John Mulaney always looks like an innocent 1950s time-traveller and then he comes out with sentences like "I started smoking age 13"

John Mulaney is my favorite asian-american woman.

"Yeah the kids don't wanna work either" "GOOD." *drinks air wine*

John Mulaney has never more looked like a kid wearing an adult suit than on this show

One of my friends said to me recently, "I can't out-drink my wife. She was a schoolteacher in Louisiana." It all makes sense now!

Best way to make plans is to silently hope the other person cancels.

He’s been smoking since 13? How does he still have such baby-clear skin?

February 2020: Cancelling plans is like heroin March 2020: Ahh another nice relaxing evening at home April 2020: PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD LET ME DO SOMETHING Edit November 2020: this comment isn't even funny anymore and everything sucks. Edit again May 2021: we have vaccines and we know how to contain covid. Stop whining and get back to your normal life. Or stay in your house for the next year if you're that worried about it.

There's something clean and classy about him, like he came out of the 50s or something

Once you have kids it's like having a dealer for excuses to get out of plans.

Him finishing this joke in 2024: “Canceling plans is like heroin, and trust me, I would know” *thunderous applause*

If canceling plans is like heroin then we all must be high as f right now

Jokes not clear: Got addicted to heroin

"How does John know how to make a cosmopolitan?" God bless you John Mulaney.

I can’t breathe “tots are angels who haven’t died yet”

I was able to kick my heroic addiction by constantly canceling plans, I dont have friends now, but totally worth it

School teachers are always at bars. Make sense though.

The bit about how great doing nothing feels as an adult is like one of the top 5 things a stand-up comedian has said that I identify most with.

I'm from NY where " let me call you later " translates to " enjoy the rest of your day " 99% of the time

Dude, it's not just adults whose faces light up when they do nothing... It's the same for teenagers, like from age sixteen and up. I'm saying this from experience.

"I know you'll have fries" will forever be joke with all my friend groups.

Him and Drew gooden radiate the same energy

Can’t believe this man did hardcore drugs a few years before this

I JUST REALIZED: HE STANDS LIKE A CHARACTER FROM DOCTOR SEUSS!!!!

I don't like when I order fries and people think it's for the table 🤣

I hear everything he says in spider ham voice.

"Either you're a Tot, or you're an Angel." So my biology teacher lied???

"Nobody has said bozo in a 1000 years" proof John Mulaney is immortal.

It took me a while to realise there is bonus content in here. At first I thought maybe I forgot a few jokes but then I realised it was not possible because I watch this special like every other Thursday.

John Mulaney: *Insults the New York Post* Alexander Hamilton: Lemme at him- Eliza: No-

John is that funny kid in class who we just stuck in a mostly fitting suit and is now doing stand up

4:34 this aged well 💀

"Hey Madge..give us the scoop.." "She told him to beat it bozo!" LOL

anyone here after hearing about his reoccuring addiction🥺 glad he’s getting help tho

"a hero is any man who does his job" oh my fucking god i love him

4:29 This aged like fine milk 🤣

At least he's telling this joke knowing about the drug and canceling plans. Love how he did that for research

This man made my laugh at dead children. Legendary

The ripping apart of the New York Post was so hilariously accurate.

John says he's sorry, but Annemarie says "Beat it, Bozo."

you're not fooling anyone Barry Allen!

I distinctly remember a day in my life when I was like 5 years old and I had a play date but I was busy doing literally nothing in particular so I didn't want to do it. I remember telling my mom and feeling really bad about cancelling, almost to the point where I didn't want to out of pure kindness for their sake. My mom helped me out and told me to tell them I wasn't feeling well and that it technically wasn't really a lie since that was how I was feeling. So I called him up and told him I wasn't feeling well. That's like my superhero origins story only my superpower is being addicted to not doing things.

His references to drugs are even funnier now.

"How does John know how to make a cosmopolitan" had me rolling

Tots are angels who haven’t died yet is an amazing line

"The less amount of time you live. The better- according to The Post"

5:33 Massage Therapist here: Funny enough, we have the same joke.

“Beat it, Bozo!” gets me every time and I don’t know why 😂

John Mulaney looks like a default 1980s commercial man

All these drug jokes hit different now

I discovered this guy a couple years back and ever since he's been my favorite comedian. I'm 28 and do love all comedy, especially dark or twisted humor but was ecstatic because I could show my parents and know they would share my love for him. What I absolutely treasure about him and his comedy is that it's as hilarious as anything but his sets are confined to wholesome and non controversial topics which doesn't come close to any sort of stab at a particular race, sex, nationality, w/e. He's just funny, plain and simple. Also, he embraces the fact that his appearance and way he speaks is very much the way many homosexual guys tend to be with a joke that he completely owns 😂

John mulaney is hilarious, but he did not have to call me out like that in the part about ordering fries 😂

And New York post left the audience..

you know i heard he went to rehab for cancelling plans

John seems to have been flash frozen in 1955 and recently de-thawed.

Any joke he does about coke feels DIFFERENT now

I cancelled a trip to the store today, then had to lie down for a couple of hours to ride out there ensuing high.

This hits different in quarantine but in a worse way

Listen, I find John Mulaney SO funny but the power of him saying “A hero is any man that does his job” is honestly just...incredible.

He is def telling the truth about finally doing nothing over the weekend 😂😂😂🤦🏾‍♀️😩

Love John's stand up! He's a huge inspiration of mine!

Cut to him whiping off his shirt for doctor Micheal

"Tots are angels that haven't died yet." Gotta say that one did it for me

The fries joke is so on point Nobody wants to waste good money spent on Fries

That moment when you didn't consent to cancelling plans bc of COVID-19

This is my favorite comedian, I love his relatable jokes and in my own small career of stand up, I take inspiration from him. I love how he changes his voice at different parts: especially when he is talking about a letter from college and he says "how did they phrase it? ah yes... GIVE ME MONEY. WE WOULD LIKE A GIFT BUT ONLY IF IT'S MONEY." so funny keep up the good work!

Maaaaan, as someone who has taught elementary school, before, I felt that teacher joke in my soul. I perfectly understand what that teacher was feeling.

This lad is on point.

He really did take an order of crack for the table.

Knowing he had to go to recovery for drugs and now rewatching his stand up makes so much sense. I hope a great recovery for him and future!

"I did absolutely nothing and it was everything I thought it could be" -Peter Gibbons from Office Space

John Mulaney and James Corden are the gayest straight men on television 😂😂😂

I was lightly chucking here or there until "How does John know how to make a cosmopolitan?" ... my mother came to check if I was breathing

6:55 Is no one going to talk about how John considers going to the bathroom an active day.

i love how he just transitions from his old lady smoker voice to “i’m feeling good tonight, i got a massage” by pausing for a second

Love reading comments of people who don't understand John Mulaney trying to watch his content. Ha ha. He's so good live. I saw his latest tour Kid Gorgeous and it was great. Other guys wore suits and he called them out. And his jokes aren't racist, homophobic or sexist either. Maybe that's why some people don't like him but that's their opinion and there's plenty other comedians for them to watch then.

"no one has said bozo in a thousand years" squid kid: (says it 500 times per stream)

So many drug references… it all makes sense now

Quarantine has turned us all into children wanting to do things

My fav kid comedian. That Asian soccer mom is the bomb!

Whoah…. I just figured it out, the key to kicking any habit/drug: Plan to do it, put it on your calendar, think about it, then right before you use, cancel your plans! then you’ll get high off the relief of canceling instead of getting high off the drugs.

This plays differently now that we know what was going on in his life.

I use his stand-up comedy for practicing my listening lol. His words is clear yet entertaining

His demeanor reminds me of Jerry Seinfeld, especially during that fries joke

I thought I'd just like to say.... This aged like an odd yet intriguing wine

his little chuckle at 4:05 is the cutest goddamn thing ive seen all day >_

A plate of fries for the table? Y’all, I’m ordering fries for me and only me.

I find mariachi bands DELIGHTFUL. Public transportation, on the other hand...

John Mulaney is absolutely the best. I’ve heard many of his stand ups tons of times, since XM has such a tiny repertoire of comedy (apparently). Dude makes me cry almost every time.

Best New York Post headline: Tiger is a Cheetah

As a former server, the way people act when they're ordering *naughty food* is perfection.

4:01 the way John says "yeah" is like how pete davidson would say "yeah".... no wonder theyre besties.

I think I finally understand why Jerry Seinfeld was such a hit in the eighties and nineties

i saw this as an ad and i 200% know that i’ve seen this bit approximately 900,000 times but i still watched it all the way through what do we call that, ladies and gentlemen? *dedication*

For a second there I thought this was Barry Allen from The CW The Flash show LOL 😅

7:29 “I know YOU’LL have fries if I get fries!!” 🤣

It doesn't have to be right, it just has to be short is an underrated line

Nobody: Me: Wheezing alone in my freezing cold backyard watching this

I guess we know what the New York Post article on John Mulaney will call him lol

0:20 “Normally if given a choice between doing something and nothing, I chose to do nothing. But I will do something if it helps someone else to do nothing. I’d work all night if it meant nothing got done.”