is a pizza lover!
@inublossom
@inublossom 7 жыл бұрын
The AntiCuck yea, and they attempted a relationship, which didn't work. All the meetings of the Obama administration were open the public.... what's your point?
@MsRoadtoRiches
@MsRoadtoRiches 7 жыл бұрын
Do YOU realize that Trump is different from every other President in the history of this nation?
@haruruben
@haruruben 7 жыл бұрын
Howard Johnson: this entire statement is idiotic, you are clearly a graduate of Trump university where the only meaningful skill taught was to lie so much and in such an incoherent fashion that anyone in proximity becomes exhausted trying to go through point by point to illustrate the lies, misrepresentation, misdirection and absurdity.
@jessmanuel540
@jessmanuel540 7 жыл бұрын
Listening to Trump is like listening to a 5 year-old child.
@BeastMortThe
@BeastMortThe 7 жыл бұрын
Jess... You give him too much credit... I always say listening to him is like listening to a 1st grader try and form sentences for the first time. It's really pathetic and sad... this moron is suppose to our Commander and Chief and he's more like Dofus and Nitwit. And what kind of example does he set for kids when he's a bully? It's like all he knows how to do is make fun of people and name call. Not to mention the so called "locker room talk" and the sheer fact he sees woman as an object.
@KerrijaGryphon
@KerrijaGryphon 7 жыл бұрын
So we're listening to Dubya?
@rax816
@rax816 7 жыл бұрын
Hey I think we were all a lot as smarter as 5 year olds than anyone in the 'Trump administation'...
@ChainsawDunDeez
@ChainsawDunDeez 7 жыл бұрын
Jess Manuel ...the difference is.. kids are funny when they talk , because they are learning about the world...Trump is funny when he talks , but has the athority destroy the world...
@therrydicule
@therrydicule 7 жыл бұрын
Jess Manuel 5 years old ask questions and try to figure out the world. Trump is sure about how the world work, but Dunning Kruger...
@ArsenGTS
@ArsenGTS 7 жыл бұрын
Being a Russian in America I feel like I am coming back home ....oh no...my home is coming back to me
@BinShayor
@BinShayor 7 жыл бұрын
ArsenGTS 😂😂😂hahahahahaha.This was the funniest thing i've seen for a long time.
@raphk9599
@raphk9599 7 жыл бұрын
Yup, enter the quintessential American oligarch, Trump.
@ladypilliwick8179
@ladypilliwick8179 7 жыл бұрын
T. Obama historically is ranked 12th. we've had some real losers...their fun to read about
@Rahavin1
@Rahavin1 7 жыл бұрын
In Soviet Russia, house comes home to you.
@KingAlpaca
@KingAlpaca 7 жыл бұрын
LOL
@adamtzsch
@adamtzsch 7 жыл бұрын
As Alec Baldwin said, Trump's always looking for a better word which he can never find. It's great. Great. Really great.
@russianhomecat3313
@russianhomecat3313 7 жыл бұрын
Baldwin is a looser. His Trump is boring. But Melissa is Awesome!
@TomCatFromMA
@TomCatFromMA 7 жыл бұрын
Russian Homecat No more Alec for you!! Loser. (looser. heh heh. ur stooopid :-)
@jimistheman9732
@jimistheman9732 7 жыл бұрын
What are you people talking about? Trump has great words! Fantastic words! The BEST words!
@penguinemperor2077
@penguinemperor2077 7 жыл бұрын
Nobody's ever said better words. They're so great. Great!
@connectedone2343
@connectedone2343 7 жыл бұрын
adamtzsch I wish someone would give him a thesaurus
@maddie9602
@maddie9602 7 жыл бұрын
As an actual member of the US Armed Forces, and the son, grandson, and great-grandson of veterans (Desert Storm, Vietnam, and WWII/Korea respectively), it makes me bristle watching a draft-dodging coward who had the gall to insult a Gold Star family and a war hero who refused to betray his country after years of captivity in Vietnam -- not to mention throwing his subordinates under the bus when he botched a raid in Yemen -- wearing military apparel, pretending like he's one of us. He is not, and never will be. President Bush had the same opportunities to get out of serving as Trump, but he did his duty, not just registering for the draft but volunteering for service. Thus proving the color of his blood.
@donaldstanfield8862
@donaldstanfield8862 7 жыл бұрын
aegideus Trump is a disgrace to the office of Commander in Chief. Respect to your family!
@JaviEngineer
@JaviEngineer 7 жыл бұрын
aegideus Yea, I'm sure you weeped when Obama's Secretary of Navy Ray Mabus left power. I dont think you know about the Constitution or the Military you claim to defend or care about. Its was a good thing Obama wasted your brothers-in-arms lives by letting ISIS retake Ramadi and Mosul.
@iamchillydogg
@iamchillydogg 7 жыл бұрын
aegideus The draft is slavery.
@GoddessFourWinds
@GoddessFourWinds 7 жыл бұрын
aegideus Agreed. People on the Right like to call us Traitors and Un-American when their "Great Leader" is a pussy who can't even remember which foot got him deferments. They'll say and do anything to protect him. They are as disgusting as he is. ~ A Navy Vet
@ianfindlay865
@ianfindlay865 7 жыл бұрын
+Big Hawn Boy, you're classy. Like a fresh turd on a hot sidewalk in the summer.
@charlieni645
@charlieni645 7 жыл бұрын
As someone who only had elementary knowledge about American politics before Trump presidency, I feel I can write a doctorial thesis about it after sitting through this month.
@sirenofsound
@sirenofsound 7 жыл бұрын
倪传历 I agree.
@Eisenarsch
@Eisenarsch 7 жыл бұрын
So no difference to the average american voter...
@captainobvious1415
@captainobvious1415 7 жыл бұрын
Same shit. I know so many names in politics now I feel like I can write a full academic paper on the American condition. It was so bad, I never even knew who Justin Trudeau was before a few weeks ago.
@bmaze944
@bmaze944 7 жыл бұрын
Man, I thought I was the only who felt like this. Everyday I feel like I'm getting my PHD in political science. I'm honestly losing my mind because I feel such an urgency to keep tabs on this presidency.
@stephenhathaway269
@stephenhathaway269 7 жыл бұрын
bmaze94 me too...and I'm not even an American! You people need to fix this shit and be quick about it
@kiwidreams3
@kiwidreams3 7 жыл бұрын
Sessions looks like one of those plantation owners. Freaks me out.
@MondstaubMusik
@MondstaubMusik 7 жыл бұрын
Given his full name, i am quite shure that his great grandfather was a plantation owner. His fight opposing civil rights, i.e. voter supression of blacks and people of colour might stem from a deeply held anger that they have lost their "free labour" for their plantations! Add to that, that he said that he was ok with the KKK until he discovered that they smoke weed and we'r not too far off thinking he's a descendant of a plantaion owner! All the miserable human qualities/beliefs of Session made him a top choice to join agent orange's fascist administration directed by the drunkard Altright Nazi Steve Bannon!
@GreenDragon11
@GreenDragon11 7 жыл бұрын
Dee Jefferies I would not normally state such a thing for the most part, but you are correct! A lot of them do, including their fearful leader!
@GreenDragon11
@GreenDragon11 7 жыл бұрын
Rico Fluor Very well said!
@mohamedabotan9983
@mohamedabotan9983 7 жыл бұрын
I'm glad someone said exactly what I was thinking all along. BTW..he probably still is a plantation owner!
@sierragoldrush7479
@sierragoldrush7479 7 жыл бұрын
Dee Beauregard speaks like one too. Like a whip wielding overseer. Whippin Lil Jody for breakin eggs while he quotes from the bible.
@emanmoba
@emanmoba 7 жыл бұрын
Alec Baldwin was right. He does look for better words and never finds them
@rysun8709
@rysun8709 7 жыл бұрын
He uses his limited words bigly
@Apfelkind4000
@Apfelkind4000 7 жыл бұрын
Why does Trump always prove, that he has the vocabulary of a 9-year-old?
@paulelkin3531
@paulelkin3531 7 жыл бұрын
Dear Bumble Bee, while I accept your comment may be satirical, I feel the need to point out that an average Democrat is capable of writing a complete sentence. While I enjoy the irony you're laying out by claiming that being equal to Republicans is a sign of one's stupidity, I do feel the point would be better made if written in proper English.
@Luinta
@Luinta 7 жыл бұрын
Matteo, it's past your bed time. Stop getting into political trolling and get ready for school. And if you don't know why it was so easy to figure out you're obviously too young to know how procreation works, then don't bother defending it.
@Apfelkind4000
@Apfelkind4000 7 жыл бұрын
I'm German, so I can hardly be a democrat but OK.... Actually I support the conservative party in my country but Trump is just a piece of shit.
@Apfelkind4000
@Apfelkind4000 7 жыл бұрын
Frisky Bottomsuuater Have fun with your poor excuse for a leader. xD
@cinzar9998
@cinzar9998 7 жыл бұрын
Paul Elkin lol you think welfare ppl can write full sentences
@MondstaubMusik
@MondstaubMusik 7 жыл бұрын
Lock him up! Lock him up!Lock him up! Lock him up! Lock him up! Lock him up! Lock him up!
@glen6945
@glen6945 7 жыл бұрын
LOCK THAT DUM -AZZ UP
@Insight77784
@Insight77784 7 жыл бұрын
Rico Fluor lock him up for what!?! trying to save America and in doing so the world? lol!
@KS-nc7mm
@KS-nc7mm 7 жыл бұрын
dtowng420 Perjury, sweetheart. I understand that's a word above your reading level, but he was LYING UNDER OATH.
@basboosa2812
@basboosa2812 7 жыл бұрын
OMG plz tell me ur not serious!
@npr-xq2xd
@npr-xq2xd 7 жыл бұрын
wraithchild G Like K S said above, lying under oath=lock him up
@SeansPiano
@SeansPiano 7 жыл бұрын
Quite a tactic Trump. Campaigned like he was the most straightforward candidate who speaks his mind yet all his people hide their lie so well before Trump was sworn in.
@yeahohright3097
@yeahohright3097 7 жыл бұрын
Yeah, but it was incredibly obvious. What really shocked me is how many people couldn't see through an OBVIOUS, EXAGGERATED con man. I really had to change my perception of people after this election.
@QueenBee-gx4rp
@QueenBee-gx4rp 7 жыл бұрын
yeah oh right It all kind of shakes one's belief in humanity, doesn't it? Sad......🤕
@johnmurph6221
@johnmurph6221 7 жыл бұрын
No one gives a shit what you think. I don't care if Russia was involved, I would rather see the world burn than ever be considered as on your side. Fuck you. Trump 2020.
@jimistheman9732
@jimistheman9732 7 жыл бұрын
@yeah, oh right: You obviously missed the Reagan election. People didn't see through that actor either.
@jimistheman9732
@jimistheman9732 7 жыл бұрын
@John Murph: Thanks for reinforcing what a brainwashed, braindead bunch of buffoons Trump supporters are.
@wickedrocketelvispel
@wickedrocketelvispel 7 жыл бұрын
That Cheeto is so eloquent! "The Navy is great" Really?! That's... the absolute best you could up with?
@Amenti_H
@Amenti_H 7 жыл бұрын
dandanthetaximan All glory to Aquaman!
@nodisalsi
@nodisalsi 7 жыл бұрын
At the hearing, Sessions actually says: "I didn't not have contact with the Russians" ;)
@fidorover
@fidorover 7 жыл бұрын
“It’s like I’m on a ship that’s a place, and that place is in another place. And that place is Shit Creek. Basically, my administration is on a sinking ship that’s sailing through Shit Creek. And as much as the Republicans in Congress keep trying to throw us a life preserver, we’re apparently unable to get out of our own way, and we just keep sinking lower and lower. So low, that even this beautiful cap is about to be covered in the totally disgusting doo doo from Shit Creek. Which is sad, quite frankly, cuz this is a really terrific hat that they gave me, and-” _(gurgling sounds, as he’s now submerged in doo doo)_. - _President Donald J. Trump_
@TheFriendlyTroll
@TheFriendlyTroll 7 жыл бұрын
LOL!
@whatstastyinbusan2229
@whatstastyinbusan2229 7 жыл бұрын
fidorover omgg this really sounds like him!! 😂😂 except, ya know, he can't use full sentences. Also some of those words have too many syllables... like, 3...
@GreenDragon11
@GreenDragon11 7 жыл бұрын
fidorover I cannot recall in my lifetime having ever heard a supposedly grown up person talk so infantile in my life ! Hell kids at the age of 1 and more speak with more of a vocabulary than he does. It is so damn cringe worthy! As far as him & his whole lot. It reminds me so much of that group called Hydra in the second Captain America movie. Normally I would never equate a movie to real life serious issues, but all I can hear is the actor Toby (sorry, can't remember his last name) whose consciousness is in the old computers. He tells them that they are named Hydra because if you chop or get rid of one head, up pops another one. And they have the nerve to say ISIS is the biggest threat to our country! The hypocrisy from him & the administration is staggering! More importantly are the crimes!
@brinjoness3386
@brinjoness3386 7 жыл бұрын
Nailed it well, but you should have repeated a few more of your main words, after you said it i.e. ".....Shit creek (wait a second) Shit creek."
@ninetailedfox579121
@ninetailedfox579121 7 жыл бұрын
nyny_ 68 Come on, Trump's vocabulary is great. And by that I mean "great" is the only word he knows.
@zixelz
@zixelz 7 жыл бұрын
Remember this comment for when Trump gets impeached
@ianschmitt4991
@ianschmitt4991 7 жыл бұрын
Dominic Quick I'll remember how you dipshits are making the tea party crowd seem tame compared to what they did when 0vama got in office
@henrikv8211
@henrikv8211 7 жыл бұрын
Ian Schmitt Somebody give this man a cigar.
@bignizzle6973
@bignizzle6973 7 жыл бұрын
Dominic Quick for what?
@MrZaborskii
@MrZaborskii 7 жыл бұрын
alright. I'll bookmark it or something.
@kaleioking329
@kaleioking329 7 жыл бұрын
Bumble Bee im not gonna say he gonna be impeached but i am 90% sure that trump is a shit president he cares more about his image and his personal gain for him and his family then the people and the country if he was in anyway a decent president he wouldnt mind what the people think of him but how to unite the people and he's done more to divide the country then ever and his supporters arent helping him not even a 100 days in and he pissed off majority of the country
@HighHeelKnight
@HighHeelKnight 7 жыл бұрын
Hooray! Another full monologue!
@HighHeelKnight
@HighHeelKnight 7 жыл бұрын
I don't have television, and the streaming services that I use don't carry CBS programs.
@HighHeelKnight
@HighHeelKnight 7 жыл бұрын
Even if I did have TV (which I plan to get again soon), it is still annoying to have to bounce around to watch a split monologue. We have to guess which one is first. Sit through an advertisement. If we're wrong, then we have to click back, find the actual first part, watch another advertisement, enjoy the beginning of the monologue. Finally, we have to go back to the ending half of the monologue, including watching another advertisement. In fact, there has been at least one occasion that the monologue was split into THREE parts. Three videos means more bouncing back and forth and more ads. Maybe you don't mind that, but I'd rather just watch the whole monologue with ONE advertisement.
@HighHeelKnight
@HighHeelKnight 7 жыл бұрын
POLITICS PEOPLE = Please take your discussions elsewhere. My comment had nothing to with politics. I'm tired of politics being slinged back and forth on my thread. I'm removing the politics reply. Have a good day.
@rr7firefly
@rr7firefly 7 жыл бұрын
+High Heel -- you can copy your initial comment, then delete it and paste it into a new comment. All of the thread that follows will drop away (erased magically), into the hell of nothingness. I know how you feel, mate.
@Nicole-hc7rh
@Nicole-hc7rh 7 жыл бұрын
This show is quality comedy
@k_bsh
@k_bsh 7 жыл бұрын
Not at all. Pretty boring actually since they can't stop talking about Russian collusion without any proof. Just a longwinded monologue read from a prompter. Though I'm sure your confirmation bias spikes like a sugar rush as you sink further into your leftist mind hole.
@parag8833
@parag8833 7 жыл бұрын
So true , if there was any doubt that the left is composed of emotionally stunted ideologues , their muh russians behavior is the smoking gun...........CIA's mockingbird operation rocks !!!
@jimmyburnel7815
@jimmyburnel7815 7 жыл бұрын
N Rozay Yea, Steven is hammering Trump hard. He is a very gifted comedian. He is right up there with Larry David.
@luminatron
@luminatron 4 жыл бұрын
Well, the entirety of America is a comedy. I think the funniest bit has to be their inability to solve the gun violence problem even though they have a very prime example of success in the form of Switzerland. It's hilaaarious. What I personally think is that America doesn't have too many guns. Just too many crappy people. The solution clearly isn't taking away guns, but partial extermination.
@MegaWeirdchild
@MegaWeirdchild 7 жыл бұрын
if you listen carefully he says "i didn't NOT have communications with the Russians"
@KerrieRedgate
@KerrieRedgate 7 жыл бұрын
Human Person Oh, my gosh, you're right! How sneaky is that! If he gets the axe, they can't put him away for perjury! And being the, you know, Attorney General, he'd be aware of that technicality!
@jeffbrunton3291
@jeffbrunton3291 7 жыл бұрын
Human Person - he also had his fingers crossed behind his back so the lie does not count
@aprilyear2011
@aprilyear2011 7 жыл бұрын
Human Person perjury
@ChintamaniHelekar
@ChintamaniHelekar 7 жыл бұрын
if that's the case then he should be charged with double negation,which is a far greater crime!
@TheGeneralDisarray
@TheGeneralDisarray 7 жыл бұрын
Shane Love seem to remember Clinton got impeached for that. Are you suggesting lying a about an extra marital affair is worse than lying about secret meetings with the Russians during an election campaign. Seems to me it's you guys who only care about perjury when it's not your guy.
@sirenofsound
@sirenofsound 7 жыл бұрын
I also love that Stephen's impression of Sessions sounds more and more like Foghorn Leghorn as he goes on. Priceless! 😝
@ruirodtube
@ruirodtube 7 жыл бұрын
"I have recused myself"... except that I advised the President to fire Comey who was investigating the subject for which I recused myself. Is that what recusing means?
@piparitto
@piparitto 7 жыл бұрын
You can see that Stephen has really stepped up his game over the months. GREAT!
@TheMixedBrother
@TheMixedBrother 7 жыл бұрын
The meme has become self aware. It's ascending
@MsLia32
@MsLia32 7 жыл бұрын
Is Frederick Douglass alive?
@Dorian_sapiens
@Dorian_sapiens 7 жыл бұрын
MsLia32, he is alive! He has like 30 twitter accounts.
@jimistheman9732
@jimistheman9732 7 жыл бұрын
Sessions met with the ambassador; Trump's son-in-law and Flynn met with him at TRUMP TOWER, this smells to high heaven - and there's no way Trump wasn't aware. You'd have to be an idiot (or a Trump lover, same thing) to buy that story.
@TomCatFromMA
@TomCatFromMA 7 жыл бұрын
That's funny lol :-D.
@jimistheman9732
@jimistheman9732 7 жыл бұрын
@ Dr. It: Embezzlement happens too, and sometimes they get away with it. When we find it, we still chase it and prosecute it to the full extent of the law. Thanks for playing.
@Broockle
@Broockle 7 жыл бұрын
Can't that navy do us all a service and just take off with the President on board? Those things are nuclear powered right? They could keep him out there for years.
@shotbyjesse70
@shotbyjesse70 7 жыл бұрын
haha, you should sell that to stephen
@ellea3344
@ellea3344 7 жыл бұрын
10 years to be exact
@martiemc8398
@martiemc8398 7 жыл бұрын
Broockle or throw him overboard😀😁😘
@3xclusiv3sodak
@3xclusiv3sodak 7 жыл бұрын
Mae Dae Elron Hoyabembe
@tamcon72
@tamcon72 7 жыл бұрын
This would be a fantastic movie starring Gerard Depardieu in the megalomaniacal, democratically elected dictator role. Well, maybe not fantastic, but good for a chuckle.
@scottspa74
@scottspa74 7 жыл бұрын
damn. Stephen Colbert, you are pretty much the best of a generation.
@cynthiamartin1631
@cynthiamartin1631 7 жыл бұрын
Don't hold back!! All soooo true. Thank God someone is still expressing those of us who have a halfway decent understanding of law, ethics and respect of the circumstances of all people.
@KerrieRedgate
@KerrieRedgate 7 жыл бұрын
This "American White House" show is so entertaining. The daily episodes just get better and better. What a script! This is even more suspenseful than "The West Wing". Future generations will watch all the news coverage of Trump & co as a "TV" (or whatever it will be then) series, and will laugh at anyone who tries to tell them it was real. I can't wait for the final instalments when Trump & Bannon & co will be voted off the island and peace reigns on Earth.
@infinidominion
@infinidominion 7 жыл бұрын
i've been saying future generations will laugh at this era for a few years now. what I hope tho, is that is doesnt get real fuckin dark before it gets light again.
@thereaper2615
@thereaper2615 7 жыл бұрын
Christopher Rowe Stock up more Flashlight and batteries, its going to be Pitch Black soon.
@rakoczi29
@rakoczi29 7 жыл бұрын
actually quite fascinating the whole shit show that is; also very unpredictable, for there could be so many different scenarios, depending of course upon how far the investigations & lawsuits may take us, as well; why would the folks who possess all the evidence to get rid of him give up on the daily surprises, horse crap, ignorance & outright stupidity on constant display, when most of us are looking forward to our daily dosage of outstanding laughter ...
@martiemc8398
@martiemc8398 7 жыл бұрын
Kerrie Redgate I know you meant this as tongue-in-cheek but the truth is I'm terrified. first of all the embarrassment in front of the world of this man and then an impeachment. Which will take our taxpayer money away from the Urgent needs of our country. and worst of all: What if they get away with all this?
@rakoczi29
@rakoczi29 7 жыл бұрын
marta, believe me, they will .........
@odesa86
@odesa86 7 жыл бұрын
He turned off the flashlight !!! Brilliant.
@taidghdecarne8155
@taidghdecarne8155 7 жыл бұрын
As Alec Baldwin said "his thesaurus is the size of a pamphlet" 😂
@aaaagggghhhh6370
@aaaagggghhhh6370 7 жыл бұрын
show your taxes trump you traitor !!!
@bignizzle6973
@bignizzle6973 7 жыл бұрын
david hunter why?
@AlphaGen07
@AlphaGen07 7 жыл бұрын
Big Nizzle because he said he would and almost every recent president has done so. It proves you have no ties to foreign entities
@lln7065
@lln7065 7 жыл бұрын
DARKsmile 09 He said he would once Klinton shows her emails. Didn't do that, now did she?
@dee.f88
@dee.f88 7 жыл бұрын
Swang is better than Black Beatles no she didn't release the emails lol.....she did the opposite by deleting all 60k of them
@jakemachine2686
@jakemachine2686 7 жыл бұрын
david hunter why ? the clintons have yet to release the tax returns from the Clinton Foundation. i don't give two shits about Trumps returns. i do care about the money that Hillary took from Saudi Arabia. the $10 billion that she embezzeled from the haiti relief fund in 2011.
@RishabhKumar-hq9dc
@RishabhKumar-hq9dc 7 жыл бұрын
Stephen is just the best at improv. Every time he uses imaginary props he puts them away afterwards or switches them off. It really adds to his monlogue
@flynnfoley7294
@flynnfoley7294 7 жыл бұрын
NO STEPHEN! Seth Myers did the same "not as your husband joke"! Dammit man, I was rooting for you.
@zainshanqiti4117
@zainshanqiti4117 7 жыл бұрын
Colbert is actually on before Meyers is, but its just that late night edits their videos quicker. Which means technically, Stephen still did that joke first ;)
@samechaos3297
@samechaos3297 7 жыл бұрын
Well, Stephen's show goes before Seth's. So you can give the credit to him
@flynnfoley7294
@flynnfoley7294 7 жыл бұрын
Zain Shanqiti phew, in that case, everything's okay now.
@flynnfoley7294
@flynnfoley7294 7 жыл бұрын
same chaos don't get me wrong, I like Seth Meyers. But Stephen Colbert does everything better.
@samechaos3297
@samechaos3297 7 жыл бұрын
Yeah, I agree with you at most
@sirierieott5882
@sirierieott5882 7 жыл бұрын
From the UK - Stephen's week day analysis is 'THE BEST, IT'S GREAT, WHO KNEW COMEDY COULD BE THIS FUNNY, THE JOKES ARE WINNING!!!
@eugene188
@eugene188 7 жыл бұрын
holy crap. is his vocab really that lacking??
@keith1984rich
@keith1984rich 7 жыл бұрын
Bumble Bee Yeah ok bruh meanwhile Trump and company have the most corrupt administration since Nixon.
@eod696
@eod696 7 жыл бұрын
Is you're spelling really so bad that you don't realize there are a couple other syllables there? It's VO-CAB-U-LARY, genius...beyond that, you're really thinking of vernacular, not vocabulary. Trump tries to present himself as a common-person. That's part of his populist strategy. He doesn't want to appear smarter, or better, or bigger, or stronger than the average Joe, so his speeches are worded simply to appeal to simple people in simple ways...but, being the phenomenal genius that you are, surely you understood what he was saying as well...surely...
@RezidentSadist
@RezidentSadist 7 жыл бұрын
eod696 vocab is short for vocabulary, genius. Calm the fuck down.
@DittyWolf
@DittyWolf 7 жыл бұрын
I don't know if you've listened to his speeches but it's not that he's wording them simple so it's easy for people to understand he's wording them like that because he's not able to form anything more complicated than that. Also, if his speeches are made for the average person to understand then the average person is extremely illiterate.
@MrAshePeters
@MrAshePeters 7 жыл бұрын
Is your* spelling really so bad. "You're" implies 'you are,' "your" implies that you possess something, for example; your shoes, your socks, or your coat. You got the second one right though, (you're really thinking of vernacular = you ARE really thinking....) You also don't need a hyphen between the words common and man. Use hyphens when you have two words that describe one object. For example; Trump is a good-hearted man, Trump is a bad-vocabulary-having loser, my friend Dave is a kick-ass guy. This may come off as trolling but I'm actually not even trying to be a dick, so Ill apologize in advance for being a punctuation nazi, but thought it may help you some in the future if you can remember it. That way you can call people out more effectively.
@rabbitcarrot651
@rabbitcarrot651 7 жыл бұрын
Always like it when they don't break up the monologue!
@roberthrodebert9263
@roberthrodebert9263 7 жыл бұрын
45 is so eloquent. He really expresses his creativity in his choice of words.
@briestoll
@briestoll 7 жыл бұрын
If trump couldn't use the words great, tremendous, huge or beautiful, he would barely have words.
@fredmoor5099
@fredmoor5099 7 жыл бұрын
..... Who is waiting for trumps visitations with Russian intermediaries to surface yet, as I am, with glee ?
@jnettlopez
@jnettlopez 7 жыл бұрын
❤ great monologue really enjoyed it
@GenghisKhanPolitics
@GenghisKhanPolitics 7 жыл бұрын
"Our navy is great... Great." The guys is fuckin' Shakespeare.
@schmoab
@schmoab 7 жыл бұрын
Sessions didn't even answer the question he was asked because he was so prepared to answer a slightly different one. This is a telltale sign of a liar.
@cindyoser9988
@cindyoser9988 7 жыл бұрын
Love it! "Check the front of the Constitution too. " Yes, Donny, we have rights. Guess you didn't read our Constitution did you?
@AnandTumurtogoo17
@AnandTumurtogoo17 7 жыл бұрын
I have never seen Colbert go this savage on anyone except Trump. He must really dislike him.
@Asama7
@Asama7 7 жыл бұрын
I love how Stephen takes his mime seriously he got out of the bathtub and put the toaster back and then later he turn off the flashlight
@SabaDhutt
@SabaDhutt 7 жыл бұрын
This man is a national treasure! Highly intelligent and fucking fearless! And his comedy, oftentimes improvised...wow
@ericwaraujo
@ericwaraujo 7 жыл бұрын
this time is turning out to become a wonderful display of the American institutions. All should be indeed proud of the efficacy of the first ammendment when it's needed the most. Congratulations!!! and Stephen. Damn man!
@iceverything2000
@iceverything2000 7 жыл бұрын
This is the second time ive heard the same joke from Colbert and Meyers.
@darknightrises7283
@darknightrises7283 7 жыл бұрын
check the front side of the constitution ... XD XD XD Too good ..
@h1taoufik
@h1taoufik 7 жыл бұрын
I like how Stephen always puts back his imaginary props.
@Ingretto
@Ingretto 7 жыл бұрын
All the mime-ing in this monologue made all the jokes even better
@RoadCaptainEntertain
@RoadCaptainEntertain 7 жыл бұрын
Is there anyone in this administration who has figured out how to wipe without getting it all over themselves?
@lenypainchaud3966
@lenypainchaud3966 7 жыл бұрын
I'm canadian and i'm soo happy that Stephen Colbert can bring some laugh in this grim world bring by this Trumendously bad administration
@phillipmitchell9699
@phillipmitchell9699 7 жыл бұрын
Senator Al Franken has lost it. He seemed to think he was back on Saturday Night Live. He asks a simple question and expects to get the TRUTH!!??? Come on!
@msaifhussaain
@msaifhussaain 7 жыл бұрын
I didnt know what late night talk shows were 2 months ago. But Now i seem to enjoy it with entertainers as Stephen Colbert, Seth Myers, John Oliver, Trevor Noah hosting these show. I don't watch the news anymore as this is already filling my leisure time. Thank you Mr.POTUS.
@ravenmarine2015
@ravenmarine2015 7 жыл бұрын
he has the words , the best words XD
@muazqamar
@muazqamar 7 жыл бұрын
FINALLY!!!! Someone addressed his vocabulary!!! Whenever Trump speaks it's like he never got past the 3rd grade
@marshamariner7897
@marshamariner7897 2 жыл бұрын
He didn't really
@zomcom11
@zomcom11 7 жыл бұрын
The part that shows he knows he's guilty of something is because he didn't even need to bring up his treason when asked the question.
@neitherworld
@neitherworld 7 жыл бұрын
Finally! Thank you for uploading the whole monologue instead of splitting it up.
@RoloHolland
@RoloHolland 7 жыл бұрын
I love that trump is chosen as president . We are gonna have so much laughs the next 4 years
@ZeInfidel
@ZeInfidel 7 жыл бұрын
This was great. Stephen was great.Great.......
@cerboris521
@cerboris521 7 жыл бұрын
Every time he opens his mouth it's an embarrassment to America. Who would have think the US didn't get enough from George W.
@danielsilvers2896
@danielsilvers2896 7 жыл бұрын
Impeach. Remove. Prosecute. Imprison.
@matthewgriffin7857
@matthewgriffin7857 7 жыл бұрын
this isn't funny anymore. it's disturbing that this kind of treason is real
@RustinChole
@RustinChole 7 жыл бұрын
His trump impression is getting better.
@Yves_Ka
@Yves_Ka 7 жыл бұрын
More corruption, scandal and drama in 1 month than a whole season of House of Cards
@cygnus_XI
@cygnus_XI 7 жыл бұрын
I died when Jon started playing "Row Row Row your Boat".
@alexhutcheson8467
@alexhutcheson8467 7 жыл бұрын
Turning adblock off again now that the monologue is in one piece
@dtaleghani
@dtaleghani 7 жыл бұрын
Again, show your taxes agent orange.
@petragnani51
@petragnani51 7 жыл бұрын
Sessions answer to Al Franken sounded like Capt. Willard in Apocalypse Now: "Sir, I am unaware of any such activity or operation... nor would I be disposed to discuss such an operation if it did in fact exist, Sir."
@calvinchann1996
@calvinchann1996 7 жыл бұрын
Forrest Trump springs to mind, but that'd be insulting to Gump.
@theajdisplay
@theajdisplay 7 жыл бұрын
Damn, I love this dude, Stephen Colbert!
@DJ-zp8hw
@DJ-zp8hw 7 жыл бұрын
Yes, full monologue! :D
@cortgreene885
@cortgreene885 7 жыл бұрын
Lock them up, lock them up, lock them up...Trump, Sessions, Flynn et al!
@aliservan7188
@aliservan7188 7 жыл бұрын
I never, ever thought I'd see an American president more ludicrous than W Bush. How wrong can a man be? O_o
@LuminousLilith
@LuminousLilith 7 жыл бұрын
This is funny as hell 🤣...until you realize you live in the U.S. 😭
@ConnieBTV
@ConnieBTV 7 жыл бұрын
Stephen is the best! But we already know all the Trump people will say it's #fakenews 😂😂😂
@jaydavids6485
@jaydavids6485 7 жыл бұрын
Good job America! Take this straw house apart...one corrupt stick at a time😁😁😁
@timopheim5479
@timopheim5479 7 жыл бұрын
Did the writers even watch the AG's press conference? He claims he had no part in Russian hacking but discussed terrorism and Ukraine with the Russian ambassador, among another things he can't recall.
@CoachingHigher
@CoachingHigher 7 жыл бұрын
Kate McKinnon is gonna nail it on Saturday!
@mukupa3005
@mukupa3005 7 жыл бұрын
You just have to love the USA,everything looks like they are acting,the sessions guy looks like his an actor of himself and some more human version of himself will pop out of his skin woooooh
@user-vf3cb7vk8z
@user-vf3cb7vk8z 7 жыл бұрын
Barbarita Chanda Politicians always act, the US isn't uniqe in that.
@jmtnvalley
@jmtnvalley 7 жыл бұрын
Well, as a former naval officer, I find our president's words to the crew of the Ford so encouraging. Uh huh. Sure. Tulsi Gabbard for president.
@BillBenzon
@BillBenzon 7 жыл бұрын
America's greatness is the greatest greatness the world has ever seen. Really fantastically great.
@altilama
@altilama 7 жыл бұрын
2:45 seth did the same joke
@ApocalypseLater8
@ApocalypseLater8 7 жыл бұрын
Lama Moha. They're a 5 min. walk from each other, maybe they did some joke swapping, heyuk-heyuk.
@MisMediator
@MisMediator 7 жыл бұрын
Lama Moha. they always do the same joke, including Trevor Noah. I watch all 3 of these shows. either they have the same writers or they just think alike.
@Ruya007
@Ruya007 7 жыл бұрын
Its such a good joke tho. lol
@randydodd4613
@randydodd4613 7 жыл бұрын
good show
@TroyRudd
@TroyRudd 7 жыл бұрын
This is................ GREAT!
@darknightsylu
@darknightsylu 7 жыл бұрын
And you call yourself a Jeff. You cannot fathom how disappointed the league of extraordinary Jeffs (or Geoffs) will be.
@MarenAnne66
@MarenAnne66 7 жыл бұрын
As someone who is only recently getting into politics, can someone explain to me why it's so disconcerting that our leaders are communicating with Russia? People seemed really concerned about it, but I've never heard why.
@pat308
@pat308 7 жыл бұрын
MarenAnne66 people like steven colbert and much of the main stream media hate Trump and his agenda, and will stop at nothing to shut him down. If you do your own research on the specifics of this episode you'd find out that this is indeed like you thought over nothing. They have not found any evidence of a Russian collusion, how long have they been screaming the "Russians the Russians", yet even still there is still nothing. If there was Trump would have surely been impeached by now. To give an example, the media will say "someone on the Trump team had a meeting with some Russians, and try and make it sound bad even though it is normal and standard to have theses meetings. the media trys to make the meeting seem bad and scary. It is fear mongering and alot of people are waking up to this bull shit. check out the sub Reddit the_donald to learn more, but also explore a great variety of sources too. .. steven is a lier and a shill and should be ashamed of himself, his words and actions are treacherous. also notice that the commenters on stevens video's, for the most part are bleating sheep, they like to hear what they want to. and anything that contradicts their beliefs get aggressively shot down, they don't want to have a conservation, if you don't agree with their narrative you are bad and evil and don't have the moral high ground. furthermore most people here and in general don't even understand what this battle is even about it's sad and im really worried that all the liberalism will literally ruin America, maybe even the world.
@simoncarlile5190
@simoncarlile5190 7 жыл бұрын
Because they communicated with Russia more than they communicated with all of America's allies combined. It's not even necessarily a smoking gun; maybe MAYBE all of their meetings and contacts were harmless. But the big red flag is the extent the administration is covering up this Russian problem. Flynn would still be national security advisor right now if someone hadn't leaked his connections to Russia. If Trump and his staff had their way, not only would no one be talking about this Russia story, but no one _would have any idea that there's a potential for a story_. That's very suspicious. Governments don't tend to hide shit like that if it's on the up-and-up.
@Kang5030
@Kang5030 7 жыл бұрын
As of now, you've had two other replies to your comment. One was a long-winded ideological meltdown complete with "liberalism will LITERALLY ruin America, maybe even the world.", because those damn liberals must be the source of all worldly evil and anyone who opposes them are righteous crusaders for the common good. Anyone who disagrees with that isn't a human being with a different viewpoint, but a sheep to be ridiculed and slaughtered. The other is a fairly sane and rational explanation that red flags in government communication and foreign influence in our country should always be treated seriously, especially if foreign powers are actively meddling in our electoral process. Piece after piece of evidence is turning up, and it might mean our own system of government is compromised. I think you can make up your own mind about this.
@zxKAOS1
@zxKAOS1 7 жыл бұрын
Eh.. that's the internet for you. During the presidential campaigns, they kept droning on, and on, and on, about how Obama was a Muslim even though it was proven to be not true, how Hillary's Benghazi issue was resolved, and how there was nothing to report on Clinton's email servers. Yet, because the news said it enough times, the public seemed to be transformed into sheep as well.
@lln7065
@lln7065 7 жыл бұрын
zxKAOS1 Hillary lied about Benghazi, which is proven, and she did break multiple laws with her private email server and classified emails being sent to unclassified individuals. She was protected by the complicit and corrupt FBI.
@DODGECHARGER-vv7sg
@DODGECHARGER-vv7sg 7 жыл бұрын
The Trump show! Making this show great again! Should be thanking our great president!
@trevzns
@trevzns 7 жыл бұрын
A questionnaire from Vermont Senator Patrick Leahy, a Democratic member of the Judiciary Committee, asked Sessions whether he had “been in contact with anyone connected to any part of the Russian government about the 2016 election, either before or after election day.” Sessions answered “no.”
@joeyconservative
@joeyconservative 7 жыл бұрын
When Colbert win his next Emmy, he should thank Comrade Trump
@mikewazikaze2394
@mikewazikaze2394 7 жыл бұрын
Trump said this, Trump did that. Same show. Everyday. Lame.
@aprilyear2011
@aprilyear2011 7 жыл бұрын
Mike Wazikaze right?! Trump needs to stop pretending he can do this and quit before something really bad happens.
@xxArcanexx
@xxArcanexx 7 жыл бұрын
If you watched this and you thought it was funny, You MIGHT be a LEFTEST.
@AlecBaldwin5816
@AlecBaldwin5816 7 жыл бұрын
they are butt hurt libtards.
@BNakaFurious
@BNakaFurious 7 жыл бұрын
i'm not even a leftist i don't even care about about left or right politics but i do have a sense of humor
@RobertGuilman
@RobertGuilman 7 жыл бұрын
xxArcanexx centrist here and i find it funny
@luxing7694
@luxing7694 7 жыл бұрын
xxArcanexx Your grammar really shows your intelligence...
@TheMrVengeance
@TheMrVengeance 7 жыл бұрын
And if you're utterly incapable of correctly spelling the word 'leftist', you might be a Trump supporter.
@everburningblue
@everburningblue 7 жыл бұрын
"I didn't not have communications with the Russians." Did you catch that? The double negative? He didn't lie at all! Stop berating Trump! *goes and cries in the corner*
@peterbailey5994
@peterbailey5994 7 жыл бұрын
Sessions didn't even answer Franken's question. WTF? Sessions defensive reaction is what forensic psychologists call a sure sign of guilt.
@FriedrichHerschel
@FriedrichHerschel 7 жыл бұрын
So, apparently the Navy is already great again. Just send Trump through the country and let him do his speeches, and you're great again in no time. Trump said so, and he never lies!
@nidodson
@nidodson 7 жыл бұрын
The subtlety of the sinking hotel comment was beautiful. Well played good sir, well played.
@marley6823
@marley6823 7 жыл бұрын
Donald Drumpf: "I know big words like, Great."
@RandallStephens397
@RandallStephens397 7 жыл бұрын
When the president isn't following a script, he looks like he doesn't even know where he is or what he's doing. Someone should get this man to a hospital.
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