The Dad we never knew we needed.

He should write a book: Relationships for Dummies - I'd surely buy a copy

Communication is key. I'm so amazed at so many people that won't speak up to avoid conflict. Meanwhile they hold resentment and the other person will have no idea you are upset.

It took one Jordan Peterson video like this one for me to say "SORRY I SCREWED UP YOUR CHILDHOOD KID" to our 17 year old daughter. She accepted my apology and i may have just had the deepest conversation with my daughter than i have ever had.

I never get tired of listening to this man.

Jordan “Take a look at the damn bird” Peterson

“Could you improve it without making it worse?” Great question.

Each organ transplant causes a rejection. Marriage is hell of a organ transplant. The more you both have in common, food, sex, religion, kids, hobbies etc. The better chance for you marriage to last. So don’t just marry her because she is cute, or he is strong. Take a good look at each other’s background, parents, religion, holidays, dreams and desires, understand the aspirations, then and only then make a commitment. Life is short don’t waste it on losers.

I wish we could have taken important classes like this in early high school. It seems like that would have helped us in our understanding of people, communication, relationships, etc. Why do we make our kids wait until college to learn psychology when, at that point, they are already suffering from years of relationship issues?

God, this person is brilliant. You know what the best moments are? It's always those moments. When you're trying to study something. And when you're listening to Peterson. The moments when you got so close to understanding something, that all that's left for you to do is verbalize what you've understood... And then you hear someone else say it. It almost brings me to tears.

It doesnt take many Prof. Peterson lectures to realize my parents were completely clueless.

Suffering makes you bitter. Bitterness leads to resentfullness, resentfullness leads to vengefullness and vengefullness leads to... Well it leads to you thinking and doing things you didn't know you were capable of.

When he burries his face in his hands...i died. I feel like that so many times!

I cook every meal. I’m a man. Our kitchen is not a disaster afterwards. I thoroughly enjoy making healthy meals for my wife and child. It gives me a sense of purpose.

He is such an interesting man to listen to. Fascinating, really. I like his views on marriage. It's so devalued in western society, but what many people don't realize is that two people are always stronger than one, if they work together towards a common goal.

I'm both happy and jealous the younger generation has this man to learn from. What a gift he has and is

Resentments become hate.

that part about being unconcious about the undercurrent of resentment in a relationship and walking on eggshells around eachother is so true. You can sense it even with you're with another couple. It is miserable to be in a relationship like that

"The kind of mistakes you're making are sufficiently catastrophic" only Dr. Peterson can express himself this way☺

I wish these lectures could include the images he uses on the board.

7:12 - 7:28 is why I watch these lectures. Jordan is an amazing intellectual.

I concentrate on Peace and Glory in anything..but especially relationships...because it works!

This video is powerful. My husband and I would do this without realizing after our son was born. I felt such resentment that I would not address. We worked it out but this really reminds me of how bad that resentment became.

"Could you improve it without making it worse?" This comes up in so many of Jordon's talks and is key to rational thinking about leadership.

Not addressing relationships specifically but also applies to friends and family. I've learned about my own tendencies and avoiding conflict. I weigh up the options of voicing something at a specific time because maybe they already have a lot going and their mood has been impacted - so it is an informed decision. My approach and experience depended on the person. Speaking and voicing your feelings is a lot easier when the person genuinely listens and is not very neurotic. You've got to be careful with your approach and not launch a full-blown attack because that will elicit a defensive response no matter what. Jordan hits the nail on the head with that scenario and that you don't want to bring up a million things at once. The thing is if a lot of conversations addressing these issues have been had before and the person acts the same and adds more things you don't like then you do become resentful and less optimistic about the future because your expectations aren't being satisfied. All I can say is choose wisely and speak up from the very outset. That way, you'll set the tone early on and if it's not working overtime then you can identify why it hasn't succeeded because you've both taken time to discuss and address the things you believe are important to each other. Would love to get people's thought's on my perspective. (bad and good)

"Could you improve it, without making it worse" Always a good question to start out with.

I'm so thankful that I found this man.

this can work if the other person is willing to listen...

Dr. Peterson is a truly great man. We all meet them once or twice in real life and thirty years on look back and realise he cared, really was extraordinary, really was telling me something, but now it's too late because I didn't damn well listen and went my own way which was wrong.

Imagine what it was like to be a student in that class. J Peterson is Baller in every sense of the word!

Please write a book about relationship. I love it and definitely buy it.

* I wish I had teachers/professors like this in school..*

“Could you improve it without making it worse?” I think we can apply this question to MANY parts of our lives..

Good will and honesty the only strategy for couples to save their relationship. Thanks Jordan for brining this out!

What I'm trying to take from this Is don't hit others at their top heirchary It's better to speak accurately on issues that are bothering you specifically So that you can maintain physiological harmony Enjoy the novlties without resentment or bottled up emotions

"Seek and you shall find" I sought for a psychologist like Jordan, and I have been bless beyong my needs.

I absolutely love how he thinks, analyzes and articulates problems.

This is so important to understand! I wish I were taught this at a younger age because it would've certainly saved my relationships. It's never too late to learn and make the needed changes in your life, though. The blessing is to never lose the curiosity to learn and do better each day with the information.

When he did the grunting... it really hit home.... It also exists where couples are direct with each other but not listening... no skills to micro-analyse the situation until its too late... Too many defensive mechanisms in the way to be able to truly see the underlying issues, not only with the other person, but with one's self.

Glad to see giving credit to Gottman Institute and JP is good at voicing is resources. Landmark Education is also awesome in providing tools for growth.

Thank you Dr. Peterson!!! Im a Hollywood Hopeful/Life Coach in training, I recently overcame my 4th Psychotic Break n your words have helped me realize how 🤔 SANE I actually am.... because ALL PEOPLE SUFFER with arguments 🙄 n daily upsets, mine are louder!!! Haha but now that my emotions are tolerable, n my creativity is still Lit.... I feel I CAN BREATHE and by being "gentle, gentle" as Tracee Ellis Ross would say, I can move forward on my career path and continue my creative process, while sharing the techniques that eased my patterns and triggers.... God Bless, the wonderful and EDUCATED men and women in the world!!! I have great respect for psychiatry, n Dr's n Nurses and HERO WORKERS that risk their lives for our creature comforts!!!! Thank you 😊

Watching Jordan Peterson tab through slides is great.

Key words: divorce couple behaviors: unconscious, negative behaviors . Good coupe : response each other in a positive way, better communication skills .

I wish I had his insights. Jordan Peterson is fantastic in putting things in perspective. Clarity is overwhelming with him. I've learned so much from him.

Great advice again. Thanks so much for uploading!

I wish I had watched his lectures years ago!

Dont focus on the person, focus on the behaviour. Like "babes can you please wash the cup, when you done using it", is better then "you are such a messy person and you never clean up!"

He’s a genius. Love watching his videos and incorporating his guidance 🙌🏻👁✨

Great lecture!! Wished we had such people around us!!👍👌👏

Truthful and real. Respond in positive way❤❤

Amazing lecture.

Brilliant. Pure gold.

Loving your videos you have a new subscriber!

I love listening to him!

I have an uncle Peterson, he looks very different and sounds different but sometimes he will say things like 'get your life together' to me, so I call him Jordan! Haha 😁

Thank you , again

I didn't even know why im sad and feeling bed before this guy appeared in my life!! I finelly cried after more than q 15 years trying

I'm trying to save my relationship right now. This wasn't what I was looking for, but if I do save it, it will surely help. Thank you for sharing.

These tips are amazing for a conversation with an adequate person. Which most usually is not the case.

Godlike thought as always...

Is he talking about Maslow’s Hierarchy? Really interested in these concepts if anyone’s certain of this!

He is so logical and brilliant.

Dr Peterson looks tired. Probably from carrying around that heavy ass computer

3:15 I truly am too blunt. I'd tell my Partner I don't care about birds like he does but I love seeing him happy so I'll at his smile.

sooooo interesting

I wish I had more of the JP insights and knowledge before I headed into my previous relationship. I'm certain it would had lasted if I knew these things better, and it would've been all I ever wanted. I'm afraid it might be too late now. But I have faith that God will one day have our paths cross again, and who knows, perhaps then it'll last and we can have all the things we spoke and dreamt of. Marriage and a family, a life together, challenging eachother and growing together. Who knows what the future holds, but either way, I've grown thanks to this experience and Mr. Peterson. For that, I am forever grateful. I am now better prepared for the suffering of living, and I accept the challenge.

Oh my God! This man is a well os wisdom

That - what is that! - Great lecture by the way I watch these forever

Great slides 7:10 👌🏻

sooo true

The problem is its hard to find someone whos willing to have a civil conversation. Iv learned to never go to bed angry when you have an argument.. always talk about it. A mind is a very powerful and tricky thing.

Im addicted to JP

Wish they would post all of this lecture

Yep. The horror underneath the surface is the preconceived unresolved personal conflict transferred from each partner’s original family before the relationship.

great information for all that's a fact

If I am to try to improve it, I have to make it worse before. I have to disassemble the machine, understand its functioning, see clearly where the malfunction is, obtain or create the part that needs to be replaced, reassemble the machine and then try to start it again. Do not ask me if it will be better before I do my best to repair it. I do not know. But if I do nothing it will never be better. Hopefully I will get smarter after having ruined a few machines, but then I will get the knack of it and find shortcuts and resources that will make me skillful. I will become a repairman. The idea that I should never do anything that might make things worse is the best way to stifle resourcefulness. Dive into it, Man, you will go from difficulty to difficulty but you will learn to fix stuff!.

I love how matter of fact JP is. You know he's had to have studied A LOT. Fact check him

what "couple goals" often people refer to is "them vs the world" what it should've been, and much harder and much more fucking badass is "them vs themself"

I would love to see the slides thatngo along with this lecture.

Brilliant

I wonder if his students understand the gravity of the amazing gift they have in learning from and having direct assess to this man's mind?

Understanding perception

There's a 5th one too, you get really excited and jump over there to look and really enjoy the moment with your partner and get curious about the bird.

TL;DR: 8:47 - 10:14 "Could you improve it without making it worse?"

True

How do you repair those broken hierarchies? 2:30

I wish I would have been introduced to Jordan before I lost my wife. It may not have made the difference but I wood have had some knowledge and tools that neither me or my wife were taught. I've learned so much the last year since I've actually looked into how to be in a marriage. How to be a husband and a father. I thought I was doing ok not knowing how and never having any kind of role model. I hope young people will take time to learn how important marriage is. You don't want to be 50 and your family is all over the place and your alone and now you have knowledge and tools when it's to late.

Knowledge so brilliant I feel the need to wear sunglasses

Where can I find the extents of the end of the talk about hierachy abstraction critique? I'm curious on this cliff hanging end...

Hard hitting

Which lecture was this taken from?

Please I need link to the full video lecture and is there a way to see the slides? Thank you.

😂 ❤️ ☹️ I don’t know weather to laugh or cry.

Reality is fucked for a genuine, rational person that is surrounded by a bunch of narcissistic, irrational, toxic people. The fact that these genuine people even have to deal and adapt their personality to these kinds of people is just fucked. Just shows that reality is shit and makes me think living isn’t even worth it.

After the tenth bird interruption while doing something that requires intense concentration AND informing significant other of that fact, annoyance and contempt noises are warranted.

Sure wish my husband and I could get counseling from him

"Obviously it doesn't work well. Could you improve it without making it worse"

“Could you improve it without making it worse?”

What's under the surface? "I WEEL KEEL YOU!!!!"

I'm guessing the diagram is based on Maslow's heirarchy