you sound like you're doing what God had planned for you and that's the best place for you to be. congratulations on you're success in life. what you're doing is hands down more rewording then any carrier ever could be. 👏

The world doesn't need more brains, they need art and children

@@kc6810 did you not read my comment? I did go to school 😂 I graduated at 19 with my Bachelor of Science in Accounting and Business and did it with no debt Thanks to PSEO and academic scholarships. I value education a lot. My children are very robustly educated in all subjects and they read classic literature every night. I want my children to be very intelligent and educated and disciplined and ambitious and I also want them to be peaceful, kind and gentle with a heart of service for their families. I want my daughters to be welcoming hostesses, good housekeepers and gardeners with every skill I can gift them. I want them capable of working a difficult job and capable of fostering a healthy home. I certainly would not teach them to shun the feminine skills of all the generations of women who came before them. Cooking, housekeeping, sewing, embroidery, gardening, flower tending, these are beautiful things to learn for boys and girls. You seem to have a very ugly view of the feminine which is unfortunate, there is value in the feminine and the masculine, there is no need to denigrate the homemaker to prop up the career woman

This exactly. I went to prestigious schools and was fairly successful. I married the best man, and I use my intellect in my accomplishments as a wife and homeschooling mom. There's no job more important for a woman. Children need so much love, education, and nurturing, and no one can give it like their own parents. It doesn't make sense to outsource that role to someone else for the sake of some kind of ideology or career.

What country do you live in?

Happy for you. Glad you kept at it!

I can’t imagine the emotional stamina you had to develop along that journey. I’m happy for you!

Thank you for sharing and giving hope to those who are wanting to give up having kids, or think it's too late

I cant imagine. Bless you and your daughter

Congratulations on your daughter!! We’ve lost 8 but are thankful for the 7 we have been blessed with on earth.

this is an amazing comment that all people should read. I am 45, male, and I had my first kid at 41 and second 3 months ago - but my partner is 10 years younger, and that made things for us so much easier - although she felt it too, first one was easy (she was strong and fit), second was much harder for her, as she said. I guess if she got pregnant at 20 it would be much easier , carring a pregnancy

Can you explain involuntary?

Involuntary or zero accountability?

​@@DriveupLife22 They wanted children, but can't have them...

Did you start to try have kids at 32? Did you have any issues prior to giving birth the first time?

I get your point. We are never happy with what we have. But in a way, I think that's because there's too much ambiguity in what makes us happy, so we basically don't know what that is, and that lack of clarity makes us scared we are missing out on something. However, I think if we were more connected to our true nature, we would know what's better for us, achieve true happiness, and be more content with what we have.

Also I think they exaggerate a lot. Most people don't have problems conceiving in their 30ies and some people have problems conceiving in their 20ies. Often it doesn't have to do with age.

I agree with a lot of what you are saying. However I do think there is a mirage presented to young women everywhere that they are no longer restrained by their biological clock. It is in the subtle push for equality means sameness, and the downplaying of traditional family unit and values.

Love this. I was young having kids and sacrificed my dreams and career. It’s a sacrifice on both sides and no one talks about it thoroughly

People genuinely feel like they can just poison their bodies with the pill or an iud and just bounce back years after damaging the natural body

I hear you. I got pregnant easily at 37. I knew I had great longevity and fertility genes, but girl. I'm 37 now, 6 months and EVERYTHING HURTS. And I'm a very strong, very muscular women but still, holly God. This NO JOKE. I just pray this doesn't get much worse and try to simply be happy and strive because my baby is healthy.

You got this momma! But it is really hard when they are not walking yet. Sending you prayers and love.

super inspiring, how/where did you meet your wife?

@Aila Verco Where the hell did that assumption come from?

People need to realize that men’s sperm health declines at 40 and also factor in the risks.

This is incredibly encouraging for me to read, thank you for leaving this comment. I have had a couple of serious health issues that have sidelined me from having a relationship and family for far too long. Now having put in years of an incomprehensible amount of effort to heal and get better, I want to get this started ASAP!

You can breed a woman at any time. Never worry guys. They are the ones with the problem. You just have to stay healthy

Weird isn't it? that females think some faceless corporation cares about them, lmao you're just a _temporary_ asset. You'll either retire one day or phased out or laid off and no legacy will be had and nobody will care what you did for [insert nameless company here] children are the only legacy for 99% of the population, because 99% of the population doesn't have the IQ and personality it takes to make a legacy _outside_ of reproduction, apparently females just don't seem to understand that.

Wow. That last sentence really hits home. It really sinks in me. "Nobody's gonna remember the photo of that manager."

Do women really have a biological urge to have kids? A lot of childfree women a denying that.

You should have just never had a kid your too old and now the kid will suffer with a dead parent before the age of 20 your nothin but a selfish pawn of the matrix

I think the lie is that family will make you happy, it won’t.

Go back 100 years, and people had families and they had almost nothing, but they survived. Its always a choice, but back then the family was your social security, not government. Today, big government is your family.

You hit the nail on the head with this one.

Even though you’re right to an extent… the interesting thing is that poorer families and immigrant families have more kids than middle class / college educated families

@@fightsportspace7327 yea but lots of those kids never make it out of poverty and if they do they have much less kids but you would also have to factor the population size of the lower class.

Children is affordable if you don't think they need every little thing to 'succeed' in life. But of course, nobody wants thier children to be the 'poor' kid so they just don't have children.

It may be too late for her but it’s not for you. Also, you should have made it clear to her that having kids is important for you and take a decision early on if she did not want any.

It is not too late. Many people start their family in their 40's and are happy. You will still make a great dad, one who has more wisdom.

Move on you can still have kids she made her choice.

should have left her 10 years ago. couples have an obligation to give each other 3 things.. children, sex, and domestic support. if someone is refusing to give you one or more of those three things, you have an obligation to leave them and find someone who will.

You can still do surrogacy, adoption, they’re even coming out with science to create/clone a baby for infertile couples ❤

Nothing particularly strange to me.

Personally u started at the right time

@@kc6810 to me it mattered that they were all boys. Tbh I didn't really want a daughter. My wife has a 13yr old daughter. weve been together almost 7yr now and the kids were planned. We planned for 2 but life had other plans for us lol

@@misguidedpearls7456 yea it seems to be working out. I am just worried sometimes because my dad passed at 52 and my mom at 64. But I've changed alot about my lifestyle to be healthier so I hopefully have less chance at getting sick later in life

I've never been a feminist and never wanted children too early nor too late. But i endedup having one at age 33 and then at 34 and the energy ain't there. I am old. I am 34 to 35 as I type this😅 so I tied my tubes bc I ain't going through this.

and you can do the college now, or later, when your kids are old enough to take care of them selves (be independant to a point). My mother got me at 21, my brother at 26, she finished highschool, then when I was a kid she finished higher scholl, then when I was adult and she was 50 she finished faculty - she is now succesfull business women earning more then anyone in the family (she is 65), we all beg her to retire and just enjoy grandkids, and she promissed no business after 2014 :) my point, you can still do it, when education is in question

Right-the more kids a woman breastfeeds, the lower her chance of breast cancer. I was actually shocked at how much lower a woman's risk of breast cancer is after breastfeeding six kids.

Good for you. If I had children in those years, I would have spend my life as a lifeless creature to my than boyfriend, so good I didn't.

It's not difficult to meet a guy. Just lower your standards there are willing men all over the place.

Very true as well

@@lovelydove99 exactly. it is often portrayed as if women just chose not to start a family, "because of their career", but I know many women who never believed that work was the priority in their life and still ended up alone and childless for lack of a sincere, loving and reliable man. most of them tried and had relationships that made them deeply unhappy, so they decided to live alone and learned to be ok with it, but it doesn't mean that they prefer this way of life over having a family or that they prioritized other things, they just didn't want to settle for something bad and unstable AND then throw a child into that situation as well.

We are! It’s constantly in the back of our heads and anyone who says women are told otherwise is not living in reality. For God’s sake, I had a professor tell the whole class of 19 year olds to be mindful of their biological clock. I put up with awful men in my early 20’s because I was worried I was getting old! All my friends were married by 25 and I was nervous.

For that reason I accept to be with my ex bc as a woman I have to take advantage of my youth. In the end, he treated me badly and I stand up for myself and broke up with him. While my friend who is older than me was living her happy single life without having her first kiss.

Not all women, just read the comments and you will find out people who lived a different life than you. The wife of my friend is one of those she thought having kids at 40 was a thing because she saw so many Hollywood celebreties having children at that age. She didnt know that she was lied to until she went to a doctor and he explained it was harder than it seems past 30.

I think the average modern 20-something woman is too picky when it comes to evaluating if the guy is handsome / fun enough / if there's an immediate spark and fireworks and butterflies / if the relation feels effortless. And I think she's not picky enough when it comes to long-term qualities such as emotional stability, treating her right, etc. Someone else has put this as: young people (guys too) are almost looking for a prom date: is the other person fun, attractive, will my friends approve. But those things are less important in the long term than things like emotional stability. So "become more selective": if you're talking about things like emotional stability then absolutely. But I fear that some young women will read your post and will think "okay, so he needs to be 6 feet tall, make 6 figures and be fun and hot. Check." Imo the key is not "become more selective", it is "stop trying to find a hot prom date and start trying to find an actual life partner. And yes, that may mean going for a guy who is a bit less hot and fun."

Thanks GOD , you make right decision, so your child didnt trough abused in awful marriages .

That sucks I understand my mother was in the same position. Ur an exception just like she is.Try to rebuild urself first then everything else should work out for u. But women who suffer abuse should not be included in any stats imo

If your photo is current, you shouldn’t have issues. You appear to be relatively fit and attractive. Your problem may be what so many women’s problems are. Going after the bad boys or men in your league for s3x but not in your league for serious dating.

@@bannedbycommieyoutube5time920 no, I tried dating a “nice guy” and turned out he had a long standing girlfriend for the last 10 years. The problem is there aren’t enough masculine men that aren’t narcissistic or have some other toxic quality. Or they lack ambition and drive. Can’t put all the blame on “women focusing on their career”, there are too many other factors than that. How about more men get their act together?

@@laurakcollins 1. if the guy was willing to cheat on his 10 year girlfriend, he isn’t a good guy. I’d bet good money he was cheating with several other women as well. 2. Another giant red flag here is he had a girlfriend for 10 years and didn’t marry her. Not a good guy, you were manipulated. Not being mean, just pointing out reality. 3. What used to make men get their act together and work harder was the reward of having a traditional wife that met some very basic requirements: 1. Fit 2. Feminine 3. Cooperative (not to be confused with a pushover) 4. Childless 5. 20’s (fertility) 6. Virgin or damn close to a virgin 7. Not leftist feminist lunacy (85% of women 18-34 vote Democrat) 8. No wild tattoos and/or piercings 9. Not in debt (women have 70% of the consumer debt and 80% of the federal student loan debt in the USA) Unfortunately, roughly 1-2% of modern women meet these extremely basic standards. Standards that the majority of their great grandmothers met that even average men received. When the juice isn’t worth the squeeze, men don’t have the primary incentive that motivates them. Men don’t spend like women do on average, this is statistically proven. They don’t need much if they are going to be on their own. What you end up with is men still want s3x, so the ones with means will do so, but they generally have the most to lose (women initiate 80% of all divorces, men pay the lions share of alimony and child support), so they avoid marriage and just date around. The rest of men check out, because they either aren’t physically or mentally able to get to the top 10%, or are disgusted that all the women are going after and sleeping with guys out of their league and then show up damaged in their 30’s looking for marriage.

@@bannedbycommieyoutube5time920 Well obviously I was lied to, I was not aware of any of that at the time. I’m just saying that even if they aren’t the “bad boy” type which he wasn’t, doesn’t mean they are good guys. And what “used” to motivate men to get their act together, is no longer the case. The problem I have experienced is finding good men, that are masculine, to begin with. So many men lack masculinity or are toxic and narcissistic. I’ve yet to find a man that also matches what I offer. If women need to meet all of those standards you listed out, then men need to meet our standards as well. No person is perfect, but finding a good person that’s a compatible match is not as easy as it used to be. And I’d rather be alone than settle for a man that doesn’t have it together. My point here that you also proved, is that we can’t simply blame it on the fact that women are focused on their careers. There are many other factors on both men and women’s side that contribute to that.

Have children, even if you don't want to. It's a societal obligation. If we can force upon people societal obligations regarding climate change and vaccination, we can force on reproductive obligations. Bite me.

@@infinity8636 lol ok

​@@infinity8636 says who? That's why we have so many people with mommy or daddy issues. Think again

@@midi6615 The alternative is not to stop having children. Thats like saying "What we have is not ideal, so lets make things even worse".

@@infinity8636 yes and then get resentful parents who pass trauma onto their kids. Great idea

What do you use instead of birth control?

@@shannonclaire7800 condoms. My husband and I got married when I was 19 and he was 24, so it worked for almost 6 years until we started trying for kids and in between kids. Now I have a low hormone IUD, but I don’t plan on having anymore kids.

Definitely. I think birth control and STDs are the main cause of these issues nowadays. It’s estimated that around 30% of infertility is due to damage to the Fallopian tubes from sexually transmitted infections.

That's a nice stretch to have kids! My grandma had five kids and her last was unplanned when she was 37 and she had no problems. My great grandma had 10 kids and her last ones were twins in her 40s. Do people ever think that women before hormonal birth control never had kids up until their 40s? Cmon now.

@@em77775 I guess so. My maternal grandma had 6 children, my mom was born when my grandma was in her 40’s. All four of my great grandmas had 5 or more children. None of them had complications. The only person in my family who had fertility issues is an aunt, but she had cancer in her uterus and had to have it removed.

Omg 11 I couldn't 🙈

@@kc6810 youngest of 7 here 🙋🏻‍♀️ some people believe that there isn’t enough love to go around in big families, but it’s the opposite. Love does not get divided between the children, it gets multiplied. I’m close with many other people from big families and none of them would have had it any other way.

It's not about time. It's called Nature.. human nature

I will say I hate being called “lucky” for choices I consciously made and others didn’t.

I will say I hate being called “lucky” for choices I consciously made and others didn’t.

I send you this: 🤗

Better to find the right person first than settle for anyone out of fear. 12 years wasted, it's up to you if you want to waste another 12 or live life on purpose. Your life has meaning and purpose, find that first. His name is Jesus Christ and He is able to restore to you what you lost. I wish you all the best.

With absolute certainty, leave this relationship. No one is worth giving up having children. It is the most wonderful thing in life. With luck you could find someone new and be pregnant within 2 years if you date with the specific intention of finding someone who wants a family. But your window is closing quickly, and there is no time to waste, especially on someone who does not even have a job. I found my husband a bit later in life and now we are expecting our 3rd child. It has been worth it. Don’t let yourself miss out because you are afraid to move on.

Get out of that relationship now! There are dating services that will match you with a man looking for marriage and family. It’s not too late but I encourage you to get wise counsel and to move forward strategically. There is nothing wrong with pursuing marriage like you would a career.

When I was 30, I was in your exact situation. By 31, I had left this relationship. At 35, I met my now husband and committed to him. At 38, I got pregnant with my lovely son on the first try. I could never imagine my life without this child and my family. Now, I am finishing my PhD.

Leave him NOW

Right? Even if people get married young they are choosing to delay, the cost of living is too high. Why are we surprised women are working? They have to lol

@@bannedbycommieyoutube5time920 if you hate women a lot you can choose to be gay, get married with a man and adopt a kid

But it's also how you spend your money. People spend a ton of money on entertainment, lavish vacations, luxury cars, and excess stuff that we don't need. 50 years ago that wasn't happening. If everyone looked at what was really important and prioritized those things we'd be saving money and spending less frivolousy on things that don't matter.

people should always prioritize establishing a solid relationship AND career before having kids.

@@AJ-bu4yv memories and experiences do matter to some people??- especially people in their youth. Because it gets harder to do this stuff when you're older (even when having kids, you sacrifice a lot of your time and freedom)

Well, it’s easy for some people. But for many it is not. The trouble is, you don’t know which group you will fall in until you try to have kids. Then it’s really awful if you don’t have a big time window and you are in the group that has a difficult time getting pregnant.

@@hitherefriends3943 I was guilty of thinking it would be easy for us to have children. We even put off having children for a bit before trying, it wasn’t until we tried for a over a year that we became worried!

@@stella9624 absolutely IVF is tough on the body and the wallet. But do see it as a blessing in that it was available and we were fortunate enough to afford it.

@@kc6810 Did I make a remark on *ALL* childless women? *NO*. I stated a comment on the childless women that I know.

I know a lot of women like this too... I have a friend who's 45 and desperately wanted another child but her much younger husband didn't. It was so hard for her to find out I got pregnant with my 3rd baby without even trying ... but she spent her 30s living it up in LA while I was busy raising my kids

I'm 39 I think women marry n procreate too early perioto have a better impact on a cold emotionally i feel closer to 30 is better Just look at society for all the men n women that had kids under 25yrs old Look at the adults now That was the result.. Clearly a 20 yrs old is clueless about the emotional dedications of a child I'm not talking birthdays n feeding n clothing the kid I men emotional commitment N preparation for actual society not disney world

@@misguidedpearls7456 You got a point on that one, I was given to birth when my parents were 26-30 and they were at the perfect balance of emotional maturity and physical energy in my Toddler years when I needed the best of them.

​@@misguidedpearls7456 It actually had more to do with feminism rallying against marriage and family that out us where we are now

But did you try for a third baby and didn't fall pregnant or did you think that at 35 or 36 you would be too old? I had my 4th baby at 35 and now at 38 I'm even expecting a fifth baby so it's possible 😊

39 Had plenty of dating marriage n relationships Was fun but you didn't much I say build yourself Start focusing on dating closer to 30 I honestly don't see alot of better parenting done with kids who had moms n dads under the age of 27 And plenty of women have kids at mid 30s n 40s

@@misguidedpearls7456 Yep. I’m 39 and 12 weeks pregnant with my first child. It ain’t over til it’s over.

I rather regret not having than being a single mother, broke and no degree

Its my understanding that men are actually fertile well into their old age

@@Mr3DLC their sperms don't have the same quality it used to have

Yep I'm on the same page as you. It's not an either/or binary between work or children. Believe it or not, life can pan out for women as it has for us.

@@MusicaObscuraX Not true, liek at all. You're forgetting about the genetic abnormalities a female like her are. to be born with the IQ to do those things and the personality to be high functioning. Shes a double exceptions, so that means 99% of women will _never_ be able to do those things, they're just screwing around being voluntarily celibate chasing 20% of men. Nobody can have it _all_ and very few will have _most of it_ Let's not sell hopium here.

Studies confirmed that women who wait until their 30’s and 40’s actually live longer than women who give birth in their teens and twenties. Google this subject. Very interesting.

Don’t want glide but open to love maybe

Kids. I like freedom

How can u be so sure that u won't see your grand kids???

This is not pointed at women who can no longer have children, but to parents so that they tell their young daughters not to make that mistake.

@@Ben-bg2lp it’s not a mistake if you don’t have children. Not everyone wants them . Live your life , let Jesus help you along the way . Older women can have children young women can.

@@Conversationswithesther I'm not saying you should torture yourself because you no longer have the choice. I'm saying young women should make that decision as young as 18 with the knowledge that the option is not available after 30. After 12 years if thinking, if they still haven't recognized how important that is in a woman's life, then they can be like you; Content by themselves for the rest of their lives.

Rebecca, I don;t know if there is a God, I can;t tell. But I have a lot of 44+ female friends with no kids that are using God and his will for excuse of their selfishness and immaturity, reasons they couldn;t establish a relashionship. Most of them are very pretty, no carrier. If I can give you advice, I guess there could be a greater force out there, but imagine if that force is allowing you to make your own choices and bear concequencess of that choice - I would suggest first at finding a partner, a kind, noble person that communicates with you with respect, then during relashionship see if he would be a good partner and parent, then start family - you really don;t need more then a year of spending time with someone (you don;t even have to live together), to see what kind of person he is. 36 is still not too late regarding probabilities, and if you start living healty (excersise, healthy food, lowering stres where you can), I believe you will be able to find a truly great person for a partner, and to have great kids. I wish you luck, and the road ever takes you in Belgrade, Serbia, we can share a beer (or coktail or tea :)

A comment like that doesn’t show you’re on the right path. When GOD doesn’t show up to help with the repercussions of your attitude and decisions, you’ll only have one place to look to find fault.

I hope your dream will come true :) Find a partner that is kind, carring and threats you and others with respect. If he is established, super, but that is not the most important thing in a world, especially if both of you have fammily that can jump in to support in time of need. Go for it :)

Don’t you have trouble working in oven mitts? ;)

Women age like milk, men age like wine, in the dating market. Only MEN can delay marriage and children because they enter their dating prime later in life. Women should prioritize marriage first after they turn 18, and then embark on a career (if they want one) when their family is established. Women have between 18-28, really 18-23 to find a prime mate. Time flies, ladies.

​@@tiduszero41 chill

@@kittyhawk784 No, he’s right.

Studies confirmed that women who wait until their 30’s and 40’s actually live longer than women who give birth in their teens and twenties. Google this subject. Very interesting.

Yeah, a couple of days ago, I saw a video of some women's talk show and this 50 year old woman in the audience was saying that she decided after her divorce she would have a year of fun and she described how she was bangin' men ranging from 28 to 44 year old that she found on dating apps. She stopped counting how many after 12. She was bragging about this and the whole room had this, " you go gal!" vibe. What's interesting is, thst if 50 year old man was doing this everyone would consider him a perv. If we even go back to a supposedly "Patriarchal" time like the sixties, most people, including men, would think of 50 year old man having non stop random sex a perv. Whether the Progressive movement ever had a goal of making a better society is up to debate, but now it seems thst it's only purpose is to turn what was once considered selfishness and animalistic hedonism into a virtue.

@John ya it's a double standard. And idk why is that a win for the woman, men have low standard and fk whatever moving. The 50 yr old man at least have to pay to get fk, so he contribute to the economy lol.

@@johnsmithers8913 50 and dating apps?? But, damn granny 💀

@@inuhundchien6041 less inflation in the economy 💀

So you were groomed as a child? 😢

Studies confirmed that women who wait until their 30’s and 40’s actually live longer than women who give birth in their teens and twenties. Google this subject. Very interesting. You won’t live as long as older moms.

That’s far too young, not recommended to get married that young.

I don't encourage women under 25 to marry They usually won't pick the best partner n end up in unhappy marraiges.. And you're better emotional developed closer to 30 to b a better engaged n emitionally supportive parent Look at society all the kids that were raised by parents 16-23 yr olds having kids Look around you'll see alot of love n attention went very wrong

@@misguidedpearls7456all those kids raised by 16-23 year olds were mostly the result of taking part in the hookup culture. Though it’s hard not to participate in the hookup culture when your hormones and everything in you says: let’s make babies! And society says: oh but your career, your financial stability, all the fun you will miss out on! You’re too stupid, you’re too dumb, go educate yourself, waste those years at your 9to5 serving your boss. And theeennn see if you can start a family. If those same 16-23 year olds were in the mindset of: let’s get married and raise these children together (and not become a single mother statistic because a one night stand with Chad sounds fun), then I dare say those young parents would do perfectly fine, on the grand scale of things.

@@misguidedpearls7456 This is all based on your misguided experience. Apt name.

Don’t pressure her, is better alone than an irresponsible man

@@lilithrealm But she could be with a good man.

I had mine at 38 just fine. As far as having independence, I had that in my 20s and early 30s.

Studies confirmed that women who wait until their 30’s and 40’s actually live longer than women who give birth in their teens and twenties. Google this subject. Very interesting.

This is it! As much as many want to believe women choose not to start families earlier on, they just don't get a suitable partner.

@@stella9624 That's why I'm proposing if we can stop throwing fear at the 40 year old woman and allow her to believe and manifest in her own body's capabilities if that would change outcomes... Of course this video was about the problem but I would hope to see this be the next step in the collective solution, not that those women feel there's no chance unless they go to extreme measures immediately

​​@@chanamintz3743 stop ur bs. At 40 women have increased risks of losing the baby and they also have increased ricks on themselves too

Statistically the pregnancy risks for older women are pretty much only in women having their first baby after 35. Women who have given birth before then tend to have same risks as younger women even if they are pregnant again past age 35.

It's much easier to continue having children than to have your first child at 40.

Also, don't confuse women who have been on the pill, killing their hormones since 12, 13, 14, who live an unhealthy life with rural women who most likely haven't experienced birth control starting to have kids at 20.

i agree, and it seems like society keeps trying to push the start to adulthood out to peoples 30's.

Middle school imo is mostly pointless except the math portion it was mostly a repeat to help the slow kids catch uo

And how does that work with the large percentage of kids that don't know what they want to do in life? Are young adults in general that have to go through your plan B in Plant City before they get where they end up going more long-term.

@@someone92353 FOR MEN It was never intended for women.

Thank you. I'm 36 and I'm tired of being told I'm either a withered husk or that having a child will somehow fulfill me, wash all my cares away like a magic. I find my fulfillment by helping others or exploring new interests or hobbies, finding ways to contribute to my community. Don't let others dictate what they think should make you happy.

Of course. If your content that's fine just remember,it gets lonely after 40. My friends who are at their early 40s are regretting not having kids and they can't conceive so I feel bad for them. I'm a married woman with 2 kids. Have a good day:)

@@breecas2290 why is it specifically after 40 that they got lonely? Is it because other people have kids and don’t want to go out as often anymore? I have some friends who are late 30’s and they don’t seem so different. At this point I’m already juggling between my day job and my 2 biggest hobbies: fashion design and making music, I also meet friends at least 3 times a week. I don’t know how I could do this with kids, biggest respect to you as a mom!

​@@Jojo-official After 40 we start losing energy and start getting boring for young people. People of our age get busy with their children and life and have no time for us. They only people who care for us and want our time are our children. So have children before its too late. From Pakistan I am 35 and married for 2 years. My wife is 28. We are trying for two years. She had two miscarriages. Now she desperately want children but not conceiving. We are praying to have children as soon as possible. There are millions of people who want children but are not having them and then there are people who could have this blessing but they are losing this greatest blessing.

Totally see what you are saying. Marrying a man who is financially stable and likely older would be a must. This was common practice before. Give up school? I don’t think you have to, but getting that doctorate may take many years if wanted. I think the point is finding the partner is the priority and education/work is something you do along the way because it makes sense to do. Sadly, I have friends who will never have their own kids because they prioritized other things.

@@Justsayingthat There are also many examples of women who didn’t prioritize an education/career and ended up in very high risk situations with no way out. A younger woman with no career base marrying an older man & having children with him makes her very vulnerable to him. And of course, a younger and more inexperienced woman is more susceptible to a more seasoned experienced man’s manipulations as well. Was this the norm in the past? Yes. Did it end poorly for many women? If this is what society wants women to do they need to raise better men who truly put their wives’ needs first.

@@UnAnonKnown I agree with you. People have to treat each other well.

@@Justsayingthat Of course, but people are human. 25% of men in their 80s admit to having had affairs. Add to that vices (drugs, alcohol abuse, gambling addictions), abuse (physical & emotion) & misfortune (death, disability, and economic hardship) …. A significant portion of women need a backup plan. It’s not even that women are perfect … they aren’t. But no one advises men to set themselves up to be financially dependent on women.

I think Jordan think that people have too high of a standard for 'stability' and it's not hard to raise children even in modest mean. But maybe he's just being Canadian with free healthcare and education

I pretended I wanted to be a teacher to get the, "you have to have a career," pushers off my back. I never wanted to be anything but a mom. I feel like I could have been better prepared, but I don't regret having my children young. As a yoing woman I saw the narrative, wait until you're done college, wait until you have an established carreer, a house a car and then, you're too old.

@@Cocoisagordonsetter I still got an education. I have a masters degree. But I was blessed to have met my husband relatively young (22). I never dated before him or had other love interests. But once we were married we just stared a family right away.

Because when you find out your husband is having an affair, and if you decide you’re not going to put up with it- you have limited options as an over 40 divorcée with 4 kids. You’re also quite delusional to think that starting a business at 47 with 4 kids to tend to will be just as easy as if you were 32 with no kids and youthful good looks because you weren’t kept awake all night. It’s amazing how women like you stay in such a deluded little bubble with husbands who lie to you so they don’t have to find a new house servant. The younger ones cost extra ya know…

How do you manage your bills if you don’t have a career?

@aloqoshgirl It's a strategy for economic growth. The government and businesses benefit when women put their careers ahead of their families, because it contributes to economic growth and increased GDP. When a woman hits a career plateau, single and childless, we will see the psychological consequences.

you can put a bad word to anything, even drinking water "thanks, but I don;t want to be drowned" or receive blood infusion that will save your lif e"thanks, but I don;t want that toxid liquid in me", or getting paid for the job "thanks, but I don;t want that source of all evil in my hand" etc. Or, you can say that you are creating a new life, a person that will shower you with love, gratitude, smiles and who will discover the world with you (once again for you) - the reality is, family brings joy to people, unless it is corrupt - but anything that is corrupt brings sorrow. instead of racionalizing, listen to Peterson talk once again on this topic - and you are free to opt-out, of course. Only thing I ask is to keep an open mind, and to discuss the topic

​@@ivanangeli Just let them opt out. Trash like this isn't worth reproducing anyways.

Yay feminism... so liberating...

I relate to this very much. I was good in school but I hated it did just enough to get by and graduate. I was told by my mother that having children is a huge mistake and ruined her life I was always a complication. 8yrs now I've been with my husband, our daughter is the best part of our life, the purpose we have in life now is huge. But financially it's very hard to have more children I figure time is a factor I just made 29 and I fear not being able to have at least one more baby so my daughers children will have cousins 😓

Same!

I worked so hard in the pursue of a “career” only to realize it’s just a job no one cares or remembers in the end. Luckly I found my husband soon enough to make family and have meaning in my life. I was told similarly - having kids is a burden, a career will fullfill you, you can travel and buy stuff for yourself, that will fulfill you. All lies - at least in my case.

How old are you?

What you're saying is, that you want children. You're not prepared to give him children, which is a very different perspective and something the "right guy" is looking for. That, in all likehood means, that you have to make them on your own, or with a dude, you don't want to have children with. This game of feminism have pushed men to withdraw from females and wisely so. Remember, the narrative is pushed by your gender. Live with it.

exactly

Please don't stress. If you are a Christian, I really hope you are dear, then read the Bible and search there what's the task of a wife and mother, and then look for what's the task of a husband and father. And prey to God with all your will and heart to give you the right husband for you, and not your will, be His be done. Pray you have the children He is merciful to give you.

Why did you wait so long to find a husband and start a family?

@@modelingprincess21 I didn't wait. There was no one I loved.

I’m sorry to hear this 💛 that’s so painful. But whatever God’s plan for your life is, don’t give up!

What is a "good boyfriend?" Everyone is guaranteed to let you down over something at some point in your life.

Don’t worry Debrah. Things will work out soon. Take care

@@vhinosshveloo844 things do not just work out on their own, we have to make sound decisions, sometimes bold ones. Deborah you need counselling as a first step. Good luck

Of course you can. Good luck!!!

@@vassilopoula Don't be so negative, she is still young, go live your life!

Don't have kids to save the relationship. It won't work and is terrible for everyone involved most especially the children. I'm assuming you are a woman, if that is the case. Work to build your man up. Men need respect. Publicly compliment him on what he is doing right. Thank him for the sacrifice he makes on a daily basis. You'll find he'll start showing his love for you more. It's a positive feedback loop and a great way to combat anxiety and depression.

It is grim especially if that's your pic with that big beard. Close to nil women like that aesthetic. Unless you are rich, you have to pull women with your face. Women rather be impregnated by random Chad and raise the baby as a single mom than having ugly children.

What is the definition of "a right man?" Everyone is guaranteed to let you down over something at some point in your life.

I'm 37 and I'm not giving up! It's gonna happen. I'm gonna do all I can in these 3 years. I WILL NOT MISS!

@@jfish8696 perhaps i do not know the acceptance of just sit there and take it. i spent my life with a person for 12 whole years. you just sit there and take it? perhaps maybe your experience is easier. Mine was more like, well here is the poison, sit and take it. have done it 12 years. no more please. i think I have time left in my life that I do not have to keep taking this poison. Amen.

@@jfish8696 Responsible respectful and loyal.

@@jfish8696 it’s not easy to find somebody . Dating is hard rn and he doesn’t realize this.

I would rather we live a world that isn't speed running disease and child abuse by denying the physical realities of being human.

Studies confirmed that women who wait until their 30’s and 40’s actually live longer than women who give birth in their teens and twenties. Google this subject. Very interesting.

Studies confirmed that women who wait until their 30’s and 40’s actually live longer than women who give birth in their teens and twenties. Google this subject. Very interesting.

thats the main proble, with JP' podcasts about women. If you dig under the scientifish psycho-sociologish jargon of his, you will discover you are in an incel community chatrooom

@@vassilopoula Well, I mean that's what this one is all about, so it's like saying the sun makes light. Also, I guess you would have to find someone who's financially stable, or who is willing to become financially stable.

@@johnsherfey3675 What happens when that someone gets attracted to some other person and stops supporting me & the baby? Join a mass women who are taking men to court for child support? After seeing so many men who don’t support their children, so many women suffering trying to feed children go on to join them with hopes that the person I’m with would support the baby? Let’s be realistic, the problem starts with men. Modern women pursue careers so much and don’t have children at old age because we see a plethora of single mothers who sometimes even suffer till death raising their children penniless. I’d rather die without any child than bring a child here who I’d depend on the state to help raise!

What you do is make other life choices where you depend on yourself. Education and career

@@kc6810 I wish there were more positive conversations where women and men are happy together with whatever makes their relationship work. I think the reason why people don't talk about it is because they don't want to accept it. Either it shatters their ego or they're getting paid to promote a certain agenda. I think Jordan's daughter is out earning most men in America, but he won't express that or bring it up.

@T B thank you, we're happy in our union. Known each other for 14 years first before marriage.

@T B don’t be that kind of person 😂 it’s not cool

that is actually a smart choice. First fix yourself, then add burden of having to care for someone else who is totally dependant on you. This is why partnership is so important - I am 45 male, and I got my first kid at 41, secon 44 - and I also have an issue, short temper. And my kids used to push it to the limits - but when I realize I am getting truly angry, my wife takes over and I leave the room - I actually need only 2-3 minutes to regain my composure, but without those 2 minutes I would be so bulling with them. Somehow we manage to have a loving family where my kids live without fear of me, and my huge size of shoulders actually brings them feeling of security - but more so a fact that I never leash out on them, or my wife. Because she assists in problematic situations. I think it could be the same for you, once you get your issue under control. So, first step, you already did - you noticed an issue and took it seriously. Now, just talking to terapeists could be benefitial, as well a loving, nurtirung partner. I wish you luck :) and family, sometimes in the future :)

@@ivanangeli Thank you for that. The decision was a difficult one. Raising children is to me, the highest honor and responsibility is a gift to be taken seriously.

@@californiastars no problem :) I always think if I am a good parent, and always fear I am not doing my best as a parent, as, in core, I am a selfish and entiteled person that lived alone whole his life - but just few weeks ago my wife told me I am a good father - it tooked me by suprise, and made me feel so good. Yes, being parent is huge responsibility - but also it brings so much joy and good to the parent

@@ivanangeli awesome. 🙂

I feel u However i want to hear from a woman who had the first baby at 30 Bc its not the same.. You had kids prior thats a diff physical effect... We need more info on women in their 30s where that's the 1st baby So we have more perspective And can really see what it is I will say In my group alot of women drank n smoke all they 20s So if they were to have kids I'm their 30s common sense its gonna be hell Bc that's breaking down the body So that's not just about pregnancy Bc substances take time to show effects.. So all these things must b factored I had 1 child at 20 My friend is 40 no kids I have done better physically bc of many years of exercise n eating better I'm 39 now Soooo again lifestyle is another topic On if a womans body will respond one way or another.. These are not 1 size fits all topics So we need more information

I get it. Got pregnant on the pill at 23 by missing a weekends worth. Then we got pregnant less than one month after removing my IUD at 25. Now I’m gunna be 28 this year and I’ve always wanted three kids & my clock is screaming at me. My husband doesn’t get my hardline rule about being done with having a kids by the time I’m 30...Because biology - that’s why lol... Each pregnancy does wear your body a bit more, along with having additional children to care for during those pregnancies. I pray we’re able to complete our family soon.

I never had problems conceiving babies or having them the natural way without complications. The hard part for me is raising them, being patient all the time, the fights between the siblings, the noise, the dirt and chaos that comes with having many kids. It's not easy. That's the hardest part for me

Studies confirmed that women who wait until their 30’s and 40’s actually live longer than women who give birth in their teens and twenties. Google this subject. Very interesting.

@@misguidedpearls7456 Studies confirmed that women who wait until their 30’s and 40’s actually live longer than women who give birth in their teens and twenties. Google this subject. Very interesting. This poster had babies too young. It’s actually better for our bodies to wait until 30 at least! This is a fact proven I’m studies the medical community won’t tell you for some reason.

You can say the same about women as well. Thats why I say christians should marry each other, and reject the hookup culture. It can get very dilluded and be very frustrating to find long lasting relationships with people who dont value vows. Thats on both sides.

This is the truth, a truth that's not looked into.

It’s the casual sex culture that has ruined dating.

@@LadyK007 exactly

Studies confirmed that women who wait until their 30’s and 40’s actually live longer than women who give birth in their teens and twenties. Google this subject. Very interesting.

uhhh, there are many wrong choices... using drugs, being a bully, selling soul or body for profits, being overweight, doing bad things, smoking, baing evil to people, especially kids, stealing, sawing sorrow, hurting etc etc etc - many, many possible bad choices

@@ivanangeli Every choice you listed are choices that have much higher odds of having consequences that would lead to regret. None of those choices are objectively wrong. If you don't understand what I mean, go watch Kung Fu Panda again. Phenomenal movie. I would also appreciate it if you don't move the goal post. It's plain to see what this video and comment are section talking about: the choice of having children, and when. Let's keep it on topic. Go look through the comments and find someone who made a choice that was "wrong". For every person that says they wish they made a different choice than the one they had, there is another person who wishes for the opposite. Kids early vs kids later, how many, etc. There is no, "correct" way to do it. You can definitely argue for the "most optimal" way, but I vehemently disagree that it makes it the correct way. Do some thought experiments on a society that forces everyone to live the most optimal life possible, ultimately we just become robots practicing eugenics. A very dark place imo.

Yh sure keep feeding these women lies. They messed up and now they r afraid of the consequences.

If your children are something you regret therr is something inside of you that's not settled. You need to go to therapy to find that out and so you can live a happy and fulfilled life. Being successful isn't just measurable in dollar bills. You have success, just a different kind. If that's not good enough for you then you need to figure out why.

@@lindseymiller8165 I never said I regret my children, I said that I didn't weigh the choice of having children and when to have them, with the proper level of care. Please reread my closing sentences from the initial comment, you'll see that my suggestion is to turn your focus inward, rather than looking at others. Also, it is easy to recommend therapy to someone based on a couple of sentences in a comment section, as a sort of catch-all dismissal of their point while simultaneously appearing as if you care, but it fails miserably to take into account or show respect for the complexity that each individual has in their collective life experiences. You don't know me, what I have been through, nor what I have and am doing for my own well-being. Not that you deserve it, but in the hopes that it might help someone else who might read these comments in the future, I have been in and out of therapy most of my life. I have never been ashamed of it, and have helped to destigmatize it for multiple people that I have known, and ended up helping them to seek out help for themselves. I do know I'm ready to get back in again, but can't afford it right now, in time or money. It is extremely difficult and expensive to find a therapist that is a good match.

K, keep it that way then.

Well done

Hmmmmm

Yes, but emotional decision-making has lead to the opposite, trying to defy biology with using the pill, freezing eggs..

It doesn’t have to be one or the other. I had my daughter 7 weeks before starting a grad program. Now I’m not going to lie and say that my second was easy to conceive and I do believe my education stress is a large part of my need for IVF for baby 2 but I still wouldn’t change the course as there’s no guarantees with anything related to fertility.

@@Psychiatricnerd there should be more support, and recognition, for women willing to conceive while building up their careers. They should not be, or considered to be, mutually exclusive.

Failed relationships come at all ages and experience levels, as do poor choices. You didn't marry the wrong man because you were 23.

The problem when discussing such matters is that the personal experience can differ from the statistic

@@briandfox16 you have more chances to do it in a younger age, because you dont know yourself well and you havent learnt how to spot red flags to your potential perteners/ friends

I worked with and East Indian. He turned 30 and decided to move on with his life and get married. He talked to his parents and then they arranged for a match maker to to get list of suitable women in in India. They found six women and he interviewed them. After the third interview he said he didn't need to see the other three, he want the third girl. That may seem all rather primitive and "misogynistic", but it's probably a brilliant way to arrange marriages. Why? Because the physical attraction is placed at the bottom of the list of the reasons to marry. You allow a cool sober third party to select according things that are important to a long term relationship..class, religion, wealth, social standing... Etc. All the stuff that modern Westerners think is unimportant but are actually the most important.

@@secretname4190 it’s something ingrained in their culture, you make the best of it, as opposed to western societies that people constantly look for greener grass….

🙏❤

You aren't wrong, but you are missing something important: You as a parent will have such tremendous influence on your kids. Let's hypothetically say the world gets better, you will have still aged. So in the end, you will have missed out a bit. Being afraid of the future is a lose/lose.

I guess that would be an important topic that he should have addressed with his girlfriend already? If both care for each other, then they should be open enough to talk about it. It will affect their future

Not your place to ask. Also a significant amount of men don't want children so idk why you think you can just intrude on his decision?

@@inuhundchien6041 all established men want children. The ones you are referring to are called ‘boys’

​@@adrianhui6791 still men

Love that

yes 1/3 of infertility issues are due to the mans health. the blame is often assigned to the woman though.

People are NOT getting healthier. Look at the teen pregnancy rate. It's dropping not because teens aren't having sex, but because fertility is dropping in all age groups.

Yes. But unfortunately, we don't build our facts off of the outliers

@@cyberspace7208 There are plenty of people like my aunt. My husband's mom had her first at 19 and her last kid at 42. I also noted that women and men should check their fertility status around mid 20s (especially if they aren't married yet and not ready, but hope to be married and become parents one day).

@@dvbibbs192 Again, plenty of people is not a statistical fact.

You could become a Christian and look for a Christian man

@@austin7037 not as easy as it sounds

Seriously, though! I feel like he has no clue at all what it’s like dating in 2023

@@Nursegirlalexandra I know it’s hard. My point is just simply to look to Christians because they tend to take marriage a lot more seriously than non-Christians so you can increase your chances.

Studies confirmed that women who wait until their 30’s and 40’s actually live longer than women who give birth in their teens and twenties. Google this subject. Very interesting.