10 Subtle Signs That Someone Is Emotionally Immature

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3 ай бұрын

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It can be confusing when someone acts in ways that seem selfish, oblivious, disrespectful, self-centred, reactive, or rude. But the thing is, most of the time when people repeatedly act in these ways it's because they lack emotional maturity. They both don't recognize the impact of their words or behaviours on others, and they don't know what to do with their own emotions or how to regulate themselves. When we can see that the way someone is behaving is not about us, but about them not knowing how to cope with their own big feelings it can help us stay calm, centred and grounded - which also then allow us to build our own emotional maturity.
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ABOUT JULIA:
Julia Kristina, MA, is a speaker, teacher, master therapist and mental wealth coach who helps smart, highly sensitive, heart centred humans get past anxiety, stress, and self-doubt so they can have better: Better relationships, a better life and feel better about themselves.
Through her membership program, The Shift Society, she helps people identify their deep rooted thoughts and beliefs that are keeping them stuck and struggling, and then teaches them how to take charge of their minds and emotions so they can thrive in all areas of their lives.
Julia’s expertise has been featured in Inc magazine, Psych Central, Mind Body Green and numerous other publications, podcasts and television outlets. She has also given talks in front of audiences of hundreds on stages across North America. Videos on her KZfaq channel have been watched more than 15 million times and she has built a community of over 375,000 people across social media platforms. When she’s not helping her clients and students increase their emotional intelligence and mental strength, she’s out on some kind of adventure with her three children in Vancouver, Canada.

Пікірлер: 362

@juliakristinamah 3 ай бұрын

Okay, truth time - are you here to identify potential emotional immaturity in someone else or within yourself?

@rongike 3 ай бұрын

both!

@EvaNemetKonc 3 ай бұрын

Guilty as charged. I've been trying to change, to learn (mainly from your videos, Julia) for years now (I'm 46), but man, it's hard. The struggle is real. Thank you for the caveat at the beginning of the video. ❤

@rickhanson3293 3 ай бұрын

Seems to work both ways. If I cannot already identify it in somebody else then I would be equally if not more immature already--or so I would think. I just take it as it flows and hope for insightful gain. Otherwise, I might just read into what you talk about what I want to hear as opposed to what you are actually saying.

@aleidaortiz4599 3 ай бұрын

Both

@Reborn_Enthusist 3 ай бұрын

Both

@4everOcean 3 ай бұрын

I'm here because I need to check in on my own emotional maturity.

@juliakristinamah 3 ай бұрын

Thanks for being honest about this - that actually shows a lot of emotional maturity.

@bcarolynn 3 ай бұрын

Yep, same here.

@4everOcean 3 ай бұрын

@@juliakristinamah thank you 😊

@justjeremiah4255 3 ай бұрын

🤝

@SometimesIdream333 3 ай бұрын

Me too 😂

@exaudi33 3 ай бұрын

Emotionally immature parents are truly terrifying for children. They have the power, the money, the physical size, they own the house, make the decisions.... My entire adult life has been spent recovering from them.

@Me-eb3wv 3 ай бұрын

My notes for later 4:46 Overreacting to everything 7:14 Being closed minded 10:27 Having a victim mentality 12:11 Being easily offended 13:15 Avoiding responsibility 18:37 Downplaying other’s achievements, jealousy The lesson I learned is that emotional immaturity comes down to not caring about how your actions make others around you feel.

@TheShavedleggs 3 ай бұрын

Thank you!

@Krishnapriya_7082 3 ай бұрын

Thank you

@jasonsanders8091 3 ай бұрын

Israel displays most of these traits as it genocides the Palestinians. Any criticism and they're offended. Super defensive. But they never feel shame.

@Pandan1351 3 ай бұрын

Very true 💯

@chyeahfurries 3 ай бұрын

This used to be me until very recently thank God I developed a sense of self awareness :/

@antonboludo8886 3 ай бұрын

Some people never leave toddlerhood in terms of emotional development.

@Clevelandsteamer324 3 ай бұрын

It’s called arrested development

@antonboludo8886 3 ай бұрын

Exactly! @@Clevelandsteamer324

@happygoluckystar8069 3 ай бұрын

@@Clevelandsteamer324😂😂

@juliakristinamah 3 ай бұрын

It's unfortunately true - they never learned any different.

@percystreet 3 ай бұрын

My wife

@ilariaciavatti9131 3 ай бұрын

Many people do not become emotionally mature because no one reacts to their ignorance, so they do not feel the need to change. Often, this is simply a privilege

@s7929 3 ай бұрын

Well usually its because everyone around them is ALSO emotionally immature. So its the norm.

@Koozomec 3 ай бұрын

It can happen with really attractive people. Extreme attractiveness can ruin a good character. Extreme intelligence, wealth, empathy etc. can also have a bad side.

@roykeiahlove581 3 ай бұрын

Turns out I’m the emotionally immature one! I have so much to work on but I am looking forward to the growth!

@tracieriley301 2 ай бұрын

Your off to a great start seeing you self reflect ❤

@carefulcarpenter 3 ай бұрын

We see this in others--- of course, never ourselves. 😊

@carefulcarpenter 3 ай бұрын

@@pennPi Funny, because first you blamed it on your family when you defined it as "gaslighting". ☺

@carefulcarpenter 3 ай бұрын

@@pennPi Not picking on you--- just thought it was ironic. My younger brother died last September. A couple of years ago he called me "a Trumper". He then explained that a counselor ad convinced him that his problem were a result of living with parents who lied. His final words to me the night before his final Hospice nurse visit was, "My two brothers are my heros." No--- our parents did not lie. When he lied, they called him on it. I asked him if he had ever known me to lie? No--- I am not a diehard "Trumper"; but I see a lot of projection from people that he triggers. My brother was one who learned the Art of the Deal in life--- which is bordering on deceit. But who really deceives us?

@juliakristinamah 3 ай бұрын

The emotionally mature ones are here to see it in themselves so they can learn and grow ;-)

@carefulcarpenter 3 ай бұрын

@@juliakristinamah My reply was censored.

@carefulcarpenter 3 ай бұрын

Censorship is a major clue.

@TonyaS 3 ай бұрын

My family (especially my brother) has so many of these traits. It's not my job to fix them, but to set boundaries (or in his case no contact), BUT, to really examine myself and make sure I don't repeat these behaviors on others either. I get that it's so easy to see these traits in other people and yet we sometimes do them ourselves. I want to be better than that.

@ao6685 3 ай бұрын

Well said!

@PifchoBG 3 ай бұрын

u can only examine yourself to a certain point. self analysis does not work !!!

@Veruska75 3 ай бұрын

@@PifchoBGNot everyone has the money to see a therapist. Really, most people don’t.

@M.D.M.X 3 ай бұрын

@TonyaS For what it's worth, it seems (in a nutshell) that you're clearly already 'better' than that. Not only is there a very important difference between, 1. You: Having the honest self-awareness to reflect on "sometimes doing something myself", that then leads to an individual responsibility > capability of understanding the why and/or what to do with/about it. A type of empathetic introspection/recognition that besides yourself, often extents to others as well. 2: Those in question: Seemingly void of internally aimed acknowledgement or complex structures of meaning, perception, consequence etc. Limited/restricted to surface levels of basic taught ways of accepting reality within and around them. Essentially anything beyond that is incomprehensible to consider, formulate or process. It's really unfortunate, but having experienced it to such a ridiculous extent it was as if not from the same plain of reality. No matter how much I tried to explain intent or correct misunderstandings, ask for clarification, painted the whole picture, different positive approaches, avoid things, you name it. It was as if nothing ever got heard, noticed or remembered. All I got was someone stuck on playing The Negative Setting ft. Auto-instant Deflection on repeat. Never adding anything new, or any original personal input. Nor open to hearing those. -- From basically raising myself to were all my life most people I met (even strangers) complimented me for how much a conversation with me had helped them in some way, so it was something I felt proud over, something I was seemingly naturally good at and appreciated for. But it stood absolutely zero chance against how unbelievably impossible to talk to someone like that could be... Even though I sympathize for potential causes and in this case might even know what might've, but at some point it's just as simple as, this is just who they are and will never even adjust let alone somewhat change. To them you're the problem. Best for both parties to then indeed cut your losses, but claim your lessons. You've earned them.

@happygoluckystar8069 3 ай бұрын

What gets me is that people who are so oblivious feel deeply offened when you point it out. they usually say „I am just honest, you deal with it” 🙄

@juliakristinamah 3 ай бұрын

Yeah - honesty does not mean say whatever you think without any regard for anyone else.

@happygoluckystar8069 3 ай бұрын

@@juliakristinamah 💚

@selorasoulstice 3 ай бұрын

Or "this is who I am, accept me as I am".

@carefulcarpenter 3 ай бұрын

Spiritual growth is a lifelong process.

@antonboludo8886 3 ай бұрын

Very true.

@amyproudfoot6611 3 ай бұрын

Truth 💯

@lesleyelalami2562 3 ай бұрын

Some don't even take the first step which is sad.

@carefulcarpenter 3 ай бұрын

@@lesleyelalami2562 Yes--- we live in a sad world of people who prefer to feel sad. Think about the need to feel like a victim? What people fear is truth. Sad.

@lesleyelalami2562 3 ай бұрын

@@carefulcarpenter I've never been the type to focus on to problems, thankfully the minute a problem appeared I began to look for the way out and over to move it off my path..... thank God xxx.

@stephanijeopdevelt5600 3 ай бұрын

Introducing signs begins at 4:20

@sandlerfrancois666 3 ай бұрын

Thank you!!!

@minggi_ 3 ай бұрын

Here to check myself

@juliakristinamah 3 ай бұрын

that honesty is a sign of emotional maturity!

@yougotgroove 3 ай бұрын

Give them compassionate curiosity

@ed000 3 ай бұрын

I'm watching this for my own behaviour,to unlearn and relearn!

@Di...747 3 ай бұрын

Another reason for emotional immaturity is being extremely coddled and kept from the realities of the world.

@foxiefair123 3 ай бұрын

My son.😂That was my mom’s doing.

@lindanorris2455 3 ай бұрын

right on!

@LindaOhearn-mt9vk 2 ай бұрын

My youngest son for sure

@sharonp4106 3 ай бұрын

Great insights as well as a reminder to check in with myself first, before reacting, to see what is going on with me. 😊❤

@juliakristinamah 3 ай бұрын

Amen amen Sharon!

@gracegarce8026 3 ай бұрын

This content is also a form of self-check to gauge my emotional maturity as well. Thank you ❤

@sllingky 3 ай бұрын

This has been so educational and healing. One year ago this weekend I learned my mother is a vulnerable narcissist. It has been a hell of a year unpacking that and beginning to heal. This video explains a huge part of who my mom is, and it took me until nearly the age of 50 to see it. So much pain and brokenness. Thank you for your content. I'll definitely listen to more!

@Marekcatholic 3 ай бұрын

Shining a light on the important issues. Thank you Julia! :)

@juliakristinamah 3 ай бұрын

You're so welcome Shifter - glad you're here.

@Marekcatholic 3 ай бұрын

@@juliakristinamah Thank you! :)

@manahilnauman2239 3 ай бұрын

You answered a lot of my questions. Thank you 🙏🏼

@fingerprint5511 3 ай бұрын

I'm yet to encounter a human who is emotionally mature. Considering over 95% of decisions made by humans are emotion-based ...!

@antonboludo8886 3 ай бұрын

I have met a few.

@rongike 3 ай бұрын

truth. I keep going ????????????? whenever I hear people talk about how humans need to stop being in their mind and embrace their emotions more, when literally no one makes logical decisions, it's all always emotional 🤣

@antonboludo8886 3 ай бұрын

Not even Vulcans, haaaaaaa! @@rongike

@Dezzyyx 3 ай бұрын

@@rongikeembrace feelings is different to embrace being emotional. Feeling is lacking in people today, it's all thinking (no matter how flawed). Feeling is what say animals go by, it's intelligent but relies more on intuition than active thought. Being emotional is a lack of intelligence, more pure reaction.

@rongike 3 ай бұрын

@@Dezzyyx feeling is not lacking in people these days, they just run on negative feelings like pride all the time and make their decisions from that, rather than considering their whole emotional spectrum

@user-or7jn2pp4f 3 ай бұрын

Yes yes yes you are so on point, thanks for this conversation

@beckymabry2602 3 ай бұрын

Thank you so so much for all this content. I come to it often when I’m triggered by something and it helps me feel more grounded. Life changing. Content. Thank you!

@juliakristinamah 3 ай бұрын

You're so welcome Becky - glad you're here and on this journey with us.

@ReeseBose-db8tj Ай бұрын

Outstanding video!!

@DeAzul7902 3 ай бұрын

I thank you, Julia, for making my journey easier with your knowledge, kindness & love. Keep it coming. We need you.

@georgezadorozny1976 3 ай бұрын

Outstandingly insightful and helpful. Thank you!

@Blixtwixy 3 ай бұрын

I noticed I can come off mature and calm, or immature and emotional, as a reflection of who I'm talking to. As if somebody else being immature or upset makes me want to back up and not put in the mental effort to maintain my own responses, because they didn't put that energy in either.

@rongike 3 ай бұрын

as empaths we naturally mirror others. I think that's good to a certain extent, if you're very rigid in your maturity then you can alienate others, it's good to meet people where they're at, just gotta be mindful to not cross our own boundaries of how we want the show up and not drop too low.

@francesbeth2077 3 ай бұрын

It's not usually about the comment, it's usually something deeper if someone becomes emotionally triggered. Usually, it stems or is rooted in the partner showing lack of consideration or respect on a larger scale.

@VeronicaMxoxo 3 ай бұрын

Thank you so much for your videos! What you share on topics like this is so helpful to know where to start in becoming more mature and aware. Your videos are so informative while being blended with such compassion for others and their situation. It’s really encouraging, as I feel oftentimes this sort of information is used to finger point and villainize others, rather than to understand them.

@shalome63 2 күн бұрын

Excellent information🙏

@jackiecook753 3 ай бұрын

Great video!!!!!!!!!!! It hits home.

@mariagiakalis4615 3 ай бұрын

Dear Julia hi... thank you so much for the insight. I had an inkling about a certain person, but the points you raised have confirmed that this person was emotionally immature. Thank you for helping me see things more clearly ❤

@juliakristinamah 3 ай бұрын

Hi! Thanks for being here - what's something that you took away from this talk?

@williamchevalier2224 Ай бұрын

Great video

@rkai1213 3 ай бұрын

Thank you for this very helpful vidéo 😊🤗

@juliakristinamah 3 ай бұрын

you're so welcome. Glad you found it helpful.

@zakiamwoma4647 Күн бұрын

Thank you. Different human beings have different perspectives,views and background. I used to live in emotional immaturity. I still do,but I can hold better than then because of listening to teachings like this. Emotional immaturity borders on toxicity too

@chrishanson7911 3 ай бұрын

You call it emotionally immature I call it emotionally insecure.

@vandafromvald4512 3 ай бұрын

So helpful thank you

@susanstancliff2937 3 ай бұрын

Thank you! It makes me realize what I can approve on and understand where someone else is coming from.

@ark194 3 ай бұрын

There needs to be compassion. My parents suck, and I totally understand that I didn’t learn and it’s a struggle to not fell shamed or be shamed from this. When you know better, you do better.

@NM-ug3rw 3 ай бұрын

such a good video THANK YOU!!

@cindybriden372 3 ай бұрын

Thank you!

@selorasoulstice 3 ай бұрын

I'm new here, but not unfamiliar with the concept of emotional immaturity, as I've been diving into Lindsay Gibson's work. I will say though that this video was still incredibly helpful and validating, thank you! I just subscribed 😊

@jaimierose2985 2 ай бұрын

I think i used to be way more emotionally immature. I can see my old self in some of these. And a few i could stand to work on for sure.

@DeAzul7902 3 ай бұрын

I'm here to learn ways to keep myself regulated - such a good word & good state - so that I can be more than my emotional pain. More than my physical pain. I want to enjoy my journals, read books, make art & Art. I want to be joyous, grateful, content & in step with the little girl inside who was so hurt. I want to leave the illusions & be real. And kind. ❤🎉🎉🎉

@vladimirnoriega5793 2 ай бұрын

I've met people older than 50 years old and are emotionally immature they're still acting and talking like a child and I've known people in their 20s and are very mature in their speech and act

@kenjones102 3 ай бұрын

I really like that this video is in black and white. It's refreshing and stylish.

@brittrubin9461 3 ай бұрын

Thank you very interesting.

@-GloryDays 2 ай бұрын

Good content. Thank you. On the other hand, it’s not kind of anyone to publish their children’s personal issues for the world to see.

@chyeahfurries 3 ай бұрын

This is a very compassionate way of explaining emotional immaturity thanks for posting :)

@craigmerkey8518 3 ай бұрын

I love this phrase "brain has been molded by" experiences, perspectives and society.

@patriciacole8773 3 ай бұрын

Really glad to find you. I struggle in a marriage with a difficult husband. Long term. To proceed forward I want to imagine a garden structure. Low walls. Fences. Trellises. Shapes of lay out. Height variety. Even bridges. He is stern and uncommunicative. I am enjoying the work of the 16 character types analysis. And I’m Christian so I want God’s will. My new goal is to understand where I begin and end. How to be happy in spite of the daily aggravations from others. How to thrive with an emotionally immature person and grow myself. Blessings. I love this information❣️

@lindanorris2455 3 ай бұрын

WOw! are you helping me so much!

@cherylanderson9126 3 ай бұрын

Always love your insight. I can’t get used to your new face; miss your lovely, original face. 💕

@kristinroberts651 9 күн бұрын

I’ve always wondered why my husband hardly ever comments on my piano playing; not necessarily a compliment, but at least an acknowledgement - his emotional immaturity is present in SO many areas of our marriage and life with daughters.

@antonboludo8886 3 ай бұрын

4:18 - Freaking out over nothing. Both my parents did that all the time. I also did it for a long time but no longer. 4:52 - Tuning out. Children do this. Justin Trudeau does this. 6:45 - Robotic thinking. 7:52 - No mental filtering. Narcissist. 9:27 - Self-absorbed orators. I have just learned that my daughter-in-law has cancer but I am suffering more because I have a pimple on my chin. 11:40 - They just want to avoid unpleasantness. Blaming others for what they caused. Your son is 9 years old, so this is understandable. The most important skill of a good conversationalist is listening. B/W thinking. So true. We are both saying the same thing, but I am right and you are wrong. I love contradicting you for its own sake just to show you how smart I am. You say "Left", I will say "Right". Tomorrow you will say "Right" and I will say "Left". Either way, what I say is always correct and what you say is always incorrect. Undermining other peoples' successes is the ultimate sign of envy and jealousy. Such people can have Schadenfreude emotional "orgasms".

@Nick-kf3io 3 ай бұрын

"Justin Trudeau does this" I think you're on the wrong channel if you're one of those JT obsessed people. Literally bringing him into any conversation when it's completely besides the point. Get a hold of your own mind please ❤

@antonboludo8886 3 ай бұрын

You are dead wrong. @@Nick-kf3io

@pamelaruth7400 3 ай бұрын

Hi! Thank uou!

@Karletta623 3 ай бұрын

This behavior also show up the exact same way with people with ADHD and autism. So we have to be very careful. Because both have a hard time regulating their emotions.

@flowerchild89 3 ай бұрын

I really enjoy your channel 😀! I'm a new subscriber.

@juliakristinamah 3 ай бұрын

Hey! Welcome - really glad you're here.

@user-vb6oq3ou4d 3 ай бұрын

1) Overreacting (more than the reality of the situation) 2) Running away from talking about it 3) isn’t open to other opinions (doesn’t apprehend that ppl have different experiences in life growing up so their opinions are different) 4) no tact (no filtering of their words) 5) self-absorbed 6) sarcasm (deflecting responsibility: narcissistic trait) 7) self- annihilating (everything is our fault) 8) very defensive ( triggered their trauma or sour spot so they get defensive) 9) Very rigid in their ways (my way or the highway/ it’s black or white) 10) Downplaying your success/ puts you down/ blow it over/ ignores it/ threatened by your success

@mick776gold 3 ай бұрын

Thank you

@hellygeer 3 ай бұрын

How is overreaction calculated? Where's the line? There is a trait of being highly sensitive, and this includes feeling whatever is hitting their senses at the same time the emotionally distressing interaction is going on. Like a drill piercing their skin and brain at the same time. The combination can produce a greater reaction in a sensitive person. Which is usually followed by the other person saying derisively, "Your so sensitive!"

@jenp5759 3 ай бұрын

@@hellygeeragreed. Not everyone has knowledge of HSPs.

@brianarbenz7206 3 ай бұрын

I've watched it now, and I identify with some of those signs in my past, and in some other people I have known more recently. I have made much progress in the past dozen years and am happy about that, though seeing this video made me realize that some old subtle tendencies to be self-focused still exist in me.

@Leispada 3 ай бұрын

as a b&w and obsessive thinker, let me say not having a clear yes or no can be torture 😅 it certainly is a lack of mental maturity and a trauma response, and i believe im fixing it. But just know.. torture! OCD sucks ass

@brainsandbeauty11 2 ай бұрын

Hi.. I am new to here :) this video definitely resonated with me about myself. Any suggestions on the next video to assist with emotional immaturity?

@Quixcilver7.62 3 ай бұрын

I look up from my phone after 4 minutes and realized she hadn't even began.

@bordercollie1140 3 ай бұрын

Exactly the same. Get to the point.

@joyswenson7941 3 ай бұрын

Holy cow. Several of these describe my mom over a certain issue we’ve been facing.

@genevieveking7666 3 ай бұрын

there are times i catch myself slipping still learning the tools

@unclepigg 3 ай бұрын

It seems every social media user is emotionally immature 😆

@antiochiaadtaurum3786 3 ай бұрын

Point number 1 isn't necessarily always the case. Sometimes other emotionally immature people (such as toxic parents) push you too react. They know the buttons that will make you freak out, or enrage you. However emotionally immature the recepiant of this treatment is, the toxic parents are the real problem. The point I am trying to make is don't blame yourself for emotional immaturity if someone is abusing you to react and blow up. Blame them, abandon them, and work on your own emotional regulation from there. It's not your fault, it's theirs.

@Books_Makeup 3 ай бұрын

This is true. I agree about working on own emotional regulation. In my scenario, my dad and mom are both toxic. I had to cut him off because he would drag me into arguments. He would do this by asking my opinion on something that he was talking to my mom about. I would defend my mother, and my dad would take me out of context and take my supporting my mom as disloyal to him. He would project and then go onto say I was being disloyal to my mother. It's really interesting to watch this triangulation pattern. How abusers accuse you of the thing they are doing in order to bait you is really interesting. I'm interested in human psychology so your comment piqued my interest. Now my response is to not allow myself to get in situations where I can get triangulated. Awareness, therapy, cutting off toxic relationships and medication have helped immensely 💜💜. If you or anyone else is in a similar situation. I totally understand💜. Take care of yourself🙏

@happygoluckystar8069 Ай бұрын

@@Books_Makeup classic triangulation. 🥺 had the same reality for 40 years, just it was my mother who played the part of your fater’s 🤣

@aliahmedyacin721 3 ай бұрын

Thank you

@melliecrann-gaoth4789 2 ай бұрын

This helps me with my introspection of why they are like this with me.

@alicevill2259 3 ай бұрын

Im here for me. I decided to change my emotional inmature ways. So far in this journey Ive learned alot but I still am working on things. So when someone pushes my buttons they do give me anxiety abd trigger me😅 later I just replay in my mind what I could have done to not react to it. Thats how I learn 😅

@hellygeer 3 ай бұрын

I see a lot of myself in here. Things I've become aware of and worked on and been able to halt, or reduce the frequency and duration of, episodes of acting immature.

@Sad-Lemon 3 ай бұрын

This description very accurately fits a narc. A narc being someone who never matured emotionally past toddlerhood.

@vivainvestparaguayvivainve2321 3 ай бұрын

I love the fact, that you didn't use the term narcessist. In my thinking every narc is highly emotional immature, but not everyone of them is a cluster B. After my first toxic girl in my 50ies I lost finally my own emotional immaturety for good. Since then I stayed single for a year and became then surprisenly starting dating again very attractive for women more so than before. But I can't find a woman that brings my new standard to the table. I had become that allergic, that I get the first sign of immaturity loud and clear. I live in the moment and can observe closly cuz I'm good with myself. After the first sh..it burger I be able to predict the next three to four outlandish moves and end it after a few dates, no matter the sex was great or not. I started dating women around 30/40 while me being 58. But I was that disapointed that I now date girls from 18 to 25. If I get not what a woman is supposed to be, why not a glowing girl in her prime without kids and trust issues and a far higher sex drive? I'm top fit, young girls are crazy about me and I have to take care not getting a 14 years old in South América. A woman 20 years younger than me is an old lady at my side and she can't even keep my walking pace, I won't discuss their physical sexual problems. And what is shocking to me, I find younger girls even be far more emotional mature. I asked myself how can that be? It might be their higher reality based self esteem cuz of their youth and beauty. Maybe society has become a little less neurotic and they grew up a bit healthier. Older women who are single have proven that they can't keep a relationship or can't vet and value a strong healthy man, unless they are a widdow. Why even try? In case of a girl there are the relationship girls still in the pool. I live and love now against my formal morals and believes. None of the girls dumps me, they wait for my call. I ring up the one who made me happy the most, who I could make happy the most, but most of the time they call me.There are no lies, they let me be myself, cuz they are not desperate. After my ground zero I kept only one friend. But I found a friend that is the best friend I ever had. He and his wife live in an open relationship. Both are friends and I have become part of their families. Even if the guy is good looking, he isn't that good with girls, but there is no envy. Envy, a feeling I never had in my life. It makes me so happy to see a couple being that happy. I had judged an open relationship before, but they'd never judged me with all my young girls. Their dougter 22 is married to a great guy who became a great friend as well. They even try to help me vetting the girls for a relationship or presenting me to women, cuz they know I'm a relationship guy. But over time I have changed. My standards might be high, maybe too high but the worst working against a relaionship is now: The girls give me everything and more and the threshold to put up with sh..it had become extremly low. It still makes me sad being happy. I would even love to start a family one more time being a grandpa, cuz I could. Pain is needed for change, sometimes you become even who you are, but you might not like it. But if people truly care for that person that you truly are, it is worth it.

@babycakes8434 3 ай бұрын

My ex was cheating on me, always looking and searching from day 1. It is not my fault, it was his fault.

@sarsoorGio 3 ай бұрын

I become more self-focused when I'm depressed, which I have been in a big way the last year or so. My least favorite. My "victim mentality" is something I learned from my mother who is the poster child for emotional immaturity, and it's something I have to really work at consciously, as part of my subconscious programming. Thx for the vid.

@lorenajules4651 3 ай бұрын

This is my 52 yr old husband and I'm fed up of his behaviours! Like really fed up!

@pgcpdc 3 ай бұрын

Same here ! And he s 52 too ! Was never held or taught to hold himself accountable for his behaviour. Mommy always saved his ass, still does 🙄

@meloneymoore8856 3 ай бұрын

Thank you sooo much for exposing this 💛💛💛-Xclusyph Icon

@calmingbabysleep1256 3 ай бұрын

Video starts at 4:20. Thank you Julia ❤

@lakehairdontcare3398 3 ай бұрын

Thank you 🙏🏽 This just reminds me of what religion can create. Loved all your examples for my own growth. I am looking for a support group for sexual trauma, familial trauma, emotional trauma, and the range of negative emotion I continue to attempt to manage on the daily. does your group help on this kind of level?

@Portia620 3 ай бұрын

I’m working on this with my adult child!!!!

@irishmclass2042 3 ай бұрын

Oh my gosh, at 7:00 you described my Narc older Sister (78) who makes copious negative comments about everyone. No one meets her standard expectations!!! It is so grinding to listen to! She wears me out! She dislikes every one of my friends and picks each one apart. She IS very focused on herself! She has little empathy for others. Only in small doses can I take it.

@lesleyelalami2562 3 ай бұрын

Maybe she does that out of jealous as she wants you for herself?

@nancyhope2205 3 ай бұрын

Seen them all. Did a few too but recognized it in myself.

@travelpalz 3 ай бұрын

its hard when its your mother that's emotionally immature

@Cowface 3 ай бұрын

This is my mother to a T and I gotta tell you it’s so weird to discover that you are more mature than your parent

@Prophezora 3 ай бұрын

Its actually scary!!

@Cowface 3 ай бұрын

@@Prophezora yes but in a way, it helps with self compassion because it’s like “well if this is what I was raised by, no wonder I have the issues I do!”

@babycakes8434 3 ай бұрын

My father is a narcissist, sometimes you can talk to him, other times it is like talking with 2 year old brat😵‍💫 Through my life he ignorednthe huge stuff and blew up and raged over nothing. He was looking for a reason to blow up, whenever he was ready to blow up. I feel like his behavior made me stuck in a freeze mode. I have so much to learn, that lifetime might not be enough to do so. In the meantime I will be happy when I can enjoy life a bit without a struggle.

@jackieconrad4500 3 ай бұрын

You've just described my older sister.

@Vaxedia Ай бұрын

My mother is very immature. She's complaining about the amount of time I spend on my phone. I don't wanna talk to her because I prefer learning things from mature people on the internet.

@user-vw3xf2dw4t 3 ай бұрын

I clicked to learn more about---me. I once went into a therapist's office (18 yrs ago) with a list of 15 faults/character flaws I believed I had. I read them off. His jaw dropped. I then presented the written list to him. He said in 30 yrs of practice it was the first time anyone had ever done that. He didn't know what to say, so he offered--nothing. Eventually I stopped seeing him (NOT saying all therapists are this sub-par. Some therapists are super. He was not among them.) I found silent meditation helped more than paying that guy (doctorate)--who wasn't equipped to handle any client who wasn't simply complaining and blaming--others, ad nauseam.

@kathymaslowskibrightflower9638 Ай бұрын

Yes makes sense. I'm fed up of guys in my life, pissing on my chips when I accomplish something 🎉

@AlohaMichaelDaly 3 ай бұрын

Julia, your friend cut you off and it’s so sad to hear you talk about it. You understandably recognize her lack of development and capacity to handle the trigger and that shows your developmental maturity and skills which is a great benefit to your audience and those in your outreach. It must be a joy when a good therapist helps an individual grow. I think it must be very sad and difficult when the resources get rejected.

@gdm1979 3 ай бұрын

Many of these traits are common on Cluster B personalities…

@tanyam2701 2 ай бұрын

Some of these are also signs of emotional exhaustion: tuning out due to overload, talking in a monologue as a desperate attempt to unburden oneself, uncontrolled outbursts. Context is everything.

@earthgrazer5511 3 ай бұрын

Gosh, I came here to evaluate the people in my life but ended up seeing the signs in myself. Question: What if the person has anxiety? Is it possible to have general anxiety disorder and be emotionally mature at the same time?

@MyFrankieee 3 ай бұрын

Of course you still can have emotional intelligence 🎉

@KingNigelthegreat 3 ай бұрын

Emotional Regulation: Somatic Tools, Feeling Safe, and Self-

@ksjanna 3 ай бұрын

Can you do a video on how I should react with emotionally immature people? Because when they lash out at me it does hurt me. Do I remove myself from the situation, do I give them advice, what do I do then?

@amelittaberretta9109 3 ай бұрын

What about if you have been Ghosted , spooked, gaslit ,- this is a terrifying experience if one is ALONE, old and powerless being the recipient of such treatment. Is the recipient immature? When being terrified by such actions.

@cynthiaraiserjeavons399 2 ай бұрын

I am sensing excess drama (emotional immaturity???!!!!) on this channel. This is my first and last time here..

@rachelturgeon114 2 ай бұрын

I would love a time stamp.

@lesliengo8347 3 ай бұрын

I believe the vast majority of people, including myself, are emotionally immature because most weren't taught how to be more emotionally mature. My parents, former classmates from college, strangers on the Internet, politicians, teachers, and many more demonstrated at least a few listed. I am glad to be recognizing emotional immaturity in others and in me and how I want to handle immaturity.