Retired a year ago. My philosophy now is that I no longer put up with people's crap. After many years of dealing with narcissists, I only give my time and attention to people who can give mutual respect. Time is too short, and none of us know how much time we have left. ❤

If you are reading this I just want to say that in no way are you not valuable or loved.

I always like to tell people to treat themselves like they would a good friend or loved one. Often times, we hold ourselves to such a high standard that we fail to show ourselves the same kind of love.

I use to make excuses for bad behaviour because I didn't love myself. Now I love myself I don"t take any bad behaviour.

When i started to love my self a lot of one sided and narc relationships faded away

I need to build a good, strong relationship with myself. Growing up I was always told I'm not good, I won't amount to anything. And that has stuck with me into adulthood.

Being so hard on myself for making mistakes. I wasn't always this way.

I'm here so no narcs can ever get near again. I want to learn about myself and others. There are so many manipulative people

"There's a difference between fighting for love and fighting to be loved."-Julia Kristina

Sometimes i hate the youtube algorithm but right now i love it because it brought me to you. Hi everyone, i am 56 yo and have been on a self esteem journey like forever. Love from new england. THANK YOU!!!

Julia you are GEM. 60 yrs old and I needed this. I wish I knew this in my 40s-50s. But now is also great to know

20:12 so crucial in knowing to throw in towel with relationship that is very mistreating even though they say and act like love you, if there's a lot done and said to disrespect and disregard your feelings for feeling worthy enough then thats not loving to yourself no matter how they try to make up for it, thats not real love its toxic and taking you for granted.

The fighting to be loved hit me hard. I think Im always trying to get people to like me and want them to love me.

Context: You're the only person that has to live with you from birth to death. The root of many issues is in our lack of self-love and self-acceptance 1. Taking things less personally - We think someone's words or actions mean more than what we think about ourselves 2. Overthinking - it's putting our self worth in the hands of other peoples ideas. When we are solid we don't need to outsource that. 3. Stressing about what other people think about you - We worry about what others think about us when we are unsure of what we think about ourselves 4. Over-justifying your decisions - We over-justify to control other's thoughts about it. We need them to see it our way for us to feel good about it. 5. Stressing about making the wrong decisions - It's less about making a mistake than what it means about us 6. Needing to be right/people to agree - When we need to be right we need others to see something about us. When we don't doubt ourselves it's okay if other's don't agree. Interjection: Ego. Our made up sense of self there to protect our authentic self. It's nice when people agree but the ego will make us "have" to be right. 7. Fearing making mistakes - Isn't about the outcome, it's about what we make it mean about you. You fear beating yourself up not the misfortune 8. Fighting for acceptance - How often to find yourself convincing people that you are good enough. Fighting for love, not fighting to be loved

When we speculate on what people think of us. Im guilty of that one. Starting to build a more solid relationship with myself!

Things that will get better when I love myself more: health, relationships, job prospects, home environment, skin, worldview, achievements, friendships, attitude, money management. Now to watch the video and see what you said!

I used to overthink everything. This was largely because I was in a relationship that made me feel less of myself. I was never told that I'm loved, comforted, appreciated and also always second guessed myself. Even when I left the relationship because it was clear that it wasn't good enough, I still thought I did the wrong thing and that I've hurt him. But I asked myself what about all the things he did to hurt me, whatabout my joy and my mental stability which was always disturbed? I think I didn't love myself enough to even believe that a good decision I took. I beat myself

You're always with yourself, so you might as well Love You .❤❤❤

Julia--Thank you so much! This needs to be taught in homes, schools, temples and places of worship. When you fill your own bucket of self-love, then you're ok to pour love into other people's bucket and you also make room for people to pour into yours. To anyone reading this, I hope you have a wonderful, peace-filled day!!

Sometimes in life we are so busy looking after everyone else, we forget about ourselves. You have to look after yourself ,nobody else will

You know,your exactly 💯 right,we have been programmed to rob ourselves of positive thoughts and experiences, but alot of people are evil with hidden agenda ,i am glad to be able to listen to your teachings

Fighting to be loved, want to be loved, I've recognized the real thing too. So I need to work on this one. People Pleaser deluxe.

I so needed that this morning specifically, and this week! Thank you for all your work and videos ❤

You’re gifted at what you do, Julia Kristina!

Hi Julia, this is Allard from the Netherlands, Amsterdam :) i’ve been watching and listening to your video’s since last week and want you to know that it is so helpfull. I’m hsving a hard time recovering from a burn out during this pandamic, not a good mix. But you help me te stay in focus and you bring your messages in such a loving and light way, thank you very much.

you’ve made a lot of deep insightful content but this takes the cake. I’ve had a sense of these different areas contributing to self doubt but to see that they all have a common underlying issue of self acceptance makes the prescription to fix extremely focused. Thank you!

And Julia, I love the way you pause and take deep breaths. I love that and it helps me feel confident in what you’re saying. Thank you for being you! Appreciate! 🙏🦋

Julia, you are an absolute gem. Your videos teach me something new every time and I’m very grateful, so thank you.

Thank You Sooo much Julia Kristina!!!! This is sooooo helpful!!! ❤❤❤ Definitely been doing the work but have more to go. This helps me see where I am more clearly

Thank you so much. When I am not in my best I become hypersensitive and push people away, not taking things personal has helped me a lot!

Looking forward to watching after work!! I’ve been steadily loving myself more and it’s a genuinely amazing feeling, though getting there is challenging ❤️

Just ordered the simple steps to self trust. Thank you!

Thank you so much for taking the time to do this video. I'm in the process of getting to love and accept myself. I was born with a handicap and I struggled a lot with it so I'm working on letting it go and finding my rhythm to say no or yes

This is pure gold Julia... if there were such thing as an Owner's Guide to Self-Awareness, this is it... thank-you!

I need to listen to this every single day, for the rest of my life. Thank you for this 🙏

Julia, I'm from Egypt, I follow you and you give me much inspiration and strength, thank you for being out there! ❤❤

My uncle sent me here-now that’s love ❤️

I love the simple plain language you use to explain each item. You are brilliant

The observations and advice in this video are invaluable. Absolutely great. You give out so much light and hope! Step one is to trust yourself and respect yourself. Thank you so much.

Hello Julia from Italy. I've been watching your videos from 2/3 weeks and all topics are very well explained and clear. Thank you for such a great effort you put in this work for us! Gabriele

This is so good! I recently made a big decision that a lot of people that are in my life do not like. This one really hits home for me right now.

Just found your channel. I was doing well with knowing who I am, self loving but in the last year I began to let others emotions run me! Thank you for your video, information!

Thank you for your videos. I struggle with this greatly, and it’s soothing to hear it spoken out because I can understand myself more

Shifting! My waking intuition said I should work on my SELF LOVE today!!! I was about to watch another video when I saw this perfect message here!!! Thank you! Synchronicity Intuition Gratitude. Check, check, ☑️

Thank You Julia for this amazing video and all of your awesome 👏 work. I feel so much better when I see and hear you. Have a wonderful day 🙏🙋‍♂️

Oh my goodness I have no idea why your first video popped into my Facebook feed (i think that's where I saw it?!) the growth and understanding I am gaining... yay!! Thank you!

Hi Julia, I first want to thank you. And let you know that I have been following psychologist for more than two years but you are the only one who made the switch in my life perspective. 🤗

You are absolutely terrific. Talking about so many truths

I think loving yourself is also loving others. It isnt fair to family and friends for us to outsource our worth and self esteem to them.

Learning to trust yourself- I had never thought of that! Very helpful video!

Julia I'm a newbie to The Shift Network. Thank you so much I've been listening to your coaching and guidance before I do my yoga Asana? I just wanted to say thank you for helping me reprogram my mindset and change my negative beliefs and old patterns 😊 much love and gratitude!

I listen to you every morning, you are a true blessing!

These ten things are consistent with your own boundaries. That's what's good about them.

I took the boundaries course a while ago and it just hit me. In order to set better boundaries I needed to get better at liking myself. It sounds obvious, but these layers keep getting revealed! Thank you! I always love your videos! ❤️

soo grateful i found this channel! i'm ila, currently a sophomore, who recently trying to investing on self-love this past months.. because how much pain i caused for going the other way. it really sucks that the environment i'm in have people-pleasing tendencies, but i don't feel alone for bravely taking this decision, i have myself. finally breathe out after my lungs were drenched in sorrow for too long might be the best thing that ever happen to me. one year ago, you can find me in the backseat, avoiding interactions yet overly pleasing people.. only for shitty treatments (mostly from myself). i had no idea how toxic i was, and isolating myself like that wouldn't change anything. and like what this video said, the root of my problems were lack of self-respect. this video explained my changes after growing to love myself well. i trust myself with my own beliefs, abundance, opinions, and self identity, therefore everything feels less personal to me. if there's different opinions, i take it with a grain of salt aka respecting it without thinking mine is way low than that. i also grow to know the essence of mistakes.. it's not something to avoid but to handle with full responsibility. these healthy responses are what i must do for so long. atleast i finally learned how to do this, even with the hard way. i'm so grateful and will always thrive to grow positively more, together with myself!

Thank you I’m grateful for your gifts!

Beautifully succinct , these subtleties are sooo powerful, thank you Julia Kristina 🙏🛡💚

when you said fighting for acceptance it made me cry, hit me right in the heart..

Just subscribed! Thank you so much. I needed to hear this deeply.

Just what I needed to hear... Thank you for putting out these videos.

this one hit so deep! Thank you sooooo much Julia certainly need to hear this.

Wow... all of these resonated with me! Really eye opening, thank you. New to this channel, and I’m already loving it.

I have had a couple years learning how to love myself and never knowing how to get back up from falling on my feet. This video has helped me 10x more then I try to give myself advice every day.

First time tuning in and I'm glad I did! Didn't understand what was going on with me until this. Will definitely have to build a much healthier relationship with myself.

I’ve already listened to this twice and been 🌟 starring so many of my notes. So grateful for your videos to help us become everything we are capable of being - which is amazing. Thank you Julia - you are not only making a difference but doing and being the difference! I embrace all the benevolence of your tremendous work. ♥️

Don't love anyone more than you should love yourself. Put yourself first across the board. Be kind with you, stroke your soul, listen to God's voice and not the ego's one. Be airy, be etherical, be bold, be playful. You live once therefore don't worry too much about what the others could think about you because who are they? More than you? Certainely not. Let your soul expresses loudly within you unapologetically

You are awesome!!!! Just subscribed because I love your content and it’s sooo needed 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🥰🥰🥰

I really needed to hear this. Thank you so much for this video. 🙏🏻 ❤️

I started watching you two years ago after getting out of a bad relationship. Throughout this time I’ve identified traumas & struggles I weren’t even aware of and today I can say I’m in a much better position than I was then. Thank you for the work that you do! It’s changing our lives❤️

This video spoke volumes to me- I am constantly breaking promises to myself- then feeling guilt and shame and an utter lack of confidence in my ability to ever get anything done. This problem runs deep in my psyche and has kept me from moving forward with the things in my life that I am passionate about- I have skills, I can do hard tasks but need some way to actually DO THEM!

Love this. So,helpful. Thank you

Wow! This is so true. I’m so dependent on approval. Then take it personally when I don’t get the approval. I approve of me already. It’s meaningful to be reminded.

Your awesome. I truly enjoy your videos. The individuals that know you personally are lucky because I believe you are very genuine. ❤ your advice is amazing 🙏

Excellent video! This is an excellent guide to evaluate where we are in the process...thank you!

Take good care of you! Absolutely great. Thank you.

I love the way you explain things. It's simple but yet sophisticated. You relate to people.

Christina thank you. You are truly inspirational 💕

TRUST IS THE KEY! Trusting yourself and later acquiring the ability to slowly start trusting others is the fundamental basis of a healthy relationship with yourself and consequently with other people. This message is POWER! Thank you Julia.

Hello Julia. Thank you very much for doing these videos. They are very helpful.

I didn’t realize how much I would see that I don’t have that great of a relationship with myself. I have spent so much of my life living in this Hell. I need to focus on and exploring the answers to these questions. Wow!!! I am so glad I came across your channel.

Thanks so much for this julia..Think i’ve been a volunteer victim,just need to keep contributing-calmness is a human superpower. The ability to not overreact or take things personally keeps your mind clear and your heart at peace Mental strength is incredibly important. Take care of your mind and the way you speak to yourself. Don’t let negative self-talk weaken you. Talk like you are blessed. Walk like you are blessed. Think like you are blessed. Work like you are blessed. And you will be, one way or another. Everything gets a bit uncomfortable when it’s time to change (or when it’s time to recalibrate your expectations). That’s just a part of the growth process. Things will get better. Be patient, and remind yourself that you will never have to force anything that’s truly meant to be. Just do your best, then adopt a “whatever happens, happens” mindset. Don’t try to force things-let go and allow the right blessings to flow. peeeace Ed

Julia, your weekly videos are like balm for the soul 😊

Thank you for these Julia

Thanks for this video I really needed it. I learned from this video I’m going to start believing myself more and stop having self doubt in myself.

You are changing lives Julia and you know it. Just wanna thanks you and God that I found out your channel Julia. I grateful that I have started taking care of my mental health at an early age of 18. Just thank you thank you and thank you

Your advice is wonderful and your voice is so soothing

This was an excellent video very informative I spent 36 years in a marriage riddled with intimacy issues on my husband’s part due to his childhood trauma I did everything to be the perfect wife to no avail as through therapy after he passed in ‘22 I learned he had Madonna complex after getting over that shock I realized I needed to take a look at all my relationships and why I chose ones that were not on equal footing I do have some great friends but also some that weren’t healthy. Your video sheds light on how we think about ourselves I’ve always been a confident person but a lot of what you said I could relate to fear of failure and over thinking things were my two biggest thank you you’re an incredible therapist

the reason why i struggle with a lot of self love issues is because of my childhood and my parents. i did everything in this video, and i love how simple you put this. i used to attract narcissistic people, i used to be a people pleaser, i am still so hard on myself overthink and it’s so freeing to not care about what people think. the freedom and learning to be in the moment is amazing. 🧡

You have been helping me with your show. Thank you.

Discovered your channel a month ago, your videos are very helpful. Thank you Julia Kristina.

I will listen to this several more times.Thank you.

" Do you want to be right... Or do I want to be happy?"... L LOVE AND NEED THAT!!

I'm crying 😢... This video was so mind blowing for me. Thank you so much.

I was actually researching and reading about these things. I want to learn to depend, love, care and improve myself instead of depending on others who arent available. I feel devalued when they arent around and that sucks. I dont want to be emotionally dependent on them. I wanna be ok just being myself. Thanks for this vid!

Thank you! This is such a great explanation of what l need to be changing in my relatinships. 👌

Hello! Happy to have found you and this channel!💕

Hi my name is Annabelle and I live in France. Watching your videos since few month as i was lacking boundaries and self love and caused me so much troubles. I’m better now and looking to improve my brand new skills to live my best life.

"When" we start to love ourselves. Problem is getting to the "when". Might as well ask me to change the color of my eyes!

Your videos have helped me enormously. Thank you.

Hi I’m just loved this topic and subscribed thank you!